Last summer, I planted two gardenia bushes beside our back patio. All summer long, they prospered and gave us luscious, fragrant white blooms! It was amazing. When winter came, their leaves turned brown--which didn't surprise me. But when spring came around, and everything else greened up and started to blossom, my poor gardenias remained brown-leaved and, to all appearances, dead!

Today's post is a bit extended. But, I hope you will hang in there with me and enjoy the ride.

I had an interesting exchange with one of my sons the other day. He was complaining about a class we are making him participate in. He doesn't see how anything he is learning will help him with what he wants to do with his life. I tried to help him understand how the skills he was learning would be a major benefit in the field he wants to pursue, but to no avail. This is a challenge faced by many parents. I knew I wasn't alone.

Thankfully, the lesson from the movie "The Karate Kid" came to mind. So, my wife and I sat him down at the computer, did a quick search on YouTube and presto, there were the successive scenes we were looking for.

Our stress levels skyrocket by the competitive pull between our work life, family life, and personal life. If you feel this pull, you’re not alone – stress affects everyone. When our drive to achieve goes into overdrive, living an integrated life becomes a distant dream. The stressors mount and drive our choices and keep us stuck in this vicious over-achieving cycle.

Check out the following ways that I have found helpful in talking about coaching. What have you found effective in explaining coaching to someone who is unfamiliar with coaching? 

1. Use language that the listener cannot misunderstand.

The profession of coaching has language that many people are not familiar with. For example, “Coaching is a co-partnership where the client is the expert.” This statement will not compute for most listeners without explanation. But, if you were to say, Coaching is a creative process between a coach and client where the client is supported in maximizing his personal and professional potential. It’s simple yet to the point, and it uses common language that will invite the listener to want to know “how” this is accomplished. 

Two Saturdays ago, I had my black belt test. It was the culmination of four years of studying Tae Kwon Do, a Korean martial art. I originally began because it was a way to do an activity with my son, Thorpe. But when he decided to pull out, I was having too much fun and stayed in.

On the left here, you can see the "shine" my daughters created from the cinder block I broke...and the reason I'm sharing this with you is that it has become a powerful symbol of breaking through in the realm of life. I think you'll be able to relate!

In recent weeks I have been studying the current coaching trends and what coaches must be consonant of when it comes to the coaching profession. We know that coaching is transformation at the organizational level and the personal level. We know that at its core, coaching is a viable profession. Yet, its results are yet to be factually substantiated and coaching in its present state, is not without its critics. I wanted to begin concretely answering the question, “What steps can be taken to develop the professional in to a highly viable and accepted profession that is known for meeting needs, is a solution, and produces results?” I first looked at what the executive coaching audience was indicating to answer a portion of this question.

A number of years ago I had a CEO who was a turnaround specialist say to me, "What gets talked about gets done." That is something I have remembered ever since.

In other words, what we as leaders talk about consistently is what people realize must be important. If the boss is that focused on it, everyone figures there is a reason for it and starts thinking and moving in that direction, sometimes even unconsciously.

As we near launch day for Conversational Leadership, I’ve found myself asking those questions, like we all do in the beginning: “Are we ready?”, “Do we have everything we need?”, “Is there something we’re not thinking about?”, “Is anyone going to hire us?”

Something about the way we were created makes it difficult for us to take a step of faith by getting out of the boat. We drift towards the probability that we will sink, rather than focusing on the possibility that we won’t.