Weezy's Fun Zone

Save 50% at McDonald's

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 01:42:00 +0000

Want to save 50% at McDonald's?

Then check out this deal: Save 50% at McDonald's

or go to this link:

https://share.livingsocial.com/deals/190802?ref=conf-jp&rpi=38783784

But you have to hurry, this deal will expire soon.

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 20:32:00 +0000

Superman was feeling bored after a long day of crime fighting and wanted to go out and party, so he called Batman to ask if he wanted to go to a club and pick up some girls.

Batman said Robin was ill and he had to look after him.

A little disappointed, Superman called Spiderman to see if he fancied a few beers. Spiderman told him he had a date with Catwoman.

As a last resort, Superman flew over to Wonderwoman's apartment to see if she was free. As he landed on her balcony, he saw Wonderwoman naked on the bed with her legs open. Superman thought to himself: "I'm faster than a speeding bullet.

I could be in there, have sex, and be out again before she knew what was happening". So Superman did his Super Thing in a split-second and flew off happily.
Meanwhile on the bed, Wonderwoman said: "Did you hear something? "

No" said the InvisibleMan, "but my ass hurts like hell.. !!

Who Needs the Stork?

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 22:25:00 +0000

Daddy, how was I born?

A little boy goes to his father and asks, "Daddy, how was I born?"

The father answers,
Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!
Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other. There, your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
>
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You've Got Male!!!

pintrest

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 19:30:00 +0000

I appreciate the guest post, Lindsay Valdez

I visited get.wildblue.com/ and finally decided that it was time for us to get satellite internet. We live so far out that hard wired internet isn’t an option for us. Since we have gotten it, I learned about this great new website from my friends that I have been staying in touch with through e-mail. The website is called Pintrest.com. It is basically a virtual bulletin board. You can create a themed board and your friends ( or anyone) can follow you. You can also follow other people’s boards. It is really easy to pin things from the internet onto your pin board. I have created a couple of different categories on mine. I made one called “my future home”. I pin things that I see on the internet that I am interested in possibly incorporating in a home that I have one day. It’s a great way to keep things together rather than having to pull things out of a magazine and paste them into a notebook.

Death of an ICON

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 04:03:00 +0000

> Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment
> community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection
> and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
>
> Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities
> turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry
> Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and
> Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
>
> Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described the Doughboy as
> a man who never knew how much he was kneaded Doughboy rose quickly in
> show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not
> considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked
> schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he was still a crusty
> old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.
>
> Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough
> and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by
> his elderly father, Pop Tart.
>
> The funeral was held at 350 for about 20 minutes.
>
> If this made you smile even for a brief second, please rise to the
> occasion and take the time to pass it on and share that smile with
> someone else who may be having a crumby day and kneads it.

The Ice Cream Store

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 06:16:00 +0000

Contributed by Milford Woods

We opened up our ice cream store about three years ago in downtown Abilene and business has been totally great so far, especially in summer! Obviously in wintertime there’s nothing good about ice creams so we’ve even been talking about getting together some sort of hot chocolate bar that could compensate for the lack of business. It’s tough maintaining the store in the summer with all the people in and out and the door constantly being open really lets out the air. We went to www.SHOPelectricityRATESTEXAS.com and that’s helped keep the rates down but we’re even talking about installing a revolving door to make it easier to heat and cool the place! There are so many things you learn about business when you open one for yourself that you don’t know otherwise and it’s the kind of stuff you can’t really get from books.

Happily Ever After

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 05:50:00 +0000

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be right back.'

'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife.

'I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I' m going to have a beer.'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar...you know...they have frozen glasses...'

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'

You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

'But my sweet honey... At the bar.... You know...there's swearing, dirty words and all that...'

'You want dirty words, dickhead? Drink your fucking beer in your goddamn frozen mug and eat your mother fucking snacks, because you are married now, and you aren't fucking going anywhere! Got it, asshole?'

And, they lived happily ever after.

Computer infected with a virus

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 05:51:00 +0000

I haven't been keeping up to date with my blogs because I'm trying to fight of a computer virus. I think I might have isolated it but I won't know for sure until I completely remove it and reboot my computer. I'm scanning it right now, and I hope this will solve the problem.

Apparently I didn't have one of the patches installed on my computer and I think that's what made it vulnerable to the virus.

I'll keep you updated as I try to fix it.

She gives Casual Friday a whole new meaning

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 05:23:00 +0000

Traffic Camera

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 17:31:00 +0000

A man was driving when a traffic camera flashed. He thought his picture was taken for exceeding the speed limit, even though he knew he was not speeding.

Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed.

He thought this was quite funny, so he slowed down even further as he drove past the area, but the traffic camera flashed yet again.

He tried a fourth time with the same result.

The fifth time he was laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past at a snail's pace.

Two weeks later, he got five traffic fine letters in the mail for driving without a seat belt.

Thriller Wedding Video in honor of the late Michael Jackson

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 06:04:00 +0000

Here's a funny little wedding video in honor of the late King of Pop, Michael Jackson.

Disney's Desperate Housewives

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 19:05:00 +0000

A Nice Day at the Beach

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 17:35:00 +0000

A man was sunbathing naked at the beach.

For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his penis.

A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."

He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly it would lift itself."

Babies Know...

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 04:04:00 +0000

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Still Together After 50 Years of Marriage...

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 17:24:00 +0000

A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the wife says, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together." "I know," the old man said. "We were probably sitting here naked as a jaybird fifty years ago." "Well," Granny snickered. "Let's relive some old times." Where upon, the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know,
honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago." "I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal."

Guts or Balls...

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 04:45:00 +0000

Guts or Balls...

There is a medical distinction. We've all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definitions are listed below:

GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the boys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: ''Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?''

BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say: ''You're next, fatty.''

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome, since both ultimately result in death.

Summer Grilling Tip

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Thu, 28 May 2009 05:42:00 +0000

As every Southerner knows, come spring it will be time to get ready for that all-important cooking technique of the south --- outdoor grilling!

I have just found out there are several stores (not just in the South) where you can get a FREE Bar-B-Q grill! You can get a free BBQ grill from any of the following stores:

A&P
Albertsons
Costco
Dan's
Food Lion
Fry's
Home Depot
Big Lots
Brookshire's
Lowes
Publix
Safeway
Sam's Club
Target
Vons
Trader Joe's

Wal-Mart

Winn-Dixie

I especially like the higher rack -- which can be used for keeping things warm!

Just make sure to get a metal one... the plastic ones don't do so well.

Ya'll enjoy now!

A Little Request...

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sun, 24 May 2009 22:10:00 +0000

A Little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00.

When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the
President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a
$5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which
read:

Dear God:

Thank you very much for sending the money.
However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington D.C.
and those assholes took $95.00 in taxes.

George and God

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sat, 23 May 2009 18:10:00 +0000

An 80-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his tests come back with
normal results. The doctor says, 'George, everything looks great. How are
you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?'

George replies, 'God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so
he's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the
bathroom, poof! The light goes on. When I'm done, poof! the light goes
off.' 'Wow, that's incredible,' the doctor says.

A little later in the day, the doctor calls George's wife. 'Ethel,' he says,
'George is doing fine! But I had to call you because I'm in awe of his
relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and
poof! the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done, poof!
the light goes off?'

'Oh my God!' Ethel exclaims. 'He's peeing in the fridge again!'

Just Couldn't hold it anymore...

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Tue, 19 May 2009 17:04:00 +0000

I took this one myself, at the San Diego Zoo.

Look close, or you'll miss it.

(...the bear's pissing)

Nun Joke

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Tue, 19 May 2009 04:30:00 +0000

Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, 'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.'

'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so tired of Chardonnay.'

Baby playing with balloon

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Sat, 16 May 2009 18:16:00 +0000

Is this baby laughing or crying because his parents keep kicking him in the face with a balloon? Either way it's funny, so enjoy...

Daddy Ate My Fingers

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Fri, 15 May 2009 17:03:00 +0000

This will make you smile!

This one is for everyone who...
a) has kids
b) had kids
c) was a kid
d) knows a kid
e) is going to have kids.
I guess that means all of us!!

DADDY'S GONNA EAT YOUR FINGERS

I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said,'Daddy, look at this' , and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said,
'Daddy's gonna eat your fingers,'
pretending to eat them.

I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face.

I said, 'What's wrong, honey?'

She replied,
'What happened to my booger?'

Laughing Babies always make me laugh too

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Thu, 14 May 2009 20:15:00 +0000

Blog Remodeling

noreply@blogger.com (Weezy) — Thu, 14 May 2009 06:13:00 +0000

I've almost got it. I'm still not sure about the colors though. I like the Yellow and Purple, but I think it's too much of the same colors.

I'll have to sleep on it.