My Twisted Blog

Opal! Bad Girl!

2009-09-22T05:43:00.002-05:00

Opal Update...

She's a smart puppy! During my last exams she decided that she was not getting enough attention. It was my hardest semester of law school and I was totally immersed in my studies.

I let her out in the yard to run around and get some exercise and wasn't really paying attention to what she was doing. She apparently got a little too close to the pool and then found some dirt. Nice, fertile, BLACK DIRT!

She came running back to the house and when I picked her up, mud dripped between my fingers! She went straight to the tub! The downstairs tub is huge, it's an indoor Jacuzzi tub that is bigger than the tubs put in new houses today. Two people can sit in it side by side and it has a heater that heats the water too! The down side is that it takes a LOT of water to fill it.

As you can see behind her, the gazillion gallons of water it took to bathe her was BLACK and she wasn't even clean yet! The tub was just as hard to clean as she was!

My school load has lessoned so poor Opal won't be neglected as much anymore.

I could've written this song!

2009-08-21T17:09:00.002-05:00

I have made it through another semester of Law School, I did quite well considering everything that was going on. I moved, became officially divorced and was stalked by a guy who is no longer a friend of mine. It's really sad when someone who you think is a friend moves in for the kill when you are wounded and hurt.

I have 6 more classes left and I am scheduled to graduate in May. I don't even have to put 2010 behind it anymore! I take Domestic Law this fall, I should make an A. My attorney is the professor and I did a lot of the grunt work in my own case. Saved me TONS of money!

This song goes on the playlist for my housewarming, divorce, freedom party!

Say It (Blue October)

It’s all about steam
It’s all about dreams
It’s all about making the best out of everything
You’ll know when your fine
Cause you’ll talk like a mime

You’ll fall on your face
You get back up and you’re doing fine
“a considerate clown, a preachy preaching machine”
is one of the sweetest things you would say about me
but I don’t have the time for your distorted esteem
why are you toying with my mind?

I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
Now you’re messing with my pride

Look, You think you’re smarter than me
Well everyone knows you will never be smarter than me
That’s how it goes
I gained forty pounds because of you
Was there an “S” on my chest
Well I confess, you were too much stress
I’d have a heart attack at best
So now I breathe it out, I breathe it out
I spit it on the crowd cause they lift me up, they lift me up, they lift me up

When I’m feeling down
What am I spitting out? spitting out, something we never talk about
It’s called my …mind

I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
Now you’re messing with my pride

I’m sick of standing in your line
So now you’ll have to take it
take this to heart
I will never let you fuck me over
Stop talking down to me your war is old
your game is over
So here’s my colder shoulder

I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say it
I don’t wanna hear you say say say say say say say say it
Now you’re messing with my pride

Something we don’t talk about
Something we never talk about

In Honor Of Today! 8/7/09

2009-08-07T21:48:00.004-05:00

In honor of my divorce decree being entered today. Here's a tune that speaks to me.

Freedom '90
George Michael

I won't let you down
I will not give you up
Gotta have some faith in the sound
It's the one good thing that I've got
I won't let you down
So please don't give me up
Because I would really, really love to stick around

Heaven knows I was just a young boy
Didn't know what I wanted to be
I was every little hungry schoolgirl's pride and joy
And I guess it was enough for me
To win the race? A prettier face!
Brand new clothes and a big fat place
On your rock and roll TV
But today the way I play the game is not the same
No way
Think I'm gonna get me some happy

I think there's something you should know
I think it's time I told you so
There's something deep inside of me
There's someone else I've got to be
Take back your picture in a frame
Take back your singing in the rain
I just hope you understand
Sometimes the clothes do not make the man

All we have to do now
Is take these lies and make them true somehow
All we have to see
Is that I don't belong to you
And you don't belong to me
Freedom
You've gotta give for what you take
Freedom
You've gotta give for what you take

Heaven knows we sure had some fun boy
What a kick just a buddy and me
We had every big shot good-time band on the run boy
We were living in a fantasy
We won the race
Got out of the place
I went back home got a brand new face
For the boys on MTV
But today the way I play the game has got to change
Oh yeah
Now I'm gonna get myself happy

I think there's something you should know
I think it's time I stopped the show
There's something deep inside of me
There's someone I forgot to be
Take back your picture in a frame
Don't think that I'll be back again
I just hope you understand
Sometimes the clothes do not make the man

All we have to do now
Is take these lies and make them true somehow
All we have to see
Is that I don't belong to you
And you don't belong to me
Freedom
You've gotta give for what you take
Freedom
You've gotta give for what you take

Well it looks like the road to heaven
But it feels like the road to hell
When I knew which side my bread was buttered
I took the knife as well
Posing for another picture
Everybody's got to sell
But when you shake your ass
They notice fast
And some mistakes were built to last
That's what you get

I say that's what you get

That's what you get for changing your mind
And after all this time
I just hope you understand
Sometimes the clothes
Do not make the man

I'll hold on to my freedom
May not be what you want from me
Just the way it's got to be
Lose the face now
I've got to live

Spontaneous Beach Trip 2

2009-07-27T18:58:00.005-05:00

Ok, so I did study while I was out in the sun!

Panama City Beach!!!

My friend, Mary Catherine invited me to her mom's place in Panama City Beach. All I had to do was drive her mom's van down there for her and bring our Cabana Boy, Gerry.

Gerry has become a good friend of ours, another positive thing from Facebook. I knew Gerry in high school, in fact, I had a huge crush on him. Something I had repressed in my memory until we rode for 5 hours together in the car. He started talking about football, and our 1982 State Championship and things started coming back to me.

My cousin wanted to send me a baseball jersey from her high school in Kentucky and asked me what number I wanted on the back...

When he mentioned his number, Eleven, I gasped! That was the number I chose for my jersey.

Funny thing about crushes, we would have never gotten along. I am thankful for his friendship now...

but hey!

He made an awesome Cabana Boy, here he is bringing us fresh beverages while we were floating in the ocean.

Life is good my friends!

Some Beach, Some Where!

2009-07-03T08:00:00.000-05:00

Wow, I can't believe it's been since 6/3 since I posted. I have been so busy, working, packing, moving, unpacking, school...

and the occasional, spontaneous BEACH TRIP!

I can't believe how isolated I had become in the last 4 or so years. I have really missed my friends. One of them had a free condo for the weekend so off we went.

It was nice to get away, away from the insanity which is my divorce.

Update on that...

Trial date was continued so the new trial date is 8/6. It may have to be continued again, it's right before my finals. Our judge is not going to be happy if he has to hear this case. It's just not worth it. I sent Mr. X my final counter proposal, after that, I will either increase everything or let it go to trial. He will end up paying his attorney the difference in the amount I am asking and the amount he has offered.

I have also been working diligently to prepare. It's not going looking good for him. Everything he claimed in the interrogatories I have found proof to dispute. He actually attacked me as a mother. He stated about the Youngest Boy, "she told him that he should not drink alcohol but her actions spoke louder than her words."

I find that quite amusing considering I have a picture of his daughter bringing him a beer in her bathing suit, hip cocked, making the Peace sign in her other hand.

Talk about your glass houses and throwing stones.

I promise to post more. I have actually started another blog. As soon as I get more than a few posts on it, I will let you guys know where it is!

Moving

2009-06-03T18:52:00.004-05:00

"I get by with a little help from my friends."
- John Lennon

I am so very appreciative of my friends. This is a shout-out to them.

As some of you may know, I have been locked out of my home for 4 months, I had a POD delivered on Saturday and was told by Mr.X that he would not allow me in to pack up my belongings unless it was convenient for him. He wasn't going to be available until that following Friday.

I saw his ex-wife enter the house on Tuesday with a key, I was not happy about this considering that I did not give her permission or allow her access to my belongings.

So....

I moved 75% of my things during the next 2 days. Apparently, Mr.X was out of town. I wonder how the judge is going to feel about him allowing her into the house and not allowing me and also the subsequent harassment by her.

I had my Friends helping me. One friend in particular asked me why I was so nice to (didn't smack) the ex-wife who thought she had the right to come walking right inside the house while we were there, without knocking. I just told her that it wasn't worth it. Mr.X will have to explain himself to the judge. I did, however, call the police the second time she came barging in and filed a report.

The highlight of the day was when the Daughter of Mr.X gave the "finger" to the teenage boys who were moving my furniture as her mother drove off. Sweet.

But Kudos to my Friends! Thanks for your help and there is probably only another load left and we will have a HUGE celebration when I am finally out!

Life's A Beach!

2009-05-25T11:20:00.005-05:00

Have a safe and fun Memorial Day! I am spending my holiday and week at the Gulf Coast. The weather was supposed to be awful but it ended up being beautiful. Just a little relaxation before coming home to deal with Mr.X and moving all of my belongings that he continues to hold hostage.

Thanks to all of those who serve and protect our freedoms so that we can all sit on the beach.

Kite Flying Expert (Youngest Boy)

Oldest Boy, having successfully completed his first year at Auburn and acquiring enough hours to almost be a junior (AP classes)! AND, still has his scholarship, which has been a problem for some freshmen!

School's Out For Summer!

2009-05-21T19:55:00.009-05:00

Today was the last day of regular school. Yippeeeee! Due to the economic climate and the mis-spending of our City Council and our School Board, they had to lay off 20 school bus drivers. This could have been bad for me if I had not been driving a bus for 7 years, but I was spared.

It DID however cause a shakeup in our routes. I got a route closer to my new home!! (more on that later!!)

After I dropped the kids off for the last time, I ran some errands and came back to where I am temporarily staying. This is what was waiting for me on the ground.

Of course this intrigues me because I just got word today that I passed all my classes this semester!!! Wooo Hooo!!! Straight Cs but after all I have been through, I take them with pride.

So, after a little investigating I discover that the landlord who owns my friends place also owns the entire street basically and he had a dumpster delivered to throw out some stuff that previous tenants had left. There is no telling how long this stuff has been in storage....

SO, I had to take a peek, right?

You won't believe what I found. Apparently, a lawyer had vacated a property and left behind EVERYTHING, right down to his wedding album...but hey, if his marriage turned out like my last one...good riddance, right?

I don't think that anyone told the Bride that you could see right through her crocheted dress, or maybe that was the point. The other family members in the pictures didn't look very happy!

Along with files that probably should have been shredded, there were a few volumes of the Code of Alabama. If I was a true dumpster diver, I would have gone all the way in to see if the complete set was there...but I am NOT. I do have my limits.

This was in perfect shape and I like it!

This is pretty cool, the artist is G.R. Cheesebrough, and it's numbered and signed.

AND....This is sooooo cool I can't believe it. The autograph appears to be real, it looks like it got a little wet and the Y bled a little. I LOVE IT!

Last but not least, I pulled this out for my friend, Cindy. She was pining away for a 'hard body' to snuggle at night so when I saw him in the dumpster, I couldn't resist. Funny thing was, when I pulled him out of the dumpster, he was wearing 2 womens aprons. You guys don't know how funny and ironic that happened to be, but more on THAT later.

My law school has changed their schedule so now, for the first time in forever, I have some time off from work which coincides with the school break. The latest motion Mr.X asked for was such a hit in my circle, that one of my newest friends offered me his place at the beach for a week or so. (Say what you want about Lawyers, the ones I know are AWESOME!) The timing is great because Mr.X wants to be allowed to hover over me when I get my things and only allow me to pack when he is there and during times that are only convenient for him. That is why we will spend another day in court. But it will just show the judge the kind of person he is and help with the upcoming trial.

So cheers!!! The next blog post will be from the sand!

Happy Belated Mother's Day!

2009-05-11T09:46:00.002-05:00

Things are looking up for me, I had a most wonderful Mother's Day and my trial date has been set for 6/23. Mr. X wants to have a 'settlement conference' but there is no way that he is wasting any more of my time. He wants to save money but this is not the way to do it. If he wants to meet then he is going to have to pay all my attorneys fees. It won't look good to the judge that he won't discuss anything without making me pay my attorneys.

All he has to do is make an offer, after all, I was the last one to make an offer. But, I will continue to deposit his temporary support check until the trial. I'm not sure my attorney won't postpone until we get the interrogatories answered and all of the discovery asked for.

We shall see!

8 more school days left til SUMMER!

Crawfish Heaven!

2009-05-02T19:40:00.004-05:00

I got my fill of crawfish again! I went to the Shaeffer Eye Center Crawfish Boil and the VIP tickets include unlimited Crawfish! I have 2 exams left and ran into one of my professors. Fortunately, I had already taken (tanked) my Evidence exam. According to this professor, so did everyone else! I gave him my potato that came with my crawfish, maybe he will give me a couple of extra points in exchange!

Friends at the Boil, See me? I'm taking the pic! Always the one behind the camera!

Here are some updated pics of Opal. She is waiting for Crawfish scraps!

Exams and then Summer!

2009-04-20T18:31:00.004-05:00

Woooo Hoooo! I got the electives I wanted and am registered for the Summer Semester.

You may not be hearing much from me until exams are over. My nails are long, nice and pretty (by the time I take my exams, I chew them all off!)

These exams should be easier to handle since I don't have to baby Mr.X and try to study too. I sometimes wonder how he is getting along without me shopping for ALL of the groceries, driving my bus at 3:00, then coming home to put dinner on the table and rushing out the door to head to class at 5:45. Then I would come home from class between 8:30 and 9:00 and do it all over again, 4 nights a week. A huge burden has been lifted! And I am not at all bitter that had I not broken my foot from standing in Mr.X's piece of crap kitchen chair, I would be graduating in 5 days.

Summer Semester

Conflict of Laws
Pleadings and Practice
Law Office Practice
Municipal Court Practice and Procedure

Fall Semester

Wills
Domestic
Senior Seminar I

Spring Semester

Ethics
Trusts
Senior Seminar II

More Crawfish!!

2009-04-20T11:49:00.010-05:00

My friend Terri dragged me to a Baptist fundraiser Saturday. Baptists make me laugh but I couldn't turn down Crawfish. They were raising money so they could got to Brazil and witness to the heathens down there. But hey, it was CRAWFISH!

After showering the Cajun stink off of us, we went to see Damon Johnson and his new band The Welfare. I have been a Damon Johnson fan since Brother Cane and he arranged and recorded one of my all time favorite Christmas Songs, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen. The actual song is not my favorite but this version makes it a favorite.

A friend of mine from High School was on hand for some Cougar Training 101

Things overheard in the Cougar Den:

"Who is this guy and why does he keep touching me?"
"Cause you accidentally touched his butt."
"Ohhh"

"My feet hurt, when will the band stop playing so we can meet them?"
"Cougars NEVER show their discomfort...(age)."
"Ohhhh"

Mr.X Update

2009-04-14T19:23:00.004-05:00

I went to my attorney's office yesterday and picked up Mr.X's answers to our interrogatories.

All I can say is "wow"...and then smile and then laugh.

Why am I smiling?

It amazes me that his parents never taught him that lying is bad....very very bad.

He also didn't answer all the questions...sooooo, we just sit and waste time...probably to the tune of $375 an hour for his attorney. I have heard that his law firm is very 'diligent' in their billing. If they even THINK about a client while in the bathroom, they bill for it!!

Oh well...Mr.X wanted it this way. I'm just along for the ride.

Easter Cajun Style!

2009-04-12T10:16:00.004-05:00

I helped a friend put up a ceiling fan Friday night and he took me to meet his Cajun neighbors. These guys were really cool! (except for being LSU alums and fans)

They had family come in for the weekend bringing huge quantities of live CRAWFISH! Some of you may not know that I ADORE crawfish! These were the BEST I have ever had!!

They had the regular onions, corn and potatoes in the boil but they also added mushrooms and huge cloves of garlic!

Wow, that's all I can say....and my hands are still orange!

Do what you gotta...

2009-04-07T18:47:00.002-05:00

Businesses are tanking all over, so why not merge and combine services?
Heck, if you work your ass off all day to pay for day care, you are gonna need a beer at the end of the day!

My Lucky Day

2009-04-06T13:30:00.005-05:00

I used to be one of those kids who could stand and look at a patch of clover and find a 4-leaf just about every time I tried.

I found one yesterday while walking Opal. It was just there!

Today I went to the accountants office to sign the income tax returns for 2008. Mr.X told me that the State refund (we had to pay federal) would be direct deposited into his account. When the accountant told me that the check would be mailed to our home address, I asked her about this.

She said that Mr.X didn't want to write his account number on a form that I was going to see. This made me laugh!

I wonder why his attorney hasn't complied with our request for production of documents. They had 30 days. This is just a very expensive delay on Mr.X's part and it's all going to be on there, if it isn't, it's just perjury, AGAIN.

Copies of pay stubs
ALL accounts his name is on, including his mother's
Statements of these accounts
Canceled Checks
and the list goes on...

Now he is going to have to wait forever for the refund to be mailed....lol.

Warning! Strong Language!

2009-03-31T18:43:00.003-05:00

8. Lily Allen - Fuck You - For more funny videos, click here

This is my favorite song, today anyway. I want to produce the music video. THIS is NOT a music video...but I am giving them time and a huge 'shout-out' about my idea for the song. The lyrics are great and this is what I see, tell me if you agree after you listen to the song.

Keep in mind, there is NO WAY that this song will be played on the radio!

Lily Allen singing, (close-up then pan to the side)
Broadway type stage, lots of lights. Man in drag, you know the pretty kind, takes up singing only lip-syncing. Dressed in a Rockettes type costume.

Pan out
Chorus starts
Chorus line of Drag Queens doing a high kick type Rockettes kind of high kick.

I know you all can see it!?! Right?

I can SO produce this video...choreographer anyone?

Oh Happy Day!

2009-03-31T17:06:00.002-05:00

I just love it when a person perjures himself on the stand! During a court proceeding that is being recorded by a court recorder! Especially when there is digital proof to impeach them later, like in a trial?

Some people have a knack for recording and documenting EVERYTHING...maybe it's an OCD thing. I do it...

These are the clients attorneys love!

The plaintiff lies, and out comes documentation to prove otherwise...

And remember this blogfans...perjury is a crime. And, it really makes you look like a loser...or someone who isn't smart enough to know better.

So, my advice to everyone...tell the truth under oath, and save those incriminating pictures and emails. It makes attorneys happy!

Cheers!

It's Spring!

2009-03-30T09:09:00.003-05:00

I love this time of year! It's a teeny bit of nice weather those of us in Alabama call Spring! Pretty soon, the humidity will be unbearable and it will be 100 degrees in the shade.

We spent Saturday over at the house of a dear friend, Otis. We grilled ribeyes, I made my famous twice-baked potatoes and we chilled by the lake.

I helped Otis with his computer. Funny how people who work with computers ALL DAY can be in need of help at home! He had so much adware and malware it wasn't even funny.

I downloaded him some new tunes, (he has Poison and Elvis on the same CDs!) I think I got him caught up to 2006, maybe 2007!

Here's to Spring! It will only be here another week or so!

I WON! I WON!

2009-03-28T21:15:00.003-05:00

You know, God really has a sense of humor. I totally believe it.

As some of you followers may know, it's been almost 9 weeks since Mr.X punched me in the chest and threw me and my two boys out of the house. There has been no sex for this chick for a WHILE!

I hate to admit it, but the sex with Mr.X was not the best I have ever had, but I was totally smitten with Mr.X so it didn't seem as important but.........

Girls, if you are dating a guy who 'wants it' less than you do from day ONE, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!

On THAT note...I have won a very special contest Tenakim was having!

I won $65 from Eden Fantasys !!

Now...what do I want?? I have a purple JackRabbit I got in New Orleans, the Blue Bullet... I will let Mr.X keep that one, it's really his.

So what shall it be??? Any suggestions???

I have a Disorder

2009-03-24T11:23:00.003-05:00

I will come right out with it. I have Silent Tourette's Syndrome.

You read that right...SILENT Tourette's syndrome. It's where I am in a situation, usually alone and alone in my thoughts and a thought comes to me and I scream in my head "F*CK YOU!". But only in my head.

Then a while later, I will see something that reminds me of a life I once had and I scream in my head, "YOU MUTHER F*CKER!"

I have been told that this affliction is normal and will pass in time, just as long as I don't start screaming the obscenities out loud. Although, I can see that happening in the right situation.

Stupidity usually brings it out in me, so I apologize in advance. My divorce is probably going to drag on for a while, a year maybe. After that, I should be cured!

I believe....

2009-03-20T10:30:00.007-05:00

My friend Terri once dragged me to a New Age Festival in town. I had no idea what was in store for me, but I was open to anything as I was going through my first divorce after 15 years of marriage.

I ran into a Tarot Reader who sat me down in front of her and started shuffling her cards. I cut the deck and she started laying the cards out in front of me.

Reader: "Wow, I see your divorce. Has your husband ever hurt you?"
Me: "No", I laughed at the thought. My first husband never even spanked the kids, he would never lay a hand on anyone.
Reader: "But I see violence, I want you to be careful, be very careful."
Me: "Okay, I will."
Reader: "I don't usually tell my clients that their marriage will never work, but this will never work. If I see that things can work, I suggest counseling. You can't repair this marriage."

I knew that my marriage wasn't working, after all, we were getting a divorce. I was confused at her obvious concern, knowing my husband, but I took her advice and was careful.

Now I am beginning to wonder if she wasn't seeing my current marriage instead. It fits, the violence, the threats, the fact that my marriage cannot be saved by counseling. Marriage counseling only works when both people want to save the marriage. Mr. Ex apparently has too many things suppressed deep down inside of him and I think he is actually afraid of therapy. He wouldn't even go when his daughter was seeing someone and needed help. I am hoping that the judge may order an evaluation like in the comment of my last post. I think it will help his relationship with his daughter and if he ever decides to share his life with someone else.

The best part of my reading was the end, after all the warnings...

Reader: "Just be very careful, please listen to me."
Me: "I understand."
Reader: "Ahhhh, and the last card, The Family Card. Here is the family you always wanted. Here is your family."

I always thought she meant Mr. Twisted and his daughter. Now I know that wasn't the case.

Who knows what she saw. Maybe she saw me and my 2 boys and Opal. Maybe she saw someone who wouldn't lie to me, keep secrets from me. Maybe she saw someone who would appreciate all that I have to offer.

I do know that I am on the right track. Instead of the sorrow someone would normally feel about a failed marriage, I feel hopeful and happy, looking forward to the future.

Happy St. Paddy's Day!

2009-03-15T09:11:00.004-05:00

I am going on a mini vacay with my 2 boys so I am posting a wee bit early.
Opal is One Lucky Pup, but some of us are not so lucky.

By conservative estimates, 1.5 million women in the United States are assaulted by their intimate partners every year. (Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, National Institute of Justice and Centers Disease Control and Prevention, July 2000)

Domestic Violence includes a wide range of abuse, including:

* Physical Assaults
* Sexual Assault
* Psychological abuse
* Threats
* Intimidation
* Emotional abuse
* Isolation
* Manipulation of children
* Economic control
* Destruction of property or pets

A recent national survey of 8,000 women found that women whose partners were jealous, controlling or verbally abusive were significantly more likely to report being raped, physically assaulted, and/or stalked by their partners. "Having a verbally abusive partner was the variable most likely to predict that a woman would be victimized by an intimate partner." (NVAW Survey, July 2000)
(Information provided by Harriet's House)

If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, get help. If you don't think you need help, if you think it won't happen again, read this blog, Violence Unsilenced.

Opal has a Boyfriend!

2009-03-11T12:54:00.002-05:00

There is this cute little Puggle who lives down the street. His name is Rocket and Opal has fallen in love with him. She sits on her porch and waits for him to come jogging down the street. Rocket's owner is quite fun to hang out with too!!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Here's to Health!

2009-03-08T08:10:00.001-05:00

This is my early update:

Wednesday was my 5th week anniversary of "The Awakening". (Soon-to-be) Mr. EX punched me in the chest and locked me and my 2 sons out of our home.

It's funny that this story says that it took Chris Brown 9 days to apologize to Rihanna. I got an "I'm sorry for the way things ended" voicemail 3 weeks after. That's about it. Guess I will wait for the real apology til Hell Freezes Over. It should be something like, "I'm sorry that I loathe myself so much that I destroy everything in my path."

On the up side of this whole ordeal, I have met the most wonderful people. Caring, generous, thoughtful people.

I decided last Saturday to 'give back'. Since I don't really have anything to give, yet, I decided to give blood.

When they pulled up my info, they informed me that I was a 2 Galloneer! I have given more than that considering I donate to the Red Cross and also LifeSouth, these were just the LifeSouth statistics.

I got this nifty travel mug!

Since I don't have a scale (locked up with Mr.Ex) I will just post my current health stats:

Blood Pressure: 120/80 (waaaaaaay down since "The Awakening")
Cholesterol: 165
Pulse: 68

According to this article, my health should continue to improve!