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Premier League Name Translator: #11 Frank Forges

Rob Parker — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 12:31:06 +0000

Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name In the real world, he is the top-flight’s ultimate cultured midfielder: the heartbeat of the team with outstanding passing vision. After going through the Premier League Name Translator he sound more like a League Two clogger whose idea [...]

Kieron Dyer - the only decent piece of business Newcastle have ever done?

Rob Parker — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 10:22:24 +0000

West Ham’s financial woes summarised neatly by ex-Magpie Newcastle’s transfer dealings over recent years have hardly been awe-inspiring. The process has usually involved paying over the odds for a player, watching them flop and leave on the cheap, or watching them do pretty well and selling them for less than was originally paid for them. Kieron Dyer [...]

Mocking your coach is not the way off the subs’ bench

Rob Parker — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:40:17 +0000

Valencia squad share an in-joke Valencia’s Portuguese defender Miguel would probably rather be starting matches than sitting on the bench. But if he wants to force his way into coach Unai Emery’s line-up, he might consider not getting caught mocking him on TV. As Emery stalked the touchline clapping enthusiastically at anyone and anything, Miguel nudges his [...]

Premier League Name Translator: #10 Lewis Gooddeath

Rob Parker — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 12:38:38 +0000

Cutting through the exotic monikers of Premier League imports so you can judge the player, not the name Throughout his career in England, the West Ham striker has battled against cruel accusations that his name was in some way related to a dead snake. It is not. Unless the snake in question had one helluva death. That’s [...]

Video: AZ Alkmaar’s Pontus Wernbloom scores a fantastic own goal against Feyenoord

Rob Parker — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 09:40:15 +0000

Clinical finishing… against his own keeper Just when we thought Portsmouth were the world authority on own goals, up pops this beaut from AZ Alkmaar’s Pontus Wernbloom. The Swedish midfielder has played as a striker and showed his goalscoring prowess when the ball broke to him on the edge of the box. Quick as a flash [...]

The bookies where adultery is a dead cert

Rob Parker — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 09:33:49 +0000

Window dressing courtesy of the News of the World This Northern Irish bookmakers has thus far shown a loyalty to the stars of its window display which the subjects did not afford to their wives. Let’s hope the frisky horse on the left is not going to be the next sporting star to fall foul of [...]

Video: John Terry innuendo bingo with Garth Crooks

Rob Parker — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 09:22:03 +0000

MOTD 2 pundit Garth Crooks either has a bit of a laugh at John Terry’s expense or really ought to give a bit more consideration to his turn of phrase in the light of recent events!

Top 10 conclusions Premier League weekend 6-7 February

Rob Parker — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 08:30:45 +0000

1. It wasn’t what you would call a good send-off. 2. Talking of send-offs, the two players red-carded in the Merseyside derby can feel very hard done by. It must have been a token gesture by Martin Atkinson. 3. That latest round of results has really shaken things up. Who could have envisaged a top four like [...]

Video: Marc Wilson’s volleyed own goal against Manchester United

Rob Parker — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 17:21:04 +0000

A helping hand for United Portsmouth were never going to be favourites against Manchester United, but they made extra sure that the home side secured all three points by weighing in with what is likely to go down as a hat-trick of own goals. Marc Wilson scored the pick of the bunch. Video via 101GG [...]

John Terry holds up very prophetic copy of The Sun

Rob Parker — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:30:20 +0000

It was The Sun wot done it The thought that John Terry’s extra-marital affair was all a desperate ploy to create more publicity for the now ex-England skipper hadn’t crossed our minds… until now. Here is JT on the front cover of The Sun to signal him agreeing to write a column for them. The paper he [...]