tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45913076487475686162024-09-21T15:35:59.607-04:00Today's Headlines... Smushed for Your ConvenienceUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-85871173883531890742009-03-08T11:14:00.001-04:002009-03-08T11:15:32.695-04:00<h1 class="storyheadline">How will we know when economy hits bottom? McCain reclaims his place in D.C.</h1><br /><br />These were <em>right next</em> to each other on the MSNBC home page. It's like they were daring me or something...<br /><br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29568858/">MSNBC, March 8, 2009</a> and <a href="/http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29570227/">MSNBC, March 8, 2009</a></div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-18715937799580575232009-03-06T14:27:00.005-05:002009-03-06T14:37:40.127-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Madoff guilty plea may be in works: castration is proposed as sentencing option</h1><br /><br />Hey, if this were the French Revolution, they would have cut off his head.<br /><br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29550035/">MSNBC, March 6, 2009</a> and <a href="http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9C0CE5D81F31F937A25751C0A966958260&amp;scp=5&amp;sq=castration&amp;st=cse">The New York Times, February 14, 1990</a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-84703974681918824482009-03-06T14:21:00.002-05:002009-03-06T14:38:54.042-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Is Julia Roberts' reign over? Crisis is crushing iconic U.S. companies</h1><br /><br />Julia's stock may be falling, but just wait for the sequel to <em>Erin Brockovich</em> where she searches for toxic assets.<br /><br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.newsweek.com/id/187934">Newsweek, March 6, 2009</a> and <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29541470/">MSNBC, March 6, 2009</a></div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-90915244267785936462009-03-02T16:13:00.001-05:002009-03-02T16:18:40.391-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">What to do now: 5 investing mistakes to avoid</h1><br /><ol><li>Don't Buy Stocks</li><p/><li>Don't Buy Bonds</li><p/><li>Commodities aren't looking so hot</li><p/><li>Real Estate, Ha!</li><p/><li>The Madoff Legal Fund may not yield the ROI promised in the prospectus.</li><p/></ol><br /> <br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29467436/">MSNBC, March 2, 2009</a>.</div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-87419099554169361572009-02-26T16:33:00.001-05:002009-02-26T16:34:38.667-05:00Fill in the blank in this quote from Steve Greenberg, the CEO of S-Curve Records:<br /><br />"Very simply, the Jonas Brothers are different than every other Disney musical act because the Jonas Brothers ______________________________"<br /><br />a) "were actually built from the ground up by the Disney Imagineers."<br />b) "were a band first"<br />c) "were actually aliens, just like that episode of The Middleman"<br />d) "have at least one band member that can play their instrument" <br /><br />Hmm... there's a better joke in here somewhere.<br /><br /><div class="footer"><br />Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29376532/">MSNBC Feb 26, 2009</a> </div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-68725628638798745502009-02-24T15:12:00.001-05:002009-02-24T15:13:20.841-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Retail profits pounded by spending plunge</h1><br /><br />In a related story, Lucy Van Pelt's lemonade stand and Psychology booth filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy today citing a lack of consumer spending. Last minute attempts to secure TARP money for the stand failed when Ms. Van Pelt called the federal bank representative a "Blockhead".<br /><br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29368439/">MSNBC Feb 24, 2009</a>.</div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-50553477014947662742009-02-24T13:51:00.001-05:002009-02-24T13:52:50.826-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Fed chief: U.S. suffering ‘severe contraction’, gives birth to octuplets </h1><br /><br />If this is going to be the economy, I think I speak for all America, when I say, "to hell with natural childbirth, we'd like the drugs now"<br /><br /><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29363747/">MSNBC: Feb 24, 2009</a> and <a href="http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/28864195/">Today, January 27, 2009</a>, among others.</div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-78789303842655537732009-02-24T10:54:00.007-05:002009-02-24T11:05:30.300-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">NASA Satellite Fails to Reach Orbit: It’s at the Pawnshop</h1><br /><br />You just know NASA is going to blow it all at the race track...<br /><br /><div class="source"><br />Source: <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/25/science/space/25satellite.html?hp">New York Times, February 24, 2009</a> and <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/24/arts/design/24artloans.html?hp">New York Times, February 23, 2009</a><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-13828321757736238902009-02-21T10:28:00.001-05:002009-02-21T10:28:21.157-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Socks, former Clinton cat, put to sleep; Meek ending for mighty unit that gutted AIG</h1><br /><br />I can't wait to see the impending "documentaries" about how Socks was murdered to spare the Clintons political embarrassment...<br /><br /><div class="footer"><br />Source: <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/02/20/socks.obit/index.html">CNN.com Feb 20, 2009</a> and <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29311015/">MSNBC, Feb 21 2009</a><br /></div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-73775563745796891202009-02-20T17:57:00.005-05:002009-02-20T18:12:54.579-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Ann Coulter vs. Joy Behar with a crossbow</h1>Don't worry about Ann--the arrows will be harmlessly sucked into the massive vacuum that exists where real humans have a soul.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Source: <a href="http://watching-tv.ew.com/2009/02/ann-coulter-joy.html">Entertainment Weekly, February 20, 2009</a> and <a href="http://scitech.blogs.cnn.com/2009/02/19/shooting-endangered-whales-with-a-crossbow/">CNN, February 19, 2009</a></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-8029131250742845542009-02-20T10:26:00.002-05:002009-02-20T18:05:00.981-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Girl Scout cookie sales crumbling: Robbing banks no longer just for guys</h1><br /><br />"Give me all the money in the safe. I have a Thin Mint, and I'm not afraid to use it."<br /><br /><div class="footer"><br />Source: <a href="http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2009-02-19-girlscoutcookies_N.htm?csp=DailyBriefing">USA Today, Feb 19, 2009</a> and <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/02/20/women.bank.robbers/index.html">CNN.com Feb 20, 2009</a><br /></div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-1919164451604761602009-02-19T23:15:00.004-05:002009-02-20T18:05:43.635-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">GOP governors consider rejecting stimulus money; Shark attacks cited</h1><br />Frankly, "Shark attacks cited" works pretty well at the end of just about any headline. <br /><br />Try it:<br />"Dewey Defeats Truman; Shark Attacks Cited"<br />"Ford To City: Drop Dead; Shark Attacks Cited"<br /><br /><div class="footer"><br />Source: <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29283441/">MSNBC, Feb 19, 2009</a> and <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29279120/">MSNBC, Feb 19, 2009</a><br /></div>Noel Rappinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07196693221217343089noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4591307648747568616.post-34143224506794821732009-02-19T18:17:00.003-05:002009-02-20T18:06:35.518-05:00<h1 class="storyheadline">Brian Dennehy takes fall, Dow stumbles to 6-year low</h1><div class="footer">Source: <a href="http://leisureblogs.chicagotribune.com/the_theater_loop/2009/02/brian-dennehy-takes-fall-at-goodman-goes-on-with-show.html">Chicago Tribune, February 18, 2009</a> and <a href="http://money.cnn.com/2009/02/19/markets/markets_newyork/index.htm">CNN, February 19, 2009</a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0