16 years ago today, my Genius Better Half proposed to me and oh, he got me good! I never saw it coming!

We had been dating for about a year and half at this time. He sent me a dozen red roses at work that Friday with a note saying something to the effect of “you don’t have to wait any more.” I thought he was talking about my birthday present or something (my birthday is in 4 days). Totally clueless.

I drove my Mitsubishi Eclipse to his house after work, thinking we were going to dinner and a movie. I went in and talked with his mom for a bit, while he was doing something? I had no idea. When we left, he walked with me and opened my door. Nothing unusual because he has always been a gentleman and I let him (Side note: He still opens doors for me!). It was a little unusual for us to be taking my car instead of his pickup but I didn’t think anything about it. Totally clueless.

He asked me a few questions and got me distracted talking about myself — which is a nifty little trick he does so he doesn’t have to talk. He said he needed to stop by a softball field to talk with a friend of his for a few minutes. This was quite believable as our lives really revolved around softball at the time.

We pulled up to an empty field, but there was one on the top of the hill where some people were playing. I asked him if we were going up there and kinda wondered why he’d parked so far away. “Nope, we’re going out there.” Totally clueless.

He proceeded to pull out of the trunk: his guitar, a blanket, and a box. OH MY WORD! This was it! How in the world did I not see that he had to put down part of the back seat to fit his guitar in the trunk? He kept me looking forward the entire time he was helping me in the car!

I now interrupt this touching moment with some background. When he and I first started dating, he told me it was really easy for guys to say “I love you” in bed, but to say “I love you” on a softball field, now that really meant something. The first time he wanted to tell me he loved me, he drove to a softball field and took me out in center field to tell me. It was really sweet. Back to this touching moment.

He helped me walk out to center field. I was in high heels because we were, after all, supposed to be going to eat dinner — not a softball field. He laid down the blanket for me to stand on, got out his guitar and sang me a beautiful song to which I cannot remember the name of right now. I’ll find out and let you know. I know — mood buster. But just go with the flow.

After he finished singing, I applauded and cheered. He put his guitar down. He took my hands and began the speech he’d been planning for I don’t know how long. Oh, and of course he was down on one knee. I was so excited between smiling and crying, I didn’t let the poor boy finish his speech before I blurted out “yes I’ll marry you!” We hugged and kissed.

Next he hands me a box. Not just any box. A Victoria’s Secret pink and white striped box — bigger than a jewelry box. I opened it up and there was a tshirt inside that said “Diamonds are a girl’s best friend” with a picture of a softball diamond (you know, the field?). It was absolutely perfect!

Now, lest you think he’s a schmuk for not buying me a ring, he said he agonized over it and really wanted me to be with him to pick out the perfect ring. See, I am not a girlie-girl. Never have been. I don’t wear jewelry — don’t really like rings, etc. and have no clue about diamonds. So he purchased the shirt for me, and then proceeded to take me shopping — after dinner, a girl’s gotta eat! We shopped and shopped and learned everything there is to know about diamonds, and in the end, he bought me a really nice, really big diamond. I tried talking him into something smaller, but he refused and bought a really nice ring.

It was an absolutely unique and beautiful proposal. I knew after he and I had been dating for 2 months that I wanted to marry him — it took him a little longer to get to that point, but that was due to a past bad relationship. So, I cut him some slack 

Oh yeah, when we sat down to eat, I called Mom and Dad to tell them the news. You know what? They already knew. He had driven out to my parents’ house without me knowing, and asked Dad for my hand in marriage. I have definitely got a Keeper. So back off you single women — he’s mine!

In October, we will celebrate 16 years of marriage, and nowadays, that’s really an accomplishment. So many couples around us are getting divorced. I thank God that He’s kept us together this long and I pray that God strengthens our marriage every day.

Hugs and kisses to you, My Genius Better Half! You gave me a wonderful memory when you proposed  and even more wonderful memories have followed!

With all good intentions (story of my life), I tried as best I as I could to unplug between Christmas and New Year’s. I had to take care of a few little things for clients, but those I had planned on. For the most part, I didn’t accomplish anything else I had thought I might get to do — writing blog posts for here…writing blog posts for DIY Ministry…writing ebooks…and that was just Day 1

I knew I would be busy as soon as I said I was coming back. The client work was already piling up. Starting off the year behind. That was no different. And then to top it off I’ve been sick the past week. You would be proud of me though — I did take 2 full days “off work” to sleep and try to kick this virus’ booty.

Sharing all of this to say, I still don’t have my stuff together. I know deep in my heart that to fight the slow fade, I need to be spending more time with God. I need to read at least one scripture a day … and not the kind of read that just glosses over it like I’ve already read that one a million times. I do want to share scripture here but realistically I know I will not be able to do one a day like I had hoped. So I’m going to share one of my favorite scriptures with you and ask that you share one with me in the comments. Then if 6 of you leave scriptures in the comments, I’ll have one to read every day this week

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” — Matthew 6:33

Really I just need to concentrate on the first part “seek first the kingdom of God.”

Just step away from the keyboard lady…

Anyway, I’ll be back the first of the year with verses for each day. Duck, Doodle and I wish you and your family a very Merry CHRISTmas and Happy New Year!

Before I continue, let me make something clear. The video depicts a husband having an affair and leaving his family. That is not why it would be my theme song. Duck and I are very happily married (15 years now). Showing how an affair can break up a family is just one illustration of the song they could have given. So let me explain why it would be my theme song.

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade

For me, the slow fade happened after I accepted Jesus in my heart. I invited Him in to be a part of my life, every minute of every day. Then little by little (the slow fade), I started taking back a minute here or there. Thinking about what I wanted to do instead of what God would want me to do. Then little by little, I got mad with God over some things that happened and started taking back more minutes from Him.

Until one day shortly after I turned 30, I was in a bad place. The farthest from God I had ever been except when I lived without Jesus. I knew I had Jesus and no man could ever take that away, but I had spent so long believing little white lies that I was ready to leave this world and be with Jesus.

The journey to that place did not happen in one minute. One day. Or even one week. It was a slow fade. A choice made to sleep in late and not read my Bible. A choice to not go to church that Sunday and stay home to do laundry. A choice to think about how I could solve my own problems instead of talking with God about them. A choice to think God was punishing me for something I had done wrong.

That was 8 years ago. I started doing some things that helped me fight the slow fade and get back to the point where I was close to God again. I wish I could say that I’ve stayed there … close to God … but I haven’t. I have felt myself fading back and it’s extremely frustrating. I know what I need to do, yet I just don’t do it.

I decided to turn this blog into a place where I share with you some of my struggles and how I am fighting the slow fade. One of the biggest lies that the devil can feed us is that we are alone in what we’re thinking, what we’re feeling, and what we’re going through. The truth is we are never alone. I don’t want you to feel alone so if you can relate to my struggles, then we can pray for each other and help each other fight the slow fade.

One of the most important tools for fighting the slow fade is scripture.

For the word of God [is] living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. — Hebrews 4:12 (NKLV)

I have gotten away from reading my Bible. Starting January 1st, I will be posting a scripture here. I may comment on it. I may not. I don’t think my words are all that important, but I may want to share something about the scripture. So, if you would rather not have another email to deal with, please unsubscribe. You will not hurt my feelings — really. I don’t pay attention to the numbers anyway.

Now tell me something about you. Can you relate to the slow fade? What is one small thing you could do today to refocus on Jesus?

I hope you like it. It’s really me, and I haven’t been able to say that about any designs really! You’ll always find me in jeans, with a Coke, and my phone is probably not too far away I am always leaning on God and trying to remember in the busyness of life that I just need to be simply His.

Of course time got away from me and I didn’t write all that I had wanted to write. Tip: Don’t wait to write! Ever! If you have the thought, get it written down because I did not. And when I had the time to write, the thoughts, they left me! I’m sure I’ll be making slight adjustments here and there

My new tagline is “fighting the slow fade.” I’ll write more about what that means this week.

Come hang out with me! You can see the many places to do so in the right column over there. Of course, Pinterest and Google+ are new to me and I don’t know how much I’ll use them. I’m somewhat regular on Facebook and Twitter though. Hope to see you around!