It was only because of the mercies of God that, after years of wrestling, I finally relinquished control of my love life to Him. Contrary to my expectations, it had nothing to do with ceasing to care about marriage. Instead I learned to become a living sacrifice: regularly, trustfully pouring out all my longings before Him.

-click here to read the rest of “His Love Stories” by Elisabeth over at Boundless

And don’t forget to re-read Elisabeth’s “Seasons of Singleness” series right here on YLCF.

I knelt by my bedside to pray
One night as I was all alone.
I wanted to do what was right,
Surely He would show me the way.

I knelt by my bedside to pray,
To Him I gave all my dreams.
To fulfill, to lay aside-
His will alone I sought that day.

“I will lead you, I will guide your way,
I will be there each moment
I am by your side with you
As you kneel by your bedside to pray”
I knelt by my beside to pray.
I poured out my heart that night,

I asked Him to guide my steps,
To never let me to stray.

I knelt by my bedside to pray,
That He would stand by my side
To help me, to guide me
To teach me what to say.

“I will lead you, I will guide your way,
I will be there each moment
I am by your side with you
As you kneel by your bedside to pray”

-Chantel Harding ‘04

Photo of a Northern California sunset by Jennessa Harding Dizon, 2006

As a homeschool grad, author Natalie Wickham hears lots of questions about homeschooling. In fact, one of them — “Do you get to wear your pajamas to school?” — inspired the title of her book. At the heart of all the questions from parents, she sees “the unspoken search for the assurance that if they homeschool their children they will turn out okay.”

In Pajama School, Natalie provides specific, real-life encouragement for all ages. To students encountering homeschooling for the first time, Natalie gives reassurance that studying at home is not meant to cut them off from the real world, but to make the real world their classroom. It was Natalie’s passport to personalized, hands-on experience in entrepreneurial enterprises, politics, education, music, and more.

As she tells the story of her own family’s homeschooling experience with honesty and vulnerability, she gives parents a way to look into the future and see that their children don’t have to have a perfect childhood in order to become creative, multi-faceted, successful, well-adjusted adults. Studying amidst all the normal hustle and bustle of a family of six children didn’t stop Natalie from working in a tea room, running a music studio, designing curriculum, teaching character in public schools and at homeschooling conferences… and even writing a book!

To young single women, Natalie presents a balanced way to resolve the dilemma of being a marriage-honoring woman…who isn’t married yet. She shares the way God continually expands her horizons while tempering her natural leadership skills with femininity, humility, and reliance on Him. And by opening up some of her inner struggles, she shows that God can be trusted to perfectly design each individual’s life course, bringing along the experiences necessary to bring both maturity and comfort.

“I love encouraging weary Moms not to give up, and sharing with them the daily struggles we encountered as a homeschool family,” Natalie says in her introduction. “I also love challenging children and teenagers to embrace these years of their life and make the most of their homeschool experience for the glory of God.” By living a life that is not just about accomplishments, but about character, Natalie Wickham does just that.

See below for details on how to enter to win your own copy of Pajama School.

Official YLCF Giveaway Entry Rules:

• You may enter this drawing multiple times! For each entry, please leave a comment telling us one of the following things:

1. A favorite brief memory of growing up homeschooled.
2. The first name of someone you think would enjoy this book and why.
3. That you have posted a link to this giveaway on your own blog (include your blog URL).
4. That you have uploaded a Pajama School banner to your blog or website (include URL).

• Don’t forget to include your name and email address in the space provided on the comment form of each entry you make (your email address will not be published, but we need a way to contact you if you win!).
• This drawing open to readers with U.S. mailing addresses only, please.
• Drawing ends Tuesday, July 14, 2009.
• The winner will be chosen randomly and notified by email.

You can also purchase a copy of Pajama School at these sites:

• Amazon
• ABE Books
• Sibro Publishing is making available a special discount code good for 20% off. When prompted, type in “YLCF.”
• For more information, visit the official Pajama School website.

P.S. Congrats to Melissa for being YLCF’s winner of Pajama School!

Instead of a wedding ceremony on a sunny Saturday in June, ours was on a rainy Wednesday night in January; but it was not lacking in love and joy…

read the rest here:
“You’re in the Army Now!”

P.S. In case you haven’t noticed yet, now you can subscribe to the latest courtship stories in your feed reader: ylcf.org/courtship-stories/feed/

by Claudia Adams

Claudia, do you take Harris to be your husband; to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?

On June 22, 1969 I stood before God and all my assembled family and friends and “plighted my troth” and promised to love, honor and obey my husband. Yes, I wanted obey included in my vows even though I knew that phrase was rather out of date. I believe I thought it sounded noble and romantic. I did mean what I said…I just did not fully understand the working out of those vows.

My husband and I were married while we were still in school; I was an undergraduate and he was in law school. We met at Mercer University in Macon, Georgia. I remember the first time I ever saw him. It was in the fall of my freshman year and I was sitting in chapel at the Thursday morning assembly and turned to see him standing in the back of the chapel. The thought went through my mind that I was going to marry him…it was as if I knew I would.  For the remainder of that school year whenever I saw him he just stared at me and never said a word to me.  The next fall Harris transferred to Georgia Tech 100 miles from Macon.  I thought that I must have been wrong about marrying him since I had never even spoken to him! That same fall  my cousin, who was my roommate at Mercer, received a phone call from Harris asking her if she would set up a “blind date” with me for the following weekend for both Friday and Saturday nights. That was such a long week!! I still remember what I wore that first date and how I felt coming down the stairs from my room and seeing him waiting for me in the “date parlor”. One year later we were engaged and the next year we were married. I was 20 and he was 21…soooo young!

Being married while still in college and law school was quite a challenge. Sadly it was a challenge that many of our friends were not able to overcome. My husband and I both came from families where marriage was considered to be a lifetime covenant and commitment. I know God protected and blessed us in thousands of ways through those years.  For me, as a young bride I felt safe and protected in the assurance that my husband was going to take care of me. That first summer, I stayed in our little apartment and wrote wedding thank you notes and tried to get used to planning meals and buying groceries with not much money. My slightly-built husband worked pouring concrete that hot summer and came home every night with blistered hands and a sunburned face and back.  Those weeks set the whole tone for our marriage. Through the years whenever storms would rage around us and it sometimes felt as if we would literally drown I would recall how my husband laid his life down for me from the first weeks of our life together.

I still am amazed when I look back over these forty years to remember all the tender mercies and blessings that the Lord bestowed so richly on us. I vowed to love and honor my husband and to forsake all others. One of the great challenges of those early months and years was to do just that. All of my friends were still active in our sorority and school activities. They did not go to the Laundromat every Saturday or try to buy groceries for a week with $25.00. We lived several miles from campus so when we were home we were home and when we were on campus we were in class. I could not drive back and forth to sorority meetings in my old dormitory. It seemed strange, and out of place. We had lots of friends and spent a great deal of time with them but I felt that my sorority activities belonged to a past season of my life. So I forsook those “others”.

This is a pattern that I have followed all my married life. In post-college life my activities with my girlfriends were times that were not only enjoyable but fit well into the pattern of our lives. But when our children were very small, it seemed that every time I would go to an evening meeting for Junior League or Symphony Guild Harris would have to call me because someone had a raging fever, an earache, a stomach flu or some other “I-want-my-Mommy” event. I found that I could be very fulfilled in keeping many of my activities during the day and keeping most nights at home unless I was on a date with my husband. We were blessed with our most precious Mary who took care of our children on date nights and all the times we were away from home.

“Forsaking all others” looks different to everyone. Certainly the Biblical command to be faithful to your husband is not to be violated, but I believe in our society that we do not think enough about the “others”–whomever or whatever they might be.

I trust my husband completely and he does me also. That has always been a major part of my “knowing” my husband. He is an honest man and has a very deep devotion to the truth. That freedom has been a blessing in our marriage and in the lives of our children. I think being faithful to your husband also means speaking well of him. I’m sure you know the old saying, “If you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all.” Harris has often said that just because I think something does not mean I have to say it! He is right—I do struggle with saying things I should not have said. I am glad to say that I can thank God that He has taught me to keep my mouth closed a little more!! I have had many women tell me more than I wanted or needed to know about their husbands. Yes there are confidences shared when counseling or praying with a friend with a burden or struggle. But casual, disparaging remarks about a husband is in reality being unfaithful to him. “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” (Proverbs 31:11)

In the Name of God, I, Claudia take you, Harris, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow.

Just typing these vows makes me want to shout, GREAT IS HIS FAITHFULNESS!!! Sometimes in these past forty years we have literally held each other through deep valleys and almost overwhelming grief. Maybe not as much as some couples experience, but enough to know that we have always come out of those dark valleys with a deeper love for each other and our Lord. In 1986 both Harris and I came to the realization that having minors in Christianity and being what my mother-in-law called “good church workers” was not enough. We had both been baptized as children and had regularly attended church and been involved in teaching Bible school and serving on various committees. We were both convicted within months of each other that we had never totally surrendered to the Lord.  What a transformation in our lives and the lives of our children. He led us in paths that were life-changing for all of us. Those years of teaching our children and working together to build firm foundations for them were some of the richest days of our marriage.

When I vowed before God to have and to hold in sickness and in health I blithely thought of the flu and sprained ankles. But we have been through those dark paths of bedside vigils of sick children, hospital stays that seemed to never end for two of our children, miscarriages and the deaths of the dearest of our friends.  Many of the couples that we have known over these forty years are now divorced. In these later years our parents have all gone to be with Jesus. We have lived in abundance and with a tightened budget. We have survived cancer and cancer surgery and radiation therapy. As a young bride I could never have imagined any of the deep wells of joy and grief that would enter our lives but neither could I have imagined the love that Harris and I have. I did love him when I married him but it was an untested love. No storm, disease, death, heartbreak, loss or disappointment has ever undermined our relationship. On the contrary our marriage has grown stronger through every trial we have had.

Nor could I as a 20 year-old bride ever have dreamed of the great joys that would come into our lives. Our Lanier, Elizabeth and Zachary are the sweetest blessings that the Lord has given us. Harris poured himself into investing in the lives of our children. He drank thousands of cups of tea with our girls, watched every Jane Austen movie, all of the Avonlea series and Anne. He showed them their great worth and value as young women. He played basketball, tennis, golf, hiked, fished—whatever Zachary was interested in. Not one of them ever touched the piano without having him as a listener. He praised them as well as corrected them when needed. They always knew they could talk over any issue or problem with him. He has been a counselor and confidante for them as well as for me. All these years I have had absolute trust that my husband would take care of me and protect me. He values my counsel and I need his wisdom. We are each other’s best friend and confidante.

Everyone that knows me knows how I revere Shakespeare and these lines from Sonnet CXVI really express what it is like to live and love together for forty years:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is never shaken…

I do not like to think much about the last line of my vows: “till death do us part”. It is a reality, but we are married and we will be until that time. It is a reality that makes me a very blessed wife.

P.S. And the “obey” part of my vows…Harris is noble and romantic so that was never an issue!

As Ashleigh and I were both celebrating such milestone anniversaries this year, and as our weddings were exactly five years and one day apart, we thought it would be special to post a series on our wedding days and the journeys we’ve taken since. Part One is here. And look out later this week for a very special forty-year perspective in Part Three!

Ten years ago, on a Sunday afternoon in June, I stood at the church doors, one hand resting on my Daddy’s arm, the other clutching my bouquet of sweet peas and gardenias. I remember how the petals trembled under the waves of joy that crested and broke over me as I watched my pretty maids in their pale pink gowns all walk so solemnly down the aisle ahead, preparing the way with a joy of their own. Then the great congregational hymn, the loved ones and friends filling the sanctuary with a triumph of praise to our Lord who had been so good to us. And on the last verse, I knew, even if I couldn’t see it, my beloved would be walking out from a side door with his groomsmen and the pastor that was to unite us before God and men in holy matrimony.

And suddenly, dreamlike, it was my turn. The doors opened at the touch of unseen hands, the strains of the Handel aria I had selected as a special surprise for Philip soared around me, and together, Daddy and I stepped into the church. It was filled to capacity—either the sanctuary didn’t hold the 500 people that the church administrator had promised it would, or there were many more people there than we had expected. Whichever way, it was a sea of loving, smiling faces that greeted me that day, all beaming with a happiness that is so tender and tremendous for me to consider, even all these years later. But of all that beloved throng, I saw only one face. Shining out from all the rest, so handsome in his morning coat with a gardenia in his buttonhole, smiling back at me with a joy that made me want to break into a run. Philip—my groom.

Everything was as I had always dreamed it would be—my mother almost single-handedly saw to that. From the urns of roses and the garlands of smilax that graced the altar, to the sweet little cones on the pews holding the offerings of friends’ summer gardens, the church was a picture. The morning’s rain that had threatened our outdoor reception had gone to its own place and the June sunlight pouring in at the tall windows was like a benediction. Each member of our wedding party had played such an important and valued role in our lives, and they had flown in from literally all over the world—Australia, Poland, France. The man that married us was the man that led my Daddy to Christ; the dress I wore had been worn by my mother and my grandmother before me. Every detail was fraught with meaning and significance and we were humbled, overwhelmed, by the loving support that had brought us to this place and this time.

But in that instant, timeless in its lucidity and standing out from all the blissful haze of that precious day, the only thing that mattered was that Philip and I were going to be man and wife at the end of it all. Each step brought me closer to the desire of my heart; each moment that passed was one less of a solitary journey. I received my Daddy’s kiss and heard him give me away; I passed my flowers to my sister and placed my hand in Philip’s. I heard our minister begin the recitation of the lovely old vows from the Book of Common Prayer and I repeated them back with all my heart. Friends later teased us over the brevity of our ceremony—any guest a quarter-of-an-hour late would have missed the wedding altogether. But we had one object, two-fold in its implication: to be married; and to lift up our Lord Christ who had brought us together into a union we had hardly dared to dream of.

That done, to simplicity and joy, we were off to our reception at the farmhouse that was to be our home when we returned from our honeymoon—the home that Philip had worked so hard to prepare for me from the day he placed his engagement ring on my finger five short months previous. When we pulled in the driveway the policeman directing traffic informed us that the pastures were full and that no more cars would be permitted. That until I leaned forward with a sly smile and a wave and he broke into a laugh and ushered us in—to our reception and our new life together.

My mother-in-law was more gracious. She met us on the front walk as we bustled out of the car.

“Welcome home!” she cried with a radiant smile.

And I wondered if any bride had ever had a happier homecoming.

This June I’ve been wandering around the yard, looking at the roses we’d planted and the trees under which the white and green tents were pitched; at the vine-covered trellis Philip built specifically for us to enter our reception beneath and the wide expanse of lawn that had been trampled by the feet of dancers in the Virginia Reel and Marie’s Wedding. The back porch where the fiddler stood and the front porch where friends had served lemonade from a frosty silver bowl. The perennial garden my mother helped me plant. The stone steps where I stood to pitch my bouquet into my sister’s willing hands, and the stone walkway lined with dear ones down which we raced back to our car in a pelting flurry of lavender.

“Ten years??” my heart keeps demanding. “How could it have been ten years?”

It just doesn’t seem possible that a decade has passed since our wedding day. That we’ve reached such a milestone and that ten years of long talks and lingering dinners and breakfasts on the fly and books read and rooms renovated and dreams dreamed lay between that day and this. Journeys abroad and blissful homecomings; rooms full of friends and silent Sunday afternoons; tears dried and laughter uncontrollable. I just can’t believe it. But even more amazing to me is the thought that there ever was a time that we weren’t married. That idea strikes me as almost ridiculous—and has with impartial force on every single anniversary we’ve celebrated. I can’t believe it’s been that long; I can’t believe it’s been only that long. Emily Dickinson says it well:

How odd the Girl’s life looks
Behind this soft Eclipse—
I think that Earth feels so
To folks in Heaven—now—

So what great insight can I offer after ten years of marriage? What pearl stands out from the others as I cast my mind and heart back over all that these beautiful years have meant? What hard-earned truth is mine, wrested from the quarry of experience?

Above all, only this: that I am utterly undeserving of the least part of it. The love that my Philip shows me–that has characterized and sanctified my married life from that day until this–flows from the very heart of Christ Himself. As Christ loved the Church—he has lived it out. It is unconditional and unremitting and unstinting—and this from the man that knows me better than anyone else on earth! How can it be that he could look into the soul of this sinner and still grow tender-eyed? How could he truly know me, in all my weaknesses and vanities, and still greet me with joy at the end of each day? How could he forgive with such abandon and love so lavishly? I do believe, after a decade of such day-in and day-out constancy that Love is the most humbling thing that could ever happen to a person. If I was overwhelmed on my wedding day by the outpourings of family and friends and the sight of my groom waiting for me at the altar, then I am speechless today. Words, my old and trusted friends, have forsaken me utterly and I can only stand upon this precious milestone with a heart full of love and gratefulness. To my husband, and to our faithful God who joined us as one.

Allow me, in my incapacity, to borrow from the poets once more: lines penned in praise of the believer’s relation to Christ, but no less applicable to the earthly union that is an image of the heavenly one:

Love bade me welcome, yet my soul drew back,
Guilty of dust and sin.
But quick-ey’d Love, observing me grow slack
From my first entrance in,
Drew nearer to me, sweetly questioning
If I lack’d anything.
George Herbert

A marriage made in heaven? Absolutely. A gift of God before which we both stand in awe. As our minister reminded us before we were married, the very best matches are those in which each partner believes that they have gotten the better part of the deal. After ten years I know that I have. But it’s a deal of mutual wonder and joy, undimmed by a decade of loving and being loved. It truly only gets sweeter–and more beautiful–with each year that passes.

Thanks be to God.

June 27, 1999

~Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

Five years ago today I was standing in a church, facing the man I loved with all my heart, vowing, covenanting to love him, honor him, obey him, and be faithful to him until death. We stood hand in hand on the platform, with so many dear ones watching, knowing this was the start of forever for the two of us.

But this wasn’t exactly how it was planned. Oh no, we weren’t supposed to be in that church at that particular moment. If you had asked us the day before, or even that morning, we’d have told you we’d be joining our lives before God that day in a breathtaking outdoor setting, with a back drop of snow-capped mountains, shining lake waters, surrounded by majestic pine trees. But God, in His wisdom, had other plans.

It started the evening before the wedding, with the rehearsal dinner. Being that my beloved and I are outdoorsy kind of people, his parents had suggested doing a barbecue in their Rocky Mountain backyard, as opposed to dinner at a fancy restaurant. It was just more “us.” The plans were made, the tables, chairs and decorations set. And then… the clouds rolled in. With thunder. And lightning. And rain. And hail. Our family and wedding party rushed for cover into the house… and began to talk about what we’d do the next day for our 1:45 pm wedding. Surely, we told ourselves, surely, after all this planning, the rain would hold off. It just had to be clear. Surely.

Yet, the next afternoon, forty-five minutes after the wedding had been scheduled to start at the lake, our guests filed into the church auditorium from where they’d all been squeezed in the foyer to keep out of the hail. The storm, which had returned with even greater fury than the night before,  had driven us from the lakeside just minutes before the ceremony was supposed to begin. While guests caravaned the short drive from one place to the other, my sweet bridesmaids and everyone else who was close enough to help–all in full wedding attire!–pulled out vacuums, transferred the decorations as they arrived in cars from the lake, and did everything they could to calm my rather shaken nerves.

My beloved called my cell phone many times in the course of the location switch, making sure I was alright. “Just remember,” John told me, over and over. “Today is STILL our wedding day. You are my bride no matter what. By the end of today, we’ll still be husband and wife.”

Five years later, I sit here, several states away from that wedding site, smiling to myself over the way the day turned out. We didn’t have the outdoor wedding I’d spent so many months planning, but we did get married. We didn’t get to take the wedding pictures near the Colorado lakes and streams and mountains that the “photographer papers” we wrote out said we would, but we do have pictures radiating our love and joy that day. Fancy dresses may have been a bit wrinkled and tux coats set aside until the last minute, but we were shown by every single person around us that day just how much we were loved and how blessed we were to have such dear ones in our lives.

If there was one life lesson that has seemed to characterize our marriage these five years, it’s the fact that “nothing is certain except change itself.”  Things seem to change in drastic ways around here, sometimes faster than our minds can even process. And yet, through every change, we come to the end of each day still as bride and bridegroom. At five years, a milestone when many couples are evaluating their relationship and whether it’s worth staying together, we can say without hesitancy that the many changes and curve balls our first five years have brought have only served to cement us even closer, stronger, and with more reliance on the God who joined us. The people who surrounded us that very first day remind us by their example and with their current presence in our lives of the covenant we made, the support we have through every step, and have shown us that true Christlike love gives, serves… and is flexible.

Things don’t always happen exactly as we planned them. Dinner doesn’t always turn out, husbands come home late or change schedules, jobs are lost and gained, moves can happen at a moment’s notice, babies don’t arrive when we expect, family troubles can threaten marriage bonds, children don’t always behave the way we want when we want, illnesses take our health, and a thousand other changes can send stormy weather in the direction of a husband and wife.  But that’s okay. At the end of it all–and perhaps because of it all–we still look into each others’ eyes and see sparkles. We can still kiss under the stars and be amazed that we have each other. We can laugh until our sides ache, sleep snuggled close every night (and go to bed at the same time!), and play footsies under a dinner table surrounded by our little ones. My husband still wraps his arms around my waist and buries his head in my hair while I make dinner, steals kisses whenever he walks by, and catches my eye from across a crowded room for a look that only I can catch. I think the fact that he makes me a cup of coffee every morning, selecting the cups I like best (like my “Marine Wife and Proud of It!” mug!), blending the cream and sugar perfectly, and bringing it upstairs to wake me with a kiss–just as he did every morning of our honeymoon–qualifies us as the perpetual honeymooners we are.

When we stood in that church on June 26, 2004, we didn’t know what was ahead for us. We couldn’t hope to foresee the particular challenges we’d face or what our life together would look like, any more than we can see what the years ahead will be. But we did know one thing–we would be facing all of it as best friends and with the Jesus who brought us together. And if this first day was any indication, we’d be learning to be flexible!

These foundational, strengthening truths we’ve been learning every one of the 1,826 days we’ve been man and wife are the ones we trust our Lord will be continuing to refine and perfect through the decades ahead of us. After all, He got started on the very first day in June.

“Two families. A large backyard. Nine cousins with a big dream. Four years ago, this was all they had. Today, the film ‘Pendragon’ is a testimony of God fulfilling their dream in ways that they never imagined.”

So YLCF reader Sarah Ferraro sums up the story of the Burns Family Studios‘ movie “Pendragon.”  I had a chance to get a bit more “behind the scenes” with Marilyn Burns, homeschool graduate and leading actress in the movie “Pendragon” in a recent interview…

Gretchen: When you’re not acting in period movies, what is the thing you like most to do?

Marilyn: Wow, that’s a hard one.  I love to do so many different things!  Music is definitely one of them…  I also love reading and writing, and just about any kind of creative art, really – I love the process of imagining something and making it come to life with my hands.

Gretchen: How have you been able to use your musical gifts to God’s glory?

Marilyn: I am actually just finishing up a music degree this semester, and I love to play the piano and violin.  Music is always an incredible way to worship our awesome God, and to share his love with others… whether that means gathering to sing in our home, playing at a nursing home, or as part of a church service (or working on a film score!).  Aaron and I had a really incredible opportunity last summer to be part of a missions outreach in the Alaskan mountains.  The village children were fascinated with our instruments, and loved singing along to the worship songs we taught them – it was a really incredible experience, and I am so thankful that God gave us that opportunity!

Gretchen: Tell us what it’s like to have your family create a movie.  How did you know it was more than just something you had fun with, but something God wanted you to do?

Marilyn: That was a hard one for me, to be honest – especially in the middle of the project.  Filmmaking is never easy or comfortable, but it was always fun to be a “princess” – what girl wouldn’t want to do that?  There were so many other opportunities, though, things that I thought God wanted me doing – finishing school, serving at church – it was hard to balance everything.  The part that made me most sure God wanted me right where I was were all the opportunities to encourage others through the project.  It’s been amazing to hear how the final movie has been a blessing to so many people, and even in the process, I’ve had so many opportunities to reach out to other girls – it’s been incredible!

Gretchen: In the movie “Pendragon” you play the king’s daughter, Wenneveria.  What was the message you wanted most to convey as you acted out the part of Wenneveria?

Marilyn: Well, of course, the character Wenneveria is meant to support the message of the entire film – to encourage our audience to embrace the vision God has for their lives.  But I think she is a specific encouragement to girls – her trust in God, her patience and hard work, and (although she once betrays his trust) her commitment to Artos and his vision.  Also, there is a beautiful relationship between Wenneveria and her father – it was a really special memory to play this part with my dad, and I hope it can be an encouragement to other girls as well.

Gretchen: What did all the costuming, makeup, hairstyling, and acting in this movie teach you about beauty?

Marilyn: Hmm… That’s a good question.  It was a lot of fun designing the costumes for each person, trying to make their character come through in the way they appear on screen.  I guess you could say that was the greatest lesson.  Your appearance, the way you present yourself, reveals a lot about who you are, and who you want to be.

Gretchen: What would you say to other girls who are interested in acting in small Christian films?

Marilyn: It’s a lot of work!  Be prepared to be cheerful, even when you’re working hard and long and late… but it is a lot of fun too.   It gives you many great opportunities to be an example for Christ, which makes everything worth it.

For more information, visit the Burns Family Studios website or order straight from Christian Book Distributors.  But before you go…we have a copy of “Pendragon” to give away to one of you, the YLCF readers!  See official entry rules below.

“‘Pendragon’ is a thrilling drama set in the Dark Ages. It tells the story of Artos, a young man, determined to fulfill his father’s dying vision and free a people from tyranny.  This film is a challenge to never give up, no matter the obstacles, but to work to accomplish the vision that God has given you. Throughout ‘Pendragon’ we follow Artos, as he faces slavery, betrayal, false accusations, and even the sword, in man’s attempts to thwart him from achieving his father’s vision. In the end, God gives Artos the strength to persevere and ultimately accomplish what God called him to do.   From my dad to my 2-year old brother, this is our family’s favorite film (though my younger siblings do not watch the intense scenes of burning villages, etc.).”

-YLCF Reader Sarah Ferraro

Official YLCF Giveaway Entry Rules:

• To enter the drawing, please comment on this post with the title of your favorite family movie.
• Don’t forget to include your name and email address in the space provided (your email address will not be published, but we need a way to contact you if you win!).
• This drawing open to readers with U.S. mailing addresses only, please.
• Drawing ends Sunday, June 29, 2009 at midnight.
• Winner will be chosen randomly and notified by email.

P.S. Congratulations to Hannah and Susanna and family–winners of YLCF’s “Pendragon” giveaway!

Set-Apart Femininity is not a book that makes the reader comfortable.  But the message rings true when compared to God’s Word.

Unlike Leslie Ludy’s first book for girls, Authentic Beauty-which, while I wholeheartedly agreed with its premise, I felt gave too many graphic examples of impurity in a book about purity-Set-Apart Femininity goes straight to the heart of the message.

Leslie’s question is this: “Is Jesus Christ merely a part of your life?  Or is He your entire life?“ (pg. 96).  Using unforgettable stories of women like Sabina Wurmbrand, Leslie shows clearly how far our typical Christian lives are from being set apart for Him.  The chapter on decorum is filled with questions to help you evaluate how you spend your time, who and what really has a claim on your life.

The book is worth buying just for the chapter on the design of beauty.  Leslie cuts straight to the heart of today’s popular message for Christian women on self-worth and beauty, showing it for the self-centered ugliness it is.  Yes, she agrees, our feminine desire is to be found beautiful, to be that princess we always dreamed of:

“But the solution presented, all too often, does not flow from the true Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Why?  Because it keeps self alive.  It convinces us that we can look inward and find worth, beauty, and value within ourselves.  It keeps the focus on us; on our feelings, our attributes, and our beauty…

“It is not our unique beauty that must shine for this world to see.  It is not our own beauty that we must discover and embrace-it is His… The secret to becoming the beautiful…princess…is forgetting all about self and becoming completely consumed with only one thing-Jesus Christ.” (pg. 45, 47)

And then there’s the chapter on prayer-on cultivating a real, vibrant, every-moment relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  Leslie makes a clear case that “our problem is not that we expect too much of God, but that we expect far too little of Him” (pg. 128).  Rather convicting when coupled with Leslie’s description of the abundant hope and life we can and should have in Him: “Not day to day surviving, but day to day thriving” (pg. 127).

Of course, the book wouldn’t be written by a Ludy without some great stuff on romance and guy-girl relationships.  Like about how our generation doesn’t need lower expectations of marriage, but higher ones.  (And I can only say amen to that!  Watch for my review of The First 90 Days of Marriage, which is the Ludy’s entire book about that very subject.)  But Leslie brings our thoughts of ardor and mystique back to the center of where they should be with this:

“If you ever catch yourself ‘putting off’ happiness until you finally get married or thinking that when you finally meet your spouse all of your dreams will be fulfilled, that’s a sign that Christ hasn’t fully captured your heart.  If Jesus Christ isn’t enough right now, then He won’t be enough after marriage either.  And you’ll always be seeking fulfillment from the wrong things-setting your marriage up for disillusionment and tension.” (pg. 185)

If you really read it, Set-Apart Femininity can challenge to the core the way you live your life.  It doesn’t take a very long look around to see that we need Christians to live up to their name now, more than ever.  As another favorite author of mine, Josh Harris, always used to say: “This country will not survive another generation of Christians that fit in.”

The only way to be a part of the counter culture is to be set apart.  The only way to be truly feminine is to be set apart.  The only way to be a radiant princess, a daughter of the King, a child of God is to be set apart.

Read Set-Apart Femininity.  Visit setapartgirl.com.  And together, let’s live set apart lives for Him.

P.S. Congratulations to Leslie and her husband on the Father’s Day arrival of their newest little girl…another one to be set apart for Him!

It didn’t take long for it to become busy. My sister and I ran down to grab something to eat, and by the time we got back, the girls were gathering in the bridal suite to get ready, and it seemed like my phone began to ring and I began to wonder as time went on, if I would manage to be ready in time, or if I, too, would be just another bride late to her wedding ceremony.

But I put on that dress, that beautiful white dress, the most expensive and fancy I’ll ever wear in my life, and I was ready to go to my groom- on time.

There were pictures first, and then the dash from the car to the basement of the little white church in Asotin, and the ceremony began.

I had seen many of my friends marry, and I had the privilege of standing up with three of those girls as they joined their life with the man they loved, and I had tried to soothe nervous jitters, wiped away tears, and watched one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen- the face of a bride as she walks towards her man. I’d laughed and cried through those days. Laughed, because they were the happiest days, and cried because they were the most beautiful, touching moments I’d ever shared, and then I wondered, as I saw the face of a dear friend, glowingly radiant, and caught a little of their happiness and tucked it away in my heart, how could one ever truly describe a day like this?

I was not nervous, and I didn’t cry as I walked down the aisle, but from the time I stepped around that corner and saw the face of my beloved, I heard and saw little else. The music that was playing, the faces of family and friends, the wedding party- I couldn’t tell you anything about them at that moment. All I saw was Scott’s face, and that was all that mattered as a million emotions surged through my heart, and must have been written on my face.

But there we were. Together, joining our lives. It was the beginning of our happily ever after, and it was beautiful.

My brother’s talk was good, and the music was wonderful, once I started hearing it again. The church was full- full of the people we loved, and the decoration was simple, yet perfect for us. The bridesmatrons, my beautiful sisters, looked so pretty, and the groomsmen were handsome the western-ish touches in their outfits. My cousin Steven, and Gretchen’s little Ruth Ann being pulled in the wagon, made an adorable “Wagon Man” and Flower girl, and Suzuki’s “The Happy Farmer” certainly added the right touch to their appearance down the aisle.

Our reception was great too-  the amazingly beautiful cake,  that song I’ve always loved, “Grow Old Along With Me”, and the story that led to our own little game  we started during courtship (SILUM!), and best of all the presentation of the 12 stuffed cows to my parents, the playful fulfillment of a talk Scott and Dad had before our engagement. The expressions and that moment were priceless.

Three months have slipped by since I was a bride, but the happiness remains, and the love that was so deep then, only grows deeper. It gets better every day. I pray that it always will. It’s something that must be a way of life, a choice each day, something that we each must guard as a treasure worth more than life. And, by God’s grace, that beginning of happiness will indeed be just the opening chapter in our Happily Ever After… forever.

P.S. You can see some of the pictures of our day here and here.

The Lord spoke to my heart a while back concerning the bare trees and my time of waiting. I had quietly noted within myself how drab and unlovely the trees were looking during the winter months and was contemplating it all and feeling quite sorry for them and myself when all of a sudden the Lord reminded me how this is the season that He has chosen for them and how during this time they wait patiently for the coming and promised spring.

This made me think… and in all truth I have never, in all my life, heard a tree complaining about its lack of leaves, or its apparent bareness of fruit at the moment, or even seen a tree trying to uproot itself and run to ‘better’ lands or ‘nicer’ climates. No. But I have seen the trees stand faithful in the place where God has put them, and continue to grow and stay rooted until the season when He grants them their covering and fruit. They do not fret in the gray and hard seasons, nor do they give up and just uproot. They stand tall and faithful, and quietly wait for His timing, for His beauty and for His great grace.

There is great beauty in not only blooming where we are planted, but also in being content and waiting faithfully and standing tall in Him when our blooms have yet to appear. Now I look at the bare trees all around and think to myself how really beautiful they are!

Though the fig tree may not blossom,
nor fruit be on the vines;
though the labor of the olive may fail,
and the fields yield no food;
though the flock may be cut off from the fold,
and there be no herd in the stalls-
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will joy in the God of my salvation.
The Lord is my strength;He will make my feet like deer’s feet,
and He will make me walk on my high hills.
-Habakkuk 3:17-19

I stopped him. “Why? Why are you sorry for asking for a snack? You’ve worked hard and you’re hungry?”

“I said I’m sorry because of the look on your face. You looked very sad when I asked you,” he confessed.

And that’s when it dawned on me. My little boy apologizes for me, not to me. My actions, the look on my face, my tone, made him feel like he had wronged me in some way.

Gulp.

Please take a moment to read the rest of the post here. You’ll be challenged and encouraged!

It was the summer before I turned 13.  The summer before I met Merritt.  The summer my world changed from that of a little girl to a teenager.  It was the summer I read His Perfect Faithfulness by Eric and Leslie Ludy.

All I knew about dating was what I observed from afar in the church youth group.  I didn’t think I wanted any part of it.  And I never could picture being on the stereotypical first date with a guy I hardly knew.  In the story of Eric and Leslie’s courtship, I saw a better way, a way I wanted for myself.  And in the style of that first generation of those who believed in courtship, I paved my path with good intentions and extremes.

In my search for standards that were desperately needed, I embraced legalism.  I confused modesty with extreme frumpiness, and my better than thou attitude about my apparel stood between me and many a friendship.  I wore my purity like a badge on my arm instead of as a quiet covenant of my heart.  I had my life all figured out at thirteen-except I put God in a box and left my future husband’s thoughts out of the picture entirely.

My romantic, almost-thirteen-year-old heart was enraptured by the story of Eric and Leslie saving their first kiss (with each other) for their wedding day.  It sounded beautiful, romantic, perfect.  I knew right then and there that is what I would do.  But I did not just quietly embrace the commitment to a higher standard of purity than what I saw around me; I made sure I told everyone that I was saving my first kiss for my husband.  I did more than just draw the line in the sand for myself; I thought everyone else should as well.

It would take many years to learn that there is a difference in saving your first kiss for your husband and saving your first kiss for your wedding day (which I viewed then as one and the same).  It would take a lot of conviction on the part of the Holy Spirit to see how I made the issue one of pride, not purity.  And it would take even more years before I felt like I could share my story with others without fear of what they would say (even more pride).

But I have a little sister who is thirteen years old.  And for my little sister and the countless others like her, I write this.  So that you won’t make the same mistakes I did.  So that you will embrace a high standard of purity without becoming prideful.

That summer when I read Eric and Leslie Ludy’s book I little guessed I would soon be meeting my future husband.  I had no idea the affectionate, godly man he would be.  Or how he would shake my every conviction to the core.  Not because he was a wild, rebellious boy-but because he was a godly one.  Not because he thought my convictions were all bad-but because he wanted to know where they were in the Bible.  Not because he led me down the wrong path-but because he challenged me to look at my extra-biblical rules for what they were.

“I have found that a man will usually be as much of a gentleman as a lady requires and probably no more.”
-Elisabeth Elliot

I adhered to the idea that I had to draw the line of purity or else I’d be taken advantage of.  And in my interactions with other guys, I was only too thankful to be labeled “untouchable“!  But I had yet to learn about submission to the leadership of the man who would be my husband.  Or letting the man lead and guide the relationship.

When I finally realized what I was doing, that the only reason I was not letting the man I was going to marry kiss me was because of my pride, that in fact I was not showing him love as I could and should be at that point in our courtship-I let him kiss me.  And my only regret was that I had insisted on doing it my way for so long and hadn’t let him do it in his time and way to begin with.

I’ve been to weddings where the couple made such a big deal out of the fact that it was their first kiss and did so much kissing that it was awkward for everyone there.  I’ve been to weddings where that first tender kiss, displayed for hundreds of pairs of eyes, is nothing but sweet, tender, and rather embarrassed.  Personally, I’m rather glad our first kiss wasn’t in front of all those people.  But I wholeheartedly applaud those couples who wait until the preacher says, “You may now kiss the bride.”  They probably saved themselves a lot of difficulty during their courtship by drawing that line.

But as Josh Harris has always said, purity is more than just a line in the sand.  You can be very impure in thought and attitude without your lips ever touching.  Just as you can share kisses without sinning.  You have not lost your purity if you’ve kissed someone.  But if you save that first pure, innocent kiss to give to the man whom you get to spend the rest of your life kissing, you’ll save a lot of heartache, and give him an incredible gift.

“Kissing is a means of getting two people so close together that they can’t see anything wrong with each other.”
-Gene Yasenak

As I tell my little sister, watch “Pamela’s Prayer“, read The Princess and the Kiss, read Eric and Leslie’s story and the other stories like theirs.  They will remind you of all the reasons you are saving your kisses for the man you’re going to marry.  And if he or you or your parents want you to wait until your wedding day to be sure that it’s your husband you’re kissing, do it.  Just as a hands-off courtship makes it much easier to know you are making the right decision, without too much emotion involved, keeping your lips to yourself will make it easier to maintain a heart and standard of purity.  I don’t recommend kissing for long courtships or in situations where couples see each other each and every day-it’s asking for trouble!  But if he wants to kiss you when you’re engaged, let him!

“I married the first man I ever kissed.  When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.”
-Barbara Bush

That first date I could never quite imagine finally came not too many months before my wedding day.  With a man who was already my very best friend.  There was nothing awkward about the way we enjoyed our cream of broccoli soup and gourmet entrées.  It was the most delightful first date.  And, true to all the stereotypical first date stories, he kissed me afterwards as we stood on the porch steps in the sunset.

If you can’t trust the man enough to let him kiss you, then by all means, don’t even kiss him goodbye-run the opposite direction.  But if he’s a man worth marrying, he won’t even try to kiss you until he knows you are ready to be kissed, until he’s committed to marrying you.  I’ll never forget the way Merritt looked at me one time as he kissed me, and said in a way that spoke volumes, “I would never do anything to hurt my best friend.”  I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that was true.  Which is why then, and now, I feel incredibly safe in his arms.

And the kiss on our wedding day?  It must have been pretty wonderful, too.  We’d planned for my cousin to ring the antique bell in the church steeple as we kissed.  I asked Merritt later, “Did they remember to ring the bell?”  He looked at me and grinned.  Apparently, his brand new wife had been so distracted by that kiss she never heard the bell ringing.

But more and more, I realize how much of myself I am seeing in her.  She learns by emulating me.  She gets excited beyond measure as Daddy’s homecoming approaches.  She needs measuring cups to “cook” with each time I get out a measuring cup.  She lines her recent Valentine cards up along the back of the couch just like my Hallmark cards from her daddy are lined up on the headboard of our bed.  She observed me rubbing her daddy’s sore leg and now does it of her own intiative.  I even mentioned to her that I was going to do the laundry, and before I knew it she was taking clothes out of the hamper for me.

Sometimes her actions catch me up short, however.  During a recent bout with a cold I was left with no voice.  To catch Ruth’s attention when she was being naughty I took to waving my hand back and forth and shaking my head “no.”  Suddenly she was using that as her own sign language for “no,” and now tells us “no” quite readily whether it’s “no, I’m not ready for bed” or “no, I don’t want milk”–by waving her hand back and forth, just like mommy did.

There’s nothing like having children to make one take a look in the mirror.  Am I always acting just like I want my daughter to?  Lord, give me wisdom…

The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease,
For His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.
-Lamentations 3:22, 23

Every day is a new day. Each sunrise is a fresh start and a renewed opportunity to begin again. It is a time to learn from the mistakes of yesterday and with Christ’s help move on from them as we take a step closer to being transformed into His likeness.

Sadly, however, so many of us are too caught up in the regrets and happenings of yesterday, or the worries and fears for tomorrow. We allow our pasts to torment us and our looming futures to scare us. As a result, we often miss out on our gift of the present.

Jesus does not want us to be bound up or afraid. He came to set us free from captivity. Every wrong that we have committed, or will commit, He died so that it can be forgiven and forgotten by His blood shed at the cross. When we give our lives to Jesus, He forgives us and takes our wrongs away and carries them upon Himself.  He made a way for us to be set free from sin, so we would not have to be tormented anymore, because we could be forgiven. Psalm 103:12 states, “As far as the east is from the west, so far has He put our sins from us.”

Another thing that prevents us from enjoying today is the prospect of tomorrow. In Matthew 6:25-34, Jesus tells us not to be afraid. He is all-knowing. He knows the future; it is in His hands. What will it gain us to worry about days that have not yet come to be, and things that may or may not happen? We need to live in today.

In the midst of it all, past, present and future, there is a timeless God, Who holds it all together.  Brother Yun says in his book, The Heavenly Man, “I do not know what the future holds but I do know Who holds my future.” We need to let go and surrender our yesterdays and tomorrows to the Lord and focus on living for Jesus and serving Him today.

Today is a new day. Let’s take advantage of it and live it for the Lord.

Last Saturday, I watched as my cousin Brian slipped a ring on his new bride’s finger. The pictures in their slide show coordinated perfectly with the lyrics of the new Country song by Heartland, “I Loved Her First.” And as the vocalists sang Newsong’s “When God Made You,” we all rejoiced together with Brian and Jordyn.

My cousins make such handsome grooms. Brian is the third of my cousins to get married in the past few years. It is so exciting to see each one find the wife God made just for him.

I got Brian and Jordyn a funny card. Having just recently opened a mound of wedding cards, I knew they’d appreciate the humorous break in the midst of the pile of congratulations.

What I wrote in their card was different from what I might have a year ago, as well. Gone were the cousinly bits of advice. Seven months of marriage have taught me that I will never be finished learning how to better love my husband. Any bits of wisdom I might previously have tried to pass on, I now know they must learn for themselves.

No one can make you always put your husband first just by telling you-you must learn it by daily practice. There is no textbook perfect way to balance keeping the house clean, the meals warm, and your husband happy-you have to learn it for yourself, by learning exactly what your husband deems most important. And as my husband would testify, no one can explain to you how to understand your wife-it is something only time can teach you (I’m sure he would add, “if ever”, but in 7 months he has come to know me better than I know myself).

So what could I say to my newlywed cousins? Only this. That I prayed they might find as much happiness together as we have.

And truly, I could wish them no better than to be as happy as we are.

LOOK UP

Along with a lightning-fast pain reflex designed to move me away from danger, I’m convinced that God has given me a worry reflex designed to rivet my attention on Him.

A.W. Tozer says, “Faith is the gaze of a soul upon a saving God.”

It reminds me of that wonderful one-word Psalm I found in a name-list in Chronicles:

Elioenai: “toward Jah are my eyes”

While in the grip of stress or some other strong emotion, do you ever feel like you’ve run into a very tall, smooth wall when you try to pray? Sometimes I do, and then I stand there feeling puzzled. But now…

I can just look up.

“We have no might…neither know we what to do, but our eyes are on You.”

I saw God wash the world last night
with His sweet showers on high,
and then, when morning came, I saw
Him hang it out to dry.

He washed each tiny blade of grass
and every trembling tree;
He flung His showers against the hill,
and swept the billowing sea.

The white rose is a cleaner white,
the red rose is more red,
since God washed every fragrant face
and put them all to bed.

There’s not a bird, there’s not a bee
that wings along the way
but is a cleaner bird and bee
than it was yesterday.

William L. Stidger
1885-1949

God washed my world last night. The rain drops were falling fast and the last rays of the sun lit them up against the darkened sky and the dark clouds looked even darker, but there was sunshine on the wet grass, sunshine on the birch trees, sunshine on my face, and sunshine turned those cold, gray water drops into drops of golden glory. Somewhere, not so very far away, there was a rainbow.

It was a moment that a camera could not truly capture, but I captured it in my heart. I went to bed with the rain dripping from the roof, and this morning there are tiny drops of water everywhere, just waiting to reflect the light of the morning sun and carry, each one, a picture of the new, fresh world, in their heart.

Today, the sun will shine again. Then all the golden dandelions will lift up their little faces to the sun, all the drops of water will glitter, and it will be beautiful- more beautiful than it was before.

Just like life, God uses “rain storms” to wash away the things in our hearts that shouldn’t be, and when the sun shines again, the heart songs are more joyful, the flowers of the heart- the ones God planted there, are even brighter there than they were if they had never known the rain, for if we know no rain, we cannot appreciate the sunshine, nor understand God’s love and care for us- in sunshine, and even more so in the rain.

If you find yourself walking today in the rain, remember that even in the rain, there is a rainbow. Embrace the rain, and know that tomorrow, the sun will shine again.

Photo by Chantel- “My World View” Spring 2009

Oh, I looked so perfect on the outside! Smooth and poised, and I would stay that way because my shell saw to that. And inside I was quite firm. I knew what I believed, and how a Christian should live. I was visiting my grandmother’s church with the purpose of worshiping God.

I eyed the front pew with distaste. Several teenagers were crowded into it, laughing and talking. Didn’t they know church isn’t merely a social gathering place? Why aren’t young people more committed to God? I thought, frustrated. They were certainly typical worldly, noisy teenagers. A boy with an earring, a girl with unnaturally orange-red hair, another girl wearing a shirt I wouldn’t be caught dead in, and several others. Of course they all sat together for more convenient flirting, I thought disdainfully. I’m glad I’m not like that!

The service began, and I joined in the singing and prayers. When it was time to greet each other, I stood there waiting. I was a visitor, so it was the church members’ duty to come to me. One of the first was the immodest girl from the front pew. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, was my thought, and my handshake was anything but hearty. But her smile was genuine. So was the voice that said, “Thank you for coming!”

During the sermon, I stole a glance at the teenagers again. No longer noisy, they were listening with rapt attention. Mr. Earring sat with bowed head, emotions playing on his young face. One girl glowed with joy. Another was nodding in understanding. They were like sponges, soaking in the life-giving words of truth that I let roll off my shell. Maybe I’m being a little too harsh, I admitted. Just because they don’t look like me doesn’t mean they are reprobates! Was that a hairline crack in my shell?

When the invitation was given, Mr. Earring went forward. Apparently a new Christian, he wanted to join the church. Tears welled up in my eyes as I saw his earnestness. The crack was widening, and God’s love began to seep in. For a moment I saw the person He saw in that young man. Sure, he had a long way to go. But so do I. And it’s only God’s grace that allowed me to have a godly upbringing.

Later that week Granny and another lady from her church were talking. My ears caught something about the young people on the front row. “I think it’s so wonderful,” Granny was saying, “the way they all come to church together. Since none of them have Christian parents, they support each other.”

“Yes,” agreed Mrs. Jackson. “And they sit on the front row so that they will pay attention to the sermon and not get distracted.”

Now I was truly ashamed of my former thoughts. How could I judge them when I had no idea what they faced? I hadn’t even bothered to pray for them. My shell broke completely, and to my surprise I found out I wasn’t as hard inside as I thought. God was able to transform a hard-boiled egg into . . . a sponge.

by Betsy Castleberry

The grass has turned green, tulips and daffodils are blooming, and the class of 2009 is graduating! My brother is among the graduate pictures on our refrigerator this year. It’s an exciting time, as you close a chapter and turn a new page, wondering what the next season of life will hold.

Yet with the graduating comes the age old question – “What are you going to do now?” Everyone asks you the same question, from friends and relatives to the cashier at the grocery store. It can be hard to know how to answer, especially for those of us who want to get married and don’t really desire a career.

You’ve finished high school, and now you move into the transition period between graduating and marriage. How should you use your time while you wait? It seems everyone but you knows exactly what you should do. You should go to college – you’re smart and should use your talent. Or you should get a job. How about a mission’s trip, or volunteer work? Maybe you should work in the home. It’s enough to leave your head spinning, but can I add my small word of advice?

Don’t do something simply because someone pressures you, or because you feel if you don’t decide on something the moment you graduate, you are wasting your time. It’s perfectly fine to graduate without knowing what you’re doing next. Isn’t that freeing? Why is it we want God to be on the world’s time line and to show us what we should do the day we turn eighteen? There is nothing wrong with telling everyone that you’re waiting for the Lord to give direction. It shows wisdom and a heart that truly wants the Lord’s will instead of satisfying the world.

Perhaps God has opened doors and shown the way ahead already, so that you know what you’ll be doing after you graduate. You may face opposition from people who don’t think you’re making the right choice, or try to persuade you otherwise. Yet if you truly feel God is leading you, follow Him with all your heart! I love what Chuck Swindoll says. “My job is not to defend or explain the will of God. My job is simply to obey it.” We don’t have to worry about others understanding or supporting us in what we do. If it’s His will, we simply obey.

“In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and His shall direct thy path.” (Proverbs 3:6) God blesses the heart that seeks to do His will.