Confucius Say. It’s ok to let a fool kiss you, but don’t let a kiss fool you

Confucius Say. A kiss is just shopping upstairs for downstairs merchandise

Confucius Say. It is better to lose a lover than love a loser

Confucius Say. Man with a broken condom is called a Daddy

Confucius Say. Man who mix Viagra and Ex-Lax, doesn’t know if he’s coming or going

Confucius Say. A drunken man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts

Confucius Say. Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, and you lose interest

Confucius Say. Viagra is like Disneyland… a one hour wait for a 2-minute ride

Confucius Say. It is much better to want the mate you do not have than to have the mate you do not want

Confucius Say. A joke is like sex. Neither is any good if you don’t get it

Sorry. Your joke for a President made me do it! I shall not circulate it in the U.S.A.

As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in
the seat next to him..

“No”, he says, “the seat is empty.”

“This is incredible!” said the man, “who in their right mind would have a
seat like this, the biggest golfing event of the whole world, and not use
it?”

He says, “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to
come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Masters we haven’t been
together since we got married.”

“Oh… I’m sorry to hear that. That’s terrible. I guess you couldn’t find
someone else?… a friend or relative or even a neighbour to take the seat?”

The man shakes his head…

….”No. They’re all at her funeral.”