Does this scenario sound familiar?

You’ve been blogging for a few years now, and you feel stuck. You’re not quite sure where to turn for advice, since all the advice you find contradicts each other anyhow.

You aren’t having fun anymore. You want to quit. There are people in your circles who seem to have the “magic answer” and you don’t get what they have that you don’t.

It’s okay. This is an easy one to fix — and all you have to do is to change your mind, change your vocabulary. You aren’t a blogger; you’re an entrepreneur.

What’s the difference? A LOT.

Bloggers are writers. The term blog comes from two words pushed together: web log. This is essentially a running first-person narrative or a daily journal. That’s what blogging is supposed to be, and what writers want it to continue to be. Because writers (and bloggers) are narcissistic and egotistic. This isn’t a slam; this is the truth. Who else but an egotist would take a daily self-portrait and put it on instagram and link it to facebook, twitter, and pinterest?

You see my point.

I know — you’re not like that. You have a filter, and you are providing valuable content that comes straight from the heart and all you want to do is to help other people just like you!

The thing is, though, that you have to be a bit of an egotist to make success happen. You have to decide that YES. MY CHEESECAKE RECIPE IS THE BEST THAT EXISTS SO I’M GOING TO WRITE ABOUT IT EVEN THOUGH THERE ARE ALREADY A BAZILLION AND ONE CHEESECAKE RECIPES ON THE INTERNET.

So being an egotist, in this case, is actually a good thing. And since you’re already blogging, you’ve probably already got this important step covered. Good.

The other is to think of your site as a business, the way an entrepreneur would. If you call yourself a blogger, and think of yourself as a blogger, than you are essentially limiting your growth. Your blog, your business, can only work if YOU are actively writing. The only way you get visitors to your site is if YOU write and then YOU promote and then YOU do it all over again.

and that’s exhausting.

An entrepreneur, on the other hand, builds a site that is a destination. This site is well-designed and all of the top notch articles are easy to find. This site has LOTS to choose from, and readers can easily get lost in the archives for hours. This site is bookmarked, and shared, and pinned, and people you don’t even know recommend this site to their friends. And those friends recommend it to their friends. Again. and Again.

Even if you haven’t actually written anything new for weeks. Or months.

And this site starts to build momentum, and your ads are beginning to make money, with or without you.

That’s the difference. A blogger works for himself and needs to check in to work pretty much every day or the blog dies. An entrepreneur works really (really) hard for a year or so then lets momentum take over so he/she can move on to something else.

and isn’t that pretty much The American Dream? To build a business that creates passive income so you can do the things you really want to do: spend time with your family, figure out how to grow snap peas in the middle of winter, and take the time to blow dry your hair?

It’s not too late. If you’ve been blogging for a few years as a blogger you’ve got a LOT OF MATERIAL already on your site. Look at it with fresh, entrepreneurial eyes. Find the best of the best and highlight those articles in your sidebar. Make sure everything is linked to each other so readers can discover just how much there is to learn and know about you. Let them get lost in your archives. Make them want even more so they bookmark your site and pin it and tell their friends all about it.

you can do this.

this post was part of my The Business of Blogging series.

need help getting organized so you have more time in your day for the fun stuff? The Totally Together Planner is a great resource for busy families!

The post You Are a Blogger Entrepreneur appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

Probably a lot like you, I began reading magazines in my teens. I eagerly looked forward to Seventeen Magazine each month. I wanted to know what highschool was like. I wanted to know what it was like to have a boyfriend, go off to camp, and what things I needed to do to get into a good college.

When I was engaged, I read Bride and Modern Bride magazine like it was a religion. I needed to make sure to get this type of dress, have these types of favors, and wanted to make sure to keep to my allocated budget. I needed to make sure that I packed my honeymoon bag exactly how the articles told me.

When I was pregnant I read every parenting magazine I could get my hands on. I knew WAY too much about the perils of a medicated birth, was certain that breastfeeding was going to be a glorious experience, and knew that my baby was going to be a bonafide genius because I, too, would start with the Doman flashcards the second my infant could focus.

When I was more interested in working out I got Shape magazine and was certain that I, too, could have Buns of Steel or Ripped Abs if I did what the articles suggest.

and then something happened.

I quit all magazines. (except for Star and US Weekly at the hair dresser…. because who are we kidding? reading gossip is fun!)

I quit them because I hated how I had expectations about what I should be thinking/feeling/doing/acting and how my house should look and how I should entertain and how my kids should behave and how many calories I should eat.

I’m actually a really lazy person. The reason I use my slow cooker is because I don’t LIKE cooking —- that’s why my eyes gloss over when a colleague starts quoting Bon Appetit or Gourmet magazine. I don’t LIKE cleaning or doing housekeeping stuff. That’s why I do the Daily 7 and why I have laid out all the “have-to” stuff in the Totally Together planner.

I do like gardening, but my garden is NEVER going to belong in Sunset Magazine. I love my kids, and am proud of how they are turning out, but they will NEVER be glossed over or airbrushed into any sort of mold.

I have (strong) opinions on things, and so do my kids.

But these magazines sell well. VERY well. We all know they are phony-baloney yet we buy them anyway. We try to emulate the articles on our websites. We gloss over things because we know what sells and what doesn’t. A “perfect” food picture sells better, even if that means the meal was sprayed with extra oil or was taken out of the pot before being fully cooked.

We don’t really want to read about all the things that can go wrong on a camping trip. We’d rather read about the 10 Great Ways To Make Your Camping Trip the Best Ever. (oh yeah I forgot I used to read Camping Life, too!)

So how does this tie into blogging?

Because we are NOT magazines. We are real people who are living a REAL life. We have opinions, we  give advice, and we  provide recipes for food and for DIY projects.  But our readers are turning to us because they have a connection to us. They know that we’re in the trenches with them —- we’re not typing from a Manhattan Mad Men-style office building with a team of copy editors and photographers at our disposal.

we are real.

When you forget you are cut-from-the-same-cloth as your readers is when you become unrelatable, and no longer a fun read.

Everyone knows you can turn to Martha Stewart for perfection. Your readers aren’t looking for perfection —– they are tuning in to read you.

So yes, write your 10 Ways to Make Your Camping Trip the Best Ever blog post. But throw in some personality — don’t write like a magazine editor. Write like a blogger. That’s what your readers want, and the first rule of writing is to give your readers what they want.

This is part of the Business of Blogging series.

Part 1: The Business of Blogging

Part 2: Figuring Out Your Internet Voice

Part 3: Writing for Search Engines Doesn’t Mean Selling Your Soul

Part 4: Is Self-Esteem Tied into Sitemeter?

Part 5: Patience, and Other Blogging Virtues

and other stuff:

10 Best Business-y Books

Creating a (non-cheesy) Vision Board

Working from Home with Small Children in the House

The post Real Life, Not a Magazine appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

This is another installment in my The Business of Blogging Series.

I have been blogging full-time since 2008, and have been hesitant to share my successes “out loud” with very many people because I worry about 1) jinxing it and 2) being show-offy

and I’m not a show-offy person, and I worry a lot about karma and good will and even feng shui.

But I’ve gotten to thinking about why I do what I do and why I started what I started. And honestly, I just like helping people. Specifically other moms.

I wrote the proposal for the Totally Together Journal way back in 2004 (I was pregnant with my second). I wanted a way to help other mothers, and thought I could be of service in some way. It took YEARS to get that book to the market.

In the mean time, I started the slow cooking site, and wrote the corresponding cookbooks. The very best part of my day is waking up to Thank You emails and tweets. I love that I can somehow help other busy families get healthy, satisfying, budget -friendly (and gluten free, to boot!) meals on the table. I am proud of that.

I worry sometimes about being too proud. I worry about being a braggart, and I worry that others will feel that my success isn’t warranted or that somebody handed me something. I worry that someone, somewhere will think that I must “know someone” and that’s how I got on tv or got book deals, or how I get a lot of people to my website.

and so I don’t talk about my achievements.

or yet I haven’t, much.

I spent last Saturday in Los Angeles with Adam. We flew in so I could speak at the Latina Lifestyle Blogging Convention about Ethics and Blogging (they knew I’m Scottish…!).

And I realized, I know an awful lot about blogging. An awful lot. I’ve learned through trial and error and have been very lucky in my blogging and social media endeavors.

And I figured that EVERYBODY who has blogged for as long as I have has achieved similar results, and am finding out (through talking to friends/acquaintances) that this is not the case.

I make over 100k directly from my websites.

and I do this all, from home, in my pajamas, while I care for my children.

And it’s not that hard.

This post is titled PATIENCE. Because I truly believe that ANYONE, ANYWHERE can have this level of success if they map out a business plan and are patient. The money is out there. The opportunities are out there.

Don’t worry about what so-and-so is doing. Don’t compare your site to anyone else’s. Learn how to write for SEO and give your readers what they want.

I want to help —- my hope is that I can somehow help other people/moms create additional streams of income for their family’s budget.

I feel incredibly fortunate to be living the life I am living, and I would like to help. If you have questions about future installments for this series, please let me know in the comments below. I’ve finally gotten the green light from Adam to talk candidly (sort of. LOL) and I would really like to offer any help I can. oxox steph

OH! and I should probably explain the above photo of the grape vine. I planted that vine 4 years ago, and the leaves promptly all fell off. I kept watering and fertilizing it even though it looked like a dead stick. For 4 years. And this spring? Not only are there leaves, there are teensy tiny grape bundles! Patience. It’s a virtue! :-0

This is part of the Business of Blogging series.

Part 1: The Business of Blogging

Part 2: Figuring Out Your Internet Voice

Part 3: Writing for Search Engines Doesn’t Mean Selling Your Soul

Part 4: Is Self-Esteem Tied into Sitemeter?

Part 5: Patience, and Other Blogging Virtues

and other stuff:

10 Best Business-y Books

Creating a (non-cheesy) Vision Board

Working from Home with Small Children in the House

The post Patience, and Other Blogging Virtues appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

I have been trying to lose the same 8 to 10 pounds for 2 years. I’ve had plateaus before, but nothing like this — and I was truly getting frustrated. I tried blaming it on my thyroid (it’s fine), my potassium (it’s fine), lack of Vitamin D (it’s okay, too), and getting old (that’s true, I’m older than I used to be!).

But these last few weeks I’ve gotten through this tough spot, and actually feel better and more motivated about working out and eating properly than I have in a good 6 years.

I am certainly not an expert, and am only going to share what has begun to work (FINALLY!) for me. I got motivated after reading through Sandy’s Fitness Friday posts last month, and decided that once and for all March was going to be the month to finally lose the 8 pound blanket so I can be more comfortable and confident this summer.

There are many different reasons to lose weight, and I know that my 8 to 10 pounds is nothing for those who need to lose more. I find weight loss and working out to be somewhat personal, but really had an AHA! moment when I read what Sandy wrote about needing to be held accountable for my diet and exercise. I have pretty good habits already, but found that I was mindlessly eating throughout the day when I wasn’t even hungry. I’d finish the end of a kid sandwich, or pop a few too many tatertots in my mouth while I was preparing lunch.

Since I write cookbooks, I’d justify my large portions and crazy taste-testing — it’s for work! I’ve got to keep making sure it’s perfect!

But I do believe the largest culprit these last two years has been alcohol. I began having a glass of wine or beer every night. I’d again justify that “I worked hard! I deserve this!” and mindlessly fill my glass or say yes to another drink. And that’s not good for me. It might be okay for you, but for me it means that I am no longer in total control of my snacking and am more likely to down a bag of tortilla chips or talk Adam into a late-night icecream run. And each beer is about 250 calories, each glass of wine is about 125 calories, and each shot of whatever is about 100 calories (and when it’s  mixed with margarita mix? a LOT more!)

gah.

The stuff that was okay for me at age 22 isn’t okay at 36. I remember fondly eating and eating and eating. And then washing it down. And washing it down again. But if I’m going to have MORE “good ol’ days” in the years to come, I needed to stop and take charge of my health.

And I need to be a proper role model to these three girls I’m raising.

Anyway. I’m getting sidetracked. I do that a lot.

So! My non-stop reading of personal development books has led me to read a lot of diet and fitness books. I usually take bits and pieces of what makes sense to me and leave the rest. These are the favorites that I keep returning to:

8 Minutes a Day by Jorge Cruise

Body For Life by Bill Phillips

The Dukan Diet by Pierre Dukan

I do the best when I eat whole foods that are low in sugar and high in protein. I feel the best when my carbs come from vegetables and fruit. I bet you probably do, too.

I wish there was more of a revolutionary secret. There really isn’t. I am intrigued by Dr. Dukan’s protein-only days — they seem to really do a good job of getting you back on track when you have a free-for-all day. I think the Body for Life workout is a very good one, and I feel the strongest and most healthy when I workout that way. I like the food and flax recommendation from 8 Minutes a Day and like the basic exercises and photo descriptions.

I have been tracking (loosely) my eating and working out since January– it’s taken 3 months of me writing it out to realize that if I just stopped eating crap the plateau would finally break. It’s annoying to me that even though I KNOW what to do, I just don’t sometimes.

I’ve been eating a lot of 1 minute muffins, have been drinking tons of water, choosing to fill my plate with lean protein and leafy greens, and have limited my eating between 7 am and 7 pm. That’s about it.

The difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is that the successful people do the things the unsuccessful do not. — Brian Tracy

I’ve found a few quick workout videos on You Tube. I’ve been trying to pick 2 or 3 a day to do, and really like the following:

3 Minute Mini Walk

5 Minute Ab and Obliques

10 Minute Muffin Top and Quick Cardio

10 Minute Tank Top Arms and Shoulders

10 Minute Bikini Abs (planks, no crunches)

10 Minute Tank Top Arms (different than other video; I like to switch them up)

What about you? Have you found that you have needed to increase your protein, or your workouts after a certain age, or after having children? Have you needed to change your mindset about food and exercise?

Why is it that we *know* what the answer is, but continuously talk ourselves out of it?

The post How to Bust Through a Weight Loss Plateau appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

To use as needed.

Repeat, if necessary.

For best results, use as directed.

Today was just a bad day. That’s it, just a bad day.

You are not fat.

You are not ugly.

No, that zit on your chin will not be there forever.

You have not scarred your children for life because you yelled at them.

In fact, you probably built long-lasting character.

Your husband is not going to leave you.

It was just a very bad day.

You are doing fine at work. Don’t worry about what so and so is working on.

Work on what You are working on.

What you are working on is good enough.

It is. I promise.

No one is out to get you.

really.

Yes, you will feel better tomorrow.

No, it doesn’t matter in the big scheme of things if you finished all the ice cream. And the popcorn. And drank that whole 2-liter all by yourself.

No one is taking notes or keeping track but you.

And today is a do-over. It doesn’t count.

No, the ladies in the grocery store weren’t talking about you. No, the library coordinator didn’t take it personally when you said you couldn’t help this year.

Yes, it is QUITE ALRIGHT TO SAY NO.

Yes, I know you feel guilty. Own the guilt.

and now move on.

really! do it! move on!!!

I know. You don’t get enough sleep. You don’t get enough exercise. You don’t get enough fresh air and sunshine. It’s not fair.

I know.

It’s going to be alright.

Today was just a really bad day.

Tomorrow will be better.

The post Read Me When You are Having a Bad Day appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

We’re approaching the end of February. Do you know where your New Year Resolutions are?

I’ve gotten pretty good at making and keeping my resolutions each new year — and while it’s still not super easy for me to stay on track, each and every year I have a bit more resolve to keep on course.

It doesn’t matter that we’re near the end of February — there is still plenty of time to get your new year goals and resolutions back on track. If you’ve fallen off the wagon, here are some tips to climb back in it and buckle up; there’s a long road ahead until the end of the year.

If you haven’t made any new year resolutions or goals for 2013, or don’t like to because you don’t think that’s “your thing” — okay. But you also can’t change for the better in any way unless you make the conscious decision to do so. And regardless of your personal journey or path, I believe we all could do a bit better each year.

This is it.

You’re not going to get today back again, and it’s okay to want tomorrow to be slightly better.

How to make New Year Resolutions that You’ll Keep:

1) Write it down. This is such a simple step, yet the majority of people don’t do it. Yes, there are plenty of people who have stuck to their resolve to lose weight or get out of debt by not writing down their goals, but if you DO write it down you have a greater chance of success. And who are we to fool around with statistics? If it feels hokey, don’t worry about it. You don’t have to share what you’ve written down to anybody — just keep it in a notebook or folded up in your purse.

2) Tell Someone. I know. In suggestion number 1 I said you don’t have to share your written resolution or goal list with anyone and now I’m telling you to tell someone else your personal wishes and dreams. I promise I’m not losing my mind— you still don’t have to share your written out list, but you DO have to share what you’re working on.

Accountability to someone else is a much stronger motivational drive than an intrinsic one. This means that you are more likely to disappoint yourself than you are someone else. That’s just how human nature is. We are also much more forgiving to others than we are to ourselves —- so if you veer off track, having a supportive someone in your corner is just who you’ll need to confide in and who can help you retain confidence.

This is what I did with the slow cooker site, and what Jen did with her cocktail site. We told the Internet — it’s a pretty big group to be held accountable to!

3) Review your resolutions every single day. However you do this is up to you. You can pull out your list of goals, or rewrite them every morning. Some people have excellent results by writing their resolutions out as if they have already happened. For instance, if your goal is to lose those final last ten pounds, you might start your day by thinking about  how thankful you are that you can fit into the dress hanging in the closet. You can go a step further and visualize  yourself wearing it and hear in your head all the complements you’ll get from your friends.

I have a vision board. I make a new one every year, and I keep it in the bathroom. It’s personal, and I have sayings and quotes, and magazine cutouts on it. I only share it with Adam, and even he kind of rolls his eyes a bit at how particular some of my visions (picture cutouts) are. But that’s okay. Because my vision board makes me smile and keeps me focused on what it is I’m working towards —  I look at it quite a few times a day, and somedays it spurs me on to take action on a certain writing assignment or to go do a few pushups. Other days I just zone out. I’ve decided to believe that even on my zone out days my subconscious is working on something.

4) Pretend you’ve already succeeded. Or fake it till you make it. This might seem phony at first, but you’ll get used to it in practice. If your New year’s Resolution was to work out every morning, act like a person who works out every morning. What time does that person wake up? What does she wear? Does she sleep in her workout clothes and works out before getting dressed for the day? What does she eat? Do you need different food in the house?

If your resolution was to write every day on your All American Novel, start acting like a novelist. What does a novelist do? Does she get up before everyone else in the house and write for an hour? Does she have a set of index cards with character names and traits? Does she spend 3 hours a day surfing facebook or pinterest, or does she buckle down and work?

5) Reward yourself. This doesn’t need to be elaborate, nor does it need to be expensive, but you have to find a way to celebrate the tiny steps and milestones along the way. Day to Day life is hard enough as it is — trying to change or adapt is even harder, even if you know it’s for the better.

Human nature is to find the easiest and least resistant path. It’s easier to lay around on the couch than it is to lace up your shoes and go for a walk. So reward yourself. Walk to the grocery store and after making a few laps get yourself a pack of sugarless gum. If you’ve gotten through the entire day without yelling at the kids, take a bath. Paint your toes. Do something just for  you that’s a reward. And there is no harm in using the reward as motivation to keep to your goals — “if I don’t use my credit card but instead pay it off, I can use the extra savings in our vacation fund.”

I’m sure you see what I mean.

You don’t have to be in the first week of January to decide to be a New You. Or a Newer Version of You.

You can do this. I know you can.

and it’s not too late.

It’s never too late to accomplish anything you put your mind to.

xoxoox

The post Making and Keeping New Year’s Resolutions appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

How to Make a Standing Desk out an Ironing Board

For the last week or so, I’ve been using an ironing board as a desk. I wish I was smart enough to have thought of this as a DIY alternative to a standing desk — but I’m not. It just sort of happened.

I’ve wanted a standing desk for a while –  I’ve scoured pinterest and DIY sites for ideas, have looked at websites advertising these type of desks (WAY expensive), and even have sent Adam links to how to make them at home using cheap wood and laminate.

So I put this idea on hold.

But then last week happened, and we each had different work trips to go on, and we had unexpected company, and the ironing board that I set up in the corner of the master bedroom got left up. And the computer armoire where I plug everything in at night (my current work desk is the kitchen table, but we have a computer cabinet where we hide everything at night so the “work day” is over by dinner time) got a bit cluttered so I needed another flat surface for charging the laptop.

And I used the ironing board.

And then left it on the ironing board while I was answering email in the morning, and even used it as a table for the last slow cooker recipe I photographed —- and although it’s not the prettiest thing in the world to keep up in the master bedroom, it might very well might be the most practical thing I’ve ever come up with.

What I like about standing versus sitting:

* I’m burning calories — there are studies that prove that standing exerts more energy than sitting
* I’m naturally stepping or swaying while I work — my pedometer (this is the one that I LOVE, and it’s cheap!) is showing that I’ve added a good 2000-3000 steps to my day with very little effort on my part
* I am now finally ergonomic. Since I’ve never owned a desk chair, my table to chair to floor ratio (don’t even know if that’s the actual terminology, but I’m going to assume you know what I’m talking about…) hasn’t ever been proper. I’m exactly 5 feet, so there are very few chairs that allow my feet to sit flat on the floor the way they are supposed to. And our dining chairs are a bit large in the seat, so my knees are at a funny angle if I lean all the way back, which causes me to perch on the edge of the chair while I write, causing my shoulders to slump. With the ironing  board, it’s adjustable, so I can raise the keyboard to the actual right spot for my eyeline and shoulders/wrists.
* BUT. My wrists aren’t supported, I know. Honestly, I’ve never had supported wrists or elbows, so that’s not an issue for me,  but I can see how it would be for others.
* The other really big benefit is that I’m not spending as much time on the computer. It’s just not as comfortable to stand at an ironing board and read gossip sites, or twitter, or online news as it is to curl up with the laptop on the bed or couch. But that is something I need to work on, personally, anyway. I waste a lot of time on frivolous Internet surfing, and my time could honestly be better spent sticking to my to-do list and goals.

                  (this might actually be the biggest benefit)

So there you go! Super simple (and actually kind of stupid) brilliant idea!

The post Use an Ironing Board to Create a Homemade Standing Desk appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

Darth Vader in Barbie Dream House

Darth Vader in Barbie’s Dream House

Why are we programmed to think that it’s not okay to be different than everybody else? Why do we care so much about fitting in? Why do we worry incessantly about what other people think? Why do we try to impress complete strangers? Why does a critical statement from a casual acquaintance or even from an anonymous Internet person stick with us more than praise from a close friend?

Why do we waste time, energy, sleep, and calories trying to squeeze into an impossible-to-fill mold?

Why is there a mold in the first place?

As very young children we try to bend our personalities and our behaviors to fit into preset stereotypes — you’ve got the rambunctious toddler, the quiet preschooler, the bookworm, the artist, the jock, the social butterfly, the brainiac, the playground politician.

in college it’s the same — there are the partiers, the studiers, the rebels, the drifters, and the nerds.

When you’re pregnant, you begin searching for “like-minded” pregnancy friends. You scour Internet message boards and engage in circular arguments about whether medicated or un-medicated birth is the best. You identify whole-heartedly with a group and that becomes Your Identity.

but then things change. Complications arise. Now you’re scheduled to have a c-section. And your friends, Your Tribe, no longer sees you as a good fit. You’re the one who had a c-section. And you are starting to realize that you really had nothing else in common with this group, this tribe, this close-minded group of like-minded people.

And so after a while you look for a different group of like-minded people. Maybe it’ll be the soccer moms (no, they all wear Ugg boots and you once saw a YouTube video on how Uggs are made). Maybe it’ll be the Vegan Moms (no, they make you feel bad about giving your kids Fruit by the Foot). Maybe it’ll be the Crafty Moms (no, because they spend all their free time at Michael’s and spend more money on brown paper and raffia than you thought possible).

and so you drift some more.

Until one day, you realize that you are Happy. You are Happy with who you are —- you work out here and there, but not enough to be considered a gym rat. You eat pretty healthy, and buy organic fruit for your kids, but also buy Cheese in a Can, so you aren’t  a foodie. You like HGTV but would rather watch others work than sand down the porch, so you aren’t a DIYer. You’re pretty thrifty and somewhat cheap, but loathe cutting coupons, so you could never be an Extreme Couponer.

and then you realize that not only are you Happy, you are The Normal. And categories and molds and trying to be something you are not is what’s Abnormal.

what a relief.

The post It’s Okay To Be Different appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

I’ve been working from home, for myself, for the past 4 years. When I first began working from home, I had a contract for Bay Area Parent magazine and BlogHerads. This meant I had set hours and a set list of tasks I needed to accomplish on a daily basis in order to get paid.

Now I work solely for myself — I run the websites and I write books. I LOVE what I do, but because I don’t really have a “boss” I find that I spend more time procrastinating and fiddling around online or pacing the house thinking about work than I actually do working.

This hasn’t been too much of a problem for me; I’ve never missed a deadline, and so far (knock wood) I feel happy with the ebb and flow of our days, even if there isn’t an actual set schedule.

But I also sometimes feel like a kindergartener doing an adult’s job. And when I’m asked by readers how I go about organizing my work day, I sometimes don’t have a very clear answer.

and that’s not good.

So I’ve decided to pay attention to what I do when I’m on a deadline — because as we all know, deadlines are really the only way to get things done. Here are the tips and tricks I use when I need to ACTUALLY GET THINGS DONE.

(but on the days I don’t need to actually get things done? I procrastinate. It’s human nature, and I’ve found it’s best to just not fight it, but instead embrace it, and move on to the next day. We can’t always be on task 24/7. This is real life, not a how-to book or magazine article.)

1) Print out a 5am to 9pm daily schedule

2) Fill it out —- fill out every slot, if you can. Write in waking the kids up, making breakfast, lunches, getting them out the door, etc. If you have little ones at home with you, schedule in outdoor play time and wear them out so you can then (hopefully) count on nap time so you can get some work done

3) Schedule business calls during nap time.  If this isn’t possible, schedule them during times where you know the littles will be happy and can be occupied with a movie/favorite TV show. Try to let unscheduled calls go to voice mail — your clients will quickly learn that you need them scheduled.

4) When on calls with kids awake, have a full-on snack prepared, sippy cups filled; etc. I usually do microwave popcorn and apple slices, and a juice-box. My kids don’t get juice boxes very often, so they are a treat. I start the TV show right before getting on the call, or press “play” right as I’m dialing the phone

5) Take phone calls out of sight from the kids — in a closed bedroom, or the backyard or the garage. Usually with kids over the age of 2.5 or so, they are safe watching TV and if mom is out of sight, she’s out of mind (of course use your best judgment, etc. etc.; you know your kids best).

6) Always inform whomever you’re on the phone with that you are working from home today with small children and you’ll need to keep the call under 20 minutes (or whatever).

7) If you have to write a report or have quiet “thinking time,” I suggest working when you can be fully off-duty as a parent. If you have childcare help, or the kids are at school, use that time. If not, I suggest using the early morning or late night hours, depending on your own personal biological clock.

for me, I’m much more focused early in the morning. When I’ve got a deadline for a writing assignment, I set an alarm and get up at 4 or 4:30 am. It’s just me and the coffee pot, and I can crank out a good amount of work before Adam’s alarm goes off at 6am. When I wrote for Bay Area Parent, I regularly worked what I called “the split-shift.” I went to bed at 8pm with the kids, then set an alarm and worked from 12-4am; then went back to bed until 7am when the kids got up. It may not be a long-term solution, but it definitely works if you’re in a pinch.

and let’s face it. You’re working from home. You’re in a much better position than many, many working people, and there’s no need to complain. You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do.

Life is good.

8 ) There is no End to the work day. I don’t care how many work-from-home books there are that tout putting away the computer or the phone or the book at 6pm to fully “unplug” and be present with your family. It just doesn’t exist when you work from home and are also in charge of the family. There will always be more to do — and there’s no need to make yourself feel guilty for checking email while you walk through the living room, or stop to answer a call if it rings during Jeopardy. You are home. You are lucky. Don’t make arbitrary rules for yourself that you have no intention of keeping.

That said, don’t be obnoxious. Don’t be the person on her iPhone during the Saturday morning soccer games or text during church. Don’t put the phone next to your dinner plate, or use it in a restaurant. If the kids are talking to you, close the laptop and pay attention. Yes, you’re “always on” but you’re not a neurosurgeon. Get over yourself.

9) Enlist help. One of the cool things about working from home is that I can pop in a load of laundry in between tasks, and go outside and weed during a conference call. I love that I have this flexibility, but there are times when I just can’t do anything more than put out fires online, or over the phone. I expect my kids to do their chores, and I expect that my husband help out, too. We follow the Daily 7 as a family, we have regular Family Meetings, and the kids each have a chore chart. If this isn’t an option for you, then hire help.

Don’t try to do every last thing yourself. Not only is it not healthy for you, you’re not being a good role model for your kids.

I feel incredibly fortunate that I have this opportunity to provide an income for our family while being the full-time caregiver to our children. It’s not something I planned — but I couldn’t be happier.

The post Working From Home With Small Children in the House appeared first on Totally Together Journal.

This easy gluten free granola bar/Rice Krispies treat is our new favorite snack. There’s a perfect marriage between a wholesome granola bar and an ooey gooey Rice Krispies treat — you’ll love them.

The Ingredients.

3 tablespoons butter, melted

1 package mini marshmallows, melted

3 cups gluten free toasted rice cereal (we use the new GF Rice Krispies in the yellow box)

1/4 cup ground flax meal (optional)

2 cups certified gluten free rolled oats

1 cup whole raw almonds

The Directions.

Make exactly how you would traditional Rice Krispies treats — the way the box directs. I used a large pot on the stove, but you can use the microwave, or a crockpot (or a Ninja!) — it’s your choice. Once the butter and marshmallows are melty, stir in the rest of the ingredients until well-incorporated.

Spread into a sprayed-with-cooking-spray 9 x 11 pyrex dish. Press down to firm up the bars (tip: I spray a mini plastic cutting board with cooking spray and press down using that— works better than waxed paper or your fingers).

Cool completely, then cut to size. I store in the refrigerator.

Enjoy!

The post Granola Bar Rice Krispie Treats appeared first on Totally Together Journal.