1:18:22 PM: Abu Dhabi built with a “can do attitude”. That and an endless supply of cash.

1:25:50 PM: Daft Punk - Aroung the world playing in the Renault Garage. Summing up their year.

1:32:37 PM: What a turn around, I really want Jakey Wakey do get on the podium.

1:37:06 PM: Jakey Wakey is the new David Coultard.

1:40:58 PM: Is the ‘Karaoke machine’ Eddie Jordan’s euphemism for Louise Goodman.

1:42:44 PM: Stop trying to nail the grid EJ

1:45:13 PM: #F1 Richard Branson drops a fairly big hint he’s switching sponsorship to Manor for 2010. (via @f1fanatic_co_uk)

1:47:20 PM: Come on let’s get on with this massive anti climax.

1:49:29 PM: Who made this ‘ready steady go’ music?

1:56:10 PM: Ron asked if we will see him at more races next year. Rough translation - now Max has fucked off will we see you at more races next year.

1:58:01 PM: We’ve seen the hotel but what about the campsite?

2:13:43 PM: Niaomi still trying to score some coke in the Ferrari garage.

2:26:06 PM: The hotel from above looks just like a <school boy humour edit>.

3:14:08 PM: Dropped off did I miss much.

3:25:38 PM: The Abu Dull Grand Prix at the Yawn Marina Circuit.

3:47:23 PM: “Bastard” & “Fuck” indeed a worthy champion. I think I’m gonna cry.

3:54:25 PM: Can’t belive they found a more annoying cock than EJ.

3:55:19 PM: To be fair the attention craving bell end found them.

4:00:22 PM: Is Jenson wearing kids cap or has his head actualy swollen

4:03:30 PM: I have a sick feeling in my stomach, I fear Terry has won the Fantasy Formula One League. Aaasaaaaargh!

4:05:16 PM: Ahh the Cock Hotel glistening in the background

4:05:34 PM: Pink with a purple end.

4:06:23 PM: RB “he took a piss of my front wing”

4:10:09 PM: Eddie & Coultard say goodbye sounds like they haven’t been confirmed for next year.

Terry is gutted, Kevin is as ecstatic as all such gloryhunters are.

An eventful Brazilian Grand Prix is discussed with the best debut for ever for the japanese weaver, and the boys announce who won anotherf1podcast listener of the year 2009.

Duration: 32:50 Filesize: 30.1Mb | download |

5:28:37 PM: Trulli and Sutil investigated for shit handbags.

5:29:42 PM: The Toyota train has a new driver.

5:30:33 PM: Mama mia wada tha fucka did Trulii saya

5:42:23 PM: #F1 Kovalainen now has three separate investigations going on into his race. (via @willbuxton)

5:55:42 PM: Live blog my arse you work it out.

5:57:37 PM: If finishes like this I guarantee wehear the words “always the bridesmaid…”

5:58:48 PM: And the words “blah blah blah”

6:12:33 PM: Webber has magic plaster on left leg.

6:19:58 PM: It has been pointed out by my learned Mclaren friends that if Brawn hadn’t helped Kovi, Kovi wouldn’t have just fucked him.

6:24:33 PM: Mclaren repay the Button fuel hose favour

6:28:39 PM: Personal bias warning!!! COME ON BUTTON!

6:36:47 PM: AaaaaaaaaaaaAaaaaaaaRghhhhgggg

6:40:03 PM: Sati award goes to Kobeashi.

6:41:40 PM: Stoa no Sotay no Sato ahh bollix Dwunk.

6:47:50 PM: http://www.brawngp.com updated already! #f1 (via @SarahAnnGreen)

6:51:06 PM: Fairytale complete and they all lived happily ever after……

9:06:47 PM: I’m so drunk I don’t recognize my own reflection. GO JENSON!

11:10:19 AM: http://twitpic.com/m3wio - Two emotional team mates after the race… (via @OfficialBrawnGP)

11:11:10 AM: Pleased to see Massa yesterday with a spring in his step & a twinkle in his eye. Or have I got that the wrong way around? (via @njharrison)

Terry was in the air and Kevin on his sofa as the Japanese Grand Prix trudded along making it look more and more like Button might do a 2007 Hamilton and not a 2008 one.

Duration: 32:32 Filesize: 44.7Mb | download |

5:46:15 AM: RT @lukewrightpoet wow look at Brundle’s chain. Bet he swings.

5:56:04 AM: Shit! FOA music just woke me from a micro sleep.

6:07:19 AM: Webber does one lap on softs?

6:08:47 AM: Webber in the pits for a wash and wax.

6:11:25 AM: Button sells Kubica the dummy.

6:12:41 AM: 4 laps in Rubens is told not to take any risks, roughly translated stay where you are and let Button catch up.

6:13:35 AM: Webber back in the pits, forgot to get the fags he went in for in the first place.

6:17:18 AM: Vettel is so far ahead he is already standing on the podium.

6:23:52 AM: Andrew Shovlin “can you do kovi if sutils nit in the way”

Button “does a bear shit in the woods”

6:26:27 AM: You can’t polish a turd, but two turds rubbing together will always help your race strategy.

6:26:52 AM: Kovi’s chances of a Force India drive in 2010 just went out the window. #F1 (via @adrianlovell)

6:33:57 AM: Vettel’s pit crew hold him longer than necessary just for a laugh. Rumours circulate the pits that now they’re just taking the piss.

6:37:10 AM: Buemi out? Was he ever in?

6:40:00 AM: Algeshwari “Barrichello’s slowing me down”
Engineer “switch to mix two & shave your eyebrows and you should be able to take him”

6:46:35 AM: Could Hamilton’s race be compromised by shit first stint tyre choices, how very retro.

6:51:48 AM: You say Grojean, I say Piquet. Potato, potato. Tomato, tomato. Let’s call the whole thing off.

6:55:25 AM: Luzzi barges through, I predict a puncture for Nakajima fairly soon.

7:00:33 AM: Webber stops again and is given two more laps of fuel and a free whiskey tumbler.

7:02:47 AM: Heidfelds Jack man filling out his CV forgets to put the car down.

7:05:57 AM: BMW’s topped up with air? Next stop fairy dust?

7:08:37 AM: Trulli up to second after Hamiltion’s car farts out of pits.

7:10:38 AM: Kovi takes Fisi after he forgets he’s not in a Force India anymore.

7:14:52 AM: Saftey car!!!

7:15:40 AM: Algeshwari still trying to drive to the pits.

7:17:19 AM: Barrier looks fucked! Will they have to rebuild it? Race could finish user safety car?

7:19:27 AM: Lewis has to phone KERS helpdesk again.

7:22:40 AM: Webber pits again for a news nose, it wasn’t broken. He just fancied a change.

7:28:19 AM: Grojean gets a bit scared with all the big fast compitent cars all around.

7:29:00 AM: Kubica detemined to go up the back of Button.

7:32:13 AM: It may be the coffee but I’m shaking.

7:37:54 AM: Nobody says “the grand prix” like Martin Brundle.

7:40:27 AM: Ahhhh the corridor of girls.

7:52:15 AM: Shock horror a drivers press conference on the BBC? I must be dreaming.

7:57:18 AM: 1st car Red Bull, last 3 Red Bull.

7:59:20 AM: Oooo Rosberg went green under safety car. Could constructers be decided by the stewards?

8:04:49 AM: Eddie Jordan just said that amongst other thing F1 is about ‘make up’.

Hamilton wins the race, is Button going to be a worthy champion? Will Terry be a worthy fantasy F1 champion, and can Martin Whitmarsh tell a lie?

Duration: 34:58 Filesize: 48Mb | download |

12:37:31 PM: BBC miss popular beat combo The Black Eyed Peas.

12:45:32 PM: How will Rosberg loose out today, cheating, lightening strike, loose unicorn on the track?

12:51:45 PM: Vatenen just barged Bernie out of the way to shake Todt’s hand. He’ll  be swimming with the fishes before the red lights go out.

12:54:50 PM: Have Vatenen and Mosely ever been same in the same place?

12:59:42 PM: The next relative that enters the front room to ask a stupid question gets a Massa spring to the face!

1:11:35 PM: Grojean retires with a head cold.

1:18:56 PM: Grojean “we need to know what’s going with the brakes”. No Roman YOU need to know what’s going on with the brakes.

1:20:52 PM: Glock??

1:27:30 PM: KERS the ultimate overtaking tool…oh hang on

1:28:16 PM: Coffee mug on the track.

1:31:09 PM: Yellow flags waving, if they don’t remove that debris no one can overtake. If they do remove the debris no one can overtake.

1:42:41 PM: Rosberg avoids leprechaun while leaving pits & gets a drive through, unlucky.

1:45:23 PM: Sutil creates his own bad luck.

1:46:23 PM: I know last years race was good but does this one have to be a carbon copy.

1:55:44 PM: I know it’s the least of his worries but when the stewards have finished with Sutil I want a word, the clumsy twat has fucked my fantasy F1

2:00:23 PM: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Glock??

2:04:11 PM: Dirty air…..mmmmm tell me what your wearing.

2:06:52 PM: Trulli demonstrates the true pace of the Toyota.

2:17:15 PM: Brawn “It’s not fair they won’t get out of the way, don’t they know who we are?”

2:26:39 PM: Vettel gets three points on his super license.

2:27:43 PM: Johnny Depp’s let himself go a bit.

2:32:36 PM: Only 3, make that 4 cars out, but this feels a bit like a banger race.

2:35:00 PM: Never has a man in the lead wanted to pit more than Alonso.

2:36:57 PM: *****Personal bias warning****

COME ON BUTTON!

2:37:31 PM: Torro Rosso can’t find a 24hr garage.

2:41:31 PM: Brawn pit crew seem to be wearing cycle helmets.

2:44:14 PM: Right third and final time, Glock????

2:50:53 PM: Thunder clouds emerging from buttons brakes.

2:54:08 PM: I can’t watch, not for the excitement but for the cunts in the front room!

3:01:38 PM: Phew.

3:07:25 PM: Do you think the The Black Eyed Peas went to this race because they knew Massa wouldn’t be there?

I can take it, us loyal fans will.

But now you’ve gone too far, too far indeed. For you’ve upset one very big fan, and if you lose him, well, you might lose me too.

From Philip Schofield’s Twitter earlier today

Just reading about the latest F1 scandal. These dirty dealings and ugly revelations make it very hard to remain a loyal fan.

via Twitter / Phillip Schofield

Proud of yourself Formula One? You’ve hurt a good man.

shame on you

shame. on. you.

uh-oh, looks like Nelson Piquet Snr can stop carving the head off that horse. It’s all over…

or is it?

anotherf1podcast favourite Pat Symonds has been left stuck between a rock (Flavio Briatore) and a Hard Face (Piquet Jr and Snr).

It appears that a meeting did happen, and Pat did say something in it. He is being pretty vague on what.

Taken from James Allen’s blog (which in itself credits The Times) here is the transcript of Pat and an FIA advisor (Jess) at Spa.

We at anotherf1podcast have translated Pat’s responses, in italics…

FIA adviser: In your own words Mr. Symonds what do you recall being said to Nelson Piquet Jnr at that meeting? This is shortly before the race.

Symonds: I don’t really remember it. (Have been drinking since 6am this morning)

FIA adviser: You don’t remember?

Symonds: No. (Hiccup)

FIA adviser: Nelson Piquet Jnr says that he was asked by you to cause a deliberate crash. Is that true?

Symonds: Nelson had spoken to me the day before and suggested that. That’s all I’d really like to say. (It’s much more than I’d like to say)

FIA adviser: Mr Symonds were you aware that there was going to be crash at Lap 14?

Symonds: I don’t want to answer that question. (I want a cigarette)

FIA adviser: There is just one thing that I ought to ask you and put it to you so you can think about it at least. Mr. Piquet Jnr says that having had the initial meeting with you and Flavio Briatore you then met him individually with the map of the circuit. Do you remember that?

Symonds: I won’t answer, rather not answer that. I don’t recall it but it sounds like Nelson’s talked a lot more about it. (Sounds like Nelson doesn’t remember the deal)

FIA adviser: Mr. Piquet Jnr also says at that meeting you pointed out a specific place on the circuit where he was to have the accident and said it was because it was the furthest away from any of the safety or lifting equipment and gave the most likely chance of a safety car being deployed.

Symonds: I don’t, I don’t want to answer that question. (Is it me or is it getting hot in here?)

FIA adviser: [Referring to the pre-race meeting] Was it you that did the talking at that meeting Mr. Symonds?

Symonds: I’m sure it would have been both of us but I don’t know for sure. Sorry that’s a contradiction. I would imagine it would be both of us that would be normal. Actually probably more often it’s Flavio that does the talking himself. I wouldn’t necessarily always agree with what he’s saying but the majority. (I’ll do anything to get out of this… an-y-thing…)

FIA adviser: Because just to be absolutely clear here what Nelson Piquet Jnr has said is that at that meeting it was you that asked him to have a crash deliberately?

Symonds: I can’t answer you. (my mouth is full)

FIA adviser: Can I say that if Mr. Symonds you’d been put in the position where you were made to ask Mr. Piquet Jnr to crash it’s much better, it would be much better for you in the long term to tell these stewards to hear that today?

Symonds: I fully understand that. (But am choosing to ignore it)

FIA adviser: Yes.

Symonds: I have no intention of lying to you. I have not lied to you but I have reserved my position just a little. (I am a russian spy)

FIA adviser: And you’re aware that the stewards may draw conclusions from your unwillingness to assist them in relation to what went on in that meeting?

Symonds: I would expect them to. I would absolutely expect that. (but here’s hoping not)

FIA adviser: I think I haven’t got any further questions. (zzzzip)