Following the end of the UN conference on climate change, COP17 in Durban, South Africa, Michelle from the United States asks the Guru the best way forward to solve the world’s global warming crisis.

The Guru replies with deep wisdom, also communicating the Truth about the effectiveness of the COP meetings. Interpreters have also suggested that the Guru believes that the current path to global warming may be retarded somewhat, but not reversed. In later conversations with the Guru, he suggests ways in which the world can embrace the inevitable rather than get stressed about trying to prevent it. Basically, unless you own shares in swimsuit companies, it’s not looking too rosy.

If you’re looking to raise funds to prevent climate change or to buy shares in a swimsuit company, now might be a good time to try your hand at some of the best online casinos in India, the top online casinos worldwide, or pick your number at any of the many international lotto jackpots and buy lottery tickets online now. Perhaps that would give you enough funding to buy a much-needed giant air conditioning unit to combat global warming.

Bradley Carstens from Cape Town tells the Guru about his unhappiness because Blackberry’s BBM is not working. He goes on to ask why this is happening.

The Guru, in his response, shows his up-to-datedness with the times and provides Bradley with a deep and meaningful answer to think about.

If you are not a blackberry user and couldn’t care less if BBM is down right now, perhaps you should count yourself fortunate, and push your luck on the best online slots casino, a casino in India or go out and buy lottery tickets online now!

SP from the mountain kingdom of Lesotho asks the Guru why she cannot find a decent idea to follow through on. The Guru replies introducing the all important concept of timing. Sometimes no matter how hard one tries, if the timing isn’t quite right, nothing works out.

The question is always how can you make the most out of the situation you’re in? Perhaps, for now, a less decent idea may be more appropriate for you to follow through on – it may well be more decent than you expect.

If you’re looking for a different sort of idea to follow through on, perhaps now would be a good time to buy lottery tickets online – the Euromillions jackpot this week is sitting at over 100 Million Euro. As with all things, ease of follow-through largely determines whether you will do it or not… now how simple is buying a lottery ticket?

On a more serious note, if you’re battling to find your right idea or sustaining your motivation to pursue your goals, you may want to consider personal strategy coaching to help you get on track.

In a secret meeting at dusk, Colonel Muammar Gaddafi of Libya asks the Guru how he might survive the turmoil in the North African country. With most of the world – bar the likes of South Africa, already recognising the National Transitional Council (NTC), the colonel clearly has reason to be concerned.

The Guru replies, showing great insight into the human psyche. The turmoil we experience is only in our own minds.

Colonel Gaddafi makes the mistake of questioning The Guru without trying to understand the depth of his reply – he, as all others do, receives a rather uncomforting response he would have been happier not receiving.

Rumour has it that Muammar Gaddafi is planning to flee to Southern Malaysia to start up a chain of online casinos in India. If you know anything about this, kindly contact David Cameron immediately.

Karis from the Caribbean asks the Guru what she should do because her girlfriend thinks she is mean. The Guru shows his awareness of world trends, Kim Kardashian and Ozzy Osbourne with his response.

As with most decisions, only after you know what it is you want to achieve can you decide what is the best course of action.

And now a word from our sponsors: If, for example, you decide you would like to win the UK lottery from Trinidad, then the best course of action would likely be to first buy lottery tickets online in Trinidad. Our sponsors are in deep awe of the versatility of the Guru’s words.

Many of us wonder whether The Guru bothers himself with issues like taxation. Meady, from Trinidad & Tobago is no exception. She asked the Guru what he thought about the proposed Robin Hood tax.

The Guru, without any reference to tax manuals, immediately gives the most appropriate answer.

Sath24, from Trinidad & Tobago pondered long and hard about his question for the Guru. Finally, he asked when he would find a dirty bird.

The Guru replied with confidence.

For those of you who are not from a country that celebrates the carnival, J’Ouvert is one of the most unusual, colourful celebrations in the world.

In Trinidad, at 4am on the Monday before Ash Wednesday, J’Ouvert begins. It is a pre-dawn party involving masses of people walking the streets behind large music trucks. They smear themselves and each other with oil, water, mud, cocoa, paint, and more. If you’re an OCD clean freak, the party will likely be your worst nightmare realised.

A cute aspiring telepath asks The Guru how she might learn to read Julius Malema’s thoughts.

The Guru replies, demonstrating his vast knowledge of reading thoughts and also of the bovine kingdom.

For new readers, Julius Malema is a South African politician that recently had an altercation with the Guru. For details, see the Anger Management cartoon, to learn how Julius Malema was turned into a cow named Moolius Jalema.

As pre-election fever heats up in the USA, and on the back of USA’s first credit downgrade in history, American president Barack Obama makes the journey to ask the Guru about his prospects in the 2012 US elections.

The Guru, exhibiting a deep understanding of the mentality of the voting public, in America and elsewhere, answers wisely.

Sellinos asks The Guru why South Africa gave a loan of R2.4 Billion to an undemocratic Swaziland. The Guru dispels all speculation that South Africa gave the money because their government quite simply has already solved its own economics issues.

The Guru reinforces the notion that sharing is caring. As an addendum, the Guru wishes to remind you that people receive what they want, not what you think they need.

For those readers that have no clue where Swaziland is, please see the map below:

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