I finally finished my first knitting project! Only a million days after I started it… :P It’s a lap blanket to use in my office during winter. I used a scarf pattern but made it fatter and shorter. I wanted it to be able to cover my lap but not be so long that it gets tangled under my chair wheels. I think it will work out perfectly. Yay!

It’s been a month since I started over with all my goals and getting my life back on track and it’s been going pretty well. There have been a few ups and downs over the getting adjusted period, but I think things are settling into a good groove now.

Damn Allergies: I finally have a routine for prepping my home and office for all my new allergies and that seems to be going well. No sinus infections or waking up with my eyes swollen shut yet, so that is great!

The Diet: I’ve been trying all sorts of new recipes to get back on track with my diet and stop with the ice cream and mac and cheese comfort binge sessions. I’ve gone back to measuring foods and planning all my meals out. Plus, I’ve loaded my home and office with healthy snacks to help keep me from eating bad crap in a pinch.

Some of the ideas for what snacks to include I got from listening to Jillian Michael’s podcast. She mentioned freeze-dried fruit, which isn’t something I’d ever tried before. So I bought a few packets and gave it a try. It’s so yummy! Apple cinnamon is my favorite, but I also like pear, regular apple, pineapple, and strawberry banana. I now keep packets of a variety of flavors at home and at work.

She also mentioned Justin’s nut butters. I wasn’t all that familiar with them, but I love peanut butter, so I had to check them out. Usually I have Trader Joe’s peanut butter because they sell one that has no sugar in it. It’s just peanuts. The problem is that it has to be refrigerated and I don’t really have that as an option at work. My floor has fridges that are smaller than what I had in my dorm room in college. Scary! Anyway, what I found is that Justin’s doesn’t have to be refrigerated and the almond butter and peanut butter are sugar free. And that’s excellent news for me! Plus, there is a maple almond butter that I can have. It has maple sugar in it, but I’m allowed to have that one. Oh, and by the way, they are all really yummy, in case you were wondering. Now I keep a jar of each of these flavors in my desk, plus a ton of Schar table crackers. I also like that there are small packets available for on the go, which is perfect for having some protein on hand on a long hike or road trip.

Besides those snack options, I have some little packets of raw almonds that are good for a quick protein hit too.

On to Running:

I’m also easing back into getting on track with a workout routine. It’s been a hard adjustment because of the having to switch my running schedule around. My doctor doesn’t want me running before 11am because of my tree and ragweed allergy. I’ve been trying to run after work but it feels weird. I’m more tired and it’s hotter out. So it’s slow going. I have mostly been running 2 miles at a pop, though last weekend I ran 3. I’d like to get it up to 4 or 5 for regular runs, then longer on the weekend.

I love morning runs so much that I’m seriously considering getting one of these masks to try out:

It has a Vader/mutant quality to it that I think I could work with. My biggest problem is that I might feel like I’m suffocating wearing it and as someone who has had asthma attacks in the past, this is not a very calming feeling for me. So, not sure.

I’m also adding in some cross training. Last week I took a strength class that was fun and brutal all at the same time. These trainers mean business! My triceps were so sore for the next 2 days that I wanted to scream. Eating and dressing myself became painful things to do. Picking up my cat nearly killed me. Heh. But, the pain will fade (I hope) and I’ll get stronger. I plan on a taking a lot more of these classes and running, running, and more running. Well, until I pass out and need to rest.

On another note, the place where I sling around a lacrosse ball is finally open again! It was closed down for renovations for a year. An entire year!

Happy dance time!

So, that’s that. Guess we’ll see how well it goes in a few weeks maybe…when I can pick my arms up long enough to type again. :P

This has fast become a favorite snack of mine. It’s frozen banana ice cream. And it’s so damn yummy! I followed a recipe for it off theKitchn. It’s frozen banana blended together and that’s it. I added a spoonful of Trader Joe’s peanut butter to mine. Mmm.

I really didn’t believe it would become so creamy. And I’ll admit that I got a bit frustrated with the constant need to stop the blender to shove the banana closer to the blade. But then something magical happened and it turned into an ice cream consistency. Amazing! Between this and the snickerdoodle ice cream I made a few weeks ago, I no longer miss store bought ice cream. And that right there is one awesome thing indeed. It’s helping curb my ice cream as a comfort food cravings as well as the sugar cravings. Now if only I could find a healthier way to handle my insane cheese cravings and I’d be rocking this back on a diet thing. :)

Most every night when I got to sleep, Ruki eventually makes her way to the couch. Some nights, when I get up to refill my drink, she steals my spot, pretending she’s been there all along. And I’m the idiot for still being awake. Tonight though, she stole my spot, then watched me warily as I approached the couch. Her expression amused me, so I took a pic. You may not be able to tell, but she’s sitting dead center. And it’s only a loveseat, so that doesn’t leave much room for me. We can share if she’d only scooch over. No such luck. :P

I tried out another recipe from Gluten-Free Girl Every Day today. I’m beginning to think I’m on a quest to try to make every single recipe in this book! Anyway, today I made zucchini noodles with spinach pesto, feta, and sunflower seeds. At first it was a little weird tasting to me, but then I realized it was because I’d never had cold zucchini noodles before. I’m not sure why my subconscious expected them to taste warm. It’s not like I heated them. :P Heh. Anyway, it’s pretty good. I think the sunflower seeds are my favorite part to this dish. For next time, I’d like to find a way to peel the zucchini into more slender strips. And maybe I’d use a little less lemon juice next time too. And then I think it would be perfect for me. :)

Next up, I’ll be trying out the recipe for African yellow rice with black-eyed peas. The peas are already soaking. Can’t wait!

Today on Wired, I read about the 23-ton, 5.3 million brick x-wing that was on display in Times Square. So, of course I had to take a long route home from work to check it out! It was even more awesome that I could have imagined!

It was big enough to stand under to hide from the rain. Here’s a pic taken while hiding under a wing:

Here’s a pic looking up at a wing:

I remembered their being rubber bands on the back when I built the small version of it. It was interesting to see how they were able to keep the rubber band piece of it by making them out of many, many bricks:

And let’s not forget the characters!

Yay! My Batgirl headband and Catwoman bracelet arrived! I stumbled upon Fangirls‘ booth at NYCC one year and got a Catwoman headband and Batgirl lunchbox then. But I’d always wanted that Batgirl headband and finally decided to get one custom made by them. And well, saw the Catwoman bracelet and couldn’t resist that one either.  They are both awesome! Someday I’ll have to get something made with Harley Quinn on it. Eventually…

I tried out another new recipe today. It’s called Raw Summer Mueseli and it’s so good! I love berries so I can see this being a great breakfast for me all summer! This is another recipe from Simply Gluten Free Magazine (the other being the ice cream I made yesterday).

Starting to think I’m gonna need to subscribe to this magazine….

I made my own ice cream! It’s the first time I ever tried and it’s very yummy. :)

The biggest problem with sticking to my no sugar diet is missing the ice cream. It’s my go to comfort food. And when I’m feeling down, I lose all control where ice cream is concerned. So, I decided to better help me stay on my diet, I’d try making my own without the sugar. I found the recipe for a snickerdoodle ice cream in Simply Gluten Free Magazine that’s dairy free and sugar free. The sweetened part of the flavor comes from honey and chopped dates. Mmm. I think going sugar free on the ice cream is gonna work out just fine. Maybe I can find even healthier recipes for it too….

I’ve tried out four recipes so far and I really like all of them! Last week I made chili with butternut squash, black beans, and kale for my lunches. The only thing I changed in this recipe was that I skipped the salt and pepper. It made for a very hearty lunch:

For my dinner, I made roasted chicken salad with apples, golden raisins, and tarragon. I made a couple changes to this recipe. I went with grilled chicken breasts instead of roasted chicken from legs and thighs. I made that change because I bought a grill pan and wanted to test it out for the first time. I skipped the salt and pepper since I tend to avoid salt, and well, I forget to add pepper when it’s listed with salt in the recipe. It’s a thing. Also, I halved the dressing because it ended up being too much for me. I think I could even get away with making 1/3 of the amount next time. When I plated it, I tossed on some blueberries and grapes because they were in the fridge and I figured, why not? I liked the flavor they added to it.

This weekend I made sweet potato-chorizo hash with a fried egg on top. Okay, well, it’s an egg, not exactly a fried egg. I got tired of waiting for it to cook (I was really hungry) and just flipped it over. It was still a little runny inside though. I skipped the salt in this recipe and opted not to cook the sweet potatoes in the chorizo drippings. Trying to be healthier here and that just didn’t sound all that healthy. I’d never had Mexican chorizo before and didn’t even know where to find it. I just happened to be in my local super Wal-Mart of all places and discovered they’d seriously branched out the hispanic section since I’d last been there, which was lucky for me!

Lastly, I made chicken enchilada casserole, which turned out to be a somewhat exhausting dish to make. I had fun making it, but I’d definitely recommend this one for colder months because it includes roasting an entire chicken. My apartment roasted right along with it. I was a little lost on the chipotle pepper in adobo sauce ingredient but I found this post that listed gluten-free options. I went with La Costena brand because that’s what they had in stock at the store. I think next time, I’d chop up these peppers because they are huge and that means that not every enchilada gets one in them. Also, I somehow ended up with enough extra filling to stuff 9 extra enchiladas. I’m not sure how that happened but it’s not a bad thing. The only thing I changed in this recipe was to use less cheese.

I think next weekend I may try a couple of the Indian flavor dishes. Can’t wait! :)

How grouchy you might wonder (just so you know whether to avoid me right now or not? :P)? Well, I got spam in the mail today. I kept moving it around on my desk, annoyed that it was there. It was from some place I get Ruki’s meds from but I never signed up for mail. This sort of thing always makes me angry. Let’s more forward into the day a little more, since work pulled me away from it for a bit.

Later, mid conversation, I noticed it on my desk again. More than that, I noticed that it was covered in pics of dogs. Dogs! The nerve! I picked it up and start ranting about how if they were going to spam me, they could at least pay attention to the fact that I only order cat products from them. I tore it open ranted about how every single picture is of a dog, all the while shaking the paper about, and pointing at the offending dog pics. “Look! It’s all dogs, not one cat. What’s wrong with them?” Finally, I flung it across my desk and huffed.

Yeah….

Normally I would just throw it out. Maybe grumble a “Freaking spam” as it went into the bin. But I’m a little twitchier right now. It’s the hunger.

I started dieting this week. Week 1 is always downright brutal. Today is day 3 and that also means day 3 of no sugar and no dairy. Bleh. The sugar had to go anyway because of my PCOS. Doc said so. I had most of it gone from my diet anyway, but it was finally time to try to kick what was left out. As for the dairy, I’m testing an allergy thing. My allergist hasn’t tested me on food allergies since her focus seems to be on environmental issues right now. But man oh my, I’m having serious cheese withdrawal!

But if that wasn’t enough of a reason to be grouchy, I have another reason too. I finally stepped on a scale again. I think I’ve ignored it for 6 months. I mean sure, I stubbed my toe on a few times and washed some dust off of it, but I didn’t dare step on it. I’m not blind. I knew I had gained weight after a pretty difficult year. But, my oh my, I still wasn’t ready for it.

Okay, maybe I didn’t have that bad a reaction, but it wasn’t pretty. I think mostly there was a hell of a lot of cursing. I’ve become a tub of goo. And now I’m picturing myself being rolled away by Oompa Loompas to the juicer.

If only it would work like that. But now I know and have a starting point to kick off from. It only gets better from here right?

See this jar?

I set it on my shelf with the idea that I’d fill it with notes about all the good things that happened as the year went on. Notice how it’s still empty? Yeah…kinda sums up the year so far doesn’t it?

See why I want to start over?

I started out the year with all sorts of goals. What I didn’t realize was that my health was about to go kablooey. What’s worse, is that I’m ashamed to admit that I should have realized what was happening sooner.

Last Fall I started back to school, working towards a Math degree. I had no idea what kind of hell I’d just slipped into. I knew that as a 5 credit class, it would be a lot of work. I wasn’t prepared for it turning into a second fulltime job.

Oh, side note! I learned this semester that the volume of homework we get is because the board wants extra work to justify giving credits to those of us who are learning online. This policy seems odd to me. My class is taught to on-campus and off-campus students at the same time. Those of us who are off-campus just listen to the lectures online. That’s pretty much the only difference. Those who sit on college boards have no sense of what the real world is like. I don’t know why I always forget that fact.

Anyway, being the perfectionist that I am, I wanted an A. In order to get that A, I sacrificed my health. I ignored the fact that I was getting migraines more regularly and that I was chronically congested. I also ignored the exhaustion because I chocked it up to having little time to sleep. I was so tired, I had to stop running regularly, especially on days leading up to and on exam days. I almost nodded off on a few tests and even had the time run out on me on one test (first time that ever happened to me!). Yet, I got my A. I considered it a win, even though I felt like hell. However, I did start to worry about how Spring semester would go.

During my holiday, I did what I could to prep myself for another time consuming schedule. I created a flexible calendar for myself that would balance out time for work, rest, homework, and things like running and cooking healthy meals. Yet, as class started again, I was already feeling so rundown. I figured out quickly that I didn’t have anything left to give to the class. My first test came and I barely pulled a B on it. Two days later, I got a cold from hell and my body had a meltdown.

Where I was able to sacrifice health to do well in my class last semester, this semester…well, my health had deteriorated to the point that I had nothing left to give. It took weeks for the cold to pass. Through all of it, I barely had enough energy to make it through the workday, even working in my pjs on the couch. I fell behind on homework. And I got sicker. As the cold passed, congestion remained. My body started reacting badly to things that wouldn’t normally bother me. It was a mild winter, yet my legs were covered in dry splotches that looked and felt like sores. My nose started to bleed and didn’t stop, for months. Some days I was lightheaded because of it. Many foods started making me sick too.

With the extreme exhaustion, I gave up cooking for the most part. I fed the depression it gave me with ice cream. And cheese. Mmm. Oh yes, watch the weight grow. *sigh*

At some point, I started suspecting that I was having an allergic reaction. The headaches, body aches, and food issues were all problems I had with the onset of my gluten allergy. In that case, my body was so toxic from the gluten that I’d developed a temporary allergy to dairy (WORST 3 months EVER – no cheese! – oh the horror!). And after many doctor appointments, I finally got a diagnosis of an allergic reaction. Or rather reactions since I had multiple ones going on.

The doctors estimate they started about 7 months ago and built up until the cold I got in January made everything all the worse. For a while I thought it was mold growth at work since I work in a historic building that isn’t well maintained. Turns out, my problem is dust mites. And trees. And ragweed. And a slight allergy to my cat. *sigh*

So, now I have a list of things to do at home and at work to make the environment around me more tolerable. I’ve still got a ways to go to prep everything but I am already starting to feel better. The medications are certainly helping too. I’m most frustrated with the idea that I’m not longer allowed to run in the early AM because of the trees and ragweeds. That’s the best time to run! I love watching the sunrise! *yet another sigh*

Now that I am starting to put my life back together, I feel like I can start on my goals again. I can get back on track with my diet and ease back into my running routine. But the math. Oh, the math. That is where May 1 comes into play. My final exam is on April 30 and once that is done, I am free! I don’t know that this program is right for me. It’s the right price, and everyone I’ve dealt with at the school seems incredibly nice, but the time commitment…realistically, it’s time to put my health first. Physically and mentally. I have the summer off and I’ll have to do some real soul searching to decide if I’m going back in the Fall or not. Only time will tell. If there is one thing the math has taught me though, it’s that my mind can be alert even with such fog going on physically. Also, if I can carve out the amount of time I did for all that homework, I have no excuses for not writing. Not a damn one.

So there you have it. A look at why 2013 has been kinda sucky for me, but there is now hope that things will get better. May 1 is almost here and it will be time for a wonderful fresh start!

I can’t wait for 2013 to start! Only a few days left to go. Yay! I’ve set up a few goals for the year:

Running

I already posted about my 1,000 mile running/walking goal, but I’ll add it here too. I want to get in the habit of running regularly. I’ve love to get into a schedule of running 20 miles a week. I’ll be working up to it. I want that 1,000 miles to be mostly running, but I know I have to work up to the 20 miles a week thing. So, walking will fill in for the extra miles as I go.

Yoga

I’ve neglected my yoga practice and that’s sad because I loved the class I took. And I feel so much better when I practice it regularly. I’m going to try to go to a class once a week to try to get me motivated to do more of it at home.

Diet

My diet fell by the wayside last year. Stress and the insane amounts of math homework and studying helped me along the way there. My poor planning meant I ended up eating crap instead of the healthy meals I should be eating. This year I am setting up a scheduled menu. I already have the first few weeks of January planned out and aim to set up monthly plans (including my grocery list based on these plans). I also just restocked my pantry and freezer so I have foods on hand to make in a pinch.

When I cook, I aim for whole foods and as little processed foods as possible. This year I’ll also be removing sugar from my diet to help combat PCOS symptoms. I already got rid of fake sugars, but now it’s time for sugar itself to go. I’ve cleaned out my pantry to make sure I don’t have any foods left with it in it. Raw honey, agave nectar, and maple syrup are all that’s left and what I’m sticking to for now.

Ease Up On Self

This one is gonna be hard to do, but I will try. I was impossibly hard on myself about math last year. I was overwhelmed by the amount of work I had to do (in shock over it really) that I felt like I wasn’t achieving the level I should be. Yep, I was being ridiculous. I’ll admit it. And I ended up doing very well in the class despite myself. My goal for this year is to not fret so much and to not be so hard on myself for getting wrong answers.

Reiki Practice & Meditation

I am realizing lately how lacking my life feels by not practicing Reiki. I plan to ease back into it and use it to help with stress relief.

And that’s that. :)