Oh, James, why won’t anyone believe you?

Yeah, I’m as surprised as you are that you’re here, because this comic — the one you accidentally found right here — has been publishing on the web since April 2009 and in print since July 2009, and yet, no one bothered to check to see if that title was already in usage prior to, I dunno, launching a new, high-profile comic with the intention to possibly sell it to Hollywood?

Obviously, Guggenheim and his team meant no harm, and are probably quite clueless to this flub. But I’ve had friends and readers already confused by the announcement of the other “Utopian” (I only heard about it because of their links to articles about the announcement), and that’s why there’s this thing called “trademark,” to protect the dilution of a brand’s distinctiveness in the marketplace.

So, while it’s very obvious the two Utopians are completely unrelated, it may cause some consternation when it comes to marketing our respective titles in the same marketplace. If you came here by happy accident, I hope you take a look around. This is a comic strip that has grown and developed in unexpected ways over the last 15 months and you’ll see that as you browse the 100 or so pages. And if you’re a regular reader, well, you know I love you and appreciate your continued support.

And if you’re Marc Guggenheim? Hi.

And … we’re back! I’d like to be able to report about all the fun times had during the strip’s hiatus while I was on the East Coast, but, um, let’s be honest: I’m actually posting this page on June 21, so I have no idea how the trip went. I don’t even know if I went! I feel like I’m trapped in some weird time travel paradox.

You should probably check my blog or Twitter to make sure I’m actually still alive.

Welcome to the FINAL CHAPTER.

Believe it or not, kids, we’ve come to the end of Part 010, “Answers.” It felt like forever, didn’t it? No? Well, to me it did.

I’m heading off to the Jersey shore (insert reality TV joke here) for a week, so guess what? Yep, it’s hiatus time. But it’s the last hiatus between chapters, because Part 011, “Hero,” is the final arc in this now year-plus story. So be back here on Wednesday, July 21 for the beginning of the end. Bring popcorn.

Too bad I couldn’t make this a meeting in the ladies room. AMIRIGHT?

Anyway. You people still out there? According to my web and RSS stats, you sure are (and many from Germany — hi there!), but I don’t hear from ya much anymore. You don’t call, you don’t write, you just take what I give you and never give back. Sounds like my former marriage. OH!

For some reason, I felt like I was writing the script for a bad after-school special today. “Oh no, not only is little Johnny taking drugs, but it’s the COACH that’s selling them!” But this is all just part of the bigger picture. I know there were no knife fights or bad urban slang today, but I promise, there will be plenty of drawings of stucco houses next week. Because I love you that much.

When I was in high school, I spent a lot of time underneath the football stadium bleachers — not like that, you pervs — usually during gym class to avoid any real physical activity, often with pals such as Frank Beaton, smoking cigarettes and discussing Nirvana and the Pixies. I don’t think I ever actually sat on the proper side of the seats.

And for my own sanity, I hope I never have to draw them again.

But surprisingly, I like drawing football players. They’re like superheroes. Go figure.

On a side note, a big thanks to Sarah Kuhn, author of One Con Glory, for the shout-out in her recent interview with Bildungsroman. I drew an illustration for the book, which you should buy like right now because it is seriously good.

That last line is probably groan-inducing, but I kinda like the cheese-worthiness of it, so I’m keeping it.

You know how they — whoever “they” are — suggest to “write what you know?” With this strip, I’ve decided to go the opposite way, and write about gangs and drugs and football. Oh, and dream states, spirituality and demonology. Because, you know, why not?

For those of you who have stuck with us from the beginning, thank you. And for those who’ve complained about the lack of supporting cast and/or the diminishing emo-ness of The Utopian, well, hang tight. This race to the finish line is going to be a wild ride, and everyone’s coming along.

See, he’s called T-Rex because he’s big, and he, um, is king of the dinosaurs? I dunno, whatever.

James & T-Rex’s exchange was supposed to wrap up with this page, but I got so wrapped up with the banter that it’s spilling over to the next page. In other news, as of this writing (which is actually May 26 — yes, I am that far ahead now!), I have now officially finished plotting the duration of this strip. Yep, that’s right, not only is there an end in sight, but a specific page number, too. But I’m not telling YOU when. All I can say is that from here on out, things are going to move very quickly.

For the curious, there will be one more “floppy” print issue, No. 4, coming in the fall, and then in the winter (in time for Christmas?), I’ll be releasing the ENTIRE Utopian saga in one trade paperback. It will feature not only all the bonus material from all four print issues, but also some new surprises, including full annotations for every page of the story. Trust me, the volume will be worth it just for the annotations alone — so many secrets behind the strip will be revealed.

So save up your pennies now, it’ll be a must-buy!

So I have to confess: I know how this story ends. I mean the whole story, not just this seemingly never-ending chapter. But I’m having a little bit of a writer’s block with the next few steps toward that ending. See, I wrote the ending a year ago, and then about a month or so back, I started working backward from there, loosely plotting out how we get to the finish line. That’s good. What’s not is that I haven’t quite sussed out the details of getting from here to there.

The good news is that I’m posting this strip that you just read on May 24, so I’m actually way ahead of the game, which hopefully should give me some breathing room to overcome this block. Because otherwise, we’re gonna have to do it “choose your own adventure” style.

This is getting posted a week ahead of schedule, which means that I’m writing to you FROM THE PAST. That means if I happen to get hit by a bus in the next week, I’m actually posting this FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE.

Let’s hope that doesn’t–er, didn’t?–happen.