1) Before dating again- take the time to rediscover who you really are.

2) Be yourself. Be the person you are trying to attract.

3) Date with the intention of having fun and letting go of any expectations.

4) Get to the know the person before getting intimate.

5) Don’t prejudge. A good one may pass you by.

6) Have a sense of humor. Laughter is rated #1 as the most attractive quality.

7) Date someone more than once, to really get to know them.

Date a lot of people to know what you really like.

9) Take care of yourself…exercise, eat healthy and get plenty of rest! Feeling good on the inside shines through on the outside.

10) Stick to your values—honoring your own boundaries is attractive.

11) Focus on developing a friendship first. Hold on to your heart and don’t get serious too quickly.

12) Be aware of your thought patterns that are not serving you; for example, I’m too fat or he/she will never be interested in me.

13) Be aware of your “gold nuggets” that already exist within you. You are unique!

14) Don’t focus your conversations on past negative relationships.

15) Be aware of how you are feeling during the date—This feels right! This does not feel quite right! Listen to your “inner voice.”

16) Be open to trying new things that interest the other person. Have fun!

17) Be spontaneous.

18) Be proud of who you are.

19) Don’t be afraid to say no.

20) Be honest—a relationship without trust is a waste of time.

21) Once again…BE YOURSELF. Be the person you are trying to attract.

Joanie Winberg
Divorce Mentor, Certified Human Behavior Consultant.

Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Radio Talk Show
www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
jw@joanwinberg.com

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Following are three keys to avoiding another empty, painful and unfulfilling relationship.

Granted, we may never find the perfect person, because no human being is truly perfect. We all have our flaws, habits and idiosyncrasies. However, we stand a better chance of finding the right person if we take time to:
1) Know Our Own Heart
2) See With Our Heart
3) Be True to Our Heart

Knowing Our Own Heart: To know our heart requires our taking time for some honest introspection as we search our heart to determine the following:

• What does my heart really desire in life and love?
• What was it that I didn’t see before, overlooked, or accepted in the past that led to my heart-break?
• What type of person, attributes and values do I really respect?
• What types of behaviors and attitudes upset or turn me off?
• How do I want to be seen and treated in a relationship?
• What would make me feel loved, cared for, and secure in a relationship?
• What does my heart fear in a relationship?
• What do I want to be able to give in a relationship?

Perhaps, now we know what we really want. So how do we find it? We find it by looking with our hearts, and not just our eyes, to what is within another. That is where we’ll find what is truly essential.

Seeing With Our Heart: With the eyes we merely observe others. The eyes can only like or become infatuated by what they see on the surface. To love requires knowing, which in turn requires looking with our hearts to what is essential within another, that being the heart, soul, personality and values.

When we leap into a relationship based only on what we see with our eyes, we miss what’s essential for attaining real love. By missing out on discovering the person within, we risk learning too late, after much heartache, resentment or strife, that this was not the right person for us.

• Take time allow the other person to reveal them self to you and then allow your heart time to have a good look.
• Just because a person’s attractive on the outside doesn’t mean you’ll find an equally attractive person on the inside. Sometimes what’s found within is quite opposite.
• Conversely, a person who may at first appear plain to you on the outside can become a most beautiful and desirous person when you allow your heart to discover the wonderful person within. (This person makes you feel good, alive and loved.)
• Remember, while physical chemistry is a key ingredient to romance, physical novelty and excitement naturally wane somewhat with time and age. What lasts in a loving relationship is the intimate and nurturing bond of hearts and spirits.

Of course, a person cannot become truly known to you or your heart unless they are willing and able to be open and honest in revealing them self to you. If they are not, then you should consider moving on sooner rather than later. It is better to cut your losses, while there’s less to lose and little harm done, than to endure another bitter, empty and painful relationship.

So, too, must we not allow fear of rejection to prevent us from being sincere in how we present ourselves to others. After all, it does no good if we don’t allow the other person to also know our heart. For that person can never come to love what they’ll never know, that being whom we really are.

Being True to Our Heart: Ultimately, we are responsible for our own hearts and happiness. What we do with our hearts is always our choice, as is what we subject ourselves to in a relationship.

To determine if we’re being true to our hearts, we might ask ourselves the following:• Am I able to become comfortable opening up with this person?
• Do they open up to me?
• Is my heart or inner being sensing “red flags”?
• Am I finding within them the qualities, values, and traits that are important to me?
• Is their heart and inner being proving to be endearing or turning me off?
• Am I feeling more or less secure with this person?
• Do I actually enjoy their company and not just sex?
• Are we both developing a genuine affection and concern for one another?
• Am I settling for someone I don’t genuinely respect, have doubts about, or do not trust?

Give yourself time to calm the physical adrenalin. Then try to see and listen with your heart to determine how you really feel inside.

In summing up, true love grows from within and develops from the heart-to-heart connection that is made when we come to know another by having looked with our heart.

Until next time,
William

Thank you William for a very informative article on how to achieve a true heart-to-heart relationship.

Bill Lacey
Author- “Seeing with the Heart”
www.walacey.com
willunite@aol.com

Joanie Winberg
Divorce Mentor, Certified Human Behavior Consultant.

Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Radio Talk Show
www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
jw@joanwinberg.com

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For Men

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Contrary to popular belief, there are many men with the ability to multitask. I am one of those men. I enjoy working on several different projects at once and seeing them all to completion. This gift however does come with a downside. The downside is that my mind can wonder in many different directions at one time; I am often prone to distractions.

Many times distractions are minor such as conversations with my wife or business associates that temporarily take my mind off of my work. These types of minor distractions do not cause major issues.

I want to tell you about a major distraction that men have shared with me from all backgrounds and socio-economic statuses; a distraction that have destroyed marriages or could have potentially destroyed marriages. The distraction is other women! This is no surprise and is as old as time itself.

I have three questions for men that I hope will bring them back to reality. Here we go!

1. What would happen to your life, especially your home life if you were to allow this distraction to become reality?
2. Is this distraction worth it?
3. How would you feel if your wife was dealing with the same “distraction” or was thinking about it?

These are questions I have asked myself as well as other men when confronted with this type of “distraction”. The bottom line is that the key to being in a happy healthy marriage is to stay focused!

Many marriages end in divorce simply because people did not stay focused and alert to distractions on a daily basis and before they knew it, they drifted apart. Of course , women are not the only distraction. Work, hobbies, sports, church, extended family; almost anything can become a distraction if you are not aware and careful.

My advice is simple, make focusing on your marriage a daily discipline! When you do, answering the three questions with the right answer will be easy!

Until next time…..

Carlos

Carlos Phillips
Executive Director
Healed Without Scars Ministries
www.hwsministries.com

Thank you Carlos for a great article!

Joanie Winberg
Founder of the National Association of Divorce for Women and Children,
Divorce Mentor, Certified Human Behavior Consultant.

Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Radio Talk Show
jw@joanwinberg.com
www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com

Support for you! You are not alone!

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For Men-

From 2009 – 2010, I had the pleasure and great experience of co-hosting a unique weekly segment with Dottie Coffman on, The Dottie Coffman Show, WIMO Radio in Georgia. The segment was called, What Women Wonder.

The idea was that we would provide a forum in which women could ask the questions they always wondered about men, love and relationships, and receive an answer from a man’s perspective. Each week I was assigned a different question or two from a female listener.

I would answer the question(s) as thoughtfully as I could and then we’d open it up for discussion… or for an occasional ambush, depending on my answer. Ha! Sometimes we’d have live call-ins and other times female guests in the studio joined in the discussions. While we enjoyed some laughter in debating the lighter questions that women posed from an amusing curiosity about men, we had many thought provoking, heart-to-heart discussions on questions pertaining to serious issues or concerns that women had about men and their relationships.

As a man, I must say, the show was an eye-opener for me and provided a terrific opportunity to learn more about women and their perspectives on love, life and relationships.
Note: (As I always disclaimed, I do not speak for all men but offer just one man’s opinion, with the exception that some answers were based on published surveys of men’s opinions.)

Following are a few of the most popular or pressing questions that women asked:

1) What are things that turn a man off when he is just getting know a woman on the first couple of dates?

This depends on the man and what they are looking for, certainly, but here are some general turn-offs; many of which are probably turn-offs for women, as well.
• Unloading all of your burdens and problems on the first dates
• Talking about all the guys who have done you wrong
• Talking at length about your last boyfriend or ex
• Interrogating a man about whether he’d be the same as the men in your past
• Reciting a litany of your pet peeves, rules and “must haves”
• Telling him or insisting on how he must be

In other words, slow it down. Take some time. Besides running the risk of overwhelming him, why confide in him so early? After all, you don’t really know the man and haven’t established whether you even trust him with all this personal detail about you. Also, beware that some men try to manipulate women by exploiting perceived vulnerabilities. Let him earn your trust first and observe how he treats and talks about others.

• Inappropriate attire and appearance for the place or circumstance of your date (Being too overtly sexy or being too casual and sloppy)

A prospect for a serious relationship wants to be physically attractive and accentuate the positive, certainly, but a man also admires the lady in a woman and her knowing what’s appropriate for an occasion. In looking ahead, perhaps consider whom he’d want to take home to meet the family. Also, many men rely on a woman’s good sense or taste to guide them in certain social settings. Some truly appreciate this in a partner. It can help them in business situations, too.

Of course there’s a balance to be struck with wanting to be physically appealing and attracting the type of man you truly desire. You don’t want to distract him as a billboard advertising sex when what you really want is a man to take the time to get to know you without making the wrong assumptions. You needn’t rush yourself into a relationship nor feel you need to hook him with your body. There’s a great woman inside and a good man looking for her.

2) How can a woman be sure there won’t be affairs in a relationship?

First I would say that there are no guarantees considering all the variables associated with people and relationships. Certainly there are exceptions to anything I or a great multitude of experts and counselors might advise, or to any rule of thumb about relationships. However, in general, I do believe that there are certain negative traits, attitudes, behaviors or elements of personal history that can serve as red flags for a woman, just as there are positive traits and attributes that a woman can look for in a man. These negatives and positives combined can help serve as a kind of compass by which to gauge the odds or risks of infidelity within a relationship with a man.

Let’s look at some of the negative signs, some of which may seem extreme or obvious but nonetheless are often overlooked or accepted:

• Pornography – Does he have a collection and is he insistent on keeping it? Does he spend time on internet pornography sites, and does he consider it harmless entertainment?
• History – Are you aware of his having cheated on others before you? Even if he says it is different with you…be forewarned. Was he cheating on someone else with you as you entered into your relationship with him?
• Mistrust – Do you catch him in lies about different things? Are there other reasons that cause you to doubt or mistrust him?
• Is he non-committal about the relationship?
• Does he consider monogamy a huge challenge, unrealistic or against human nature?
• Don Juan – Is he always flirting with the girls, exhibiting a wandering eye in your presence, and claiming it is harmless?
• Was he always running around with lots of women or picking up one-night-stands, and claims he’s ready to settle down? Or do you feel that you can get him to settle down and quote, “Be enough for him”?
• Do you feel you had to use a lot of sexiness to entice him into a relationship?
• Does he have general hostility toward women or put you down publicly or privately? Does he have a disrespectful edge or do you feel sincerely respected by him?
• Does he possess a lack of interest in your intellectual abilities and talents, or those of women in general?
• Have you observed disrespectful or abusive behavior toward women by other men in his family?
• Is there a mutual interest in keeping the spark alive?

Now let’s consider some of the positives to look for:

• He thinks of you and likes you with him. He even asks you to come along on errands.
• Grant it, many of us men aren’t chatty…but he confides in you and asks your opinions, especially on significant matters.
• He enjoys a friendship as well as a romance with you.
• He desires and enjoys your affection…not just sex…but affection. There’s a difference and a real warmth and bond associated with affection and affectionate gestures.
• He expresses his affection for you and does it often and easily.
• He’s attentive and displays that he has your best interest always at heart. He has your back.
• He recognizes when others “blow a good thing” or treat a woman poorly and expresses his disdain.
• Important! He treats other women respectfully, regardless of age.
• He’s loyal to others and acts ethically in other matters.

“ Love measures our stature: the more we love, the bigger we are. There is no smaller package in all the world than that of a man all wrapped up in himself.” –W.S. Coffin, Jr.

Hold out for a big man with a big heart and strong character, ladies.

3) Why do men feel they need to fix everything when I simply want to be heard?

I found this to be a very good question, as it implies a considerable difference in our mindsets.

• First off, men just plain like to fix things. If it is broken we’ll glue it back together. If not working correctly, we’ll take it apart and reassemble it.
• In general but not always, it is in our (men’s) nature to take action rather than ruminate long about a problem. In part this is because many of us tend to be less interested in experiencing feelings associated with a problem than simply resolving or removing it. This may be partially attributed to an innate difference in our nature, in how boys are raised, and in our modeling after male role models.
• Developmental studies in early childhood have demonstrated differences in how males and females generally approach problems. In studies involving toddlers, the difference in how boys and girls responded to an obstacle (a small gate or screen partition) being put in front of them, separating them from a person or object they wanted, clearly indicated an innate difference. Whereas girls would cry and approach and then withdraw from the partition, boys would start right in with pushing against the partition, trying to knock it down, then they’d attempt to climb over it.
• Amongst themselves, men mostly commiserate differently and more simply than women. Expressions of compassion and support are more basic, “That really stinks, man…what are ya gonna do about it? Forget about it! Get rid of it! Here, let me buy you a drink.”
• Because of these differences some men may not know what to do with the feelings or outpouring of emotions that a woman may have over a problem other than to try and fix whatever is upsetting her. Her unhappiness makes him anxious and thus he tries to find a quick remedy.
• In relationships most men genuinely wish to be considered a white knight riding to their woman’s rescue when she’s in distress.
• We may assume that if we remove your problem you will be happy and we will be your hero. Thus both of us will feel good.

Some men are better than others in picking up on their cues. Many may miss the fact that what a woman may want, instead, is to be listened to, comforted, supported, or empathized with. You might just want him to put a caring arm around you and hold you, or weigh options with you. Or merely help you blow off steam.

So how do you get through to him? Honest communication is a good place to start.

• Tell him something’s troubling you or that it’s been a bad day but what you really could use is a good hug and to sit down awhile with him.
• Or “I’d really love to just tell you about it.”
• Perhaps tell him that you like it when he just holds you sometimes and hears you out and/or shares his perspective on a matter.
• Be sure to tell him if it helped to sit and talk or snuggle up a while. He’ll feel appreciated and good about it and come to realize he can be of actual help without necessarily trying to fix or rid you of a problem.

4) Why won’t men stop and ask for directions?

I’ll let you in a little secret, ladies…we do… just not when you’re around. Why?

• We don’t want some other guy bailing us out in front of you.
• We don’t want the other guy to look cooler or smarter.
• We don’t want to give up our man power before you.
• We believe we were descended from warriors, hunters and explorers. As such, we feel we were born with an innate and very keen sense of direction.
• If we’ve ever been anywhere, at least once, and even if it was 15 years ago and the landmarks have all changed, we expect to be able to pick up the trail again.
• The smarter and less insecure among us used to consult a map in advance and chart his course with great care and detail.

The intercession of modern technology…Saved by the beep!
But alas, ladies, modern technology has dulled and practically rendered extinct those once remarkable and innate male senses of direction. Yes, the little marvel, the GPS has saved the day by sparing we men the unspeakable embarrassment of having to give in and ask for directions, while relieving you ladies from all the irritation, angst and wasted time of circling aimlessly with your man at the helm in search of your destination. Plus the GPS affords any man a certain “cool factor”.

You see, any man’s car becomes the Bond 007 car with the GPS. All we need do is install a GPS with a voice guidance option and select the English lady’s voice. Lastly, although we really don’t need a GPS, we do really enjoy a good gadget!

Thank you Bill for a very informative article to help women understand men.

Bill Lacey
Author- “Seeing with the Heart”
www.walacey.com
willunite@aol.com

Joanie Winberg
Founder of the National Association of Divorce for Women and Children, Divorce Mentor, Certified Human Behavior Consultant.

Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Radio Talk Show
jw@joanwinberg.com
www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com


Support for you! You are not alone!

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A colleague was helping a business owner look for funding for his business. He introduced him to a potential investor at lunch. The next day the investor called my colleague and told him that the person was nice but he would never invest in his business. My colleague asked why. The investor said that he had the “Mercedes Benz Syndrome”.

“What’s that?” asked my colleague. The investor explained that during the conversation at lunch he found out that this person was funding a $2200 Porsche lease through the business. He appeared interested in having the business pay for his personal lifestyle. The investor explained to my colleague that his money was not going to pay for a car lease. His investments were supposed to help grow the business; not the owner’s personal “finer things of life”. He went on to explain that he called this the “Mercedes Benz Syndrome” where the business pays for unnecessary personal assets, i.e. the owner’s “Mercedes Benz”. Investment that is supposed to go towards the business’ needs goes towards the owner’s personal needs.

It struck me that a lot of business owners and other people do this too. I know some. You probably know some. These are the people who, when they get a large influx of cash, spend it rather than save it. These are the people who use the cash to buy unnecessary clothes, cars, jewelry, and more. Instead of saving it and potentially invest it in assets that produce interest and capital gains, they invest in themselves.

Don’t get me wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying the fruits of your labor. However, you can’t do it at the expense of your business or future needs. You have to save cash for the downturns. You have to save “for a rainy day”; especially if you are starting a business after you turn 55.

So how do you avoid the “Mercedes Benz Syndrome”? You make sure that you are earning enough on your job and you save some of the money you generate and that which you get as settlements. You can actually save relatively painlessly. Save 10% of every check that comes in the door. That means if your deposits for the week total $1,000 you write a check into a savings account for $100. That $100 will start earning interest.

This savings plan is not difficult to do. However, it takes discipline. Whenever you get a check, you have to have the discipline to write a check to a savings account for the portion of the money that needs to go to savings.

How much should you save? This is totally up to you. It depends on how much emergency cash you think you need. Many businesses have lines of credit. Many people have equity lines of credit on their homes. If you have a line of credit and it isn’t used, that can be a form of emergency cash. However, even with that safety net, many company owners and people like to have at least two to three months overhead expenses saved. Their reasoning is that if nothing came in the door, then they could at least pay their people (or their living expenses) for a reasonable time. You’ll need some savings that are fairly liquid, i.e. you can turn them into cash quickly. Other savings could be more long term which probably will earn more interest.

Hopefully you don’t have the “Mercedes Benz Syndrome”. Good savings will prevent you from a financial hardship in years to come.

*** Ruth King is the best selling author of The Courage to be Profitable. Contact Ruth at rking@ontheribbon.com or go to TheCouragetobeProfitable.com.

Joanie Winberg
CEO of the National Association of Divorce For Women & Children and Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Mentoring Program and radio talk show.

jw@joanwinberg.com
www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com

To appreciate life, it’s essential to plan but there are some situations, such as divorce, which you can’t always foresee on the horizon. Instead, the important thing is to react to the situation as best as you can as it develops and to remember that there are always things you can do and situations to look forward to.

For anyone who has just experienced a divorce or is going through the process at the moment, here are a few things you should do to make the best of your future after a divorce or separation.

Think about a pension

Now pensions may not be the most fun subject to approach when it comes to enjoying life, but we must plan for every angle. Setting up and putting into a pension plan will not only put your mind at rest and let you enjoy life, but it will also allow you to develop a continued confidence the older you get. For those who are recently divorced, securing your pension is a great way to ensure steady income in your later years. Your pension isn’t necessarily dependent on a spouse or partner so this is money which you can call your own.

Think about a healthcare plan

The National Health System (NHS) is precariously balanced at the moment, but don’t worry – there are a great deal of private healthcare companies operating out there which delivery fantastic and extremely well priced services. Whether you have a pre-existing condition or are simply planning for all eventualities, there are packages available to suit everyone. For those who are recently divorced but have children or other dependents this is a great way to secure your future and theirs.

Think about making a will

The older we get, the more we begin to think about the future of others. This can be extremely stressful when done much later down the road, so making a Will as early as possible is a great way to build for the future.

For those without a Will, events such as marriage and divorce proceedings can have a profound impact on how assets are divided. With any major life event you should review your Will to make sure it accurately reflects your wishes and this is especially important during a divorce. There are plenty of firms such as Co-Operative wills to make the process as simple as possible, leaving you more time to enjoy the good things in life and look after your family at the same time.

We hope this has been helpful!

Joanie Winberg
CEO of the National Association of Divorce For Women & Children and Founder of the Single Again! Now What? Mentoring Program and radio talk show.

www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com

I believe that the big problem in our society is that we emphasize the material world and disparage the inner feelingful world. Yet that is where it is at; it is the inner world of subtle imagination, subtle feeling and perception that leads us to an intuitive knowing-ness that opens up the tremendous powers of direct knowing, healing, and insight into the future, remote viewing and the comfort of knowing our immortality.

I have often wondered why most people are not interested in knowing themselves better, inwardly. Why they are against introspection and expressing and researching their feelings, right and wrong. My guess is that they/we are taught to be ashamed of that, and even more of expressing that. Yet there is the path to self-discovery and the release of self-potential – potential in which the sky is the limit.
There is a caveat however. It is not easy to confront the things of which we are afraid. It is even harder to tolerate the anxiety of holding them in mind long enough to change them. Yet 50 years of experience in psychotherapy tells me that it is not only worthwhile but leads inevitably to a wiser, more peaceful, more empowered and more loving an individual.
This is a therapy/formula not only for the individual but for the collective, leading the a better world, and the best solution to the problems of the world.

A Simple Path- To Enlightenment
So – what is the path?

The path to enlightenment is simple. It is merely a matter of turning your gaze inward, honoring the inner and feelingful world.

1. To become aware of your talents and assets; exercise them well for yourself and for others.

2. To gaze inward and find the faults, the obstructions, and to be fiercely courageous while looking at them.

3. To tolerate the anxiety of being “wrong.”

4. To tolerate the effort to change what needs to be changed.

5. To do this consistently and almost constantly as you walk through life, weaving this new way into your life and actually noticing each time what needs to be changed and what needs to be released as good.

6. Ultimately you will be following the path to enlightenment.

7. The Divinity that you are inside will be released.

The steps then are:
1. Look inward, introspect.
2. Find, respect, and exercise your talents.
3. Face your faults with fierce courage.
4. Tolerate the anxiety of being wrong.
5. Tolerate with patience the effort to make change in what is wrong.
6. Be constantly on the look-in/look-out.

Written by:
Maurie D. Pressman, M.D.
www.mauriepressman.com

Joanie Winberg, CEO of the National Association of Divorce For Women & Children and Founder
of the Single Again! Now What? Mentoring Program and radio talk show.

Skype: vermonter2004

www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com

Do you feel like you are living in limbo?

To achieve the right balance, you first need to know your values and priorities so you can allocate more time to those areas when time is limited. To help you prioritize, start by paying attention to what makes you get out of bed in the morning… what truly makes you happy.

People often look at work/life balance as having an equal balance between the two. They view it as a balanced scale. Unfortunately, this belief does not take into account your life’s purpose or your dreams and goals which can change overtime.

Take an easy and quick assessment to find out how well you are currently balancing your life’s many activities that is perfect for you Right Now!

This assessment provides a comprehensive look at finding a balance between work, family, friends, activities, and time alone.

CLICK HERE to get started!

If you liked this content, please ‘like and share.’

Joanie Winberg, CEO of the National Association of Divorce For Women & Children and Founder
of the Single Again! Now What? Mentoring Program and radio talk show.

Skype: vermonter2004

www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com
www.SkillsForPeople.com

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Facts about Divorce… Did You Know?

1) Only one U.S President is known to have been divorced: Ronald Reagan.s

2) Western states typically have the highest marriage and divorce rates, followed by the South. The Northeast has the lowest marriage and divorce rates.j

3) According to 2012 U.S. Census Bureau statistics, New Jersey has the lowest divorce rate. New York, Connecticut, Delaware, and Massachusetts round out the top five lowest rates. The East coast in general has a divorce rate of less than 12%.j

4) According to 2012 U.S. Census Bureau statistics, Nevada has the highest rate of divorce at 14.7%. Wyoming, Florida, Kentucky, and Tennessee all have rates of divorce over 13.%.j

5) Some researchers note that men are eight times more likely than divorced women to commit suicide. They are also twice as likely to suffer depression and heart attacks.p

6) Experts note that if a spouse has gained more than 20% of his or her body weight, divorce is more likely.

7) Contrary to popular belief, premarital cohabitation does not increase a couple’s divorce risk—if the couple intends to get married.e

The divorce rate for couples over 65 years old has doubled since 1980.i

9) Children of divorced parents are twice as likely to drop out of high school and less likely to attend college.b

10) According to U.S. statistics, if one partner smokes, a marriage is 75% more likely to end in divorce.q

11) Research shows that couples in Republican states are 27% more likely to divorce than couples in Democratic states. Couples in Republican states have historically married younger than their Democratic counterparts.j

12) First marriages that end in divorce usually last approximately 8 years.m

 Resources

^b Bergin, Rory M. and Jared Meyer. 2012. Frequently Asked Questions about Divorce (FAQ: Teen Life). New York, NY: Rosen.

^e “Cohabitation before Marriage? It’s No Greater Divorce Risk.” The Christian Science Monitor. March 22, 2012. Accessed: October 13, 2012.

ⁱ “Divorce Statistics.” Divorce Statistics. 2012. Accessed: October 13, 2012.

^j “Divorce Stats in the U.S. by Age and Region of the Country.” Family LawCourts. 2010-2012. Accessed: October 13, 2012.

^m “Most People Make Only One Trip down the Aisle, but First Marriages Shorter, Census Bureau Reports.” United States Census Bureau. September 19, 2007. Accessed: October 13, 2012.

^p Ritter, Bill. “Men after Divorce: In Touch with Feelings.” ABC. March 13, 2012. Accessed: October 11, 2012.

^q Rufus, Anneli. “15 Ways to Predict Divorce.” The Daily Beast. May 19, 2010. Accessed: October 3, 2012.

^s Wapshott, Nicholas. “Jane Wyman, Reagan’s ‘Button Nose.’” New York The Sun. September 11, 2007. Accessed: November 9, 2012.

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If you liked this content, please like and share.

Joanie Winberg, CEO of the National Association of Divorce For Women & Children

Skype: vermonter2004

www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com

Tools For Your Business and Help with Cash Flow

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- Why did you do that?
- What were you thinking?
- What were you not thinking?

Trying to understand another person’s behavior can be frustrating and very stressful. To help deal with your frustration, it is important to remember that everyone is unique.

With that being said, would it be fair to say that if I understand you and you understand me, chances are we would have a better relationship? Absolutely!

As a Certified Human Behavior Consultant, the formula that I teach is to first understand yourself (what makes you tick), than to understand others (what makes them tick); put all this information together and what you are going to create is an incredible relationship.

It is very common for people to marry their opposites and who do you think we know least about? Our opposites! It seems that opposites attract and then opposites attack!

Why do second marriages have a higher divorce rate than first marriages? Could it be that people are jumping into another relationship without coming up for air and taking the time to learn more about themselves and understanding others? If I had this valuable information after my divorce, I would have made other choices when dating.

Imagine:
- Having less frustration and stress when co-parenting with your ex?
- After just the first date, knowing if that person is right for you?
- As a single parent, learning to speak the same language as your children/teenagers to improve listening skills and co-operation?

To learn more about how to communicate with ease, join me for a FREE teleclass, Wednesday, January 16th @ 8PM EST. To save your spot, go to www.FreshStartAfterDivorce.com

I look forward to meeting you,
Joanie Winberg
Certified Human Behavior Consultant and Divorce Mentor

Sponsor: The National Association of Divorce for Women and Children