tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651Wed, 11 Sep 2024 22:12:07 +0000Take a break, have a laugh and share it with friends. Got a good one yourself? Do share with me! Cheers ... Norman (you can subscribe using email or RSS so that you'll get all new postings)http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (Norm)Blogger28125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-5472907640879118962Sat, 28 Aug 2010 11:39:00 +00002010-08-28T04:39:44.804-07:00I asked God for a bike, but I know he doesn't work that way.. . . . So I stole it and asked for forgiveness.http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2010/08/how-to-get-bike-from-god.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-3998784039218504404Thu, 02 Jul 2009 03:59:00 +00002009-07-01T21:03:56.780-07:00Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it. Don't waste it on exercise.Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer. That's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster.Want to live longer? Take a nap. Q: Should I cut down on meat and http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/07/eating-healthy.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-6350724454434080495Tue, 30 Jun 2009 00:45:00 +00002009-06-29T17:45:56.683-07:00  Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.   What makes life 100%? Want to know the secret? If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/06/who-ever-said-you-can-give-100.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-7403655187466852975Tue, 30 Jun 2009 00:33:00 +00002009-06-29T17:40:06.311-07:00 The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there, and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/06/what-we-learn-from-movies.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-586847103596916922Sun, 28 Jun 2009 16:14:00 +00002009-06-29T17:37:43.868-07:00NASA discovered that there are times it is most effective to have a writing instrument even in the most "high tech" environment they are in. Unfortunately, ball-point pen and markers just does not work in space because they depend on gravity. Therefore NASA initiated a project to invent an alternative writing instrument and thus called upon a number of top Scientists and allocated a http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/06/writing-in-space.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-5779680773841807170Fri, 19 Jun 2009 16:12:00 +00002009-06-19T09:12:29.783-07:00 http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/06/why-taking-drug-is-not-good-idea.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-173017779551287397Wed, 10 Jun 2009 18:39:00 +00002009-06-19T08:30:36.678-07:00  from http://www.youtube.com/normanchoo http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/06/have-you-had-your-exercise-today.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-2980585607108255536Tue, 19 May 2009 16:02:00 +00002009-06-19T08:33:51.495-07:00An elderly man, 82, just returned from the doctors only to find he didn't have long to live. So he summoned the three most important people in his life to tell them of his fate: 1. His Doctor 2. His Priest 3. His Lawyer He said, "Well, today I found out I don't have long to live. So, I have summoned you three here, because you are the most important people in my life, and I need to askhttp://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/05/dying-wish.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-4662932300223775477Sun, 10 May 2009 14:54:00 +00002009-06-19T08:35:01.440-07:00A woman noticed an old man rocking in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long happy life?" "I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day," he said. "I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise." "That's amazing," said the woman, "how old are http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/05/happy-old-man.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-977332206620221292Sun, 03 May 2009 19:01:00 +00002009-06-19T08:37:55.431-07:00By the time the soldier pulled into the little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere", he pleaded with a proprietor. "Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, but he is an Air Force guy" admitted the manager, “and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/05/room-sharing.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-5733666833477954146Fri, 17 Apr 2009 14:41:00 +00002009-06-19T08:39:51.890-07:00An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer — you're in the wrong place." So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning, flush http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/engineer-sent-to-hell.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-5336616665026441618Fri, 17 Apr 2009 14:38:00 +00002009-06-19T08:41:02.738-07:00A man found a magic genie who would grant him one wish. The man said to the genie,” I wish that I had a non-stop bridge from here to Hawaii." The genie said,” I’m sorry, but that's going to be very hard. Do you have another wish?" The man answered, "Of course! I want the power to understand all women." The genie thought for a minute. He replied, "How many platforms http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/make-wish.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-8220227970324692891Fri, 17 Apr 2009 14:29:00 +00002009-06-19T08:42:11.078-07:00A student comes to a young professor's office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam," she says. She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean," she whispers, "I would do anything..." He returns her gaze, "Anything?" "Anything.&http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/will-do-anything.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-7294479071904119229Sun, 12 Apr 2009 13:28:00 +00002009-06-19T08:42:59.461-07:00An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. So he went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman came back in a month to the doctor for a scheduled check-up and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased you can hear again.&http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/hearing-aids.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-8462783242691641470Sun, 12 Apr 2009 13:17:00 +00002009-06-19T08:45:06.424-07:00At a fabric store, a pretty girl spots a nice material for a dress and asks the male clerk: How much does it costs? “Only one kiss per yard,” replied the male clerk with a smirk. “That’s fine,” said the girl. I’ll take ten yards.” With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, and then teasingly held it out. The girl http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/buying-fabric.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-5625161674714518026Sun, 12 Apr 2009 13:02:00 +00002009-06-19T08:46:11.160-07:00Three buddies died in a car crash, and they find themselves at the pearly gates. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you? The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was the greatest doctor of my time, and a great family man." The second guy says, "I would http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/at-pearly-gates.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-8744439170952411481Sun, 12 Apr 2009 13:00:00 +00002009-06-19T08:47:43.144-07:001. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" 2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" 3. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. 4. Sell Girl Scout cookies. 5. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/fun-things-to-do-in-elevator.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-7051713451401301469Sun, 12 Apr 2009 12:23:00 +00002009-06-19T08:48:21.899-07:00Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them. http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/medical-enhancement.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-2926720038877367570Sun, 12 Apr 2009 12:22:00 +00002009-06-19T08:49:12.673-07:00Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/liquid-viagra.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-9163458724857147126Sun, 12 Apr 2009 12:19:00 +00002009-06-19T08:50:15.574-07:00In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/drug-names.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-7415002559719163190Sun, 12 Apr 2009 00:54:00 +00002009-04-11T17:54:52.805-07:00A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a“Living Will”"Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all the beer.http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/will-writing.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-2203565197937339188Sun, 12 Apr 2009 00:53:00 +00002009-06-19T08:51:25.542-07:00A neurotic is the person who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the person who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is the person who collects the rent. http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/psychiatrist.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-2401665975871401108Sun, 12 Apr 2009 00:46:00 +00002009-06-19T08:54:11.417-07:00The following 15 comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country. Count down to #1... #15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while." # 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." #13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." #12 &http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/police.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-9057433318627995056Sun, 12 Apr 2009 00:40:00 +00002009-06-19T09:00:10.718-07:00What makes Chinese-CHINESE? Please check the list to see how Chinese you or your friends really are. There are 29 ways to know if you're Chinese. You will laugh at yourself when you read all of them. 1. You unwrap gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those ribbons). 2. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/chinese.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1725300219264549651.post-4203064539473659113Sun, 12 Apr 2009 00:31:00 +00002009-06-19T09:01:27.182-07:00Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, Holmes said:” Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see?" Watson said, "I see millions and millions of stars." Holmes: "And what does that tell you?" Watson: "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. http://norm-have-a-laugh.blogspot.com/2009/04/sherlock-and-watson.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Norm)0