Diary of a Heretic

Matthew the Action Hero

kathleenmaher — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 13:14:37 -0500

Tara’s reassurance that Brooke would “say yes” transported Matthew King into a state near reverence. Later he would fantasize peeling off her red bathing suit. But now in the elevator to Jeffery’s suite, his fascination and desire for Brooke converged into a jaunty invincibility. Jeffery swung open the door. “You’re cutting this awfully close,” he muttered, laptop in hand. Matthew turned and grinned. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] “Good God,” Jeffery said, “you look like you just brought rain to an arid land.” “Do I?” The conference room resembled a dining...

Matthew's Secret Letter

kathleenmaher — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 17:34:48 -0500

Twenty-four minutes before his conference with Eon, Matthew ducked into a Verizon store on Prince Street and bought a mobile phone with advanced security. Snaking through the crowd, he tried Connie Logan’s number and realized that reception in the Catskills was sketchy. Scarcity of cellular towers was among the mountain area’s fine points. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] With thirteen minutes to go before the hand-shake deal naming Matthew the next James Bond, his home phone rang three times. Tara hurried inside from a canopied deck off the kitchen. “Hello, can...

Amazing Grace

kathleenmaher — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 22:39:00 -0500

Once, after his dad slammed 10-year old Matt’s head against the door to teach him to close the refrigerator so it was sealed shut, his mother pulled him outside the cabin. She draped an arm around him, leading him to the pier. “You know your father loves you. He loves you more than anything.” When Matt asked why, his mom said, “Sometimes the more you love someone the more you demand from him. Like God—the people He loves best, He makes suffer the most.” When Matt’s dad wasn’t hitting him, he sometimes held Matt’s shoulders and whispered, “You’re way too...

Effortless Control

kathleenmaher — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 16:00:58 -0500

Matthew’s hotel suite in New York’s Soho district was sleek, spacious, and sunny. An illuminated flat screen appeared to clone an invisible man. Or that’s how Matthew interpreted the glowing diagrams and scrolling instructions. [Click here to read the first episode, or here to read the previous one.] He showered and shaved and put on a fresh set of James Bond’s tropical clothes. He arranged dinner reservations for him and the co-producer Barbara in the hotel restaurant, since they had moved the meeting from midtown to Crosby Street. But he’d fete her anywhere she pleased, so he also booked a...

Hotel Aloha

kathleenmaher — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 07:12:00 -0500

After graduation in May, 2008, Daisy and I started at Salinger Brothers. The economy had flat-lined; layoffs deluged every bank. But Daisy’s Uncle Bernie was vice-chairman. Typically an analyst’s first year is volunteered slavery: running spreadsheets nonstop for eighteen hours. Thanks to the collapse, however, Daisy and I ran spreadsheets lackadaisically and still pretended to act busy. We left at six o’clock, seven tops. Our goal was to rise at a fabled financial institution and to stand out as stellar beauties on the late-night glamour scene. So even though we made decent enough money, the social aspect required Armani, Dior…Louboutin...

Gender Bending in the Land of Oz

kathleenmaher — Fri, 25 Dec 2009 12:44:00 -0500

This perennial favorite on my blog dates back to the beginning: late 2006. At first, I thought the term “Gender Bending” must be out-moded. But it’s not. Comics, graphic novels, anime, manga—gender bending is popular in print. It will never go out of style in real life—I never imagined that; I merely thought it had acquired a cris new name. Used to be, when I worked at Housing Works Used Book Café , I heard it every day. But that’s been awhile. My New Year’s resolution this year does not rest on the preposterous hope of becoming a better or...

To Everyone Everywhere

kathleenmaher — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 00:00:00 -0500

To Everyone Everywhere: I'm wishing you GLAD TIDINGS and PEACE ON EARTH. (If need be, we will strive for peace throughout the universe after we've achieved it here.)

Sabrina Who Always Believed

kathleenmaher — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 11:53:00 -0500

The ever-changing light, time, and temperature enthralled Sabrina. She marveled at the vibrancy of everything alive and wondered at the imperceptible emanations of everything inert. It astonished her how the atmosphere was layered with sights and sounds. Sabrina delighted in the way things occurred—constantly. Sometimes, just as the world’s magnificence overwhelmed her, its rampant pain and deprivation sickened her. But she was profoundly resilient and her intrinsic joy and gratitude returned soon enough. Was she ambitious? Not so much. She packaged cleaning products gracefully, operated the cash register correctly, and bestowed customers with a bedazzled smile. When she fell in...

Flayed Alive (again)

kathleenmaher — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 10:00:00 -0500

My original post called “Flayed Alive” is almost as consistently popular as the pictures from “The Land of Oz,” by L. Frank Baum, which will show up here soon. How do people find “Flayed Alive, though? It took me almost half an hour and it’s on my blog. True, I’m always losing things, things in practically any category you can name, and I often can’t find them until somebody asks me what I’m looking for. From the other person’s perspective, my lost item or business is right in front of me. However, sometimes my searches for the obvious produce a...

Justifying My Existence (again)

kathleenmaher — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 12:00:00 -0500

From my lost novel, “Diary of a Heretic,” a writing prompt: For years I adhered to the idea that if I lived spartanly and maintained hope, a day would come when I would metaphorically if not actually be invited to speak my mind. And someone would listen. Someone would understand. The way I imagined it: When you were called upon to speak, you were supposed to say why you think you’re alive, why you were born, and why you’re still around: What are your reasons? Everyone needs to come up with his or her own personal answer. After all, no...