Susannah Conway

On accidental sabbaticals

susannah — Mon, 20 May 2013 02:23:19 PDT

I’ve just got back from a week away with my family. We were celebrating my mother’s 70th birthday and I was reassured there’d be internet in the house we’d rented (in a remote corner of Devon) so I brought my laptop with me, planning to squeeze in a bit of work. Blogging from the Heart was starting on Monday, my Unravelling group were about to enter week six, I have a bunch of ebooks to update urgently, not to mention the not-so-small matter of a book proposal to get finished………. BUT THERE WAS NO INTERNET!!!!

I panicked for the first hour. The thing I fear most in this little biz of mine is letting people down, and not being able to email, check the course Facebook and Flickr groups and be there for everyone when they need me is one of my worst case scenarios. Luckily I have an amazing part-time assistant (hi Nita!) who helps me out, and I discovered if I climbed up a hill and stood in someone’s garden I was able to access a sliver of internet, but standing in the rain shielding your laptop with an umbrella is not the best way to work. So last week I had to relinquish my need for online connectivity, and accept that, other than the occasional bit of signal on my phone, I was taking an accidental sabbatical.

I had moments when I wished I could do a quick Google search to find a piece of information. I missed Pinterest and Instagram, the two places I sink into for visual inspiration. I hated being so absent from my course peeps.

On the other hand, I did not miss Twitter or Facebook in the slightest. I also forgot all about my Google Reader — when I got back home on Saturday afternoon I skimmed through the blog posts I’d missed and came away an hour later feeling drained and despondent. Life online suddenly felt so uninspiring compared to a week out in the real world, something i want to hold on to as I endeavour to break out of my hermit ways — balance is needed!

We packed a lot into our week away, and being a full-time auntie for seven whole days was pretty much the Best Thing Ever. Every morning I had my wake up call from a three-year-old cutie opening the curtains and saying: ‘Wake up, Susie, the shine is out!’ My brother-in-law cooked us the most amazing meals all week; we played on the beach; fed “baby sheepies” and a tank full of insane grey mullet; saw deer, rabbits, swallows, bats and owls; watched a ferret race; shepherded a flock of sheep back into a field; held a starfish; explored a pirate ship; discovered a bluebell wood; marvelled at the beauty of nature; walked the Jurassic coastline; met Meggy and Indy, two of the loveliest dogs ever; ate the best fish n chips; fell in love with Lyme Regis; collected shells, pebbles, feathers, fossils and crystals; rode on a tram; taught Noah how to say my “big name” (Sus-nana); had two barbeques; got soaked in the rain; and loved the hot tub.

My favourite moment was Noah choreographing an entire dance routine to a Taylor Swift song, which we then copied down to the very last bum wiggle :)

It was an epic adventure and now I’m sitting here missing Noah like mad. As we said goodbye I tried to explain to him that I had to go back to London to go to work, but that I’d see him again soon. “But I need you, Susie,” he said. And I tried to do that thing where you’re smiling through your tears because you don’t want them to be sad, but I don’t know if I was very convincing. So I just kept cuddling him and kissing his cheeks and promising that I’d come and see his big boy bed soon. And that we’d play ‘Punzel and Nugene. And that he could come to London soon and we’d go see the dinosaurs.

I miss you, baba!

Wish you were here

susannah — Tue, 14 May 2013 10:29:09 PDT

Something for the weekend

susannah — Fri, 10 May 2013 06:34:36 PDT

Our newest set of notecards are now available for pre-order!

[video] Astronauts on the overview effect (this made me a bit teary!) via Amy

The eternal spring — wisdom from Rachel

New (to me) magazines I’m loving: Cereal | Flow | Libertine

Dash and Bella

Inspired by Natalie Massenet of Net-a-Porter.com’s Instagram biography

[video] What the internet is doing to our brains

Grandmother Power: A Global Phenomenon

Cilantro-lime sardine salad | avocado salad | golden quinoa salad

Anyone tried the Days app yet?

[video] Inspiration bomb with Kemi Nekvapil

And finally, the spring session of Blogging from the Heart starts on Monday so I’ll leave registration open for one more day if you’d like to join us. Plus! Dates for the next sessions of my other classes have (finally!) been posted here xo

Notes on being a hermit

susannah — Wed, 08 May 2013 13:13:40 PDT

The older I get the more I like being on my own. This is not a bad thing as I spend the vast majority of my time actually alone. I work from home and I live alone. I am single. I’m an introvert and find large groups of people exhausting (one-on-one I love). I’m not particularly shy, and can be downright gregarious in the right situation, but on the whole, I prefer my own company.

For many years, this was a problem. The three big relationships of my life were with extroverted men who had lots of friends and like to hit the town at every opportunity. New Year’s Eve was always a battle as they (and yes, all three of them felt the same) wanted to go out and have THE BIGGEST NIGHT EVAH!!! and I wanted to stay at home, light candles and ease into the new year thoughtfully and calmly. I’m sure you can guess who won those battles. One of the greatest joys of these last eight years on my own has been getting to welcome each new year in exactly the way I want.

It’s only in the last few years I’ve truly accepted that this really is how I am. For the longest time I thought my lack of sociability meant there must be something fundamentally wrong with me. My twenties were a blur of college, first jobs, relationships and trying my best to be the extrovert I thought I was supposed to be. I tried, I really did, but it was exhausting. And then another party invite would arrive and we’d go but I’d spend the whole time wishing I was at home. Now I understand how introverts and extroverts work my twenties and early 30s make so much more sense to me. Honestly, this stuff ought to be taught in school — how much easier would life be if we understood how we processed the world right out the gate? Rather than being made to feel we’re boring or strange for liking — sometimes preferring — our alone time.

I’m pondering all of this because this introvert is preparing to put herself back out into the land of dating. I’m remembering my previous attempts at on-line dating and wondering if there are any guys out there who don’t need to have the Biggest Night Evah on New Year’s Eve. Eighty percent of me would rather stay at home than go on what is basically a blind date. I like it here! It’s calm and soothing and all my favourite things are around me. After the rocky start to the new year I’m in a good place, emotionally, so why would I want to risk that? But then there’s this pesky twenty percent….. the part of me that misses the kind of companionship where you can be alone together, quite happily, on a lazy Sunday afternoon. The kisses, the love, the building-a-future-together. The delicious stuff that requires another person be in the same room as you…

It’s time to leave the hermitage.

Soundtrack to your life | Sas Petherick

susannah — Sun, 05 May 2013 12:02:45 PDT

Today I’d like to introduce you to my friend, Sas. We met online back in 2010 and our first in-person date was actually a whole weekend at my place in Bath (I’ve since learned that Mr P not only drove her from their home in London but hung around nearby in case I was a psycho and she needed rescuing. Ha!) Since then we’ve been on plenty of escapades and put the world to rights MANY times. Sas recently stepped into her true calling as a life transformer (aka life coach) and I honestly can’t think of anyone more suited to that job. This month she’s leading the first session of emBODYment, her online program for women who want body peace — how awesome does that sound?

She asked me to share the Soundtrack to my Life over on her blog today, so I thought it only right that she does the same over here. Meet Sas!

history

When were you happiest? Right now, is marvellous. Most of the last decade has been about healing; working through grief and all the ‘stuff’ brought up by this big love with Mr P, irrecoverably changing my body with kindness, and stretching into my real purpose. I turn 40 in a couple of months and I feel awake, open, happy and so grateful. Nora Ephron was so right: ‘everything is copy’.

What was the most important thing that happened to you as a child? I had open heart surgery at four years old to correct a hereditary Atrial Septal Defect and Pulmonary Murmur (which is just fancy talk for a heart with a hole in it and an extra beat). In the early 1970s in New Zealand, this was an experimental procedure. Because she never expected me to survive, Mum poured everything into my early years – I could read and write from the age of three. Every day was an amazing adventure.

To whom would you most like to say sorry, and why? to Mum. For taking the precious years we had together completely for granted.

What song best explains the soundtrack to your teenage life? Must I Paint you a Picture, Billy Bragg

heart

What does love feel like? It’s like coming home; its so simple and easy. And yet its profoundly extraordinary. It took me a long time to learn how to be loved. And to love myself.

What is the dumbest thing you have done in the name of love? So many things! From awful teenage poetry, to losing my self-belief.

What three qualities must/does your life partner possess? He is thoughtful, kind, and he makes me laugh.

What is your favourite love song? Feeling Good, Nina Simone and Keep Me In Your Heart, Warren Zevon

life

What is your secret job title? Wielder of the Magic.

What traits do you deplore in others? Any kind of fundamentalism – there is just no room for possibility.

What is your greatest life lesson (so far)? We are not our thoughts, feelings, bodies or actions. At the root of the root of all of us and everything, is love.

What song would you like played at your funeral? Goodbye Old Girl, Art Farmer and Short People, Randy Newman

home

What is your most treasured possession? A handwritten letter from Mum.

What is your favourite daily ritual? I recently bought a vibrating face cleanser (really) and it has changed my freakin’ life! I use it every morning and night and I love how soft and smooth my skin is.

Who are the five people you would love to host at afternoon tea? I have so many questions for Janet Frame, Buckminster Fuller, Christopher Hitchens, Julia Child and my maternal grandmother who died a decade before I was born.

What song feels like home? Not Given Lightly, Chris Knox. This song is the smell of a BBQ and sunscreen and the sand between my toes. Its the sound of clinking glasses and the kids playing beach cricket. There’s nothing quite like a New Zealand summer evening *homesick face*

body

How do you take care of your body? Tonnes of water, SPF 86, rest and play. And good chocolate.

What has your body taught you? Everything. Who I am in the world is all because of my body. I navigate every decision in my life through my intuition (Sas Nav. Ha.) which lives in my body. I have such a deep, conscious trust for my body which feels kind of miraculous given how long I was completely indifferent to it.

If reincarnation is a thing, what body do you want to possess in your next life? No question: a beloved cat.

What song never fails to make you feel un-freakin-stoppable? Born Slippy, Underworld

soul

What feeds your soul? Stories. There is nothing like an uninterrupted hour with a book. Or a conversation with someone who knows me well and loves me anyway.

What do people thank you for? For showing up and for the laughs.

If you were to be remembered for one thing, what would you like it to be? For being the kind of friend you could count on to help hide the body.

What song feels like it was written about you? Let Go, Frou Frou

[Photos by Xanthe Berkeley]

Something for the weekend

susannah — Fri, 03 May 2013 09:28:47 PDT

[video] On owning our authority and the imposter syndrome — Tanya rocked it out at TEDx

Thug Kitchen is currently my favourite site on the web (f-bombs ahead!)

Chickpea saute | cucumber avocado salad | veggie tower

[video] Bottled history

Loving these candles | these perfumes | this | this?

Victoria made an app!

Pen & Ink

[video] Anne Lamott & Cheryl Strayed in conversation (this is AWESOME)

Is it weird that this bloke is my new style icon? ;-)

The disapproval matrix

The power of a single intention – interview with Patti Digh

Sarah on our little life processes ( i have many)

[video] Donna and Leslie get triggered

Happy weekend, loves! xo

Finding your way online

susannah — Thu, 02 May 2013 11:51:39 PDT

I recorded this video for Amanda over at Kind Over Matter last year as part of the virtual book tour for This I Know. With registration for Blogging from the Heart currently open it seemed like a good time to share it again :) It was fun watching it back, seeing my old Bath flat again. So much has changed since then!

Have you ever made a video for your blog? I’m currently working on a post about how to make videos that are a) easy to do b) look nice and c) don’t make you cringe when you watch them back. I’m talking lo-fi ease rather than high-def forensic clarity. It’s one thing to put our thoughts online in words but quite another to let your actual face be seen, with your strange mannerisms and wrinkles on show for all the world to see. So much easier to hide our less favourite bits in an Instagram selfie (I know you know what I’m saying. Thank god for the Walden filter, yes?). Video is all the rage online these days, and while i won’t be making Susannah TV any time soon, i might share a few more here as i do love making them for my classes.

If you have any questions about making videos leave a comment and I’ll do my best to weave the answers (if I know them) into a future post. xo

Coming up for air

susannah — Wed, 01 May 2013 03:10:15 PDT

I’ve been deep in the creation cave for the last six weeks and as my journalling course draws to an end this week I’m finally peeking outside and reflecting on all that’s gone down. It’s been intense, people. INTENSE. I’ve chalked up about 25,000 words for this course which is half the length of my book, so it’s no wonder my RSI has flared up and I’m feeling rather drained. But oh, it’s been glorious too! Periods of such intense creative work may take me away from this blog (and I’ve missed you so much, I’ve been counting down the days till I could write here again) but it also opens up my brain to new ideas and connections. While I’ve been birthing Journal Your Life I’ve had so many ideas for new courses, new possibilities, new directions I want to take. I’ve had a new book idea. I’ve dreamt up a line of products I want to create — actual physical things to send out into the world. I’ve had new ideas for my magazine column (hello Simple Things, I’m looking at you). And I’ve been plotting some deliciousness to celebrate my book’s one year anniversary in June (you’re going to love it :) So while being in the creation cave is full-on, it’s also incredibly fertile.

It’s important to me to create a new course in real time. I have the structure and content plotted out beforehand and get the first two weeks written before the class starts. But I like to create the rest of the course as we go along so I can listen to feedback and do the exercises right alongside everyone else. This is what makes the course come alive. Once or twice I’ll hit a day when I’m not sure I have anything to say, so that’s when I go out for a walk with my notebook to get some new perspective. And sure enough the lesson gets downloaded into my brain and I know what I’m going to write. Every time I run a course it gets tweaked and perfected as there are always new insights to add and better ways to share information. That’s why i love to run these classes — they change and evolve just like we do.

I am so proud of Journal Your Life, and as I said to my peeps in a video last week, I could so easily keep writing this baby. It’s made me realise that at some point in the not-too-distant future I’d like to create a much longer course or program. Six or eight weeks is great for an intense journey into a topic, but I can see how beneficial a three or six-month program would be, taking you so much deeper into the material with breathing space woven throughout. I’m working on it…

When I entered the cave it was winter outside my doorstep, but now I see that spring has finally — miraculously — arrived in Londontown. I have ideas blossoming and stories I want to share here. It feels so good to be back xo

Something for the weekend

susannah — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 04:55:34 PDT

40 inspiring workplaces of the famously creative

Don’t go outside

How to accept yourself — wisdom from Martha

[video] The Beginning of the universe, for beginners

What my fear block needed to say to me — this from Jenn

On Etsy lately: this | this | this

[video] John Cleese on creativity

30 abandoned places that look truly beautiful

Mati’s Daring Adventures in Paint starts on Monday!

So inspired by this beautiful home

[videos] Dallas and Dynasty – hello my teenage years (the Dallas theme was so much cooler)

On social media & keeping it real – smarts from Sarah

[video] Thoughts on the creative career

And finally, Robot Unicorn Attack. You’re welcome ;-)

Lately

susannah — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 13:28:00 PDT