Web Watch by Web Gangsta

Flash Fun: Play THE IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ (parts 1 and 2)

web gangsta — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 00:00:05 +0000

Are you one of those people who wake up and approach each day saying, “Nothing is impossible”?

Like Alice, do you try to believe at least six impossible things before breakfast?

If so, then Web Watch has a challenge for you. Two, actually.

All you have to do is complete THE IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ and THE IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ, PART 2.

In each of these challenging games, you will be faced with riddles, trivia, wordplay, graphic funnies, and other “think outside of the box” questions. Be wary – things are not always as they appear. You may have to click something other than the presented answers, or possibly type something on the keyboard when you least expect it.

Having some knowledge of basic jokes any 5-year-old would know will be helpful as well.

Good luck!

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Think you have an awesome name for your band? So does everyone else

web gangsta — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 00:00:35 +0000

We’ve all played that game: somebody says something that sounds a bit off while you’re all out drinking at the bar (something along the lines of “Hey, what those bar hotties reject Ian’s pickup line”) , and someone else in the room chimes in with “hey, that would make a great band name!” (in this case, “Bar Hottie Rejects”).

If Web Watch had a nickel for every awesome band name that we’ve come up with while in a drunken stupor – well, we’d be in a drunken stupor a lot more often (but drinking more expensive stuff).

The Wall Street Journal recently wrote a piece that analyzed a band name database, and came away with the determination that ALL THE GOOD BAND NAMES ARE ALREADY TAKEN.

The most popular band name in their research? “Bliss”, with 18 different bands laying claim to the name. Other most popular band names include “Mirage”, “One”, “Gemini”, “Legacy”, “Paradox”, and “Rain”.

So all this means is that if you have a band that’s looking to get started down that long road to fame, you have to be more diligent with your research, trademark filings, MySpace/Facebook/Twitter accounts, and more.

Sometimes, all it takes is sending a text message to your grandmother for band name inspiration. That’s how LMFAO GOT THE NAME OF THEIR ACT. They wanted to call themselves “Sexe” (pronounced “sex-say”), and when they texted their grandmother their idea, she responded “LMFAO“. Redfoo and Sky Blu knew a good idea when they saw it, and they decided to run with LMFAO instead.

Grandma likes to party, it seems. Good for her.

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Meet Trent. To some, Trent is a savior. (You might not want to shake his hand, though)

web gangsta — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 00:00:55 +0000

TRENT C. ARSENAULT IS A PROFESSIONAL SPERM DONOR.

Although, perhaps “professional” is not the correct word to use, as Trent gives his sperm away for free to any interested party.

He claims at least 10 successful pregnancies, and suggests that those interested in his services use the “local pickup” option, although FedEx is available if necessary.

Trent’s website contains what claims to be his complete medical history (including the typical chicken pox at 5-years-old), and ready-for-notarizing documents that describe exactly what is or isn’t expected out of all parties involved.

What isn’t clear is exactly why Trent has decided to make himself available for free, but there do seem to be any number of people willing to take Trent up on his offer.

If contacting Trent for his services sounds like something that you might be interested in, Web Watch would like to point out that you may want to BE WARY OF SPERM DONORS THAT YOU MEET ONLINE.

Some donors will insist only on providing via “natural method only”.
Some donors have a small catch – potential recipients must fly to their countries (at their own expense) for a face-to-face meeting
Many countries are no longer paying for donations, causing the potential donor pool to dry up – no pun intended. For example, as Canada doesn’t pay for donations anymore, about 80% of the sperm donated to Canadian women comes from the United States. Finally, an industry where the US is on the positive side of the trade deficit.

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Justin Bieber wants you to check out his bowl cut!

web gangsta — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 00:00:55 +0000

Web Watch knows that our Web Watch readers have tons of embarrassing photos of themselves from when they were younger and lacked any sort of fashion sense or humility.

Didn’t everyone have that plaid pants/white belt combo? Yeah, thought so… we think it was required dress code for the under-8 set.

But think about your parents, trying to save a buck or two by doing basic haircuts at home instead of taking the kids to Supercuts or Great Clips or the local mall salon that charges you $20 just to ask the receptionist a question.

And that’s where the classic bowl cut haircut comes in. And where there are bad haircuts, there have to be photos. And when there are photos, there’s a photoblog waiting to jump into the action.

So take the time to upload your most embarrassingly bad hair cut photo to CHECK OUT MY BOWL CUT, and join the ranks of Justin Bieber and other folks that are having really bad hair days

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Video Fun: The Luckiest People Alive

web gangsta — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 00:00:08 +0000

Feeling lucky? These people are….

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The Five Saltiest Restaurant Meals You Can Order

web gangsta — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 00:00:41 +0000

Web Watch knows that too much salt can be bad for you.

Which really stinks, because salt makes things taste good. Which just makes Web Watch want to know why things that taste that good are always bad for you.

But since Web Watch cares about our readers, we thought we’d help you out with your hypertension and tell you what the FIVE SALTIEST RESTAURANT MEALS are, just in case you wanted to cut back a little and lower your overall sodium intake.

Denny’s Meat Lover’s Scramble (3180 mg sodium, 1130 calories)
Chili’s Boneless Buffalo Chicken Salad (4,380 mg sodium, 1,070 calories)
Blimpie Turkey and Bacon 12″ Super Stacked (5,244 mg sodium, 1,165 calories)
On the Border Firecracker Stuffed Jalapenos with Chile con Queso (6,540 mg sodium, 1,950 calories)
P.F. Chang’s Double Pan-Fried Noodles with Pork (7,900 mg sodium, 452 calories)

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Drink this – it’s the Ultimate Hangover Cure of the Future

web gangsta — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 00:00:34 +0000

Hangovers.

We’ve all suffered through ‘em, whether it be at a Waffle House at 8am after a killer night on the town, or hanging out at the Magic Kingdom after doing DRINKS AROUND THE WORLD at Epcot at Walt Disney World three times too many in one day.

We’ve tried all the cures, but nobody really has attacked the real problem: that maybe it’s the alcohol that’s causing the hangover issue.

Leave it to scientists to figure out how to make HANGOVER-FREE ALCOHOL.

Apparently, hangovers are not caused by the alcohol itself, but by the process your body goes through to get the alcohol out of your system. It ends up that your body needs oxygen, water, and carbon dioxide to do its work (probably why you feel so dehydrated the next day).

So it’s simple – drink enough water and get enough oxygen, and you should be fine, right? And since Web Watch readers already know to drink one full glass of water for every alcoholic beverage you have (yeah, right), we know that the water part has already been taken care of.

Which leaves trying to get more oxygen into your system. The scientists had the same thought you just did – what if the alcohol itself contained the oxygen?

Brilliant!

After feeding their test subjects their newly-oxygenated beverages, scientists found out that the extra oxygen appeared to reduce blood alcohol levels faster than regular alcoholic beverages did.

Of course, more tests need to be done to prove what all this means to the average drunkard looking to get sober faster and with less pain, but Web Watch is sure that there will be plenty of willing volunteers hoping to be picked to be a test subject on the next go-around.

Oxygen-enriched alcohol may not solve all hangovers, but if they can make the next morning even slightly more bearable, then it’s a step in the right direction.

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10 Fast Fart Facts (now say that 10 times fast)

web gangsta — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 00:00:18 +0000

Let’s face it, Web Watch fans: farts are fun.

You know it, they know it. Sure, they may stink up a little at times, but they make the person doing the farting feel good, and those around them usually laugh a little bit. All in all, farts are not just good for you, but good for the people who hear it.

Certainly brings up the question that if farts bring so much joy to people’s lives, why people aren’t farting in public more often.

Perhaps some of these selected FUN AND FANTASTIC FART FACTS can help shed some light on the subject:

The average person farts 14 times per day
The average person emits half a liter of fart gas per day
Farts are flammable
Farts travel at 7 MPH
Farts cannot suffocate you (in other words, “dutch ovens” cannot kill you)
Beans are a magical fruit, along with garlic, beer, and milk
Farts caused by swallowed air will not stink
Dead people can fart
Termites, camels, and zebras are the three most prolific farters
Hydrogen sulfide cause farts to stink

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Can YOU name the top 50 global brands?

web gangsta — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 00:00:19 +0000

It’s hard to differentiate your brand in a small market.

Imagine how difficult it can be to establish your brand in today’s world-wide environment.

Now imagine how more complicated that has become with the Internet diluting everybody’s attention span to that of a walnut. Now you have an idea of how hard it can be to get a new brand noticed in the competitive world-wide field.

Especially when other companies have had decades-upon-decade head start on you.

Here is a list of the TOP 50 BEST GLOBAL PUBLICALLY-TRADED BRANDS FOR 2009, as ranked by their overall brand value in the marketplace.

The first ten are fairly easy to pinpoint by anybody who’s been paying attention to anything around them:

Coca-Cola
IBM
Microsoft
General Electric
Nokia
McDonald’s
Google
Toyota
Intel
DisneyAnd the rest are a bit more interesting where they fell:
Hewlett-Packard
Mercedes-Benz
Gillette
Cisco
BMW
Louis Vuitton
Marlboro
Honda
Samsung
Apple
H&M
American Express
Pepsi
Oracle
Nescafe
Nike
SAP
Ikea
Sony
Budweiser
UPS
HSBC
Canon
Kellogg’s
Dell
Citibank
JP Morgan
Goldman Sachs
Nintendo
Reuters
Gucci
Philips
Amazon
L’oreal
Accenture
eBay
Siemens
Heinz
Ford
Zara

More interesting than how many of these global brands could you name – how many of these brands do you touch or interact with on a daily basis as part of your everyday life?

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Watch this video: Jedward’s UNDER PRESSURE / ICE ICE BABY

web gangsta — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 00:00:29 +0000

Apparently, Web Watch has been living under a rock since last November when teen sensation JEDWARD hit the scene in Britain’s THE X FACTOR program.

Sure, they may have lost the competition, but that hasn’t stopped JEDWARD (aka eighteen-year-old identical twins John Paul Henry Daniel Richard Grimes and Edward Peter Anthony Kevin Patrick Grimes) from moving forward and releasing their popular version of UNDER PRESSURE (ICE ICE BABY) as their first official release.

The best part? Getting Vanilla Ice to sing on the single. Maybe they’ll learn something about music sampling and the trouble that including unlicensed clips can bring by including him.

Watch the video below:

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Oscar Watch 2010: the nominated animated short LOGORAMA is AWESOME

web gangsta — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 00:00:19 +0000

Have you heard about the Oscar-nominated animated short LOGORAMA? It’s about 15-minutes long, and takes place in a world where everything – and we do mean EVERYTHING – is a logo.

The police, for example, are Bibendum (you may know Bibendum as “The Michelin Tire Guy”).

The zoo contains the Democratic Party elephant and Izod alligator logos.

Generic passers-by are the AOL guy and the BIC pen people. If you know of a company that has a vehicle as their logo, you can be sure that it will be seen driving around this Logo city.

The plot is your basic cop-versus-bad guy story, with NSFW language that seems to have been pulled from a Tarintino movie. But the creativity that went into creating a world made entirely of corporate logos is astounding.

Web Watch picked Logorama to win this category in our annual Oscars movie pool, without having even seen the film. Now that we have watched it, we’re not changing our selection at all.

Enjoy!

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The New Fashion Trend: Bedazzling Your Hoo-Ha (aka “Vajazzle” and “Vagacial”)

web gangsta — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 00:00:57 +0000

Web Watch thinks that some things are perfectly fine the way they are, but apparently some women think that some body parts are always in need of a little, well, something “extra”.

And we’re not talking about a simple bikini wax or the more complicated and deadly Brazilian wax (yes, a Brazilian wax can kill you, remember?).

If you’re one of those women who think that their special place needs a little special something, then Web Watch would like to point you in the proper direction to get that taken care of.

First, let us introduce you to THE ART OF VAJAZZLING (eg VAJAZZLING: from the root word “vajazzle”, meaning “to bedazzle your vag”. As used in a sentence -- “I can’t believe you got vajazzled!”)

It’s hard to explain in words exactly what vajazzling is all about when there are Youtube videos available that can do it visually much better. Let’s take a look at what BRYCE GRUBER did when she got her parts all fancied up:

If you’re in the market to get tiny crystals stuck down your pants in the name of beauty, you can have it done in New York City for about $110.

WHAT DO OTHERS SAY ABOUT VAJAZZLING? Here are some of the comments:

Of course, if you decide to get vajazzled, you will have to do it after you get your deadly Brazilian wax.

But in the days after your wax has been done, you might want to freshen that area up just a little bit before those fancy crystals get glued to your pelvis. You don’t want that $110 to go to waste, do you?

That’s where the VAGACIAL comes in.

Yes, it’s like a facial, but as you can tell by the name -- it’s not done on your face. The vagacial involves four steps:

First the skin is cleansed with a body wash and witch hazel
Then it’s covered with a papaya exfoliating gel… leaving that area smelling papaya-fresh, we’re sure
Ingrown hairs are removed, then a beauty mask is applied.
Finally, some lightening cream. Because the right color down there matters.

And men, if you feel left out of all this waxing and cosmetic talk, spas offer BOYZILIAN WAXES just for you, too. Oy.

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Top 15 Houseplants Every Household Should Have. (It’s SCIENCE!)

web gangsta — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 00:00:53 +0000

If you don’t have a lot of houseplants around your home, you should.

We already know that plants are good for the environment, smell nice, and look pretty while sitting on the plant rack in the corner of your kitchen.

But now scientists have determined – scientifically, of course – which are the absolute BEST HOUSEPLANTS TO HAVE IN YOUR HOME.

Why? Because plants will help clean the air in your house more efficiently and naturally than anything else you can find. The folks at NASA even determined that you should have one plant for every 100 square feet of living space in your house.

So what are some of the 15 plants that you should run out to the store to buy right now?

Areca Palm Tree or the Lady Palm – these two plants were determined to be the absolute best at purifying the air around, according to NASA.
Bamboo Palm
Boston Fern - have a lot of formaldehyde at your home? One of these babies will suck tons of formaldehyde up with no problem, along with mercury, arsenic, and other heavy metals.
Rubber Plant
Dracaena
English Ivy
Date Palm Tree
Ficus Alii
Peace Lily
Aloe Vera

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Today’s Fun Fact: Smoking Leads to Saggy Boobs (and 14 other tidbits)

web gangsta — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:00:36 +0000

If you are a woman and you smoke, Web Watch would like to inform you that you are doing your body more harm than good.

A study in 2007 determined that there were THREE CONTRIBUTING FACTORS TO SAGGING BREASTS, and not one of those factors involved breastfeeding. The study determined that the three factors were:

The woman’s age
Whether she smoked or not
The number of children that she had

Apparently, smoking breaks down the elastin in the skin. And elastin, as we all know, is what shapes and supports the breast.

Here are some of the other 14 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT BREASTS:

Breast milk contains more vitamin E than cow’s milk
Women are allowed to be legally topless in public in Texas, Ohio, Hawaii, New York, and Maine.
20,967 women removed their breast implants in 2008
The most popular cosmetic procedure in 2008 was a breast enlargement, with 307,230 of them. Nose jobs and lipo were 2nd and 3rd on the list

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Update to our Discovery Channel “Boom de ya da” Post

web gangsta — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 00:00:23 +0000

Earlier this month, Web Watch posted about parodies of the Discovery Channel’s BOOM DE YA DA commercial.

How could we not include THIS TRIBUTE TO WEB COMIC xkcd featuring online favs like Cory Doctorow and Wil Wheaton, which was based on THIS xkcd cartoon, based on the Discovery Channel commercial (shown below). Whew!

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Flash Fun: an Alice in Wonderland-based audio/mouse-control game

web gangsta — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 00:00:44 +0000

By now, Web Watch is sure that you’ve seen the trailers for Johnny Depp and Tim Burton’s new Disney film ALICE IN WONDERLAND.

The fact that a film is pending to be released hasn’t stopped game developers from not releasing games that are based on Lewis Carroll’s classic.

Take RECORD TRIPPING, for example – aside from being based on the familar tale of Alice chasing the White Rabbit around Wonderland and encountering the Mad Hatter and other interesting characters, it’s the game mechanics that really set RECORD TRIPPING apart from other online games.

Using your mouse’s scroll wheel and left-button, you manipulate the displayed environment in the same manner as a club DJ would scratch a record or slow down music at a party. Each game level is presented as the next chapter in the book, and consists of manipulating the audio to affect the action on the screen.

In one example, you’re required to open a safe by spinning the combination lock. As you scroll your mouse wheel in one direction to spin the safe’s lock, the audio reverses itself. Scrolling the other way has you fast-forwarding through the audio. Eventually, either you will complete the task at hand, or time will run out for that level.

All in all, it’s a unique way to play a casual online game, and one that looks and sounds phenomenal as well.

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FOOD ALERT! Girl Scout cookie Thin Mints are still smaller, so try this recipe

web gangsta — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 00:00:33 +0000

It really shouldn’t bother Web Watch as much as it does.

After all, eating too many cookies of any type isn’t good for you. Heck, even Cookie Monster says that “Cookies are a Sometimes Food”

But as the Chicago Sun-Times and others pointed out last year, Girl Scout cookies were getting a bit smaller, perhaps due to the recession. There’s even a FACEBOOK page devoted to fans who want to get their 8 cookies back in the box.

But now an entire whole year has passed since, and Web Watch dutifully went to the local grocery store to buy our annual allottment of Thin Mints, Tagalongs, and Samoas from the Girl Scouts (and their parents) trying to sell off their excess inventory*.

And Web Watch can confirm that this year’s Thin Mints Economic Indicator shows that the economy is still in the gutter as the 2010 box looks to be the same as the 2009 box. That is, in 2010 we’re still looking at a smaller box and fewer cookies.

First, let’s take a look at the physical box sizes compare a 2010 Thin Mint cookie box to a 2008 Thin Mint cookie box that Web Watch just happened to have in our freezer. (That’s right, Web Watch has a Thin Mint cookie stash for such emergencies. Frozen, they last for years and still taste great.)

Note the size difference in the two boxes. The 2008 box is a full 1/2″ bigger. Aside from this, the 2008 box held 10oz of Thin Mint goodness, while this year’s box only contains 9oz of cookies. At least the smaller box is indicative that it contains fewer cookies inside.

But that’s not all. Let’s take a look a the nutritional difference between the 2008 Thin Mints and 2010 box. Luckily, the “official” serving size of 4 cookies has not changed.

And since we already know that the smaller, 9oz box contains fewer cookies, here we can see that we have lost 2 full servings of cookies (from “about 9 servings” per 2008 box to “about 7 servings” in 2010). Again, Web Watch will reiterate that both of these figures are wrong – “about one box” is a single serving, even with the smaller box size.

The real shocker is that the nutritional numbers between the 2008 and 2010 cookies have completely changed. Not only has the calorie count per serving increased – from 150 calories per 4-cookie serving in 2008 to 160 calories per 4-cookie serving in 2010, but there’s a slightly higher saturated fat (4.5g to 5g), slightly higher total fat (7g to 8g), more sodium (115mg to 120mg), and more total carbs (20g to 22g). Even the total protein number has gotten worse, going from 2g in 2008 to 1g in 2010.

Reading the ingredient list, nothing seems to have changed from one year to another, but the formulation must have been adjusted in some manner. Has the taste changed? It’s hard to tell — Web Watch needs to put this box away in the freezer for safe keeping until sometime next year. Gotta rotate the stock, you know.

So now that you know that 2010 doesn’t bring back the giant head-sized box of Thin Mints that you used to know and love, there’s always the option of trying to make a batch of Thin Mints on your own so you can have as many as you want without worrying about the box size. And having made this recipe in the past, Web Watch can wholeheartedly recommend this TOP SECRET recipe for THIN MINTS by Todd Wilbur.

*Web Watch strongly encourages buying Girl Scout cookies this way if you don’t have friends with Girl Scout connections. If the troop has to order just one box of cookies to fulfill an order, they have to buy the entire case and try to sell the rest to others. Sometimes the orders they receive work out to a perfect case, sometimes they don’t. All we know is that the parents who schlep the cookies out to the grocery store each weekend until they’re gone seem happier selling these cookies than when they are forcing co-workers to sign-up for cookies at the office.

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Can you name all of Heinz’ 57 Varieties?

web gangsta — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 00:00:25 +0000

You’ve seen Heinz’ giant pickle logo, proudly talking about Heinz’ 57 varieties.

You’ve even had Heinz 57 sauce on your Cheeseburger in Paradise, along with some lettuce and tomato and french-fried potato.

But can you name the other 56 Heinz varieties?

Yes, it’s a trick question.

According to THE STRAIGHT DOPE, at one point there were not just 57 varieties, but over 1,300! Henry J. Heinz just thought that “57 Varieites” was an interesting marketing slogan.

But there must be some truth to the matter, as at one point HEINZ PUBLISHED AN ADVERTISEMENT SPECIFICALLY LISTING THEIR 57 VARIETIES.

Because Web Watch like to help, here are just ten of the listed 57 varieties you may have missed out on:

Heinz Oven-baked Beans with Pork and Tomato Sauce
Heinz Oven-baked Beans without Tomato Sauce, with Pork – Boston Style
Heinz Oven-baked Beans in Tomato Sauce without Meat – Vegetarian
Heinz Chow Chow Pickle
Heinz India Relish
Heinz Evaporated Horse Radish
Heinz Pepper Pot Soup
Heinz Gherkins – Sweet or Sour
Heinz Fig Pudding
Heinz Salad Cream

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Having trouble making a toast or speaking in public? Try one of these 10 tips

web gangsta — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 00:00:12 +0000

Are you one of those people who have trouble making a toast or otherwise speaking in public? For some folks, singing in the shower is easy, but singing in front of an audience is scary. Speaking into a microphone instead of singing can be equally nerve-wracking for people who are uncomfortable being the center of attention.

But whether it be a wedding or other celebrations, or merely standing in front of a room of your peers and making a business presentation, PUBLIC SPEAKING IS EASY IF YOU FOLLOW THESE “TOASTMASTERS” TEN STEPS:

Know your material. You know how easy it is to talk about yourself? That’s because you’re the one who knows most about you.
Practice. Practice. Practice!
Know the audience. Have you ever been to a party where you didn’t know anyone? Remember how hard it was to start some of those initial conversations, and wouldn’t it have been easier if you were there with a wingman to introduce you to a few people? Speaking in public is the same way — it’s always easier to speak to people you already know… and who know you.
Know the room. Familiarize yourself with your surroundings. Be comfortable with where you are.
Relax.
Visualize. Whether it be yourself giving the speech, or the warm reception you’ll receive when you finish — a positive image in your mind reinforces the job you’re doing
Realize that people want you to succeed. The audience is there on purpose, to see you.
Don’t apologize. If something went wrong or feels off, chance are that you’re the only one who noticed it. Don’t worry about mistakes or point them out.
Concentrate on the message. The world does not revolve around reading the text off the Powerpoint slide – the audience can do that for themselves. Focus on the message that you’re trying to convey from the presentation and the points that you want the audience to take away. What’s the purpose behind the slides?
Gain experience. The more you do it, the better you’ll be. If at first you don’t succeed, try again.

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11 More Surprising Sex Statistics

web gangsta — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 00:00:38 +0000

A few months ago, WEB WATCH brought faithful Web Watch readers a list of 10 SURPRISING SEX STATISTICS.

Thanks to the editors at WOMAN’S DAY magazine, Web Watch is pleased to bring you the following list of 11 SURPRISING SEX STATISTICS that you knew you’ve been wondering about.

The percentage of women who say that they have sex simply to get their boyfriend or husband to help around the house: 84%
30 minutes of sex burns 200 calories, on average. Foreplay, sadly, does not count towards this total.
20% of Americans have had sex with a co-worker. Think about this — if you work in a 5-person office, that means two of you have slept together.
One in four Americans have an incurable STD. Remember that 5-person office you’re working in? See those other four people across the room from you? Guess what one of them has?
12% of married people sleep alone, whether it be in separate rooms or separate beds.
The average couple spends 20 minutes on foreplay.
The average person has sex 103 times per year, or about once every 3.5 days.
48% of women surveyed have faked an orgasm at least once
48% of Americans report that they are satisfied with their sex life. The report was not clear if this 48% and the 48% who faked orgasms were the same group.

Be sure to check the link for the other 2 surprising sex statistics that we left out. Web Watch knows you want to see what we left out…

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How to Use a Kitchen Knife (and keep your fingers)

web gangsta — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 00:00:15 +0000

If there’s one thing that Web Watch has learned from watching hours of Food Network programming, it’s that there are many different ways to maim yourself with a kitchen knife as there are foods that need to be sliced and diced.

Tom Mylan, owner of THE MEAT HOOK in Brooklyn, New York, knows a thing or two about proper knife usage since he uses them every day as part of his job.

Here are some of Tom’s TIPS FOR HOW TO USE A KNIFE IN THE KITCHEN:

Wooden handles are better than plastic handles if you’re working with a lot of slippery foods. Wood allows you to continue to hold your grip, while plastic handles can slip out of your hands
Keep your knife sharp, whether this means learning to use a steel or taking your knives to a professional sharpener.
Hold the knife firmly at all times. This will help you keep track of where the blade is.
Never cut towards yourself
Keep your workplace, cutting area, and the knife clean. Cleanliness helps avoid stupid mistakes due to having things in the way or on the knife blade or handle that could lead to injury.
Never leave a knife just lying around. Always put them away in a safe place when they’re not in active use.
If you do cut yourself, there’s no need to rush for the first-aid kit. Just wash the cut out, wrap it with clean paper towels and kitchen plastic wrap, and wrap it as tight as necessary. This will buy you time until you can adequately deal with the cut with proper medical care.

One commenter had this to add to Tom’s list: “Never try to catch a falling knife.”

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What is the key of YOUR favorite songs?

web gangsta — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 00:00:49 +0000

Remember back when Web Watch told you about how THERE SHE GOES by SIXPENCE NONE THE RICHER was called THE MOST PERFECT SONG EVER RECORDED? It was called that, in part due to its ideal song length, and for other reasons as well.

While it may not be a way to tell if what you’re listening to is THE perfect song or not, if you’re a LAST.FM user than we can at least identify if the key of your favorite songs all fall into the same ballpark or not.

In other words, do you favor listening to songs that are in the same key or not?

There’s no need to sign into your Last.FM account (and Web Watch wouldn’t encourage handing out your passwords to any of these types of services anyway) — all you have to do is click over to HacKEY and type in your Last.FM username. Since all Last.FM playlists are public, HacKEY can then scan the top 50 listened-to songs in your playlist and pull additional metadata from the Last.FM database about each song. In this case, the song keys.

Web Watch ran HacKEY on our own Last.FM playlist, and here are the results:

25% of all our favorite songs were in F major
15% were C major
10% of our songs were either B-flat major, G Major, or E minor
Rounding out at 5% were B-flat minor, G-flat minor, A major, and E major.
The remainders were lumped together as “others”

Web Watch had thought that we preferred minor keyed songs, but with our Last.FM playlist showing us preferring majors over minors with a 75% vs 25% margin, we may need to rethink our music tastes.

As for what key THERE SHE GOES is written in? Sounds like B-flat to us.

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Congratulations, Fresno! You’re America’s Drunkest City!

web gangsta — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 00:00:52 +0000

It wasn’t officially a competition, but we do have a winner (according to the fine folks at MEN’S HEALTH magazine).

By an overwhelming margin, FRESNO, CALIFORNIA HAS BEEN NAMED AMERICA’S DRUNKEST CITY out of 100 entries! Time to celebrate!

Web Watch is sure that you’re asking how Fresno earned this vaulted honor. It was quite easy, actually.

Men’s Health took into account the following pieces of information:

Death rate from alcoholic liver disease
Deaths due to DUI
The number of DUI arrests
The number of admitted binge drinkers in the past month
The severity — or lack thereof — of DUI penalties

Cities were rated on a scale with 1 being the worst in the selected category. The lower your overall score ended up, the higher your city ranked on the “drunkest city” list. Let’s take a look, shall we?

We already know that Fresno, California is America’s Drunkest City — but who were the 99 runners-up?

Fresno, California
Reno, Nevada
Billings, Montana
Riverside, California
Austin, Texas
St. Louis, Missouri
San Antonio, Texas
Lubbock, Texas
Tucson, Arizona
Bakersfield, California
Las Vegas, Nevada
Modesto, California
Columbia, South Carolina
Nashville, Tennessee
Madison, Wisconsin
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Denver, Colorado
Phoenix, Arizona
Cheyenne, Wyoming
Sacramento, California
New Orleans, Louisiana
Toledo, Ohio
Aurora, Colorado
El Paso, Texas
Corpus Christi, Texas
Fargo, North Dakota
San Diego, California
Lexington, Kentucky
Tampa, Florida
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Jacksonville, Florida
Detroit, Michigan
Boise City, Idaho
Kansas City, Missouri
Washington DC
Montgomery, Alabama
Omaha, Nebraska
Portland, Oregon
Anchorage, Alaska
Birmingham, Alabama
Greensboro, North Carolina
Wichita, Kansas
St. Petersburg, Florida
Burlington, Vermont
Houston, Texas
Los Angeles, California
Charleston, West Virginia
Orlando, Florida
Spokane, Washington
Lincoln, Nebraska
Arlington, Texas
Des Moines, Iowa
Fort Worth, Texas
Providence, Rhode Island
Anaheim, California
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Baltimore, Maryland
Indianapolis, Indiana
Louisville, Kentucky
Raleigh, North Carolina
Seattle, Washington
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Buffalo, New York
Wilmington, Delaware
Hartford, Connecticut
Sioux Falls, South Dakota
Virginia Beach, Virginia
Memphis, Tennessee
Cincinatti, Ohio
Cleveland, Ohio
Charlotte, North Carolina
Oakland, California
Little Rock, Arkansas
Dallas, Texas
Richmond, Virginia
San Jose, California
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Jackson, Mississippi
Jersey City, New Jersey
Columbus, Ohio
Atlanta, Georgia
Chicago, Illinios
San Francisco, California
St. Paul, Minnesota
Honolulu, Hawaii
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Portland, Maine
Manchester, New Hampshire
Fort Wayne, Indiana
New York, New York
Durham, North Carolina
Newark, New Jersey
Miami, Florida
Salt Lake City, Utah
Rochester, New York
Yonkers, New York
Boston, Massachusetts

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Introducing “My New Pink Button” (sometimes the jokes write themselves)

web gangsta — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 00:00:21 +0000

Web Watch will refrain from making any commentary about MY NEW PINK BUTTON, a new makeup product proclaiming to add a youthful pinkness to a woman’s Lady Parts.

No – unlike Natalie Bui at the University of Colorado, Web Watch will not say that we are “repulsed” or state that it’s sad that “women have become so self-conscious of their bodies that they feel that even their most intimate parts must be altered and “beautified.”

We will not call My New Pink Button “yet another extreme product to alter women’s bodies to appear more like the porn star ideal“, as Little Miss Brightside has done.

Nor will we call My New Pink Button as the “worst Valentine’s Day Gift, ever“.

No, Web Watch will not do this.

What Web Watch can do is offer the following information, taken straight from the My New Pink Button website, allowing faithful Web Watch readers to form their own opinion on the product.

After all, My New Pink Button wouldn’t exist if there wasn’t some demand for it, right?

My New Pink Button is a temporary dye to restore the youthful pink color back to your labia. There is no other product like it. This patent pending formula was designed by a female certified Paramedical Esthetician after she discovered her own genital color loss. While looking online for a solution she discovered thousands of other women asking the same questions regarding their color loss. After countless searches revealing no solution available and a discussion with her own gynecologist she decided to create her own. Now there is a solution!
Bettie: Think of that favorite lipstick you wear for those dressy black tie affairs and think “Bettie”. This shade blends with a woman’s own skin tones to bring out that “sexy hot pink, I am fired up, look”. Go dancing this weekend and remember to bring “Bettie” along!
Marilyn is the lightest of our colors. Good for beginners who want to make a slight change fresh color change in their appearance or those who are very fair skinned. For a more dramatic result check out our other colors.
Ginger will combine with darker skin tones to bring forth a real rosy tone. Use this one and be “Ginger-licious!”
Audrey: For the woman that loves to be daring, we bring you “Audrey”! This is the deepest, darkest color that we offer to give you a bold burgundy pink color. Perfect for everyone, and your own base color will determine the depth of this shade. Tonight its Show time!!
Our Products are Never Tested on Animals, but it will bring out the Animal in You!

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“12 Signs That He’s Falling in Love With You” are really “12 Signs You’re On a First Date”

web gangsta — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 00:00:02 +0000

For some single women, the biggest question that they can ask as they’re at that short-term/long-term relationship cusp is HOW CAN WE TELL IF HE’S FALLING IN LOVE WITH ME?

Web Watch will ignore the obvious “when he says I Love You first”, because we all know that never happens.

So here are some of the 12 signs that ALL WOMEN’S TALK have come up with:

He loves spending time with you
He smiles at you
He can talk with you for a long time
He gets you gifts
He offers to take you out to dinner and a movie
He passionately makes love to you

Seriously? Those are some of the 12 items on the list?

That makes it sound like “trying to get some” or “your basic first date” is the same as “falling in love”.

How about something more meaningful, like “he willingly gives up his weekends to play canasta with your parents”? That’s a sign of true love, there.

Any other suggestions, post ‘em below!

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Web Watch by Web Gangsta

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