Nothing, yet.

Yang memberi itu Dia.

2011-04-12T15:39:00.001+03:00

Mohon doa..

of things i rarely say.

2010-12-25T23:22:00.001+03:00

In The Name of Allah The Most Gracious Most Merciful. By (the Token of) Time (through the ages), Verily Man is in loss, Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy.

as we ages, things get more complicated. when we look back and realized how things changed. how we are not the same person as we were before. and if i can, not to have to care about things that are not about me; i would. but i am not build that way. but i'm learning to be one, for better or for worse.

kalaulah hidup ini ada pemadam, i'll be sure to erase some stuff from my memories, my Book of Life. tapi tak. so here i am, as humble as i can be; I'M TRULY DEEPLY AM SORRY. for all the wrong things i did, for all the wrong words i choose. i'm not going to play the 'we-are-human' card here. human are not that hopeless, are we ?

how i wish things will get simpler day by day. looking at all the fresh juniors, reminds me of the day when we were all eager to learn new things, to discover the new world. rasa tua sangatlah pulak ha ha.

things not going too well with my minor subjects, i do realize that. but i have this feeling like i'm learning everything from zero. life, people, medicine.

take care people. i may not say this to your face, but i do care. sometimes too much, that i end up doing/saying the wrong things instead of doing/saying it the other way around. not too good with words, am i ?

p.s lama dah tak jot some things here, took me more that half an hour for this :-/

2.0

2010-10-30T13:07:00.000+03:00

When you disappoint someone you try to avoid them. Now, when you sin who have you disappointed? You’ve disappointed God. Satan comes to you and tells you what should you do? Avoid Him. The natural instinct of a human-being is when they disappoint someone to avoid them.
—Nouman Ali Khan

2 weeks more, then comes holiday. harap harapnya, things will all go well. or if they get screw up, it's just some minor thing.

welcome winter, rains, beautiful sky, awesome clouds :)

v 1.1

2010-10-11T16:57:00.000+03:00

i secretly did 'that' today.

v 1.0

2010-10-10T20:30:00.000+03:00

rasa berat sangat sangat sangat. tolong jangan tanya lagi, boleh ?

neuro oohh neuro. why am i not attracted to you as i am to mcdreamy ? tsk3

jangan di ikut sangat rasa hati sebab kadang yang itu semua main main saja.

selamat kembali

2010-10-09T01:45:00.002+03:00

dah tukar layout baru. sorry for abandoning you for quite a long time.

i don't quite see a point of writing anymore. at least tumblr give me some inspiration, funny quotes or even stupid jokes to laugh at.

5th year: dimulakan dengan subjek minor. 2 minggu mana cukup nak hafal/faham everything. but that's all i have. jadi, gunakan masa sebaiknya.

p/s it's just me now and no one else. just, me.

of a seagull and a mouse.

2010-05-02T16:57:00.002+03:00

a seagull was flying over a beach, when it saw a mouse. it flew down and asked the mouse: "where are your wings ?" each animal speaks its own language, and so the mouse didn't understand the question, but stared at the two srange, large things attached to the other creature's body. "it must have some illness" thought the mouse. the seagull noticed the mouse staring at its wing and thought "poor thing. it must have been attacked by monsters that left deaf and took its wings"

feeling sorry for the mouse, the seagull picked it up in its beak and took it for a ride in the skies. "its probably homesick" the seagull thought while they were flying. then, very carefully, it deposited the mouse once more on the ground.

for some months afterwards, the mouse was sunk in gloom; it had known the heights and seen a vast and beautiful world. however, in time, it grew accustomed to being just a mouse again and came to believe that the miracle that had occurred in its life was nothing but a dream.

page 86, the winner stands alone by paolo coelho

p.s. do be kind enough to share what you understand from the story above.

allah akbar

2010-03-16T21:57:00.001+03:00

Allahu Akbar; Does it mean ‘God is the greatest’ or ‘God is greater’? It means He is greater. Greater than what? Greater than everything in the world. Everything and anything. Greater than the ‘greatest’.

And we say it so many times during our prayer.

Now I want you to remember this:

When you are about to pray, and all you’re thinking about is that girl/guy, what you’re going to wear, what you want to talk about, then to you, God is not greater. What you are thinking about at that moment, to you, is greater.

So when you utter those words, allahu akbar, and your mind is somewhere else, know that you are a liar.

(via widad)

p.s. Allahu Akbar : god is the greatest !

oh osce/mini-osce surgeri minggu depan. dan paras semangat aku menjunam lah jugak. hesh.

a note to take

2010-02-25T02:52:00.002+03:00

To melt and be like a running brook
That sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart
And give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love’s ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer
For the beloved in your heart
And a song of praise upon your lips.

—Kahlil Gibran

minggu ni di jerash. tak ambil hx sangat. banyak masuk OT. al7mdulillah dapat peluang tgk lap chole dgn inguinal hernia repair on a month girl. pertama kali nampak ovary, fallopian tube segala is amazing !! sub7nallah.

of love and layers

2010-02-21T22:19:00.003+03:00

Here's the thing. We're made of layers, like onions. Some people have more layers than others. Some people have thick, rigid layers on the outside but full of warmth and colour underneath. Some people have their brightest layers to show but all dark inside. When people get to know you they see the first layer, then they decide whether they like you or not. Then if they hang around they'll get to see another layer, and they decide again whether they like you or not. It's all a matter of chances and time. If you get enough chances and enough time people will see you for who you really are. Most people don't. With mothers it's different. Your mother don't see any layers except the innermost. Your core. The one you wear as a little boy. Your mother still sees you as her little boy you once were, and will always do. That's the reason your mother loves you with all her heart no matter what. That's why a mother's love is unconditional. Now, if you feel cold and jaded and empty and drained like you have no love to give, no warmth to share, it's just because you've been spending your love at all the wrong places. You throw away bits of your heart around and you don't get them back. And then you grow these dark, poisonous layers around you and you hide inside them and you scare everything away. Now if you have any love left, the little pieces that remain, the tiny crumbs in the dark, hollow corner of your bitter heart, give them to your mother. If you can't love your mother you can't love anyone. Go home and kiss your mother and talk to her and let her get to know you, get inside your head. And watch your heart grow like sunrise, like the first light in the morning breaking the dark sky and spreads away.

(via deranged)

p.s. in probation to hold my curiosity down a little. don't want to end up like the cat :p

minggu 5: surgeri

2010-02-18T23:59:00.003+03:00

6yo female patient with history of spina bifida operation and recurrent UTI was admitted to the hospital on feb 14th for further investigations. since she was 4 yo, her family started to realize that she is unable to feel the desire to urinate and need to wear diapers since then. she changed her diaper 3 times per day and once per night. there's no change color of urine with no blood. she had rashes, reddish skin with burning sensation at the genitalia and mid thigh area. she had been having constipation (defecate once or none per week). was given laxatives but the problem still persist. she was given antibiotics for her recurrent UTI but did not benefit anything from it. she has no excessive thirst, no decrease in weight and normal appetite. on examination she has abdominal distension on the flank and suprapubic area. underwent multiple x-rays and nuclear image with the last one dated jan 10th shown two focal cortical defect on the right kidney and small with decrease intake and irregular contour on the left kidney with multiple scars. she also underwent cystoscope on feb 15th and was diagnosed with bilateral vesicoureteral reflux (Rt: grade 1, Lt: grade 5) and neurogenic bladder. she will be given botox injection and started on self clean intermittent catheterization.

adik ni di jaga oleh kakak dia. masa hari pertama aku sembang2, kakak dia okay lg. hari esoknya, sembang2 kakak dia ckp tak tidur pun. sebab nak jaga adik dia. hebat, kan ? adik ni jugak sgt cool sebab rajin berjalan melawat pesakit2 lain. bila amek hx ni teringat kat lara, masa minggu ke-3 surgeri. sama diagnosis tp dia dah sedikit besar dan symptom yang berbeza. jadinya, medicine bukanlah black and white. it never is. jadi, sila lah widen your horizon.

sebelum ni aku ingat botox tu untuk cantik, tak nampak tua yang artis2 buat tu. rupanya ada kegunaan lain juga ok. ni la salah satunya. baru tau fungsi dia apa.

minggu urologi agak menarik bagi aku. tapi not my cup of tea kot ha ha. seksa oh sakit urologi ni. kencing tak lawas lah apa lah. fakta menarik: air kencing anda lebih bersih daripada mulut anda. betapa menariknya ciptaan Allah menjadikan sesuatu yang kita rasa kotor (air kencing) tapi faktanya lebih bersih dari mulut yang kita rasa suci kononnya.

dengan tamatnya urologi, maka tamatlah mingu-minggu ketahanan mental di KAUH. 5 minggu secara terus di KAUH memang menguji jiwa tapi manis dan cool tetap ada. dengan dr. muqim papa john yang bajet entah apa2 sampailah senyuman hussein heis (ha ha)

minggu depan, mafraq. nak masuk OT please.

salamat.

p.s. tinggal separuh lagi je surgeri ni oh !

Tetamu Di Dataran Syam - PERTAMA 09/10

2010-02-16T20:45:00.000+03:00

TETAMU DATARAN SYAM
Tetamu di Dataran Syam ini,
Harus gagah seperti Abu Ubaidah,
Tanah yang gersang disuburkan
Dengan darah jihad dan jiwa pahlawan

Di celah pohon yang zaitun yang rendang,
Bersemadi syuhada’ pahlawan Islam,
Menanti dan terus menanti,
Hadirnya barisan waris perjuangan.

Medan ini medan yang susah dan payah,
Sesusah medan Mu’tah di puncak sana,
Dan penghuninya juga harus gagah,
Segagah Kota Karak perakam sejarah,

Di sini lah kau akan membina jiwamu,
Jiwa pembela maruah agama,
Berbekalkan ilmu,berpandukan iman,
Islam pasti akan kau merdekakan.

Ketibaanmu adik-adikku,
Ku sambut dengan seribu pengharapan,
Agar kau menjadi insan berilmu,
Dan pembela nasib agamamu.

Hatimu perlu cekal dan tabah,
Sesabar tiga sahabat Rasulullah,
Jiwamu perlu subur dengan iman,
Sesubur Dataran Syam bertuah.

Kita diajar cintakan kematian,
Bagai musuh kita cinta kehidupan,
Maka di Bumi Isra’ ini tempatnya,
Kau mengenal jihad dan perjuangan.

Tetamu DataranSyam, engkaulah harapan,
Untuk ummah melihat masa depan,
Sebagai ulama’ sebagai pejuang,
Islam pasti akan kau merdekakan,

Selamat datang Tetamu Dataran Syam!

Lagu / Lirik / Nyanyian : Hasrizal Abdul Jamil
Persembahan: Usrah al-Firdaus
Album: Gemilang 1995

tengah mencari mp3, tp tak jumpa. sungguh, lagu ni mampu membasuh hati membuka mata.

a small act

2010-02-07T19:34:00.005+03:00

video yang menyentuh hati (aku)

“Sesiapa yang melakukan kebaikan walaupun sebesar zarah akan tetap diberi penjelasan. Dan barang siapa yang melakukan kejahatan walaupun sebesar zarah, maka dia juga tetap akan diberi pembalasan.” (al-Zalzalah: 7-8)

ingat nak buat post pasal case parotid adenoma last week. tapi, sepertinya agak malas. sepertinya ada sesuatu menghalang. apa-apa lah. nanti-nanti saja.

here's something i wanna share;

5 lessons about the way we treat people

1. First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.
During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:

“What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?” Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50’s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

“Absolutely, ” said the professor. “In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant.. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say “hello.” I’ve never forgotten that lesson.. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2. Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain
One night, at 11:30 P.M., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.

A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960’s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab. She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him.

Seven days went by and a knock came on the man’s door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read: “Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband’s’ bedside just before he passed away… God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others.”

Sincerely,
Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3. Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

“How much is an ice cream sundae?” he asked.
“Fifty cents,” replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.

“Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?” he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.

“Thirty-five cents,” she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins.

“I’ll have the plain ice cream,” he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies..

You see, he couldn’t have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4. Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the King’s’ wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been.

The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5. Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness.

The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, “Yes I’ll do it if it will save her.” As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, “Will I start to die right away”. Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

(via qomaspeakup)

p.s. asyik mental block je dalam round surgeri ni. apehal ?

p.s.s. ruang komen haloscan dah hilang sekali dgn komenan yang lama-lama dulu.

minggu 2: surgeri

2010-01-29T06:29:00.002+03:00

82yo female pt, married with 4 children, non smoker, non DM, non HT came to the hospital from the outpt clinic complaining of painless lump in her lt breast since last year with no discharge. the lump is hard with some nipple retraction, skin dimpling and skin color changes. her appetite decrease since 4-5 months ago. two of her brother had gastric and lung cancer. (source of hx: daughter)

none of all the symptoms are realized by the pt herself besides the lump itself. as it is painless, the pt didn't seek any medical attention. her daughter who brought her to the hospital realized all the above symptoms while she was bathing her mother 3months ago. on examination, there's a palpable axillary lymph nodes.

okay, makcik ni telah menjalani left modified radical mastectomy dengan diagnosis ductal cell carcinoma. makcik ni tak diberitahu diagnosis sebenar oleh doktor dan family. yang dia tahu hanyalah dia ada ghuddeh duhniyyat (lipid lump/lipoma ?) jadi bila ambil history perlu sgt berhati-hati supaya dia tak syak apa-apa yang berkaitan dgn kanser. salah seorang kawan yang ambil history sekali tu tak puas hati sebab makcik ni tak rasa apa. "ma fi ishi bas ghuddeh 3n thuda. ya waja3, ya titla3 ishi minha" (tak ada apa kecuali ketulan je. sakit pun tak, discharge pun tak). surgeon on this case ialah the amazing Dr hussein heiss.

bagi aku, orang-orang tua memang daya tahan sakit tinggi. tak macam budak muda yang sakit sikit kita dah pi hospital. mcm nenek aku, sampai tak mampu nak berjalan, baru nak pi hospital. jadi, kita kena paku dalam kepala, "pain threshold is variable in every person"

"aku dah umur 82 tahun, takkan sakit tulang, sakit kaki sikit aku nak pi hospital. macam kamu-kamu yang muda ni, demam sikit nak pi hospital"

breast cancer is totally curable in the early stage. to those who has the risk factor or family hx of breast or other cancer, bring yourself to the nearest hospital for screening. and ladies, self examination is important.

source

harini group aku dapat dr hussein heiss. excited tak excited !! semuaorg bagi privilege kat dia ok. hinggakan conference room yang dah ada group lain dengan doktor depa pun keluar bagi kami guna sebab dia. sambil doktor tu wish 'goodluck' kat ahli2 group (ha ha).

"ni standard yang budak medik tahun 4, kau tunjuk kat aku ? kalau kau belajar kat france macam aku dulu, bukan setakat doktor suruh kau keluar dari bilik ni, dia suruh kau keluar jami3h tak payah dah datang belajar kalau macam ni punya standard"

sesi harini di akhiri dengan dia tiba-tiba bangun bila sorang ahli group aku tengah present history. dengan gaya "you are not worth my time teaching".

quote terbaik hari ini "look at his face ! he is not that kind of person who smile" Muhammad (budak group aku) bila mana aku cuba menjadi optimis.

ok, saya mengaku doktor, saya tak prepare habis-habisan. tapi suara doktor yang tinggi dan stern itu menyebabkan otak saya mengalami transient ischemic attack. lain kali kalau kita ada rezeki berjumpa, saya akan cuba jawab soalan doktor dengan lebih cool.

yeah, memang berbaloi sesi dengan dia. terasa terbakar motivasi aku nak belajar sungguh2. dan, dia memang ada 3 ciri surgeon. 1- lion heart 2- lady's hand 3- eagle eye.

dalam bilik aku ambil hx ada lara budak perempuan umur 11thn. minggu lepas aku ambil hx dia. complaining of leg pain dgn foot ulcer. tp bila aku ternampak fail dia, dx : neurogenic bladder. muka dia dgn mak dia nampak sedih sangat compared to last week. aku bagi dia coklat sambil ramah2 sikit. nampak dia macam baru lepas nangis je. "Allah yusturna, ensha2llah" tu je aku mampu ckp. moga Allah tabahkan hati mereka yang di uji.

p.s. hari-hari pi hospital ni, macam2 ibrah/dugaan yang nampak true dpn mata sendiri. tak insaf-insaf lagi ke ?

minggu 1: surgeri

2010-01-24T00:28:00.006+03:00

46yo male pt with hx of ulcerative collitis for the past 15 years were diagnosed with colon CA. Underwent colectomy last Sunday. a permanent colostomy is attached to the stoma and pt are NPO (nil per os - nothing by mouth). had hx of diarrhea with mucous and blood for the past 15 years. Since 2 years ago, pt started feeling fatigue, had lost of appetite with significant decrease in weight and his diarrhea had become worst.

ini ialah patient dr.tariq ja'bari yang aku round minggu lepas. i've heard of poo-bag (colostomy/ostomy bag) and stoma before, but never seen one. jadi, aku agak teruja. tapi bila melihatkan muka pakcik itu, aku cuba control keterujaan. satu benda yang menarik ialah, isteri pakcik ni yang sangat supportive and optimis. si isteri ni ikut je dr.tariq mengajar and listen to him all along dan akan tanya a few questions. (would love to see a husband do the same thing to a wife)

kau boleh bayang ke, ayah ke abang ke suami ke or anyone dear to you has to have a poo-bag ? Na'uzubillah.

bagi aku, sakit kat ward surgeri is painful to the pt, family and us (doctors). well, some might say i have not face the worst. and here i am saying, yes i haven't. and to me most of them are.

sakit itu satu ujian dan ujian itu dari Dia. dan setiap satunya sama level dengan mampu nya kita. so who are we to say his pain is not as bad as ours ?

to those who are in pain (physically/mentally/emotionally), remember it's not forever.

nothing is !

“When God is at the centre of your priority in life, you are at the centre of Allah’s swt providential care. But when you displace God, and put substitutes for God in place of God, then you fall on the rung of the centrality of His providential care.”
— Shaykh Hamza Yusuf

p.s

orang orang Mesir- Ya Tuhan, jodoh memang mengalir macam Sg Nil kot kat sana. and im saying here, i will never ever again be surprise if someone is about to get married with someone. yes, i won't !!

orang orang Irbed (sebatch)- selamat ber-rotation yang lain dan semoga cepat sesuaikan diri. yg lepas tinggalkan saja, mula menghadap yang baru ni pulak ok.

adik adik Irbed- selamat bercuti dan sila ingat bawa balik sesuatu untuk saya !!

You make me sad. You think that surgery is gonna make you feel. You think that a successful career is gonna make you happy. You think you know things. You know things, and nothing else matters, no one else matters. People do matter. I matter. We matter. So you don’t get to toss me aside. I won’t let you.
— Owen Hunt, GA 6.12

osce: internal med

2010-01-11T22:48:00.004+03:00

11 jan 2010, 1000am - 2nd group.

1st station (b1): dr mahmoud ayesh

take history from this patient, complaining of cough for 4 months duration. (ddx: ch bronchitis, pneumonia)

sebelum masuk tu, dia bagi duduk kejap depan bilik tu, aku tengok nama kat pintu tu, dr basher khasawneh. dalam hati dah lega, sebab aku memang doa nak dapat dia haha. sekali masuk, dr lain pulak. al7mdulillah dah practice untuk cough a day before and ddx aku dr angguk tp bila tanya lebih2 terus aku jadi diam. dr muqim sangat membantu secara tak langsung dengan jawab soalan aku secara semangat seperti patient sebenar (he he)

2nd station (b2): dr (tak pernah nampak)

do a respiratory exam anteriorly.

agak terkejar-kejar sebab nak kejar masa sampai tertinggal benda-benda yang agak penting. percuss tak kuat sangat seperti arab-arab dan dr duduk jauuuhh terus aku dengar dr cakap "shu ha ?" (apa ni ?) tapi aku terus buat tanpa goyah keyakinan diri (heh) sampai habis. dan ada dr. tanya sikit-sikit.

3rd station (b3): dr khaldoun alawneh

take relevent history from this patient complaining of abdominal pain. (ddx: duodenal ulcer, gastritis)

sempat beramah mesra kejap dengan dr khaldoun. dr muqim yang jadi patient memang dah kenal. selalu nampak dia dan pernah sembang sekali. memang aku selak-selak je buku untuk epigastric pain ni tapi tak practice pun. ada blank seketika sampai tanya soalan entah apa-apa dan dr.khaldoun terus cakap "is'al sual nastafid minha bas" (tanya soalan yang berfaedah dah la.) aku senyum dan dr muqim pun senyum. hahahah. terus dia bagi klu kat aku soh tanya family hx segala sebab memang dah lupa jugak sebenarnya benda penting ni. al7mdulillah. minggu depan pi bagi coklat kat dia lah.

okay, tu adalah pengalaman pertama osce. macam-macam gaya hahaha. kat bilik kuarantin tu dah macam tak cukup oksigen gayanya. ada yang rilek macam tak exam pun boleh main-main, buat lawak bagai. apa-apa pun, moga outcome dia yang terbaik dan tercantik untuk semua. Ameen.

[updated] result dah keluar a day after the exam. efektif tak efektif doktor internal med ni haa. al7mdulillah 3la kulli hal. walau apa yang rasa buat elok dapat kurang dari apa yang rasa buat tak berapa lengkap tu. maknanya, exam praktikal ni kita bukan berurusan dengan sesuatu yang constant. so, tawakkal 3lallah !

mini osce: internal med

2010-01-10T11:35:00.011+03:00

mini osce tadi pagi patut jam 8am, dah la datang lambat terus tak dapat seat best dan tersisih di hujung nun. tak apalah, nasib baik dah bersiap sedia dengan spectacles kan. terus dr. basher kasawneh cakap2 test2 slide nampak ke tak dan bagi no. pulak setiap sorang kat dalam dewan tu. sebut la satu-satu nama. orang semua dah tak sabar nak habiskan je mini-osce ni. dah, kena pulak tunggu.

bila dah siap segala urusan tu, dah ada slide dengan perkataan READY, aku memang rasa macam ada race apa je hahahahah. al7mdulillah dah selesai, walau ada kesilapan yang tak sepatutnya seperti salah baca soalan dan gambar yang seperti kurang jelas dan slide tiba-tiba dah tukar ke soalan lain (ha ha). moga dr. baik hati, lapang bagi markah :)

[UPDATES] with key answers from shifa
1st rotation: group A (156 candidates)

13 questions + 2 history analysis (each slide was around 40sec-60sec. Yeah !)

i- name this conditions

(ans: gynecomastia)

ii- what causes this condition

(ans: liver cirrhosis)

i- name this condition

(ans: xanthelasma)

ii- what is the underlying cause

(ans: hyperlipidemia)

case 3: DM patient come with this condition (gambar lower limb redness)

i- 2 causes of this condition (ans: cellulitis, DVT)

case 4: gambar tangan dengan MCP swelling, pt has dyspnea.

i- name the disease (ans: rheumatoid arthritis)

ii- what causes dyspnea in this condition (ans: lung fibrosis)

case 5: gambar jaundice dengan blood in urine. pt is fatigue and has hx of gallbladder stone.

i- name the underlying cause (ans: hemolytic anemia)

case 6: gambar oral ulcers. pt had painful oral ulcers for 4 months (ni aku salah baca soalan *sigh*)

i- give 2 ddx (ans: behcets disease, IBD)

case 7: x-ray dengan cardio-thoracic ratio more than 50%

i- name this condition (ans: pericardial tamponade/pericardial effusion)

case 8: ECG yang tak nampak lead apa entahlah.

i- name this condition (ans: inferior ST elevation MI)

case 9: blood film

i- name the abnormality (ans: hypersegmented neutophils/macrocytosis)

ii- name the condition (ans: B12 deficiency)

case 10: PFT result

i- name the ventilatory condition (ans: obstructive defect)

case 11: gambar malar rash.

i- name the serological test to confirm the diagnosis. (ans: anti smith Ab, ANA, dDNA)

case 12: pt with hx of SOB, chest pain. opacity on the Xray at the right lower lobe

i- name 2 findings on this patient on P.E on auscultation *salah baca soalan LAGI*

(ans: pleural rub, crackles, bronchial breathing)

case 13: pt has long hx of DM & HT. prominent large jaw, nose)

i- name this condition (ans: acromegaly)

update bersama gambar kalau jumpa lain hari ensha2llah.

history analysis- memang mencabar kewibaan mata dan otak.

case 1: hx of DM & HT dengan segala macam lab test dan vital sign.

i- what is the diagnosis.

ii- name 3 causes.

case 2: hx of DM & HT. pt had acute MI last 6 months etc etc.

i- what is the physical sign you can find to confirm diagnosis.

ii- name 3 causes.

Sekian. Selamat untuk OSCE esok (int med) dan budak2 rotation yang lain.

and All the bestest untuk juniors for your final !!

pre-osce

2010-01-08T20:55:00.003+03:00

sumber

ini ialah pericordium exam ok.

"OSCE tu macam teater. Kita ni pelakon, lepastu kena la hafal skrip dan be prepared to play your part. The difference is, you didn't know which part will you be in. So, just be prepared." — Kak Eli :)

Jadinya, skrip dah hafal ke kawan-kawan ?

berlari untuk menghafal skrip dan body language yang diperlukan.

bye.

Jan 10th, 8am : Mini OSCE (Red Hall) -20marks

Jan 11th, 1030am : OSCE (7th Floor, KAUH) -30marks

p.s. Pray for us !!

MAC OS

2010-01-03T03:29:00.002+03:00

oh i can't help it.

attention: sesiapa yang berada di irbed dan menggunakan MAC OS, sila YM aku atau email ok !

dan, salam tahun 2010.

hidup macamana ? masih di paras yang sama ? kalau ya, ubahlah apa yang patut. hari pertama 2010, Dia bagi aku hadiah special :) gosh, am i not in love with Him. how could i not be. Thanks again, my Love.

OSCE/Mini OSCE : 8 days and still counting. gaya macam tak sabar. salah tu ! sedikit gusar dan kesal untuk yang ini. salah aku, bukan siapa-siapa. tapi sebab nama pun manusia, masih lagi mengharap pada Yang di Atas sana untuk hulurkan rahmah dan bantuan :)

"hidup; kalau kau rasa hari-hari yang kau lalui mudah, itu bukan hidup namanya. mungkin kau sudah mati atau separuh mati. berjaga-jagalah dengan yang mudah-mudah" — Anonim

p.s. ada orang tu cakap muka aku ni, muka dah cop kerja sampai mati. ya Tuhan !

you

2009-12-29T02:20:00.001+03:00

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough “Hello’s” to get you through the final “Goodbye.

— Bob Perks

1.0

2009-12-28T00:32:00.003+03:00

dear people,

i updated my phone's software and apparently all contacts in the phone book are lost. forgive me if i ask "siapa ni ?". i do still remember who you are. it's just that you are not in my phone memory. that's all.

token

2009-12-22T23:30:00.003+03:00

dikir barat

bergegar pentas ok. sirius ! pertama dari kiri, semangatnya !

penat. berbaloi ? mungkin.

bila terlibat dalam sesuatu program ni, memang rasa penat. tapi, bila dah selesai, ada satu rasa puas hati sebab setiap program ada je perkara baru yang belajar. walaupun dah berpuluh program kau jadi ketua biro ke apa ke, tetap setiap satu tu, berbeza. tak percaya ? cubalah.

tadi, aku terlibat dalam Malaysia Day 2009. memang penat macam marathon je rasanya. tapi agak puas hati.

apa yang aku belajar ? tons and thousands of new things. serius !

ada orang tanya, kau tak penat ke dah klinikal pun nak berprogram lagi ? sebabnya ialah rasa yang satu ini lah. rasa puas, penat ni. dan dapat kenal manusia-manusia yang kalau tak, memang tak pernah nampak pun muka !

terima kasih kepada yang terlibat secara langsung dan tidak, dari pengerusi majlis (thanks a lot !), designer pelamin (boleh buka bisnes la lepas ni), pengantin (memang vogue !) dan lain-lain lah. terutamanya ahli jawatankuasa pelaksana. sorry kalau sangat bossy ! kepada yang kat belakang pentas tu, sorry lah kalau melawak terlebih terkurang.

its a pleasure to work with all of you.

p.s tengah tunggu gambar majlis ni ! tapi mesti gambar aku tak banyak. ye lah belakang tabir.

p.s.s bangsa Arab, saya belajar sesuatu yang baru tentang kamu. i used to like them quite a lot.

AJK Pelaksana Malaysia Day 2009

nota: dalam banyak-banyak gambar, gambar aku ada 4-5 je :'(

komunikasi

2009-12-21T01:26:00.004+03:00

teringat dulu masa belajar Bahasa Malaysia (Bahasa Melayu) masa sekolah rendah kecil-kecil dulu, dalam otak aku selalu terfikir mana la asalnya perkataan-perkataan yang kita dok cakap ni (ie: buku, sapa orang pertama yang cipta perkataan tu ?) macam sekarang ni, mustahil la orang dulu-dulu pon cakap "siot ah budak tu !"

bila aku tanya mak (dulu, aku selalu tanya mak je, tak tanya cikgu. percaya mak lebih dari cikgu, la kan) dia cakap, "haa, nanti pi la kaji. amek la course bahasa" time tu, terus orang tanya aku nak jadi apa bila besar, aku jawab "pakar bahasa" ha ha ha. lawak la pulak bila fikir-fikir balik.

tadi, on the way balik dari jam3h. aku terfikir, ke mana lah cita-cita nak jadi "pakar bahasa" tu. jauh betul dari pakar bahasa ke doktor ? tapi bila fikir-fikir balik, tak jauh mana pun.

kalau dilihat, perubatan sendiri sebenarnya ialah salah satu cara badan kita "berkomunikasi" dengan tuan punya badan. kan ? contoh, demam tu tandanya "aku tak sihat ni, ada benda menganggu lah !" (tu badan yang cakap)

tambah pulak, ayat favourite dr. khaled jadallah, "history is horrible. as if it is not our language"

kerja doktor, mentafsir apa yang badan cuba nak cakap. ye lah, bahasa dia bukan sama macam manusia, kan ? dia ada kamus bahasa sendiri. sapa yang cipta bahasa badan ? Yang Maha Mencipta.

p/s nak exam dah pulak, berapa banyak lecture nak kena hadam ? omg ! Allah mudahkan !!

origin of languages, glottogony

yang membezakan

2009-12-15T20:57:00.002+03:00

tak tahu lah, kome dah melihat ke belom benda ni.

'knowledge makes life richer"
jadi dok buat apa lagi ni, pi la mengisi otak dengan ilmu !!

notis

2009-12-11T17:34:00.006+03:00

kepada sesiapa yang nak invitation untuk google wave sila email (haninahz@gmail.com) atau ym saja sama aku okay. i have 27 invitations to hand out.

ok, selamat hari jumaat. sila baca al kahfi !