Using Humor

If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Your Grandmother

DanBrantley — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 19:26:53 +0000

Hello? Hello? What's wrong with this phone?

Georgian granny disconnects Armenian internet

Beware copper-scavenging septuagenarians

A Georgian granny faces a possible three years in jail after a copper-scavenging expedition ended in Armenia’s disconnection from the internet.

While hoping to pick up some valuable booty in the village of Ksani on 28 March, the 75-year-old damaged fibre-optic cables owned by the Georgian Railway Telecom company, which serve Armenia, Azerbaijan and eastern Georgia.

Cue an evening of net-free Armenia, as providers ArmenTel, FiberNet Communication and GNC-Alfa were brought down for several hours until normal service resumed after midnight.

Given her advanced years, the septuagenarian internet-killer has been released “pending the end of the investigation and subsequent trial”, the BBC notes. ®

From The Register.

Filleting Nemo

DanBrantley — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 21:49:57 +0000

I know she's not Nemo

I recently signed up for Netflix.

As I was surveying the vast assortment of movies available to me for instant streaming…

I searched for Finding Nemo and sure enough I found it (Netflix has everything) But it was only available on DVD. Ever resourceful, Netflix offered me some alternatives…

Ponyo

“This Japanese anime feature from famed filmmaker Hayao Miyazaki follows the adventures of a 5-year-old boy, Sosuke, and his burgeoning friendship with Ponyo, a goldfish princess who desperately wants to become human.”

At least it’s about a fish… sort of.

Stuart Little 3 – Call of the Wild

Stuart Little 3 - Call of the Wild

With school out for the summer, the Littles are vacationing in a cabin by the lake, and Stuart is so excited he could burst! But when Snowbell the cat is captured by a mean-spirited creature known simply as the Beast, it’s up to Stuart and a skunk named Reeko to rescue him and a few other friends.

A mouse, hmmm, Netflix is reaching here. But it is a kids’ movie.

And it’s here that Netflix goes off on a tangent…

100 Saltwater Fishing Mistakes

The next two movies:

100 Saltwater Fishing Mistakes & How to Avoid Them

Sometimes, doing things correctly is only a matter of knowing what not to do. And when it comes to saltwater fishing, learning from your mistakes isn’t always the safest method.

and

Offshore Fishing: Deep Dwellers

Offshore Fishing

You can easily become a pro at offshore fishing — or at least look like a pro — with help from this 40-minute instructional release that offers plenty of insider tips, innovative methods and tricky techniques to dig up grouper, snapper and triggerfish.

Does anyone else find it a little disconcerting that two films on fishing would be offered as substitutes for a children’s cartoon about fish?

Maybe I’m just being too sensitive.

Maybe clownfish are good eatin’

Umm umm umm

Dogs Can Sniff Out Bowel Cancer

DanBrantley — Tue, 01 Feb 2011 16:24:39 +0000

"Don't be alarmed, I'm a dogter"

And all this time we just thought they were looking for love.

From the BBC.

The World is Full of Mad Skills

DanBrantley — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 16:29:38 +0000

Easy to pick-up Hard to hold onto

From Gizmodo

15 Funniest Writers of All Time

DanBrantley — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 15:01:02 +0000

A Funny Writer Too!

This just in from Jasmine Hall: Over at OnlineClasses.org she has finished an article that sets out to do the impossible, identify the fifteen funniest writers of all time. Although the list does not include me, it could spark some discussion.You can find it here.

Oh! And in case we don’t see each other before next month, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Jolly Kwanzaa, Happy Channukah, Feliz Navidad, or (insert your sentiment here) and May 2011 be filled with goodness, kindness and mercy for you and yours!