Life Coaching Blog

The P.O.W.E.R to get your goals

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 03:26:00 +0000

The POWER model - a coaching model for creating a well formed outcome in service of you setting and getting your goals...

Over many years of consulting to organisations and coaching with Executives (& Leaders), we found that many organisational objectives, stakeholder KPIs, corporate and strategic plans, and even basic personal or shared goals are rarely realised in the way that they are envisaged or recorded.

Our experience has led us to understand that among the many reasons for this fact, one fundamental ingredient is the absence of well-formedness.

The following model forms part of every coaching session that a Coaching Room Coach delivers – as part of ensuring that we are being as effective as possible with every client we see.

The POWER to get your goals and objectives is laid out 5 simple, yet critical steps that give you the fundamental ingredients to a well-formed outcome.

Make your objectives:
POSITIVE – Is it something you want or really need?
OWNERSHIP – Can you initiate and maintain it yourself?
WHAT – What will look & feel like as you start to achieve it? Where, when and with whom?
ECOLOGY – Is the objective healthy and good for you & your people?
RESOURCES – Do you have the resources (internal and external) you need to achieve the objective?

The P.O.W.E.R TO GET YOUR GOALS

Purposefully Positive Priorities

Purposeful

You cannot get what you want until you know what it is.

You cannot get what you do not want, simply because you are actually already good at getting what you want! Everybody is.

You will not get what is not a priority to you.

Your goal is your goal because you want or need it - let other people's needs or wants of you - be there goals!
Need vs Want:

A significant factor in goal setting is being able to distinguish between what you need and what you want. Needs are usually survival or utility-based and wants are normally desire driven.

When we confuse what we want with what we need, we can lose and confuse our priorities (and our effectiveness) at setting and getting the most important goals and objectives.

An example would be a person needing the latest designer jeans and wanting to lose some weight!

DO YOU NEED WHAT YOU WANT - OR WANT WHAT YOU WANT?
DO YOU WANT WHAT YOU NEED - OR NEED WHAT YOU WANT?

Purposeful summary

Be clear on what you want and what you need when you are setting your goals, and be clear whether setting goals for what you want or what you need first will serve you best.

Positive

When you set a goal or objective, it needs to first and foremost to be stated in terms of what you want, not what you don’t want.

For example, a person that has had enough of smoking may set the goal of: ‘I don’t want to smoke anymore!’

Do you see or hear that they are a asking for something they don’t want - so they won’t get it! This is not a positive goal they can move toward but a negative one they are trying to move away from. Ironically, focusing on not wanting something keeps your attention on the thing you don’t want, and in the case of a smoker, the goal stated this way keeps them thinking about smoking!

This positively stated goal for a smoker could be more like:

• I want to be healthier.
• I want to have the money I spend on smoking to give my kids a holiday
and a smoke free home to live in.
• I would like to increase the chances of seeing my grandchildren grow
up.

Positive summary

What you want or need must be just that. Avoid using the words; don’t/should/must/stop/etc. in your goal statements.

Focus on what you will get, realise or have, that’s new and not on what you won’t have or do anymore. Try stating all your goals with what you will be doing, being or having differently.

Priorities and the 3W model.

Priorities; n. Precedence, especially established by order of importance or urgency.

Can you prioritise? Do you know what is a priority in your life? Are you setting
your goals based on what is a priority to getting the life you need or want?

The facts seem to be that most people just can’t, won’t or don’t prioritise what they need or want on their lives!

"Only about 5% of the population set and achieve their most important goals the other 95% of us work for this 5%". Anthony Robbins- Awakening the giant within

So what percentage do you fall into?

Priorities are about; what is important to YOU?

Use the following 3W formula to quality check your life and goals to make sure you are prioritising.

1. WHAT? - Write down what you are doing - intending - being or goals you have already set - here you want to write down as specific and clear as you can WHAT you are doing - being - intending etc.

2. WHY? - Ask yourself the following question about what you have just written; WHY am I doing that? Write the answer next to what you are doing etc.

3. WHY the WHY? - Now write down why is that why (the previous WHY) important?

You can now see that you get greater and greater clarity on the importance OR unimportance of what you are doing etc. Use this formula to prioritise all your future goals and check you existing ones.

Priority summary

Ensure you are working and setting your goals on what is most important to YOU. Ask yourself often why you are doing what you are doing and why is it important and what’s important about that?

Own-ership: n. Ownership esp. by a single person that is free of any encumbrances or limitations

1. Are your goals and objectives fully and completely within your own control? Do you have the power, full autonomy and ability to do what needs to be done and to happen for you to realise your goals?

2. Can you say that you exclusively OWN your goals, and you are not in partnership with one or many others that you are relying on to come through on your goal?

If you can say YES to both question 1 and 2 and you have already applied what you have read and learned here so far to your goals, then great move on to the next part!

If you answered NO to either or both question 1 or 2 it is likely that you need to break down your goal into smaller steps and stages. You are relying on others means that your goals is not within your own control. To try to realise it you must influence and direct others. Try being the operative word here, or you could say hope to realise it!

You can involve others in your goal, like for example needing a car sales person to sell you the car you set as a goal, yet not in the way of needing the car sales person to help you earn and save the money!

Ownership summary

To get your goals and to experience the success and confidence of realising your goals, it has to be you that gets them, when you look out at someone to thank for helping you get your goals the first thing you should need and really the last thing you should need is a mirror! OWN your goals own the success own the results!

Wonder

Can you access a state of wonder? Do you remember when you were a child and the next morning was Christmas or your birthday? Go back there right now - where were you? In bed? Somewhere else? Was it Christmas or a birthday, do you remember, do you have a sense of being there right now, what was the room like that you were in? was it dark or bright, big or small, are you seeing what you saw, feeling what you felt, hearing what you heard?

Great… What were some of the questions you had in mind? When will it be morning?
What will I be getting? Who else will be there? Can you feel the excitement and anticipation right now? What did you imagine, maybe what your pile of present may look like, what told you in your environment that this exciting and special occasion was about to happen?

When you got there, it was very similar, maybe even better to how you had been wondering, wasn’t it… happy times!

Well, nothing has changed, particularly with goal setting and goal getting, so here are the slightly more grown up questions you need to keep asking yourself and answering for yourself, even though you may not be exactly right, at least you are wondering:

1. When will I realise this goal, how far away is it?
2. What will the goal look like, sound like, and feel like when I have it?
3. How will I know I have it?
4. Who will I have it with, who will be there?
5. Where will I be?
6. Am I moving toward my goal- how do I know?
7. What else can I wonder about my goal?

Wonder summary

To wonder is to create in advance of knowing, the importance of nearly knowing is what keeps you on track, imagine driving without any idea where you are going or what the scenery and landmarks are that let you know that you are headed in the best possible direction.

We’ve all wondered as children with incredible ability, nothing has changed other than maybe you have stopped wondering for a while… Start again today as you set your new goals.

Ecology: n. The wellbeing of living things, their environment, and the relationship between the two.

You have probably heard the saying’ be careful what you wish for, you just might get it!’ Well goal setting and getting is very similar, with every gain there in inevitably loss.

If you gain a trimmer figure you often lose the use of your current wardrobe of clothes, if you get more business and earn more money- usually means you lose time some of your free time or time with your loved ones. So there are several questions to ask about your goals:

1. What will the gain be from getting this goal (write it down)
2. What are the possible losses that I will experience (time, clothes,
family, relationships etc.) write it down
3. What are the advantages of getting this goal
4. What are the risk associated with this goal
5. What could I sabotage my success with if I don’t consider it
6. Is every part of me fully aligned with the gains and subsequent losses
involved in getting this goal
7. Do I have any internal objections

Being fully aware and aligned with your intentions and the following actions and gains and losses are critical to the success and sustainability of goal getting.

Ecology also calls forth another facet of ourselves, our ability to be ruthlessly
honest with ourselves! Can you be ruthlessly honest with yourself when you are asking these questions?

Ecology summary

One, if not the, most important aspect of goal Setting and getting is considering all the variables in all aspect of your life and being internally truthful with your alignment to realising them;

ASK THE QUESTIONS! BE HONEST! ENJOY THE RESULTS!

Resourced for Results

Are you resourced to get the result you need or want? Do you have what it takes? What else do you need to access internally or externally to make sure you get the result of achieving your goals?

1. Can you actually take the actions needed to get your goals and dreams?
2. Do you have a plan with specific steps and stages?
3. Can you give the necessary factors to realise your goals;- time- money effort etc.?
4. Can you hold yourself totally accountable to what you promise yourself or do you need an accountability buddy? Do you have one?
5. How are you going to measure your progress, do you have the resources to measure and take stock of your progress? What might
you need? A journal? Greater awareness and Intentionality?
6. What other resources do you have to have to help you get your goal? Do you need to see it? Do you have photos or pictures or drawings?
7. What could stop you from getting your goals? What resources do you need to put in place to prevent this happening?

Conclusion

In conclusion, once you have applied all the other aspect of this goal setting and goal getting technologies, this Resourced for Results section is the beginning!

It starts here, if you don’t have or cannot access the internal or external resources to realise your goal then it will not happen, so, this part is the process is the beginning once you have come to the end of all the other parts.

It is now time to put the rubber on the road, get some skin in the game! How exciting.

GOOD FORTUNE TO YOU

Coach Training
Coaching Training
Coaching Certification
Become a Life Coach
Life Coach Training

Do you need a life coach?

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 09:23:00 +0000

Do you really need a coach?

By Joseph Scott of The Coaching Room

The 'why work with a coach?' question is most often (in my view) driven by the frame of reference of 'what can a coach do that I can’t do by myself?'.

Well, my view is this, if you can be and do the following 7 things with and by yourself, you don't need a coach.

However, if you cannot do all of the following, and you want to ‘be or do’ things differently, be better, move to a higher place or move faster etc. Then I suggest you get yourself a coach. Take a look!

The 7 things a coach can facilitate that you my not currently be able to do, be or see. Can you:

1. Hear and detect your own limiting beliefs? These are the beliefs that hold you back from achieving your potential. Can you hear and understand the distortions in your own self talk that leash you to your current reality?

2. See and understand your own (self-reflexive) consciousness as you create (positive and) toxic frames of mind from which you deal with reality? Can you master them so that you can self-author your own life story, over the one you’ve inherited from others?

3. Apply actual change to your life that is systemic and lasting?

4. Hold yourself fully accountable to empirical benchmarks of performance and development?

5. Engage yourself in actualising your own development, across recognised psychological aspects of self, to live and operate at better states and stages of being?

6. Perform your meanings and mean your performances, as you realise and release your innate propulsion (motivation) system toward achieving your fullest potentials?

7. Ask yourself a range of simple questions that allow you to live beyond scarcity & deficiency, into a place of giving and abundance?

If you can say yes to the above, YOU DON’T NEED A COACH.

If you cannot say yes to all the above, and self development, transformation and performance both personally and professionally are important to you and you intend this… Then my advice is to GET A COACH!.

If you already have a coach and with your coach, you are not experiencing the above, GET A DIFFERENT COACH.

For more information on how The Coaching Room can help you, your team or your organisation, call us on 1300 858 089 or use our handy contact form. We’ll call you back quickly, listen to your needs and together work through what we can do to help you get what you need or want.

The Go-Giver - A powerful little book about achieving your goals through giving

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 11:46:00 +0000

Hey, Jay here,

I happened on a most powerful little book called The Go-Giver. The Go-Giver tells the story of an ambitious young man named Joe who yearns for success. Joe is a true go-getter, though sometimes it seems the harder and faster he works, the further away his goals seem to be. Joe seeks advice from a guy named Pindar, a legendary consultant referred to as the Chairman. Over the next week Pindar introduces Joe to a series of Go-Givers (the 5 laws of stratespheric success through giving to others). Joe learns that by changing his focus from getting to giving - putting others interests first and continually adding value to their lives - leads to unexpected returns.

This is a delightfully easy book to read and the message it offers is remarkable.

You can get the book here if it appeals.

Jay

Life Coaching | How Coaching Works

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 08:19:00 +0000

Hi there,

This is a wonderful video about how Life Coaching works. It's a subtle and quite delightful story.

The Coaching Room is a World Class Coaching organisation offering Life Coaching Sydney, Life Coaching Brisbane, Life Coaching Melbourne and Life Coaching Gold Coast.

Regards, Jay

Life Coaching | The importance of Beliefs and Values in personal change

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 07:38:00 +0000

Hey Jay here,

I received the following email from a guy called Chris Howard - about change. Even though we cover all of this in our Life Coaching programs, I thought it was a really good overview of how our beliefs and values affect our outcomes. I hope that you enjoy it as much as I did.

We've all been told that, "what you don't know can't hurt you."
Actually, just the opposite is true! What you don’t know not only can hurt you,
it can damage your relationships, your health...and your success potential.

Limiting beliefs and negative emotions that lie latent in the unconscious mind,
not dealt with from the past, can serve as powerful internal obstacles to your
most desired goals.

Negative emotions are often where "bad habits" originate, habitual
behaviours that stop you in your tracks. Anxiety or overwhelm, for example, can
lead to procrastinating on a project, which can ultimately make the difference
between getting a promotion or losing a job.

If these out-dated thought patterns never have the chance to see the light of
day, they just leave you wondering, Why did I avoid that person who could've
helped me? Why didn't I pursue that opportunity? Why didn't I do what I said I
was going to do?

Why let your past determine your future? Living with old programming is like
operating with old "software" that can't manage your new, bigger
dreams and desires. You will continue to crash or make painfully slow progress
until you install a new, updated system.

How can you tell if you are self-sabotaging?

The #1 indicator is repeating unwanted patterns, such as unfulfilled goals, frustrating partnerships and
failed ventures.

Do you set out on weight-loss programs then yo-yo back to your old weight as
soon as you see yourself making progress? Does it seem you have your own glass
ceiling in terms of your income never going past a certain point? Do you make
positive changes in your habits only to find yourself predictably slipping back
to old ways?

Frustration and confusion can be hard habits to break...UNTIL you're ready for
a breakthrough! Real change can happen in an instant. The instant you are
willing to:

1. Discover the root cause of your current circumstance or condition; and

2. Replace those old limited decisions with greater possibilities for your life

THAT is the moment you can really soar! What would it actually feel like to be
free?

What will it cost you if you don't take action now?

Change only happens when you make a commitment to follow through and step up.

Consider what will happen to your life if you don't follow through with your
commitment.

Where will you be in 3 months time? Six months? One year?...

What will it cost you in unfulfilled dreams, or your health, physical vitality,
relationships or your financial life?

What do you want your life to be like physically, emotionally, financially and
spiritually in 3 months, six months, one year and 3 years from now?

Will you be working in a job or business you are passionate about and
surrounded my loving friends and family, enjoying vital health, financial
independence and loving your life?

Become your own great success story and remember... if something is humanly
possible it's possible for you.

The Coaching Room specialises in life coaching for people in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane and the Gold Coast.

Best regards, Jay

Business Coaching Sydney, Brisbane, Melbourne and The Gold Coast | Services Overview

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Sat, 09 May 2009 13:04:00 +0000

Hey, Jay here,

I have downloaded our latest Business Coaching Services overview from Slide Share. It reveals important stuff like the areas we cover in our Business Coaching programmes, as well as recent client evaluations, coaching outcomes etc.

Great for people new to the world of Business Coaching or those that wish to look at Business Coaching in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane and the Gold Coast:

The Coaching Room | Business Coaching Overview

View more OpenOffice presentations from thecoachingroom.

Life Coaching Services Sydney, Brisbane and the Gold Coast - an overview of what we cover in our life coaching program

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Sat, 09 May 2009 12:21:00 +0000

Hey, Jay here,

I have downloaded our latest Life Coaching overview from Slide Share. It reveals important stuff like the things we cover in a life coaching program, recent client evaluations, coaching outcomes etc.

Great for people new to the world of coaching or those that wish to seek Life Coaching Services:

The Coaching Room | Life Coaching Powerpoint Overview

View more OpenOffice presentations from thecoachingroom.

Life Coaching Videos | Meta Coaching Videos

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Fri, 01 May 2009 10:10:00 +0000

Hey, Jay here,

Below are some Neuro-Semantic Life Coaching Videos that I highly recommend. These feature Dr L. Michael Hall - Co-Founder of the society of Neoro Semantics and The Meta Coach Foundation.

Life Coaching | Think Big Manifesto | Review

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 03:12:00 +0000

Hey Jay Here,

Recently, I came across an author called Michael Port, who has but one
itty-bitty, teeny-tiny infinitesimal goal: to make the world a better place and life worth living for all people.

As a Life Coach, I share this goal and I imagine you do too.

The book is called the Think Big Manifesto, It's excellent. One Chapter into it and I was thoroughly inspired. It grabbed me. This is a true manifesto - compelling and challenging. A MUST read for EVERYONE.

Below is a link to where you can find the Think Big Manifesto on Amazon. Below that is a product review from Amazon (for more info about the book).

Product Description for the Think Big Manifesto from Amazon.com

Think Bigger. About Who You Are. And What You Offer the World.

Stand for something before someone stands on you. Revolt against the play-it-safe, don't disturb the peace, cynical and silenced society that, more often than not, buries big thoughts.

Michael Port, bestselling author of Think Big Revolution, knows it's not always easy to think big. But big thinking must happen now; today, tomorrow, and forevermore.

At this very moment, you are the change you want to see in the world—should you choose to accept personal responsibility. Devour every word of The Think Big Manifesto. It is the handbook to your personal revolution.

You are more than you know. And you can do more with less than you think...

* Unhook from the guru track

* Learn how to be comfortable with discomfort

* Join people doing powerful things

* Be one of the big thinkers that others rave about

This book, and life, is not a conceptual, theoretical experiment in how to do big things. No, this is just what you need if you're on, or want to be on, the path to doing big things and are willing to invest in your future.

Join or incite a worldwide revolution that inspires others to follow. All it takes is one big thought and the revolution is unleashed. One thought, one person at a time, quickly followed by another—soon big thinking becomes the norm. Your big thoughts enable you to achieve greatness, be remarkable, and create a better world.

Are you a member of the Think Big Revolution? If so, this is your Manifesto.

From the Inside Flap

Every year, millions of people fall victim to a debilitating disease—a disease that cripples careers, destroys relationships, and undermines the health and happiness of the entire world. This disease is responsible for poverty, crime, war, natural disasters, and our economic ills. It has had no name until now—it's called small thinking. Its hallmarks are a failure of imagination and a disbelief in human possibility.

In The Think Big Manifesto, Michael Port calls you, and the world, to action by offering a simple solution to a serious syndrome. Think big, commit to quantum change, envision your future, climb your mountains, and incite the revolution our society needs—if it is to survive.

But it takes a personal revolution to stop accepting what is and start energetically creating what is possible. You can't wait until later to do big things. It's up to you to achieve your dreams, to head in the right direction, and to keep your focus. If you think you've waited too long, that there's no point anyway, or that it's too late—that's just small thinking.

But even the most talented and self-confident among us often forget to think big. It's not always easy to do. That's why The Think Big Manifesto is not your average motivational guide. In these pages are ten fundamental principles for thinking big and a personal code of conduct for changing the way you approach the world—today. The time has come. Port urges you not to sit back, hesitate, or wait. He awakens your big-thinking self. He stirs the contagious, catalytic power of once dormant big thoughts that are now ready to be released. He asks you to look inward, outward, and upward—to think bigger about who you are and what you offer the world.

The Think Big Manifesto is about changing every aspect of your life—from the way you work to the way you relate to friends, family, and community. With real examples that inspire and inform—like the high school dropout who built a $100 million business or the hedge fund manager who became an organic dairy farmer—The Think Big Manifesto isn't only about thinking big in your career, but about your very place in the world.

Are you ready to lead the change you wish to see in the world? Your Think Big Revolution starts right here, right now—with you.

I highly recommend this book, it's a Life changing read.

The Think Big Manifesto: Think You Can't Change Your Life (and the World)? Think Again

As always, I hope this helps!

Jay

Life Coaching - Best books for 2009

noreply@blogger.com (www.thecoachingroom.com.au) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 05:47:00 +0000

Hey, Jay here,

I have been asked by many of my clients recently for a good book list for 2009. Here is this year's must read list and some handy links to Amazon for each title. Please let me know what you think of my 12 for this year or perhaps add your own list!

1. January: I could do anything - If only I knew what it was - by Barbara Sher

A great read for anyone wanting to find their passion. Barbara Sher offers the reader a step-by-step guide to finding more meaning, direction and joy specifically in your career.

2. February: The Power of Now - by Eckhart Tolle

The Power of Now is written to help the reader get the most out of every single moment of life. This is a great text to help you manage anxiety and get more out of every experience. A great basis from which to start the year.

3. March: Getting it Together - by Noel Whittaker

A simple but effective guide to unlocking your financial potential. Aimed at young people, this is equally applicable to all age groups and in particular small business owners. It's an absolute pearler. Having met Noel in 2005, I can vouch for his wonderful and curious mind. I urge all those out there who would like to attain financial independence to read this book as part of your journey.

4. April: Figuring Out People - by Dr L Michael Hall

This book is aimed at helping the reader to better understand their own (and other's) unconscious drive and motivation. Why do we do the things we do? Why don't we always behave we want to behave? Find out in this wonderful text from Dr L. Michael Hall

5. May: Frogs into Princes - by Richard Bandler and John Grinder

This is an absolute timeless classic. Recommended by Daniel Goleman as the best emerging discipline "A readable, practical, and entertaining book about a challenging, original and promising new discipline. I recommend it."

6. June: Time For a Change - by Richard Bandler

A self guide to change. Bandler is audacious, hilarious and practical in this wonderful and informative text. Bandler looks at beliefs, self hypnosis and therapy in a brand new light - A highly recommended read!

7. July: See Jane Lead - 99 way for women to take charge at work - by Lois P Frankel

For women who want to empower themselves through their career, there is no better guide available today. While this book is written for women who want to unlock their leadership potential, it is equally pertinent to men who want to nurture and grow their leadership potential. In fact, there are some concepts and elements that are a must read here for men as well as women.

8. August: Systems Sensitive Leadership - by Michael C Armour & Don Browning

While the content of this book is about empowering diversity without polarising the church, the lessons here are easily transferable to any organisation or institution. Mike Armour brings to life Claire Graves values systems methodology. A must read for leaders or the leader within.

9. September: Whale Done - by Ken Blanchard

A wonderful story (metaphor) about the lessons of great leadership, whether you are leading in business, parenthood or life. A delightful read.

.
10. October: The E-Myth (revisited) - by Michael Gerber

For those of us who dream of starting and running our own business - this book is an absolute must. Michael is a genius and through this wonderful text, will save you thousands of hours of time and thousands of dollars with his practical business advice.

11. November: E-Myth Mastery - by Michael Gerber

Take the next steps and master the learnings (the how) of the E-Myth (revisited). Master your financial systems, your marketing and sales systems, your people systems and so on and so forth.

12. December: Unleashed - A guide to your ultimate self-actualisation - by Dr L Michael Hall

Celebrate Christmas with this guide to unleashing your potential. Everybody talks about self-actualisation, but how does it actually work and what can we do to actualise our potential? A must read!

Suggestions for Reading:

1. Buy a book of post-it tags and tag all the references and pages that stand out for you (so you can easily return to them at another time)
2. At the end of each chapter take the time to stop and note how you can apply the points made my the author
3. Consider purchasing downloadable books (say to your iPod). You can then listen to your books while working out or on the train or bus etc.
4. Review the author on Google or YouTube and see if you can find videos or other references about what he or she has done in the past.
5. Start up a blog about your favourite author and share your experience of their texts with others!

As always, I hope this helps

Life Coaching and Career Coaching