As an online business woman, one thing that always seems to be a must is to be productive in business. I say… HOLD ON! Time to put on the brakes! Since when did productivity only apply to business.

If you read my one of my few opening posts here on Life and Business Integration then you know that my revelation for this entire site came from the example of the Proverb Woman. This woman was the epitome of a woman living her life fully integrated.

Not that she was perfect; but she was in alignment with God’s will for her life. She took her gifts, talents, and skills and use them to run her business to the glory of God. As she obeyed God’s lead, her life was more and more productive.

She is not the wife, at home, tending to the kids and her husband day and night as so many would have you believe. Nor is she a hard core business woman who thinks that kids are better off with the nanny or granny.

The Proverb Woman in the Bible is an idealized woman. She is the woman we should all strive to be. And get this..she does not have to be married to be a virtuous woman. This woman knows who she is and stands strong in Whose she is. She knows that all she has is because God said, Yes!

With that said, her focus is on being productive in all areas of her life; and yes, for her, business is a part of it.

It is very important as we move forward in our business that we remember that productivity is not just about business. It is about your entire life.

• Eating right, exercising, and caring for your body is being productive
• Taking care of a sick child is being productive
• Spending time in the Master’s suite for renewal and communication with Him is being productive
• Taking the time to play or read to your child, or anyone’s child is being productive
• Getting some sun and enjoying God’s beauty is being productive

Productivity is important in business. It means that you are working at success. However being so productive in business that you are not productive in life means that you are missing out on what matters most.

The Proverb Woman’s productive manner can be an example for both men and women. Her productivity started with God’s guidance and ended with God’s glory!

Now go and make your day PRODUCTIVE!!

We are covering the book of the month, Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself. In part one of the discussion we did a general overview of the personalities, their strengths and weaknesses. Today let’s get a little deeper into the good and bad of each of the personalities.

None of the four personalities can be specifically described as positive or negative, because they each have upsides and downsides. The book makes it clear that the characteristics are for observing and identifying, rather than judging.

In taking a closer look at the four personalities we can get a view of the good and the bad.

• A Choleric is focused on getting things done, but can run rough-shod over others. They are decisive and stubborn.

• A Melancholy is a highly talented person, they have brilliant ideas, although sometimes they can paralyze themselves with over-analysis. Lists and “doing things the right way” are characteristics of this personality type.

• A Sanguine gets on well with people and can get others excited about issues, but cannot always be relied upon to get things done. They love interacting with others and play the role of the entertainer in group interactions. They have a tendency to over-promise and under-deliver.

• A Phlegmatic is neutral – they tend not to actively upset people, but their indifference may frustrate people. They try not to make decisions, and generally go for the status quo. They care about people and harmony.

As you read through each of the personalities did you see yourself. What good parts did you see? What about the bad?

In business we have to be very careful how we behave and I guess you could say the same about life as well. This is why tapping into your personality is so very important. When you don’t get YOU, no one else will. You may risk being taken the wrong way, causing harm to your reputation or worse.

Knowing how you tick is important. Wouldn’t you agree?

Here are today’s questions:

1. Can you see your personality in your business?  Why or why not?
2. How do you think God wants us to use our personality in the business setting?

Today I want to encourage those of you reading this who have not picked up Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself to get a copy today. It is a great reference tool and a good way your personality as is pertains to business and your life overall.

Looking forward to reading your comments.

This month’s Integration Book Club Pick is one that will help you discover your personality, how it relates to others and how it can help you in your quest for integration.

While Personality Plus: How to Understand Others by Understanding Yourself is not a business book, it can help you find a way to connect with your market in a more unique way. Knowing your personality is also to valuable in life. Your personality is who you are. If you get that then you can design a lifestyle that fits who you are.

Over the next couple of weeks, we will talk more in depth about Personality Plus, our personalities and integrated balance.

If you are on the Integration Weekly subscriber list then you received this month’s discussion material. If not then I suggest you sign up for the ezine because that is how you get a hold the discussion material for the book of the month.

Today I think the best way to start is to actually talk about the assessment you took.

What did you think of what personality assessment revealed about you? Was it you? Were you surprised? How did it help you?

For those who did not get the discussion guide or the profile descriptions, here are the type of personality discussed in Florence’s book:

The ‘Personality Plus’ personality profiles

• Choleric: This is the commander-type. Cholerics are dominant, strong, decisive, stubborn and even arrogant.

• Melancholy: This is the mental-type. Their typical behavior involves thinking, assessing, making lists, evaluating the positives and negatives, and general analysis of facts.

• Sanguine: This is the social-type. They enjoy fun, socializing, chatting, telling stories – and are fond of promising the world, because that’s the friendly thing to do.

• Phlegmatic: This is the flat-type. They are easy going, laid back, nonchalant, unexcitable and relaxed. Desiring a peaceful environment above all else

Each personality has its strengths and weaknesses and Personality Plus covers each of these points very well. I know some people who relish in their weaknesses, seeing it as more of a way to be a bully, or lazy, or depressed based on their personality type. However, this should not be.

For the Faith-filled business owner, the goal should be to work out those weaknesses and to draw on the strengths of your personality. There is never an excuse for mediocrity in the life of a Child of God. To enjoy using the weak parts of your personality to manipulate, or find reason not to do something, is simply unacceptable.

Let’s explore this a little further.

Do you think that the weak parts of you should shine through in your business? Why or why not?

What are the dangers of using those weaknesses in the wrong way in business?

How do you use your strengths?

I cannot wait to see what you have to say about today’s book club discussion!

We have been discussing the Power of Influence here at Life and Business Integration and if you have not read the other post, you can read Part 1 and Part 2 to see what this series has been about. This post is the final installment of the series and I hope that for you it was as good to read as it was for me to write.

Today I want to cover a couple of more points about influencing like Christ.

Being authoritative as opposed to authoritarian does not mean you lose the power of influence that you may already have. It also doesn’t mean you should lack confidence when you speak. It simply means that you are tactful and genuine with your approach – not a stuck-up tyrant. The difference is that you speak with confidence rather than arrogance.

This is what Christ did when he spoke with others. He approached the Sadducees and Pharisees with confidence; He spoke to Satan in the desert with confidence; He shared the Gospel with confidence. Yet, with all the Power He had, He never had an authoritarian approach.

There was always a peace about whatever He spoke of. His personality, passion, and purpose all shined through but He never once pushed it or forced it on anyone. He was tactful, diplomatic, and most of all non-judgmental.

If you want to be an influence in your business, you’ll want to lead by example and speak with an encouraging, yet confident tone. In doing so, becoming a powerful influence can prove to be a beneficial and successful experience.

What do you think about influencing like Christ? Is there some relevance to it for you? Why or why not?

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Communication is a Key Factor in Influencing

In part one of the series on influencing like Christ we talked about leading by example. Were you encouraged to be more like Christ when it comes to influencing other in your business?

Now comes on of my favorite strategies: Communication. What you say and how you say it is of utmost importance when influencing others.

If you’re condescending or condemning in your speech, others will see you as haughty, arrogant and egotistical. Most likely, they’ll steer away from you. However, when you’re uplifting, encouraging and genuine, others tend to listen and heed what you say.

Christ was a natural encourager and His agenda was well known. He was tactful and honest in His approach. While He said what needed to be said, He was sure to use the right words at the appropriate time to get the point across.

One way to speak in an encouraging tone is to use your voice as if you’re at dinner with your parents. You most likely wouldn’t be harsh or rude when speaking to them; nor would you speak down to them with a condescending tone. You’d use a calm tone of voice and speak pleasantly.

Think of it as using your “salt and pepper” voice. When you ask someone to pass the salt and pepper, are you rude, demanding or harsh? Not likely. You’re probably soft spoken, with a lilt in your voice, which influences the person to immediately pass the salt and pepper to you.

Jesus said that we are the salt of the world. That means that our speech must be such that is respectable, loving, and with a great deal of tact. Salt makes things taste better but a lock or over abundance of it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

Keep it balanced and tactful when you communicate with others in business. Just because you may be the boss or have your own business does not give you the right to speak in any manner you feel necessary. Be prayerful in your approach and speak as led.

A good example of Christ’s tactful communication skills can be found in John 4. He spoke to the woman at the well with that witnessed to the core of who she was without judging or putting her down. She left feeling overjoyed with the encounter and brought more people to Jesus to hear the Good News He had to share.

Can you imagine the growth of your business if you spoke in the same manner to those you are trying to influence?

The final part of this series will be about being authoritative and not tyrant in your efforts to influence others. I look forward to hearing from you about this subject?

How do you feel about the power of influence as Christ demonstrated?

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If you have not figured it out by now I am an avid Mary J. Blige fan. For many reason I admire Mary’s transparent transformation. I admire her unashamedly admittance to the fact that she lived a life that did not reflect the real Mary. Most of all, I love that she give God the glory for her transformation!

Mary’s song, “Just Fine”, deals with the reality of being ok with where you are in life. I want to share line from the song and talk a little about living your dreams!

“Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new”

In case you don’t get it, what Mary is saying in this line is that it brings joy to your heart when live out your dreams, desires, and passions. Now let me pause here because I don’t want anyone to think that I am speaking of the Law of Attraction. That is a concept that I just cannot ascribe to because I believe that living in God’s will is the best way to live. What I am saying, and I think is Mary too, is that God gives you the dreams, the desires, and the passion. He does this because He loves you and he knows that you can achieve the best in life.

I was once asked what motivates me to dream and be where I am today. My response was that my faith in Jesus and my salvation help me to see that my dreams, desires, and passions are God’s because I delight myself in him. Are you hearing this?

When you delight yourself in the Lord not only do you get the desires of you heart, but you desire to live out God’s desire, passion and dreams for your life; which in essence become on in the same as you learn to walk in obedient love.

When we walk in His will, we desire to do those things He has set out for us. This involves a level of obedience and responsibility so that we are aware of what He has for us to do.

WOW!

So guess what? It’s ok to dream, desire, and have a passion for more. God intended it that way.

I lived 15 or so years of my life in a state of denial. I denied that God wanted me to live my dreams. I quenched my passion in so many ways. I put my desires under wraps so that I could be a good momma, a good wife, a good daughter, a good sister, aunt, and friend. I was not living the complete life  that I was meant to live. This past year I journeyed back through my life and realized that God gave me those dreams, desires, and passions for a reason. They were in line with my gifts, talents, and skills. He planted them inside of me to bloom. I can’t be a good anything if I am not living out the dreams, desires, and passions God has for me.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that is goes against God’s Word for you to dream and live out your passion. It is not a new age belief. It is a God given inspiration. He even says in Jeremiah 29:11 that he knows the plans he has for you and they are plans that will prosper you and give you a future and a hope. These plans all lead right back to him so that he is glorified.

You may find that your business is lacking because you are not happy where you are. That is ok! I tried several roads in business before I found my focus and mission of being an agent of transformation in life and business.

If you are stuck, take a step back. Sit in God’s lap for a while and listen to Him. He wants you to succeed. Know that whatever He gives you will be for your best. He is the CEO of your life and what you do in business does matter to Him. So hear what He has to say and don’t be afraid to adjust or even change your course.

Remember that your business should always be a reflection of who you are. Your life determines your business; not the other way around.

You can dream big when it comes to business. God is ok with you reaching for the stars!

Be just fine and live your dreams!

When it comes to having a successful business, knowing how to influence others is great asset to attain. However, as a faith-filled Believer it is important that we understand that influence is not manipulation or deceit. Influence for the Believer should be persuasion with love and service at the forefront of our objective. As Christ was the Great Influence so we should strive to be the same.

In order to get a clear understanding about influence, it may be necessary to know what the term truly means.

Influence is the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone or something.

Influence is one of the most motivating factors in decision making. When you have a major decision to make, what are the influences that drive you to a final decision?

It’s normal to base any big decisions you make on how it will affect your loved ones. In essence, you could say that those closest to you have a lot of influence on the decisions you make in life.

So, how do you become influential so you can produce your desired effects on the actions, behaviors and opinions of others?

Over the next few days we will cover this topic.  By learning and applying a few simple strategies, we can learn how to become more like Christ and influence in love and service.

Let’s look at the first strategy now.

Lead by Example

The best way to influence someone is in your own behavior. This can go both ways – good or bad. If you want to influence someone to be positive and do well, you’ll need to be a living example of the behavior you expect.

In your business, be someone that others would want to model. That means you should strive to be timely in what you do, work diligently, and avoid getting into the issues that cause gossiping and back biting.

Jesus understood the power of being an example. This is why He choose to live as His Father expected Him to. Remember that He was God’s Son but He was also a man with the freedom to choose. His choice was to be the example of God’s expectation of His children, be obedient and follow through with God’s plan.

People are lead by example and will likely do whatever others around them are doing. If you’re a leader, then you’re the example they’ll follow. Remember, you can exert influence over others by becoming a proactive example to model.

Be the example of influencing with love and service.

In part two of the series we will discuss communication.

I would love to hear your thoughts as we move through this series on influence. You can help by taking the poll in the sidebar, commenting, sharing your tips on influence in business, or tweeting about the series.

Looking forward to sharing more with you about influencing in business like Christ.

What is the purpose of a road map? Why are they so important? Have you ever considered a personal road map for your life?

A road map is a necessary tool when you are traveling from one destination to another. If you are not sure where to go then the map can show you how to get there. Not only can it show you how to get there but it can show you the most efficient way to get to your destination. It is important to find the most efficient way to travel because it can save you from using too much time traveling down a road that may have obstacles, steep hills, too many stop signs and other traveling woes.

Don’t you want a smooth ride when you travel?

A great benefit of a roadmap is that it can help you discover new places and things you have never seen before. Imagine looking at a scene, an animal, or a tree that you never knew existed. What thoughts would run through your mind if you saw a baby fawn being tended to by its mother? Or how would you react to a falling star?

Another awesome benefit is that a road map keeps you focused on your target. With a map in hand you are able to mark your target destination and take the roads needed to get there. A focused target tells you which way you need to be going and the road map provides the best way to reach where you need to be.

In life the use of a road map is just as beneficial as one for traveling from one physical point to another. Our entire life from birth to death involves moving from one destination to another. It is called growth! With growth comes the need for guidance and direction. That is what a life road map will do for you. It will give you what you need to get to from one leg of your journey to the next.

There should be a road map for everything you do in life.

Road maps, in essence, help to keep us sane. They are the connection that lead us to the final destination of our journey  – whatever that journey may be.

Have you developed a road map for your life? Why do you think Road Maps are important?

In 2002 a change began with me. First I got married and then three months later I was pregnant with my second child. What most would have thought of as a wonderful experience was not my experience.

I was excited to be married and having a baby, but my husband and I were having issue almost from the start; and adding a baby was not ideal at the time. Sure you may say that we should have protected ourselves and that we did. However, God saw differently.

With all that was going on in my life, I started on a downward path to a very deep depression. It was like I stepped out of the woman I was and became someone else. This someone else I was too crazy about.

My depression only worsened with the birth of my child. I loved him but our bond was not instant. I often times found myself wondering when would I feel the bound. Even as I gave him mother nature’s milk our bound was not as strong as I wanted.

My depression also led to more profound issues in my marriage and we grew apart.

I decided to bury myself online with various activities. Little did I know that the journey would save my life.

In 2006 after being online as writer and blogger since 2002, I met a wonderful woman who took me under her arms and trained me for online business. That was the start of my transformation.

Little by little, the confidence that I had lost started to come back. Not just because of business but because of the appreciation and confirmation of who I was that people shared.

The more I got involved with the lives of others, the better I felt about me.

In 2008 I suffered a set back and had a nervous breakdown that almost took my life.

I thought it was my end but God showed me differently. It was my beginning.

I started going back over my life and all that I has been blessed with. I started utilizing the talents and skills that I had to help others even more. My faith was the vehicle that kept me going. I stay alive by being a servant to others.

I started sharing my journey with other women, and even some men, only to realize that I was helping them to transform their own live. My testimony became the anchor some people needed to start a change in their own lives.

It was then that I realized my true mission. The more I shared my story with others the more transformation occurred: Not only for them but for me too.

My business then started to reflect my life and my life took on a new light. It was then that I saw the power of transformation and my calling came to life. I saw that my calling was to be an agent of Transformation.

I tell this story to encourage some woman, or man, who is looking for change. It is possible. Your life can be transformed if you just believe and do the work necessary for the change.

God is right there holding your hand to help you through the process.

Oh, and on a side note, if you are wondering is my youngest and I ever formed that bond I was seeking…WE DID! He is my little sunshine, my prayer partner, my encourager, and my biggest supporter. I love who he is and how sweet is demeanor is. His innocence and approach to life, helped to save my life.

As for my marriage it is a continual work in progress but we fight hard to make it work because we know we can.

I am a living witness that transformation can happen. You have to want to do the work and realize that the process won’t be easy. You also have to be willing to see YOU for who you are: The Good, the bead and the ugly and know that the junk will go away. One step, one day, one minute at a time….YOU CAN  DO IT!

I would love to help you reach your goals for life transformation. Perhaps you are on a road that seems destined for nowhere; or maybe you see the good, the bad, and the ugly but you can’t see how to sort through it all; maybe you are a woman who thinks that God does not love you so loving yourself it impossible.You may even have your life pretty much on track but you see a need for better direction and focus in your business.

Can I tell you that I have been there, done that, and sister, I am still writing the book. However I have learned about the tools needed to continue on my transformation journey. I get that I am more than a conqueror and that, YES, God does love me as I am and He knows it is not how I will stay.

I offer coaching/mentoring that is geared towards helping you change your life pattern by changing your thought pattern. Once your thought pattern changes, you will see your business change as well.

To discover what my mentoring is about read about my coaching approach and if you are interested schedule your 30 minute complimentary session today by filling out the Questionnaire or by contacting me.

I would love to work with you!

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Here at the Life and Business Center I will never make it appear as if I have it all together because I don’t. I am walking this journey of balanced change, just like you are. It is just that I may be a little further in the game than some and that is why God chose me for the job. There are things I have experienced that can enlighten your path.

One of the most profound things that I have experienced has been the actual transformation of my entire being. Something happened when I decided to wave my white flag and just surrender to God. Something happened that lonely day some years ago when I asked God to take hold of me and mold me into what He wanted. I was tired of living for everyone else and not for Him. I thought is was God’s desire that I give so much of myself to everyone. But it was not.

I was fat, mentally unstable, emotionally spent, and spiritually burdened. This all came from being in a messy controlled situation that I thought God wanted me in. I followed what others wanted me to do and it scared me. I have always been one to do my own thing but what I did not realize was that I really doing everyone else’s thing but making it fit into what I thought was my thing.

I missed out on so much in life as a result.

• I did not complete my degree
• I did not write that poetry book
• I did not take those certification courses
• I did not start my counseling service
• I did not complete that novel

I let go of all that was inside of me for the sake of keeping things the way I thought they were supposed to be. I was so wrong.

When I hit my bottom in 2008, I knew there was no other way but up. It was then that I started letting the controllers know that they were no longer allowed to invade my healthy space. When I said this, it was a huge weight lifted of of me.  I was finally getting my sense of ‘me’ back.

I had to do some things in order to stay strong as I faced people, let some go, and moved forward with what God had for me to do. I had to stay prayerful, encourage myself with the Word, allow others to encourage me, accept who I was and allow God to love me like He wanted to. There were other things I had to do as well but they are too many type in this post.

The other day I was contemplating all that I had been through and how far I have come. I simply took the step and started somewhere and it made all the difference in the world. Once I said “enough”, God said “Ok. It is time for your change.”

What He did to my life was amazing. It is hard to explain it but I have truly been transformed. I let God work on my life and and love me like I deserved to be loved. He told me that the people in my life were either going to get on board with His plans for my life or move on. He carried me, gave me strength to stand up to my demons, and showed me who and what was toxic in my life.

Not that my transformation is complete but I am not who I used to be. Transformation comes in layers and I am loving the point I am at now. For me it can only get better.

The process may not always feel good but it will always be for the best. It may not yield what I expect but it will create a bountiful harvest.

I watched the Whitney Houston interview with Oprah and was amazed at how her life is being transformed. We saw Whitney at her best, worst, and now she is getting better. The choices she made were no different than any of those we may have made. They just came in different packages. All through her interview, Whitney said it was her faith that kept her going. I think in may ways it was the same for me.

No matter how angry I became with God; or how often I blamed Him for my situation; or how much I wished He would have just to me what was coming, I still had a glimmer of hope that the little bit of faith I still had would bring back to where I needed to be.

As I end this post I want to add a couple of the verse from Whitney’s “I Didn’t Know My Own Strength”. It is proof positive that we all have to start somewhere to experience the power of transformation.

I Didn’t Know My Own Strength
Whitney Houston

Lost touch with my soul
I had no where to turn
I had no where to go
Lost sight of my dream,
Thought it would be the end of me
I thought I’d never make it through
I had no hope to hold on to,
I thought I would break

I didn’t know my own strength
And I crashed down, and I tumbled
But I did not crumble
I got through all the pain
I didn’t know my own strength
Survived my darkest hour
My faith kept me alive
I picked myself back up
Hold my head up high
I was not built to break
I didn’t know my own strength

Found hope in my heart,
I found the light to life
My way out of the dark
Found all that I need
Here inside of me
I thought I’d never find my way
I thought I’d never lift that weight
I thought I would break

WOW! I was there and I can tell you that Transformation is powerful! It is great for your life and makes your business more effective too.

How are you being transformed?

Are you enjoying the process?

How do you hope that a life transformation will help your business?

If at anytime you want to answer these questions privately, please don’t hesitate to email me at latara [at] latarahamying.com. I would love to know your thoughts on this subject.