Think: Have we ever heard Obama speak lovingly of the U.S. or its people, with deep appreciation and genuine respect for our history, our customs, our sufferings and our blessings? Has he ever revealed that, like most patriotic Americans, he gets “goose bumps” when a band plays “The Star Spangled Banner,” or sheds a tear when he hears a beautiful rendition of “America the Beautiful?” Does his heart burst with pride when millions of American flags wave on a National holiday – or is he moved to sadness and reflection when someone plays “taps” on a trumpet? Has he ever felt the depth of our admiration of the military, as lovers of those who keep America free feel when soldiers march by? It is doubtful – because Obama did not grow up sharing our experiences or our values. He did not sit at the knee of a grandfather or uncle who showed his medals and told of the bravery of his fellow troops as they fought and tramped through foreign lands sacrificing for a cause greater than their own lives. He didn’t have grandparents who told stories of suffering and then coming to America, penniless, and the opportunities they had for building a business and life for their children.

Away from this country as a young child, Obama didn’t delight in being part of America and its greatness. He wasn’t singing our patriotic songs in kindergarten, or standing on the roadside for a holiday parade and eating a hot dog, or lighting sparklers around a campfire on July 4th as fireworks exploded over head, or placing flags on the gravesites of fallen and beloved American heroes.

Rather Obama was separated from all of these experiences. He doesn’t really understand us and what it means to be an American. He is void of the basic emotions that most feel regarding this country and is insensitive to the instinctive pride we have in our national heritage. His opinions were formed by those who either envied us or wanted him to devalue the United States and the traditions and patriotism that unite us.

Obama has never given a speech that is filled with calm, reassuring, complimentary, heartfelt statements about all the people in the U.S. Or one that inspires us to be better, grateful, and proud that, in a short time, our country became a leader, and a protector of so many. Quite the contrary, his speeches always degenerate into mocking, ridiculing tirades as he faults our achievements ,along with any of his critics, all for the sake of a laugh, or to bolster his ego. He uses his Office to threaten and create fear while demeaning and degrading anyone who opposes his policies and actions. Unlike a secure leader, who has noble self-esteem and not false confidence, Obama displays a cocky, haughty attitude and a dread of being critiqued.
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Obviously we at IMAO do not condone vandalizing other people’s property.

But, speaking strictly for myself, “I understand”.

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IRS Agent: Stop. Who would apply for tax exemption must answer me these questions three, ere that exemption he will see.

Move on Member: Ask me the questions, IRS Agent. I am not afraid.

IRS Agent: What… is your name?

Move on Member: My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.

IRS Agent: What… is your quest?

Move on Member Member Lancelot: To seek tax exemption per the law.

IRS Agent: What… is your favorite color?

Move on Member Lancelot: Blue.

IRS Agent: Go on. Off you go.

Move on Member Lancelot: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.

TEA Party Members: That’s easy.

IRS Agent: Stop. Who would apply for tax exemption must answer me these questions three, ere that exemption he will see.

TEA Party Member: Ask me the questions, IRS Agent. I’m not afraid.

IRS Agent: What… is your name?

TEA Party Member: Sir Robin of Camelot.

IRS Agent: What… is your quest?

TEA Party Member Robin: To seek tax exempt status per the law.

IRS Agent: What… is the capital of Assyria?

[pause]

TEA Party Member Robin: I don’t know that.

[his application is held up for over three years]

TEA Party member Robin: Auuuuuuuugh.

IRS Agent: Stop. What… is your name?

Next TEA Party Member: Sir Galahad of Camelot.

IRS Agent: What… is your quest?

TEA Party Member Galahad: I seek tax exempt status per the law

IRS Agent: What… is your favorite color?

TEA Party Member Galahad: Blue. No, yel…

[his application is also held up for three years and he audited by the IRS going back five years.]

TEA Party Member Galahad: auuuuuuuugh.

IRS Agent: Hee hee heh. Stop. What… is your name?

Last TEA Party Member: It is ‘Arthur’, King of the Britons.

IRS Agent: What… is your quest?

TEA Party Member Arthur: To seek tax exempt status per the law.

IRS Agent: What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

TEA Party Member Arthur: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?

IRS Agent: Huh? I… I don’t know that.

[he is placed on administrative leave with full pay.]

IRS Agent: Auuuuuuuugh.

Media Wonk: How do know so much about swallows?

TEA Party Member Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you’re a TEA Party Member dealing with the IRS, you know.

[With apologies, of course, to the members of Monty Python]

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My first thought was “wow! That’s like the pot calling the kettle… um… something that would probably be misconstrued by liberals as racist.”

My second thought was “this picture needs a tagline”.
I’ll start:

“That moron wouldn’t know what to do with an intern even if she were kneeling in front of him, wearing a blue dress, and offering him a cigar!”

Your turn, in the comments, please.

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Army Doesn’t Get What It Wants For Birthday, Throws Tantrum

NOTE: contains a little adult language.

[Think you have a link that's IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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My parents shared not only an improbable love, they shared an abiding faith in the possibilities of this nation. They would give me an African name, Barack, or blessed, believing that in a tolerant America your name is no barrier to success. They imagined me going to the best schools in the land, even though they weren’t rich, because in a generous America you don’t have to be rich to achieve your potential.

BARACK OBAMA, speech at 2004 Democratic Convention

“…because in America you can spend other people’s money. By the way, YOU are the other people. Pay up, suckers!”

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With Harvey in charge, IMAO’s new tagline should be…

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“expect his speech to contain the phrase “ich bin ein ost-berliner” …and praise for the stasi”

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Yes.

Best
Instruction
Manual
Ever

Sincerely,
B. Obama

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[reference link]

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Apparently this is to address “the needs of a growing Muslim community“.

I’ve got some needs for you.

My child needs to celebrate “Christmas” with a manger and the hymns of the season. My child needs to celebrate Easter with its focus on the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. My child needs there to be prayer in the morning before school starts and before they leave for the day. My child needs prayers before contests, events, and before testing as prayer settles the mind and brings peace and harmony to the soul. My child needs an hour off daily to attend a church class that he now has to get up at 5:30 in the morning to attend (when school is in session) to help him to navigate the dangerous path laid before him by those who do not believe as he does. My child needs to not be exposed to pornography masquerading as literature, science fiction instead of scientific theory, libertine behavior disguised as health class, and abhorrent, immoral, illegal and uncivilized behavior that is on display by teachers and students alike and called “freedom of expression” while my child is told how and what and when they can “express their freedom”.

Either all religion is banned or none are.
_______________

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Biggest Liar in the World

This is one of those “audience participation” posts, and since Moon Nukers are the best participationists in the world, maybe you could pile on with this one?

[Think you have a link that's IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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Ask not 4 whom the bell tolls. It tolls 4 thee, and at a price that won't take a "toll" on your budget. Name's Miller. I'm a bell salesman.

— Jason Miller (@longwall26) June 17, 2013

"I’m gonna get a tattoo that says 'Helvetica', written in Arial. When a woman corrects me on it, I will marry her.”

— Shelby White (@ShelbyWhite) June 17, 2013

Lucius Fox tenders resignation if Obama does not destroy PRISM machine.

— Andrew Kaczynski (@BuzzFeedAndrew) June 17, 2013

"hey jay" "sup world war" "how u doin' dragon ball" – the z family reunion

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) June 17, 2013

So, to sum up, Snowden was surprised that the NSA spies on people, thinks Hong Kong is free, and that you can pet a phoenix.

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) June 17, 2013

"Shot through the heart, and you're to blame." – terrible Bon Jovi song, great Bon Jovi suicide note

— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) June 17, 2013

Is what Miss Utah said any more incoherent than the dumbest thing Chris Matthews says in any given week?

— Kyle Smith (@rkylesmith) June 17, 2013

I still don't understand what's so objectionable about having to show ID in order to vote. Won't people have to show ID to get Obamacare?

— Kevin Eder (@keder) June 17, 2013

They never call Guitar Hero by its other name: Everything Else Disappointment.

— dan guterman (@danguterman) June 17, 2013

I wonder if the coach of the opposing team on Air Bud got fired when he explained to the principal how a golden retriever outscored his team

— Rob Fee (@robfee) June 17, 2013

French people give me the crepes.

— Bad Apple (@antijokeapple) June 17, 2013

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Lady M was so rattled by a LGBT heckler at the DNC fundraiser she was addressing yesterday

that her big brain temporarily shut down, and an uncharacteristic flash of anger leapt out:

“The pool reported that Obama left the lectern toward the protestor saying that they could ‘listen to me or you can take the mic, but I’m leaving. You all decide. You have one choice.’”

In a response that presented an alternative somewhere between a conundrum and a false dilemma, Lady M created her own new logic fallacy: the “Vamoose Conundrum.” It’s “telling people they have a choice between two options, immediately followed by a declaration that negates the first one.”

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Click here to see if you made the cut.

If you did, you should probably email Keln about becoming a guest blogger there.

If you didn’t, Anonymiss has got another straight line for you to practice on.

Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.

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Later.

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In a country of 300 million people, there is a certain degree of audacity required for anybody to say, “I’m the best person to lead this country.”

BARACK OBAMA, Washington Post, Nov. 18, 2006

“Fortunately, Lincoln’s ‘all of the people, some of the time‘ thing goes double on election days. You go, Abraham!”

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I guess the idea is this should scare us into more restrictions for guns to make sure in the future people like her with childlike minds are unable to obtain a firearm, and it’s sort of a convincing argument. But insane, scared people obtaining guns to make weird political points is thankfully very rare and not something we should base policy decisions on. But if you’re heading out today and thinking of carrying, remember there are people out there like Heidi Yewman who is armed, unstable, and thinking about shooting children. Protect yourself.

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After learning of the NSA’s spying program, China…

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Sure, Obama is trying to imitate Cheney — but in the way a kid would tie a red blanket around his neck and imitate Superman. But no one is going to mistake that kid for the real Superman. And no one actually mistakes Obama for Cheney… the man who shot his friends in the face with a shotgun and we can only imagine what he did to terrorists.

So when Obama blows people up with drones and spies on everyone, we don’t think, “Here’s a terrible force we should fear!” we think “Here’s a bumbling idiot who has no idea what he’s doing we should fear!”

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