iPosts

my lonely outpost

2011-12-08T00:11:00.001+05:30

and its time for another post in my lonely outpost...

it goes like this, I often wonder whether I am a good person or a bad person. Though I keep the thoughts to myself all the time, it comes up again and again. And i hate everything other people like so much. Cynicism has been woven in. I like to design something new, who doesn't? I am starting to lose the velvet touch. I am losing myself. Till recently, I thought I was a good enough person with the occasional irrationalities. But now, I am starting to doubt myself.

Is all this just a fabric beneath which, at heart, I , me , myself was just another selfish, pitiless, cheat. Cheat! that word is something very bad. I don't want to be one, but sometimes I run out of justifications for my actions.

Right now, Mr ak asked for the key. I doubt what they think about me. I always try that, try to see from the other viewpoint. Though I remind myself everyday, that I don't give a penny's worth about what they think about me, I worry everyday about the exactly the same thing. Combine that with the anxiety surrounding my current existence of smoke and clouds, I see myself slipping into this long woven thought trains. More than a penny for those thoughts.

I feel better now though. I want all these thoughts to be poured out, though I doubt anyone hearing my thoughts will get it or even less, I am not sure what I want to really say. Sigh, sometimes I feel like I never came out of the effect of the weed I smoked long back which took me for a ride like never before. Life, it seems, is without its fair share of surprises.

I am living a lie every other day. That is one thing which is being a constant threat to my happiness. What happens when they all find out about everything. Will they still feel the same about me. Here I go again. I don't want to care about what they care about me.

In my own words, time constraints has made any option seem feasible. I don't know which way I will turn though.

Innocent Rambling again!

2011-07-10T00:48:00.001+05:30

i am back after sometime to blogger and I see that it hasn't changed much since the time i started using it. However, they have a login box in the front page itself. The old blogger where you had to click a link and then go to another login page was really annoying.

Well, what made me come back for another post?? Some booze and some restlessness. Life in chennai is coming very monotonous. Did you hear that I am working with mainframes now?? JCLs, rexx and abends have become the new common usages. Abend 3303 is a database busy abend, just down and up your DB and the job will run fine. Don't worry, this post is not going to boggle your mind with that cr*p.

This one is about weekends. I got the idea of posting this on the cab back home from office (it's free of charge!). The guy next to me was trying to make some conversation with the pretty girl in saree sitting next to him. And it was a Friday! what else to ask other than, "hey, what are your plans for the weekend?". I get a load of these questions now every Friday. I mean, what am i doing for weekends. Just the usual booze and lazing around. Back in college, nobody used to mind about it being a monday or a friday. All of a sudden, people expect you to say something cool you are going to do for the weekend.

What weekends?? Its just two days to do your chores which you have been putting off for the last two weeks and would probably put off again if you can. I mean that shirt could use another two weeks in the office before it goes into the laundry right?? As its the case, we got drunk this saturday and started conversing about anything and everything. And the topic of lies, obligations and life comes to my mind. The lies i have been living through nags at my consciousness every now and then. The lies i have told about what i am are really annoying. These MNCs and the boring 9 to 5 jobs are stupid dude!, except for the salary you get every end of the month!

Well back about being at the weekends! Weekends have become the all important part of life in Office. The fact that you have got nothing to do for weekends is so out of fashion. Come on! What is so bad about not going out for another useless stroll in the city and the stupid malls.

Its her birthday this 21st. Lots of memories come flooding back. Do you know what really missing someone or something means? Its that, every irrelevant thing brings back those memories and you think about how better off you were then. You think of the better things and the better life. The obligatory struggle that you live now is so much torture. Like the slow but sure advance of death in your life.

On the technical side, I have some projects that are coming up. I dont know why but i think a lot now-a-days. Thinking too much can make you go crazy, they have told me, really?? Back in those days, you didn't have to care about how other people would react to your off hand remarks, Its so damn irritating and the fact that i have become a non stop smoker doesn't really help. Ok, to my recent projects, some stupid java work i did at my office have got them to appreciate me. It feels good though, being appreciated and valued once in a while.

However, i dont think i have a future in any of these things. I am just biding my time doing some coding until my big thing comes up.
And i miss cynthia and gmj, the two little better things of my life. I wish i have another chance at them. Oh! those good times of no worries and so much happiness. The past looks so rosy and the future so bleak. Mainly money worries though. I wish i had enough just to pay off my debts. Debts to bankers and debts to friends and debts to strangers. All are debts and all are same.

That was nice chatting with you riddle, see ya!!!

Traffic

2011-01-28T00:19:00.005+05:30

I got back home for this weekend, actually for 6 days starting on 26th, Republic day. Which seemed a far better idea than waiting in Chennai hoping that the RMG guy will call us for a project some time soon. Work has become so idiotic at TCS. Your training got over more than a month ago, the recession seems to be over all over the world and still we are looking for projects to work in. The biggest irony is that they are recruiting another 50000 freshers by the end of this academic year. I wonder how they manage together all this as a cost effective organization. Must be the 40-60 ratio one hears now and then. The client pays 100 bucks for the work and the guy who actually did all the work in the company's name gets only 40 or lesser than that. Very argumentative..

Well, this post is not about TCS or the work anyway. Home for the weekend, a movie out seemed to be in order and hearing the good opinion about it, we all went for 'Traffic'. The movie was a far better attempt at film making than the usual low grade stuff you see in malayalam films these days. The treatment of the subject is very well done. You can feel throughout the movie that you ought to expect the unexpected. The cliched scenes have all been reworked into more pleasant and intriguing takes.

The basic plot of the movie is the seemingly impossible attempt at transferring a heart from a donor to a patient who is 150 km away in under 2 hours by road. However incidents surrounding all this and how the director chose to use them is all what makes this movie a money-well-spent-on. Its how the various people who are going to be a part of this journey in someway or another reached that particular part of their lives. The scenes have been creatively shot though a little over dramatization could be seen at places. Good actors like Roma have been under utilized too. Srinivasan, as usual, gets into his role with his usual nonchalantness and does a wonderful job playing the good cop gone bad under circumstances and who wants to make up in his life for that.

The climax is truly the best part of the movie. All the often used operation theatre drama where you are put into suspense about whether the heart will work or not has been all cut out. The films glides into the climax where each of those characters feeling satisfied that they have done something good with their lives or as in the case of some others relieved at having got over a bad day.

It has been a very good attempt of a film and the director Rajesh is someone to watch out for.

Back in kollam, you are getting unusual nostalgic feelings for this old home. Went to all the usual hangouts in this city again and the memories start to flood back in. Its going to be a loooong journey back to that second home called Chennai.

On other news the cigaratte addiction is on full flow now and if I dont get a laptop to work back there in chennai soon I am going to be a chain smoker soon. I want something to concentrate my mind on so as not to think about anything else. Ideas are starting to cloud up... will post back sooon...

[Edit on 8th July]: i am a chain smoker even though i have a laptop now!

The Dreams

2010-12-31T02:47:00.000+05:30

They are starting to haunt me. Today morning when I woke up it was as though I had lived through all the agony of losing her. The head was completely messed up and the visions of the dream started playing around in my dream. I dreamed about her marriage and the day I am going to lose her. The bad thing is that you can run away from there in life but the dreams leave me helpless to feel that pain. It was some kind of big hall or some church, it would have been a church obviously being that she is a christian. However the scene soon changed to me watching from the back and someone shooting at me and I am trying to get out of range but I cannot. I remember so many weird things about the dream but the only thing that I was sure about at the end was that I still love her from that some part of the heart. Bloody hell achu, you have got some serious issues.

And now 'Yellow' is bringing me back all those memories and those feelings I have tried to hide under many a puff of smoke and depth. She is watching me she is wacthing me not. Kuntham.. i am out of control. Sorry gtg riddle bye

Being on the staircase

2010-12-16T17:59:00.000+05:30

Life is going great now a days. Which other job pays you about 800 bucks a day for sitting at home doing nothing?? That is happening right now with a whole lot of TCS trainees. Training at TCS has officially finished. Its officially called ILP or Initial Learning Program by tcs. Now after we reported at tcs office, the RMG or the resource managment guys there who are supposed to put us into projects, quite in a jolly mood told us "guys, we dont have any projects for you, but you have to report here everyday" and do what?? Dont ask that question.

You are supposed to report to the staircase everyday and idle about until 4. However the testing RMG man (truly godsend) went one further. He told that there was no need to report to the staircase but be at home comfortably, just be within the reach of your cell phone wherever you are. Being in that great testing stream, I too got to sit it out at home taking my cell along with me literally everywhere. I watched like about 7 films in two days and "Mystic River" really stands out. If you havent watched it yet, its a good one to spend your time on.

On other news, I have finally quit smoking. It happened last weekend. I was being totally fucked up in the mind with the booze of the weekend and the packet of miles that got consumed somewhere between saturday and sunday. One of best friends, Rijin, was over here for the weekend and it was totally out of control in the weeked. Two full bottles of vodka on the saturday night got all of us really going. I have never been that out of control on booze. To say the least, if someone asked me for the Google password I would have gladly given it to them that day.

Well, after all the hangover on sunday night things started to clear up and yeah that slogan came into my mind, "Think Simple, Think Clear". That ended the cigaratte craving. I have vowed to not touch that thing again. This time I think maybe its final, but what the heck you never really know!

Have I told you that I took a swing at pot over the last month. The first time was at the office and it was pretty wild but it was nothing compared to the second time in my room and that one was totally weird. The problem was I smoked a whole joint to myself and things got pretty out of control after that. I had smoked it on top of the water tank. If I has stayed there for another 2 minutes I would have slept there until the next day morning. The mind started rolling around and it was and unending rolling. Reality really gets fucked in there. I am still not sure whether I am living in the dream or the reality. You lose control of your conscious totally. Well that episode did put an end to my adventures in that side unless I get someone else to try it along with. It is really frightening stuff to say the least.

It is the third day today sitting it out at home and I am starting to experiment with CakePHP today. I don't really know whether i will go on with that but its nice to try. Augustin, my idiotic roommate, is going home back to Kerala for the weekend. I dont really know why i said that but he is fuzzing around here asking all sorts of stupid questions. That guy has some really serious problems coming up in his life.

Going back to that booze party day, I started msging like hell about gmj once i got high. I dont know where this is going but she is one of the reasons I am still having my sanity. On occassions its really hard to say which one is reality and which is not. So happy to be still here, I may be back soon. later

The Mall Life

2010-10-09T04:43:00.001+05:30

Whats so attractive about shopping malls that gather in the large crowds?? Things cost quite a fortune in there, nothing much to do unless you have a fat wallet and still they keep coming in. We have been wandering in and out of the malls in Chennai. The mall culture doesn't seem to inspire much good feeling in me anyway.

I would rather be happy sitting in the roof (did I mention we have a roof to ourselves with our flat?) with a glass of whatever that happens to be in the fridge and a packet of kings. That seems to be the routine nowadays. Degradation, some of my flatmates call it. My perverted mind calls it getting the s*** out of your system. The body is yet unwilling to corporate but I am enjoying what I am doing and thats it. 7 hours a day for 5 days a week, the work is getting routine.

If I read this sometime in my future, let it be an established fact that I have no regrets about any of it. The only blemish in the clear October night sky is that I dont happen to have my dear gmj with me. Have another get together in another mall tomorrow or rather today, its 4 am now. and I trip through the wires.... u2 is blaringh

Life @ Chennai

2010-09-30T04:34:00.005+05:30

The time right now is about 4 am in the morning, I am in my flat with my 5 other flat mates or roommates who are all asleep and I have a problem. I am confused. I am confused about everything. Is it called a flat because its so small and tiny with no space at all to turn around in??

To those of you who have not yet met with me, I am achu blogging now from Chennai. I am here because i joined up in TCS, that is Tata Consultancy Services, as I had nothing much else to do with my life. I could have tried to move on in Kollam with my own little franchise or company or whatever else but like many other things, my head strongly felt against it whereas the heart was stranded in the middle. There was no money, i was afraid of failure and naturally had an ill feeling about it. So the protagonist was put to sleep inside and I boarded the train.

Now that I am here, the pasture seems to be greener back there man. I mean i am one of the 277 who wound up in TCS-Chennai and already it feels like a decade though in reality it has hardly been 10 days. The shift is from 7 to 2 where they train (or make us learn as they put it) us on sitting in front of a Desktop. The whole of South India is represented in big enough numbers in my batch.

The problem is not chennai, nor TCS nor the flat for that matter. Its the competition everyone including me seems to be participating in and I don't like it a bit. Each of us seems to be competing against each other for that step up in the corporate world ladder. The secrecy in thoughts, the reluctance to trust each other, the enthusiasm to show off the knowledge, everything points in that direction.

I am not saying i am above all such nonsense. It's just that I was not this person in my college and suddenly I seem to be adapting to this environment. I don't want to, i liked the earlier me but the head seems to win again. Be the change or be changed they tell me.

To overcome the loneliness and the confusion of thoughts smoking has come up as an alternative. However in the course of time it just adds to my list of worries. I need it to give me that moment of truth which assures me that I am on the right path, but my body doesnt take well to smoking. I enjoy the lonely excursions on the rooftop with my cigarettes but afterwards its all quilt and forebodings that dominate me.

To think about all that and not be able to speak to anyone is so irritating. The friends over phone didn't work very well. Maybe it is because of the New Me, but my friends all attain a new face in front of me. Even my gmj doesn't seem to be the same anymore. Hence I have turned to my Tom Riddle Diary here and pour out my thoughts in search of an answer. If any wanderer comes up on this let it be known that you are free to idiotize, laugh at, feel pity or do what so ever you would like to do, upon these line of thoughts. At least it will be a break from the careful cocoon everyone seems to have built up for eveyone where criticism is guarded, friendship bounded by cubicles and where the exteriors are just facades to a deeper abyss.

Signing off

Is That Love?

2009-07-18T21:46:00.001+05:30

When do you know you are in Love? Does the lightning really hit you everytime that you feel true love? I don’t really have an answer. That’s why I am asking you folks. Now that college life is showing me some of the finer details of life, I’m really, as in really real, confused. I have heard all about the hormonal thing and the attraction and all, but how do you really know whether its love or not? What if its just another passing fancy like the one you get when you go window shopping?

Ok, lets shoot at the heart. Surveys say 60% of relations that you find before getting out of college don’t withstand the test of life. Its like a dialogue from ‘Dan in Real Life’, when Marie says: “To be that certain, to feel that much love. You are so lucky”. The bottom point is even in this world where you ‘Stay Connected’, it has become that much more difficult for you to find the real ‘One’. And the real tragedy is when you get so sure about someone, they just can’t be yours either. Life and love really plays some cruel tricks at times.

Now I will give you another situation. A guy tells out his love to a girl. She says she doesn't have any interests in such things. Next thing you see, she is gladly in love with the guy's ~~best friend~~, ok- one of his best friends, and the guy accepts the situation. Do you think he should have said something in that matter? But if it is love they have found out, as they know it, wouldn’t it be better to take some pointed dialogues from colleagues and let them get on with their life?

Bleeding hearts, broken noses, and still more broken relations. I think it would be better if you don’t go around looking for love. Let love find you and yeah, before its too late anyway. Hoping for the best….

Signing out!

Painting red in the elections….

2009-04-15T12:37:00.002+05:30

When I was really young, like in 5th or 6th grade, I used to wonder what all this fuss about the elections was. Now I am going to cast my first vote, and still haven’t figured it out completely, though in a different way.

Why do we have to vote for someone who we see only every 4 years? Just ask yourself, when was the last time you saw the MP from your place? The answer would probably be last elections. And they are way too old around here, that even the poster makers can’t make them look good. These are the thoughts of many a middle class youths.

Ok ok…I know, all are old arguments. Then again there is always that zeal within the youth to work for change and we want to see the elections as something we can use to create a change. But what are the options we have?

Here, in Kerala, there has always been a cyclic nature to the parties being elected. If it’s the communists one time, next time they make way for the congress people. Does that point to the inefficiency of the people who govern us or is it something to do with the people? There is never a talk about the BJP getting elected from here. We are secular enough to not allow those vermins to come up here, whatever be the case at the centre is.

Then, between the communists and congress, this time I think communists are in for a good shock. You can just feel it in the pulse of the common people here. Everyone has something bad to say about the government of present. Not the one at the centre, but here in Kerala.

There are three things that mainly comes up- the internal fighting in the party, the accused alliance with the communalist PDP and the general rise in price of commodities. The last argument maybe a little harsh, but no one can say that the other two haven’t been brought on them by themselves.

There have always been many fake communists within the party, those who preach communism in daylight and behave like bourgeois in darkness. The left will be well rid of such poisonous breeds, but alas, all the bickering between the so called ‘official faction’ and VS group (supposed), have not rubbed off well on people here. They are tired of them trying to eat each other up rather than do something good for the state.

As for PDP, the communists should never have gone on to make an allegiance with such a communalist group. The leaders should’ve known better seeing that they had such good results last time around without any public allegiances with any of such communalist groups.

One can say for sure, even in the middle and upper class, there are people in Kerala who still truly believe in communist ideals. Whoever says communism is a fading phenomenon in the world should realize that though confined in majority only to 3-4 states in India, communism has never lost its roots there, and never will. If communism can survive over 5 decades of suppression and pessimism, and still have a very strong base, it certainly is not a fading phenomenon.

I believe in communism, but I hate many of the so called communist parties. I hate their political gimmicks, I hate many of the leaders, I hate their governance sometimes, but I have faith in the ideals of communism. That, I say, will never change. I am going to vote for the first time in my life, and it feels good to know that I have some responsibility vested on me.

I don’t care much for the system anyway. I know I can’t do something big enough to change the world, but I can still be the light in a small dark room. Do those small things in life with which you can make those small changes. Help others and hope for a better tomorrow.

The Motivation or the lack of it

2009-03-14T10:12:00.003+05:30

At last, I have run myself to a halt. After all the sound and fury of three years in a college, I’ve no more will to move on. The other day I was reading this post at the lineofsight and I suddenly felt it all coming back again. The monotony of following life like everyone else, the endless exams, the chitchats and doing all those things that has absolute meaning at all. I am seriously considering dropping out, but 3 years of my life, just wasted. Maybe this is a phase every college student passes through, maybe it’s just me.

The college is good, but not good enough. The friends are amazing, but they are not quite there. The life is fantastic, but even that word has lost its meaning. Day after tomorrow is another exam day, the music is blaring in my ear and I have no intention of taking up those books again. What do we all work towards anyway? If you look at life from my point of view right now, the answer is obvious- nothing, nothing at all. Ok, maybe I am being very pessimistic here, but I am feeling that oneness about whomever it was that said- 'I was born intelligent, but education ruined me'.

A friend of mine once told me, all this wont last forever, those we feel are very close to us won’t even be here tomorrow, but it’s those moments that we spent with them that make life special. Don’t mistake me, I am really enjoying my college life, but of late, there is this sinking feeling within me about what it would be after all this? Is it because I am on the brink of entering my last year at college? Is it because I am torn between love and friendship? I don’t really know, but then again I can’t understand lot of things lately anyway. Love, friends, chitchats are all part of college life, they tell me. Well, let me introduce to you some strange characters I meet around here. Not in this post, it would then be too long.

I haven’t felt like writing in a long time, but now I think I should let myself out someway. I can’t blurt out all these feelings in a civilized society like ours, can I? I don’t really know if I will ever post again, but for now I am searching for answers that seem so far away from me.

The Romantic

2009-02-15T20:40:00.000+05:30

Love and never be loved back
Care and never be cared back
Such was the disappointment
that he lay in shambles

His was the smartest voice
His was the foolest choice
He tried to hold on,for so long
Yet the guillotine dropped

In agony,his cry was faint
Yet his mind was still untaint
For love he still looked
For the drop in the ocean

The laughter has long gone
Yet the lives must go on
The stage artist retreats
The curtain has fallen...

My First Post in 2008

2008-08-08T23:31:00.000+05:30

Sounds lazy, right? You bet, I am.

And you knw what? It is a tag again . What's with this amooma and tags? Whenever she makes a tag, she seems to remember me ;). As she once said herself, maybe SNPS favouritism (we both happen to be from the same school, SNPS).

I also got tagged by Pr@tz from njaan.wordpress.com. This tag was different from the other one. Incidentally, he is not ~~njaan~~ who writes njaan.blogspot.com, but this is another one, pr@tz, earlier also known as ~~njaan~~ who writes the wordpress blog. What is with a name and is there any difference?

Anyway to the tag, I took this tag because it looks interesting, interesting enough to break my hibernation from this blog anyway.

So here goes,

Eight Things I am Passionate About

Blogging: Don't judge by the frequency of posts in this blog, its because I have been busy with another blog. It's often sad to hear people say they are not interested in Blogs, because they don't want to read someone's daily diary. Blogging is surely a powerful social interaction tool. Try it, if you are not a blogger yet. Besides the social part, if you are any good, you can make a living out of it too.

Sports : I try to take up anything that I can play. Crazy about football and cricket.

Socialism I was a hardcore socialist to start with, but now-a-days I don't want to care which way I support. The core ideas behind socialism always makes me passionate to it, but what I see in practice prevents from being too passionate about it. In heart a socialist.
Coding What I have done till now is too little to really call coding, but I love the way I can make a program. It's the same with web designing. I did a fair bit of jiggling with all the blog's template I work on. It is interesing to see the results

Music : I love to hear music all the time, and hence I also have a hidden craze for an iPod. I am just able to afford to buy one now, all thanks to blogging.

Motoring : No, its not because of the thrill you get by speeding, but rather because of the easiness of it. I love threading through traffic too. In kollam, you get lots of it. There is always another inch for you to go through

Travelling : Usually alone or with someone talkative(read someone from fairer sex). Though both the travelling experiences I had alone were horrible, I would still like to backpack someday. Waiting to get out of the shell called college life

College: Seems contradictory na? But over the last two years, I have understood that College life is special too, though College studies may never be. The freedom, the flexibility, the craziness, enjoy it!

Eight Things I want to do before I die

Marry: Obviously. Did you know the female:male ratio in Kerala is almost 1200:1000, but I can't find any of those extra 200 anywhere here. sigh

To find and meet a long known but unseen friend of me, whom I met through the good ol' way of yahoo chatting

Sing a song without getting tomatoes or koovals in return. I know I have it, the audience is never there you see. The last time I attempted it, well never mind....

Get over my fear of heights and jump out from an airplane at height, hopefully with a parachute

Give money to someone who is in absolute need of it, when I have enough of it.

Travel to many, if not all, interesting places all over the world, especially Old Trafford, Manchester.

Do something that someone someday will remember me by, positively.

And yeah, some usual things. Show all those ex-girlfriends of me what they missed out on :P, play in the snow, walk on moon, become a billionaire and ....

Eight books/blogs/anything I have read recently

The tale of two cities By Charles Dickens. It was lying dusty here for sometime. Had enough time to read it during the study holidays.

Harishanker Met him via ~~njaan~~ oops pr@atz. Seems like me and him are on parallel roads.

TKMIT College Magazine- Because the editor was my benchmate, He got 10 photos of himself in half as many pages. All we get in our magazine is illustrations of life of Great Communist leaders. I support communism too, but isn't that too bad stuff for a college magazine?

Backroom Tech. It's a technical blog, interesting...

Injipennu From Naalukettu Been reading all the high drama stuff related to this blog. Njaan evide illathayi poyallo( translate asI wish I was here). If it's not too late, I too protest against those unethical morons over at Kerals.com.

C and C++ programming Books

Balarama- Still loves soothran and sheru, yeah go on, you can call me a child.

Mobile SMS es - Latest one : 'U knw wat, a girl actually called me the other day and said, "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home...'

That's it. I am running out of ideas and sleep. Now I have to tag someone back. This is the most easiest part of writing a tag I think, payback. I was planning to give it back to Penakathi, but alas, she has already taken the same tag from ~~njaan~~ pr@tz .

So I tag njaan at njaan.blogspot.com, clever na? it's not to the wordpress one who tagged me and harisanker, because he does not seem to have answered any of the tags.

GETTING TAGGED

2007-07-07T21:14:00.000+05:30

So.......

Blogger tells me this is a post here after a very long time. It wasn’t because I was lazy (wink) but I was busy with the other blog which is, say, more rewarding than this one. Peep into it too sometimes. Livewares-The free softwares blog. See the effect? Now it has become a habit to advertise it all over net. To those few who will ever read this, you are about to read some secrets.

And to the matter at hand, getting tagged. After getting blogs, getting IM’s, spams, scraps and whatever things crazy weirdos brought out, this seems to be latest with bloggers. You give a tag to some person and he/she should put a post in her blog depicting 8 facts or habits about them. It’s a game, far better than some of those stupid games in orkut communities so I thought, what the devil, lets do it. For the records, I got tagged by this amooma.

The rules of this game, as ignited to me by amooma, are as follows:

* Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
* People who are tagged need to write posts in their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
* At the end of your post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.

Well, I wonder what people do to pass time now-a-days. There seem to much fewer people chatting over net now-a-days. Maybe all are invisible to me. (Sigh)

So to the game and here are the 8 commandments:

1. The first one is always easy. I am an optimistic though recent happenings have dented it. These include a suspended adsense account (u can feel it around this blog), a suspended yahoo email id which was mine for over 3 years (how dare they?) and, the ever present no-use-at-all harder than steel, exams. But hakuna matata, says me.

2. I love reading so much. But that, of course, was before I got a PC. The books are a real friend to those in loneliness. As my priorities changed, ‘The White Queen’(its not a new one, Victorian times), ‘The People Next door’, ‘The Sherlock Holmes’ and all fell to the back shelves. Maybe I will look them all up when the always not-so-far loneliness comes back again.

3. I like to see Sachin, Agassi, Steffi Graph, Beckham and Schumacher on action, but not necessarily in that order. Three of that are not any more in action, one is going for another celebrity stunt and the first guy seems to be in a roller coaster ride at the end of his career. But I love my memories of them though. Sachin in Sharjah, Becks in Manchester United’s colours, Schumi in podium and Graff and Agassi making a very nice pair. Gone are those times, the nostalgist whines.

4. I love kerala from afar as well from inside. But the idea is to get a job in some MNC, make some dough and come back here to start something useful to this beautiful God’s own country. The plan, of course, won’t always work out as scripted.

5. I am running out of options now. Well, the phobias. I am a registered acrophobic, claustrophobic and cricket-ophobic. That last one is, of course, recent. Guess all Indians in one way or other are too..

6. My favourite hobby is walking in the beach with some friends (girls preferably). Since I don’t have both nearby, I compensate by being with them on net.

7. I hate over the head girls and ruthless demolishing persons. For the second reason I completely hate Australian cricket team and Roger Federer. Would like to see both of them lose once in a while just for a change. Hopes, again... No one should be too perfect, what are humans then?

8. I love the words anti hero and maya. The motto I try to follow is something like, If the crowd is going to the right, you should go to the left. This isn’t really the factor why I favor the lefts in the politics of Kerala, but its ideas is.

So it goes….That took me most part of a day to type down. So lets get some tags for others now. I hate to not strike back…so the batton needs to be passed and these are the chosen ones,

a. Miss Honest, The Happy Person….She is my senior actually, but writes pretty well, I should admit.

b. Njaan, Another senior…seems like college pass outs or fall outs are the best bloggers :P He is very popular though.

c. Writings on Sand

d. Irritant

e. Aruninte Blog, because I like it

f. A vagrant Soul, I liked her blog’s first impression

g. Pazhampuranam, nice mblog....that is Malayalam blog not mobile blog

h. Ahh the last one, goes to….Jithuji, because I like poets.

You know, most of them here are strangers to me. But I liked their blogs…so….ahh well, it has been nice getting tagged, but I am not looking eagerly to the next one because for one reason, etreyum blogs tanne oppichatu tanne kastepettaneee….( in english as getting even this much blogs is like a PITA).

And to end it a quote, pardon me to say:

Dream but always with your eyes wide open.

ALONE

2007-05-03T21:07:00.000+05:30

The grasses looked greener
When the bird looked out
And the sounds sweet
When it hopped around
T’was the first small steps
Into the golden unknown
Met many traps on the way
Fell in some but escaped
With scars to remember
Did things that when
Looked back at now
Look darker than grave
It’s all so enigmatic
In a way, all lives are
Saw the spark far off
Sure it was the sun
That it was hoping for
The Promised Land
On it, it day dreamed
Hope soared, brain undone
Can’t say it didn’t
See it coming at it
Nevertheless hoped
Hopes that were soon
Found to be fake
Made to look like
A clown in silk
But enjoyment was
What it looked for there
For the sake of one
Second, it dropped
What now looked at
Seems to be its life
Never again it vowed
Nonetheless a voice says,
It will happen again
Voice of the brain, never
Heard in the clear,
Till the time passes
And it is too late to be of use
Well, it seems the time
Has come for it to move on,
The grasses greener…
The sounds sweeter….

License

2007-04-11T15:55:00.000+05:30

This blog, “innocent Posts“ also known as "iposts", is licensed (unless otherwise specified) under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.5 India License.

You may not reproduce this work for Commercial use without my express permission. Read The Full Legal Code Here. You can contact me via the 'Contact Me' link at the top right corner of this blog.

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Thank You
Achu S

STRANGE

2007-03-25T12:34:00.001+05:30

The stars were shining
So was the moon in sky
But he saw none of that
For his pace was brisk
And his mind was set.

The tree was chosen
For it was quiet here
Far from the terrible
Madness of the city which
Once he too had loved.

He had loved her too
That too with all his heart
She had consented too
Oh! Those were the days
When he was on cloud nine.

He had lived for her then,
Frailty, thy name is woman
HE had rightly said
But he had heeded none of that
How blind he was in love.

Even if you ask him now
He still loves her deeply
But it was she who had said
All that was out and over
How he hated himself now.

This is going to end it all
Death, the sleep he badly needed
Cowards do this, he had heard
He was no coward but nor
Could he live sans her

Stupid you, the world will say
He could hear it clear
But his mind was set
The rope was hung
If only she never left him

Adieu, my love, my life
He tightened the knot
Around his neck, on outside
Around his heart, on inside
The final step onto death.

What is that stupid sound?
Of, it was his crazy cell
Why didn’t it leave him alone
Even in this last moment
But it was a message,

So? But it was from her
I still love you, she says
I want you back, she says
He saw the beauty of the sky
And that of the whole world

Cowards suicide, not him
Sprint he did back,
Back down the road he came
Eager as he was to claim back
His long lost love.

Blind, maybe he was, of love
For he never saw the truck that came
Neither did she saw his face again
For it was plastered all over the road.

Left or Right?

2007-03-18T14:58:00.001+05:30

It’s not quite right in God’s own country

As you may know, God’s own country is of course the small rich state called kerala in the big exciting country called India. But you can find little of the god and very much of the devil in this great state. The ruling party here now-a-days are the left front parties whose government which, even in our own chief minister’s humble opinion, has not started functioning even half an year after they were sworn in.

After all the chaos created by the last government this present government in the state of kerala was sworn in with, as usual, many a hopes. And, as usual, they failed to live up to it. May it be in the education, administration or the security department they have not yet quite fallen into a rhythm. But you have to give credit to them that they are faring much better than their predecessors. In this context there may be many arguments but still one can easily say that at least the Chief Minister has been better.

Scandals have occurred in plenty for the labourers’ party govt but they have weathered it well till now, except for the one minister, Mr. P.J.Joseph, falling prey to an on-the-air scandal. You can get a scandal of any name now-a-days in kerala thanks to the booming Media culture. The bullet scam, ice cream parlour scam, email scam, president going wrong way scam etc etc. Wow! That’s almost enough to make one scream. Well, they are true to some extent but some are just blown out of proportions especially by the media. You just can’t believe some of the things these media guys dig up.

I have always been a believer of the left-ist theories but as I get a first hand exposure of a left government now-a-days, I feel that all those theories are better read than put into practice. They just don’t seem practical in this hectic world. So you have to make compromises to all those theories and modify it so as to make it more suited for this world just like the Bengal government has been doing. But that is where the governments in kerala have failed. They are just so into making there chairs comfortable that they become blind to the opportunities that come their way. For example an express highway which would have become just a huge boom in the state’s economy just because of the internal conflicts within the government and between the ruling and opposition parties. The present government is no different in being indifferent to the progress of the state. At least one can have hope in the fact that the chief minister Mr. (gr8) V.S. Achutananthan has been a little different in his approach. If he is just being average it’s just ‘coz he does not have enough support and some of his ideas have to be readapted to the present era.

So if the all the governments have been so careless, is kerala not developing? Of course, it is. You can see it in the cities as well as in the villages alike. The new buildings, the new roads, the new projects…..but something that you can also see is a laid back attitude prevailing here and there. An efficient population of kerala can just be found in the middle class. They, not surprisingly, work to make their life better (who isn’t? but still), in other words, have profit motives and hence they need to be efficient and in way of their progress the state itself progresses. So is this actually the driving force in the state? No never it’s a part but there are also many other components that contribute to the state’s prosperity like the huge brain pool, the NRI’s, the labour force, tourism etc….but of course the least contribution has been from the part of the governments’, for sure, at least for the past few years.

Few good enough ministers have come and gone but belief in such surprises by the people have always been short lived. Here, in kerala, the wheels of administration turns real slow but at least it turns. We, the people, hope for a better tomorrow always and this non-exhausting flame drives the tomorrows to come. If the governments are to function what really they must accept is the fact that they have an obligation to the state and they must take up imaginative, maybe a little risky, measures that will pay off in the long run. Of course when you bring out an unorthodox idea there will surely be strong opposition, but wasn’t there always? They have got to believe in the people and not in the crazy game of politics. If they can bring out projects good enough for the people and sustain it in the long run, well you can say, we are going to leap in the field of development.

Critics have always predicted a cyclic pattern of governments in kerala, ie: if it’s the left ruling today, next time around it will be the right(they are the congress party of course sometimes also called the UDF or something). Well this is just b’coz of the people’s discontent with the existing systems that have never worked well enough for them. All this will surely change and if a government performs to their potential they will surely be reelected, cyclic patterns be forgotten. But the question is can they deliver? And if they can, take my word, kerala is the place to look for in the future.

THE TRAGEDY OF A TRAVEL OR A COMEDY OF ERRORS

2007-03-11T21:05:00.001+05:30

(Call it watever u feel after reading it)

                                                      There I was, feeling good all over, on the platform of the huge Bangalore railway station on my first visit to the metro and full of expectations. The purpose that officially brought me there was my medical tests for the NDA and the unofficial purpose of finding out the thrills of living in a metro.

                                                       So I had with me a mobile and in it the contact number, of a distant distant uncle of mine, whom I had never met but whom my father had found out by some struggle and had insisted upon meeting him when I get there. I was hoping he might be around there somewhere on the platform, but no, not even a friendly face nearby. Another co-traveler of mine there for the same reason had found his relative and was moving out. Me too, after one final look around, decided lets see the city. But I was still apprehensive about finding accommodation by my own since I had no hold of the native Kannada language (I am a keralite) and the English I knew wouldn’t do much good with the local auto rickshaw drivers.

                                                       It was then that I decided to call upon this distant uncle of mine and check whether he is around somewhere. Nope he isn’t. Apparently he has just woken up (I forgot to mention the time, it was abt 7 in the morning). Ok he tells me to go to the Greenland hotel (wherever that might be) and I (dumb me, why didn’t I ask those important questions like what am I to do there) thanking him for his precious advice hangs up. Then I was under the impression his house was somewhere near there and he will come and meet me there. I ask the rickshaw driver u know this hotel in my broken Hindi (should have listened to all those Hindi classes at school) and yess Saab get in, he beckons. I didn’t like his sound but what option did I have? So I sit inside that rickety auto taking in my first glimpses of the city. It doesn’t impress me that much and I had this foreboding of something worse to come.

                                              After some twisting and turning the auto winds up in some corner and the driver points to a building some distance away and say that’s the one you were asking for. Why couldn’t he have stopped in front of that??(that question ran through my mind but what use of asking). I get out, pays him the fare he asks and is bewildered by the amount (abt 100 INR) since the drive had taken barely 5 minutes. I wonder, hmmm these metro rickshaws’ charges are quite high. (Later I was informed by one of my Kannada colleagues that that was almost thrice the usual fare for that drive...oh well right. Should’ve expected that one). Now I wander over to the hotel and pointless as to what is to be done next goes into a nearby phone booth and calls that uncle of mine from the contact number in my cell. Well, he tells me to get a room in that five star hotel and asks to call him back after doing that. Well, ok, I thought when in Rome…exits the phone booth heads over to the hotel…nice reception and minimum charge for a room 5000 INR plus advance...

                                           OK right; I had some cash in my bank account so I ask the receptionist guy where the nearest ATM is. He is not very impressed by my looks (I was just completely worn out after a 17 hour journey in the great Indian railways. This was before Lalu ji’s time, after all) but gives directions to the nearest ATM anyway though I had no idea of the places he mentioned. I get out, grabs the nearest auto rickshaw that came my way and, this guy was friendlier, and takes me through a myriad ways and finds me an ATM. I rush in and voila it says “your card is not working, please contact the bank”. I bring in the security’s help and he says Saab, this card is useless. Uh oh, that’s bad, I had abt 500 INR as change in my wallet and I had to spend another day in the city before I was to be there for the medical not forgetting the fare for the present auto rickshaw.

                                                     OK, I get out and then it dawns on me. My cell, I had left it in the phone booth after I had taken it out to get the contact number of that uncle of mine. Uh oh, that’s very bad. I rush up my rickshaw driver back to that starting place and he gets me back through all those paths and back there in about 15 precious minutes. I flash across the road to the booth and looks in. Of course, it’s not there. I try my broken Hindi with the shop owner, brings in the auto driver to the scene and the message is clear, he has to idea about any cell. They try to call my cell number, but of course, there is no coverage there for that stupid network otherwise why should I have gone to a phone booth in the first place. So after much blabbing with no solution in sight, I ring up that uncle of mine (the number was there in the phone booth) and demand he come and see me now. Maybe not so authoritavely, I was almost begging for some help there by that time. I pays off my last rickshaw driver and already saying the prayers for my beloved cell gets hold of my uncle who came in a nice flashy scooty and spends the day over at his rented room in another corner of B’lore.

                                                     I turn up for medical next paying another exorbitant sum for another all-too-familiar auto rickshaw drive to the medical centre from that uncle’s place. The uncle just gave up on the idea of the so-early-in-the-morning-drive and got me an auto instead whose driver had no idea of the address. It was thus that I ended up in the test centre penniless, cell less and only thing comforting was that I was in the company of my beloved colleagues. And that too was short lived as the day wore on and I was disqualified in the medicals due to some eye complications. I was shell shocked by the turn of the day that I never got the courage to ring up at my home until the next day. The explanations were done, my father cleared up the complication with the bank. Well, the other days I went roaming in those so-much-heard-of malls of B’lore and ended up spending almost all of the money from the bank account. My attitude was like what the heck I have nothing to lose now. The problem was that by the time of my departure I had very few cash left in my wallet even to pay for the bus fare back. I had to give up the idea of a dinner on the journey back owing to my wallet’s emptiness.

                                                 The day I boarded my bus back home, the city was brought to a stand still due to a bandh called there over that stupid water issues with Tamil nadu. And for a 9 INR bus journey back to the bus station I was made to pay another 200 bucks for (not another …) a goddamn auto rickshaw drive. The city was all closed up when I left almost as if showing its hostile nature to me that had prevailed around me from the moment I boarded off the train. Well, the next time I plan to go to some metro, that sure as hell wouldn’t be Bangalore, no pun intended about the people there, but you know an experience like that isn’t exactly pleasant. Maybe I was careless, foolish, call me whatever, but that is what you may call an awakening trip.

Wrrooooooommmmmm…….OMG!! I am in kerala

2007-03-10T22:36:00.001+05:30

Need a break from the monotony? Wanna get the adrenaline pumping? I am not talking about any extreme sports from AXN, I am talking about biking in kerala especially in the denser cities and more specifically, if you want life challenging situations, go biking in kollam. It doesn’t matter which bike you choose or the city if you are in a road in kerala you are sure to get your money’s worth (that is the money you spend on the gas). Even if it is just a 10 minutes drive you are sure enough to meet at least a dozen life threateners.

Last time I took a bike out on ehh... one of the busy streets in kollam (that is a city in kerala near its capital Trivandrum) I was almost given a place in hell. It took an almighty call to keep me still on earth. The auto rickshaws keep crossing your path, the unpredictable pedestrians are lurking in every corner and traffic rules well, they are just rules..paper stuff..they don’t matter for the public.

Recently I read a report that kerala has the most number of road accidents in south India. Well, big surprise, I am surprised it’s not among the top in India. Road accidents have become a part and parcel of our existence in this corner of the world. The general public uses auto rickshaws for their general transport, well me too at times, but the problem starts there. The auto rickshaw drivers are the craziest bunch of people around here. The road was laid esp. for them and don’t you dare hit them and if you do then you are headed for big trouble. They are a bunch who doesn’t care which side was right they are always on the auto driver’s side. You will then end up cleaning out your wallet on all-the-goddamn charges made against you.

The pedestrians are the next. You need to be on the watch out 24x7 for them if you are on the roads in kerala. For, be it midnight or noon some of them will always be there to jump across the road as though they have Spiderman to look after them. Well, He isn’t there actually, so you be ready on that break of your vehicle always. And if you hit them, then again public police and in the end all that matters is how fat is your wallet. There is a common effect seen esp. in the pedestrians in kerala, if they see a traffic light telling them it is safe to cross the road they cross it and if they see a red light telling them its unsafe to cross, well they still cross the road. The yellow lines in the road means don’t cross it, well at least that is what the traffic personnel tell us. For the drivers it just another color in the road. They cross them at will.

And after you have passed all these myriad of tests when you just start to relax, there comes that odd bump on the road and then another and you end up playing road rash live the opponents not your fellow drivers but the traps on the road. You will at least hit one even if your journey is shorter than a 100m sprint.

The maximum speed allowed here on bikes is 50 kmph but you can above it if you like there are no radars here to check your speed, but you do it at your own risk. Even if some one in traffic uniform signals you down don’t worry b’coz even then if you wallet is big enough you are safe enough. Yep that’s the truth over here but the good thing if you want to horn your hand eye co ordination or get some thrills for the moment all you have to do is a get a bike and let’s go riding in the roads in kerala. In the worst case scenario you may find yourselves in ambulance but don’t worry our hospitals are ultra specialists by now in such cases. But you can be content that you had the ride of a lifetime. Maybe we should get those out of form cricketers of India over here to bike, you know, just to get their co ordination back……

The never ever love

2007-03-02T21:25:00.001+05:30

My heart is beating

A million times for you

Voices of the brain murmurs

I am wrong to love you,

But my heart is going

Wild for you, lady

The voice is heard again

It’s foolish to love you.

Am I that blind enough,

Not to see the hopeless end?

The questions gather around

But they seem so pale

In my love for her.

I want her so badly

But still can’t reach out

For her oh so soft hands

They are so far away

But when I think about her

The mind races again

I know I am wrong to love

I know I am being absurd

I know I am dreaming up

Things never going to happen,

Then why do I still love her?

B’coz,

My heart is still beating

A million times for you….

UNORTHODOX IS THE WAY TO GO

2007-02-25T21:31:00.001+05:30

Looking for a way to improve things?? Being fed up of getting too many wrong results? Maybe you need to change the way you go about things. All of us in some part of our life or other hit upon a snag such that everyone seems to be working just against you. The bike won’t start, the long time girlfriend dumps you, you get stuck with the no-worse-guy-than-me of your class for an hour of stupid lecture, marks are at an all time low etc etc. It maybe just b’coz all those ideas and tricks you have been relying on for so long may just have become outdated. We all follow certain rules in our life, yeah even those who yell ‘rules r to b broken’ still have some rules in their lives. Ranging from not switching off your pc to putting the key in its sockets there are rules. What I am trying to tell you is that you have to go out of bounds of some these rules so as to suit your day to day requirements.

For example, when the bike doesn’t start what one usually does? Looks for an alternate transportation right? Now that is just an orthodox out-of-fashion system. Why not, for instance, roll the bike along to your nearest exchange shoppe and get a new one. Yeah, I know, your wallet may not support it but remember this is just an example. You may necessarily not do this the next time you have a break down but you can do similar out of usual way things. One never knows, just one of those things may just change your life for ever (for the better or worse is another matter altogether). Hear this story of one of my friends who met a girl online from America. Now here is just another boy meets girl starting. But what is different here is the girl had the most eccentric stories about her own life. Starting with her grandfather bewitching her at birth to having two other personalities within herself (she called them her twin sisters). These personalities often used to come alive just while those two people were talking online. It was just so weird. But this guy who would not have given the girl a second look is he had met her on a footpath just got so intrigued with her that he started chatting with her and sustained it for several months and voila, now they are married off. He is still in debt with several of his friends for the money he borrowed for making overseas telephone calls. Though she is not what you may call stunning he just fell for her uncommon attitude.

So the lesson goes when you run out of ideas look just for that uncommon, unorthodox mix to spice up that beautiful journey called life. History and present are so full of examples of unorthodox ideas finding success in mind boggling proportions. Alex Tew is just an example whose idea of the crazy million dollar webpage made him, of course, a millionaire. So the next time you hit up a snag don’t worry smack out all those radical orthodox conventional useful ideas and start something uncommon. This may and should never be taken as an impetus to jump of the bridge just because it is an unorthodox idea. All I am asking you is make up a practical unconventional idea.

Let your thoughts nurture on it for a moment and if the figment of your brain’s imagination accepts it then why wait? Jump in and try it. Success may not always be yours but still there is no harm in trying. The ways of life are so eccentric that you just may not know where the luck is hiding. Even if you are an intellect who goes by the logical way of reasoning things out it does help once in a while to change old customs and think of new innovative ways. After all if everyone followed the rules, life would have been so dull ain’t it? Who knows you may just hit upon the craziest idea that may just what your life may have been so badly in need of. So when the next time your girl friend threatens to dump you, don’t jump into the long list of loved and lost guys, just walk out on her and take a looooong vacation.

P.S: The author should not be held responsible for any physical harm that may come your way while trying out or following some of the suggestions.

THE CHOICE IS NEVER YOURS

2007-02-17T22:47:00.001+05:30

The rain drops are falling,

A far off cry is heard

Unclear over the crowd

In and out over the rain

A cry for help sounds loud

Strangers around keep walking

The source is searched for

But it seems hidden,

Faces impassive block the way

The agony’s core is found at last

And what did the eyes beheld?

The face I see everyday

Wailing on helplessly

Over the dead past,

And the beckoning future,

Made to make a choice

All too soon and fast;

The voice gathers again

Louder and thicker it seems

Still the strangers walk on,

Not even sparing a glance

The face still wails on

A face full of youth

A face I see everyday,

On the mirror looking

More shaken each day

The hopes ebbing out,

Can’t you hear the cry?

Education in Kerala

2007-02-17T22:38:00.001+05:30

We live in a world where the need for faster and less time-consuming methods is constantly in demand. Yet what do one see when one goes to the so-called educational institutions in our god’s own country? How many times have we whined about the utter uselessness about the subject being taught? Still it’s the monotonous routine that wins every time. The hours that were wasted studying the stupid theories of mutation if spend in any other field, it seems, would surely have been more useful.

In kerala, mainly in the universities and higher grades, the systems are streamlined such that one tends to take up either the engineering or medicine fields. And of course the latter one is more valued now-a-days with the latter course. But all I am asking is why can’t one pursue his natural ambitions if it is clashing with the above mentioned fields? For example, just think of a person with good literary skills. If he wants to pursue a course in literature, there is nothing like an assured system in which he can go higher. Of course he can take up a bachelor degree in literature which is down the drains with respect to a job opportunity and the most probable job you end up with will that be of a teacher. I am not telling teaching is a bad profession but what if one wants to go beyond that? Honestly I see the options very limited. I also know many a graduates who had take up the job teaching just because they were left without any jobs even after passing out from prestigious colleges from prestigious departments. What is the root of this? If you tell me the problem is with the person and not with the system as many pass outs have glamorous jobs I would say you are right in 40%of the cases. You can never say it’s always the case. The problem is though we preach job oriented education 24x7 none of our existing educational systems are actually not even near that. The true facts about the numerous campus recruitments that take place each year is never publicized. What the graduates have to undergo as a result of their placement jobs is that the multi billion companies ooze out of them what abilities they have in return for a paltry sum that may not even leave much enough after meeting one’s primal needs. And this makes many a graduates think that they should have been better off with the tutorial jobs. Even in the most prestigious of the engineering colleges in kerala one can never get what one’s soul hopes for. It’s still the Stone Age system of exams and assignments that’s being followed. What has this system delivered? A horde of jobless youngsters and a growing recklessness. Many of the problems in educational institution, including ragging and strikes, can be attached to this inability of the educational system to go along with the basic instincts of students. Instead they are made to follow the system and in due course everyone protests. If you ask an engineering student when was the last time he was truly interested in a class, the answer nearest to the truth would be that it was in the lower grades in school where the claws of this manipulating system is not felt so strongly. The problem is more acute in engineering system rather than its medical counterpart because in the latter one there is the assuredness of a sound job even if you pass out barely whereas in the former nothing like that is even probable. The students are under constant pressure to perform to the needs of the system rather than work to bring out the goodness in them. The ability to develop one’s inner self is so much limited. This leads to a question of the thriving of a genius in a hostile environment. It is useless to argue that the genius in anyone will come out in one way or other whatever be the given circumstances. Trust me, if Einstein was brought up in the system in kerala he would never have invented anything nor would any theories have been formulated by him. I am not telling the system in not without its gains but on comparison any one can find that it’s vastly outdated. So would giving more job orientation help? To some extent it may but the true need lies in development of personal skills. Everyone from advertisement hoardings to our prime minister tells me India is a quickly developing economy. But it’s correct to say that unless this system in basic institutions of the country is changed nothing major will happen. It’s not only the IIT’s and IIM’s that needs the attention; the major attention should be to make the system in the thousands of engineering colleges not only in kerala but also in other states which produces the majority of graduates each year. I happened to hear a conversation between two college lecturers about the system of engineering colleges now-a-days. And truly I was not shocked to hear that a B.Tech degree could now be obtained even without passing any exam just by the sole power of money. Well just such things have totally degraded the quality of these colleges. So a probable solution should be to start finding the true genius within a child at a tender age and provide choices to him which suits his needs. Unlike today’s world the options are more or less limited; if we can create several choices for a person with equal weightage and develop a system which is more job oriented rather than knowledge oriented the situation will surely change. Oh I can see many of teachers preaching acquisition of knowledge above need for a job. This may have been the case in the gone by decades but as far as I can see in the coming years a job suiting your inner needs would be much much valuable than all the knowledge one can gather. As the saying goes, “choose a job you love and you will never have to work for a day”. It may not seem very ethical but that’s the grand truth as far as I can see.

SER QUERIDO

2007-02-16T23:56:00.001+05:30

I look around me
I see strange faces
that means nothing to me
I see none who knows me
Where did it all go wrong?
I ask myself
knowing the answer is there
Deep in my heart
I'm afraid to open it
If only it was all true
True that she loved me
True that I loved her
But it was true that
it was something special with her
Oh, you say, there its again
Love and life,
the two bitter enemies
former the sweeter
latter the essential
that rarely goes together.
But I ask myself again
Where did it go wrong?
I know it was not that
it was neither's mistake
T'was fate the villain
if only I met her first,
I donno whether its all true
or it would've changed any better,
But then again
you can always hope
even if it is only
hopelessly hoping....

The City called Quilon a.k.a kollam

2007-02-16T23:39:00.001+05:30

Kollam or the lesser known quilon is a large enough town which got the distinction of a city by some stroke of fate. But when look into the finer aspects of this city u find that its equal and often much better in many aspects when compared to the more famous cities u have been to. I have often bored of living most my eighteen years already passed in this little city but to say the truth i feel that there's still a great part of this left unexplored.

Its just that whenever i get so upset as of getting stuck in this place this little city springs up something or other on to me. At first sight kollam is nothing compared to the other posh cities. Nothing much pleasing at first sight. Just a city with not enough space in its roads (the National highway is almost a one lane in some places) , too much pollution and nothing of the so called natural beauty. But this is where this city deceives you. I have often heard my friends from other cities in kerala about the absence of nothing exciting in kollam. Yeah! i say, If you are looking for glamourous malls and dance clubs to freak out u wont find much in kollam but if u want to find a place their is a gentleness of the nature and heckness of a city there is no place better than quilon.

There is the college junction road where u can stand for hours passing your time watching the most entertaining actors which are the passer-bys. It is in that road where hundreds of generations of couples of all ages have gone through, i say especially couples bcoz this part of quilon is the home of most of the romeos of this city.U will just be amazed at the amount of students that pass thorugh this footpath one day. Ok i know u have been to busier places but this place is soo cool to hang out with ur friends or idly spend time watching other passer-by's going with their hectic lives. There is also a lane around here which would suit the name lovers lane but it has an unwanted advantage of having a cemetry on its one side. We used to go there after our night tuition classes and the more brave one's among us have jumped the compound wall and of course it would all end with us all running back (well most of us).

From the tourism point of view this city has a beautiful backwater lake called astamudi lake but honestly i have never enjoyed a ride in that lake mostly because the beauty of this lake begins and ends in its caption only. Maybe for the adventurers and those who want some seclusion u can always venture out in a boat. The administration of kollam ,like almost anywhere else in kerala, is no good at doing anything to the city to improve it but still we can take pride that we are atleast a municipality.

But above all this the heart of kollam is the people. u can almost get any sort of people around here be it be the soft one's or the hearts-of-stone types. I had an incident in which i ran out of money in a post office when trying to send a parcel for my friend and i ended up requesting for money, oh why mince words, i had to beg for it and i met cold faces all around there until a kind enough young man had the heartiness to supply me with the required sum. It proved to me a great lesson every man has to play all the roles one sees in his life one time or another. It just goes that whenever one has the ability he should help those in need. So the quilonians maybe tough but they are gentle. But u have to fight to survive here.

If u need help around this city u will most probably find it from the common and young people. U cant see many feminists in this city since most of the households are of the conservative type but there exists so much variety in these houses that u maybe amazed at the volume this city contains. Go deep, meet people u will feel the soundness of this city. The picture is changing rapidly everyday. I can see the city evloving day and night. I see daring girls walking the paths and the conservative in me wince but i guess the city needs all this.All in all this city which many-a-metropolitans will call a village is surely that will surprise you if you dig deep into it...and in fact I LOVE THIS CITY