Playing White Noise/奏でる雑音

2025.05.12

Mon, 12 May 2025 17:37:37 +0900

2025.05.12

Lots of thoughts about lots of things. Looking for a place to share them to the void. Really thinking about coming back to Tumblr. Jury’s still out.

Just spent an hour down the Tumblr rabbit hole of #blackpanther. So excited for this movie, I just...

Sat, 21 Oct 2017 16:14:29 +0900

Just spent an hour down the Tumblr rabbit hole of #blackpanther. So excited for this movie, I just can’t even.

Also, my work firewall blocks Facebook, Twitter, Gmail, and Instagram, but not Tumblr. Whee!

Impulse buy. So. Damn. Happy.

Sun, 15 Oct 2017 08:48:34 +0900

Impulse buy. So. Damn. Happy.

markruffalo: Today we mourn for Las Vegas, tomorrow we fight...

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 03:54:06 +0900

markruffalo:

Today we mourn for Las Vegas, tomorrow we fight for them. Join the movement to end gun violence: Text ACT to 64433.

staff: Is there anything new to say?We’ve been through this far too many times. Please be there for...

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 03:53:54 +0900

staff:

Is there anything new to say?
We’ve been through this far too many times. Please be there for each other, and remember that in the wake of tragedy, there’s always something you can do.
Give blood:
Get help: Events like these shake us, even if we weren’t physically there. The Crisis Text Line is free, 24/7 support for anyone in need. Text START to 741741. Post It Forward will also be collecting personal messages tagged #postitforward, if you want to get anything off your chest.
Get active:
Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence
Coalition to Stop Gun Violence
Everytown for Gun Safety

Sometimes we come to accept the truth slowly. In stages. Sometimes we have reasons to hold on to a…

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 03:52:26 +0900

Sometimes we come to accept the truth slowly. In stages. Sometimes we have reasons to hold on to a lie. We’re not ready to let go of the world that the lie preserves. The people the lie keeps close to us. And we release the lie from our hand one finger at a time.

Ira Glass, This American Life #587 ‘The Perils of Intimacy’

Timing

Tue, 03 Oct 2017 03:48:51 +0900

When unrelated podcasts inadvertently tell me what I need to and don’t want to hear. When a conservation with someone I barely know makes me feel a fraction of how I longed to feel.

I know what needs to happen and it makes me sad. A little empty inside. Just a little. Just enough.

And I actively try to delay it. I stay up late because I’ve always had this strange twisted logic in my head that tomorrow only comes when I wake up. It’s my feeble attempt to stall time.

Because maybe I can still find the answer I want to find. The answer everyone, even the universe, is telling me isn’t there. Just maybe, it was there all along. And we all couldn’t see it. Or maybe it’ll find me instead. It just needs time.

I know. I’m kidding myself. Unhealthy self-delusion digused as hope. I’ll get out of this eventually. I am blessed with friends who are patient with me and have faith in me and love me.

It’s going to be fine. I’m going to be fine.

just-shower-thoughts: People hate to text first because they think they’re annoying, but love to...

Thu, 28 Sep 2017 01:53:22 +0900

just-shower-thoughts:

People hate to text first because they think they’re annoying, but love to get texts first

Cuz being an adult, means sucking it up. And getting on with it. Going to work even if you have a…

Wed, 27 Sep 2017 18:50:12 +0900

Cuz being an adult, means sucking it up. And getting on with it. Going to work even if you have a cold. Because you’re an adult.

An audibly sick Ira Glass (This American Life #585 In Defense of Ignorance)

Just saw a Christmas tree made of deer antlers on TV.

Wed, 27 Sep 2017 09:13:27 +0900

Just saw a Christmas tree made of deer antlers on TV.

『Fuller House』Season 3, Part 1

Sat, 23 Sep 2017 02:13:53 +0900

I literally binge watched Fuller House until well past midnight and am not ashamed to say that I totally enjoyed it.

Now I hope to stay sane tomorrow at work. Time to get some sleep.

「The Confession Tapes」

Tue, 19 Sep 2017 21:55:33 +0900

In continuation of my day off Netflix binge, I’ve moved on to The Confession Tapes and it has done nothing good for my trust issues.

Also makes me want to relisten to the first season of Serial again.

There are as many sides to a story as there are people to tell it. And we, as human beings, are far from being rational creatures. We’re so easily swayed by the emotions that make us so tragically and beautifully human.

All of that faith that I had in reason and logic and fact…I still believe they lead to the truth. Unfortunately, I’m coming to the conclusion that the truth is the not answer because it really doesn’t matter. People will believe what they want to believe. What they feel to be true is their truth.

So I’m glad in a way that I never became that scientist that I might have been because the willful ignorance of truth and facts in favor of something that feels good and sounds right would have driven me mad.

I still have my sanity relatively in tact. Though barely. I constantlywa control my urge to fight what I must admit to myself is a fruitless meaningless battle. Ignorance is indeed bliss. Sometimes I choose bliss and sometimes I choose to face the painful truth. Sometimes I don’t get to choose.

This got way more philosophical than I meant it to be.

Two more episodes to go, then I’m switching to some rom-com anime.

「白ゆき姫殺人事件」

Sun, 17 Sep 2017 23:46:21 +0900

It was on Netflix, so I gave it a go and it was quite good. Disturbing and uncomfortable in the way it was probably meant to be.

My final conclusion is the internet is this perverted fun house mirror of the human condition.

Lady just offered her seat to me on the train, apologizing that she didn’t notice.

Sun, 17 Sep 2017 12:29:30 +0900

Lady just offered her seat to me on the train, apologizing that she didn’t notice.

Is my tummy so pudgy that I look pregnant?(｡-ω-)

Random Mel Fact

Fri, 15 Sep 2017 11:15:33 +0900

I love my strands of white hair. I feel like I shouldn’t, but I do.

Make them want to give you thing you want to take.

Thu, 14 Sep 2017 14:53:10 +0900

Make them want to give you thing you want to take.

This American Life #617

Ira Glass: This question became known as the Fermi Paradox, which goes like this, if it’s so likely…

Thu, 14 Sep 2017 14:02:09 +0900

Ira Glass: This question became known as the Fermi Paradox, which goes like this, if it’s so likely intelligent life exists elsewhere, where is it? Why hasn’t anybody shown up? And of course the simple answer to that would be, well, nobody else exists.

Me (almost out loud on the train): No, the simple answer is space is goddamn huge.

Me listening to This American Life Ep.617

thingsorganizedneatly: fuzzynecromancer: There is no unskilled...

Thu, 14 Sep 2017 13:43:09 +0900

thingsorganizedneatly:

fuzzynecromancer:

There is no unskilled labor, only undervalued skills.

Take pride in your work. Very satisfying.

Photo

Mon, 19 Dec 2016 14:08:37 +0900

veryintp: yesss

Mon, 19 Dec 2016 13:34:36 +0900

veryintp:

yesss