The Writerly Habit

Moved

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 09:54:08 PDT

This blog has moved to http://www.brandiballard.com.

Hooray for Spring Break!

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 09:32:49 PDT

Photo from http://www.radiotimes.com/shows/boston-legal/

Spring Break is finally here. That means only six weeks left of this insane course load. It's my fault, I signed up for four English classes. I'm taking a couple of classes this summer but they are short and involve either trips around the Southwest or creative writing. Huzzah.

I'm also being published in riverrun, the UCCS arts journal, and Poetry While You Wait (PWYW). PWYW is a project of the Pikes Peak Poet Laureate. The collection of poems are printed in a journal, and on plaques, and are placed anywhere in town where people wait. This, of course, is also in Colorado Springs.

In conjunction with PWYW, our local National Public Radio station KRCC is going to be broadcasting a poem a day from the book. I've already been down to record. There will also be a public reading of the book in early April. I'll keep you posted on the dates, just in case you're in Colorado Springs

So exciting news, I thought this would definitely light a fire under my ass to write more. Nope. Not a word. I haven't worked on anything but homework. I guess that goes back to what I talked about before: going for internal validation and not external. External validation is great, for a minute. Then reality sets back in and all your worries are back. So how do you build internal validation? I'm not sure that I can answer that clearly. I am confident in my work and know it is publishable, yet that doesn't translate into producing work.

I was talking about this with my therapist the other day and she asked me what writing would look like for me if it were a job. I said that I wanted to write for four hours or so a day, to have a dedicated time and a set routine. I then said that I didn't know why I couldn't do that now (for a lesser amount of time of course). She said "because it's not your job yet." Hmmm...that's interesting. It is true, if I were getting paid and writing was my main focus, then I would be more motivated to write. It seems to me though, you have to slog your way through writing while it isn't your job, in order to get to a place where it is. Random House isn't going to show up at my door with a book deal if I haven't published squat. Although I did have a weird dream involving William Shatner last night. Not the Captain Kirk Shatner, more like the Boston Legal Shatner. Anyway...you have to be willing to do the work before it's your job. So what is stopping me/us?

I don't know, the mind is a tricky thing. One problem I have is not giving myself enough credit for the work I am doing. I am carrying a fifteen credit hour semester and still finding time to send out a couple of submissions. That should be great on its own. If you are like me, you have this drive to keep pushing yourself and no matter what, it isn't good enough. You aren't good enough. That's probably a good time to seek professional counseling as I've been doing. It's only been a few weeks, but I am already seeing some progress. It's hard to recognize irrational thought processes. If any of this fits you, maybe read Writing as a Way of Healing: How Telling Our Stories Transforms Our Livesand go from there. I know I've recommended it before but there is a phenomenal chapter on writing the wounded psyche.

Margaret Randall

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 21:04:22 PST

I was fortunate enough to attend a poetry reading at UCCS last night in honor of International Women's Day. The presenting poet was Margaret Randall. Prior to the event, I had never heard of her. Her poetry is very powerful, full of myth and strong images of the desert. She tackles issues like immigration, male right, cultural dominance and rape. I'm not going to go on, you can pick up one of her books if you'd like to read her for yourself. She also has tour information on her website.

Ideas come at the most inopportune time...

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 21:36:15 PST

So I'm sitting in British Literature today and I'm bored. Not that I dislike the literature, I just have issues with the teaching method. I just don't get a lot out of the class. Anyway, I've been trying to come up with ideas for a fantasy story. I love the genre but it seems any time I try to write I can't come up with anything that seems original. I've been so stuck.

In class, as my teacher is going on about some minutia, I have an idea. A flash, an image. Yes! It took me right to my opening scene and my main character. The mind is a funny thing. I've been stumped for an idea for two weeks and then, when I am busy, it comes.

That being said, I still have no idea where the story is going. I might just write the opening and see if the character "speaks to me." I've heard other writers say that. I have never experienced it though. Ah well. Back to work.

The Importance of Letting (Manuscripts) Go

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 00:33:25 PST

This came up in a discussion with a friend of mine. She is unwilling to send her work out for publication. She is protective of it as she feels it is her best work. I understand this view as I used to be the same way. Then I realized something, as your writing improves your older work looks like shit. It's true. You think it's brilliant when you write it so you don't send it out. You either a) want to keep it for yourself thinking it is too special to let go or b) don't want to send it someplace for publication when you could have had it published somewhere bigger/better/whatever. So you keep it. Six months roll by and you read it again. Shock sets in as you realize it isn't as good as you thought. A year later, it is relegated to the island of misfit manuscripts.

I suggest, upon finishing a work you feel is brilliant that you let it go. Yep, send it out for publication. You'll save yourself some regret and might even get published in the process. At very least, you'll get some experience submitting work.

Book Review: When You are Engulfed in Flames by David Sedaris

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 13:11:47 PST

Today's book review was brought you by writer E.M. Samuelson and the letter Q:

There’s always one person in a crowd who would willing admit that they once groped a man in a club and later realized it wasn’t their date; that person is David Sedaris. In When You Are Engulfed in Flames, he mentions things like artificial bottoms, parasites, skeletons, spiders, cigarettes and art, managing to make such topics humorous and engrossing. Sedaris shows insight into the neuroses we’re all prone to using a wry sense of humor and a frankness that is almost uncomfortable at times.

I bought this book because it was recommended by a friend and I had an abundance of Border’s Bucks. I would buy another because David Sedaris writes an interesting, funny book.

Market Analysis

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 13:05:12 PST

So I've recently come across Paperback Writer, a blog by prolific author Sheila Kelly (check the site for a list of books and pseudonyms). In my quest to read the blog from beginning to end, I've run across a post in which Kelly talks about how she reads for market analysis. It struck me as something very obvious...that I never thought about doing before.

I think this would be a good monthly activity. Get the top four or five books from the bestseller list in your genre and analyze them. I'm not saying pick them apart. I've read writing books that tell you to take a novel and deconstruct it. The advice is to summarize the events of each chapter so you can see the plot arc. I did that with The Lark and the Wren (Bardic Voices, Book 1) by Mercedes Lackey and it totally ruined the book for me. The magic of the story was gone.

As writers, we pick up a lot of this information just by reading. And where do you get the best instruction? By reading what sells. I think this will be my experiment next month, given I can squeeze it in between my Brit Lit II and IV reading.

Waiting is Depressing

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 10:33:12 PST

I have this list on my desk of journals I want to submit to. This is something I started with the new year. They are in order of due date and I cross them off as I get them done. To be honest, I don't really even think about them until a week or so before they are due. This helps me not feel overwhelmed.

At the same time, it is annoying to have to wait so long for responses. I have one that I sent off in August of last year. At the moment, I have four submissions floating around. I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but for me it is. It's hard to keep writing when you have no idea how the work you are doing is being received. Or if it even was received.

I guess this goes back to the idea of inward versus outward approval. A teacher of mine once said that if you strive for outward approval, you'll suffer a lot more. You need to develop a thick skin. Be prepared for rejection. Be ok with letting your work go (i.e. submitting it). If you continually strive for outward approval, you'll always be dependent on someone else's opinion of your work. I need to remember that.

On a side note, I am feeling particularly lazy this morning. I have three submissions to prepare for the month (four if I push it) and homework to do. Instead I am thinking about playing some World of Warcraft until my husband gets up. What's that about? I'd love it if I woke up in the morning and couldn't wait to write. Does that actually happen or is it just in the movies?

Are you supporting your fellow authors?

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 12:12:57 PST

The demise of literary journals has been at the forefront of the media for a couple of years now. As a writer, this represents the loss of possible markets for my work. Several journals have closed, others have turned to online only. It seems a lamentable loss but then I ask myself, what am I doing to prevent this?

In all honesty, I do not subscribe to any literary journals. Gasp! I know, it sounds terrible but I know there are many other writers like me. We complain about the loss of print markets but do nothing to stop it. I used to subscribe to One Story but canceled when it came time to renew. In my defense, I am an unemployed college student. Many of us are affected by the economic downturn. At the same time, I have the money to go get a cappuccino or amble down to Village Inn on pie rush Wednesdays. I just need to make a point to subscribe and support my fellow writers.

I am often of the same mind about used books. Often, I will go to a bookstore and browse titles, then go on Amazon to buy used copies. Buying used is economical, I agree, but doesn't count towards that author's sales or make them any money. I wonder how I would feel if it was my book? I'd rather people buy new....although I would be happy just to have them reading my work.

I'm not saying we should start spending a ton of money (most of us don't even have) on books and literary journals. I'm just saying that we should be aware of it and consider buying new or subscribing when we can.

Two Years and One Hundred Posts Later

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 14:36:04 PST

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Followers of the Writerly Habit know that I have struggled with writing for many years. I often say that I have low ass-to-chair ratio. Sounds silly, but it's true. I don't normally have trouble writing, my problem is sitting down to get started. Even now, after two years of whining, I still find myself surfing the web and obsessively checking Facebook and my email. I don't understand why I choose such activities over writing but I do. Maybe it is because of the emotional nature of my work. I mostly write non-fiction and it is very personal. Maybe using these websites is how I brain-drain. It might be good for me to take up fiction too and see if that helps.

I do have to say that I write a good deal more than I did in the past. At present time, I have three works out for publication and a stack of pieces waiting to be sent. I have also recognized my need for deadlines in order to complete work. For me, it takes the form of creative writing classes or workshop groups where I am expect to produce work.

I have also resigned myself to my process. Sometimes I need to surf the web or crochet while I'm working out ideas. I need a certain level of distraction. The push is no longer on daily writing, but regularly producing work. It is a slight shift but an effective one.

Amazon and Macmillan Duke it Out

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Sat, 30 Jan 2010 23:56:46 PST

Shortly after agreeing to offer e-books to Apple for the iPad, Macmillan's books have been pulled from Amazon. Ok ok, that's not why they pulled the books but you have to wonder if there weren't some hurt feelings there. According to the Times, they were pulled because Macmillan wants Amazon to charge more than the $9.99 set price for e-books. Until the dispute is resolved, all Macmillan titles will be unavailable (except through third party sellers).

I can see both sides of the argument here, I really can. Amazon wants to set low e-book prices to encourage buyers to drop $259 on a Kindle Wireless Reading Device (6" Display, Global Wireless, Latest Generation). So the publishers are getting shafted and Amazon gets to sell an expensive piece of equipment. I'm already a little anti-Kindle because of their proprietary DRM formatting and the big brother aspect (wherein they can go in and take away your books without your consent ala the 1984 incident). So why shouldn't Macmillan get a bigger slice of the profits if they are helping sell this device?

On the other hand, as a reader, I wouldn't pay more than $9.99 for an e-book anyhow. I know there are costs involved but there is no printing, warehousing, distributing etc. I'm not going to pay $15 when I can wait for a trade paperback at about the same price. What worries me is that Apple is going to have a different pricing model wherein the publisher sets the price. So, if you get an iPad, you may very well pay more for your e-books. What a bunch of crap. I thought e-books were supposed to revolutionize the market and make books more affordable. Seems to me that corporations are still just as greedy as ever and will charge whatever they like despite lower costs. Ridiculous.

Author J.D. Salinger dies at 91

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 23:11:44 PST

Yesterday J.D. Salinger, author of The Catcher in the Rye, died of natural causes. I won't go into too much detail as I feel the article in the Times covered it nicely. I'd rather take this time to comment on his work. Although I haven't read Nine Stories, I have read The Catcher in the Rye. I'll admit, the book is a bit dated but it has entered a sort of folk-lorish infamy as the book serial killers, bombers and murderers all seem to carry. I know John Hinckley Jr. and Mark David Chapman had it. I've heard the Boston Strangler and Timothy McVeigh did also. I don't know if that's true or not.

I did find the book a rather difficult read. Possibly because of the language used by the main character, Holden Caulfield. He mostly went on tirades about "phonies" and how you couldn't trust adults. The writing style was kind of lax, much like Stephen King (who is an excellent storyteller). Maybe it is just my generation, or the fact that I am a woman and this was a boy's coming of age story, but I just didn't get. The story didn't seem to have a point. If any of you out there have read it, please let me know what you think.

I do have to say that I read it because of its connection to criminals. It didn't make me want to shoot anyone or blow anything up, so much for that theory.

Although the book was never made into a movie, it did make its way into 1997's Conspiracy Theory. Supposedly, Salinger didn't want it made into a film. I wonder, in the event of his death, if his estate will turn it into a screenplay. I hope not. Plus I don't think it would really work, too much time has passed.

In Love with the iPad (100th Post!!)

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:28:55 PST

The iPad tablet was unveiled by Apple this week. At first, I was imagining how cool it would be to finally have an e-book reader that could also access apps like the iPhone. I've never used an e-book reader and usually prefer hardcover, but as a student the idea of not lugging around a bag full of books that I had to overpay for is tantalizing. In my joy over not breaking my back, I totally overlooked the implications for authors. Tom Evans, writing for Publishing Talk, makes a great case for buying the iPad over the Kindle. After all, you get to access pages (that's Word for Macs for you PCs). The tablet also features a large size touch keyboard, meaning that you could use it to write. You can't beat the 10 hour battery life or the fact that you can plug it into a keyboard and continue writing while it charges (plus I like to keep all of my files in the same place). It's sleek, stylish, lightweight and ultra-portable. Unlike the Neo by Alphasmart which looks like a toilet seat. Mind you, the $499 price tag is a little limiting for me but I truly expected it to debut in the $900 range.

Watch the keynote here.

In other news, happy 100th post! It's been an interesting couple of years and I've made a lot of progress as a writer. I'll be blogging about that in the next few days. Stay tuned.

Why does Taylor Antrim hate Memoir?

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:21:19 PST

In an article for The Daily Beast, Taylor Antrim trashes memoir. He states "Too often, memoir seems to me an excuse to be fragmentary, incomplete, narratively non-rigorous." This seems like an unfair attack to me. He argues that some memoirs, particularly Happy and The Ticking is the Bomb, would be better off written as novels.

Pardon me, but I think the reason a memoir should be written as a memoir is that it is a true account. Mind you, creative non-fiction provides some wiggle room. Yes, you may not remember the exact conversation you had with your psychotherapist in 1963 but if you get the gist of it, who gives a crap? We read memoir because we are interested in other people's lives. We want to identify instead of merely escaping (although good authors can excel in both whether it be CNF or fiction). If memoir was a failed medium that cowers in front of fiction, why is it so damn popular? I think if memoir was just an excuse for lazy writing, it would've been done away with long ago.

Here's a short reply from The Rumpus that is also worth a read. What do you think though, is Antrim right or is this a publicity stunt? Maybe this is a jab back at an industry that criticised him harshly. The reviews of his book The Headmaster Ritual on Amazon.com are positive but also point out some flaws. The New Yorker states that "he does not entirely succeed in illuminating the resonance of all this for his characters’ interior lives." Wait, I'm confused, in his diatribe on memoir he accused memoirists of not developing characters enough. Reed Business Information states "the climax is marred by a chain of events that defies reason." Hmm...

Increase Your Literary Vocabulary

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:22:05 PST

Have you ever run across a poem or other work that addresses an inanimate object? We see this a lot with more flowery poets. Oh moon! Oh stars! Oh freedom! This is addressing a personified thing rhetorically which is also known as an apostrophe. An apostrophe also refers to addressing a person who isn't there. So now when you come across someone reading a poem such as the below sonnet by Alfred Lord Tennyson, you can sound exceedingly brilliant by pointing out the apostrophe. Huzzah!

Oh, Beauty, passing beauty!

I

Oh, Beauty, passing beauty! sweetest Sweet! How canst thou let me waste my youth in sighs? I only ask to sit beside thy feet. Thou knowest I dare not look into thine eyes, Might I but kiss thy hand! I dare not fold My arms about thee--scarcely dare to speak. And nothing seems to me so wild and bold, As with one kiss to touch thy blessed cheek. Methinks if I should kiss thee, no control Within the thrilling brain could keep afloat The subtle spirit. Even while I spoke, The bare word KISS hath made my inner soul To tremble like a lutestring, ere the note Hath melted in the silence that it broke.

Ah Ubik, How You Taunt Me

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 22:23:58 PST

I just finished reading an article about Philip K. Dick and his years in Orange County. If you don't know who Philip K. Dick is, well you've been living under a rock. He was a prolific sci-fi writer, responsible for A Scanner Darkly, Blade Runner (Four-Disc Collector's Edition) and Minority Report (Widescreen Two-Disc Special Edition). Plus many other works. I personally like The Man in the High Castle. My ultimate favorite is Ubik.

I would explain the plot, but it is available on Wikipedia and frankly I'm tired. What I am more interested in is Ubik the film. In 2008, it was announced that Celluloid Dreams would produce Ubik. We're still waiting. There is a mention of it in the article by the L.A. Times but no website listed. A search of IMDB turned up nothing nor did YouTube or Google. What the hell is going on here? The Times lists the film as debuting this year but I can't find any information. Has anyone heard anything?

In an amusing side note, some Philip K. Dick fans actually call themselves Dickheads. That is too funny. If you haven't read any of his work, you definitely should. I'm not even a sci-fi reader and I like his work.

Publishers Torn on Free E-Book Giveways

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 14:04:02 PST

In an article in the New York Times, a publishing battle has been brought to the forefront. Several publishers are offering free e-books as promotional tools to entice Kindle users to buy other titles by the same author. Generally these are older titles used to promote newer ones.

Some publishers are concerned with the $9.99 fixed price Amazon is setting for Kindle books. They feel that this alone will cause users not to want to pay $24.95 for a hardcover. Giving it away for free is even worse. I tend to lean to the other side. If I read a free book by an author I don't know, I am more likely to buy other titles if I like it. $24.95 is a huge gamble on a new author (especially given our current economic climate). A free e-book is low risk. Besides, if you can afford a Kindle, you can probably afford to buy additional titles if you like what you see.

To me, this is reminiscent of the pre-internet video game era. You'd buy a game for $50 with no idea if it was good or not. Turns out, the game is terrible and you can't get a refund so it just sits on your shelf gathering dust. Or you use it as a coaster, same diff. Books are even more difficult to gauge. You can't just get on YouTube and watch a plot walkthrough. Ok, ok, that's enough with the video game analogy but you get my point.

I want to know what you think. Is this a good marketing tool or a shameful act that will cause the print market to collapse?

A Clever Fix to an Umm.... Uncomfortable Title

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 12:46:14 PST

Have you ever been embarrassed to read a book in public because of the title and/or cover art? As someone who has dabbled in erotica, I find this a common problem. Kevin Sampsell, author of A Common Pornography: A Memoir (P.S.), has provided a simple solution to reading his book in public.

Hilarious! Although I might have gone with "A Common Portcullis." It has a nice old world flair. I have a feeling this will help increase his sales just through sure humor value alone. Hmm...I wonder if this will work with some of my other books.

The Wind-up Bird Chronicle Hits the Stage

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 19:54:18 PST

I wish I was in New York City because Haruki Murakami's book The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle: A Novel has been turned into a stage production. The stills in the gallery look amazing, they have that sort of ethereal/metaphysical quality that is seen in Murakami's work. There's also a trailer. It is running until January 30th at the Ohio Theater. Hopefully it does well and travels. I'm skeptical that it will land in Colorado though.

It would be interesting to see some of his other works, like Norwegian Wood or Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World: A Novel (Vintage International) (my personal favorite) hit the stage. If you aren't familiar with Murakami's work, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle: A Novel is a great place to start.

Author Edwidge Danticat to be Interviewed by CNN

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 19:17:40 PST

Author Edwidge Danticat will be interviewed by Christiane Amanpour on CNN this Sunday January 24th. It is scheduled at 2pm EST. They will discuss the situation in Haiti. Danticat is a Haitian native. She is best known for her novel Breath, Eyes, Memory (Oprah's Book Club), which was an Oprah's Book Club book. Here is an print interview with CNN that she did on January 13th.

Readers Slog Their Way Through Slush on Authonomy.com

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 18:46:36 PST

I was reading an article today from the Wall Street Journal about the death of the slush pile. At first, the thought that I could have as low of a .008% chance of being plucked from the slush pile depressed me. But then I read on about a website by HarperCollins called Authonomy. This website allows you to upload a minimum of 10,000 words from your manuscript. Visitors to the site can read, recommend and comment on your work. Those with the highest scores each month will be read by HarperCollins editors.

I have to hand it to them. They've found a way to digitize the slush pile and also use free labor to cut through it. After all, if you can't get people to read it for free, what makes you think someone would pay $14.95 for a printed book? I hope more publishers use this method. I think it's brilliant and can't wait to start reading.

Sadly, I am nowhere near 10,000 words so I won't be uploading my work. I've been planning a memoir but in the meantime I have been busy writing short stories and poetry. Lately I have had a tremendous outpouring of creative energy. Let's hope it lasts. I also have three manuscripts out for review at the moment. Wish me luck.

Book Review: If You Want to Write by Brenda Ueland

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:23:56 PST

As a late Christmas present to myself, I ordered a copy of If You Want to Write by Brenda Ueland. Amazon is nice in that I was able to preview the book. The table of contents seemed promising, so I ordered it. The fact that the "look inside" featured a previous edition of the book should have tipped me off. I received my copy and it was horrible. I'm a very visual person so bad formatting can keep me from reading a book. This one had it all, grammatical errors on the back cover, too large margins, tiny font and the first two pages were missing. That's right folks, NO TABLE OF CONTENTS. I can't help but wonder if this is a self published book, BN Publishing's website turned up little information.

So it took me a couple of days to get off my formatting high horse and give this book a read. I got as far as page six, technically page four in my copy, when I spotted this little gem: "Families are great murderers of the creative impulse, particularly husbands." This seemed a rather sexist and limited comment so I read a little further on to see if she elaborated further, but no other mention was made.

To be fair, the book was written in 1938, twenty five years before The Feminine Mystique. Although the book shows no evidence of being targeted towards women who want to write, perhaps back then only women writers would read a book about writing by a female author. Maybe it's a generational issue but this book is not a timeless classic. It shows its age within the first few pages. I decided that the book was not worth reading and, because I was missing two pages, I was able to return it to Amazon.

There you have it. Now, if you are interested in finding out how to correctly format a self-published book check out the February issue of The Writer. Moira Allen has a great formatting article.

The Top Ten Moments of the Decade

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 22:51:13 PST

Another year ending, this time the close of a decade. The news stations have compiled their top ten lists of the moments that made the decade. The rise of gossip media and Britney shaving her head have made the list. Where are the truly monumental moments, the ones that reached past trash media and truly impacted our lives?

Somehow, Heath Ledger's death holds more weight than President Bush declaring war on Iraq, or the fact that we've learned to speak a new language. Words like Fallujah and Abu Ghraib have infiltrated our everyday conversations. We all know what it means to pull a Columbine (4/99), it's eerie remnants echo through countless campus killings including Virginia Tech, that have plagued this past decade.

We've learned to associate terror with the skin color and culture of a people, easily forgetting the domestic terror that happens in homes across America. Somehow, a father slipping into his daughter's bed at night is less important than imposing our idea of freedom on a country thousands of miles away. Our soldiers laying dead in the sand, their bodies blown apart by i.e.d's, have become the new face of patriotism.

People live in Tent City, along I-25 and other areas in Colorado Springs, driven there by adjustable rate mortgages and unemployment while our city government offers $53 million in incentives to keep the U.S. Olympic Training Center from moving it's headquarters. The poor are left to suffer and die, yet their deaths get less air time than the increase in cosmetic surgeries over the last ten years.

Perhaps, as the decade closes, we should take a look at our media and the ignorance it perpetuates. Realize that this has been a decade of indifference. That we are no longer surprised by deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan or pictures of prisoner abuse. The poor of this country continue to suffer. Children in less affluent areas, and around the world, still get hookworm and other diseases for want of a pair of shoes while celebrities spend over $1,000 on a single pair. We aren't shocked by this, worse yet, many seek to emulate this behavior.

Resolve, as a new decade begins, to open your eyes to these disparities. See your contribution to the media mentality that seeks to dictate importance. Recognize what is truly worth fighting for and what can be done without.

Blocks

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 00:18:51 PST

I started this week with a great writing meeting. Every so often, I meet with friends from last summer's creative nonfiction class. I was pretty happy that we actually talked about writing this time, normally we just socialize. Anyway, we met last week and assigned a prompt (write about a current event), then this week we were to bring work to share. Despite being unwilling to work on it most of the week, I managed to write 2.5 pages. I went to the coffee shop early and wrote before the meeting. While I was there, we talked a lot about blocks. For me, it isn't that I don't think I have anything worthwhile to say or that I don't have any ideas. I have plenty of ideas and have come to accept my viewpoint as valid and worthwhile. When it comes to writing...well I just don't want to.

I know I need to write, but I somehow can't bring myself to sit down and do it. A friend of mine suggested that it might be an environmental problem. That is entirely possible. When I am at home, I am distracted by other things I could (or think I should) be doing instead. My friend recommended going to a coffee shop at a designated time in order to write. She says I need to treat it like a job. It would be interesting to see if my output increases if I get out of the house. I'll try it.

What I'd really like is to be motivated to work from home. The environment is more comfortable and the tea is better (not to mention free). If you are listening, Pikes Perk on North Academy, your green tea is horribly bitter. Any ideas on motivating myself to work at home?

Image from The Wandering Eater

Dreaming about Your Writing

BrandiLBallard@gmail.com (Brandi Ballard) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 06:56:15 PDT

I've been reading Louise DeSalvo's Writing as a Way of Healing for a few weeks now. Last night, I was reading about how authors may dream about their work. The kind of writing DeSalvo is talking about is personal narrative that relates emotion and events.

For me, I have never dreamed about my work. I've never felt that kind of connection. A few weeks ago, I decided I would write a memoir about my first marriage. I hadn't thought about it since then, or so I thought. Last night, after I read the section on writers dreaming, I had a dream about it.

It was strange, I was on a cruise ship and put through an express line for check-in. There at the other end was my ex-husband only it looked nothing like him. The dream him was way better looking. Anyway, we were being offered $100,000 to get married again. We decided to go ahead with it and if we hated each other and had to get a divorce on our return then at least we had the money. Weird.

Anyway, check out DeSalvo's book. It is excellent. She also recommends a book called Writers Dreaming. I haven't read it by it's a penny on Amazon so what could it hurt.