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Hope you have enjoyed viewing these examples of street art in Glasgow – although it is always best to see it in person. As to who was responsible for doing it all, well, the eagle-eyed amongst you will have noticed the signs that say ‘the style mile’ & TPA, which also contains a website adress – www.smug-life.com – at this present time going to that website that says ‘Site Under Construction’.

Ex-Wife’s Wedding Dress

This wedding dress you see in the picture above is one of the weirdest things sold on the internet to this date. Most of the time it wouldn’t be unusual to see a wedding dress for sale on the internet, but in this case it was very odd. The man in the picture modeled his Ex-wife’s wedding dress on the internet trying to sell it. After many bids from bizarre people the dress ended up selling for the price of 3,850 dollars. That is crazy.

Britney Spears’ Chewed Gum

Another very bizarre item sold on the internet was, the famous pop star, Brittany Spears chewing gum. Brittany Spears, shown in the picture above, dispensed of her chewing gum in a London Hotel where an unknown person picked it up as a souvenir of the famous pop star. Later the gum chewed by Brittany found its way to the internet where it sold to a crazed fan for $263. Today the chewing gum is framed in the buyers’ house. Money well spent.

USAF Hughes AIM-4D Falcon Missile

Yes I know exactly what you’re thinking, Is that a real missile? Yes it is true a USAF Hughes AIM-4D Falcon Missile was auctioned off on the internet. The missile was like the ones seen in the picture above. The missile was sold to a lucky buyer who paid a whopping $3,950 for it. The missile was disarmed before the sale so it could never be made back into an explosive device. I’m not sure who the buyer or seller was but I know they sure were crazy.

Pretend Monster in Child’s Closet

Bizarre enough a pretend monster from a closet was sold on the internet in early 2007. This pretend monster was sold so the sellers’ child could sleep at night. The sellers young child thought that there was a real monster in the closet and was unable to sleep because of it. The point of the sale was to trick the child in thinking it was gone. I have no other details on the sale besides the fact in which the monster was sold. The monster could have looked like the one in the image above.

Giant Corn Flake Shaped Like Indiana

The image above shows another odd item sold on the internet, a cornflake shaped like Indiana. In Virginia two sisters sold an Illinois-shaped corn flake in hopes of striking it rich. This odd auction had many bidders and attracted lots of publicity. In the end the famous cornflake sold for $1,350 to Jon Wolf who takes it on a road show. Since the sale there have been many copy cat sales including and a potato chip shaped like Florida and a Dorito shaped like Texas. These auctions have not done nearly as well.

George Washington’s Hair

The image in the picture above shows the first president in the United States. Recently four strands reportedly clipped from George Washington’s head were sold on the internet. There is not proof weather or not it is his real hair but the bidding still went on. It is believed that the hair had been snipped from Washington’s head when he was briefly disinterred in 1837. After the auction was complete the four strands of hair was sold for 17 thousand dollars. This is unbelievable.

Used Dentures

Last year in 2007 an elderly guy sold his used dentures on the internet. They ended up being sold for $38.99 to a buyer who could put them to good use. It is unknown if the buyer ever used the dentures but it sure is odd. The dentures that were sold looked much like the ones shown in the picture above.

A Penis-Shaped Cheeto

I don’t want to be nasty or anything, but this picture and auction is real. A penis shaped Cheeto, in the picture above, was sold on the internet by a disgusting seller in late 2007. I don’t know who bought or sold the cheeto but I do know it was sold for only $1.25. I would really like to know what the buyer did with the odd item. All I know is that Cheeto’s are supposed to be a cheesy delicious snack not a perverted disgusting one.

Stuffed Two-Headed Calf

Recently a stuffed two headed calf was put up for sale on the internet. The Calf was born in Virginia and was given to the seller in 1995 to settle a family debt. The calf has been preserved in a glass case and has a card for authenticity. The seller started the bidding at 20,000 dollars. The two headed calf received zero bids and is still on the market. The calf may have looked like the one in the picture above.

Goat Toenail Bracelet

There have been a lot of weird things sold on the internet in the past but this has to be one of the weirdest. A Goat Toenail Bracelet from Guatemala was put up for sale on the internet. The toenails were freshly cut off a goat like the one in the picture above. The bizarre piece of all natural jewelry had a detailed description and was said to make a funny noise when shaken. The starting bid was set at $9.99 and the piece of jewelry received no bids.

1. Insist that your work email address be changed to KingElvis@companyname.com, HitlerRocks@companyname.com, or Ilikebigbutts@companyname.com.

2. Page yourself over the loudspeaker or intercom several times each day: “Jim Smith please come to Jim Smith’s desk for a consultation.”

3. Label your desk trashcan as “Inbox” and place atop your desk.

4. Ask your boss if he/she would like fries with that whenever you’re asked to do something. 

5. Tell your boss you’ve just been diagnosed with Papyrophobia (note this would include a shrieking scream at the sight of a piece of paper.)

6. Switch the coffee maker to decaf for two or three weeks, and then switch it to espresso.

7. Begin your sentences with the phrase “according to the guide for bipolar potential mass murderers with  odd sexual fetishes ….”

8. Drop all the punctuation from your reports, memos, and the alike.

9.  Skip to and from your desk singing  “a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down, medicine go doo-wwww-nn.”

10. Ask your co-workers if they work here and for how long. No matter the answer, give em a wink and gut laugh.

11. Compose an email every time you go to the bathroom, including what stall you’ll be in; lunch, including a full list of what you plan to eat and drink; water cooler; snack machine; etc.. Hit “send all” each time!

12. Call the Human Resources Department. Tell them you’re human today and would like to know what resources they have for you – check, cash, money order, cashiers check, direct deposit, coupons, or vouchers.

13. When you see your boss coming toward you, yell out that she told me to do it and point to a flower pot.

14. When your boss asks what’s wrong with you, tell him/her you’ve been hearing voices that keep warning you about the voices in his/her head. 

15. Go into your boss’s office in your birthday suit and tell him/her that the poor economy has left you no choice but to downsize your wardrobe expenses.

If you aren’t fired by the time you get to number 15 on this list, then your boss has obviously read it too and is working his/her own way down it. Good luck, and please don’t eat the daisies!

Whether you just want a holiday “for the rest of us” or you’re the biggest Seinfeld fan in the world, celebrate Festivus on Dec. 23 with the following activities. No pressure.

Festivus Pole

Possibly the only required purchase during Festivus celebrations is the Festivus pole, which is made from aluminum and has a high strength-to-weight ratio.  Purchase one, made of 100 percent domestically produced aluminum, here for $39.95. The pole is not decorated in any way, and essentially, it’s occasionally looked at but not really admired.

Festivus Dinner

Like other holidays, Festivus officially begins with a large meal. What you serve is up to you, but in “The Strike,” the meat de jour was meatloaf. The original dinner in the O’Keefe house was turkey or ham, followed by a storebought cake decorated with M&Ms.

Airing of Grievances

In the opposite tradition of Thanksgiving, where family members take turns saying what they’re thankful for, Festivus calls for the Airing of Grievances, in which each person tells everyone else at the Festivus meal how they’ve been disappointed over the past year.

Feats of Strength

Though it doesn’t seem like the best timing, right after the holiday meal, the head of the household challenges one person of his choice at the Festivus celebration to a wrestling match. Tradition says that Festivus does not end until the head of the household is pinned in a wrestling match.

Festivus Miracles

You can’t plan a Festivus miracle. It just has to happen – but when it does, you’ll know.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the flat,
not a creature was stirring, not even the cat.
The bills were all piled by the chimney with care,
In hope that the dosh for them soon would be there.

 Sleeping Cat   Stacked bills

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Angry Birds ™ danced in their heads.
And Mum with her vodka,  I with my nightcap,
Had addled our poor brains for a long winter’s nap.

  A choice nightcap

When out in the street there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the curtains and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to dust bins below.
When, what to my bloodshot eyes should appear,
But a tiny black cab, with eight flashing reindeer.

     Dustbins in the snow      Black cab

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick.
More rapid than DLR his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them weird names!

 London cabbie..or is it St Nick?

Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid! on Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the steps! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So up to the roof-top the reindeer they flew,
With the cab full of Toys, and St Nicholas too.

 A traditional St Nicholas

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Through the front door St Nicholas came with a bound.

 A famous front door

He was dressed all in black, from his head to his foot,
Cos his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of goods he had flung on his back,
He looked like a day trader, and opened his pack.

 A modern St Nick?

His eyes they were bloodshot! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were all veined, his nose like a cherry!
His mouth with stained teeth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

The stump of a cig he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little beer belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!

 Guess who?

He was chubby and fat, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!
A wink of his eye and a nod of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And paid all of the bills, then turned with a jerk.
And he laid some new games on all the sprogs beds,
And giving a nod, out the front door he sped!

 Paying the bills   An Angry Bird

He sprang to his cab, to his team gave a shout,
And away they all went like a light going out
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
‘Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!’

 A posh wreath from Fortnum and Mason

Spay/neuter your pets! Shelter strays may get euthanised if not adopted.

http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/pet_overpopulation/facts/why_spay_neuter.html

http://www.battersea.org.uk/cats/

1. Jimmy Savile invented the disco!

Yep, as strange as that may sound, it was Jimmy Savile that invented the disco. I’m sure we have all at one point in our life’s been to a disco and we really have to thank Jimmy Savile for that because at the age of 18 Jimmy Savile became the first person to organise an event for people to dance to records (rather than live bands). He charged a shilling for entrance to this first ever disco and the rest, as they say, is history.

Image via Wikipedia

2. Jimmy Savile was the the first presenter of Top Of The Pops!

New Year’s Day 1964 saw the launch of Top Of The Pops, BBC’s attempt at a music chart television programme, and Jimmy Savile was the host. The weekly show continued until 2006 and a Christmas special is still run every year. Apart from hosting Top Of The Pops, Jimmy Savile was also the host of Pop Goes The Sixties, a programme made by the BBC shown on 31st December 1969 which looked back at the music of the swinging 60’s – a decade of music that Jimmy Savile helped oversee.

3. Jimmy Savile appeared on This Is Your Life twice!

The UK version of This Is Your Life first hit the airwaves in 1955 and was last seen in 2007. In between times many celebrities have featured on the show. Jimmy Savile managed to feature on the programme twice because the production team were not aware that he had already appeared on the show previously!

4. Jimmy Savile died in 1994!

Well, comedian Chris Morris read out a broadcast on BBC Radio 1 in 1994 that stated that Jimmy Savile had died and subsequently read out an obituary. The hoax was soon spotted an Chris Morris had to offer a grovelling apology after Jimmy Savile threatened legal action.

5. Jimmy Savile was quite the sportsman!

Although Jimmy Savile will be best remembered for his television work, his sporting talents should not be forgotten. He is said to have ran 212 marathons, participated in over 300 bike runs and even had 107 professional fights. In 1951 Jimmy Savile entered the Tour Of Britain Cycle Race – which he didn’t win.  Jimmy Savile also holds the record for the fastest time to run up the BT Tower in London.

6. Jimmy Savile has raised a fortune for charities.

In 40 years of raising money for charities, Jimmy Savile has used his fame to raise over £40 million. 

7. You can dress as Jimmy Savile for Halloween.

In 2009 Jimmy Savile put his name to a licenced Halloween costume of himself. Don’t believe me? Here it is:

8. Jimmy Savile once fixed it for a girl to become a gerbil!

What else can you say to that!

9. Jimmy Savile broke the smoking ban sort of!

In 2008 Jimmy Savile, famed for smoking cigars, boasted of having smoked a cigar in a shop, after the smoking ban had been introduced in the UK banning such shenanigans. However, he wasn’t doing anything illegal, instead, Jimmy Savile was just using a ‘loophole’ in the law that allowed the lighting up of cigars in a cigar shop.

10. Jimmy Savile was actually the person Stan was writing to in the Eminem song!

Well, not really, but the Alistair McGowan spoof of the Eminem song Stan is awesome.

R.I.P Sir Jimmy Savile

I am a 65-year-old man living in the great state of Montana and I am starting to worry that I am becoming addicted to computer porn. I look at it basically all day, aside from when I am cooking and tending to my vegetable patch of course. All those beauties just a click away, I can’t resist. To make matters worse, my internet connection is very slow, so much of my day is spent just waiting for my sexy videos to buffer. We don’t get DSL out here so I am considering relocating out of the great state of Montana. My cousin in Indiana tells me he has high-speed internet out there, so maybe that would be a good spot for me. I have contacted my congressman about getting DSL in our county (I told him it was for academic research but I don’t think he believed me as I was looking pretty sex-crazed at the time). I am not sure if I should move to Indiana or try watching porn videos that are not so high-res. Please help me.

Cordially,

Bob from Butte

***

Dear Bob from Butte,

First, you should not feel bad or ashamed about your situation. We are all addicted to computer porn to some degree. Believe it or not, I actually flunked out of college because I was trying to run my own amateur porn site. It was called Roger’s Room, I forget why, and it had probably the best selection of amateur porn vids on the web. Unfortunately, I went with a really cheap web host so my site was down like half of the time, and also I faced a lot of backlash over this toilet cam I had planned to set up. As far as your situation goes, I think moving to Indiana sounds like it could be fun, especially if you have family there. Or you could try going old-school and maybe subscribing to Penthouse or Swank or something. There is definitely something about the feel of the printed page, which is why I refuse to buy a Kindle. Best of luck to you!

Sincerely,

Brian

Love him or hate him, Gadaffi was one of the oddest Despot’s of all time. During his time in power one thing remained the same, his bizarre fashion.

Above the highly decorated Gadaffi, of course all his military accolades were all invented by himself.

Above Gadaffi sports a strange robe/dungaree combination, in brown!

In camouflage, but look again the green patterns are his beloved Africa.

During his high profile period, where he appeared to be making amends, Gadaffi took to dressing down, and living in a tent… A tent next to his palace of course.

A Versace suit, covered by tribal gown and hat. A combination of cutting edge fashion, and respect for tradition.

Towards the end many speculated on his sanity, he’d often sleep through important meetings, and in the above shot, he could easily pass for Lionel Ritchie. Mirrored shades covered his closed eyes.

In purple robes, Gadaffi is flanked by one of his many female bodyguards. Towards the end, just prior to the revolution in Libya all of his key security figures were women.

Again a decorated appearance, and all the medals were either invented or self awarded, despite the fact that Colonel Gadaffi, very rarely saw battle, even in the early days.

Building bridges with the Labour Government of the UK (with a hidden oil deal behind the scenes). This was one of the last times Gadaffi met with British officials, despite the “ground breaking”, new Prime Minister David Cameron declined a visit. In the above outfit, Gadaffi sports a robe, with a suit on top, and another robe on top of that.

He is gone, murdered by his own countries people, angry at his years of control over the country, the killings, the corruption, rape, terrorism, and dodgy deals.

I was no fan of Gadaffi, but I’ll miss his atrocities against fashion, the man really knew how to amuse an audience, by simply getting dressed.

Image by taberandrew via Flickr

The Cookie Jar Challenge

Billy Ray, would you get your hand out of that cookie jar? Supper will be ready in half an hour and I have a good supper to put on the table. You run on out in the yard and play with your brother. I’ll call you in to wash up in a few minutes. Wait a minute, did I tell you that Aunt Grace called from the city and left her telephone number.

She wants you to call her soon. She asked if you could come one weekend to go to the zoo with your cousin Horace. You know how they like you to visit them. She said Horace had begged for you to come ever since they moved away. I told her you missed Horace too. It did make me feel bad to tell such a big lie. I felt like the biggest hypocrite in the county.

I know how much you dislike spending time with Horace but I just hated to hurt her feelings. Will you forgive me sugar? You don’t have to go if you don’t want to. We can say you have something to do at school or your dad has tickets for a ball game. It’s a shame your aunt Grace is so sweet and has that nasty little boy. I can’t imagine where that child got it from. I know it wasn’t from our side of the family.

At last the secret of the world you have been searching for in an article you do not have to pay to read. Be warned though, if you don’t read it and then make one of the typical link spamming comments, everyone everywhere will know you are a complete and utter idiot.

Now, you’ll have to read every, single, solitary word we type from here to the end to have the secret of the world you have been searching for all your life. After reading every last word the secret will be yours to do what you like with. of course we are only joking. We are just setting a trap for the idiot who don’t read articles but, no matter what the article contains, comment “nice info”, “great share”, “I like it” or any number of lame, stupid comments which show, beyond reasonable doubt, that they have not read the article. 

Image via Wikipedia

They really think that if you see their link beneath as many articles as they can spam that you will take your time and go and read their profile and a selection of their poorly written and pointless articles. So the secret of the world is blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

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