Marianne Goldweber

Just like you..........

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 14:36:00 +0000

Mirror Mirror on the wall...

Just like our parents- we are the mirror our children look into for who they should be.
'Do as I say and not as I do' is a very basic way of saying that as parents- we must walk our talk. Our children are little sponges, not just listening to what we say- but more importantly watching what we do.

In order to have well behaved, committed and thoughtful children- we as their first teachers must check ourselves and walk our talk.

We tell them to play nice, don't call names, be responsible,don't swear, take care of your things, clean up, save your money, study and work hard, don't bully others, stand up for yourself, stop playing video games and go out and play..but where are they going to see the example of those things? In us.

For instance-
As you cuss someone out for cutting you off in the car?
Or gossiping and passing judgment on others?
Or telling a lie to get out of a commitment?
Or name calling the other parent in front of them?
Or putting wants over needs?
Or getting to work late?
Letting someone bully you?
Not really saying how you feel then talk about it later?

Look back on your own childhood and look at the mixed messages.
We swore we would never do these things, but yet, here we are, becoming more like them than we care to admit.

The biggest thing my son brought to my attention was that I was not financially responsible.

Once our gas was turned off and my son asked why. I told him because I didn't have the money to pay the bill. He reminded me that I just bought him a video game the day before, why didn't I use that money? I told him that I wanted to make him happy
and in his infinite wisdom, he said,
"Mom- hot water makes me happier than a video game."

Out of the mouths of babes.....

Be the mirror that makes your children proud; proud of where they come from and proud of themselves. Be a constant reminder that doing the right thing is not usually the easy thing
; and lead by example.
Letting them know that we're all human and make mistakes is a wonderful opening to some really great conversations..

Be the change you wish to see and your children will be the ripple of tomorrow.

Marianne Goldweber

The Bluebird in my Heart

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:45:00 +0000

Bluebird
Charles Bukowski

There's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I'm not going
to let anybody see
you.

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pur whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that
he's
in there.

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say,
stay down, do you want to mess
me up?
you want to screw up the works?
you want to blow my book sales in
Europe?

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too clever,
I only let him out at night sometimes
when everybody's asleep.
I say, I know that you're there,
so don't be sad.
then I put him back,
but he's singing a little
in there, I haven't quite let him die
and we sleep together like that
with our secret pact

and it's nice enough to
make a man weep,
but I don't weep, do you?

Henry Charles Bukowski (August 16, 1920 – March 9, 1994) was a German American poet, novelist, and short story writer. Bukowski's writing was heavily influenced by the geography and atmosphere of his home city of Los Angeles,
and is marked by an ...emphasis on the ordinary lives of poor Americans,
the act of writing, alcohol, relationships with women, and the drudgery
of work. A prolific author, Bukowski wrote thousands of poems, hundreds
of short stories, and six novels, eventually having over 60 books in
print. In 1986 Time called Bukowski a "laureate of American lowlife."[4]

All the answersd lie within...Om Mani Padmi Ohm.

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 14:54:00 +0000

Children, school, homework, work, laundry, friends,cooking,shopping....
It almost sounds like a Calgon bath commercial..but the reality is that there is not a lot of time for going within.

The stillness- which is taught by many cultures and spiritual schools of thought- is the still place within us where we commune with God..the Source..the Great Mystery.

This communion allows us to silence the distractions from the human world; allowing us to surrender to the ongoing guidance and insight from the world of Spirit.

For me, entering the stillness is like shedding my clothes and immersing myself in a warm bath on a cold day...It is the place where I commune with my teachers- spirit guides and ancestors- It is like going to visit friends who know you so well that there is no explaining, no posturing, no excuses; where communicating is simple and fluid...no words- just thought. Pure love and understanding.

These 'relations' have a much better perspective of my journey- one that most of us rarely take into consideration. Our Purpose..

This communication requires we surrender to the human need to control the outcome and be open to what the Spiritual beings have in mind for our highest and best.

Actually- it's what I wanted to do on this journey- but I forgot when I left the spirit world to be born into this human life. This is actually MY plan for MYSELF. But I forgot the directions on the other side. So I must now stop and ask for direction from those that know me, and my mission, best.

I blogged about an experience I had as a child once......

A long time ago, my Mom took us to Sears, ( hot nuts and hot dogs...yummy...) and we would go to the toy area while she shopped... Well, being who I was, I got bored and went looking for her....panic ensued, and meanwhile she went to the toy section, and I wasn't there....
We spent what seemed to be forever looking for each other.

I was in a panic...then I was running, in all directions, criss-crossing where I had already been out of fear.. Well when we finally saw each other she said "If you are ever lost, just stop and stay where you are and I will find you."

When you are lost, and in a panic, stop... be still and allow yourself to be found, and listen for the guidance to give you direction...

Today...I will enter the silence.I will allow the love of the Universe to wash over me and bring me to a place where there is no fear, no angst; nothing to control or manage. A place where the love is unconditional and the answers are clear....

“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence... We need silence to be able to touch souls.”

Mother Teresa quotes

Marianne Goldweber
www.mariannegoldweber.com

Why Me???...an amazing story.......

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 13:48:00 +0000

It was 9am on September 11 2001, I was watching the 'Today show' and saw the events of 9-11 unfold Live...It wasn't clear at that time, until the second plane hit, that it was an intentional act...I was in the midst of a separation and my soon to be ex husband was working in Washington DC in the vicinity of the Pentagon.

My son was safely at school and I made my way to my retail business, which was on a major street..When I got there- people were literally wandering out of their offices and businesses shocked and close to a panic... My little herb store became a refuge for these wandering souls looking for some understanding.

I was on the sidewalk, when a man came up to me, tears streaming. He came up to me and said "Help me, I don't know what to do." I had some cafe tables and chairs set up on the sidewalk and I sat him down and ran to get a glass of water for him. When I returned, he told me a fantastic story.......

He said, "They're dead".. I knew that a lot of people were dying from this tragedy, but I asked "Who is dead"..He said "My company, everyone."...he sobbed and sobbed....He then told me that he was here in Cleveland on business, he was supposed to fly out the last night, but he missed his flight and was getting a plane this afternoon, and the company he worked for was on one of the top floors at the world trade center,where the first plane hit...
He tried to call, but he couldn't get through..

He said "I'm the only one left- I should have been there this morning...why me?" "Why me"..his words trailed off and his grief overtook him...he could not comprehend why he wasn't there; as if he deserved to be there, not that his life was spared in some Divine way... I couldn't do anything but hold him and allow his shock and grief to fill him and spill over, as his mind tried to wrap itself around the reality that was manifesting...

Time stood still and after an hour or so, as people were reporting the continuing horror to include a threat to Cleveland, as the plane bound for Washington circled us here.(Which was inevitably the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania)we all disbursed;Making our way to our loved ones, gathering our children.... and to the safety of our homes..
As he drove away I offered a prayer for him and his coworkers and for his families safety..I never saw that man again....

Today, as I remember this day in history I recall this man and his words "Why me?"

I hope that in the last 8 years he has discovered the answer to that question on that fateful day when everything for him changed...and I believe, will all my faith, that out of Tragedy, great Triumphs are born....

Marianne Goldweber

Marianne Goldweber: Bullies

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 13:48:00 +0000

Marianne Goldweber: Bullies

A teaching ....the Chameleon........

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 13:12:00 +0000

For a good majority of my life I can remember being one of those people that swam against the stream.I went through life feeling driven to have as many experiences as possible, good and bad. Back in my younger days I did it to make a statement- a dare of sorts. I was out of the box to get noticed, like a bad kid in an extreme way.

Though my awakening I have found that being a creative daring spiritual force is one of the things I have been sent here to learn and ultimately teach through my example.

However, not in the extreme attention getting way ...out of balance.

No longer am I doing it to make a statement. I have come to accept what it is that I love about who I am; that being spiritual, creative, irreverent, risky and unique is what is best for me; and not caring what anyone else may think or say. Accepting who I am and really loving my uniqueness allows others to embrace the light and dark in themselves; to find out authentically who they are, regardless of the environment of which they came.

So many of us are like the Chameleon- changing our color to match whatever environment we may be in. After changing our color for so long- we come to find we may never been aware of what our true color is. Humans, like chameleons, do it for the same reasons, to hide, to camouflage ourselves from the predators. Hiding in fear of being seen and vulnerable.

What is your true color?

My message today is- dare to explore who you really are; Who you are meant to be on this path called Life. And if you don't really know; at the next fork in the road where we will meet, let's take the road less traveled and explore the scenic route together.

So.. what does retrograde mean for you????

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 12:19:00 +0000

retrograde is a phenomenon (at varying times during the year) the planets appear to be spinning backward. So...whatever is retrograde(mercury governs communication) causes effects in people here.
So when Mercury is retrograde all communications are messed up. No one is clear and there are disputes . Mercury stays retrograde for approximately 3-4 weeks. So that would not be a time to do any BIG communicating, like legal battles, divorce, buying anything that requires a contract. It is a good time to reflect.
Now- there are FIVE planets retrograde now...
Neptune - emotion
Jupiter-/the emphasis is upon inner awareness and inner growth. It is an excellent time to get in touch with personal integrity.... Read More
Uranus- the planet of upheaval.
Pluto-When Pluto is transiting retrograde, we are urged to let go of attitudes, thinking or communication patterns, security drives, rigid emotions; a time to undergo an internal form of house cleaning. It is a good time to research into our own Souls

What is retrograde?????

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 17:53:00 +0000

This is a repost from Astrology on the web
http://www.astrologycom.com/retro.html

Retrograde Planets
Retrograde Planetary Cycles: 2009

This article explains retrograde motion and outlines the retrograde periods for the planets as they dance through our cosmos in 2009. There are links to our main retrograde motion articles, which cover the actual meanings of the retrograde phases of the personal planets, as well as the effects of the annual movement of the two Great Chronocrators, Jupiter and Saturn.

A planet is described as retrograde when it appears to be moving backwards through the zodiac. This traditional concept arises in the illusory planetary motion created by the orbital rotation of the earth, with relation to other planets in our solar system. It's a bit like travelling on the road watching another car beside you: when the other car slows down, or you speed up, it looks as though the other car is moving backwards. So planets are never actually retrograde or stationary, they just seem that way, due to this optical illusion. Click here for more on the science of retrograde planetary motion.

Retrograde periods, although often problematic for us earthlings, are not particularly uncommon. Each planet retrogrades, except the Sun and Moon. As a rule, retrograde planets presage a period of seemingly inevitable or fated events, which relate to their sphere of influence. They present us with a series of events over which we seem to have little or no control, relating especially to the sign in which the retrogradation occurs. For example, transiting Pluto retrograde in Capricorn presents quite different sets of circumstances from those generated when it retrogrades into Sagittarius.
Ancient Astrologers at Work
Planetary Stations

A retrograde period is best seen as a cycle, which begins when the planet begins to slow to a halt before travelling backwards through the zodiac and ends when the planet returns to the point where it first paused. However, during the cycle, the planet's energy is most powerful (and more likely to generate critical events of universal importance) when the planet makes a station, appearing motionless in the sky. These stationary periods occur at the beginning of the cycle (when the planet first halts as it prepares to move backwards) and midway through the cycle when the retrograde planet slows to a stop before moving forward again.

The planetary direct station (when the retrograde planet seems to halt before moving forward through the zodiac again) is a time of significant power when matters to do with the energies of the planet, house and sign can be favorably activated. The few days either side of this time are ideal for making or implementing decisions in the nature of the planet, sign and house concerned. In particular, the stations of Jupiter and Saturn are important with regard to longer term intentions.

Remember that the outer planets turn retrograde every year for quite some months, so it is not at all unusual to have one or more of them retrograde in one's own personal chart. This is not necessarily unfortunate and the key issues of destiny in such a case depend largely upon the aspects to the retrograde outer planets from the inner personal planets and points.
Thoth, Egyptian Mercury
Current Retrograde Movements

Mercury Mercury usually turns retro three times a year, but in 2009, it's four! Click for more.

Venus Venus retros every eighteen months, in 2009 from March 6 to April 17. Click for more.

Mars Mars turns retro only once every two years. Click for more.

Jupiter Jupiter from June 15, 2009 until October 13, 2009. Click for more.

Saturn Saturn from December 31, 2008 until May 17, 2009. Click for more.

Uranus Uranus from July 1, 2009 until December 1, 2009. Uranus in Pisces

Neptune Neptune from May 29, 2009 until November 4, 2009. Neptune in Aquarius

Pluto Pluto from April 4, 2009 until September 11, 2009. Pluto in Capricorn

Note:
The Moon's North and South Nodes (the Dragon's Head and Tail) are normally retrograde in their movement through the zodiac. The Nodes are not actual planets, but rather sensitive points, or "shadow planets" that have a powerful influence comparable with planetary strength. The True Node from time to time turns direct in motion for a few days, due to the phenomenon known as the Moon Wobble; such direct periods are generally considered unfortunate. The Mean Node is always retrograde, as the "Wobble" is averaged out for convenience. Read more about the Moon's Nodes.

Retrograde Planetary Cycles

* Mercury
Retrograde 24 days
Stationary approx. 3 days

* Venus
Retrograde 42 days
Stationary approx. 11 days

* Mars
Retrograde 80 days
Stationary approx. 20 days

* Jupiter
Retrograde 120 days
Stationary approx. 10 days

* Saturn
Retrograde 140 days
Stationary approx. 10 days

* Uranus
Retrograde 150 days
Stationary approx. 16 days

* Neptune
Retrograde 160 days
Stationary approx. 16 days

* Pluto
Retrograde 160 days
Stationary approx. 16 days

Vampires amoing us.......

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 17:26:00 +0000

I had a very busy weekend, working with a lot of different people.
But the same message prevailed throughout the day;
Love is setting boundaries- helping can be enabling people to be destructive to themselves and to us, personal accountability means leaving people behind and loving yourself is imperative to loving others.

So, after such a busy day I had a dream last night It was disturbing enough to keep me up for over an hour in the middle of the night.

In my dream I was at an office building. It was being infiltrated by vampires. I had to escape the building, while trying to awaken people around me to the vampires existence without drawing attention to the fact that we were onto them. Inevitably- the vampires took us as hostages and I had to lead an escape with a few folks who were in agreement.
My goal was to get to my son- who was at my sisters house.

I wasn't sure if the vampires were outside the building- or how far reaching their invasion was- so I had to intuit and be observant to behavior that would indicate that they were not regular people. The rest was a like a Rambo movie- dodging and fighting the undead- narrowly escaping, and having to leave the injured or weak behind.
I finally arrived at my sisters house where our families were together- my brother and his children as well. I looked through the window to see them all dancing and having a fun time. Except my brother in law- who was acting like he was having fun and dancing- but he was really now one of the undead.

I came into the house- and pretended that I didn't know my brother in law was different. I said cheerily that I had to leave and tried to get not only my son, but my sister and the other children to come with me as well. It was then my brother in law attacked me- I was under him on the floor and had my hands around his neck. I could feel that his skin was cold and he had big fangs...then I woke up.....

This is how it is interpreted.
I feel that in my work I am trying to awaken others, and protect my loved ones.. I'm trying to teach others about these 'vampires',how to be aware of them and how to 'escape' their need to feed on the weak. Some hear me and follow along but some of the people are naive and oblivious and they have to get left behind and suffer because they won't set a boundary or they are afraid to change.. I am not attached to their fate. I am doing this for my loved ones- and even in my inner circle there are 'vampires among us'- even though they play along and think they have us fooled.
I feel under attack- but I also feel that it is a never ending battle of boundaries strength and faith to champion the light against the darkness.

"Dreams are a powerful tool that the soul employs
to commune with the divine- to sort out and shift our perception.
Then we can see the higher purpose of our waking daily life."
Marianne Goldweber

Amazing Grace- History

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 21:59:00 +0000

I love the song Amazing Grace.
Divine Grace is described as; 'enabling power sufficient for progression'. Grace divine is an indispensable gift from God for development, improvement, and character expansion, and without God's grace, there are certain limitations, weaknesses, flaws, impurities, and faults (i.e. carnality) mankind cannot overcome.
I know that in spite of me and the the things I have done in this life, the Universe has given me wonderful blessings and the ability to change.(Grace)
So with that- I am posting the wikipedia description of where the song amazing grace came from and a wonderful video from II Devo...

Video

John Newton and the lyrics to Amazing Grace
Search Wikisource Wikisource has original text related to this article:
Amazing Grace

John Newton, the author of the lyrics to Amazing Grace, was born in 1725 in Wapping, London, England.[1] Despite the powerful message of "Amazing Grace," Newton's religious beliefs initially lacked conviction; his youth was marked by religious confusion and a lack of moral self-control and discipline.[1]

After a brief time in the Royal Navy, Newton began his career in slave trading. The turning point in Newton's spiritual life was a violent storm that occurred one night while at sea. Moments after he left the deck, the crewman who had taken his place was swept overboard. Although he manned the vessel for the remainder of the tempest, he later commented that, throughout the tumult, he realized his helplessness and concluded that only the grace of God could save him. Prodded by what he had read in Thomas à Kempis' Imitation of Christ, Newton took the first step toward accepting faith.[1]

These incidents and his 1750 marriage to Mary Catlett changed Newton significantly. On his slave voyages, he encouraged the sailors under his charge to pray. He also began to ensure that every member of his crew treated their human cargo with gentleness and concern. Nevertheless, it would be another 40 years until Newton openly challenged the trafficking of slaves.[1]

Some three years after his marriage, Newton suffered a stroke that prevented him from returning to sea; in time, he interpreted this as another step in his spiritual voyage. He assumed a post in the Customs Office in the port of Liverpool and began to explore Christianity more fully. As Newton attempted to experience all the various expressions of Christianity, it became clear that he was being called to the ministry. Since Newton lacked a university degree, he could not be ordained through normal channels. However, the landlord of the parish at Olney was so impressed with the letters Newton had written about his conversion that he offered the church to Newton; he was ordained in June 1764.[1]

In Olney, the new curate met the poet William Cowper, also a newly-converted Christian. Their friendship led to a spiritual collaboration that completed the inspiration for "Amazing Grace," the poem Newton most likely wrote in Kineton, Warwickshire[citation needed] around Christmas 1772.[1] The lyrics are based on his reflections on an Old Testament text he was preparing to preach on, adding his perspective about his own conversion while on his slave ship, the Greyhound, in 1748.

Newton's lyrics have become a favourite for Christians, largely because the hymn vividly and briefly sums up the doctrine of divine grace. The lyrics are based on 1 Chronicles 17:16-17, a prayer of King David in which he marvels at God's choosing him and his house. Newton apparently wrote this for use in a sermon he preached on this passage on New Year's Day 1773, and for which he left his sermon notes, which correspond to the flow of the lyrics[2]. (He entitled the piece "Faith's review and expectation.")

The song has also become known as a favorite with supporters of freedom and human rights, both Christian and non-Christian, in part because many assume it to be Newton's testimony about his slave trading past.

The hymn was quite popular on both sides in the American Civil War.

While on the "Trail of Tears," the Cherokee were not always able to give their dead a full burial. Instead, they sang a translation (or rather, paraphrase) previously made by Samuel Worcester.[7][8] For this reason, many contemporary Native American musicians have recorded the song.

Marriage

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 14:20:00 +0000

One of the things I love about being a minister is officiating at weddings. This is my "wedding season" and I typically perform at least 10 or more from May to August. Some are intimate; on the beach, just the couple and I- and some are elaborately planned and orchestrated, like a Broadway show.

The reasons for getting married are also as diverse as the ceremonies themselves.

But what ties them all together is the natural need to partner with someone who is all the things we are not; that we love, admire and respect...

Like the Yin and Yan the two halves come together to create the whole; both remaining separate enough to be unique to the self-
but complete enough to create the circle.

So it is with Marriage.
The differences between us creates integrity to the whole.

Sometimes along the way we forget that the differences in our partner and ourselves is the beauty of marriage- and we become critical of these same differences that attracted us in the first place.
Which creates a division in the whole.

Today- let's remember that gratefully our partners are very different from ourselves and those differences are what we fell in love with.

Maybe use this as a reason to reflect on your own relationships, and remember the beauty of having someone to share this journey with.

I am blessed to have received the following writing from my spirit guide, which I use in part, in the ceremonies I perform.
It is directed to those who are entering the covenant of Marriage.

Marriage,- Running Bear
In our single-mindedness, our perception is one dimensional.
As we find balance within, we begin to see that we are not meant to travel alone, that in partnering, we gain the insight of another who we admire love and respect.

It gives us that which we do not see in ourselves-
this creating a balance of its own.

You have come together on this path,
now each with a new perspective;
able to see with each others eyes,
Love with each others hearts.

Each of you bringing into this journey gifts to complete the whole-
each in balance.

So as you gift yourselves to one another always remember to:
See with the others eyes, for they are now your own.
Love with the others heart, for it is precious and belongs to you too.
Hear with the others ears for now you hear with knew understanding.

Be thankful, for some in their search are not perceptive enough or cannot step out of themselves to appreciate the journey shared.

So go forward and Love with one heart,
treat it as your own, for it now belongs to you.
See with four eyes, to gain knew perspective.
Hear with new clarity and walk in peace on your journey together.

Gluing the soapdish- a story about diversion

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 14:32:00 +0000

I left home at a pretty early age, vowing I would never be back.
But-less than a year later I found myself between apartments and unemployed. The girl I moved out with found out she was pregnant and need her share of the rent and utilities for an abortion- and then decided that living on her own was not for her and she moved out.I was left with all the obligation. Then to make matters worse I mutually agreed with my employer to leave my job as a telemarketing phone room manager.

For a short time and I had no choice other than to humble myself and move back to the place that brought me so much unhappiness, my childhood home.

I immediately fell into a fit of depression, staying in my pajamas all day, giving up looking for work and an apartment. Subjecting myself to the internal critic of failure; in addition to the external punishment for failing, by my passive aggressive mother- who never actually called me a failure but treated me like one through snide remarks and superior references.
The changing moment for me was a day that I use in teaching to this day.

I broke a ceramic soap dish in the kitchen one morning. Everyone was at work or school, and I spent the entire day doing nothing but piecing and gluing together this dime store soap dish. Minutes turned into hours; I lost all sense of time in the pursuit of perfectly gluing my little project back to it's original form.

At 4pm, my sister arrived home from school and found me still in my pajamas; the house around me a disaster, and me fervently bent over my diversion for the day.

She said "Marianne what the hell have you done all day?? This place is a wreck and mom is coming home in an hour?? You're still in your pajamas for chrissake"

With pride in my accomplishment I held up my work of art and said "I glued the soapdish!!"
She said "Are you high??"
I said "No, but look, it's perfect."
Then reality crept in- "What the hell have I been doing all day???"

She snapped me back into reality as I looked around me- looked at myself and thought this is not who I am.I found a job and an apartment in the next week.

When the reality of life gets too painful to look at we all create diversions to keep us off the really important things. I have a friend that makes spreadsheets that he never uses, and another friend that uses garage sales and eBay as a diversion from life. Creating the illusion of doing.

These activities stop us from looking at our own itinerary, our own to do list and keep us from seeing the need for change our life.

What's your soapdish?

Saying no is a loving act

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 13:42:00 +0000

One of my favorite books is the Four Agreements- by Don Miguel Ruiz.
One of the Four agreements is "Speak with Integrity"

Saying no is not something that was honored in my family- there were no personal
boundaries, I was never heard. So I had a very hard time not acting out of
obligation. Which eventually made me very resentful.
My mother did things for people because "You may need them someday" so all
giving was with condition. If you were the recipient it was lorded over you-
even if it was repaid.

I have found that saying no and not obligating myself to things I do not want to
do is a loving act toward others and myself.

I only obligate myself to things and people that I'm REALLY on board with-
unconditionally. Then there is no resentment.

When I am doing something that I don't want to be doing - everyone knows it- I
am pouty and curt- and act like it's their fault like I'm doing them some big
favor....lol

Saying no has also allowed people who I enable to find another solution. To do
it themselves- or- they find someone other than me to take advantage of.

At first it felt like I was saying no to everything, but I was committed to a
lot of things I was resentful of. But now- I only commit to things that I can
perform 100%-with joy and unconditional service.
Marianne Goldweber
www.mariannegoldweber.com

My Ego is not my Amigo

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 19:20:00 +0000

I have had a huge issue with authority my whole life.

I enjoyed making myself self important and dishonored others to feed my insatiable ego and need for control.

I have found that it is my insecurity and arrogance that made me want to be the superstar or savior- not because of my desire to do a good job, but to do a AMAZING job to rub it in your face or to make someone else look and feel inferior.
It was my way of sucking energy, gaining attention; otherwise known as Bullying.

I hated being disrespected and therefore I gave no respect.

I have applied the following exercise brought to me by my spiritual teachers.
1. I write down 3 things I can criticize about the person I am observing.
2.Then I write down 3 things I like about them.(Much harder)

In front of each write "I am"

I can't change others- but I can change that behavior in myself. I can relent to do what I am told- because everyone has a different way to do things- not just my way.
Being a good follower is just as important as being a great leader.

My need to be right, or powerful or in control is my insecurity.

Steel Horse

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 04:12:00 +0000

Steel Horse

Wind in my hair astride my steed
Ancient memories of great prairies
Abundant with Buffalo
Majestic mountains
Gold grass waving
Freedom in the wind
Over ancient lands
Colors magnificent
Warrior pride
The days of wild ponies a memory
The horse is steel
The spirit lives
The ancestors in the wind call my name.

Marianne Goldweber
(Inspired on a cross country trip)

Read more: http://www.gaia.com/quotes/topics/marianne+goldweber#ixzz0K4WkveKe&C

Spiritual Warrior

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 15:07:00 +0000

Our society uses labels to define people and things. I have struggled to define myself using these societal labels but finally have decided that one of them is Spiritual Warrior.
I searched the internet and found an amazing writing by Ryan Androsoff that describes exactly how I perceived myself.
I emailed him and was honored that he responded and gave me permission to use his inspirational piece in my blog...
This is for all the spiritual warriors out there.

The Spiritual Warriors Creed

I am a Spiritual Warrior.
Love is my only sword,
Faith my only shield.
Truth my only map,
Wisdom my only commander.

I stand for all that is good, I protect the light.
I reject all that is evil, I conquer the darkness.
My wars are not fought on the battlefield.

Wherever there is ignorance, hatred, suffering or fear I wage war.
Wars not fought with bombs and bullets.
Wars where blood is not spilt or lives destroyed.
Wars fought only with truth and light.
Wars where evil is conquered and darkness destroyed.

I fight for no country or army.
No leader, money or power.
I fight for the spirit of creation.
I fight to clear the way so it's love and goodness
may once again embrace all creation.
I do all this selflessly and with humility.

I cleanse my body, temple of the creative force.
I live in harmony with all things.
I resist temptation and embrace enlightenment.
I vigilantly toil to gain knowledge and wisdom.
And above all I stand firm as a beacon in the night,
for all mankind to follow.
I am a Spiritual Warrior
~ Ryan Androsoff

I wrote it awhile ago now, I believe back in 1996, and it seems to have spread around the internet on a few different websites over the years. The inspiration was my religious/cultural background which is the Doukhobors (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doukhobors), the English translation of which means “Spirit Wrestlers”.
Ryan Androsoff

The Hero Within

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:45:00 +0000

"Every child saved with my help is the justification of my existence on this Earth, and not a title to glory."[9]
Irena Sendler—Letter to the Polish Parliament

In every one of us there is a hero waiting to get out.

Like Underdog- just regular people with a desire to fight for justice,or fairness- or against dark forces; to be a voice for those who cannot speak up for themselves.

Society tells us to 'keep you head down' 'don't get involved' and 'don't rock the boat'.

I'm here to tell you that there is a hero in YOU.

The following is a story about one of these amazing souls that came to this Earth to be a hero. Their praises are not always sung and when they are it is usually after they've died.

Be inspired to be a Hero in your life through Irena Sendler's story.

The little lady above is Irean Sendler. Born Feb 15, 1910 and left this Earth May 12, 2008
She was a Polish Catholic social worker who served in the Polish Underground and the Żegota resistance organization in German-occupied Warsaw during World War II.

Assisted by some two dozen other Żegota members, Irena Sendler saved 2,500 Jewish children by smuggling them out of the Warsaw Ghetto, providing them false documents, and sheltering them in individual and group children's homes outside the Ghetto.[2]
She cooperated with the Children's Section of the Municipal Administration, linked with the RGO (Central Welfare Council), a Polish relief organization that was tolerated under German supervision. She organized the smuggling of Jewish children out of the Ghetto, carrying them out in boxes, suitcases and trolleys.[2] Under the pretext of conducting inspections of sanitary conditions during a typhoid outbreak, Sendler visited the Ghetto and smuggled out babies and small children in ambulances and trams, sometimes disguising them as packages.[6] She also used the old courthouse at the edge of the Warsaw Ghetto (still standing) as one of the main routes for smuggling out children.

The children were placed with Polish families, the Warsaw orphanage of the Sisters of the Family of Mary, or Roman Catholic convents such as the Little Sister Servants of the Blessed Virgin Mary Conceived Immaculate[7] at Turkowice and Chotomów. Some children were smuggled to priests in parish rectories. She hid lists of their names in jars in order to keep track of their original and new identities. Żegota assured the children that, when the war was over, they would be returned to Jewish relatives.[8]

In 1943 Irena was arrested by the Gestapo, severely tortured, and sentenced to death. Żegota saved her by bribing German guards on the way to her execution. She was left in the woods, unconscious and with broken arms and legs.[2] She was listed on public bulletin boards as among those executed. For the remainder of the war, she lived in hiding, but continued her work for the Jewish children. After the war, she dug up the jars containing the children's identities and attempted to find the children and return them to their parents. However, almost all of their parents had been killed at the Treblinka extermination camp or had gone missing otherwise.

After the war and the Soviet takeover of Poland, she was at first persecuted and imprisoned by the communist Polish state authorities for her relations with the Polish government in exile and with the Home Army. While in prison she miscarried her second child and her other children were later denied the right to study at communist controlled Polish universities.

In 2007 considerable publicity[11] accompanied Sendler's nomination for the Nobel Peace Prize.[12] While failed nominations for the award have not been officially announced by the Nobel organization for 50 years, the International Peace Research Institute, Oslo, reported in 2007 that Irena Sendler's nominator had made the nomination public. [13] Regardless of its legitimacy, talk of the nomination focused a spotlight on Sendler and her wartime achievements. The 2007 award instead went to Al Gore, former Vice President of the United States, and the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change.

Sendler's story was brought to light in the United States when students in Kansas found it described in a magazine and popularized it through their original play Life in a Jar.

On April 19, 2009, The Courageous Heart of Irena Sendler, a Hallmark Hall of Fame production written and directed by John Kent Harrison and starring Anna Paquin in the title role, was broadcast by CBS.

Choosing to Suffer...

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 13:55:00 +0000

There is an exercise that I use in teaching explains that
there are 2 kinds of energy- Light and Dark.

We have given these energies labels like good and bad....
God and Evil.
No matter what you call them they are still Light and Dark.

Light is light; you have to reach for it
and Dark is heavy;it pulls you down.

Light is Accountable and Dark Blames.
Light 'gives' and Dark 'takes'.

Light -- Dark

Love -- Hate
Peace -- Chaos/Drama
Joy -- Sadness/Misery
Service -- Selfishness
Accountability/ownership -- Blame/Victim
Faith -- Fear
Compassion -- Judgment

Another way to picture it is Light flows outward- and Dark is like a vacuum- it sucks.
This is why when we are in a good mood- it can be ruined by someone in a dark place in an instant. The dark energy drains us and we own it and allow it and they go away feeling better.
There are people who cannot create their own happiness and are addicted to taking- stealing- energy from others to fill their dark hole.

If we are accountable to our Lives- and see that we make a choice to be in the darkness- we can free ourselves and then set a boundary with others; reminding them that they are creating the suffering.

If they hear the message and want to apply it that is up to them- but if they don't they will soon look for someone else to take energy from and will think twice before they come to you looking for a 'fill'.

So....what side of the road are we operating from?

Be a light spreader-
Let your little light shine!!!!

Faith and Fear

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 15:43:00 +0000

I believe we are here as a soul to have an experience.

Every event in our life- everyone we meet -have been strategically placed in our path in a Divine way to afford us an experience.

When it is a positive experience we can apply Faith that it is Divine.
But- when the experience is senseless and tragic- we have learned to apply Fear and cannot believe that there is anything Divine at work.

Fear is the absence of Faith.

Fear makes us a victim to tragedy- Faith offers us a freedom that it is purposeful in the Divine plan in our life- or the experience of another.

I have experienced many tragedies in my life. In the moment- it is very difficult to think that there is a Divine purpose- it makes me angry- it makes me helpless and it makes me want to control the uncontrollable.

Faith allows me to release my need to know- to control the outcome and be present to the event.

There are many things at work that I cannot understand from my limited perception as a human being. This is where I know- through Faith- that as senseless as it seems- there is Purpose.

In retrospect- I have seen these events inspire significant changes- without them happening, these changes would never have occurred.
Out of the rubble of despair- great things have been born.

Here is the thought for the day-

“There is nothing that wastes the body like worry,
and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry
about anything whatsoever”

Mahatma Gandhi

Animal Messengers in Dreamtime

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:12:00 +0000

There was a time when the members of the Animal tribe were respected and revered and they spoke to us. But, man began dishonoring them and they stopped.

When, in Dreamtime, we meet these animal messengers- If we are aware enough to remember that they can talk, and you talk to them first- they will answer you.

I started to have a re-occuring dream during my spiritual awakening of a Polar Bear chasing me- no matter what dream I was having he would appear and chase me until I awoke afraid.

My Spiritual Teacher at that time reminded me to talk to the Bear...

The next night- while running from the Giant White Bear- I remembered to 'talk to the Bear'.... I stopped in my dream- turned and faced the Bear (scared to death- by the way!) and said 'What do you want?'
The Bear immediately replied 'You're running the wrong way.'

I awoke and realized- I was running the wrong way...I was running from Bear (introspection) afraid to face myself and the life I had created out of fear. White- (the North) a place of wisdom- when at that time of my life I was running from the wisdom I knew- and was being ruled by Coyote- tricking myself...being a victim to the events of my life.

This Messenger came to remind me that if I only look within- apply the wisdom I had- stop running from the message that my life needed and was on the brink of a great change- if I only had the courage to face myself and the illusion I created.

The Medicine Wheel of Life

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 23:32:00 +0000

The cycles of life revolve like the great Medicine Wheel.
Each of us on the never ending circle.
Like Grandmother Moon circles
from dark to full to dark again;
completing her monthly cycle.
As the seasons cycle
Spring
Summer
Fall
Winter
This circle is never ending.

From the time of our birth
that sets our feet on the Good Red Road-
Our mission is one of discovery and learning
as we walk day by day
season by season
around the great Medicine Wheel of our Life.
From Child to Adolescent
From Adult to Elder
the days unfold.

Learning and Teaching
Joy and Sadness
Plenty and Poverty
Love and Loss
The seasons of one's Life pass-
ever cycling.

Awakening us to the experience of living
sharing what we have learned,
and leaving that Legacy to All our Relations.

It then comes time when we must leave the Good Red Road;
a time when we 'Drop our Robe'
and shed this human vessel
that houses our souls for a short time-
and begin our journey on the Blue Road of Spirit.
There we enter the world of our Ancestors,
who rejoice at our return;
While our relations mourn our leaving.

To share what we have learned.
Becoming another spoke
on the Medicine Wheel of Life.

The silent killer.....

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 15:44:00 +0000

When I was in the fourth grade, we had to do a project on the 12 Commandants.

When I got to 'Thou shalt not kill' I was having trouble understanding how this commandment would apply to me. I would never kill someone.
I brought this to the attention of the Nun who was my teacher.
She told me that there is more than one way to kill;
You can take someones life physically,or you can kill them with your words and deeds.

I was severely bullied in grade school- so I completely understood the power of hurtful words and lies.

Gossip and slander are a form of murder.
Not in the physical sense; Gossip is an erosion of one's reputation and self esteem; Sadly- some have taken their own lives over such acts.
Our media is even based on sensational reality programming and true journalism is a thing of the past; becoming judgmental and biased. I heard a local anchor person call someone a jerk.
Refuse to watch- refuse to be a part of such destructive behavior.

Get comitted to your own life and find someone to help.

Let's spend our time talking about the achievements of others.
Let's listen more and talk less.
Let's create lives dedicated to Truth and Love.
Let's spread words of encouragement and stories that inspire.

“What is evil? Killing is evil, lying is evil, slandering is evil, abuse is evil, gossip is evil: envy is evil, hatred is evil, to cling to false doctrine is evil; all these things are evil.
And what is the root of evil?
Desire is the root of evil,
Illusion is the root of evil.”

Buddha (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)

This Road called Life.........

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Thu, 21 May 2009 14:07:00 +0000

There is no destination on this Road.
It is constant awakening, and reawakening,
discovery after discovery.
Awakening is like waking up after a long nap
and feeling like you have been sleeping your life away;
caught in the mundane rituals of living.
The learning process on this road is never finished.
There is no Master degree, there is no certification.
There is only the point where we Cross over
to the Blue Road of Spirit
and look upon this life
and see the beauty and magnificence
of it in the Great Web;
Of the lessons learned,
and the Lives touched.

Two wolves- Our greatest teachers

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Mon, 18 May 2009 14:06:00 +0000

There is a Cherokee poem that refers to two teachers- represented by wolf.
Wolf is the totem animal for teacher- or a teaching.

I always stress that everyone that comes into our journey is sent to teach us about ourselves. Some of these encounters are wonderful and pleasant and some are painful and difficult.

These are the people and situations that teach us the most.

I have had many teachers that have appeared on my journey but one in particular has challenged me to the core of my being. This individual challenges me to search within myself for a solution based not in anger,punishment and revenge; but in understanding, peace and love.. This is where my human/spirit struggle ensues and I have to take everything I have learned on my journey to awakening and apply it here.

It is an internal tug of war- an angel on one shoulder whispering love and the demon on the other whispering hate.

We all have such a teacher- and if you don't you will- these teachers are sent periodically to see if you are healing - if you are walking your talk- to remind you that you are human and evolution is a constant process.

So- I have two wolves in my heart- which one will win?

The one I feed.

Here is the thought for the day-

Two Wolves

An old Cherokee chief is teaching his grandson about life:

"A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

"One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego.

"The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope,
serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

"This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"

The old chief simply replied, "The one you feed."

Relationship Building

MarianneGoldweber@yahoo.com (Marianne Goldweber) — Mon, 11 May 2009 15:45:00 +0000

Change begins with me!
Let's get invested!

When we're in a relationship, whether it's a marriage, a relationship with our children, career or job; we can get caught in the familiarity, and start to take it for granted.
We don't tend to it with the same vigor as when it was new.
Eventually we may find ourselves criticizing our relationship, and the people in it.

Any relationship is like a plant, it needs attention, investment, love, nurturing.

We usually become aware of our own lack of these elements first.
Waiting for these things to be done for us.
If they aren't,we become critical, and begin to withdraw, "separating" ourselves emotionally; looking for reasons to confirm our feelings.

We become a victim.

Lets change our perspective; if we aren't having these things done for us, it also means that we're probably not doing them for the others in our relationships.

We have also taken the situation for granted, we may not be fully invested or loyal.

Since most of you are at work, lets start with that relationship.then You can then try this at home, with kids, wife, husband,or partner later.

First, write down the things that we are dissatisfied with (I'm sure that will be hard!).

Are YOU doing all of these things for the others in your space, unconditionally?

Next, lets change perspective;How are you contributing to this?

Be honest.

Do you have a bad attitude or passive aggressive with you're boss or coworkers?

Are you negative, or usually complaining?

Do you turn in projects in the nick of time? Or procrastinate, scrambling to complete them?

Does everyone know you are unhappy?

Do you work through lunch, work long hours hoping someone will notice your dedication;
as you suffer, silently fuming?

Have you stopped getting dressed up, or stopped putting your best foot forward?

Are you coming in late?

Do you gossip?

This is sabotage, it is destructive. Not only to your own situation, but it spreads your unhappiness like a virus to everyone you "share" it with.

Do you have clear dialogs about your issues/conflicts with the person directly, or do you tell everyone but them?

Lack of Loyalty can be the undoing of any relationship.

It can be the unraveling of any business and can cost jobs.

People and companies can't change what they are doing if they don't know it is an issue.

Clear communication, mature dialog, taking ownership, and apologizing can clear the air.

Let's get honest, and be invested by keeping a positive attitude and speaking our truth.

Maybe we've just not been part of the team. Or, if after setting boundaries, and doing our personal best we are not satisfied, then maybe it is time to find something that will bring you joy.

You can't change people or businesses, get invested and see if it changes.
Find a place that brings you fulfillment.

From the Janitor, to the CEO; we all want validation, appreciation and thoughtfulness.
When we get it, we are willing to give it...
No one wants to do a good job when they aren't appreciated.

You go first and start a chain reaction.

Oh and by the way, feel free to share this with your coworkers.

Have an Awesome Day!

Here is the thought for the day!

The Guy in the Glass by Dale Wimbrow

When you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say.

For it isn't your Father or Mother or wife
Whose judgement upon you must pass.
The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the one staring back from the glass.

Some people may call you a straight shooting chum
And call you a wonderful guy,
but the man in the glass says you're only a bum
If you can't look him straight in the eye.

He's the fellow to please, never mind all the rest
For he's with you clear to the end,
And you have passed your most dangerous test
If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may face the whole world down the pathway of life
And get pats on the back when you pass,
But your final reward will be heartache and strife
If you've cheated the man in the glass.

- Dale Wimbrow, 1895-1954