Obtuse Ruby

FAIL.

2009-05-03T23:35:00.005+01:00

Today for dinner I went to Chiquito with Voodoo Tofu.

I had beef chimichangas. I never had those before and they were YUM!

But the whole time we were eating something was really bothering us.

You see this weekend I got Spanish coach for my Nintendo DS. I learned the simple words like numbers and months. And it came in handy!!

On the way in we noticed they had this poster up for the restaurants 20th Birthday.

Its Wrong! What is up with that?! Cinco is 5!

I'm sure there is a rational explanation. Or not.

Chicken In a Can

2009-05-01T10:44:00.005+01:00

OMG Check this out!!!!

I dont want to have a blog that recycles other peoples blogs, but I feel this is too amazing to pass up. Think less recycling, more passing on the message.

Are you sitting down?

I don't know what to say about this. I am speechless.

What does a chicken in a can look like? I hear you ask.

How does a chicken fit inside a can?

What does it look like when cooked?

Who thought of this heinous insult to all things feathered?

There are so many question that this monstrosity raises.

I don't have the answer to any of those questions but I do have more grim pics....

This is what greets you when you open the can. Bones and Sludge.

*Nauseated*

It is everything it promised to be.

It doesn't even cook nice.
And something tells me they had to break a few bones to fit it in the can.

Euughh. I feel ill.

Original Post: I hate My message board

Lolhamsters - Better than lolcats.

2009-04-28T09:44:00.005+01:00

I learned yesterday that there is such a thing as a giant hamster, actually its a European hamster and they are bigger than a guinea pig and pretty fucking scary if you ask me!

Lucky for me they only live in Belgium, Alsace, Russia and Romania and as I never plan to go to any of those places I am totally safe... Unlike large dogs.

Loyd Grossman Sauce Review...I am kind of bored

2009-04-27T12:29:00.007+01:00

Loyd Grossman Carbonara Pasta Sauce

This sauce was only £1!!!! And I am so grateful for that because it was grim.

I fancied trying this sauce for ages, but it is such a funny colour that I kept assuming it wouldn't be nice. And how right I was!

Disappointment aside; Here is what I thought of it...

Upon opening the lid it looked like something I would expect to see after a curry if you catch my drift. It smelled ok though, it smelled... as expected.

So I started to heat the sauce ready to add to my pasta that was already cooked.
When sauce got hot it had an ODD smell. Kind of medical. Like plasters and hospitals. Like medical grade bacon if such a thing existed.

I had a little nibble to see if it tasted as bad as it smelled and it was like fake bacon taste. Similar to cheap bacon crisps.

So it went in the bin.

There is no way i could have eaten that! And my Mother in Law and Boyfriend agree.

Its ok though because I rescued the pasta with some bacon, peas and a little tomato puree.

So in summary - GROSS.

(insert Loyd Grossman joke here)

If I were you, I would be angry

2009-04-23T11:23:00.003+01:00

I am so bored.

I think you probably came here to read an interesting blog.
Maybe you were looking for a giggle or a few pictures or a fast quip at an unsuspecting celebrity, but I am just whining.
I really cant think of anything to do today.
Well, I can, lots of things, but I cant be bothered.

I have purchased this morning from Asda a Loyd Grossman sauce for pasta. I have to say it really bothers me the way his name is spelled. Blatantly it should be Lloyd Grossman with a double L. Blatantly. I'm sure I'll get over it.

I think it will be gross man.

Check back later for my comprehensive review! haha

Ruby x

People say the funniest things

2009-04-14T10:00:00.004+01:00

On Saturday I was in the newsagents stocking up on chocolate and Relentless. When I got to the counter to pay the assistants were mid conversation about the young ladies laptop(I'll call her Jane). So Jane was asking the middle aged lady (For the purpose of the story we'll call her Brenda)about antivirus software. The conversation went like this;

Jane: "Do you need an antivirus?"

Brenda: "We'll we've got one - Norton"

Jane: "You buy it?!!"

Brenda: "Ooh Yes. You orta get....that....ohh....whas that one the kids 'av got?....ADWARE! Thats it....you orta get that....it's free!."

Who wants to buy my junk?....It's good Junk!

2009-04-09T22:42:00.018+01:00

I posted a bunch of stuff for sale on ebay today.

It took aaaages!!!
I once read in a magazine about a woman who was in a serious amount of debt. So what she did was list everything in her house on ebay. I mean everything.
Although I always wonder, like, if when she had taken all the pictures she listed her camera, and then her computer but I guess that would be dumb!
And I dont remember if she sold enough stuff to cover it. I would assume not. How much could someone bid for a used potato peeler?

So anyway, my house is cramped. And I have some stuff that people have given me over the years that I just dont like for some reason or another.
Usually I worry the person will be offended if I tell them outright I don't like their gift, so I keep it, thinking I will throw it out later, but I never can because I worry the person will somehow find out.

Today I just thought there's no point me having boxes of brand new stuff in my house that I will never use.
One mans creepy doll is another mans porcelain wonder as they say.

So I listed everything I was going to throw in the bin at crazy cheap prices like 40p.

I figured I might make someones day with a bargain.

Please click here if you agree with this statement:
I would like a crazy bargain :)

There was no need for this picture I just thought it would break up the text.
That and I'm selling the shoes too. hehe I'm so sneaky!

Ruby x

I Rigged It To A Car Battery

2009-04-03T11:23:00.001+01:00

Just So Y'all Know

2009-04-03T09:37:00.002+01:00

I baked some muffins today already and its only 930 am.

The mix was only 77p!!

But they taste like a rock.

Meh. You win some you lose some.

I might have posted a picture with this post, if only there were a powerful enough battery made by man to power my Fujifilm camera long enough to transfer the file. Yes that's right I'm looking at you Fuji. *Glare*

The Moment You've All Been Waiting For!

2009-03-31T10:09:00.001+01:00

Introducing my Easter chicken.

I dont think an easter chicken, complete with egglets,and chocolate basket is regular for easter.

So I bought this from Lidl.

If you have not ever had the pleasure of going to Lidl - It. Is. Totally. Hilarious.

I'm not sure if an Easter chicken is a regular thing in Germany or what? I thought the whole point with the eggs and the chicks was to symbolise rebirth. Not that I really dwell on the religious shit so much when I'm shoveling chocolate in my face. But I'm not sure a clapped out old hen gives the same message.

I bought her a few weeks ago and I have to admit that she is now *ahem* ...deceased.

I didn't mean to eat her so fast.

Or all in one go.

Honest.

Monday is...SHOW AND TELL

2009-03-26T10:19:00.003Z

See this new thing I am doing...

Monday Show and Tell

I thought you guys could submit to me a picture and a few words about something neat you bought/have/happened and I would post them all on Monday to brighten the day a little.

And you could rate them and comment and stuff like that.

So I'm gonna need some Show and Tells to post this Monday.

Submit yours to Mondayshowandtell@hotmail.com

See you over here on Monday.

I'm so excited!!

Ruby x

Ladies and Gentlemen...

2009-03-23T10:34:00.005Z

Post does not require a title.

2009-03-19T12:51:00.005Z

Do you have an Easter Chicken. No. No you dont.
Dont judge me. You could never understand.
Maybe one time I will show you my Easter Chicken.

But not if you are going to be mean about it?

Q:What kind of hamster?

2009-03-11T11:10:00.012Z

I saw these hamsters in a local petshop and I just thought they were so adorable!!!

But the silly pet shop labeled them as Syrians!!

I'm not sure what they are but I'd really like to find out so I can learn about them and maybe get some.

If you know what kind they are comment or mail me at ObtuseRuby@hotmail.com

Ruby x

Pleurisy sucks so bad.

2009-02-24T11:15:00.005Z

BBF's -

2009-02-23T19:19:00.007Z

Bandanas are pretty cool.

I made it from scratch!

2009-02-21T16:43:00.004Z

1 in 10 historians agree

2009-02-20T12:55:00.004Z

Catching up

2009-02-17T11:13:00.006Z

I was aiming to post daily - I haven't posted for 3 whole days.
This is very disappointing!
But lets get things in perspective here. No one cares.

First for a little update on the dentist situation. My teeths are A-OK. woohoo...
I have got to get a funky mouthguard to wear at night though.
Who says I'm not sexy :D
I took my time walking from the dentists room to reception so I could read my notes. I wonder if they know I do that? The funky mouthguard is because of Nocturnal Bruxism. Sound cool huh!?

Also reasons for no postings these last few days, is VALENTINES DAY! wohoo and also MY BIRTHDAY!!
yay for me!

I am 20 years old now.
Old being the operative word.

Why did I spend my entire childhood wishing to be an adult and now I feel that it would not be so bad to be 18 forever.
I honestly feel that death is knocking! And that is so irrational!
Most conversations in my head about my age go like this :

Say if I live 'til 80, I'm a quarter done...
If I make it 100 (which is unlikely) I'm a fifth done...
This 20 years has gone kinda fast, but you don't really have a good concept of time when you are a baby, so maybe the next 20 years will take longer to pass. yeah that would be OK...
What if I get in an accident or get cancer and die at 30 , ARRGGGHHH I ONLY HAVE 10 YEARS LEFT!!!!...
I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die...
SHUT THE FUCK UP.
Ok :(

And that's how it is.

Dental Soapbox

2009-02-13T10:00:00.002Z

Today I have to go to the dentist.
I feel really kind of lame for getting in a state about a dentist appointment but shit. I haven't been to the dentist for a whole year since I had a tooth removed and a another year before that when I had a root canal.
When I was a kid a had this dentist who filled all my teeth , I presume for the money and not for kicks but who knows. He rode a fold up bike and was obsessed with fishing. And then I got this really great dentist who went to Borneo, I think, to do good deeds or something.

After that I had a root canal with an 'excellent' dentist. My face swelled up after the root canal and he wouldn't let me back into the surgery because it was his lunch hour right after my appointment.
Lucky for me my face went down on its own.
I wasnt really cool with that. I never went there again.

I had that root canal-ed tooth out 1 year later. That experience totally finished off any capacity I had to trust a dentist ever again. I had a dry socket...google that if your care and then an infection in my cheekbone, and the hole where my tooth was joined with my sinus, like some kind of facial fistula and the inside of my nose split where they yanked my face around so much.
Oh yeah, I should not leave out that for months afterward the tip of my nose was numb....1 year later my nose only goes numb when I cry! Bizarre.

So if you're still interested in my dental rant I have my 1st checkup in 2 years and when I think about it I feel like I'm going to poop and vomit all at once.

Wish me luck.

Say what?

2009-02-12T14:27:00.002Z

Thought of the day...

2009-02-11T10:00:00.002Z

should I shave my leg hairs, or wait until I can braid them?

The Green Monster of Laptops

2009-02-10T12:38:00.007Z

I have been yearning after a lap top for a good 3 months now, not so long that I have saved any money or decided on a particular model yet, but long enough that I feel an undeniable gaping void left by the laptop I never had and its imaginary uses. You know?

So I figured when my friend told me she got a Nintendo Wii from swoopo.co.uk for £7.50* inc P+P, that this was my chance. My one chance to make £20 stretch to £500.
Totally plausible I hear you say.....

I don't know why I even considered this for a moment! I registered with the thief of dreams aka Swoopo and paid my £10 pounds for a pack of 20 bids.

THEY MAKE YOU PAY TO BUY ON STUFF!!!

At the time (3 days ago – The novelty wore off fast.) I thought this could work out OK, I would just pay £10 for bids, another £20 for a laptop and I would be home and dry.

I found a Macbook for a few pounds and I bid on that, except when you bid the time until the auction ends goes up and so does the price, plus you just paid them 50p to bid, but I was not going to give up that easily, I was sure there was a way to beat the system.

So I bid on a Wii fit board that I didn't even want and have nowhere to put.

Then I got crazy and started bidding on useless crap just because it was cheap. Obviously I did not win any of these as that would be absurd.

When I saw the pop corn maker up for auction I got a crazy glint in my eye. I MUST HAVE IT!! Considering that they sell the EXACT same one at Argos for £9.99 and the postage alone on the auction was £4.90 I bid £4.00. Why.

I used up my last 5 bids on not winning the Popcorn maker.

So I am £10 down and 0 laptops up. Times are bad.

Here is a drawing I did in the aftermath of losing on the Macbook. Dignified.

Ruby x

*Figure is suspected lies / denial.

Doh

2009-02-09T09:59:00.001Z

Good start to the days bloginess. I wrote it. I deleted by accident. end of blog. have a good day now.

Ruby x

weblogblog

2009-02-08T20:47:00.000Z

Web. Log. go.

Intro- 1st weblog, blog ever so here we go.... I'm not too sure about this whole thing, so you will know me as Ruby. And I will be your Ruby.

Ruby x