Life is Like That ! !

The Legendary Lungi

2010-09-07T22:03:00.004+05:30

Just as the national bird of Kerala is Mosquito, her national dress is 'Lungi'. Pronounced as 'Lu' as in loo and 'ngi ' as in 'mongey', a lungi can be identified by its floral or window-curtain pattern. 'Mundu' is the white variation of lungi and is worn on special occasions like hartal or bandh days, weddings and Onam.

Lungi is simple and 'down to earth' like the mallu wearing it. Lungi is the beginning and the end of evolution in its category.You cant provide it with gills to allow it to breathe more freely .Wearing something on the top half of your body is optional when you are wearing a lungi. Lungi is a strategic dress. It's like a one-size-fits-all bottoms for Keralites.

The technique of wearing a lungi/mundu is passed on from generation to generation through word of mouth like the British Constitution. If you think it is an easy task wearing it, just try it once! It requires techniques like breath control and yoga that is a notch higher than sudarshan kriya of AOL. A lungi/mundu when perfectly worn won't come off even in a quake of 8 on the richter scale. A lungi is not attached to the waist using duct tape, staple, rope or velcro. It's a bit of mallu magic whose formula is a closely guarded secret like the Coca Cola chemicals.

A lungi can be worn 'Full Mast' or 'Half Mast' like a national flag. A 'Full Mast' lungi is when you are showing respect to an elderly or the dead. Wearing it at full mast has lots of disadvantages. A major disadvantage is when a dog runs after you. When you are wearing a lungi/mundu at full mast, the advantage is mainly for the female onlookers who are spared the ordeal of swooning at the sight of hairy legs.

Wearing a lungi 'Half Mast' is when you wear it exposing yourself like those C grade movie starlets. A mallu can play cricket, football or simbly run when the lungi is worn at half mast. A mallu can even climb a coconut tree wearing lungi in half mast. "It's not good manners, especially for ladies from decent families, to look up at a mallu climbing a coconut tree"- Confucius (or is it Abdul Kalam?)

Most mallus do the traditional dance kudiyattam. Kudi means drinking alcohol and yattam, spelled as aattam, means random movement of the male body. Note that 'y' is silent. When you are drinking, you drink, there is no 'y'. Any alcohol related "festival" can be enjoyed to the maximum when you are topless with lungi and a towel tied around the head. "Half mast lungi makes it easy to dance and shake legs" says Candelaria Amaranto, a Salsa teacher from Spain after watching 'kudiyaattam' .

The 'Lungi Wearing Mallu Union' [LUWMU, pronounced LOVE MU], an NGO which works towards the 'upliftment' of the lungi, strongly disapprove of the GenNext tendency of wearing Bermudas under the lungi. Bermudas under the lungi is a conspiracy by the CIA. It's a disgrace to see a person wearing burmuda with corporate logos under his lungi. What they don't know is how much these corporates are limiting their freedom of movement and ex-pression.

A mallu wears lungi round the year, all weather, all season. A mallu celebrates winter by wearing a colourful lungi with a floral pattern. Lungi provides good ventilation and brings down the heat between legs. A mallu is scared of global warming more than anyone else in the world.

A lungi/mundu can be worn any time of the day/night. It doubles as blanket at night. It also doubles up as a swing, swimwear, sleeping bag, parachute, facemask while entering/exiting toddy shops, shopping basket and water filter while fishing in ponds and rivers. It also has recreational uses like in 'Lungi/mundu pulling', a pastime in households having more than one male member. Lungi pulling competitions are held outside toddy shops all over Kerala during Onam and Vishu. When these lungis are decommissioned from service, they become table cloths. Thus the humble lungi is a cradle to grave appendage.

(The credit for this article goes to the author, unknown as of now. I'm sharing this in my blog for your information and knowledge enrichment.)

For more information on Mallu, and what that means, please read i-yaame-mallu

The Pursuit of Happyness

2010-08-15T11:16:00.003+05:30

"Hey, there needs to be a spell check done", was the first reaction that I had when I saw the movie title. It said Happyness, and not Happiness.

Sometime I wonder the change in scenario; where a studious student during my times was having all set of dictionaries - English-English, English-English-Hindi, English-English-Malayalam and all sorts of combinations. We were encouraged (rather threatened) to look up these heafty stuff to find the correct spelling and meaning. So we knew most of the spelling correctly. But this generation just hits the spell-check button and bingo all the wrong spellings are corrected and also the system throws up the suggestion for grammar too. So the result is, if you have to write down something in a paper, the student is blank regarding the spelling.

The point I was trying to tell is, the movie is good. And, I'm not trying to give a review of that. What left me thinking is that, what made that guy to rise up in life? Money? Wealth? Luxury? (By the way, money and wealth are two different things).

My earlier boss used to tell me, "Money is the only motivator for most of them". I look back. Did I work with all the enthusiasm just because I got the money I wanted? Mostly, No.

Money is an attraction, but cannot be a motivator, I believe. When somebody takes up a new job offer, money, of course, is an attraction. Once inside and on the job, the attraction remains for sometime. But after sometime he/she gets used to it, and its no more an attraction or motivation.

The driving factors might be a sense of satisfaction of doing something good, some recognition of good work, promotion, etc. Some folks may not be so focused on the satisfaction part, as long as the month-end sms comes from the bank. But here too, its not motivation, its complacency.

Another breed just cannot stand the concept that you are working 'for' someone, and starts up something new which gives him/her a kick. May be 5% have this mindset, but only 0.5% get ahead and do something. Others do a SWOT analysis, and finally decide to stick on to the month-end sms lifestyle.

Here, one thing to note is that all have some wishes, desires and dreams.

All of us have lot of wishes - like, "I wish this country had better infrastructure", "I wish I had XYZ car", "I wish I had a monthly income of Rs. ABC".

If you ask them very firmly, "Do you really want all these things?", they might answer, "Well, not really. I am okay with the current setup". They are driven by the fear of failure and since they are not ready to move out of the comfort zone, they remain where they are with their wishes.

A few in this group think of doing something about it. They analyse the pros and cons, see what they could possibly do, and see a few options. They are turning a wish into a higher level - a desire. But many stop at this level, due to the lack of confidence, complacency, or no proper guidance.

Very few actually turn these desires into their dreams, set goals, and chart an action plan to achieve them. And they make a difference to their own life, and to life of people who are associated with them.

What I felt is that its not important what the dreamers achieve, whether it is a plush house, a few luxury cars, or a hefty bank account. If the person is focused, and sensible, it is more important on what he/she, as an individual, as human being, become in that process of achieving his dreams.

If we look around we will see people in all the categories, and which set do each of us belong to?

Cheers!

The clutter free life

2010-08-09T23:37:00.000+05:30

Bang!! I turned around and saw a huge pile of junk being dumped in the junk shop. It was a pleasent evening and I had got out for a walk. This thought stuck my mind - A shop for junk stuff.

It made me realise that anything sells! Also that all of us have lot of junk to give - both in our house and mind. There are tens and thousands of thoughts that cross our mind, and if you observe, only a few thoughts comes again. Most of them are not relevant at all, but stays somewhere in the background of our mind. Same is the case with things. Look around our house, and if you look closely you will realise that most of the stuff around us are not used or ages. There might be bits of papers, used bus or train tickets, notices all are lying around us.

Clutter is common. You find it everywhere. People love it. Be it house, public place, office, mind. We feel something is very important and keep it; or just neglect it saying its unimportant. I made it a habit to hit the Delete & Refresh button very often in my life and mind. Remove all those unwanted stuff from your life physically and mentally. Then you will see that a new life comes, a new energy. Think about it. If you have not used a particular stuff in your house for past 6 months, then mostly you will never use it. There is something fresh and new awaiting but unless we hit the Delete and Refresh button, the new stuff won't happen.

And I reached home to find that I am yet to hit the Delete and Refresh button for my mind for that day. Want to know how? Ask me.

Cheers!

Gokarna, Idigunji, Murudeshwar and Kollur

2009-12-04T19:32:00.022+05:30

It was a pretty long wait at the Jayanagar 4th Block pick-up point for theVRL Roadlines. The bus that I had booked to Gokarna was a sleeper cum sitting. I had opted for the sitting option being a little worried about the sleeping option. Gokarna had only bus option from Bangalore, no direct train, or else take a flight to Goa and head back to Gokarna via road, about a couple of hours I guess.

Gokarna is a sleepy little town in the coastal Karnataka but a famous place due to two things. Temple and beaches. The Shiva temple is considered to be very special due to the Jyothir lingam of Shiva. And the beaches are clean and isolated by rocks and hills.

More than 30 min of waiting and couple of frowns from Janaki, we were inside the bus. The intensity of frowns got stronger when we realised that the sleeping option was better as it looked more spacious and comfortable. I somehow 'tried' justifying my choice of sitting option and left Jayanagar by around 8.30 pm. When it left Bangalore it was almost past 10 pm.

It was around 9.30 next morning when we finally reached the little town. Got down and was picked up by the vehicle of Om beach Resort where I had booked for the stay. I had been to Gokarna about 6-7 years back and had known that there were few hotels. This time I wanted to have more beaches also along with the divinity in the trip, and so Om beach resort was chosen.

Little did I know that the 'beach' term in that name was a misnomer. The Om beach was pretty far, around 4kms from the resort. I had got a hint from the website I had visited so not very disappointing. Resort was pretty good, and had to hurry for breakfast as it was about to close by 10am. Food was good and had a quick nap after food. At around 4 pm we visited the Om beach. The resort had a drop and pick-up facility to the beach for the guests. It was drizzling and later the shower was strong.

There are about 5 beaches in Gokarna. Kudle, Om, Paradise, Town, and Long beach. All these are separated by hillocks. These beaches are frequented by foreigners who come to camp in here. There are several cafes (don’t have high expectations, it’s too far from Cafe Coffee Day and stuff like that. These are simple coconut-leaf roofed, semi-brick buildings where they offer basic food and shelter).

We strolled along the beach which was almost deserted. The sea was calm and I took bath and we both meditated for a while on the rocks. It was so nice, that the mind automatically comes to the present moment and no thoughts disturb you.

By around 6.30 pm we headed back to resort in the same vehicle of resort (again, don’t have high expectation, it is not a limo that comes but a cranky Mahindra jeep which probably was the first one from Mahindra.) A quick shower and we planned to go to the temple. The auto-rickshaws charge a bomb there. For a 2 km trip they charge around Rs. 50!! With no option left we opted for an auto to the temple for Rs. 100 for round trip + waiting.

Incidentally it was Maha-Pradosham or Sani-Pradosham which was considered to be very auspicious to visit Shiva temple. There was no much rush, and as soon as we reached a priest (there are many sub/assistant/deputy priests) came to us and started taking inside the temple as if we had asked him to be there. I ignored him as I knew that there are such people who come uninvited and make us do all sorts of so called pujas and finally give us a bill which has many zeros in it. To avoid that I told, in the Kannada I knew, that we are fine alone. We made some donations to the temple, and took a ticket for a small puja which we could do alone. Some other priest came and made us do the puja, and it was nice as there was less crowd and we could touch the Shiva linga, which is one speciality of this place, that we can do the puja on our own. Back to auto, and back to resort for dinner and hit the bed.

We had booked a cab to Kollur. Since there were a couple of temples Idagunji and Murudeshwar on the way, we visited them too. Idagunji is an old Ganapati temple about 4km away from the highway. Murudeshwar is a beach temple town, much like Gokarna. Its is more famous for the World's largest Shiva statue. The temple is on a beach and has a resort like feeling in the temple premises. There are beaches on both sides where water sports are in full swing.

We had a quick lunch and then hopped in to head towards Kollur, and reached Kollur by around 2.30 pm.

This was the first leg of the 2 weeks trip that we had during the 2nd week of November. Watch this space for more.

Long Time!!

2009-10-21T19:11:00.003+05:30

Woooh!! 5 months! Its been long time since I posted anything.

Films release and flop or become hit in 5 months.
Countries go on war, and return to peace in 5 months.
People jump multiple jobs in 5 months.
Mosquitoes take birth, die and again take birth (may be as a mosquito again or not, not sure) in 5 months. (FYI: The average life span of a female mosquito is 3 to 100 days; the male lives 10 to 20 days.)
Marriages are made and broken in 5 months.
Companies are born and go broke in 5 months.

But still here I am, not writing anything for 5 months. Don't know why, but I get this strange feeling of wanting a very private and thought free space to have my creative juices flowing in the brain. This is very bad because as you can see, I end up doing nothing. So may be I will jot down something at least every week.

I am not yet into tweeter, may be I should have a look at it. Anybody there who tried that? Any advice/warning??

(Btw, I am really surprised on how the celebrities mange to have a blog and write daily on that. Really surprising to me. Is it really written by them or somebody is writing for them? Not sure)

BMTC Diaries: Burning sensation

2009-05-31T00:31:00.011+05:30

These days I have reduced my frequency of travel in bus and rely on company transport. But I had and still keep having many experiences and thoughts on which I probably will write. I have this bad habit (one of the many I have) of postponing things with an intention of fine-tuning it a bit. This applies to my updating the blog also. So you may see very less updates of the blog. Somehow have to get over that. Any suggestions/tips/tricks?
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Honk! I was woken up in my bus on the way to office. The bus was at a junction and I had dozed off peacefully after boarding as the bus was almost empty and I had got a comfortable seat. Cool and fresh Bangalore breeze had made me slip off into the ‘nirvana’ state soon.

This honk came from a car driver who, I think, wanted to move ahead without waiting for the signal to turn Green. I was looking around and it was a big junction on Residency road. There were about 10-12 two-wheelers, 4-5 cars, 3 buses, 4-5 auto-rickshaws at the junction. Some of them were honking impatiently as if those honking will make the signal change quickly. Two things stuck me.

All this impatience is of no use. You leave this signal at the speed of a rocket, just to reach the next signal first. You will reach the next signal to only greet all those slow starters from the previous signal who will slowly come and stand beside you in this signal or junction. So no point racing ahead when you see ‘Green’.

Second point was a bit statistical which will require some data backing to it. I could see around 25 vehicles at a signal to one-side, so around 75 still vehicles at any given point (25 x 3, assuming one signal is green and vehicles at that side is moving.) My wild guesstimate tells me there would be minimum 100 such signals in Bangalore. So total 100 x 75 = 7500 vehicles at a peak hour which are still but the engine are ‘On’.

Later on I did a simple calculation as below based on the following assumptions:
10 cars and 30 2-wheelers at a junction, including 3 roads.
100 junctions in Bangalore alone
10 hours per day when signal is active
Car gets a 12 km per litre and 2-wheeler gets 60 km.

Going by the above, an amount between 30 to 40 Lakhs PER DAY is burnt together by people in Bangalore waiting a signal. This is just the story of Bangalore. Assume there are 10 other cities in India with same 100 or more signals and above assumptions. A clean 3 to 4 Crores per day? And add other cities in India with tweaking the assumptions a bit. I am sure not less than 5 Crores PER DAY (around 1500 Crores PER YEAR) is spent at traffic signals by burning fuel. So imagine the savings if you just switch off the engine for 1 minute at a signal.

This thought was alarming to me. How much money & fuel (a non-renewable source of energy) can be saved by just a small twist of our hand. Amazing as well as alarming. I always used to switch off the engine of my car or bike at a junction due to selfish reason, to save my money. But now realizing the bigger picture, I urge each one of you to practice this to save Earth.

Believe it or not !!!

2009-05-30T23:19:00.003+05:30

There are 2 types of people in this world. First, who knows about a particular thing. Second, who believes about the same thing.

Tune to Class VIII B. Teacher, who has a spiritual inclination, was taking a new chapter and at some point asked, “How many of you believe in God?” All, except this particular child, raised their hand.

Surprised at this the teacher asked this child, “Why? You don’t believe in God?” The child replies, “No. I know God. I don’t need to believe in God.” The child continues, “Ma’am, I don’t need to believe that you are standing in front of me. I know that you are in front of me.”

We believe in something which we don’t know, or which we are not sure of. We don’t believe in something that we know. I have to believe that there is Grand Canyon or Niagara falls because I have not seen them. (Of course I may be convinced that they are there, but then too there is some degree of uncertainty)

At the same time I do not need to believe that there is Taj Mahal, or that you, the reader, exist. I know that its there.

Another school of thought: Whether we believe in something or know something, things are there as they are. We believing it or knowing it does not change it anything. For our own comfort and convenience we either know it, believe it or disbelieve it. The fact does not change, it remains.

BMTC Diaries: Cool Conductors

2009-03-11T11:22:00.011+05:30

It was yet another day when I hurriedly walked to the bus stop at around 6.30 am. I quickly checked my pockets to see if any change is there. Lucky, I have got some change for the tickets. Conductors are an integral part of the BMTC journey, and for any bus journey for that matter. And I think Bangalore is one place where you find a lot of feminine crowd also doing this job.
These conductors in BMTC are very smart. They adopt certain techniques to make more unaccounted moolah!

Technique 1
If you require a ticket for Rs. 3 or 4, and you give a denomination of coins 2 + 1 or 2 + 2, then they will try to strike a ‘deal’ with you if possible. They will return the 1 Re. coin or the 2 Rs. coin to you. The deal is that for a Rs. 3 or 4 tickets you need to pay only Rs.2 and no ticket. He will just return the ‘excess’ amount and walk away as if nothing has happened.

Now, its up to you to feel joyful about the deal that saved Rs. 1 or 2 for you, or worry on if any ticket inspector is on his way from the next stop. Either ways, Mr. Conductor is happy. He has got some (unaccounted) money, and assuming he does it with around 75-100 people per day, he has a decent ‘earning’. Also he is not responsible for people travelling without ticket.

Technique 2
In case you give a currency of 20 or 50 or 100 for a ticket of, say, Rs. 8, and unfortunately you don’t have change to exact amount. The gentleman conductor will scribble the balance in the reverse of the ticket (you get a ticket in case he doesn’t apply the Technique 1 above). Most of the cases he will do it even if he can pay the balance then and there. After all we cannot dig into his purse and check for the balance, right?

Now it is up to your presence of mind that you ask for the balance while you get down. If you missed it, you missed it, that’s it. I think the conductors adopt this because most often people forget (unless one is very much aware and vigilant about the balance that is due, unfortunately I am not one among that gang). So if a balance of 2 or 5 or 10 or whatever is due and you get down, and forget to ask for that, bus would have left by the time you recollect this. If a conductor manages to owe big amounts like this to about 30-40 people per day, and people like me travel in his bus, he can make around 200-300 bucks per day easily. Smart! Isn’t it?

Both these techniques are used widely by conductors, both male and female, and unless we customers are vigilant and smart, they will really take us for a ride in their gigantic bus. By the way, my bus has come and I am careful to hand over the exact change or get the balance promptly even though the conductor is a pretty lady. Oh no, the bus is moving, let me get in..

Shambho!!

2009-02-23T11:34:00.005+05:30

Shambho!!

Thats how lord Shiva transforms the world, and tonight is Shivaratri.

The thought of transforming my blog was also there in my mind for quite some time. And the day could not get better than today, being Shivaratri.

Continuos transformation is required in every creation, to keep everything new, fresh and alive. Nature takes care of this aspect so beautifully, every leaf blossoms, ripens and then falls off to join the earth, and again it becomes a part of the plant.

So, we, as humans, should transform ourself to getting better. Good thought? :-)

Love
Gopu

BMTC Diaries: Vroom…..

2009-02-22T12:59:00.005+05:30

BMTC (Bengaluru Metropolitan Transport Corporation), for those who are wondering what it is, is the government owned city & suburban bus service. Find more about BMTC in BMTC website, and in Wikipedia.

I am using the service of BMTC to commute to work. I have company transport, but since the timings are not convenient to me, I use BMTC to go to office and to return I use office transport. I’ve been using BMTC’s service for the past 3-4 years, except for about an year.

In this series I share my experiences in the daily BMTC travel that I do to office. The morning Bangalore, people, BMTC experiences, that I get during my 1 hour journey to office. The sequence of my travel is of 3 types; Bus-Bus-Bus-Walk (90% of times), Bus-Bus-Walk (8% of times), Bus-Walk (2%); which means, in the first case I have to change 3 buses and walk about a kilometer to my office, as my office is at the end of a business park, and so are the other types.

I set out at around 6 AM in the morning, or at times 6.30, or 7 to the nearby bus stop. I stay in Jayanagar 4-T Block (South Bangalore), and my office is in a place called Nagawara (North Bangalore), so has to cut-across the city.

The route: In the Bus-Bus-Bus-Walk scheme, I take my first bus to Jayanagar 4th Blcok, and from 4th Block another bus which pass through Jayanagar 3rd Block, Lalbagh gardens, Shanthi Nagar BMTC Bus Stand, Residency Road, M.G Road and reach Shivaji Nagar. From Shivaji Nagar I take another bus which goes to Yelahanka, which pass through Cunningham road, Bangalore Cantonment Railway Station, Tannery Road, and finally Nagawara. The entire trip takes about 1 hour in the morning hours before 8.

During the first few days of my travel, I used to go to the bus stop, carrying my bag, somewhat neatly dressed. There used to be very few people at the bus-stop, like some flower or vegetable sellers, a few students who are going for their early morning tuitions and very few early office goers like me. Initial days, I used to get these who-is-this-guy kind of looks from the vendors, and a few other people since they used to see office goers only little late.

More any my daily experiences are on the way. Do let me know what you feel on this article.

Love
Gopu

Ransom

2009-02-19T21:02:00.008+05:30

A man was walking hurriedly along the road with a bag when his friend saw him. His friend asked him, "Hello, you look to be in a hurry. Where are you going?".

He replied, "Yes, I am in a hurry. My wife is kidnapped. This bag is full of money to pay to the kidnappers as ransom."

His friend said sadly, "Oh! Thats too bad. You go fast and get your wife back."

The man said, walking away, "No, that's not the case. The kidnappers have threatened that if I don't pay the ransom they will release mywife."

Ram Sena, Shiv Sena and finally Vanara Sena

2009-02-16T12:33:00.012+05:30

"Yada Yada Hi Dharmasya
Glanirva Bhavathi Bharatha,
Abhyuthanam Adharmaysya
Tadatmanam Srijami Aham'.
- Bhagavad Gita (Chapter IV-7)

"Whenever there is decay
of righteousness O! Bharatha
And a rise of unrighteousness
then I manifest Myself!"

These are the days when many senas are formed for restoring the dharma in the world (India, to be precise as per the Sena’s jurisdiction). They decide who should do what. They will tell who all should go to pubs, restaurants, what people should wear, who all should celebrate which all festivals and the list goes on.

They have proved their mettle in Mumbai, and especially their presence during the Mumbai attacks their presence was greatly felt as they were in the forefront in rescue operations. They, who were against people who were not Maharashtrians, did not oppose or make noise when non- Maharashtrians were trying to rescue the Maharashtrians caught in the hotels. Those things are okay for them.

Another set of Sena is trying to gain popularity by attacking women in South India and thereby creating a replica of the North India Sena here. Claiming that the women were breaking or violating the Indian Culture laws laid down by the Sena, they beat the women. Yes, beating up women was not there in the Indian Culture laws given to them by their leaders. Poor guys, they don’t know what they are doing.

They are a bunch of people who are totally confused. They do not know what they want and where they are heading. They think by forcing people do a few things which they think are right, they can restore the Indian culture. Poor them! I feel pity.

They think they preserve Indian culture and traditions by stopping people from celebrating a few occasions like Valentine’s Day. These small, petty issues clearly shows how small-minded and narrow is their vision.

India has a tradition of honoring and valuing all other cultures and traditions. If at all those Sainiks feel Indian culture, traditions and heritage is collapsing, they should have come up with some valid reasons. Even I feel the same, but it cannot be and should not be restored by the means the Sainiks adopt. There are several other reasons and ways in which it can be done.

Among the leaders of these, so called, Sainiks, I am sure many of them would be using technology gadgets, dress and many other things made in western countries. I also doubt how much they themselves are following Indian traditions and values. I am sure most of them will not be, whether it is family values, religious traditions or societal commitments. It’s just the political and personal interests that they do all these halla-bulla.

I feel a few of the questions they should ask themselves are:
Are they, their family and relatives following the Indian family & traditional values, in terms of festivals, dress etc.
Are they promoting Indian products and brands rather than foreign products? I am sure they will be using many of the foreign brands and products right from the toothpaste that they use to the cars they use.
One major Indian value is non-violence. Are they practicing it? One single man, with this single principle has given freedom to an entire country. And that principle is still valid today. Arguments like ‘non-violence is not relevant today’ are baseless.

If they are able to justify all these then there is some sense in those Sena’s existing. Or they are a waste, to the society, nation and for themselves.

By the way, an amusing point to note:
Shiv Sena: Lord Shiva’s Sena, or army, consisted of bhuta-ganas (demons) who were headed by Lord Ganapati.
Ram Sena: Lord Rama’s Sena was full of Vanaras or Monkeys.

True, these senas are now trying to live up to their name.

From 1990 to 2010

2009-02-07T13:04:00.009+05:30

I found this very amusing picture in the net. Very truly reflects what has changed over the past two decades.

I have not been posting for sometime, don't know why. Lack of topics, events, ?? Naaaah! But somehow I get this love-hate syndrome with the internet. Sometimes I fall deeply in love with the internet, other times I may not even come online for weeks. Anyways I have something in my mind that will come up in this space, and hopefully continously.

Love

Gopu

The Consultant and the Shepherd

2008-11-23T21:04:00.008+05:30

Its story time again! This time I would like to share a story about the (so called) corporate consultants, who will study, analyze, the problems or challenges, suggest solutions and fix the problems (hopefully). Hope you enjoy it.

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One day a consultant was traveling in a car by the countryside when he came across a big herd of sheep. He slowed down to allow the herd to cross the road. Behind the head was the shepherd who managed the herd.
He stopped the car to take a break, and during that time he spoke to the shepherd. The consultant told him that he will tell him exactly how many sheep were in the herd, and in return the shepherd should give him a sheep as his fee. The innocent shepherd agreed. After 10-15 minutes of studies and analysis, the consultant replies, “You have got 257 sheep in your herd.”

The shepherd agreed that it was correct and told him that the consultant could choose one sheep from the herd. The consultant chose his sheep, put it in his car and when he was about to leave the shepherd asked him, “Aren’t you a consultant?” Surprised, the consultant replies, “Yes, but how did you come to know?”

The shepherd said, “I could figure it out in 3 instances. First, you offered me your service even without me asking for it. Secondly, you gave some information which I already know. You did not tell me anything new that I did not know about my business. Thirdly, you have taken my dog and put in your car thinking it’s a sheep, which shows that you have absolutely no idea about my business and its nature.”

Are you in Programming or in Management?

2008-10-29T13:21:00.009+05:30

I came across this bit in the internet and found it very amusing. Thought I will share it with you. :-)
In someway it talks about the truth, isn't it?
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A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below.

He descended a bit more and shouted, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The woman below replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You’re between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude.”

“You must be a programmer,” said the balloonist.

“I am,” replied the woman, “How did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct, but I’ve no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help at all. If anything, you’ve delayed my trip.”

The woman below responded, “You must be in Management.”

“I am,” replied the balloonist, “but how did you know?”

“Well,” said the woman, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it’s my fault.”

I yaame Mallu

2008-10-09T15:28:00.004+05:30

“MeiM jātā hōōM. Mujhe yahāM nahi āna haiM”. The venue is a packed school auditorium somewhere in Delhi, India. The school annual day celebrations are going on. It’s a group of students presenting a skit in Hindi, obviously the kid who is saying the dialogue, is from Kerala.

A fresh software engineer from Kerala, who came to Bangalore for the first time, in a bakery. “Errr…Can I get tea, chips…hai kya?”, confused as to use which language. “എന്താ വേണ്ടേ ?(What do you want?)”, comes the reply from the shopkeeper.

Mallu (മല്ലു): Short for Malayalee (മലയാളി) . A rare species of Homo-sapiens found in almost every terrain, irrespective of the climatic conditions of the local geography. Highly adaptable, ambitious (when outside their breeding ground of Kerala), has high survival capabilities (outside Kerala) of that of cockroaches and lizards. Can live without air for days but not without a Mohanlal or Mammootty movie, Puttu-kadala, Idiyappam-kadala or Appam-stew once a week.

Let’s accept it. Mallus (pet name for anyone who hails from God’s own country, Kerala) are everywhere. I don’t think there is any other group which is so widely present in the world. Right from North Pole to South Pole, from Sydney to Sweden, they are there. As a story goes when Neil Armstrong landed in Moon there was a Mallu, Govindan-kutty, there who welcomed him, and offered him a black coffee. It was told that Govindan-kutty was running a Hotel & Tea-shop there in moon long before Neil Armstrong landed. But one thing in true, which ever corner you go in this world there will be one Mallu at least to whom you will run into.

I have seen that they behave very strangely. We cannot find any correlation between their behavior when they are inside Kerala and outside Kerala.

Within Kerala there is nobody else who has so much of detrimental attitude, who takes things for granted. ‘It’s my world, it’s my life, who is bothered?’ – kind of attitude. You take the Mallu through Palakkad (one of the major border districts in Kerala), and slowly head towards the border check-post in Valayar, his behavior appears to change dramatically. And once outside Kerala, he is the smart, ‘ready-to-do-anything’ fellow, who knows how to get his way through.

He, in Kerala, will raise slogans and hold flags, throw stones at vehicles, put vehicles to fire, disrupt the normal life of people for petty issues, but the same Mallu when in some other state or country will dutifully follow the rules and will not get into any kind of fix.
The one who talks about labour unions, and justifies the need to have a socialistic society when crosses the Arabian Sea and reaches the shores of Arabic countries forgets all his past and starts living a life of a perfect citizen follow the capitalistic model there and admire it.

The one who blames and shouts at the Government of Kerala for having kept a toll booth in a bridge for Rs.10/- will very sincerely pay the toll to be paid in any other part of the world which will be several times this amount and will justify it.
I have failed to give a logical reasoning for this behavior. If anyone can help me understand this, I will be grateful. Is it because of the socio-economic-political scenario in Kerala, or is it because Kerala is supposed to be highly literate? I don’t know.

Bangalored

2008-09-26T13:16:00.001+05:30

Scene 1: 1998, in a small town in India
Father to Son: Have you got the application form for B. Sc in the National College, make sure that you apply on time, well before the last date. Also remember to get the application for the PSC examination coming up for UD Clerks examination.
Wife to husband: I have been asking to repair this TV. This black & white TV has been giving blurred pictures over the past one week. Please call the mechanic today.
Son to mother: Mom, I am going for tuition. I will be late as I have to replace the cycle’s bell, and also have to get groceries from Ramu’s store.

Scene 2: July 23, 2008. The same family, relocated to the nearest metro.
Son to Dad: I will be reaching San Joe by 3rd, when you and mom reach there by 20th, I will arrange to pick you up, as I will be traveling to New York. I will get my apartment furnished and cleaned by the time you come.
Dad to son: Ok, but have your friend agreed to take care of the car till we are back? Also we have to talk to the Apartment owners association as we will not be here for 6 months.
Mom: I am yet to get the masalas and pickles that we have to take. Also I have spoken to Mrs. Sharma about the alliance for our son. As their daughter is also working in the nearby city, may be we can have our son meet her when we are there. We can also see and talk to her. I want him to get married by this year.
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It might get into the dictionary, may be. A term used in US, to convey that the jobs there have been cut, and moved to India. Many there lost jobs, many here got jobs. The difference - the cost to the companies. The companies put it as the intellectual capital available, the quality of work, and the list goes on. ‘Bangalored’ is a term used in US, in a slight negative manner to indicate the job cuts there, which still keep happening. Now, I would like to know how this term impacted India.

If you look at a bigger picture, the Indian family has got transformed tremendously over the last decade. I remember, 10 years back, same time, nobody (I mean the ām Junta) had not heard about Infosys or TCS or Satyam. The term software was just taking the rounds. Computer languages were just being introduced. Well, it was there, but now it was getting more popularized. Youth who just passed out of college, who did not manage to get into a PSU or Government job, students who wanted to know more about computers (since from somewhere they had heard that Computers is the next big thing), all joined for these courses. Admission to Engineering which was considered a tough stream till early 1990s were getting (at least, feeling) simpler, with more and more colleges opening up.

Come 1999, and the software bubble burst. The few IT companies which had recruited some graduates delayed their joining; many IT professionals lost their jobs. But to the common Indian it did not make a difference. Silently he was getting ready for the next joy ride. Indian companies, by then had learnt the marketing techniques (projecting the cost factor to clients, and projecting the quality factor back home) which got them more and more business. A wave struck the IT sector in India, which was very dormant till then. Companies started recruiting heavily. Anybody from an engineering college could get into some IT company. And what it did to the āām Junta in a few years….

The early movers in IT got experience, moved up, fresh people were recruited heavily. Indian IT firms got more and more clients, in turn more and more money, in turn wanted more and more employees. Students were pushed, pressurized, brain-washed, compelled by parents, friends, relatives, ‘well-wishers’ to take up engineering, and if they were not able to get into any engineering college, to take up courses in IT from private institutes which advertised a pan-India presence and boasted about placements.

IT was tempting for the middle-class crowd, a relatively high pay packet which was not offered by any other sector for their experience, seemingly good working atmosphere (when compared to some engineering companies, in mechanical, civil or electrical streams). The IT crowd got bigger and richer. Many of them got chance to go ‘On-site’ (read US & money-minting). This economic growth of the IT crowd and IT companies pole-vaulted them into the top slots.

IT companies touched the US$ 1Bn mark in record time, which no other company in other sector could dream of. IT crowd (the so called middle-class Indian) could afford and started buying things which they could not even dream of a few years back. They bought house/houses, car/cars. Marriage market value of ‘Software Professional’ sore high touching unimaginable levels. The lifestyle of middle-class household began to change. The pressure on the students started increasing to join Engineering, or any IT company. They could not choose for a finance stream or a science stream of their choice. IT and Software became more popular terms than politics and corruption. Infosys and TCS become the topic of conversation among the parents and superseded the priority the PSUs had.

Money started flowing, and the value of money came down. The upper-class remained rich, the middle-class became richer, the poor became poorer. The economically weaker section was the worst hit due to this change in lifestyle. They could not afford things since inflation was sky high. The other sections managed to live through.

The BPO story is also similar. But the difference is that it was seen as less glamorous as compared to the IT scene. If you really look at the IT and BPO sector, both are same. It is just that the nature of work is different and skill sets required to do that job is different. Both jobs came from US or other regions. Both are outsourced. No difference. Just that the clients give more money to Indian companies for IT work than BPO work, which in turn results in more salary for IT guy then a BPO guy. Otherwise it’s all same.

I don’t know how this will go on or what is going to be the end. People have lost interest in other fields like R&D in Science, Economics, and Statistics, to name a few. Students who take jobs in those streams are looked down upon. Recently I happened to see a few programs in Discovery channel where a few of the people interviewed had jobs like ‘Elephant Researcher’, ‘Wildlife Activist and Photographer, ‘Wildlife artist’. The social scenario in India does not allow an Indian to take up jobs like these and follow their passion, their interests. Students are taught art forms like music and dance to add market value to them, not because they have passion for that. Nobody is bothered to develop artistic talents in them, all are in a rat race to gain, I don’t know what. May be money, power, social status, fame.

This is what Bangalored has done to India, both good and bad. But I hope someday in future the people realize what they have lost and have been losing in the process, and work towards restoring the Indian culture, to respect and value each individual irrespective of his background, financial status, job, position. Some day it will happen.

Live and Let Die

2008-07-06T15:28:00.001+05:30

Beep…Beep…!!

I was having lunch at my office when this message popped up in my mobile. I took the mobile out from my pocket with great difficulty and read the message which looked like this:
‘News flash: Inflation touches 11.43%, an all time high in 13 years. Sensex down 445 points, Nifty down 113 points. Log on to moneycontrol.com for more details.’

I got irritated, what is this inflation got to do with me. Ok, Sensex and Nifty I can understand as I have also invested in a small way (after hearing the India shining story and all). So Sensex & Nifty didn’t irritate me as much as this inflation figure. After lunch, I was still thinking about it. Inflation: a term that I didn’t know much about in school days. Theoretically I knew something about it in college days, but I never bothered to think too much about it as I thought it is something to do with the Economists and Statisticians in this world.

But now I was thinking about it. What is inflation? Simply put it means the rate at which value of Rupee decreases (I don’t think it ever increases). So if it is 10%, for e.g., it means next year, you will have to pay Rs.110, for an item which is worth Rs.100 now. I went to a website to know more about it. It told me that inflation was around 5-7 % normally and it had risen to 11% off late. As I understood (and felt with increase of prices in almost everything) we have to pay extra for everything. Fuel prices increased, which lead to increase of prices of all other commodities. After looking at the figures and news in the website I concluded: ‘Live and Let Die’.

Of course I like Bond movies of gadgets and girls, but this title of one Bond movie is in a different context and has a different meaning. I go by the Buddhist philosophy of removing our desires, which are the root cause of all the miseries in life. So the statement “Live and Let Die’ means: ‘You Live and let all your desires/ ambitions/ wishes Die’.

Here are some practical steps on how you can beat inflation and earn & save more.
1. Walk: Don’t use any mode of transport, no bikes/ scooters, no cars, not even public transport because those prices are also increasing. Walking is good for health, and also prevents and cures many current-age diseases like obesity, hypertension etc. Only in case of emergencies use public transport, that too, try not to take tickets.

2. Fast: Fast 3-4 days a week. Fasting is a very effective way to balance mind and body. It even saves you the hefty food bills in your budget. Fasting helps reduce weight and tone your body (Fitness freaks, are you listening??) If possible don’t eat anything at all.

3. Don’t go to school: Don’t send children to school. Home schooling is the best. It saves lakhs of rupees spent on education which just don’t actually educate kids but ruins them. Anyways home schooling is the best till they are 15. After that if necessary send them to some government college, avail all reservations possible to minimize cost. Motivate them by stories of college drop-outs like Bill Gates, and see if something works.

4. Turn Spiritual: Practice meditation, try to kill the desires in you, those disturbing thoughts of latest designs in Shoppers Stop, Levi’s, Nike, Reebok and the like. Practice to renounce everything, live a minimal life. Use clothing only when it’s absolutely necessary, and that too very minimal. Get motivated from Bollywood actresses who practice this point (they are ardent followers of Gandhiji’s philosophy of minimal clothing).

Also there is another point which relates to inflation. This is regarding the salary hikes in companies. (Hope my manager reads this!!!) As I already mentioned if inflation is 10% it means you will need Rs.110 to buy an item which is worth Rs.100 today. So you getting a hike of 10% just means that your salary is adjusted to inflation, or in simple words, your salary is kept the same. Only if you are getting a hike of above 10% can you afford to buy something extra. And if you are getting a hike of anything below 10%, say 7%, you will not be able to afford the thing (which is worth Rs.110) which you are able to afford before the hike. In effect, your salary is being reduced if your hike is below the rate of inflation.

Even if you didn’t know what inflation is by the above examples you must have got an idea on what it is about. Now you are ready to device your own ways and means to beat inflation or be ahead of it.

Traffic Blues : Confessions of a driver

2006-04-05T13:10:00.001+05:30

It took me almost 3 months to post this blog. But its because I have this Love-Hate relationship with the Internet. At times I fall deeply in love with it and never move away from the computer, and the next full month I would be just logging in to check the mails and nothing else. This has affected my communication in terms of chatting and the number of mails that I sent and receive. So if anyone can suggest a solution for this, Please Help!!!

Driving is one other thing that fall prey to my Love-Hate syndrome. At times its my passion and some other time its a boredom. Over the years I have driven through many palaces. Germany, Swiss, Austria, Belgium,.... Well, they are places where I would like to drive. The places where I drive around is the Incredible India's south.

The one area of oneness that I see in Indians, where all people share the same values and culture, apart from the political culture of looting people, is in driving. Well, the be precise, there are no values, no rules, no sympathy or emotions in driving as far as I have seen.

No, I am not talking about you. You are nice, caring and compassionate driver who is always concerned about the fellow drivers and passengers. I know that you also follow all the rules of driving, and never break a law. I am talking about those other rascals who just see vehicle and its purpose as their birth right.

A saying goes, "In Africa, a Lion wakes up to learn that it has to run faster than the slowest Zebra to be alive. And a Zebra wakes up to realize that it has to run faster than the fastest Lion in order to survive. So it doesn't matter what you are, you will have to keep running faster to be alive."

I was trying to draw a corollary between the above statement and driving in India. I have heard that the roads are worst in India and the traffic systems are poor when compared to international standards. I learned driving in the streets of Kochi, but then the traffic was too less. During those times, I used to leave hands while driving a bike to show all signals and not break the law. But here in B'lore I see many people doing the same thing (many times both hands) but hands are used to comb the hair or to pat the babes in the backseat. I was scared of driving in the 'crowded' cities of metros where the traffic rules were(supposed to be) very stringent. But over a period of time I also have become used to it, like many others.

Once I had a strange experience. I was traveling in B'lore with my friend, who was driving his friends bike. And the police was there to check and as usual asked a fine of Rs 1000. There were not even a single document for the bike and my friend began to cook up stories. I stood there, shivering, as he had come to receive me at the bus stand and it was my first trip in Bike in B'lore. He started saying to police that his Dad was in Army and his Uncle was in police and it went on. I stood there dumbstruck. I have never heard of any police uncle and his Dad known to me, was not in Army. Then guess what, the rates started coming down to 500, 300, 100 and you wont believe it, we gave Rs 10 to the police and left. This is the case in B'lore and I am not lying.

We cant just blame the law enforcing agencies. They are underpaid. And thanks to the media, they also hear about India's booming economy, that GDP is going to touch 8%, that 50% of India's population is under 30, and about the rising income levels and high percentage of disposable income of Indian youth. When MNC s of the world can en cash this rising and disposable income, why cant the responsible law-keepers do the same. We cant blame them. Today, people spend Rs.500 to see a single movie in PVR at Forum Mall in B'lore. Its not the millionaires who see them, its our own friends. so you can imagine the kind of 'disposable' income. (In Kerala, about 16 people can watch the same movie in a good theatre and 10 people in the best ones).

Newspapers write about "crumbling Infrastructure" in B'lore. The head honchos of IT firms complain about it. But the real pain of this 'crumbling' thing is not felt by the politicians or heads of companies. Its the common man, see the BMTC buses, the scooters, the mopeds. They pay the fine for that.

People are ignorant about good driving habits. They need education. Overtaking from left is a way of life here. Squeesing in through any narrow path, no matter if its footpath or someones plot, is a habit. And in a land where even the police say "Laws are made to break", who cares?

The Morning Raagas

2006-01-10T14:55:00.001+05:30

Click! And I shut-off the alarm, which was disturbing my sleep and curled up again, as usual. (It has sometimes occurred to me that we keep alarms just to test whether the Alarm function will work properly or not and not to get up when it rings.)

Then I remembered the new (year) resolution that my friend and I had taken last evening. To get up early and go for a morning walk to streamline our bodies. We decided not to take too many resolutions, (which obviously is one resolution by itself) and the second one was this.

After a lot of self-convincing, visualisng the leaner and meaner body shape that we would have, we were on the road in next ten minutes. Off we went, past the shut bakery, mobile shop to a wider road.

The road already had some regular walkies, from 10 year old to 80 year old. Other occupiers of the road were the milk vans, garbage collectors and early commuters for work.

There were grandpas and grannies wearing thick sweaters and caps, so thick that even a bullet cannot reach their body. We could hardly see their eyes, the face covered with woolen caps. They wore Adidas and Nike shoes and were walking slowly either with their partner or alone.

Some of them, who seemed to be little on the healthier and sporty side, were seen to carry a stick, not a walking stick, with them. I tried to understand, why? There are no stray dogs that you need arm yourself, and no, its not a walking stick since it is short, about 2 feet or so. Many grandpas seem to carry that, some of them were even thinner than the stick that they carry!

We walked on, and came across the new age health conscious and body conscious teen and youth. A typical one sports a Reebok T-shirt and cap, Nike shoes, Adidas tracks, an Apple iPod and they walk as if there is nobody else in an area of one square kilometer engrossed in their music. They walked fast; some overtook us who were devoid of the walking gears and accessories.

It was fun to watch some grannies and housewives walking with keys all around their bellies (who were wearing saris did that), and they also wearing Nike/Reebok sports shoes for walking. Some of the faces looked as if it was a mourning walk. Some groups were in their own world, while some other local groups were discussing the last night’s episode of that serial and the story of shopkeeper who tried to charge more for cabbage. Thus went their talks.

As we approached the park, it was business hour for some smart businessmen. There were people who sold fruit juices, of all possible juice variety that can reduce fat, increase digestion, blood circulation and memory. You could also get a brochure on health tips; mainly focusing on what juice should you take on which day for best results etc. It was indeed good businesses for them as people are turning health conscious day by day.

A loud set of voices made us turn their heads and look back. No, it was not an abuse like what we expected. It was a Veterans club having a hot discussion whether Siddaramiah should resign and Dharam Sing's stand on that issue. There are many such veteran clubs, a bunch of retired officers, who meet daily. They whisk away from home (mainly from wife) claiming to go for a walk, and end up discussing these 'hot' issues in park while relaxing after their walk from home to park. Then they go to the hotel nearby, have a coffee and break for the day. Some of them meet in the evening also for another session.

An interesting sight caught my attention. There was a person who was supposed to take a dog for a walk. The dog was so huge that it looked like a calf and it refused move. Its face said "No. Come what may, I am not coming. You do whatever you want." The person had to literally drag the dog, and he kept dragging it till I lost my sight. There were some others who had multiple dog chains with them, to me it looked like a chain on horses tied to a cart. (Like those chariots in Ramayana and Mahabharat).

It was time for us to return and on the way back we saw somewhat similar sights. People and venues had changed slightly. We saw bullet proofed grandparents, some with lathis, the modern day youth, dogs dragging people and people dragging dogs, distribution system of milk companies and fruit sellers, BPO/IT employees bound for Whitefield waiting for buses, etc.

In one way, a morning walk is healthy for body and mind too. Lots are there to observe in the small little world around us. So keep walking ! !

Brands Bargain !

2005-12-19T21:16:00.001+05:30

It was one fine afternoon when I took my bus to the city when I noticed a hoarding saying "Branded shirts for Rs 199...Buy one take one free...", so went the caption.

I sat thinking, branded shirts indeed. If we go and check it out, it will be the Astrogen and Nitrogen brands which we have never heard of. And there are takers for that and the sellers make good money.

Branding is the keyword here. Brand Management has been a subject in B-Schools and the P&Gs and HLLs of the world have positions called Brand Managers. They are supposed to create, grow, sustain and kill (if required) a brand. Their main job is to grow their brand, more often than not, by fooling consumers. (Recently a famous soap brand started calling that soap as 'beauty enhancer’ and no more a soap) They see to it that a customer is glued to their brand, remain loyal to their brand and thus create more value to the company, to use a business phrase.

If you really see, literally everything is branded. As per a study, an average person uses about 64 branded products everyday, from the time he gets up (toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, oil,..all are branded) till he or she sleeps.

The extent of branding is such that even the five elements of nature is now branded and sold in packs. In Costa Rica, people of different societal class use different brands of water to bathe: the upper class obviously use an expensive brand, middle class use a brand little lower and the lower class people end up using the least expensive brand !!

Air, which we thought was free for all, is not so. In Japan, we have to pay to breathe fresh air. After a trip of underground rail travel, people buy packaged air, oxygen basically, to breathe and to feel fresh. There is a company that does this great packaging, and claims a lot of R&D work has gone behind this initiative. Another fact is that only 20-25% of the air is practically used by the consumer, the rest escapes into the air, which the company effectively taps and reuses!! Similarly Earth and Fire are also branded.

Yes, if we look at the quality levels there is a difference in good brands and not so good brands. But the difference is not so much that we pay 3 or 4 times the actual cost. The premium brands, be it any product category, exploit the consumer simply by putting a high price tag on the product, by depicting a lady or by nonsense tagline, ("Are you in the loop" a recent one by a famous Denim wear company).

The marketers of these products very well know the Brand affinity is very much there in today's youth (well, youth is the main target of all the Brand Managers as 60% of India's population is below 30 years of age and older people are not so stupid to pay hefty sums for a brand tag).

It might be astonishing to find that most of the branded goods that we bought, the latest pair of Pepe jeans and that Nike Shoe that was purchased last week, doesn't even cost one fifth of the price. The company itself admits it; I've heard it from the people who run those companies. They are simply making money out of the Brand name. You pay for the Brand name, not for the product. It’s hard to digest, but true. So next time you feel that you need to purchase that branded shirt/jeans/shoe, just remember this, that’s all.

Happy Shopping!!

Gaalis and Thaalis are welcome.