Post-nap on Saturday afternoon, Darin is getting Emma ready to go back to her mother’s house.

Darin: Emma, go find your shoes. The ones you had on yesterday, from your mom’s house.

Emma: What are they called?

Darin: It doesn’t matter what they’re called; they’re brown, find them!

Emma: (Inaudible to him) … But if I don’t know their names, they won’t come when I call them …

They’re Wallabees, for the record.

—

On the way to church Sunday morning. Jaiden has just been yelled at and to smooth her self-confidence, Jenna and I talk about the things she does that makes us love her.

Jenna: She read me dat book! The one about Strawbewwy Showtcake! But sometimes she doesn’t let me come into her woom and Emma says, “Let’s go, Jenna …”

Me: Well, Jenna, sometimes big sisters need to spend time alone, especially when they have a lot of brothers and sisters. Sometimes they want some privacy, and that’s okay.

Jenna: Well my Gatowade and my tummy wanted pwivacy but JAI JAI DWANK IT! MY GATOWADE!

—

It’s dinner time and I am also doing dishes, knee deep in both clean up and preparation. Jenna is asking questions. Endlessly.

Me: Jenna, why do you keep asking me questions?

Jenna: Because I’m mouthy! Like you said I am.

—

This afternoon while the girls were eating lunch I asked Jaylen to go upstairs and watch a movie while they ate. He told me he couldn’t watch He-Man because the screen kept turning blue.

Me: Oh, well then your settings are wrong …

Jaiden: He doesn’t know what that means because I don’t know what that means!

Jenna: Dat means you don’t have it set up wight!

—

We’re all groggy and not wanting to wake up and get ready for school and work. Emma slides down the side of her bed …

Emma: (gasp) Oh no! I have an ankle!

(She meant a freckle or something. lol.)

—

At Darin’s first softball game of the season, something for which the children have been eagerly awaiting. Jenna is sitting next to her favorite person there, one of the players’ girlfriends.

Jenna: Cheering for the batter, though not looking up from coloring. Gooo Bwian!!!!

Me: Jenna, you know that wasn’t Brian, right? And that Brian’s actually in the outfield?

Jenna: I know.

Me: You just wanted to cheer for Brian?

Jenna: Yep!

—

Still at the softball game, still coloring.

Me: Jenna! There’s Daddy! Cheer for him!

Jenna: I’m twying to concentwate on my colowing.

—

Dinner’s been eaten, showers have been taken and the kids are brushing their teeth and getting ready for bed. Darin picks up a teasing brush to comb Emma’s hair.

Jenna: Daddy! Don’t use dat one! It puts da tangles IN.

So Darin finds another brush and attempts to brush Emma’s wet hair. She is very tender-headed and, in addition to being a guy and not really getting it, he’s also very heavy-handed.

Through tears, before I can take over, Emma decides to give him a piece of her opinion.

Emma: Daddy, you’re the WORST hair brusher!

—

Minutes later, Jenna is back in the shower having her hair conditioned (because she uses conditioner, then shampoo, when she washes it). She also has a piece of her opinion to share.

Jenna: Daddy IS da worst hair bwusher! He’s da worst hair washa, too. But! He’s da good CAR washa! He’s a good dad. And he’s da BESTEST tool worka. But Uncle TT is da best CAR WORKA. He learnt dat when he was a teenager. Or when he was in school (giggle).

—

And there you have it.

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To recap, because I know it’s been about 52 weeks since we’ve had an update, our laundry room used to be this small closet under our stairs. It was great in theory, very accessible and the hot pink color I painted inside was motivational, but we had a small problem: we didn’t have a dryer vent.

Not having a vent meant that we had to run the dryer with the closet doors open for ventilation. We were afraid the heat would eventually warp the doors.* And the humidity fogged up all of our windows and made all of our non-porous surfaces wet and the lint drove our allergies nuts. Later, through a friend who knew the previous homeowner (gotta love a small town!), I found out that the builders originally forgot to put in a vent (which was corroborated with our septic guy a few months ago) and so the homeowners rigged one, then tiled over the rigged vent later.

I hate that and I also hate this tile. I want carpet or hardwood. But that’s another topic.

In February 2009 we initially discussed the idea and it’s nice to see it finally finished. We moved our washer and dryer into our garage, a move that led to us having to replace the washer after the temperatures dropped to single digits and our pipes froze. Great decision, right?

I painted the office (and our little bathroom, but we’re not talking about that) a light blue, reupholstered and painted antique chairs and Darin installed a wood desk top with a plexiglass cover.

I think that was likely the last update. I kindly spared you photos from over the year – my mess has invaded the space!

Like most wives, I’ve been nagging Darin about the shelves he promised for several months. Last week we finally got them in! I painted them white to go with the chairs (though the color on the chairs is a light, light blue) and Darin installed them.

And it’s done! Finally! After a year! (And I finally have a lens that can photograph this space – another reason to celebrate!)

How awesome does it look?!

This small space has to function as a home office, home-based business office and kid office (storing their art supplies and such). Talk about multi-tasking! I have to store my cameras, lenses, tripod, flashes, etc. here in addition to all of the books and magazines I’m reading, my promotional products, blank DVDs and cases, backup discs, samples, forms and contracts, important documents, school picture day proofs, drawings, camcorder and all of the other menial things (like bills!).

I keep my camera bag in the spare chair to store all of my flashes, memory cards, lenses, batteries, chargers, etc. The rolling filing cabinet between the chairs holds important paperwork, Christmas stationery I didn’t use last year, construction paper and coloring books.

I really love this because I’ve incorporated many functions into this space, but also several things I love: photography and vintage cameras, the beach, books and my family.

The old Mason jar is recycled from our wedding, which was recycled from Grannie’s basement, and contains shells I’ve picked up from the beaches of the Outer Banks. The other jars hold markers and crayons and give a little color. Along the top shelf are my books (including my Book of Common Prayer and New Testament), shell jar (we also have two of these in the living room and two in the master bath), boat I bought off of a friend for $4, a box of my promo items, pool blue stickers from Archivers (rectange and circle), blank DVDs and cases and magazine boxes for glossies as well as important stuff. The double horizontal boxes on the bottom shelf contain samples and user manuals, an old Yashica camera, photo of our family from our July 4 trip to the zoo, kids’ art supplies, a photo of my church family from our food packing event (and in a frame from Dara) and some fun, pretty ceramic vases and a candle.

On the desk top: my external drive and card reader, a lamp I want to replace, of course the all-important MacBook, my calendar and catch-all center (pens, pencils, return address stamp, to-do list pad, CDs, thank you notes, etc.), my late grandmother’s hobnail container that is currently empty, my handheld scanner (muy importante for a reporter or anyone else who’s nosy), plus the mail (my new voter registration card came that day), my file folders and some crap I need to put away already.

You totally caught me on a clean day. Thank you!

I’m really in a sharing mood, so you get to see the inside of some of the boxes. Lucky you! This is the inside of the kids’ box: mini composition book, glue, scissors, stencils, colored pencils and regular-sized markers and whatever else may be lurking inside.

My samples from minted, WHCC and Miller’s. In the bottom drawer I have all of my user manuals, software, product keys, warranties. This is a fun box here, let me say.

As much as I love everything else, the desk top is my favorite part. I love being able to slip keepsakes between the wood and the plexi glass! I have envelopes decorated for me by two of the children, a little Post-It gallery Jaylen drew that night, a paper airplane Jaylen decorated for me (complete with “I [heart] you Mom” – aww!) and a few other things. It’s super sweet!

Each of our children has quite an imagination, but Jaylen is the one who most often translates it into drawing. The furthest left is “sun people”, then a monster truck, a house and pickles. lol. He’s so silly (but he LOVES pickles)!

This is one of my favorite things. Ever.

And of course, a little office nook this cute wouldn’t come without its issues, right? Of course not. I use an aircard from Verizon for Internet and, well, our service sucks. See, we live in a hollow (or holler, if you’re a Randy Travis fan) and we have very spotty service with both AT&T and Verizon (so much for more bars in more places and 97 percent coverage, right?).

It’s supposed to be akin to broadband, but it’s slower than dial-up in certain areas of the house. The office being one of those. In terms of bars, I have one bar in the office, two everywhere else. But if we go up to the lake, where you aren’t supposed to get service, I have four bars. Go figure.

*When we converted to an office, we took the doors off and reused them. One was painted black, topped with plexi glass and is now the tabletop for my husband’s work bench; the other was used as a flat surface to hold items when they were being spray-painted.

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On August 1, Darin and I, Dara and Isaac and my father-in-law, Jim, went to see ZZ Top in Southaven, Miss.

Oh yeah, in a limo, so we could partake in adult beverages if we wished and still be safe.

A limo, yeah. A white one.

“We’re making memories!” Jim said over and over.

(I haven’t been in a limo since I went to prom when I was a junior. I didn’t even ride to either of my weddings in a limo. Fancypants, aren’t we?)

On the way there Jim karate-chopped the lid to the styrofoam cooler. The rest of us were chatting and all of a sudden, the lid is breaking into two pieces and he’s grabbing a beer. lololol. Probably not funny to anyone else, but we have been giggling over that for weeks.

Anyway. So we get there and Edward, our driver, has to drop us off about half a mile from the gate because there was nowhere for him to turn around. Or something. But we had to walk. From our limo.

If you’re, say, approaching 30, have four kids, been married twice and generally unhappy with your appearance, your self-esteem is never so low as when you happen upon bikini babes wearing barely there bathing suits and posing with hairy, shirtless drunk guys. The hairy drunk guys I can do without, true, but seriously young bikini babes, you made me feel pretty freakin’ old right then. I look short and chubby compared to Dara, much less an even taller, even tanner, scantily-clad barely legal chick. Ugh.

Oh, that pizza sucked, by the way.

Right after this I saw a former co-worker. Yes, in another state. What can I say? Darin said he can’t take me anywhere, then of course we sat down and behind us was a couple he used to live next door to (and the wife works with his mother). Ha.

The concert was pretty good. We all enjoyed ourselves, except when this jerky lady kept telling Darin and Isaac to sit down. As Dara so eloquently put it, “Sit down? At a rock concert? Seriously?” She pulled on Darin’s shirt at one point and tried to force him to sit, but we exchanged some not-s0-pleasantries and it didn’t happen again. I wanted to punch her because, for real, don’t put your hands on my husband you angry jerk.

I knew five songs the entire night. The last five songs they played. But we had a good time.

When we were done, Edward was somewhere outside. Dara called his cell phone to make sure he was at the amphitheater and he said, “I’m the only white limo out here!” Touché, Edward, touché.

The ride home was … fun? I remember laughing a lot, but I don’t remember why. And that is probably for the best because I can’t share anything incriminating. When we finally got home, Edward scared the bejesus out of me by popping up by the door when I was getting out. Just out of nowhere, there he was! And he was handing me his business card – for his life insurance business.

Ah, memories.

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This bike was a gift to Jaylen on his fourth birthday. Several months ago Darin removed the training wheels, hoping it would encourage Jaylen to ride a two-wheeler.

It didn’t work.

My children being my children, I know that they operate like I do. We do things on our own time. I will clean and declutter when I’m good and ready to and not a second sooner. Even when my children were younger I knew they were the same.

I encouraged Jaiden to potty train before she was ready and my attempts proved unsuccessful. So I decided to follow her lead, which was probably one of my more brilliant parenting moments. Eventually she asked to wear big girl panties and two weeks later she was trained.

I didn’t rush Jaylen to crawl, but eventually he did and three weeks later, just before he was nine months old, he walked. And Jenna, well she walked late and she still sucks her thumb. (The older two used binkies and weaned themselves from that at 7-8 months.)

Jaylen didn’t want to ride his bike because he was afraid. Don’t ask me why, but I’m guessing he was afraid he’d get hurt. Tonight after dinner he and Jaiden just picked up his bike and off he went! I am so proud of him!

Poor thing: Jaiden made him put on his helmet and pads. Only we can’t find his pads, so he had to wear Disney Princess and Doara pads that belong to his baby sisters. Hee.

I shot photos and video, which required manual focus, and I didn’t switch back to autofocus until after I had shot a bunch of photos and blew it. Ugh, ugh, ugh. But I digress.

I think this is my favorite shot, Jaiden helping Jaylen strap on the girlie pads. So sweet!

But anyway.

My advice to new parents is always “follow their lead.” Because, for us, it works. Of course I mean with milestones and development, not in situations where they need to be obedient (like, ahem, cleaning their rooms).

Today it was riding a two-wheeler, maybe soon Jenna will stop sucking her thumb.

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And now, August. And school, teachers, school buses, etc.

Three of the four children are now in school. The second week of August, Jaiden began third grade, Jaylen began first grade and Emma began Pre-K. Jenna is still with her home-based preschool; she doesn’t have an educational nor a financial need, so we don’t qualify for the public school’s pre-kindergarten program. She knows everything they teach in Pre-K anyway, so next year she will begin school.

For the second year in a row I haven’t requested teachers. Many parents here do, and I did to begin with, but last year I decided to just go with the flow. I haven’t been disappointed, either. Why would I choose to do such a thing, not requesting the perfect teachers for my children? Because I believe they need to learn to deal with whatever comes at them, to react to their environment, not mold their environment to fit their needs. This is not the way the world works. My world obviously revolves around my children, but the rest of the world does not. I send them to school as much for the social and life skills as I do for their education, so it’s important to me that they learn how things really work.

Since Kindergarten, Jaiden has been with the same crew. This year, they were split up. While I’d like Jaiden to stay with some of her friends, she’s going to have to learn sooner or later that we don’t always stay with the same people. And this goes back to the world not revolving around them and learning to deal with whatever happens. As parents I don’t believe we should be that controlling over our children and their environments, but rather teach them to adapt, help them learn how to deal with new situations and new people. As Lou Holtz said, and this is one of my favorite quotes, “life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you deal with it.”

So far, so good; Jaiden misses her friends, but still sees them when they meet for the gifted program or go to lunch.

Jaylen is enjoying first grade. He was thrilled to get “a big desk like the rest of the graders!” Ha! Not to be obnoxious, but I use this blog to record different things about our family and will not downplay my child’s successes in an effort to be seen as less boastful, but Jaylen is doing really well, especially with his vocabulary and reading. I was told he would likely be tested for the gifted program in the spring.

Also, I like their teachers! Jaiden’s teacher is also a harpist and seems very cool; Jaylen’s teacher seems very bubbly and affectionate.

I had issues with their school initially. I found out on the first day of school, the day where we met the teachers and arranged afterschool care, that there would no longer be afterschool care services. Long story short, the school never had a license to keep students. The state found out about it in May and fined the school. They now have to be bussed over to another school.

At first, they were spending an hour on a bus in triple-digit temps when the other school was less than 10 minutes away; the driver had to run her route, then drop these 6-8 children off. This, in my book, was not fair. It was not my fault nor their fault that their own school did not keep children any longer and, in my opinion, they should not have to stay on a bus for an hour because of it. Especially considering I am paying $72 each week to have them in the care of licensed providers yet they would be at the school for 5 minutes before I arrived on three different days each week (two days a week I get off closer to 6 p.m.).

And so I complained to the school board. Three times. And things were changed. I was asked if the change had anything to do with the fact that I work for the newspaper – I have no idea. This was the first time I’d ever spoken to the person who enacted the change, but we live in a small community and most people, especially at the school board, are familiar with my name.

Through his example, I learned ethics from my dad. When he was a health inspector, he rarely ate at any of the restaurants he inspected, not because they were not performing as they should but because he didn’t want any chance of someone accusing him of accepting bribes (hi Dad, that was me listening back in 2000!). I try to operate in this same fashion. Of course I can’t help but live and work and send my children to school in this community, but I do accept responsibility for my faults. When I am pulled over, for example, I do not expect my friends (the police) not to ticket me and I do not expect my friends to fix tickets. I accept tickets because they are doing their job, I was speeding and I deserve to pay a fine and/or appear in court. I don’t complain or give excuses, I do what they ask, I take my ticket and pay the price. Last week I was pulled over and pleaded with a cop to give me a ticket but he wouldn’t do it (he did the last time he pulled me over and some of my friends gave him hell for it, but I insisted he treat me the same as anyone else). I do not want special treatment. And I mean that.

But when it comes to my children, I will do what it takes to make sure they’re safe. If I take issue with something I believe will affect their safety and well-being, I will speak up. They attend school with children from age 4-15, however during this time they are split into groups and monitored; they have little to no contact with children several grades older or younger than they are. The bus is a different story. And my children riding a bus for an hour with 15-year-olds is ridiculous. Having them in the care of the persons to whom I entrust their lives for only five minutes was also not okay. So I spoke up and things were changed. I don’t know if they were changed because of where I work or for another reason, but they were changed. And I have been happy since.

All of that said, Jaiden and Jaylen have about 4-5 times the number of children afterschool here than their home school, so they enjoy it. They love seeing other children, having a locker there and having ice cream on Wednesdays.

And now for Miss Emma Grace …
I have met Emma’s teacher previous to her attending school and she’s married to my co-worker’s brother, but I have yet to officially do the whole meet the teacher thing. Being a stepmom is still a little foreign to me and I absolutely hate not having a say in much. That’s a bit controlling of me, I know, but I want to be as involved as I can. I want to come to orientations and meetings and career day. I don’t know how to have a child in school and not particpate somehow. (This is not about me, I know.)

Anyway, she wears uniforms. And saddle shoes sometimes. And she is supposed to memorize Bible verses like Jenna does. Both girls are on the A Beka curriculum, which is Bible-based learning, again so they should be learning the same things again this year (last year they brought home the same worksheets every week lol). I guess she likes it, though she doesn’t talk about it too much by the time I get to see her.

This year Jenna lost a couple of friends from school. One started kindergarten and the other moved to a larger preschool because his parents thought it would help acclimate him to kindergarten (next year, he’s the same age as Jenna). I hate it because Jenna was pretty sad over it, the three of them having attended the same school for several years now. This week, though, a new friend started. And she is a newborn. If you ask Jenna about Layla, Jenna will say, “She is seven pounds! And she’s thiiiiiis luttle!!!” Which, apparently she is. She’s two months old and the new apple of Jenna’s eye. She is certainly a lover of babies! I think Jenna will make a wonderful mommy or teacher someday.

—–

Tomorrow I’m planning on talking about other fun things we’ve done in August, like a second weekend at the cabin and a trip to the ZZ Top concert. In a LIMO. lol. Hope to see you for the next round!

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