http://www.thesuperficial.com Celebrity Photos and Gossip Thu, 24 May 2012 23:04:03 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-thursday-5-24-12-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-thursday-5-24-12-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 19:45:34 +0000 Photo Boy http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1628081

Why hello, boo- AHHH! Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed which draws pretty heavily on one particular event at Cannes, mostly because lots of breasts were present, but more importantly because Fawaz Gruosi has upped his game considerably since his last purchase date. We’ve also got a few shots from the Men In Black Read More ...]]> 452 http://www.thesuperficial.com/britney-spears-x-factor-rider-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/britney-spears-x-factor-rider-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 18:37:58 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1627801

Despite being a ward of the state, Britney Spears is getting $15 million to judge X-Factor but that don’t mean a girl can’t ask for some chicken and potato salad delivered to her dressing room in the mornin’. So here’s her official X-Factor rider which surprisingly includes diet soda, so just assume her dad added Read More ...]]> 54 http://www.thesuperficial.com/nicole-kidman-zac-efron-golden-shower-the-paperboy-cannes-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/nicole-kidman-zac-efron-golden-shower-the-paperboy-cannes-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 17:29:51 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1627662

Incontinence got you down? When I found out Zac Efron and Nicole Kidman were starring in a movie called The Paperboy, I honestly just assumed it was an adaptation of the classic arcade game because Hollywood is straight the fuck out of ideas. Turns out it’s actually some sort of murder-mystery dealie set in the Read More ...]]> 20 http://www.thesuperficial.com/john-travolta-gay-cross-dresser-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/john-travolta-gay-cross-dresser-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 16:14:15 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1627172

Besides these. Before I get started, there’s a rumor floating around that John Travolta either attempted to, or is currently attempting to, leave the Church of Scientology hence the recent onslaught of tabloid stories rife with anus puckering and surprise BJs. And that rumor seems more and more likely considering The National Enquirer is suddenly Read More ...]]> 46 http://www.thesuperficial.com/kelly-clarkson-lost-weight-for-her-boyfriend-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/kelly-clarkson-lost-weight-for-her-boyfriend-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 15:21:45 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1626802

When Kelly Clarkson was born, she must’ve really pissed off God considering he felt the need to curse her with the worst body type imaginable: Chunky with no boobs. However, despite claims about loving her “real body,” Kelly’s been looking noticeably slimmer lately which you’d just assume was done out of concern for her health Read More ...]]> 26 http://www.thesuperficial.com/bill-clinton-porn-stars-brooklyn-lee-tasha-reign-gwyneth-paltrow-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/bill-clinton-porn-stars-brooklyn-lee-tasha-reign-gwyneth-paltrow-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 14:02:38 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1626251

Bill Clinton and Prince Albert of Monaco hosted a star-studded charity gala last night featuring such celebrities as Joshua Jackson, Diane Kruger, will.i.am and, most hilariously, Gwyneth Paltrow who got to experience the joy of thinking she’s an important dignitary only to find out Slick Willie also stocked the place full of porn stars like Read More ...]]> 63 http://www.thesuperficial.com/audrina-patridge-bikini-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/audrina-patridge-bikini-05-2012#comments Thu, 24 May 2012 13:12:45 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1625912

- It’s Redhead Thursday. - Jennifer Lopez got Casper Smart his own TV show. No, really. - Sharon Stone apparently hates Filipinos now. - Anyone else completely forget that Jesse James‘ ex was the Blink 182 girl? Also, if you’re thinking about going into porn, don’t click this link, you stay Read More ...]]> 19 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-wednesday-5-23-12-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-wednesday-5-23-12-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 21:00:29 +0000 Photo Boy http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1624701

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed that unapologetically begins and ends with Kelly Brook, because I understand how to keep a job that lets me work in my jam-jams. We’ve also got Jennifer Love Hewitt whose flight obviously arrived just after Cinnabon closed, but Zac Efron‘s got there just in time for him to Read More ...]]> 439 http://www.thesuperficial.com/michelle-rodriguez-bikini-cannes-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/michelle-rodriguez-bikini-cannes-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 19:40:45 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1624791

Here’s Michelle Rodriguez at Eden Roc where she stays every year for Cannes because she’s a bisexual spider-monkey who constantly dives off shit. Also, they let her jump on top of cars as they pull up so people can feed her grapes through a cracked window. “Ha, look, honey, she’s grabbing your tit. We loved Read More ...]]> 49 http://www.thesuperficial.com/diddy-cannes-party-yacht-shoes-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/diddy-cannes-party-yacht-shoes-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 18:50:21 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1624592

You and I live boring, conventional lives where getting invited over to someone’s house and being asked to remove our shoes is generally accepted because we all know shampooing carpets takes fucking forever. Also, shoes are violent oppressors whose shackles I’ve long since escaped, you toesy-restricting bastards. Anyway, when someone like Diddy throws a lavish Read More ...]]> 138 http://www.thesuperficial.com/tara-reid-is-all-the-rage-in-europe-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/tara-reid-is-all-the-rage-in-europe-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 17:55:11 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1624181

Earlier this morning, I linked to an article on Lainey Gossip that identified Tara Reid‘s date to a Cannes yacht party as diamond mogul Fawaz Gruosi, so here are a bunch more pics of Tara at Cannes because apparently filthy rich Europeans can’t get enough of her. They’re so forward thinking. “I do say, Reginald, Read More ...]]> 45 http://www.thesuperficial.com/courtney-stodden-is-very-subtle-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/courtney-stodden-is-very-subtle-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 17:19:17 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1623472

In case you thought Courtney Stodden only wears lingerie to bake with her mom, here she is not so much washing a Mercedes as her heaving, child-bride implants except I don’t even know why I just said child-bride because, let’s be realistic, they’re not even pretending she’s 17 anymore. At this rate, the next themed Read More ...]]> 91 http://www.thesuperficial.com/of-course-john-mayer-uses-fifty-shades-of-grey-to-pick-up-chicks-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/of-course-john-mayer-uses-fifty-shades-of-grey-to-pick-up-chicks-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 16:01:31 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1622881

John Mayer has a new album to promote, so it’s time to make with what he thinks are hilarious slice-of-life stories about how much pussy he gets because he’s so super-rich it doesn’t even matter that he walks around pretending to be Johnny Depp. Or homeless. I don’t even know how you tell the difference. Read More ...]]> 14 http://www.thesuperficial.com/snooki-boy-names-pregnant-jersey-shore-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/snooki-boy-names-pregnant-jersey-shore-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 14:39:20 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1622661

Because soon people will realize they’ve been hypnotized into staring at the warthog from The Lion King get the clap and stop watching, Snooki is selling every last detail of her pregnancy to anyone with a checkbook and/or pack of Slim Jims. So here she is exclusively revealing to In Touch that she’s having a Read More ...]]> 42 http://www.thesuperficial.com/tracy-morgan-khloe-kardashian-father-obama-gangbanger-conan-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/tracy-morgan-khloe-kardashian-father-obama-gangbanger-conan-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 14:08:06 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1622562

Okay, so that headline may not be entirely true – Although, she did turn down that DNA test. – but it is one of the 800 random things Tracy Morgan said during his appearance on Conan last night which are always fucking hilarious. I don’t want to oversell it, but the Charlton Heston bit was Read More ...]]> 5 http://www.thesuperficial.com/good-morning-irina-shayk-and-other-news-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/good-morning-irina-shayk-and-other-news-05-2012#comments Wed, 23 May 2012 13:40:37 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1622081

- A woman’s abs are like magic. - Apparently jabbing your penis into a pile of Silly Putty with tits is the new Faberge Egg. - Weird Things Your Favorite Teen And Child Stars Are Up To Now - So Brad Pitt really has no intention of marrying Angelina Jolie. That’s Read More ...]]> 28 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-tuesday-5-22-12-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/the-crap-we-missed-tuesday-5-22-12-05-2012#comments Tue, 22 May 2012 20:15:46 +0000 Photo Boy http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1621301

Welcome To Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed where Kevin James jumps on the internet’s hottest new meme, ‘Hilling,’ Gerard Butler knows how to make himself look like less of a coked-out whoremonger by comparison, There’s Something About Guy, and holy cow, Bill Paxton really was the international terrorist known as Carlos this whole time! Seriously, Read More ...]]> 439 http://www.thesuperficial.com/miley-cyrus-sex-magic-amanda-de-cadenet-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/miley-cyrus-sex-magic-amanda-de-cadenet-05-2012#comments Tue, 22 May 2012 18:57:50 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1621291

As part of her, “Garsh, I Sure Grow’d Up Tour,” Miley Cyrus stopped by Lifetime’s The Conversation with Amanda de Cadenet where I reckon she done pontifercated and philosophicalized the ins and outs of the daddy-daughter dance for such are its proclivities and the like. Via Page Six: “I was talking about this at dinner Read More ...]]> 43 http://www.thesuperficial.com/kelly-brook-bikini-cannes-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/kelly-brook-bikini-cannes-05-2012#comments Tue, 22 May 2012 18:55:36 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1621491

Here’s Kelly Brook on the set of a photo shoot in Cannes where her breasts looked just gigantic and awesome. I don’t know what random god I pleased to deserve such a bounty, but I’ll bet it has something to do with not blowing that entire Nativity scene while it was sleeping that one Christmas. Read More ...]]> 65 http://www.thesuperficial.com/johnny-depp-tonto-comanche-05-2012 http://www.thesuperficial.com/johnny-depp-tonto-comanche-05-2012#comments Tue, 22 May 2012 18:05:12 +0000 The Superficial http://www.thesuperficial.com/?p=1620961

“Wait. For real? Like the baking powder?” While Johnny Depp may or may not have based part of his Tonto performance on Marilyn Manson, he definitely based it off a painting by an artist who literally just makes up his own Indian outfits because his historical research stops around, “Eh, they probably liked birds.” But Read More ...]]> 33