Thanksgiving is just around the corner. It's a good time to try the exercise below—in a board meeting, small group, staff retreat, Sunday school class, ministry team, or other small group setting.

This activity takes its cue from the words of thanksgiving in Paul's prayer for the Philippian Christians. Paul began by thanking God for his fellow believers, thus deepening his connection with them in the most foundational way. When believers today follow his example, expressing thanks for one another, the bond among them also grows stronger.

Exercise

1. Read Philippians 1:3-8 aloud.

2. Explain to group members that you'll use the next 30 to 45 minutes simply expressing thanks for each member. When we affirm fellow Christians, we honor God, who has placed these people in our lives.

At the TAG Consulting Leaders Forum in Scottsdale, Arizona, this week, noted Christian leader Leighton Ford spoke on how to move from crazed busyness to focused attentiveness. Leighton is president of Leighton Ford Ministries. For 30 years he served as associate evangelist and later vice president of the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. His newest book is The Attentive Life: Discerning God's Presence in All Things (InterVarsity, 2008).

In introducing Leighton, Jim Osterhaus pointed out that Leighton has been at the forefront of 4 major church movements of the past 50 years: mass evangelism (with BGEA), reclaiming the social dimensions of the gospel (with Lausanne), the study of leadership (with Arrow Leadership Program), and now the reintroduction to evangelicalism of the good of contemplative living (his books).

A fellow minister told me recently that a Sunday School class had asked for his help. "I was excited when a group in my congregation wanted to grow!" he said. Unfortunately, he said, they seemed to want him to give them the right answers—some type of magical ministerial formula.

My friend, however, knows that ministry isn't magic. And he had worked with enough groups to know that he couldn't give this group pat answers. So instead of talking about curriculum, furniture arrangement, or the thermostat setting, he went deep. He asked, "What are you willing to do to make this class grow?"

Questions can be more powerful than answers. Quick answers, however, remain a temptation. Aren't we the professionals? What if people discover how lost we can be? So we pop off answers, jump on command, and eventually burn out. But instead of answering others' questions, perhaps we need to ask a few of our own.

I was fortunate to learn this lesson as a young minister when I went to the Young Leaders Development Program sponsored by the Center for Congregational Health. Like many young pastors, I wanted to have all the answers. Fortunately, I stumbled across this program, designed for "ministers who are ready to ask the right questions." Fourteen years later, I continue to ask myself the key questions I learned there: Who am I? Where am I? What am I doing?

Where does vision come from?

That's the question that will be answered by Dave Ferguson, a pastor, speaker, writer, and BuildingChurchLeaders.com advisor. Ferguson is leading a webinar for us on Friday, December 4, at 11:00 AM CT, and sign-ups are now open!

Ferguson will be speaking on the basics for casting vision in your church, including the three best ways to communicate vision. If you sit in on the webinar, not only will you get to watch Ferguson deliver his presentation in your browser window—you'll also be able to submit questions, some of which Ferguson will answer.

This is BuildingChurchLeader.com's very first webinar, and we're excited that advisor Dave Ferguson is our debut speaker. We'd encourage anybody who casts vision in their church to set aside an hour in their morning (or afternoon on the East Coast) on December 4 to join us.

For more information about Dave Ferguson, go here.

NOTE: This webinar was originally scheduled for October 28 but has been pushed back. If you couldn't make it to the original time, you can give your schedule another look now.

A delegation of Christianity Today International editors attended the Catalyst conference last week, including BCL editor Drew Dyck. In one of the conference sessions, Nancy Ortberg, founding partner of Teamworx2 and editorial advisor and contributor to Gifted for Leadership and Kyria.com, spoke on powerful themes inspired by her books, Unleashing the Power of Rubber Bands and Looking for God. Here are some notes from CTI executive VP Kevin Miller:

1. The Seduction of Influence
It's tempting to do it for all the wrong reasons. In our lives, there may be a tearing away of the seductions and a refining of the right reasons.

Word 1: Ego. We've brought the celebrity culture into our church and overlook people who are so like Jesus. We attribute more to up-front people than we should, more to attractive people than we should. The solution is to live more deeply into our brokenness.

Word 2: Burden. We place on ourselves a burden in leadership—our numbers, the highs and lows of leadership—it's about power, control, and outcomes, and Jesus didn't talk fondly about any of those things. Free leaders—free of the need for certain outcomes—are the best leaders.

Our theme this week is Making Members Stick. One way you can make your members stick is to give them responsibility. And when you help a new leader step up in the church, both that person and your congregation can grow. Below are a few criteria to help you decide when someone is ready to lead.

Readily accepts responsibility. Potential leaders don't lay low when their services are needed. Willingness to volunteer for small projects is an important characteristic. This means that some of the most able leaders might be behind the scenes.

Understands informal social rules. It takes time for a person to understand how a church works—officially (by-laws and constitution) and unofficially. A basic competence in church dynamics is essential. In some churches, for example, raising your voice in a committee meeting is taboo; in others, it's expected. No matter what the qualifications, someone who cares about and seeks involvement in church life is a greater asset than someone who is unconcerned or too busy.

BuildingChurchLeaders.com recently spoke with one of our advisors, Margaret Feinberg (www.margaretfeinberg.com), to talk about her new book,Scouting the Divine: My Search for God in Wine, Wool, & Wild Honey, which explores the rural imagery of the Bible with the help of people who live and work in those contexts today.

How do you think the book will help our readers—many of whom are pastors?

I think it's a great resource for anyone who preaches, teaches, or leads a Bible study. It's hard to go very many pages in the Bible and not run into sheep, harvesting, planting, seasons, honey, or vines. Scouting the Divine takes readers on an adventure to sit in front of a shepherd and find out how they read John 10, to drive a John Deere tractor and discover the parallels between planting straight rows and keeping our eyes on Christ, to ask a beekeeper what it means to enter a land "overflowing with milk and honey," as well as to stand in a vineyard and ask a vintner how they read John 15. Out of those kinds of experiences come rich spiritual insights and fresh sermon illustrations.

How should a leader carry herself? I don't mean in terms of virtues. I would likely draw consent on this page that a leader should display humility, courage, and charity above all.

I mean physically. What posture should a leader take when walking around doing whatever they do to lead?

I got to thinking about this while reading about prison ministry. Chuck Colson, who has done so much in that area, described his admiration for a fraternity brother he admired deeply and wanted to be like (in his great memoir Born Again). The older man told of his love for the Marine Corps with such feeling he made Colson want to sign up. So he soon stood before a "tall, arch-backed first lieutenant" and asked to join. It is military people who speak of one's "carriage," and take such care to be sure it is appropriate, bold, inspiring. Political leaders care about such things too. Sam Wells describes how future British politicians are taught already in their boarding schools how to hold their heads very erect, as though they could carry a plant on top without letting it so much as quiver.

Vulnerability, our theme this week, is the degree of openness between oneself and others. Finding the right degree is a balancing act. A related challenge in ministry is confidentiality—that is, how open can you be about someone else? These nine questions can help you decide whether what you know should be shared.

1. Am I telling this to someone who can do something about the problem by helping the person or offering discipline or correction?

2. If not, am I telling this to someone who is wise enough to help me sort out my feelings and courageous enough to make me do the right thing: to confront the person or to confess where I was at fault?

3. Is this news approved for sharing?

4. Am I breaking a confidence? If so, is it only because the person is endangering someone's life, including his or her own?

Simon Fox is executive director of Adventures in Caring, an organization that mobilizes volunteers to visit the sick and lonely in hospitals and nursing homes. He spoke with BuildingChurchLeaders.com about the practice of compassion.

What is compassion, and how can it be taught?

Let's start with what compassion is not. It's not just a feeling, a sentimental, touchy-feely thing. At its heart, compassion is the art and practice of being with someone who is suffering. It comes from the Latin root compati. Com means "with, together" and pati means "to feel intensely, to suffer."

There are three aspects of compassion: giving to, doing for, and being with. The first two can be done at a distance. Giving to (those who are poor) can be a check in the mail, and doing for (those who are unable to help themselves) can happen at an emotional distance, such as bandaging a wound without any feeling. But being with requires all of you showing up in body, mind, heart and soul.

Compassion cannot be taught by lecture or sermon alone. Clear examples must be presented, not just theory or philosophy. It is a process of self-discovery. And it is an art, so it must be practiced.

This week's download, Transforming Nominal Christians, is designed to help you assess how well your church challenges and disciples attenders. The piece below gives another model for the idea of discipleship: re-parenting.

To seize upon one of our Lord's favorite metaphors, the "fish" business these days is not as simple as it once seemed. The human fish now come out of outrageously polluted cultural waters, and they bring all the effects of their pollutedness with them. So how do you develop leaders—productive disciples of Jesus—from such a population?

The word re-parenting comes to mind. It suggests an effort at conversion, discipleship, and leadership development—a thorough renovation of one's life in line with Paul's strong words: "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation." Not just a nicer person, but a new creation. Re-birthed! And if re-birthed, then also re-parented.

Re-parenting is selective. You pick a specific group of people and tell them why you've picked them. You tell them that this is not a therapy group and that we are not going to be driven by problems, but rather by possibilities ("henceforth you will be fishing for men" is a biblical example).

The case study below highlights the challenge of guiding a church's prayer life. For help with planning prayer services for your congregation, see our newest download.

The Case
"This church hardly ever prays together," complained Joan, a 40-something church leader. "The only times for congregational prayer are during the services and 30 seconds before our committee meetings." An older man named Bill also chimed in, "Whatever happened to our midweek prayer service? The pastor dropped it five years ago, but that should be the lifeblood of our church."

As the conversation continued, there was a clear consensus among church leaders that Grace Church desperately needed a church-wide prayer awakening. Unfortunately, the traditional model of the midweek prayer service wasn't working anymore. So all the church leaders looked to Pastor Mark to either revitalize the midweek prayer time or jump-start corporate prayer another way. But Pastor Mark, who longed for a prayer awakening in the church, didn't know where to start. Sadly, the deep longing for prayer left Pastor Mark feeling defensive and burdened with yet another program to organize. And the church leaders felt disappointed with Pastor Mark's apparent lack of spiritual leadership.

What Would You Do?

• Who is responsible for the prayer life of the local church? What is the pastor's role? The lay people's?


• What would you recommend as a good starting action for this church board?

Our newest download is designed to help you equip yourself and others in your church for outreach to other faiths. Often the barriers we face in doing this aren't just religious—they're cultural. Below are five cultural barriers a Westerner should look out for.

Event Time vs. Clock Time

In his book A Geography of Time, Robert Levine explores the role of industrialization in how a culture views time. According to Levine, industrialization promotes an ethos of producing and consuming. As a result, people in those cultures live by "clock time." Punctuality and efficiency rule the day. In contrast, less-industrialized cultures are far more interested in emphasizing the priority and obligation of social relationships. Levine refers to these cultures as "event-time" cultures. Events begin and end when all the participants feel the time is right rather than artificially imposing clock time.

What's the time orientation of the people you're hoping to reach out to? Understanding alone can't prepare you for all the challenges that might come with opposing views of time, but it's a good start.

This week's featured download is an orientation guide (all of which are on sale this month) for children's ministry directors. One common challenge in that role is handling parental expectations, which often show up as suggestions—"try this curriculum" or "what about a Christmas program?". Below are some questions to ask of any ideas proposed for your children's ministry.

Does it fit with our mission statement? If the idea doesn't fit your mission statement, propose that a small group or other ministry incorporate the initiative.

Do we have gifted and called people to support the new idea? Someone must lead every initiative, and success depends upon God's gifting, not man's brainstorming.

Is our facility set up for this? The idea may not be feasible if it interferes with other ministries in terms of space, time, or leadership.

One of the primary contributors to our newest resource, Ministry to College Students, is Benson Hines. Below he responds to some college ministry fears that he's encountered.

Why should we use greater means for college ministry when students will be with us for only a few years? And does it make sense to spend time developing strategy when the students we're targeting will soon be replaced by others?

First, the concern over only having a few years with students places undue focus on the length of the time period rather than the intensity of those college years. During those four or five years, students often see spiritual, academic, emotional, and social growth to a far greater degree than in the several years prior to or following college. Those who have been impacted by strong college ministries (like myself) can point to drastic growth in even one year's time—let alone four or five years.

This is also a hinge moment in a person's life, in which actions and decisions carry particular import for years or decades following college. So whether we encounter college students for a year or two or a bit longer, what we do during these years can affect them for a lifetime.

Notably, Christians rarely use this same concern as a reason to devalue high school ministry, though our students spend only four years in high school (which is shorter than many college careers).