The first state is Shitter and is for the announcement of bodily functions (even miscarriages). Here you can boast of notable bowel movements (of unusual weight, shape, or size), urination lasting for more than one minute and five seconds and anything else that has been known to leak or propel itself out of the body. I know what you’re thinking and the answer is, yes. Vomiting is included. As well as menstruation. But let’s not get mesmerized by volume, weight, and duration. Don’t forget color. If something is normally a certain color or hue and comes out totally off color, you’ll need an outlet for sharing this news. Say your urine is normally a boring pale yellow but one day welcomes you with a day-brightening lime green Gatorade color, you’ll need to share this with the world and post it on Shitter. Mind you, when it clears up, no one cares about that. This is only for if you continue to piss a plutonium based discharge.

Shitter also encompasses other aspects of humanity. Other things more than suitable to be listed on Shitter are: any information regarding a reality TV show, any information concerning Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, news of a United States financial institution, anything Barrack Obama says (or does). Speaking of Barry we might as well include anything that hyena Oprah Winfrey says, and last but not least something like hot tips about Jennifer Aniston, and the co star she’s doing from her latest film. Unless of course it’s a female co star, then it should be listed on Twatter and not Shitter. IF she doesn’t “go all the way” with a woman, then it’s listed on just Titter and not Twatter.

The other states and examples of the information they should contain are as follows (in no particular order):

Bitter: An outlet for the gay community, women’s movements (but not bowel), Democrats, any of my ex-girlfriends, fans of the hit show The View and cast members of said hit show.

Bit ‘er: If you have a woman into rough sex or you are a woman into rough sex.

Critter: Pest control, small penises, scary looking children.

Clitter: for women who have an unusually large erogenous zone at the top of the vagina. Now don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying that you think it’s bigger than more or a little plump. I’m saying that if it looks like she has a pink baby carrot between her legs, we’ll need to know and on Clitter is where we’ll look.

Did ‘er: a place to list the names of all the girls you’ve banged and for West Virginian males to chat about their sisters, daughters, and mothers. Also, for Bill Clinton to list information on his current roomy Jewish intern.

Fitter: Anyone who weighs less than Kirstie Alley. 93% percent of NFL players qualify to use this service.

Flitter: a site for gay men.

Git ‘er: for West Virginian males with stubborn sisters, daughters, and mothers.

Hitter: The Violent Sports Talk Network. Messages posted about soccer are punishable by death.

Itter: Here is a place for the linguistically challenged who cannot properly pronounce a B through Z plus the –itter.

Jitter: for guys who think they cum an exorbitant amount.

Kid ‘er: a place to list diplomatic responses to questions she asks like: Do I look fat in this dress? Is my sister hotter than me? If you weren’t dating me would you do my friends?

Litter: Information on people we should throw away. Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, Kanye West, Chris Brown, Jon and Kate from “Jon and Kate Plus Eight”… in fact we could probably get rid of three of those kids and no one would care. Then they’ll probably launch the new hit show “And Then There Were Five” so the dipshits who watched the original show would have something to look forward to. With that in mind, let’s throw the eight out as well.

Mit ‘er: a place for guys in the South to state where they hooked up with their current significant other: “I mit ‘er at the Chuck and Puke on Route 11.”

Nitter: for those whose balls are made of yarn.

Pitter: birth announcements, as in pitter patter (of little feet).

Quitter: for the pussies who stopped drinking and/or smoking because their doctors told them it was no good for them and/or their wives or husbands wanted them to stop.

Sitter: a place for guys to share fantasies about the college girl who watches their kids. If a woman has such fantasies, please use Twatter.

Spitter: Now, one might think that those who choose NOT to finish a certain job (hint: the wind does this) would be listed in Quitter. But I don’t think so. The job IS complete but the doer of the action (aka the subject of the sentence) chooses to hock out the creamy prize like it’s a loogie during flu season.

Don’t confuse this with those women who complain: “I’m not putting that in my mouth. You PEE from it!” Yes, sue me. I pee from it. But you pee from your lovely little pink Venus Fly Trap too but yet I still find the courage to lick it like the wallpaper at Willy Wonka’s Chocolate factory. Don’t I? Yes. I’m asking you to sing karaoke with a flesh microphone and you’re asking me to stick my face into a large piping hot pepperoni pizza. But don’t get me started on this.

Vitter: the Arnold Schwarzenegger “Fitter” board

Yidder: Jews only. Which is to say everyone who works in the entertainment and or publishing industry… you’re free to post here.

Zitter: self explanatory, for those with a bad complexion and also the Arnold Schwarzenegger “Sitter” board.

Racist: for all white people. No buts and no excuses. If you are white, you’re guilty as charged. You’re a racist. Get used to it.

My first Dan Brown experience was The Da Vinci Code.  I fell into the hype, and the book was highly suggested by a buddy.  I gave it a whirl, as much for the controversy that I was starting to hear, as well as the subject matter itself.  Religious debates aside, I really enjoyed the book.

Brown obviously had done a lot of research and combined volumes of fact, legend, speculation, ancient mysteries, Christian doctrine, symbology and secret societies and wrapped it into a story.  At times I felt like I should have been taking notes for future reference (cue the school days shudders) because, as the characters in the book worked through their predicaments, the interpretations mixed with facts of ancient mysteries were coming at me in rapid fire.  The characters and story were definitely good enough to keep me riveted, and I would spend hours on the computer Googling many items from the book.

Six long years later for Dan Brown fans and his next book is published, The Lost Symbol.  I just finished it.

If you take my paragraph above (starting with “Brown obviously had done…”), add in “science” to the first sentence, then substitute “was there” for “were definitely good enough to keep me riveted” in the last, then you have The Lost Symbol.

The story that everything else was wrapped around was very weak.  I have read all five of Dan Brown’s novels, and my one major critical point in his writing style is that he misleads the reader.  He writes them in the narrative style, injecting the character’s thoughts so the reader can “see” more of the character and what is going on as they decipher the mysteries.  Countless times in his novels, as a conversation is happening, a revelation is discovered, or a mystery is unlocked, Brown cuts off the conversation and switches scenes.  The character has that “AHA!!” moment that reveals a major plot piece.  Brown  then makes the reader wait pages, sometimes chapters, before unveiling what that revelation was… yet we follow the character through on their harrowing adventure not understanding WHY they are trying to frantically get to point B on the map, but the character knows.  That makes no sense to me, and I found it irritating to me at times in this book.  It would be like dining with my wife at a restaurant and having a phone call about something we were talking about.  Then I would stand suddenly, grab her hand, rush out to the car and drive for 35 minutes to get home, all the while not telling her why.  Believe me, if life happened as Brown writes, there might be a lot more unexpected revelations, but there also would be a lot more divorces and throats being punched.  Brown has to have faith in his readers that we would be just as anxious as the characters, and that a fake cliff hanger is not needed.  The story and the craft of good storytelling should be strong enough so as not to throw in an unseen twist just for the sake of an unseen twist.  It is cheap.  If that twist is revealed to the reader early on, but the characters are kept in the dark, a good narrative should accomplish the same goal.  The twist revealed here actually left me feeling cheated, and I was distracted for many pages as I kept thinking back to earlier in the book… and how Brown misled.

A number of elements of this story are similar to those in Da Vinci.  The protagonist, Robert Langdon, returns for his third novel (he was in Angels & Demons and The Da Vinci Code), there is a strong, intelligent female character that is involved in the adventure side-by-side with Langdon, there is an uber-creepy villain (this one, also bald, is tattooed over his whole body, instead of an albino monk), and the supporting characters all have their own agenda where you try to figure out who to trust.

The meat of this novel is again in the mysteries, symbology and the interpretations of both. Brown does a better job in instructing the reader on opening the mind and changing our perception of the world we live in, than delivering characters that you care what fate awaits. Robert Langdon’s skepticism through the whole book becomes so annoying  that you wonder if Brown even remembers that this is the third novel he wrote him into.  Personally, if I were in Langdon’s shoes and encountered the events of Rome (Angels & Demons) then Paris (The Da Vinci Code) and experienced the puzzles that were “solved” in both, my skepticism would be long gone.  Hell, I’d be looking at my  water bottle and wondering what Poland Spring is really trying to tell the world.

Overall, I really enjoyed the book. It doesn’t sound like it, but I did.  I enjoyed it for the science (noetic science plays a part), and the huge amount of factual trivia regarding Washington D.C., our Founding Fathers, the Freemasons, and some of the “secrets in plain view” in buildings in Washington.  I had many “that’s cool!” moments as I read some of these facts as the characters unraveled the puzzles before them.  I want to go back to Washington and see some of them for myself now.  You’ll never guess what fictional character has a sculpture on a cathedral in Washington!  I can’t imagine what else Brown had uncovered that didn’t even make it into the book.  Centuries of mysticism, beliefs, and persecution shaped how humankind has evolved thinking and has left the true meanings of original works shrouded in symbology and puzzles.

The main focus of this novel is perspective.  Brown impressively created the puzzles and interpretations about how objects, thoughts, words, spirituality, the human mind, and legends all can change monumentally if the perspective is changed.  Allegory is more of a character here than the actual characters, and that is welcome.  He avoids the heavy-handed religious overtones, and focuses on spirituality instead of the denominational aspects.  No true secrets were revealed in the pages, but Brown leaves the reader wondering “What if it were true?” again. To me, this makes The Lost Symbol a worthwhile read.  It allows us to explore what we are now, and what our forefathers had in mind when they built America, what the ancient scientists and philosophers studied before modern technology, and what today’s technology will really allow us to uncover.

1. Don’t Believe Everything You Read
What this means is don’t believe everything you read about how the adopting agency lists the dog.  Spayed/neutered? Check. House-trained? Check. Shots up to date and de-wormed? Check.
Reality? Check please!!  Turns out that “copy and paste” errors affect the website author just as it does the rest of us.

2. Get To Know Your Carpet
Learn and inspect every inch of your carpeting about every 22 minutes.  About half of my first floor in my house is carpeting, the other half being flooring of some kind (hardwood, tile or vinyl).  The entire second floor is carpeted.  Puppies seem to appreciate carpeting in the same way that theylike dropping their asses on grass outside.  It must be the feeling between their toes.

3. Get Up and Personal With Your Dog’s Poop
Poop, crap, excrement, shit, number two, Crohnsicles, doo-doo… no matter what you call it, if your Vet says to keep an eye on it, you better.  Much like our own brown deposits tell us volumes about our health, eating habits and excessive drinking, the Baby Ruth’s that these tiny beasts drop sometimes contain living creatures of their own.

4. Your Vet Is Your Friend
By “friend” I mean that friend that is always asking you for lots of money, and shows you no compassion for the journey you have now decided to undertake.  The only good thing is they are probably the only people in the world that you can hand a bag of crap to without any repercussions.  I add to this tiny pleasure of mine by bringing in a good eight pounds of the steamers when they only require about an ounce.

5.  Establish Dominance
Puppies aren’t very bright.  Much like their bladders, they don’t seem to have large brains.  She makes up for brain power by exerting pure energy, mostly at inopportune times.  Our old dog just wants to be and live out his remaining time in peace.  He, much like me, just wants to lay around and be left alone.  Our puppy has other, very playful, thoughts.  She nips and jumps, and his irritation has given way to growling, to baring teeth, to vicious barking… we fear what’s next.  He can snap her scrawny neck quick, but she doesn’t seem to recognize that possibility.  She does act submissive, but unfortunately our old guy is blind, all he knows is that she’s nearby and annoying as hell.  With me, on the other hand, she bites my hands, arms, ankles and calves.  Trust me, I will always be on guard when exiting the shower.  I have to flip her on her back and hold her there while trying to stare into her eyes to establish my dominance… all the while she is making sounds like “The Tiny Warrior” from Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls.

6. It’s Worth It
For the expected “awwwww” moment, I have to say it was all worth it.  It is one of the most rewarding things to know that you saved this loving and needy creature from a possible horrible fate, either by the cruel and heartless acts by those out for their own sick enjoyment, or by the financial shortcomings of the organizations trying to save the animals.  We adopted our first dog almost twelve years ago, and found out that he would have been put down the following day if he wasn’t adopted on that day.  Our newest pup was rescued “from a very bad situation” down in Virginia.

Welcome to our family, little girl.

Anyway, my son’s last track practice of the week was at 5:15 that day and when I got home I found out that it was coaches/parents vs. the kids. I was pretty pumped – here was my chance to show my kid that his old man still had the jets. I took him to practice and was ready to run. When I got there I found out there was a shortage of parents so I had to double up and run two legs of a 4×100m relay. Just to remind you all, 100m = about 109 yards. That’s longer than a football field. So I sprinted 218 yards in about a 3 min span. That’s a greater distance than I have sprinted in about the last 15 years combined.

So I am the starter in the first leg and I take off like a bat out of hell – just destroyed the 7th grade girl in the lane next to me by at least 30 yards. I felt pretty good – the old man still had the jets. So I hand off the baton with my team well in first place and am pretty winded but not too horrible. Then I go to get into position to run leg #2. I start off pretty good but about half way through the legs start to get a bit rubbery – I still beat the little snot next to me, but not by as much.

Now I’m pretty winded and need to catch my breath. It takes a little while and I do get my breath back, but something just isn’t right. I really didn’t feel well at all. I tried to walk it off and chatted with some other parents, but I just felt like crap. I decided that maybe it would help if I walked to the car and sat with the AC on for a few minutes. I think deep down, I was a like one of those wounded animals that just needs to find a place to crawl off and die – some place secure and away from the all of the other animals. Anyway, after 5-10 minutes in the car, I become honest with myself and admit that I really just need to puke – that lasagna was not sitting right at all. So I got out of the Santa Fe and walked around to the back of it, out of view of everyone else, and just spewed like Vesuvius. Chucks of beef lasagna everywhere, including stuck in my nose. I walked around to go back in the car and clean myself up when another wave hit and I spewed again. This time was worse, not only because  I could have been spotted, but because when I opened the door, my friggin ice scraper fell out of the door holder and right into ground zero. Dammit!!! Anyway, I found some old Wendy’s napkins (all sprinters consist on Wendy’s) and cleaned myself up and drank some water.

Suddenly, I felt 100% better – as if I had been healed by the touch of God. After a thorough check that I had no incriminating spew on my body or clothes, I went back down to practice and had a nice rest of the day. Of course when practice was over, I had to fess up to the boy as there were those large vomit lakes by the car. He had a good laugh – I let him enjoy his laugh and didn’t mention to him until we got home that that he was sitting on the very Wendy’s napkins I used to clean myself off. The best laugh is the last laugh.

Several of the boy’s friends did tell me how great I looked running – probably just being nice but my ego is taking them at their word. When we got home, I started hitting  my son with the “Your old man’s still got the speed” line to which he replied “To go along with a lot of vomit”. He did finally give me a nice backhanded compliment of “Well, you certainly are fast for someone who looks like you. Fast enough to beat a 7th grade girl. Good job, Dad”. I think I made my point with him – case dismissed.

So although the cost was high – a $5 lunch special I will never get back – I was able to defend the pride of Dads everywhere. And that, my friends, is priceless. Well, I guess the price was actually $5, but who’s counting.

CollegeHumor puts together something that has not been discussed in the geek world: the idea that the Death Star destruction by a small Jedi squad was maybe a little, too easy.  Well maybe in back alleys, private homes and sci-fi conventions, but not many other places.  The truth is out there somewhere, and if you pay attention, maybe you too can decide what is truth, and what is fabricated by those completely out of touch with reality and should do something meaningful with their lives. Clear you mind, just as the “truthers” have done.

Now, one would not be wrong to argue that the real story here is the fact that I was actually in a gym. Normally I would agree, but this is a special story – a story about how far we have come in America. And it’s a story about America’s redemption and how we have come to finally embrace our past.

You see, not all that long ago, anyone caught wearing a Star Trek uniform within a hundred yards of a gym would find themselves walking home with an Atomic Wedgie.  The irony here is that at one point in time, America itself was the little nerd – at least on a global sense. The British with their powder wigs, ruffle shirts, and big buckle shoes were the cool guys. They got off on pushing us around and making fun of our coonskin caps and silly accents. In fact, most people don’t realize that the movie “Revenge of the Nerds” is actually an allegorical recounting of the American Revolution. The Nerds represent the Americans with the Alpha Betas as the British, the Omega Mu’s as the Hessians and Lamar as the French. And just like in the movie, America stood up to the big bully British and took over the Greek Council. But unlike the movie, we didn’t embrace ourselves as nerds. We were embarrassed and ashamed so we bulked ourselves up, got addicted to processed meats, and became the world’s big man on campus.

But that has started to change. Just as we have made progress in terms of sexism, racism, and a wide range of other hang-ups, we have also made progress in the acceptance of our Nerdism. The evidence of this change can be seen everywhere around us. On television  the SyFy Channel  blares out Dr. Who and Battlestar Galactica 24 hours a day. And even old stodgy CBS has a series called “The Big Bang Theory” that centers on the lives and dreams of a group of nerds. (This show truly is the “Will & Grace” of the nerd revolution.) At the movies we have sequel after sequel of Harry Potter while the new Star Trek movie grossed almost 400 million dollars.  Finally, if you need more proof – William Shatner has become some type of neo-hipster.

So, all of this brings me back to that brave guy at the gym in the Star Trek shirt. There he was, lifting weights and sporting a healthy cardiovascular system, and most importantly, not being judged. As my attention span waned yet again, and I went back to watching “The Verminators” tangle with some angry honeybees, I felt a renewed sense of pride in being an American. Sure, times may be tough now, but it’s going to be alright. Live Long and Prosper America.

A few weeks ago, I was contacted about the upcoming movie, Big Fan, by those behind the marketing.  They wanted to know if we were interested in a screening of the film, as well as an interview with Writer / Director Robert Siegel.  Mr. Siegel is the acclaimed writer behind 2008’s The Wrestler.  Of course I responded positively, I’m not a fool, and within a couple weeks I received a very nondescript DVD in the mail.

With actor / comedian Patton Oswalt as the star of the movie, as well as the vague description of the movie (paraphrasing: Paul is a huge New York Giants fan, who runs into his hero, a superstar Giants linebacker, then things don’t go as planned), I expected this to be a comedy.  The trailer quickly stifled that suspicion as we see Paul get a beatdown from his hero, the fictional player Quantrell Bishop.

As I unfortunately have not seen The Wrestler yet, I was not familiar with Mr. Siegel’s writing, and this was his directorial debut.  I had no expectations going into this movie.

The pacing of the movie is slow, pretty much matching the life of the main character Paul Aufiero (Patton Oswalt).  Paul lives with his mother (Marcia Jean Kurtz), works as a fee-taker at a parking garage, has one friend, Sal (played by Kevin Corrigan), and doesn’t enjoy the company of the rest of his family.  Paul’s only passion, at least what we see, is his love of the New York Giants.  His small bedroom is a shrine to the Giants, complete with NFL-branded sheets, and he religiously watches every game.  He is a regular caller, “Paul from Staten Island”, to the local sports talk radio station, and he scripts what he wants to say in those 20 or so on-air seconds for hours in his notepad.  Those calls are robust and filled with fandom, and the radio show loves it.  He and Sal go to each Giants home game, tailgate with the masses, but with no tickets, don’t go in, instead spending the time in the parking lot.  They watch the game on a TV rigged to the car battery, just to be close to where it’s happening and be with other fans.
Paul’s relationships are only superficial.  His mother irritates him, and she is obviously not amused by his “lack of a life,” but he lives with her, so he’s stuck.  His brother Jeff is one of the ambulance-chaser lawyers ready to sue everyone.  We are even treated to the debut of a badly-acted, badly-scripted TV commercial Jeff had made that you and I have all seen on our small screens during the day, or late at night.  From what we are shown, Paul’s friendship with Sal consists of only one thing, the Giants.  They don’t seem to do anything else, and if they do, the conversation only revolves around the Giants.  Sal idolizes Paul’s drive to call in to the nighttime Sports Dogg show (voiced by Scott Ferrall), and praises Paul for hearing him on the radio and his insight.

There are two catalyst players in Paul’s life.  The first is Giants linebacker Quantrell Bishop (played by newcomer Jonathan Hamm) and the other is Sports Dogg caller, and Paul’s on-air nemesis, “Philadelphia Phil”, played by Michael Rappaport.  Philadelphia Phil is a Philly-based Eagles fan, and Giants-hater.  Phil enjoys talking smack and even venturing into the New York airwaves by calling in to the Sports Dogg and making fun of the Giants team and fans, predicting the inevitable Giants downfall, and proclaiming Eagles dominance.  Phil is a believable character, and I know fans that taunt other teams’ fans by joining in on their online forums and sports talk shows.  Phil can be any hardcore sports fan.

Paul’s life changes forever when he and Sal are out grabbing a couple of slices of pizza one night and they see Bishop getting gas in his SUV right there in Staten Island.  Seeing their hero in the flesh, they don’t think twice about following his truck just to see what he’s up to.  Eventually the truck stops in a seedy neighborhood, yet Paul and Sal are naive enough to not realize that one of Bishop’s entourage is involved in buying drugs.  The innocent stalking eventually winds up at a gentleman’s club.  Paul and Sal also go in, and are so awestruck to see Bishop across the room, and trying to figure out how to introduce themselves, they both refuse a dance from one of the performers, with Sal even saying, “I’m on a job” before dismissing her.  No spoilers here, because it can be seen in the trailer, but they eventually work up their courage to approach Bishop, where they let it be known that they followed him from Staten Island.  A coked-up Bishop then beats Paul badly, putting him in the hospital where he wakes up three days later.

The rest of the movie deals with Paul’s misguided idolization of Bishop, who nearly killed him, and the affect on the Giants team, as they lose game after game because of Bishop’s suspension and the distraction to the team.  We see Paul blame almost everyone around him, including himself, for what is happening to the team, yet not the person truly responsible for what has happened, Bishop.  Paul remains an anonymous victim to the fans, and he feigns amnesia so he cannot give testimony to the investigating detective on the case.  Paul’s whole life has collapsed, as the police detective doesn’t believe him, his family is irritated with him, his hero knocked falls from his pedestal, and his team is losing it’s Division lead.   After weeks, and several Giants losses, the case is dropped against Bishop.  Paul’s hell seems to be coming to an end, until he discovers that his brother files a multi-million dollar lawsuit against Bishop, on Paul’s behalf.  Philadelphia Phil, through some simple online forum checking, discovers Paul’s last name, and outs him on the Sports Dogg.  Paul’s anonymous, almost lethargic, life has now gone.

The movie’s climax leads down the NJ Turnpike to Philadelphia, and we see Philadelphia Phil for the first time at the bar where he told Paul on the Sports Dogg where he would be for the big Giants-Eagles game, if Paul wanted to “leave the dark side, and join up with Eagles Nation.”

We see in this movie how the misguided uber-fan places aside the life of ambition and family, and migrates to anything having to do with his one passion.  His life is happy, as the director himself points out in our interview on EaglesFanCast, but that happiness rests solely on the success of his team.  The beatdown does nothing to shake that devotion, and instead forces Paul to lose sight of what really matters in his life.

Big Fan is definitely a movie to see if you are any sports fan, let alone a football fan.  Just about any fan can say they know of someone that takes the success of their team just a little too seriously. This is a window into the person that piles everything on their team, all of their love, their adoration, their respect… unfailingly.  Robert Siegel has penned another great movie, and I definitely recommend people seek it out.

I used to own a sports memorabilia store, and I purchased authenticated, signed merchandise on Ebay for resale in the store. I had a good idea what things wholesaled for and knew a good deal when I saw one. One time, I saw a deal on an Emmitt Smith signed mini helmet that was too good to be true. The auction was ending in less than 30 minutes and the item was going for well below what others of the same quality and authentication were. What was wrong with this one that turned people off? What was I missing? I was missing my mistake and more importantly, the mistake of the person who listed the item.

When I searched for the item I typed in “Emmit” and not the proper spelling of his name, “Emmitt.” This misspelling is what kept everyone who knew how to spell his name correctly or didn’t commit a typo while searching from seeing this auction, hence, the good deal. I won the auction and paid $75 less than what I was willing to pay for the item. Good deal. Not bad for a so-called mistake on my part. Did I learn from it? You’re damn right I did.

I went on to pay significantly less for: a Squire Stratocaster guitar (proper spelling: Squier) and a Derek Jeeter signed baseball (Jeter). I got a very nice deal on a Wayne Gretzkee (Gretzky) signed 8×10. All because I took advantage of others’ mistakes.

So, the next time you’re hunting for your next treasure, type in what might be a common misspelling and see if you can get a good deal. They are to be had. If you are listing an item, use the flipside of this tip. In the listing, put common misspellings in so that everyone finds the listing and not just those who spell the name correctly. Don’t list: an Emmitt Smith signed mini helmet. List instead: an Emmitt Emmit Smith signed mini helmet.

So as I sit here, the proud owner of several dogs (most have been rescues) over the course of my life, what am I to do?  I got my first dog at age 3 so I’ve been a dog fan longer than an Eagle fan, but I do love football an awful lot…

I’m not against Vick playing for another NFL team – let the Cowgirls have him, it’ll give me that much more reason to hate them.  Let Vick play, just not here,  just not for my team.

Based on these factors, I made a rash decision last week to renounce my fanhood until Mike Vick is no longer on the team.
I admit, I’ve wavered,  I kinda still want to see them do well.   I like #5, DeSean, B-West and most of the Birds and I will miss them this year (next?).  But as someone pointed out on EaglesFanCast, in the comments of the latest post, it’s the name on the front of the jersey we should root for not those on the back.

Thanks for solidifying my resolve – the name on the front of the jersey consistently puts enough talent out there to win, just not win it all.  The name on the front of the jersey let all-time Eagle Brian Dawkins walk away.  The name on the front of the jersey was supposed to stand for character, not the gutter.

I cannot root for an organization that claims to be the gold standard of Professional Football yet owes the city it plays in millions of dollars while libraries are closing, where the coach offers fans no explanations even after we know the truth because he has control issues, where they let a future Hall Of Famer walk away without even a real shot at re-signing, where the blowhard President Joe Banner proclaims to have the most talented roster in football then goes and signs the most notorious player available to add more talent.

What would it take for you to renounce your fanship (or at least put it on hold)?  Michael Vick apparently was my tipping point.  As far I am concerned, while Senor Mexico is in town I will consider myself an Eagles fan in exile.

I don’t expect you to agree, this is a personal choice  about a personal topic, just judge me fairly.  Let me know what you think.

By the way, here is some information on dog fighting on the Humane Society’s site for you to read.