In Praise of Curiosity

On Kindness

2018-04-27T10:46:00.003-07:00

kindness

noun kind·ness \ ˈkīn(d)-nəs \

What is kindness? How do we know it when we see it? And why is it important?

The most obvious answer is that kindness is general "niceness" and "courteousness". When someone gives their seat up on the bus to someone who obviously has difficulty standing, we recognize this as a kind act. When a person chooses to remain silent rather than correct another person and embarrass them publicly, we might say that the person is being kind.

But there is a deeper meaning to this rather common phrase.

Poet Naomi Shihab Nye has written a beautiful poem which might be considered an essential primer on kindness:

Kindness

Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.

Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.

Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.

Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to mail letters and
purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.

To truly know kindness, we must first know desolation, loss, fear, and - most essential - abandonment. Kindness, far from being mere niceness or social courtesy, is the state of noticing - seeing - another human soul and reaching out beyond the self and into their lives. Kindness is the messy act of fearlessly entering the story of another and putting our own lives at risk for the sake of their future flourishing. Kindness is a quality we can only embody after being alive in the world having been unexpectedly rescued from the depths of despair. And, given the sheer breadth of our own despair and malaise in this cut-throat and competitive world, kindness, it would seem, is our best and only way forward.

So let us be kind to one another this day and every day thereafter.

Welcome

2017-01-31T12:47:00.002-08:00

Making Gargoyles - Making Disciples

2012-09-04T11:34:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure how the following advert from Exeter Cathedral ended up in my inbox but I'm glad it did. Here's a screenshot:

(source / larger image: http://goo.gl/aoSGU)

Clay Gargoyles? How cool is that? The very idea reminds me of my childhood. No, not my childhood in the shadow of Exeter Cathedral but my childhood as a weird American teen in the early 2000's who thoroughly enjoyed the TV Show "Gargoyles." Check it out:

Weird cartoons aside, I loved the idea of making clay gargoyles in Exeter, England because it helps young people and adults to contextualize their faith through fun and fellowship. It helps people to notice things that they take for granted and spend time considering how they might be made.

It strikes me that - even as youth ministry has been blamed of late for the juvenilization of American Christianity - youth ministry may be uniquely positioned to help people of all ages attend to the unique context(s) in they live out their faith - to notice the cultural artifacts of their towns, families, and churches that often go unnoticed and to consider the significance of these things, people, and relationships for their faith. Making clay gargoyles in the small town of in Eastern NC where I serve as a youth minister wouldn't make much sense but there are many things that might.

I guess what I mean to say is that youth ministry - and church ministry in general - is at its best when it pays close attention (and helps others to pay attention) to the locale in which ministry and discipleship takes place.

So I'd love to hear from you: what does your church do to help youth and adults attend to the context in which ministry and discipleship takes place?

Newbigin on the subversive church

2012-06-13T14:24:00.005-07:00

"Even if it is a very small congregation, and perhaps even especially when it is a small congregation, it can thus become the growing point from which the subversion of the principalities and powers and the first shoots of a new creation can develop." Lesslie

Lesslie Newbigin, Truth to Tell: The Gospel as Public Truth p87 (via newbigin)

Alexander Solzhenitsyn: "If only it were all so simple!"

2012-06-13T08:11:00.002-07:00

"If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?"

Alexander Solzhenitsyn

Thomas Long: "sermons are never actually finished"

2012-06-13T07:18:00.000-07:00

In the past four years in my work as a youth minister in a small town United Methodist congregation, I have been invited to preach roughly twenty times. Each time, I find that my sermons never quite feel complete. I thoroughly enjoy preaching and the process of preparing sermons and liturgy so I've come to enjoy reading what great preachers and theologians have to say on the topic. Thomas Long was one of the favorites in divinity school and I'm looking forward to reading his book, What Shall We Say: Evil, Suffering, and the Crisis of Faith.

This (at least based on the description) is not a book about preaching, per se, but about what some have called "the problem of evil." Questions of why tragedies befall us and why evil persists in the world come up often in my work with young people and this question has often featured in my own preaching. More recently, I have had many occasions to wrestle with such questions in my work as a chaplain intern at a hospital in Raleigh where I live. Suffice it to say, I am eager to read and wrestle with what Long has to say.

Here's an excerpt (stolen from Jason Goroncy):

‘Sometimes people assume that preaching works this way: a preacher prepares a sermon during the week, finishes it at some point – maybe Friday afternoon or Saturday night – and then gets up and preaches the finished product in worship on Sunday. This may be the way it appears on the surface, but experienced preachers know better: sermons are never actually finished. There are always loose ends, questions that could have been pursued in more depth, stones left unturned, intriguing aspects of the biblical text unexamined, thoughts not quite fully baked, an untidiness at the heart of things. At some point, though, preachers have to take what they have, stand up, and speak. Preachers do not preach because the sermon is finished; they preach because it is Sunday. The time has come.

That sermons are never finished is actually a good thing. Sermons get presented in incomplete form not because of procrastination or negligence – not most of the time, anyway – but because preaching mirrors the character of faithful theology and of the Christian life itself.

The young people with whom I serve and those whom I've encountered in homes and hospital rooms often ask questions like, "If God is good then why are people so bad" or "If God loves me then why doesn't he answer me when I pray." Often compassionate listening is all I can muster because I have no answers. The same is true of preaching. We cannot possible answer - once and for all - the most pressing questions of our time but we can search the Scriptures, pray humbly for guidance, and then speak with the fervent hope that God's voice will be heard through or, rather, in spite of our own voice. Our theology is always "on the way" and our answers are always incomplete. To paraphrase the apostle Paul, one day completeness will come. For now, however, Sunday is coming and we must listen, reflect, and then speak.

I encourage you to purchase a copy of What Shall We Say at your local bookshop. But if you must buy it online, try purchasing it from Powells or Better World Books.

William Stringfellow on The Body of Christ

2012-06-12T20:54:00.002-07:00

“…The Biblical description of the Church as the Body of Christ living in the midst of the traffic and turmoil and conflict of the world on behalf of the world. The Biblical image of the Church is, to be sure, that of a stranger and alien in the world, despised by the nation, but the Biblical image of the Church is never one of an innocuous, isolationist religious society cut off from the actual affairs of [people] and nations in the World…”

Another World is Possible

2012-06-12T20:24:00.002-07:00

“Our strategy should be not only to confront empire, but to lay siege to it. To deprive it of oxygen . . . with our art, our music, our literature, our stubbornness, our joy, our sheer relentlessness—and our ability to tell our own stories. Stories that are different from the ones we’re being brainwashed to believe . . . . Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing.”

Arundhati Roy

On Violence (2): Holy Satire from the Mouths of Children?

2012-06-11T06:34:00.001-07:00

This morning I read a story about a child who was given an art assignment: create a help-wanted poster for soldiers to fight in the Crusades. Admittedly this is an odd assignment. In response to this assignment the unnamed 7th grade student created an image of a man wearing a Jesus name tag that depicts Jesus in the place of Uncle Sam saying, "I want you to kill all infidels." The phrases “meet me in Jerusalem” and “get a free ticket to heaven” are also written at the bottom of the poster. Some parents have expressed outrage over the image.

I'm not sure what exact angle this teacher was hoping her students would take in this assignment but I'm sure she didn't bargain for the image you see below. No matter how one interprets this image, it is a disturbing image. But I think it's disturbing for all the right reasons.

I obviously do not know the young person who made this image nor do I know why he drew it. What I do know is that in my American context, this simple image calls into question and makes light of the often unspoken marriage between Christianity and militarism in America. And this is no small feat!

American political culture has often devolved into a breeding ground for xenophobia and paranoia and voices of reason and clarity are rarely heeded. We do not trust our neighbors who think differently and we are suspicious of those who worship differently than we do. Even worse, many of us have come to think of entire ethic and religious groups as inherently evil. The implication that Christians may somehow be implicated in violence and hatred toward those with whom we disagree doesn't sit well with us.

Intentionally or not, this drawing juxtaposes the image of the Christ who is known as the prince of peace with the quintessential image of American militarism. Congratulations unnamed 7th grader! You've just made a ton of Christians in American uncomfortable and for that, we salute you!

On Violence (1)

2012-06-10T14:50:00.001-07:00

...or, "Why are we okay with A Game of Thrones but not 2 Samuel 8?"

Last week I inadvertently began reading 2 Samuel 8 when I intended to read 1 Samuel 8. This was an honest enough mistake but what I found shocked me. I must admit (rather sheepishly) that I have never read 2 Samuel all the way through and somehow (again, ashamedly) I have managed to avoid passages like chapter 8 entirely. Throughout my undergraduate and graduate studies in church history and theology, I somehow missed how violent the Bible can be. I'm sure I knew theoretically that much of the Hebrew Bible contained stories of Israel's conquests and eventual occupation of "the promised land" but I never put two-and-two together until very recently.

What I've discovered (again, it's nothing new to people who've been better students of the Bible) is that a fairly large section of the biblical story is occupied with what we would now consider to be genocide and indiscriminate murder of men, women, and children at the hands of the house of Israel -- all of which occurs by divine command. Needless to say, this has caused a bit of a crisis for my biblicist tendencies.

Image Source

Let's set aside for a few moments my obvious biblical illiteracy (again, much to my chagrin) and focus on the reality of the violence in the biblical narrative as compared to violence in other stories. The question that I have is this: why are so many Christians today squeamish when it comes to the violence in the Bible when so many of us (myself included) so eagerly consume stories of violence presented in film, literature, and pop culture without the same misgivings? Is it just because we believe that the biblical text is inspired? Is it that we fail to take the cultural expressions of violence as seriously as we should? I don't know.

Here's an example. I find A Game of Thrones to be very entertaining. I've been reading book one of George R.R. Martin's Song of Ice and Fire series while watching the first season of the HBO series by the same name and I have become completely obsessed with the story I've encountered there. Not only does this show not make me feel the least bit squeamish, I find myself rooting for particular characters and hoping that they will be able to overcome the obstacles they face to crush their enemies and preserve (or repair) their "honor". But when I encounter similar stories of violent conquest in the biblical text my "something just ain't right here" alarm goes off and I am thrown into a flurry of distaste and confusion. What's this all about?

Image Source

I'd wager that many Christians who may find themselves ill at ease with the violence in the Hebrew Bible would be unlikely to say that Christianity is an inherently violent religion. However, many of the same Christians may be quite likely to say that Islam is inherently violent. However, if religious historian Philip Jenkins is correct, such Christians may want to reinterpret their understanding of the Muslim faith. He writes,

[T]he Bible overflows with "texts of terror," to borrow a phrase coined by the American theologian Phyllis Trible. The Bible contains far more verses praising or urging bloodshed than does the Koran, and biblical violence is often far more extreme, and marked by more indiscriminate savagery. … If the founding text shapes the whole religion, then Judaism and Christianity deserve the utmost condemnation as religions of savagery.

So again, what are faithful Christians to do with the fact that such violence exists and why is it that we are so uncomfortable with violence when it appears in our holy book but so much more comfortable with it when encountered in books, movies, etc.? And what theorists of violence should I be reading to help me wrestle with these questions? (Hannah Arendt's On Violence and Zizek's
Violence: Six Sideways Reflections have already been recommended)

Christological Hermeneutics and Biblical Violence

2012-06-06T09:02:00.002-07:00

Today blogger and Fuller Seminary New Testament professor J.R. Daniel Kirk wrote the following words about "the point" of the Bible for Christians:

What is the Bible and what are we supposed to do with it?

"Inspired" is an answer that many of us give right off the top of our heads:

"Every scripture is inspired by God and is useful for teaching, for showing mistakes, for correcting, and for training character." (2 Tim 3:16, CEB)

But in general we’re not so up on the lead-in:

"Since childhood you have known the holy scriptures that help you to be wise in a way that leads to salvation through faith that is in Christ Jesus." (2 Tim 3:15,CEB)

Scripture is not just about “learning things” that God wants us to know. And it’s not just about finding out “what we should do.” The things we are to learn, and the things we are to do are located within the work of God that has a specific end and goal in view.

We read scripture with full faithfulness not merely when we say, “This is God’s word,” but when we read and interpret it as a witness to the salvation that God has made available to us in Christ. It’s not enough to read the Bible. We have to read it with a Christological hermeneutic.

I haven't read much else that Kirk has written but I find this short post to be some of the most sound advice I could give anyone who finds themselves bored, confused, irritated, or otherwise befuddled with what they find when they read the biblical text.

But I have a problem taking Kirk's advice when it comes to passages such as the following from 2 Samuel 8:

In the course of time, David defeated the Philistines and subdued them, and he took Metheg Ammah from the control of the Philistines.' David also defeated the Moabites. He made them lie down on the ground and measured them off with a length of cord. Every two lengths of them were put to death, and the third length was allowed to live. So the Moabites became subject to David and brought him tribute. Moreover, David defeated Hadadezer son of Rehob, king of Zobah, when he went to restore his monument at the Euphrates River. David captured a thousand of his chariots, seven thousand charioteers and twenty thousand foot soldiers. He hamstrung all but a hundred of the chariot horses. When the Arameans of Damascus came to help Hadadezer king of Zobah, David struck down twenty-two thousand of them. He put garrisons in the Aramean kingdom of Damascus, and the Arameans became subject to him and brought tribute. The Lord gave David victory wherever he went.

I have enough problems with the wanton and at times apparently arbitrary violence displayed by so many members of that "great cloud of witnesses" we find in the Bible. However, what I really find difficult -- no, the word is untenable -- is the assertion of the text that "The Lord gave David victory wherever he went."

How would one read such a text and such an assertion through the "lens" of the life, death, and resurrection of Christ? What ultimate good does such violence do in the context of God's kingdom? I find the question of "what do we do with this text" to be very appropriate because I simply do not know what Christians are to do with the "information" that our patriarchs often appear to be wantonly murderous people who executed thousands (apparently) at the command of God.

I suspect many (if not most) Christians approach this text in one of two different ways:

David was right to lead his armies to attack and massacre entire groups of people because these people were deemed "evil" in God's sight and, thus, we deserving of destruction. David simply carried out God's command.

OR
David acted on his own whims and used his faith in God to justify his actions. These passages belong to a savage and antiquated worldview and really have no spiritual or ethical implications for us today.

I find both of these responses to be profoundly dissatisfying. If we choose option one then any contemporary acts of violence and destruction could be potentially justified if one were to say, "God commanded me to do it." We currently live in a world where the fruits of this sort of interpretation are borne out daily in terrorism and the bombing of abortion clinics (for example). If we choose options two then we might as well ignore just about everything else in the bible since it is (and always will be) all bound to a worldview much different than our own.

So blame on a deficit in my reading on the subject. Or maybe I missed the classes in seminary when we discussed the ethical implications of biblical violence in seminary -- but I just don't know how to read such a text as a Christian without "doing violence" either to to the text or to the way of life to which Jesus points us.

Generational Blackmail or Tepid Pseudo Spirituality?

2012-05-17T05:34:00.001-07:00

Earlier this week, Respected Philosophy professor (and one of my favorite authors), James K.A. Smith blogged the following:

It seems like every other day I'm told another reason why young people are leaving the church: because Christians fight too much, or because Christians are too political or anti-gay or don't care about social justice. Millennials, we're told, are leaving the church because the church won't bless their cohabitation or provide them with contraception for pre-marital sex. They're leaving because they don't care about fights over creation/evolution or abortion or worship style or what have you. In sum, it seems we're regularly informed that if the church doesn't change, young people are going to leave.

And what exactly are we supposed to do with these claims? I think the upshot is pretty clear. Indeed, am I the only one who feels like they're a sort of bargaining chip--a kind of emotional blackmail meant to get the church to relax its commitments in order to make the church more acceptable?

Could we entertain the possibility that millennials might be wrong?

I would agree entirely that millennials are, in fact, wrong on many issues. But I would argue that the reasons listed by Smith above are by no means the most prominent of reasons why young people are leaving the church. It isn't that the church simply needs to "get with the times" or accommodate moral ambiguity. The fact is that young many young people are leaving church because they have come looking for "church" and have found many things -- but authentic christian community is not among them.

What I mean is that young people are leaving because they have been in attendance at church services, Sunday schools, and other aspects of "church" life and instead of finding a community of spiritual depth and Christ-like love that truly cares about its community, they have found too many people over-concerned with gimmickry, social status, self-interest, and self-preservation. Instead of finding a community of authentic worship of God and sacrificial love for neighbor, they have found a community of fear, anxiety, and tepid pseudo-spirituality.

Millenials are searching for authenticity and community and that the church today has, indeed, lost its way. But the problem is not just that the church has refused to accommodate millennials' moral shortcomings by "relaxing its commitments to make church more acceptable" -- it's that the millennials have come looking for a community passionately following Christ in all areas of life and - far too often - we (i.e. Christians) haven't given them what they're searching for. I am not surprised that millennials are leaving church because as I survey the landscape of American Christianity today I don't see that it has much to recommend itself to the next generation -- or any generation, for that matter.

In order to regain the trust of future generations, the church needs to regain its own spiritual vitality, but this will not come through gimmicks, ad campaigns, moral laxity, or any of the other "desperate measures" currently being pursued to stave off the church's decline. If there is to be any hope that the church will regain the next generation, what is really needed is steadfast obedience to Christ's call to sacrificial love and a commitment to be "good news" to our communities born out in concrete acts of service and radical hospitality. We need to be less committed to the "institution" -- our buildings, bulletins, budgets, and social status -- and more committed to Christ and the pursuit of the koinonia that Christ lived, died, and rose again to create.

Upcoming Conversation Partners: Books I’m Reading and Blogging On

2012-05-07T08:00:00.001-07:00

Here's a quick list of books I'm reading and the sorts of conversations I hope to have on this blog (and on Facebook / Twitter) about them. Enjoy!

Teen 2.0 by Robert Epstien – as you know, I've been reading this challenging book and I hope to continue commenting on it in the coming weeks. It's a long read and a lot to take in but it's really changing the way I think about the young people I work with every day.
On the Nook Color:
- Back on Murder by J. Mark Bertrand (of the Bible Design and Binding Blog) – not really sure I'll be blogging about this but it's a darn good read!
- Mockingjay (Hunger Games book 3) by Suzanne Collins
The Jesus Paradigm by David Alan Black – a very surprising book from a Southern Baptist seminary professor at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary. It is challenging many of my assumptions about faith and practice – especially around church practice and national identity. I told my wife the other day, "This is a book that Frank Viola would write if he had a doctorate in theology."
Five Smooth Stones for Pastoral Work by Eugene Peterson – We're reading this as a church staff at Centenary UMC and I must say that it is already been a difficult read for me. I LOVE Peterson's work but it's a difficult book to read on the back end of a unit of Clinical Pastoral Education since Peterson spends much of the introduction critiquing the sorts of "pastoral care" I've been learning about. Recently I posted on Facebook that I believed that students in seminaries should be required to take one unit of CPE before taking advanced theology courses. One commenter accused me of "putting the theological cart before the horse" and compared Clinical Pastoral Education to training in "just another service industry." I replied by questioning how familiar he was with the process of clinical pastoral education and responded, "I doubt, equally, whether you have really studied theology." I began to wonder if I had missed something.
Theology for the Community of God by Stanley Grenz – In light of the above referenced conversation, I decided to return to one the first theology books I ever read to attempt to re-discover "how theology is done." I will be reading this book over the next few weeks and months in an attempt (at first) to reach some understanding of the best "starting point" for theology. I'm looking forward to conversing with folks around this topic.

Prayer of the Day: A Prayer for Being Born (Brueggemann)

2012-04-25T15:20:00.003-07:00

There is a time to be born and a time to die.
And this is a time to be born.
So we turn to you, God of our life,God of all our years,God of our beginning.Our times are in your hand.

Hear us as we pray:
….For those of us too much into obedience,
….….birth us to the freedom of the gospel.
….For those of us too much into self-indulgence,
….….birth us to discipleship in your ministry.
….For those too much into cynicism,
….….birth us to the innocence of the Christ child.
….For those of us too much into cowardice,
….….birth us to the courage to stand before
….….….principalities and powers.
….For those of us too much into guilt,
….….birth us into forgiveness worked in your generosity.
….For those of us too much into despair,
….….birth us into the promises you make to your people.
….For those of su too much into control,
….….birth us into the vulnerability of the cross.
….For those of us too much into victimization,
….….birth us into the power of Easter.
….For those of us too much into fatigue,
….….birth us into the energy of Pentecost.

We dare pray that you will do for us and among us and through us what is needful for newness.
Give us the power to be receptive,
..…...to take the newness you give,
..…...to move from womb warmth to real life.
We make this prayer not only for ourselves, but
….….for our [community] at the brink of birth,
….….for the church at the edge of life,
….….for our [nation] waiting for newness,
….….for your whole creation, with which we yearn in eager longing.

There is a time to be born, and it is now.
….We sense the pangs and groans of your newness.
….….Come here now in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Steven Johnson on Innovation

2012-04-25T12:27:00.001-07:00

Peter Leithart ob Auden

2012-04-24T18:46:00.001-07:00

Incarnation and Art

Leithart on Auden

2012-04-24T18:40:00.001-07:00

Incarnation and Art

The Isolated Generation: No Wonder They Are Leaving

2012-04-23T09:51:00.001-07:00

"For most of human history until the time of the Industrial Revolution, the vast majority of children worked alongside adults as soon as they were able, and they transitioned to partial or full adulthood by their early, mid, or late teens. Even today, many and perhaps even most of the world's children (primarily in developing nations) follow this course…In contrast, in most industrialized countries today teens are almost completely isolated from adults; they're immersed in "teen culture," required or urged to attend school until their late teens or well into their twenties, largely prohibited from or discouraged from working, and largely restricted, when they do work, to do demeaning, poorly-paid jobs…It wasn't until the turn of the twentieth century that the teens years came to be seen as dark and tumultuous and that adolescence was recognized as a separate stage of life that coincided with those years." (Robert Epstien, Teen 2.0, 29-30)

I've written in previous posts on this subject about the idea that young people are competent and have unrealized potential to live meaningful lives of Christian discipleship. Today, I want to talk about two ways in which young people are now isolated from adults within the church and the damage I believe such isolation does to their development as disciples of Christ.

The idea that "adolescence" is a stage characterized by increased emotional and relational turmoil seems to me to be related to the fact that teens today are more isolated from adults than ever. This also seems to confirm the contention made by Chap Clark in his book, Hurt, that young people have been "systematically abandoned" by adults. This abandonment, I believe, takes many forms but one of the most pernicious forms it takes is that of Christian youth ministry as it currently exists.

Here's the reality: many parents have relinquished their God-given role as the primary model and teacher of Christian discipleship for their children. I don't remember what, in the history of youth ministry, came first: the hired youth worker or the parental relinquishment of their primary role in their child's faith formation. To me it doesn't really matter what came first. The point is that one of the principle places where young people experience isolation and abandonment from the adults who care for them is in the church. This is a hard pill for me (and I would imagine most youth workers) to swallow but I believe it is profoundly true that churches hire people like me (professional youth workers) because parents have relinquished their role as the primary teachers of Christian discipleship. This relinquishment has come by way of many cultural forces and I believe that the process that led to the classification of adolescence as a separate life stage is chief among them.

Having said all this, I have come to understand my own calling in youth ministry in a two-fold sense: 1) to provide space for young people to explore Christian faith in a safe and affirming environment and (most importantly) 2) to help and encourage Christian parents to reclaim their families as a vital and transformative space for Christian reflection and discipleship. I am not Catholic but I find that the Catholic catechism has a great deal of guidance to offer regarding the shape of the Christian family:

"The Christian family constitutes a specific revelation and realization of ecclesial communion, and for this reason it can and should be called a domestic church." It is a community of faith, hope, and charity; it assumes singular importance in the Church, as is evident in the New Testament. The Christian family is a communion of persons, a sign and image of the communion of the Father and the Son in the Holy Spirit. In the procreation and education of children it reflects the Father's work of creation. It is called to partake of the prayer and sacrifice of Christ. Daily prayer and the reading of the Word of God strengthen it in charity. The Christian family has an evangelizing and missionary task. The relationships within the family bring an affinity of feelings, affections and interests, arising above all from the members' respect for one another. The family is a privileged community called to achieve a "sharing of thought and common deliberation by the spouses as well as their eager cooperation as parents in the children's upbringing."

In short, the Christian family is to be "a church in miniature." There is a great deal of research out there pointing to the fact that parents are the single most important influence in their children's faith formation. Why, then, do so many churches support and perpetuate structures that keep young people separated from adults? Why in the world do so many churches create what are essentially completely separate worshiping communities made entirely of youth with just a handful of adult volunteers involved mostly for the purposes of "crowd control?" And why do youth ministries reinforce a way of life that separates young people from their families? It makes no sense to me. Youth ministry that does not engage parents and provide space for young people and adults to reflect together on their lives as disciples perpetuates this isolation and reinforces the notion that young people are not capable of real ministry or meaningful service to the church. Parents who do not take a meaningful role in the faith formation of their children miss out in a number of ways – not the least of which is the missed opportunity for them to be intimately involved in the very beautiful work of God's formation of children into faithful followers of Jesus.

In addition to encouraging and equipping families to reclaim their rightful role in the discipleship of young people, churches ought to set the standard for the world at large as places where young people are taken seriously and not simply sequestered into their own pseudo-communities of isolation from their older counterparts (this, I believe, is one among many reasons why young people leave the church after high school). Unfortunately, the way churches and denominations are structured often perpetuates this isolation of youth from adults. If you're in a more "traditional" or "institutional" church, think about these questions:

How many young people are on committees in your church community?
How often do young people participate in worship (beyond the occasional solo or the yearly "youth service")?
How often do young people and adults take part in intergenerational Bible studies or other discipleship activities?
How often do young people and adults take part in mission and service activities together (and do not count the once or twice-yearly "youth mission trip)?

If your church community is anything like many of the churches I've served, you will be hard-pressed to find youth and adults participating in these aspects of church life together. I have, of course, seen good examples of youth and adults working together in the life of the church. I even know of churches that require committees – in order to be considered "functioning" and "in good standing" – to have at least one or two youth members. I would argue that each church committee ought to have as many young people as are willing to serve and that there should be no barriers to youth participation in all aspects of the church's life together.

Youth ministry as I understand it takes very seriously the personal stories and giftedness of each young person and seeks to provide lots of opportunities for young people to be engaged in the church and in the world in meaningful and transformative ways. It involves not merely training our youth to be leaders for "the church of tomorrow" but also helping them understand that they are called to take part in the work of the church today. Youth ministries must advocate for young people and create space for them to take part in the work of the whole church. Youth ministry is not a "church within a church" but is fully a part of the larger community. Youth should be a part of every aspect of the church from its governance and polity to its worship and service. If churches continue to sequester young people and bar them from participation the everyday life of the community, we are going to continue to see them leave after high school (sometimes sooner) and no youth worker or youth ministry program will be able to stop this process unless we take seriously our responsibility to help young people to be fully functioning members of church and society.

I'd love to hear from you. What other ways have you seen this isolation play out? What are your churches doing to strengthen the role of families in youth discipleship? How are they seeking to integrate young people and adults within the church?

If Abram and Sarai had Twitter

2012-04-16T09:10:00.001-07:00

The following is a imaginary twitter conversation that was created by a group of 6^th – 8^th grade youth at the retreat I spoke at this weekend. It was placed onscreen while a member of the group read Genesis 12:1-20. I think it's pretty cool:

OMG12:1-20: @Abe75 pack your bags we're going on a road trip

OMG12:1-20: #thisisgonnarock

Abe75: Me and @LotsaFun are goin on a trip #abesbigtrip

Hater51: @Abe75 you're crazy #abesfolly

SnakeEye: @Rottnegg @MrGumpypants can you believe what @Abe75 is doing? #abesfolly

LotsaFun: @Abe75 @MissSarah ready for the trip!

Supporter21: @MissSarah you go girl!

Sonshine: #Abesbigtrip this is great!

SnakeEye: #Abesfolly is right

MrGrumpypants: #Abesfolly Absolutely!

ImagoDei: #Abesbigtrip sounds like you were made for this

MissSarah: @Abe75 we're out of food #hungry

Abe75: @MissSarah let's head south and see KingP

Abe75: dm @MissSarah you're looking fine - better keep this on the down low (-; *-:

KingP: Just got this fine girl for an ipad and a pack of lollipops

Abe75: lollipops are awesome #full

OMG12:1-20: @KingP big mistake buddy

KingP: I want my ipad back #feelinsick

KingP: @Abe75 Dude not cool she's not your sister #polygamy

KingP: keep the ipad and your "sis" and just get out #anddontcomeback

I am constantly and pleasantly surprised by the fun and creativity with which young Christians approach their faith and work to integrate their faith into their lives. This is just one particularly fun example.
Thanks to Jay Locklear of St. Luke's UMC in Sanford, NC for passing this along to me.

Improvisation, Storytelling and Holy Presence: Worship Words and Young People

2012-04-15T14:08:00.001-07:00

I spent this weekend as the "worship resource leader" at a retreat for around 130 middle schoolers. My duities included curating worship experiences, preaching, spending time with youth, and facilitating a discussion session on the "holy habit" of worship. To be honest, I felt way underprepared going into this part of the weekend. Given my experience with middle schoolers in youth ministry, I was assuming that youth of this age group were not going to be too keen on having a "disccusion" about worship. They'd prefer, I thought, to actually participate in worship. With this in mind, the majority of my time was spent helping the small groups of young people with whom I was working to plan an aspect of the Sunday mornign worship experience and that took up the majority of our time.

However, as I listened to these groups of young people speak about "what worship means to you," I was stunned at the words they were using. One particular exercise asked them to sit in a circle and each person share one "non-church word" that they believed best described what it means to worship. The image above is a "Wordle" word cloud (you can make on here: http://www.wordle.net/) of the top eight words actually used by 6th - 8th graders to describe "the essence" of what worship is all about. The words are fascinating to me for a number of reasons but the biggest is that most of these youth are coming from very "traditional" churches in which words like "improvisation" and "spontaneous" are not likely to show up on a short list of "worship virtues."

Another part of this discussion that was surprising to me was that as much as these young people talked about the "presence of God" they spoke just as much (if not more) about our being present with one another. The word "conversation" and even the word "mutuality" even came up (granted, mutuality was mentioned by a 9th grader...but still). What this means to me is that the way young people understand worship involves openness to God and to each other. It also involves participation!

Young people this weekend constantly bemoaned being "spectators" in worship and, of course words like "boring" and "stuffy" were used to describe their worship services at home. But the more telling responses came when I asked the question "use one word to describe your community's perspective on your participation in worship?" Here are the words they used:

Excluded
Not welcomed
Banned
Afraid
Non-existant
Yeah right!

So it is clear to me that even very young teenagers have the capacity for careful reflection on what worship means to them and that, upon such reflection, they are able to develop a robust and practical understanding of what "authentic" worship is. However, it is also clear to me that many (though not all) young people feel as though their participation in worship is not welcomed.

Of course, this is a small sampling and a very unscientific survey. Nevertheless, it does make me wonder why - in a time when churches are incredibly anxious about the absense of young people from the pews - churches apparently still refuse to provide young people with meaningful ways to participate in their lives of worship. It's a compelling question and one which I am beginning to think deserves more careful research and reflection.

Have you experienced this sort of reflection in younger youth? What about your young people's attitudes about participation in worship? I'd love to hear your comments!

The Infantilization of Young People

2012-04-11T17:22:00.001-07:00

"Young people are capable of making great contributions to society, but they currently have virtually no way of being hear...In times past young people often accomplished great things; it's tough for them to do so in today's America.

When we restrict the rights and activities of young people - say, the more than twenty million people in the United States between thirteen and seventeen, or the more than one billion teens worldwide (more than one-sixth of the world's population) - in some sense we just throw them away, just as much of the world still discards women, the elderly, and various minorities." (Robert Epstein, Teen 2.0, 13)

I once had to send a young person home from on the last day of a youth retreat for fighting. His parents arrived late in the evening and before I could begin speaking this young person's mother began berating me for not "stopping these children from acting like children." I explained to her that she and her child had signed a covenant of conduct that stipulated that "physical violence of any kind will not be tolerated" and that young people who act violently toward one another will be sent home as soon as possible. This mother, obviously very angry with me, then said, "Well what do you expect. You bring a group of kids to the beach and give them a little freedom and they're bound to start beating each other up. They can't handle this kind of responsibility -- they're just kids."

This exchange has haunted me for quite some time. Of course, I was concerned about whether I did the right thing in sending this young man home and I have second-guessed myself numerous times. But the most disturbing aspect of this conversation for me has been the mother's characterization of her fourteen year-old son as "just a child" and of teenagers in general as unworthy of respect and incapable of any amount of "adult" responsibility. Indeed, in her assessment, young people are inherently violent and are unable to be in one another's company absent adult supervision because, sooner or later, they'd just start fighting.

This is disturbing to me because I have seen this same young person engage in real ministry that entailed listening to the needs of others, sharing their faith and life story with others, evaluating complex situations and choose a plan of action, and lead their peers in engaging in ministry. In short, although this young person did get into a fight on a youth retreat that caused him to be sent home early, I have otherwise experienced him to be a perfectly reasonable, competent, and responsible person.

Granted, this mother was probably upset about having to drive two hours away to pick up her son from a youth retreat for breaking our group covenant. Nevertheless, her reaction betrays what I believe is a deep-seeded belief in the inherent incompetence and irresponsibility of young people.

Robert Epstein, in the first two chapters of Teen 2.0, chronicles both the rise of adolescence as a recognized period of life and the ridiculous amount of restrictions placed on young people based not on their competence but on their age. Epstein and Diane Dumas created the Epstein-Dumas Test of Adultness to measure the actual level of restriction that young people and adults face every day. Their findings are rather startling:

"Noninstitutionalized adults scored near zero (2.3 out of a possible 42), but teens outscored prisoners and soldiers by a large margin (26.6 for teens vs. 14.6 for prisoners and 10.9 for soldiers)...In other words, teens appear to be subjected to about twice as many restrictions as are prisoners and soldiers and to more than ten times as many restrictions as everyday adults.

Epstein then goes on to paint a picture of "adolescent turmoil" (the condition that we now call "normal" for teenagers) as inherently unnecessary. He chronicles extensive research into the changing roles of young people even in the last century and shows, rather convincingly, that the level of restrictions placed on young people in 21st century America is historically unprecedented. Until roughly two centuries ago, it turns out, young people began living and functioning as adults as soon as they reached puberty. He believes that this state can be achieved once again by carefully yet swiftly reducing the level of restrictions faced by young people and surrounding them with competent, caring adults who are willing to help them begin to function as the competent, responsible young adult people they already are.

He lists four "enabling premises" that can help adults and young people take initial steps toward helping young people reclaim their place as functioning members of society. I've placed some basic implications for young people in parentheses.

Individuals are unique (i.e., Just because someone is young does not mean that he or she is inherently incompetent. The converse is also true, just because someone is older and has more life experience does not mean that they are automatically able to function as adult members of society.)
People are competent (People should be measured by their competency not by inherent traits that come with their age, race, class, etc. Competencies can be taught and improved over time.)
People have unrealized potential (We should ask what a person's potential is rather than labeling them based on current performance).
Labels are dangerous (Dismissing a young person as "just a kid" is just as dangerous as calling someone "just a black person" or "just a woman." Labels are inherently dangerous and prone to inaccuracy.)

These enabling premises have allowed us to make headway (gradually, of course) toward reducing discrimination toward various minorities, women, the elderly, and the disabled. "Applied to teens, the Enabling Premises have clear implications: teens need to be judged (a) as individuals, not as a group, (b) based on their competencies, not on their age, (c) based on their potential for learning and growth, not merely on their current characteristics, and (d) without disparaging labels such as "adolescent," which imply limits or flaws" (16).

These "enabling premises" will easily resonate with youth workers of various stripes. We are used to seeing the uniqueness of individuals at work, we are used to seeing young people do things that show them to be highly competent and responsible, we are used to seeing young people grow in their faith and their ability to face great challenges with courage, and we are used to seeing the inherent danger in labeling people because labels can be so harmful, limiting and demeaning.

What I am reading so far in Epstein resonates deeply with me because I have long believed that the infantilization of young people is actually partly to blame for stunting their growth into mature followers of Jesus. We expect so little of them because we believe them to be capable of so little and as a result, young people's lives are far too often characterized by unnecessary hurt and conflict, unhealthy levels of compartmentalization, and myriad destructive behaviors. I've seen all this play out in the lives of young people I know and love and, so far, I think I am with Epstien in believing that so much of this is entirely preventable if we will make room for young people to begin to play a greater part in our communities rather than keeping them shut away and sheltered.

So what do you think? Do young people face too many restrictions? Are they capable of so much more than we currently expect of them? Is it time to help each young people seize his or her "inner adult"?

Navigating Adolescence

2012-04-03T09:28:00.001-07:00

Greetings! It has been a while since I last posted anything here but I am wrapping up a couple of projects that have been taking up most of my time so I hope to begin blogging more regularly in the next few weeks (promises, promises...).

Lately a lot of my reading and reflection has taken place at the intersection of pastoral care, faith formation, and adolescent development. Although I have been doing youth ministry for about seven years, I have never given enough of my time to thinking about how the idea of "adolescence" affects my ministry and how I do faith formation. What I mean is that while I understand that young people think and process things differently from adults, I have not given enough thought to the effects of the cultural category of adolescence on the emotional and spiritual lives of teenagers.

Enter Dr. Robert Epstein. I first encountered Dr. Epstien's ideas in 2011 at the National Youth Workers' Convention in Atlanta. Epstein is a research psychologist educated at Harvard and former editor-in-chief of Psychology Today. The area of his work that interests me is his research regarding adolescence. I just ordered and have read the first chapter of Teen 2.0 and I am fairly certain that it is going to rock my world completely. His basic contention seems to be that adolescence is an entirely unnecessary and even harmful societal invention. Young people, he argues, do not have too much freedom, but too little. Young people are not inherently irresponsible or incompetent but are, in many cases, just as if not more competent and capable of responsible behavior than their older adult counterparts. In Teen 2.0, it appears that Dr. Epstein is arguing for a full-scale, society-wide dismantling of systems that delay the transition from childhood to adulthood. And so far, I think I agree with him.

I cannot count the number of times I have encountered behavioral problems in the young people with whom I serve that could - in large measure - be attributed to the infantilization of teenagers and the unwillingness of adults to help them seize opportunities to be competent, responsible young adults. I am thoroughly looking forward to reading through Epstein's 500 + page tome on adolescence and I want to use this space to reflect on the implications of his research for youth and family ministry. So, starting this week, I plan to write a post each week (schedule allowing) reflecting on Dr. Epstein's work and I hope you'll join me in this journey.

Of course, I want to balance Dr. Epstein's work with perspectives from other researchers in this field - especially those whose work has clear implications for ministry with young people and their families. Along with Teen 2.0, I plan to have on hand the updated version of Chap Clark's book, Hurt as well as Soul Searching by Christian Smith, Almost Christian by Kenda Dean, and Sticky Faith by Kara Powell and Chap Clark. Are there other voices you would recommend?

Purchase Teen 2.0 at Amazon.com or, better yet, at Better World Books.

Oscar Romero: "...the violence of love."

2012-02-25T16:30:00.000-08:00

"We have never preached violence, except the violence of love, which left Christ nailed to a cross, the violence that we must each do to ourselves to overcome our selfishness and such cruel inequalities among us. The violence we preach is not the violence of the sword, the violence of hatred. It is the violence of love, of brotherhood,the violence that wills to beat weapons into sickles for work."

~ Oscar Romero

Book Review: Clean Water for Elirose

2012-02-25T16:11:00.001-08:00

My absolute favorite thing to do these days is read to my son, David. David is three now and enjoys hearing all sorts of stories. We read to him from the Harry Potter series (especially the tales of Beedle the Bard), we read to him from the assorted stories of Beatrix Potter (who doesn't love Peter Rabbit) and, of course, we read to him from the Bible - our favorite "version" being the Children of God Storybook Bible edited by Desmond Tutu with full-color artwork.

Our son will learn so much from the stories he imbibe when he is young and that's why I'm so excited about Ariah Fine and Don Robb's book, Clean Water for Elirose, which was one of David's Christmas presents this year. Clean Water for Elirose tells the story of a number of children who all have different favorite things to drink. The book then tells the story of Elirose who, like so many in today's world, lacks access to clean water to drink. The book goes on to tell stories of how children just like yours and mine found ways to help children like Elirose to finance and build a well in their village so they could have access to clean water.

Access to clean water is one of the best defenses that people can have against disease and malnutrition. Clean Water for Elirose is a simple yet highly effective way to teach young children to care about this crucial issue. But it doesn't just want them to care it gives them concrete ways to change the world, one person at a time. Problems like access to clean water are not going to go away any time soon and any resource that helps parents talk to their children about such issues is exciting to me.

My three-year-old, David, talks about Elirose all the time. This, at first glance, may not seem like much. However, the fact that the story of a young girls without access to clean water already has a special place in my son's imagination is not lost on me. As someone who believes that spreading the Gospel of Jesus means both sharing one's faith and addressing the social problems facing the people we seek to love, I find Clean Water for Elirose an amazing resource for other parents hoping to plant the seeds of advocacy for justice in the hearts of their children. I highly recommend it!

You can view a full preview of Clean Water for Elirose by clicking this link. I encourage you to preview it and then to buy it -- it's definitely worth more than the $3.00 minimum donation you'll give for it!

I'd love to know what other resources you have found to help teach young people about similar issues? Feel free to comment below.

The Tall Skinny Kiwi Needs Your Help!

2012-02-25T14:42:00.004-08:00

Andrew Jones has been one of my favorite bloggers since I became aware that there was such a thing as a blogger. For as long as I can recall, Andrew has been writing the Tall Skinny Kiwi blog and his focus in the past few years has been on the growth of new Gospel movements throughout the world.

Though Andrew might bristle at such a designation, I count him as a true minister of the Gospel in the purest sense. His work as I have understood it has been to observe the best practices of the global Christian movement and help readers of his blog find ways to learn to live faithfully in the way of Jesus in their own contexts. Moreover, in his travels he (along with his whole family) has endeavored to equip and encourage missional Christian leaders even as he observes and reports on the best practices of these growing communities.

That being said, the work Andrew does with Christians throughout the world is expensive because it involves a great deal of time and travel. Because of his continual reporting on the work that he is doing and because of his reputation as a committed missional leader of integrity, I want to help him continue his work. And that's where you come in. On his blog today, Andrew let readers know that he is in need of funds for both fuel and for transporting the vehicle that essentially serves as his family's home base to NZ. You can learn more about what Andrew is up to and I want to encourage you to donate at least $10 to help him continue the good work he does of encouraging and equipping missional Christian leaders throughout the world.

Find more info here.