bokeen :: my blog is funnier than yours

I’m taking my talents to “The Black Guy Who Tips Podcast”

bokeen — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 22:47:49 +0000

I will be appearing on “The Black Guy Who Tips Podcast” today at 6 PM Central / 7 Eastern. Check that shit out.

Hatecast III

bokeen — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 03:00:46 +0000

To commemorate the one year anniversary of Consumption Junction, Tyler Conium makes his triumphant return to the show. bokeen and Tyler take turns ranting about things that they hate. Tyler discusses how media hype can make a story unenjoyable, activism and “slacktivism,” and uninformed opinions. bokeen focuses his hatred toward much more superficial things, such as Justin Bieber haters, oversized sunglasses and lower body cleavage, including ass cracks.

If you haven’t heard the first two Hatecasts, check out part one and part two.

Follow Tyler on Twitter: @tylerconium

Race trades part II: Making the world a better place

bokeen — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 03:00:07 +0000

The cast of “The Black Guy Who Tips Podcast” joins bokeen for another round of Race Trades, inspired by the classic “Racial Draft” skit from Chapelle’s Show. The Black Delegation of Rod and Karen negotiate with the bokeen-led White Delegation to swap blacks for whites, with the intent of bettering the human race.

Once again, the race trades dramatically changed the world as we know it. Madonna, Ben Stiller and Nicolas Cage are currently adjusting to their new status as African Americans, while Wesley Snipes, Ice Cube and Jada Fire have been welcomed to White America with open arms. A complete list of trades appears below.

If you haven’t heard the first Race Trades episode, listen to it here.

Check out The Black Guy Who Tips Podcast
Follow Rod on Twitter: @rodimusprime
Follow Karen on Twitter: @SayDatAgain

The Black Delegation aquires…	The White Delegation acquires…
Dirk Nowitzki	Heidi Klum*
Madonna	Ice Cube
Ben Stiller	Terrell Owens
Kevin Love	Chris Paul**
Mitt Romney***	Eddie Long
Boston	(nothing)
Mark David Chapman	Conrad Murray
Daniel Tosh	Kevin Hart
Nicholas Cage	Wesley Snipes
Kelly Divine	Jada Fire
Adam Levine	Gabourey Sidibe
Fergie	Amber Rose
Cliff Bleszinski	Touré

NOTES
*Both sides agreed to reverse the Klum-Nowitzki trade from the first Race Trades Summit. bokeen is still surprised that Dirk was once officially black.
**This trade was executed on a provisional basis and will likely be reversed in one year (pending agreement of both delegations.)
***Mitt Romney will be returned to the white delegation after the 2016 presidential election. The whites keep Eddie Long forever.

For our listeners, by our listeners, part IV: bokeen apologizes!?!

bokeen — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 00:00:06 +0000

Once again, bokeen is in rare form during a feedback episode, this time delivering an extraordinarily rare apology to his Twitter followers. Then, he responds to listener comments, email and voicemails, and proposes an idea for a drunken excursion later this year. Of course, several ratchet voicemails from Chill are featured.

Confessions of a black NASCAR fan

bokeen — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 04:00:49 +0000

While the show has covered extinction in the past, this episode touches on a species that bokeen didn’t know existed: black NASCAR fans. Kareem from Sports, Sex and Sneakers joins the show to discuss his appreciating for auto racing, why NASCAR is much more than dudes driving around in circles, and how his enjoyment of NASCAR transcends racial stereotypes and allows him to connect with people he otherwise might not have anything in common with. Also, bokeen rants about painting his bedroom.

Check out Kareem’s podcast and blog, Sports Sex & Sneakers
Follow Kareem on Twitter: @SportsSexSneaks

bokeen’s Vegas adventure

bokeen — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 03:00:42 +0000

Shirley Huang, Esquire joins the show as bokeen recaps his recent business trip to Las Vegas. We discuss the depressing vibe that permeates Vegas, the unnecessary presence of hookers, enjoying the benefits of an open bar, interacting with a bitch-made dude and intimidating fellow travelers. In addition, bokeen explains the importance of treating a coworker like his prison bitch.

Eating healthy while travelling

bokeen — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 03:31:08 +0000

Health correspondent The Rob Show joins the show to advise bokeen in advance of his trip to Vegas next week. After dieting in a successful effort to lose weight and maximize his sexiness, bokeen is concerned about eating while on the road. Should he just say "fuck it" and temporarily abandon the diet? What are the best strategies when dining out with coworkers? Are there any fast food decisions that aren’t designed specifically for the obese? Rob answers all of these questions and many more in this short, scientific episode of Consumption Junction.

The single folks struggle

bokeen — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 02:00:19 +0000

Newly-single bokeen is joined by the perpetually-single CC to discuss the trials and tribulations of the Chicago dating scene. A morose cast of characters is featured in this episode, including Bloody Tampon Chick, Poop Pants Guy, Toilet Clogger Guy, Overly Affectionate Guy/Line Guy, and Christian Chick. bokeen also explains his newfound ability to make interesting women completely vanish.

Does the sports media favor white athletes?

bokeen — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 20:00:11 +0000

Rodimus Prime and Evan Barnes join the show to discuss the sports media’s attitudes towards race. The discussion begins with a debate about whether Steve Nash deserved his two MVP awards. We also discuss the media’s raging hardon for the whitest black quarterback ever, Tim Tebow, and white college basketball stars such as Adam Morrison and Jimmer Fredette. The conversation concludes with an analysis of Bill Simmons’ latent disrespect for black athletes.

Check out Rod’s podcast and blog: The Black Guy Who Tips
Follow Rod on Twitter: @rodimusprime
Follow Evan on Twitter: @evan_b
Check out Evan’s blog: Virgo Gumbo

For our listeners, by our listeners, part III: Chillmatic

bokeen — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 03:00:26 +0000

bokeen begins the episode by getting all emotional and shit, and explaining how the show will be changing moving forward. Then, he responds to listener feedback, including comments, emails, and a serious of hilarious voicemail messages from his new favorite listener.