This is the “batara,” and it’s not on the menu. I only know about it because my first time here, a nice Brazilian lady clued me in on the secret off-menu items. I took a picture of my batara then and have been using that photo to place my order ever since.

“Why isn’t it on the menu?” I ask tonight.

“Because it’s special,” was the answer.

And then the staff convinced me to have some sake, served cold in a wooden box. And then an “ebiten” (deep-fried shrimp roll) and then the tender belly of some very delicious yellowtail.

Very convincing, these Brazilians. Very.

The Verdict:I might be slightly high on seafood as I write this. GO!

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I was lucky today. I had an errand to run and they told me to come back in 30 minutes. So I went in search of tacos to kill some time. I thought for sure I’d find tacos somewhere.

But instead I found Chickpea, just west of Damen on Chicago Ave. So I paid $4 (!!!) and had the best falafel I’ve had since Hoxton Beach on Whitecross Street in London. And that’s saying a lot because Hoxton Beach is sort of awesome.

The vibe at Chickpea was pretty great too. All old action movie posters, in Arabic. And cool dangly lights. I liked it. I think you will too.

The Verdict: Go!

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Back to Brazil  in March. I like the food in Brazil. (Name me a country where I don’t like the food! I am too easy. But I do really like the food in Brazil.) Here’s where I ate and drank.

Living Lounge Bar & Sushi, Renaissance Hotel, Jardins. The sushi here was very good, but it was the staff that got me smiling, plying me with free treats even though my basic sushi set of the usual suspects was really enough for two people. The Verdict: Not a destination, but convenient for the business traveler.

Figueira Rubaiyat, Haddock Lobo, Jardins. My colleague Paul and I dropped in here for a late lunch and boy, were we disappointed. Can I say RIP OFF. Ridiculously expensive for what I can only call “wedding buffet food.” Without the buffet. My fish was overcooked but really, it was the price more than anything that galled me. I think we paid something ridiculous like $40 each for our entrees. That being said, the bar was nice and I would go to the bar again. The Verdict: Skip it. Yes, even if it has a big tree and it’s in all the guidebooks and you can sit outdoors and everything.  SKIP IT.

Margherita’s, Alameda Tiete, Jardins. We loved the pizza, the service, and the big convenient buckets of beer at this crowded and lively Sunday night spot. (It’s also open the rest of the week, but Paulistas like their pizza on Sunday nights.) The Verdict: Fun. Go.

Cantina do Piero, Haddock Lobo, Jardins. Right across from the Renaissance. My colleague and I split a quick lunch here before heading to the airport for Rio. Sao Paulo is expensive, bu this place was super-expensive and really, all we had was some pasta in tomato sauce. The servers were of the handsome older variety, which I like. And really, the food was simple and good. But the price kinda killed me. The Verdict: Not a must, but convenient if you’re staying at The Renaissance.

Oba, Rua Dr. Melo Alves, Jardins. My Brazilian friends Nerone and Ellen (who I first met in Chicago many years ago) took me to this gorgeous restaurant in Jardins for an extremely lovely dinner. The food is meant to represent Brazil’s diverse cultural influences. The menu, which changes frequently, was somewhere in between Mexico and Thailand when we visited. I loved my tacos and I just loved the overall vibe and feel of the place. (That’s Oba in the photo above.) The Verdict: Go.

Lellis Trattoria, Av Campinas, Jardins. Nerone and Elen didn’t entirely want to go here because they had just been, but I had a flight to catch and we couldn’t get into anywhere else in Jardins. (Saturday lunchtime, apparently very popular.) I loved the handsome older waiters and the tile walls and just the old-school vibe of the place. Also loved our food. Elen warned me that the portions would be huge and I should have listened. We started with a basic salad, dressed perfectly, and then I ordered some fish and broccoli which was deceptively simple, but oh so good. (In contrast to Figueira, where the food was simple, but bland.) In short, I really liked it here. It’s not trendy or sceney — it’s more the type of place where you’d do a family lunch — but it’s very very good. The Verdict: Go.

I am back to Brazil shortly, so there’s more to come. Plus, I still need to tell you about RIO.

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I was debating how to do this, how to tell you about the El Bulli kitchen table menu at Next which I enjoyed (understatement) on Friday night. I mean, sure, I took a lot of pictures. (They are all over here on my Facebook fan page.) I even shot some video, and thanks to Roam & Home’s suggestion, I even pepped the videos up a bit using the 8mm app on the iPhone. (See Maytag Blue Egg, Mint Pond, and the literal goodbye of the Marshmallow Gloves, all over on YouTube.) I had to remove the sound from the videos because in one, I’m singing Tainted Love (best song ever), and in another, I sound like I’m missing a few points off my IQ when I ask where the cheese is. (The egg is MADE of cheese. ) I blame the cava. And the wine. And the sake. And the cider. And, uh, the sherry and the beer.

I had favorite dishes, like the black sesame spongecake with miso, eaten with your hands. You can make this yourself in the microwave, our tremendously awesome server Bobby told us. (My friend Shinny has been making cake in her rice cooker a lot lately. I like these non-traditional baking methods.) Always a sucker for unagi, I loved the nasturtium with eel, bone marrow and cucumber. I don’t know if it’s the sourcing or the preparation, but this was the best bit of eel I’ve ever had.

I loved the surprise of the carrot foam. It was like eating nothing, but eating something that was very, well, something. I wanted to bathe in the liquid from the suquet of prawns; we were licking it off the plate with our fingers before they took the plates away. And I wanted to — get this — try to reproduce the potato tortilla at home, so comforting and silky it was. A mouth feel like no other.

I loved the fun of the spice quiz and the spooky but whimsical goodbye of the marshmallow gloves.  I loved that Next lets you buy the beer from the meal — a special brew from Half Acre flavored with beets and oranges — so I bought two bottles at the end for $15 each. (See the reviews on Beer Advocate.)

I also loved that I was invited to the kitchen table by Karen of Roam & Home, someone I’d never met before but whose aesthetic I’ve always very much admired. (I am borrowing her idea of posting the menu. I was going to post all the photos, but there are too many. An album on Facebook is easier.) I am forever grateful to you, Karen. And to Bob too. Hi Bob!!

Being low on cash at the end of the night (five hours after we began) and feeling in the mood for another special treat, I ordered myself an Uber cab – they charge my credit card directly for everything and no cash changes hands — and I headed home in that dark silence of classical music and leather.

The music here is a bit more intense than my Uber “cab,” but here’s the official Next video for El Bulli if you are interested:

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I bought the Vitamix a few months ago because Twitter told me to. I wanted a strong blender that could crush ice.

Yes, I wanted a blender purely so I could make frozen margaritas.

But then the Vitamix arrived and I figured out that the damn thing was so powerful, you could make anything in it. No cooking skills necessary. So for example, for today’s asparagus and mushroom soup, I cut a bunch of asparagus in half and threw it in the microwave for two minutes. Then I threw it in the Vitamix along with a cup of chicken broth, a cup of water, a splash of whole milk, and a splash of white wine.

Then I remembered I had some leftover shiitake mushrooms and some corn salsa so I threw that in there as well.

30 seconds and some freshly grated pecorino, some salt and pepper, and three asparagus tips saved for use in the photograph, I had soup. (I did microwave it for 30 seconds to warm it up. The Vitamix is actually so powerful that if you keep blending, the soup will heat itself up, but then my apartment ends up sounding like an airport so I just use the microwave.)

Not bad if I do say so myself.

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I went to the kitchen and opened a leftover fortune cookie and this is what it said.

My friends Aileen and Christina brought me tulips for my birthday yesterday. I watered them.

Then I cut up some fruit for juicing. I’ve been juicing a lot lately. Have you seen “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead” yet? You should. It’s good. And I cant get over how much better everyone’s faces look after a few days of juicing. By the way, ginger is awesome.  (Top right.)

I went to make some coffee. There was a note inside my coffee container. It’s like God is psychic or something.

I went downtown to meet a friend for more coffee. On the way to meet him, I stopped to smell the flowers. We ended up not drinking coffee. I had some water while we talked. He told me I need to ask people more questions.

I took a taxi to the Four Seasons. I’ve never been to the Four Seasons Chicago before. It’s much nicer than The Ritz, which is puzzling because The Ritz is always so crowded but it’s like it’s 1983 at The Ritz…all peach and gold. I booked myself in for a massage and a facial at the Four Seasons spa. My 80 minute massage passed amazingly quickly. My facial was good — they rubbed some sort of cream made out of amethysts all over my face and then rubbed it off with an electric current (I can’t make this stuff up, really) — but there was too much downtime. Me, I don’t like the steam.

The almonds and cucumber water in the relaxation room, on the other hand, were DELICIOUS. I ate a lot of almonds today. And I don’t even really like almonds. The dried cranberries were also nice. Oh, and so was the tea. The tea was quite nice. Although the glasses were quite small. They were so small that I thought they were cups for the almonds. You know, like when you ride at the front of the plane. The staff saw me trying to eat almonds out of their teacups. I was embarrassed.

It was 3:45 and I still hadn’t had lunch yet. So I went downstairs to the lobby bar and had some champagne and talked to my dad on the phone. He’s going to use his frequent flier miles to go to China. And he’s going to send me a Nike Fuel Band for my birthday. Or a Fitbit. People on Amazon seem to like the Fitbit better. Hmmm.

I had the best deviled egg I’ve ever had in my entire life at the Four Seasons Chicago. And I don’t even LIKE deviled eggs.

$24 worth of salad. It was a very good salad though.

Best part! Lemon bars. I am not a dessert person, but lemon anything gets me every time. And only $3!!!

My friend Eileen came and we had “New Fashioneds” together at the bar with the businessmen. Eagle Rare Bourbon (I like bourbon), Grand Marnier, Luxardo maraschino cherries, cherry bitter. Nice.

Then we walked around for a bit. It was a little foggy and mysterious downtown. Just like us.

I stared at these shoes for a while. Hermes. Right. Moving on…

And then I found some street art! In the Gold Coast of all places. A good feeling.

And then I took a taxi home, had some leftover Singapore noodles, and listened to Amy Winehouse’s “Lioness” and was in bed by 9:30 pm.

A good day.

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Time for a break. Too many restaurants, too little time. And I’m TIRED. I know, I know. What happened to all your photos, Krista? What happened to full blog write-ups?  Frankly speaking, no one restaurant has driven me to such great lengths in a long time. So micro-reviews it is for you. For now. Personally, I kinda like the micro-review thing. It’s like Twitter. Or a Haiku. (A long one.)

Benny’s Chop House, 444 N. Wabash, River North (ish, because I kinda feel like Wabash is a bit of a wasteland and even though it’s north of the river, it’s still in The Loop, isn’t it?). When I was looking for new kitchen knobs in December (yes, I’m very domestic like that), I met Benny himself in a hardware store and made a mental note to stop in to his restaurant sometime. In return for the name and phone number of his handyman and all. So I did. (Although I never called his handyman.) It was a weekend afternoon and the place was EMPTY. I sat at the bar and had a burger. And it was so flavorless, it was sad. The bun was good though, as were the fries. (Served in their own miniature basket for frying! Genius!) But really, all I wanted was some salt and pepper. BUT wait. The PRICE. The price was kind of amazingly right. $10 for a burger and fries that is certainly better than Mickey D’s. I mean, for that, I might just have to go back. Even though the bar area kinda felt like a bad 2008 Chicago condo kitchen installation. The Verdict: If you like value for money, sit at the bar and get a burger, but ask for salt and pepper and all that other stuff.

Irazu, 1865 N. Milwaukee, Bucktown. Everyone told me I would love Irazu, one of Chicago’s only Costa Rican restaurants. Well, I didn’t. It all felt a bit unkempt and dingy, and our table was unsteady, so that was annoying. And my tilapia tacos were probably about the most underwhelming thing I’ve eaten so far in 2012. (Tilapia. In a taco. With a lot of overcooked onions. No thank you.) My friend Amy got that oatmeal shake that everyone raves about and I thought, “Gee, it’s just like drinking cold oatmeal.” The Verdict: Meh. Not so exciting. Not sure why it’s so packed.

Maza, 2415 N. Ashland, Sort of Lincoln Park-ish. I will admit to a total bias. I used to live by the old Maza on Lincoln and I always loved it. You might know my greatest goal is to go to Lebanon at some point in the near future. And I am also a sucker for hummus. So it was that I found myself at the new Maza at Ashland & Fullerton, where I heard the incredibly sad story of the owner losing the lease on his old space in West Lakeview. The landlord on Lincoln wanted a monthly sum that no sole proprietor could ever agree to. So Maza moved. And the old space remains unoccupied still. Greedy bastards. Well, bygones because we had fun at Maza and I loved my assortment of food, just like I did in the old days. I love that it’s this guy’s restaurant and it always has been and he works there all the time.  The Verdict: Support a local businessman and go. (And really, ignore the Yelp reviews.) Sadly, the proprietor hasn’t been back to Lebanon in 30+ years.

I’ve got more. A lot more. Coming up: Storefront Company, RPM Italian, and the part where I nearly die on a bar stool at Yusho. And a lot of other places that I can’t even remember at the moment. Hmmm.

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Tavernita and it’s little neighbor, Pinxtos, 151 W Erie. Tavernita is one of those huge, sceney River North spaces. I would not attempt a place like this on a weekend, so my friend Eileen and I dropped in here min-week. Our servers were many AND overbearing. Can you just let a girl eat, please? But the food was GREAT. I especially liked the escalavida (eggplant, red peppers, hazelnut romesco, goat cheese) and “greg’s meatballs” (wagyu beef pork and more hazelnut romesco.) Not a place to take your parents unless they are the hip and happening sort, but fun nonetheless. I also really like the bar, particularly if you can get a stool. The Verdict: Fun. Good fun. And good food.

Publican Quality Meats, 825 W Fulton Market. Dropped in for lunch one weekend afternoon and had a GREAT sandwich. I opted for “Better than a Gyro” which boasted braised pork belly, raita, escalivada, pea shoots, and calabrian chili orange vinagrette on griddled flatbread. The only let down were the homemade potato chips served with, which were oddly tasteless. Service is hip and sweet. And the price is right. (The $10 sandwich.) More of a butchershop and cafe really–definitely not a place to linger–but still cool. Ask for a tour of the prep are and meat locker downstairs. The Verdict: Great for lunch.

Blackbird, 619 W Randolph Street. My colleague and I were invited to a special networking dinner here and I was really excited about things because I think the last time I was at Blackbird was like 2006? But oh so bitterly disappointed. (Bad of me, as a guest, to complain.) Portions were eensy-weensey (and you know I’m a fan of normal sized portions) and nothing really clicked. I still want to find out what was in the butternut squash soup because it reeked of alcohol, which wasn’t mentioned anywhere on the menu. The Verdict: If you don’t go out to eat a lot, you’ll be fine here.

Zocalo, 358 W Ontario. My friend Christina and I dropped in here one weekend and were pleasantly surprised. Firstly, I loved the decor–all Mexican art and flowers and Frida Kahlo. Secondly, our server was awesome; I was mesmerized by his deep, deep voice. Thirdly, the food was pretty darn good. I wasn’t too experimental–I just had mixed tacos–but they were pretty awesome tacos. Also enough food for three people, but the price was right. The Verdict: Fun. I’d go back here, especially for one of their private rooms.

Sultan’s Market, 2057 W North Avenue. I woke up one morning, dreaming of falafel. So I went to Sultan’s, a Middle Eastern deli in Chicago’s Bucktown. And it was fine. Huge portions. It was dark though, and not in a good way. Needs an interior decorator. And a scrub brush. Too much going on. The Verdict: Meh.

Coming up…too many places to mention, really. Plus, I go back to Brazil.

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For someone who was gone for a while, this is casual American bar food, but grown-up. Venison chili, DUCK TACOS, pulled boar sandwiches, rabbit and dumplings, and DID I MENTION THE DUCK TACOS? And the oyster menu? And how on Tuesdays, they do $2 half pints?? The beer menu is pretty awesome as well.

Now if only they had free wifi. That would be awesome. But a minor quibble, that.

Here’s another example of how awesome they are:

They’re open for lunch now, during the week (except Mondays) but word doesn’t seem to have gotten out yet because it’s Friday as I sit here and write this and it’s pretty quiet. But that’s a welcome change from the craziness of Big Star.

My lead photo? That’s my lunch today. An Ahi tuna sandwich with crispy tobasco shallots, sprouts, WASABI GINGER MAYO, and rosemary fries. (!!!) Pretty great, for a casual Friday lunch. Excellent, actually.

Life is good.

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The more things change, the more things stay the same. Sometimes the simplest explanation IS the explanation. Sometimes, you have to leave to go home. Or come home to leave. Thankfully, the winter of my homecoming last year has not been repeated. Chicago is bright and cool and BRISK. The skies are stunningly, vividly blue. I’ve worn my boots just once. And my down coat — its buttons lost somewhere between last year and this year — also just once. Everything is lovely, but it makes me feel like we are on the cusp of something. On the cusp of something big. Something huge. Something terrible.

I am frightened.

So, um, I’ll just keep going out to eat then. Here’s where I’ve been lately:

Boiler Room, 2210 N California Ave: I loved the vibe of Boiler Room. I loved the loos. (Chicago Transit doors and, even, sound effects.) I loved the beer selection and I thought our service was pretty good too. But the pizza? Undercooked, and while at least the pepperoni had some taste to it, The Purist (mozzarella, basil, balsamic reduction) was pretty tasteless. The Verdict: Meh. So much promise, but not fully realized.

Keefer’s, 20 W Kinzie: My NY Strip Steak was good. The creamed spinach was good. The potato croquettes were excellent. But our server took FOREVER to take our order, and then he claimed we didn’t order calamari to start (we did) and then at some point, a fist fight broke out between other tables. ??? Oh, and I should mention that my friend who made the reservation is a very dependable, reliable person and I was there when she called Keefer’s and booked the table. Upon arrival, they had no record of our booking. They worked things out which was good of them, but still all very odd. Oh!! And then, when the bill came, we asked for it to be divided up amongst credit cards and that was one of the most complicated conversations I’ve ever had, for what was a basic math thing. The Verdict: I’d go somewhere else before I went back here, but I did like the vibe of the room with the radios in it.

Nori, 954 W Diversey: I dropped in here for a quick dinner after getting a haircut at Salon Blue on Sheffield, a place I’ve been going to since 1998! (Go see Amy. Tell her Krista sent you. Funnily, Chicago Food Snob has been going to Amy forever too!) Amazing. Anyhow, obviously Penny’s isn’t doing as well as it used to because this used to be part of Penny’s next door. I sat at the bar and had the Red Nori (spicy tuna, spicy shrimp, and avocado covered with tempura crumbs, red tobiko, and unagi sauce) and it was pretty enjoyable. But then I had the Crunchy Spicy Tuna maki and it was so depressing, it made me cry. There was no crunch. It was like they forgot a step. Roll the maki in raw tempura crumbs and…sigh. The Verdict: OK. Not great. I will keep searching.

Roka Akor, 11 W Illinois. I dropped in here for lunch with some colleagues this past Wednesday during Restaurant Week. The restaurant was curiously empty. Apparently, no one in The Loop wants to go north of the river, because Petterino’s is freaking PACKED every single afternoon. And Petterino’s is just good. And not as vibe-y as Roka Akor. Fascinating. Well, I had the restaurant week special and although I thought the Wagyu beef and kimchi dumplings were pretty luscious, the rest of the meal — the butterfish roll and the barbecued pork loin — were uninspiring. At $22 though, this was a very good value. The Verdict: Good. And the bar area seems good for solo dining.

So there we are. Some recent tries in Chicago. Until next time! Let’s hope it doesn’t snow like crazy in between.

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I started at the new Walgreen’s on State Street. I give them six months before all they offer is Doritos and Cheetos and People magazine. But in the meantime, they have a large selection of lunch salads, and they’re super cheap too. My Southwestern Chicken salad was $5.10. (+/- a few cents. I forget exactly how much.) There were only 1.5 pieces of chicken in the salad, and the tortilla chips were a bit on the stale side, but the dressing was pretty awesome. If I were on a budget, I’d eat this salad more often.

On Tuesday, I hopped over to 7th on State at Macy’s. I am a sucker for their Shrimp Tostada salad and their pretzel bread. This is not a low-calorie salad, but it is pretty damn delicious. I normally try not to eat the bread or the fried tostada that forms the base of the salad. I focus on the greens, the shrimp, and the black beans (hidden under the lettuce). This is not a cheap salad — it generally comes in around $11 bucks — but it’s pretty darn good for the price.

My favorite salad of the week has to be the Chimi Chop Salad at Native Foods at 218 S Clark Street in the Chicago Loop. Another $11 salad. But no meat! Only veg. I don’t know if it’s the “warm shaved Native Peppered Seitan” (no idea what that is) or the dressing or what, but this is a damn good salad that I think about often in my spare time. I am not kidding.

On Thursday, I popped into Au Bon Paid for their Mediterranean Salad. This came in around $7.50 or so. Meh. Ice cold and not enough going for it. A sad, sad salad. But the balsamic dressing was nice.

Admittedly, on Friday I took a break from salad. I had a craving for some Indian food, so I went to the only place I could find in The Loop serving a curry. The place is called Curried and it kinda, well, sucks. Firstly, they screwed up my order. Secondly, if screwing up my order wasn’t bad enough, when I went up to the counter to deliver my gentle, “Hey um, so I don’t think this is mine,” the guy at the counter told me I must have made a mistake. Um, no. I didn’t make a mistake, you did. Jackass. And thirdly, while the saag paneer was nice, the chicken tikka felt like it must have come out of a box.

Despite Friday’s slip up, today, I was back on the salad. I caught up my colleague Mark — he back from London, me back from Brazil — over a Winter Cobb Salad at the Atwood Cafe in The Burnham Hotel. I used to stay at The Burnham all the time for work in the old days, back when I lived across the pond. I will always have a soft spot for the hotel and its restaurant. But with or without my faded memories, this was a very nice salad. Could have used a bit more dressing, but otherwise, quite nice. Pricey though. My portion of the bill came to $24, with tip and tax. I got a lot of ingredients though, for $24. But still…sigh.

The Verdict: If I had to rank the salads, I would say…
1. Native Foods, Chimi Chop
2. 7th on State, Shrimp Tostada
3. Atwood Cafe, Winter Cobb
4. Au Bon Pain, Mediterranean Salad
5. Walgreen’s Southwestern Salad

That’s roughly $58 on salad, plus the $11 I spent on curry for $69. Wowzers. And I wonder why I have no money.

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Back in December, I hosted a little tea and cake and Champagne party at mine, and the estimable Paige Worthy (a most excellent name if there ever was one) arrived  bearing a six pack of assorted microwbrews. Why haven’t I thought of this sooner??? Buy six SEPARATE beers. Not six of the same type. Bring as a hostess gift. Perfect.

And so tonight, for the Superbowl, I will be watching David Beckham get down to his skivvies while drinking some of the above. In case you can’t see the details, here they are:

Three Floyds, Jinx Proof Lager. Munster, Indiana. “A crisp, pale and refreshing lager with a light malt sweetness and plenty of noble hop notes.” $2.25 a bottle at Lush. 5.10% abv.

Goose Island Sofie. Chicago, Illinois. “Belgian Style Ale.” Price  unknown. 6.5% abv.

Ayinger Celebrator Doppelbock. Aying, Germany. “Finest Bavarian double bock beer.” $3.50 at Lush. 6.7% abv.

Lagunitas, Little Sumpin’. Petaluma, California. “12 fluid oz’s of hops, malt, hops, hops, yeast, hops, water and hops.” $2.25 at Lush. 7.5% abv.

 Great Lakes Burning River. Cleveland, Ohio. “A handcrafted pale ale.” $2.00 at Lush. 6.0% abv.

Cisco Brewers Whale’s Tale Pale Ale. Nantucket, Massachusetts. “Whales’ Tale is an English style pale ale, characterized by an abundance of fruity hops.” $2.25 at Lush. 5.6% abv.

And then of course, for those of you not interested in beer, here’s Mr. Beckham…

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