It’s been fodder for many a heated debate among men for centuries.

What skills should every man know?

A vast amount of ink and e-ink has been spilled on the subject. But why?

Part of being a man is being competent and effective in the world. To do that, you’ve got to have skills. A man wants to know (or at least feel like he knows) that no matter what situation he’s placed in, he’ll be able to handle himself — to act rather than be acted upon. Hence our incessant drive to figure out what skills we’ll need to know in order to demonstrate confidence and capability in all our manly roles.

For primitive man, this needed skill-set was clear and relatively narrow, largely revolving around the jobs of fighting and hunting.

The breadth of skills needed today, however, is much wider. The modern man must be both a warrior and a diplomat, a woodsman and a scholar. We need both hard skills and soft skills; skills we use every day and skills we keep in the back pocket, just in case.

We’ve covered many of these skills over the years on the Art of Manliness, and so figured it was time to add our contribution to the collective cultural enterprise of figuring out which skills a well-rounded, grown man should have. Below you’ll find the AoM list of 100 skills every man should know.

1. Tie a Necktie

Even in our casual culture where hoodies are appropriate attire for billionaire CEOs, every man should know how to tie a tie. Funerals, weddings, and job interviews are just a few occasions when a sharp necktie is appropriate, and you’ll be attending plenty of those during your adult life. You don’t want to be the 30-something who needs to ask his mom to tie his tie for him.

2. Build a Campfire

There’s a primordial link between men and fire. While it’s no longer necessary for our survival, man’s connection to fire still exists. It’s both exhilarating and calming, dangerous and assuring. There’s nothing like sitting around a crackling fire under a starry sky while poking the embers with a stick and meditating on the big questions in life. Just for those reasons alone a man should know how to build a fire. But it’s also vital to know so you can build a fire while camping in order to cook a solid meal for yourself and those with you. Using Duraflame logs is a cardinal sin that will automatically send you to outer darkness, where there is wailing and gnashing of teeth.

3. Hang a Picture

Being asked to hang a picture on the wall may be perhaps the world’s most common “honey-do.” While not necessarily an exact science, knowing some basics about wall hangings, and where to place prints on the wall, will ensure that your home has charm that will knock the socks off visiting dates and parents, and greatly please your main squeeze.

4. Shine Your Shoes

A pair of shoes with a mirror shine can add the finishing touch to a sharp get-up. And besides keeping your shoes in tip-top shape, the act of shoe shining is a satisfying, manly ritual that calms the mind. The repetitive strokes of the shine brush coupled with the warm smell of shoe shine polish is enough to put you into a meditative state. To go the extra mile, build your own shoe shine box.

5. Treat a Snakebite

Since the very dawn of man, snakes have been one of our greatest enemies. They slither and sneak and hiss, and just are no good for anyone. Should you encounter a venomous variety of snake (learn how to identify them here!), it’s in your best interest to know how to treat being bitten. Hint: most of the old wives’ tales are just that, so don’t go trying to suck the poison out.

6. Read a Book

1) Open book. 2) Read words. 3) Close book. 4) Move on to next book. Reading a book seems like a pretty straightforward task, doesn’t it? And in some cases, it is. If you’re reading purely for entertainment or leisure, it certainly can be that easy. There’s another kind of reading, though, in which we at least attempt to glean something of value from the book in our hands (whether in paper or tablet form). In such cases, there are certain techniques you must master to be able to dive deeper into the text and suck out all the marrow.

7. Survive a Bear Attack

While bear attacks are rare, a man should always be prepared. Whether you’re camping for a weekend, or simply out for a morning hike, you never know when you’ll need this information. Believe it or not, just weeks after I compiled the research for our AoM guide on the topic, I encountered not one, but two black bears on a popular trail in Rocky Mountain National Park. It does happen. I was surprisingly calm with this useful knowledge at hand, and I felt confident I could have taken down those black bears should necessity have called. Alas, it didn’t, and I mourned the loss of the new rug I was looking forward to for my living room.

8. Wet Shave

Electric shaving is fast and easy and the multi-bladed razors can give you a pretty close shave. But nothing beats the manly ritual of shaving with a safety razor or straight razor. Traditional wet shaving adds an element of skill back into what has become a mindless grooming activity. It makes you mindful and present. Plus, old school wet shaving is much cheaper than using the fancy multi-blade cartridges. A blade will only set you back about 25 cents. Feel manly and save money? It’s a win-win proposition.

9. Parallel Park

In the suburbs you enjoy endless drive-in parking in the giant lots in front of big box stores. Make a trip downtown and it’s a different story. Yeah, there are parking garages, but most of the parking is on the street next to the curb (not to mention it’s also the cheapest), meaning you need to know how to parallel park. You don’t want to be the guy who holds up traffic because he’s constantly backing up and moving forward after multiple failed attempts.

10. Paddle a Canoe

Paddling lazily across the water is one of man’s great joys. Whether with your gal on a date, or just enjoying nature on a solo outing, there are few better recreational activities. While paddling might seem as natural as riding a bike, it takes a certain level of skill to deftly captain a canoe. Don’t be that guy/couple who can’t make headway because they paddle inefficiently or even tip over and end up in the water.

11. Negotiate/Haggle

Depending on where you are in the world, negotiation is either a part of everyday life or an uncomfortable practice that’s consciously avoided whenever possible. But here’s a truth that many of us, especially those of us living in the Western world, don’t always consider: whether or not you realize it, many of your commercial transactions can be negotiated. From hotel rooms, to rental cars, to complex business deals, knowing how to haggle can save you (or your business) a boatload of money. It’s awkward, sure, but with practice, you’ll get more confident and capable in the deft art of negotiating.

12. Fix a Leaky Faucet

Drip. Drip. Drip. It can drive a man crazy in the middle of the night when he’s trying to sleep. It can also cost you money in the long run, in both water and handyman bills. While plumbing is not always a DIY project, fixing a leaky faucet is generally a pretty simple task. With a couple tools, a trip to your local hardware store, and a guide, you’ll restore your sanity in no time.

13. Treat a Burn

Burns can happen just about any time and any place. Spilled coffee, mischievous campfire, over-heated car engine — our world is rife with potential for harm through heat. Should you find yourself with a first or even second-degree burn, you can almost always treat it yourself. A couple tips: You want to slowly cool the affected area with cool, not icy, water. Make sure to clean the burn and apply an antibiotic ointment, and don’t pop the blisters, as that increases the infection risk.

14. Tell a Joke

In the age of dank memes and viral videos, the art of the well-told joke is a dying skill. Knowing how to make people laugh without resorting to showing a guy kicked in the nuts on your smartphone will set you apart from the pack. Plus, when you’re out in the middle of the woods and cell phone reception is non-existent, knowing how to tell a well-timed joke will be some of the only entertainment you have.

15. Predict the Weather

If you regularly watch your local news for the weather forecast, or check your smartphone for it, you know how often they are flat out wrong. While forecasting has come a long ways, some of the most accurate tools are the oldest. Barometers, for instance, can tell you what the weather will be like in the next 24-48 hours as well as any professional forecast. Beyond scientific instruments, even old proverbs — like “Red sky at night, sailors delight; red skies in morning, sailors take warning” — have many kernels of truth contained within. Soon enough your own predictions will be beating that of your local weatherman.

16. Do a Deadlift Properly

The deadlift trains the muscles that allow you to perform one of the most basic of human movements — lifting stuff off the ground. Besides the squat, no other exercise provides as much practicality as the deadlift. And it just feels plain awesome to hoist 400+ lbs off the ground with a barbell.

17. Recite a Poem From Memory

There’s something about reciting a poem from memory that’s different from just reading it over and over again. The words become a part of you. They may not be your original words, but when you say them from memory, it feels like they’re coming from the heart. Reciting a poem from memory can provide you and others inspiration and consolation in trying times. Plus, knowing how to effortlessly sprinkle in a few lines from a poem in a conversation can make you appear a bit like the Most Interesting Man in the World.

18. Grill With Charcoal

While the propane barbecue grill has only been around since the 1950s, men have been grilling with charcoal for thousands of years. Rather than just pushing a button for your fire, charcoal requires a little more skill and care, and according to most folks, makes for a better-tasting product as well. Bone up on lighting a charcoal grill.

19. Perform CPR

Some emergency situations are so urgent that calling 911 and waiting for paramedics will be too late. One of those is in the case of heart attack or other scenario where someone becomes unresponsive and is having trouble breathing. Believe it or not, one-quarter of Americans say they’ve been in such a situation. Don’t be caught unprepared. While you should know conventional CPR, you should also be aware of the hands-only method which can be used on teenagers and adults.

20. Throw a Spiral

Whether you’re playing catch with your kiddos on a Saturday or playing all-time QB at this year’s Thanksgiving Turkey Bowl, you’ll need to know how to throw a nice, tight football spiral.

21. Sew a Button

You’re hastily getting ready for work, and as you button up your nice oxford shirt, one pops off. You’ve known it was loose, and that this reckoning would come. What is a man to do? Sew it back on, of course! While sewing may seem like a skill purely in the ladies’ realm, knowing this simple clothing fix can come in mighty handy when you’re in a pinch.

22. Split Firewood

Yes, most of us have central heating to keep our houses warm during the winter, but there’s nothing like the warm glow of a fireplace fire during the winter months to keep you toasty. But to get the big logs to fit into your fireplace, you’ll need to make them smaller by splitting them. And let’s be honest, splitting wood isn’t so much about lowering your heating bill, but rather about the satisfaction a man gets when his maul goes cleanly through a log and splits it in one stroke. It makes for great exercise, too.

23. Find Potable Water

When you’re lost in the woods, your most immediate needs are food, shelter, and water — the last of which is the most pressing. One method of finding safe drinking water is to collect rainwater. If you’re going to use lake or river water, it should be purified, which can be done with filtration, iodine tablets, and other methods.

24. Change a Flat Tire

There’s no sound more disheartening to a driver than the “flop flop” of a flat tire. Instead of cursing about it, look at a flat tire as a chance to display your manly sufficiency by changing it yourself. Knowing how to change a flat will save your own butt when you’re out on some lonely stretch of highway, and will come in handy when helping a damsel in distress or a hapless traveler on the side of the road.

25. Break Down a Door

You’re in a burning house and you need to escape, but the door is on fire. Or your loved ones are in a burning house and you’re locked out. You can’t stand there fiddling with the lock — you’ve got to break it down! Or perhaps a loved one is stricken with a medical emergency and is locked inside a room or in their house. What to do? Be a man, dammit! Break down that door! You know you’ve always wanted to.

26. Take the Perfect Photo

The advent of the smartphone means that most everyone is carrying a high-quality HD camera in their pocket at all times. Unfortunately, this fact alone doesn’t mean you’re taking good pictures with it. Don’t let life’s memorable moments be hampered by a poor photo. Play around with your camera, get to know the various settings, and understand some basics about what makes a great photo.

27. Sharpen a Knife

From pocket knives to kitchen knives to survival knives, blades are one of man’s most important tools. But a dull blade renders your knives useless and dangerous. Know how to sharpen a blade, do it regularly, and you’ll always be ready to slice off a piece of apple, or even slay a killer raccoon.

28. Change a Diaper

Even if you don’t have plans of being a dad, you’ll end up changing a poop-filled diaper at some point in your life, perhaps for a nephew or godson. Many men are intimidated by the task, but there’s really not much to it, and there are a few tricks that can make it a quick and tidy affair.

29. Give a Speech

We all are faced with speaking opportunities throughout our lives. Whether it’s running for student council president, making a presentation at work, having your voice heard at a city council meeting, or offering a eulogy, a knack for public speaking makes you a more persuasive and powerful man.

30. Navigate With Map and Compass

Sure, we’ve got phones with Google Maps that can give us turn-by-turn directions. But what happens when you don’t have the phone because you’re in the middle of the wilderness and you can’t get a signal? How are you going to get back to your fancy ski lodge now? With a map and compass of course. Out of all the skills I’ve learned over the years, this has been one of the most empowering. It just feels awesome knowing that by simply getting my bearings with a compass and looking at a topographic map I can traverse miles and get to where I need to be.

31. Unclog a Toilet

Some clogs will take care of themselves with a few flushes, but sometimes you drop a monster so big that it takes a bit of work and know-how to get the toilet unclogged. For added skill points, know how to unclog a toilet without a plunger. That’ll save you when you clog the toilet at your girlfriend’s parents’ house and you don’t want to shamefully ask for a plunger.

32. Buy a Suit

You’ll likely buy two or three suits in your lifetime. If you buy the right one, it will be years, maybe even a decade, before you’ll have to buy another, so know what to look for in a quality suit — how it should fit, how it should be constructed, the details you should care about, and the alterations that can make it nigh near perfect. Not only will knowing how to buy a suit help you, you’ll also be able to help friends and family navigate the haberdashery so they don’t waste money on a crappy-looking outfit.

33. Swim the Front Crawl

Swimming is not only a fun recreational activity, but a survival skill as well. Knowing how to swim the front crawl could not only win you a gold medal (even if it’s just in your backyard olympics), but could very well save your life someday too. It’s the fastest of the primary swimming strokes, and is among the first that any swimmer learns in the pool. If you don’t yet know it, take it upon yourself to find an instructor, and dive in! Knowing how to tread water is also important, and can be turned into a legit workout to boot.

34. Shake Hands

A firm handshake is an important part of a good first impression. A full-grip handshake, given with just the right pressure, and accompanied with your looking in the person’s eyes, conveys warmth and confidence. Conversely, a limp, dead-fish shake or a crushing death grip will get your meeting off on the decidedly wrong foot. Or hand, I guess.

35. Treat Frostbite

It only takes 30 minutes to get frostbite when it’s 0 degrees outside with a 15mph wind. Decrease the temp or up the wind speed, and that number quickly goes to 10 and even 5 minutes. If you experience loss of color or feeling at your extremities (frostbite hits your body at its furthest points from your core), you’re possibly experiencing an onset of frostbite. The first step is to rewarm the affected areas with warm, not hot, water.

36. Iron Your Clothes

You’ve got a pair of trousers and a custom shirt, but the whole get-up looks terrible because you couldn’t take the time or didn’t have the know-how to iron your clothes. Many men don’t know how to iron their pants or their shirt because dear old mom did it for them and once they got married, the Mrs. took over the chore. But every man is going to have a period in his life when he’s on his own and he’ll have to do his own ironing. It’s not that hard and takes just five minutes, but it can make all the difference between an outfit looking put-together or sloppy.

37. Practice Situational Awareness

Every day there’s a chance we’ll encounter a threat that can put our safety in danger — an active shooter, a deranged co-worker, or even an inattentive driver. Often times we don’t notice the threat until it’s too late because we’re so engrossed in our own headspace. In the tactical world, it’s often said that the best way to win a fight is to avoid a fight in the first place. To do that, you need to develop your situational awareness. Situational awareness isn’t just knowing what’s going on around you, it also means having a plan for what to do when you notice something go awry.

38. Do a Proper Pull-Up

The pull-up is one of the best upper-body exercises out there, but most people don’t even know how to do one properly. Grab the bar with an overhand grip and start from a dead hang. Pull yourself up until your chin clears the bar. Lower yourself down in a controlled manner and repeat. None of that kipping garbage.

39. Build a Shelter

In any kind of survival scenario, proper shelter will provide much-needed protection from the elements. With some basic materials (wood, reflective blankets, fire), and just a little bit of know-how, you can ensure that you’ll not only survive a night (or more), but even sleep warmly.

40. Grow Your Own Food

Growing your own food is not only a pleasurable, recreational activity, but goes towards building your self-reliance and antifragility as well. Today’s foodstuffs are loaded with unpronounceable chemicals and additives, and whole, natural foods remain expensive. Why not grow your own fruits and vegetables for a fraction of the cost, and twice the flavor? Need even more reasons to start a garden? Here are seven.

41. Cook Eggs

Eggs are a breakfast staple if for no other reason than their sheer versatility. They can be enjoyed on sandwiches, in scrambles, as omelets, or eaten right out of the shell (raw or cooked!). If you can master a few ways to cook eggs, you’ll be a breakfast aficionado who will wow your significant other, or your kids, depending on your station in life. Your primary varieties — scrambled, fried, poached, and hard-boiled — are all easily learned in just a few minutes.

42. Make Small Talk

When you spot an acquaintance in a store, do you hope they don’t see you? Does the idea of walking into a party where you only know one person fill you with dread? Do you keep trying to summon up the courage to talk to the cute girl who makes your lattes at the local coffee shop, but whenever you get up to the counter, all you can muster is your order? All of us can relate in some way or another to the conundrum of small talk. It’s sometimes uncomfortable, but can be truly life-changing; you never know if the person you’re standing across from could end up being a good friend, a coworker, or even a wife.

43. Identify Poisonous & Edible Plants

A stroll in the woods is nearly always an enjoyable endeavor; what’s not so enjoyable is discovering a red, itchy rash the next day. Each year, millions of Americans come in contact with poison ivy, poison oak, or poison sumac. These may be the most common irritants, but are far from the only ones. Besides being able to identify plants that can harm you, it’s also beneficial to know the plants that could save your life in a dire situation. Knowing your foliage — both good and bad — is truly a skill every man should have!

44. Do a Front Dive

Much like swimming, knowing how to properly dive is not only just a fun skill to have, but could help save your life. In a scenario where you need to skedaddle into the water quickly, such as a sinking boat, the dive is the way to go. It propels you with a jump start of momentum rather than having to get going from the standstill of treading water.

45. Shuffle Cards

It’s always surprising when you’re playing a card game, rotating the shuffling of course, and one of the players has to sheepishly pass the deck because they don’t know this simple, manly skill. If you’re playing cards — be it poker, euchre, gin rummy — you should be able to do your part and shuffle the deck, and do it with some flair too!

46. Hunt

In the book, The Hunting Hypothesis, author Robert Ardrey highlights the research and theories that suggest that what made humans human was the ability to hunt. Since our hunter-gatherer times, hunting has always fallen on men. Ardrey suggests that hunting is how men have displayed nurturing and caring behavior since time immemorial. Besides allowing you to connect with our primal history, knowing how to hunt will allow you to provide for yourself and your family even if you don’t have access to a grocery store. In fact, you could provide a full year of meat for your family during a single hunting season. Kiss your meat expenses goodbye.

47. Properly Pour Beer

Does it really matter how you pour your beer? Isn’t beer, beer, no matter how it’s poured? Well, that may be the case if you’re drinking low-quality beer (I won’t name names), but when drinking a fine brew, it can mean a world of difference. When properly poured, the beer produces aromas and flavors that can only be present under the right conditions, and with the agitation of a proper pour.

48. Perform the Fireman’s Carry

Even if you have the physical strength to save someone’s life by carrying them to safety, do you know the right way to do it? Every man should know how to perform what is called the “fireman’s carry.” It’s an effective way to distribute someone’s weight, allowing you to haul them over long distances with minimal strain. Next time you have to carry an injured victim from a burning building, down a hiking trail, or off the battlefield, employ the fireman’s carry.

49. Open a Bottle Without an Opener

You’ve arrived at the campsite with your friends and some cold beer in the cooler, only to realize you left the bottle opener at home. Lucky for you, that’s no problem — you’re a master of improvisation. We put together 9 MacGyver-esque tricks to open a bottle whenever you find yourself without an opener. You’ll never be left high and dry again.

50. Cast a Fishing Line

Fishing has been a skill that fathers have passed down to sons since time immemorial. It’s not only a fun and relaxing way to spend a morning or afternoon, but hearkens back to our caveman and caveson days, when fishing was more than just a pastime, but a survival skill. And one of the first steps to learning fishing? Knowing how to cast a line.

51. Speak a Foreign Language

Traveling the world can be quite an adventure, but you can never truly immerse yourself in the places you visit unless you speak the people’s native tongue. Speaking a second (or third) language allows you to connect with locals and experience more of what lies below the surface available only to the passing tourist. Speaking another language may also help you in your business, sharpen your brain, and even aid you in a tactical situation; James Bond was fluent in 4 different languages, and handy in 4 others, after all.

52. Drive in Snow

Even if you grew up doing it, driving in the snow is a bit of a harrowing task. The sun is glaring off the pure-white landscape, black ice threatens at every curve and underpass, and you aren’t quite sure you have the skills to handle a wipe out. When driving in the winter, just remember that slow and steady wins the race (although you really shouldn’t be racing on a snowy road!).

53. Perform the Heimlich Maneuver

Even though you’ve probably heard of the Heimlich maneuver countless times, and seen it dramatized just as many, a lot of folks really don’t know exactly what to do beyond putting their arms around the person and squeezing somehow. If the victim can still cough or make noise, encourage them to keep coughing — don’t intervene yet. But once someone can’t breathe, cough, or speak, it’s time to act: current protocols call for alternating five sharp back blows with five abdominal thrusts. Should you need to perform those thrusts, you ought to be able to do them effectively.

54. Ask a Woman on a Date

Manliness is too often ranked by how many random women a dude can bed. But one of the things that separates man from the beasts is the ability and desire to focus his romantic energies on one woman at a time. Being a lover and romancer is something that makes us human, rather than just another mammal on the Discovery Channel. And there is no better tool in the romantic man’s arsenal than the date. The date’s structure allows a man to show off his ability to woo a lady. Unfortunately, few men have been taking on the challenge of being artful pursuers these days, as our dating abilities have become infected with the plague of hanging out. Don’t be that man. Gird up your loins, and ask a woman out!

55. Always Know North

A man always knows his direction, be it philosophically in life or physically on the road. He can find North without a digital aid. A compass is the easiest and surest way to do this, of course, but there are other methods as well, including using an analog watch, sticks and shadows, the constellations in the night sky, and the moss growing on trees and rocks. But each of these methods of finding North involve a good deal of know-how and nuance, so it’s definitely a skill you’ll need to master before you really need it.

56. Fell a Tree

So you know how to split wood, but how do you get those logs in the first place? You could buy them, but that’s lame. No, you need to go out to the woods and fell your own tree. It’s a dangerous task if you don’t know what you’re doing, but boy is it a great feeling to hear a tree fall on the forest floor with an echoing “THUMP!” End your day felling trees with a large plate of pancakes smothered with Vermont maple syrup. Bonus points: fell a tree with a knife.

57. Hitch/Back Up a Trailer

So you’ve decided to borrow a boat for a weekend of fishing or maybe you’re going to rent an Airstream for that dream road trip across America. Awesome. Do you know how to hitch the boat trailer and the Airstream to your vehicle? Once you get it hitched to your car, do you know how to back-up a trailer without destroying the property around you? Knowing how to hitch and back-up a trailer will open a whole world of outdoor recreation opportunities for you, so get out there and start learning.

58. Play Poker

If you’ve never played poker before, going to a casino for a bachelor party or a friend’s house for a casual poker night can be an intimidating affair. The rules of the game itself are hard enough to master (Does my two pair beat your three of a kind? Answer: no it does not.), but you also have to know betting rules and game etiquette. Thankfully, with just a few strategies up your sleeve, it won’t take long to not feel like a newb anymore.

59. Write in Cursive

In our age of texts, tweets, and emails, one thing that can set you apart from the crowd is sending a nice, handwritten letter every now and then. To set yourself apart from the pack even more, write your letter in cursive. It just looks classy and adds a bit of personality to your notes. And don’t just save it for letters. The continuous strokes of cursive make journaling a more meditative experience.

60. Throw a Knockout Punch

Avoid a fight if you can, but if there’s no other option, end it as quickly as possible by throwing a knockout blow. Open your opponent up with high jabs and a few fakes; once he drops his guard, send a powerful straight punch right to his kisser. Lights out.

61. Make Pancakes From Scratch

While eggs are a breakfast staple because of their ease and versatility, pancakes are a fan favorite because of their simply delightful nature. They’re fluffy, warm, and covered in any number of tasty toppings: butter, syrup, peanut butter, fruit, whipped cream. It doesn’t get much better than a tall stack of pancakes to start a lazy weekend with your family. Knowing how to make pancakes from scratch will make you a Saturday morning hero.

62. Skipper a Boat

One of man’s great powers is that he is an amphibious creature, able to both traverse the land and navigate the water. Not only should you be able to move through water by your own manpower, you should be able to skim its surface by knowing how to pilot a boat — and not just those that involve a motor and steering wheel. From tying nautical knots, keeping the boat balanced, and trimming the sails, every man should know how to skipper traditional sea craft.

63. Dress for the Occasion

Black-tie. Semi-formal. Business casual. Do you find yourself asking what the heck these terms mean anytime you see them on an event invitation? With just a little bit of study and practice, you’ll come to automatically know the differences — for instance, that business casual means a sports coat and khakis (or even jeans, depending on where you live). You never want to be the guy who wore slacks and a button-up to a semi-formal event.

64. Shoot a Bow and Arrow

From our survival guru Creek Stewart: “I am a big fan of the bow and arrow for a variety of reasons, and I personally think that anyone who has an interest in primitive survival skills or modern urban survival should seriously consider purchasing a good bow and arrow and become proficient in using it.” The weapon’s portability, versatility, and affordability (you can even craft your own) make it a top choice for hunters and survivalists.

65. Drive Stick Shift

Driving an automatic vehicle is so pedestrian. With a stick shift, you actually feel like you’re part of your car. The synchronicity of man and machine makes driving a manual transmission car not just a chore, but a joy. Plus, owning a manual makes your vehicle pretty much theft-proof — it’s such a lost skill that most would-be thieves wouldn’t know how to drive away with your car even if they managed to break in.

66. Do a Proper Push-Up

When you don’t have access to a gym, there’s always push-ups. They work your chest, shoulders, triceps, and biceps. Even if you do have access to a gym, make push-ups part of your routine throughout the day. An 85-year-old attorney I knew credited his random push-up workouts in his office as the key to his longevity and health.

67. Pick a Lock

Kicking down a door is a great skill to have, but sometimes you need to be a bit more discreet when opening a door that’s locked. Who wants to replace their door every time they lock themselves out of their house? That’s where lock-picking comes in. Besides making you handy, and saving you money on replacement doors or calling a locksmith, this skill also makes you feel a bit like Jason Bourne.

68. Mix Two Classic Cocktails

If you’re out on the town with your main squeeze, you can look to spend anywhere from $8 to $20 on a nice cocktail. That’s a lot of scratch for a beverage, especially when you can be making ones at home that taste just as good (if not better!) for a fraction of the cost. And rather than being a one-trick pony, knowing how to make at least two different drinks will make you feel like a real mixologist, and impress your guests too. Learn how to make classics like the martini and the Manhattan; bonus points if you can mix up some interesting drinks for your teetotaling friends too.

69. Field Dress Game

Whether you hunt regularly to stock your freezer with meat or you’re stuck in the wild and need to eat a squirrel to survive, you’ll need to know how to dress your kill so that it’s ready for butchering and eating. If you don’t know anything about dressing game, start with a small animal like a squirrel or a rabbit. It’s less messy, and the same general principles that you use with those animals apply to larger game like deer.

70. Play One Song on the Guitar

The guitar has a way of showing up at parties and campfires, and it often gets passed around so people who know how to play can strum out some tunes while everyone sings along. Instead of passing it on to the next dude, why not hold on to it and bust out a song of your own? Getting a group of people to sing a song while you provide the accompaniment is an easy way to command a room like a man. Also, chicks dig a dude who can play the guitar.

71. Use a Chainsaw Safely

The aftermath of a heavy thunderstorm or ice storm often leaves broken and fallen branches in your yard. To clean them up, you’ll need to cut them with a chainsaw. Learn how to operate one safely so you don’t accidentally cut off one of your limbs in the process.

72. Do a Squat Properly

You don’t need a bunch of leg machines to get a good lower-body workout; just a barbell with some plates will do. Squats are one of the best exercises you can do for overall strength. Not only do they work your quads and hamstrings, but also your hips, butt, back, and core. There are two variations of the barbell squat: high bar (pictured above) and low bar. Learn them both. They emphasize different muscles and can be used in different strength training routines.

73. Cook a Steak

The beauty of a well-cooked steak is in its simplicity. No fancy seasonings, just a bit of salt and pepper and fire. Know how to cook a steak and you can eat like a king the rest of your life.

74. Entertain Yourself (Without a Smartphone)

You see it everywhere: people on their smartphones while standing in line, while getting gas, when conversation lulls at dinner . . . anytime people aren’t stimulated for 10 seconds or longer, out comes the phone. Not only is it rude in many instances, it means you’re tethered to your little electronic device for entertainment. Learn how to pass the time without your phone — play board games, do push-ups during commercial breaks, make a paper airplane, work out a philosophical problem in your head, or turn a boring conversation into a stimulating one by actually listening intently, showing some curiosity, and asking good questions. Heck, learn to enjoy the old pastime of people watching. Being able to entertain yourself is surely one of the 3 characteristics of an educated man.

75. Change Your Car’s Oil

Knowing how to change your own oil can save you time and money. Instead of driving 10 minutes to the Kwik Lube, waiting another 30 minutes before your car can get worked on, waiting another 30 minutes while the oil change actually takes place, and then driving another 10 minutes back home, just get the job done in half an hour by doing it in your garage. Besides saving you time and money, changing your own oil just feels self-sufficient and darn manly.

76. Whistle With Your Fingers

With a loud, commanding whistle you can call your dog, your kids, a taxi, or the peanuts guy at the ballpark. Using your fingers makes it easy to get that ear-piercing whistle sound whenever you want it. This is a small skill, but a weirdly satisfying one to master.

77. Shovel Snow

Snow shoveling is often a back-breaking, tiresome process. You could be moving hundreds of cubic feet of the fluffy (or not-so-fluffy) white stuff. It’s generally not a particularly fun activity, although it is an excellent workout and a fine opportunity to fill your lungs with crisp, clean air. While those in colder environs are practically born knowing this skill, others may need a couple quick pointers to ensure the best and most efficient job possible.

78. Carve a Turkey

Primitive hunters often dressed and butchered their game in the field, in order to divide up the carcass among the hunting party and make it easier for carrying back home. Maybe the echoes of this task are why carving the Thanksgiving turkey typically falls upon the man in a household in our modern day. When you get called up to carve the bird, you want to be ready with skill and know-how that will allow you to get as much meat as possible from the turkey without mutilating it. Take pride in the artfully sliced platter of juicy turkey you assemble for your guests.

79. Tie a Bowline

The bowline is a loop knot that is incredibly secure. Consequently, it’s often used in rescue situations in which you need to pull someone out of a ditch or ravine. You can also use it to tie off the boat to your dock. Once you master tying the bowline with both hands, earn bonus man points by learning how to tie it with one hand.

80. Ride a Horse

Sure, in this motorized world, knowing how to ride a horse may be the most “archaic” skill on this list. But I’ll be darned if it’s not also one of the most satisfying. Many a great man from history used horseback riding as a way to decompress — Thomas Jefferson, Teddy Roosevelt, Jack London. It simply feels wonderful to mount up and head towards the horizon. Also, if American cinema is correct about the apocalypse, horses will once again be the primary mode of transportation one day. So don’t scoff — know how to saddle up!

81. Give a Good Massage

While the date is the ultimate tool in the gentleman’s romantic arsenal, you need other skills as well to impress your gal (including many on this list!). Among them, knowing how to give a good massage — and just for her sake rather than in hopes of sex — is an important one. She’ll feel loved and cared for, which is the ultimate way to affair-proof your relationship.

82. Get a Car Unstuck

There are a lot of things your car can get stuck in: mud, snow, even a ditch. While every situation is different, there are some principles you can follow that may help you become unstuck without needing to call for a tow. Knowing them could save you thousands of dollars in towing fees, and may be a necessity in rural areas that don’t have cell phone reception.

83. Break a Rack of Pool Balls

So you’ve watched The Hustler — one of the best movies of all-time — and you’re inspired to head down to your local pool hall for some billiards action. You grab a cue, line it up to break the rack, and instead of hitting it perfectly like you did in your daydreams, you shank the cue ball for the ultimate whiff, and the rack is still intact. Breaking the rack is your billiards first impression — it has the potential to intimidate foes and impress buddies. Don’t blow it.

84. Make a Logical Argument

In the age of the internet, it seems that logical arguments have gone the way of the dodo. Debates, whether in online comment sections or on TV, are not much more than name-calling matches in which whoever shouts the loudest wins. Debates and arguments should be civil affairs, though, that avoid logical fallacies and employ sound reasoning. Learning this skill builds your powers of persuasion, puts you a leg up in our modern world, and allows you to stand out as a real gentleman. For it’s not the volume of your voice that signifies a masterful debater and skilled rhetorician, but the content of your words.

85. Cook Bacon

Nothing tastes better on a cold winter morning than some pork bacon (turkey bacon is not bacon) fried in a cast iron skillet. You don’t want bacon too soft or too crispy. Getting that just-right texture takes patience and skill (and maybe even ditching that skillet for the oven). Add man points for frying bacon shirtless and braving those hot kisses of grease. Add even more man points for making your own bacon. 

86. Write a Letter

At AoM we’re great champions of the lost art of letter writing. Emails, texting, and the wide variety of other digital mediums available to us in the modern age are convenient and efficient, but they can’t hold a candle to the warm, tangible, classy nature of handwritten correspondence. Letters are the next best thing to showing up personally at someone’s door. And their permanence is unrivaled; long after we’ve forgotten the password to our hotmail account, our shoebox of letters will remain. Write to a pen pal; write regular thank you notes; write letters of “emotional insurance” to your children; and be sure to write all 7 of these letters before you turn 70.

87. Shoot a Gun

A gun can provide food, protection, and even an afternoon of fun. It’s an extremely useful tool, but a dangerous one. You need to know how to safely operate different types of firearms (pistols, shotguns, rifles) without unintentionally injuring those around you or yourself. Even if you don’t have plans on becoming a “Gun Guy,” at least have a basic understanding of how firearms work in case you ever come across one in the wild, or need to use one to save your life.

88. Make a Toast

You don’t want to be the Best Man who’s remembered for giving an utterly cringe-worthy toast at your buddy’s wedding. And besides weddings, you’ll likely have several opportunities to provide toasts throughout your life. With a bit of forethought and practice in front of the mirror, your toasts can sound natural, inspiring, and memorable (in a good way).

89. Jump Start a Car

It happens to everyone. Somehow the dome light in your car got left on while you were in the office and now your car’s battery is dead. Instead of calling AAA to get the car going for you, jump start it yourself. It will save you time and money. Plus it’s a skill that will make you incredibly useful to others. You’d be surprised by how many people don’t know how to jump start a car.

90. Know How to Dance

Nothing impresses a woman more than a man who knows how to dance. And by dance I mean ballroom dancing where you lead a gal across the dance floor. None of that “nae nae” nonsense. Basic ballroom dancing isn’t that hard. Start off with the box step, learn the waltz and foxtrot, and you’ll be good for most weddings and cruises.

91. Brew the Perfect Cup of Coffee

Sure, you can plop some Folgers into a filter and hit the “Brew” button on your coffee machine. But that’s like going to Walmart to buy a suit. You just aren’t getting the best product. Grinding your beans, boiling your water, and brewing them in a French press truly creates the perfect cup of coffee, and also adds an element of craftsmanship to your morning routine. You can try roasting your own beans, as well as some other tactics to level up your morning coffee game.

92. Tie a Tourniquet

For a long time, tying tourniquets was a frowned-upon method for controlling major bleeding — something to be employed as an absolute last resort. That’s because during the wars of the 20th century, when it often took a long time for a wounded soldier to get medical attention, the tourniquet would end up cutting off the blood supply for too long, necessitating amputations. But the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan showed that tourniquets, coupled with speedy medical attention, could be absolute life savers, and thus their use has been revived in combat and civilian medicine alike. You still need to know when and how to properly tie a tourniquet though, so study up and then do ample hands-on practice.

93. Know Two Cool Uncle Tricks

An essential part of being an awesome uncle is having a repertoire of tricks and jokes that will amaze your nieces and nephews, and crack them up. From juggling and pulling coins from ears, to levitating and “bouncing” dinner rolls on the floor, every uncle should have at least two giggle-inducing tricks up his sleeve.

94. Fillet a Fish

What makes fishing even more satisfying is being able to fillet and cook your catch for a real water-to-table experience. Throw it in a skillet with some garlic, lemon, and butter, fry it over the campfire you’ve built, and enjoy a wild dinner under the stars.

95. Calm a Crying Baby

Whether your baby has colic or just intermittent fussiness, their cries can really do a number on your equilibrium. Since babies can’t do anything for themselves, their cries are designed by nature to get your attention, burrowing into your brain and refusing to let go until you alleviate their distress. Their wails elicit a real physiological response — you start to sweat, your heart rate goes up, and your body releases cortisol (the stress hormone). So it’s no surprise that knowing how to calm a crying baby is one of the most important new-dad tools you can have in your arsenal!

96. Ride a Motorcycle

Motorcycles are one of the pinnacles of manliness. They’re up there with Islay single malt, grass-fed sirloin, and Creed’s Green Irish Tweed cologne. Why? Because unlike automobiles, they offer a visceral experience: one that requires skill, mental engagement, and risk management. On a motorcycle, you can’t sip coffee, fiddle with your phone, or daydream the minutes away. Your senses are on red alert, and your life depends on two tiny patches of rubber connecting you to the road. Riding a motorcycle is an experience every man should have in his life.

97. Hammer a Nail Correctly

To the unskilled, hammering just means pounding the hell out of something until you get the job done. Sure, you could do that, but you’ll end up with crummy results and a tired arm to boot. A wise handyman knows how to use a hammer safely, effectively, and efficiently.

98. Cook a Signature Dish

Cooking cultivates a variety of manly qualities, from self-reliance to chivalry. So while you need not become a 5-star chef, at a certain point every man needs to move on from the Easy Mac, ramen, and frozen pizza he subsisted on in college. Knowing your way around the kitchen can be intimidating at first, but even with just a single pot you can make some tasty meals that will impress friends, family, and ladies alike. Once you’ve mastered some basics, you can work on creating a signature dish that you perfect and whip up on special occasions.

99. Make Fire Without Matches

It’s easy to start a fire when you have a pack of matches at your disposal. But could you forge a flame if you didn’t have that crutch? Or would you starve and freeze? There are many ways to make fire sans matches, from using a battery or magnifying glass to going totally primal and using only a board and a stick. Learn as many methods as you can, so that if you ever find yourself alone on a desert island, you can declare to your volleyball friend: “I have made fire!”

100. Tell a Story

Every man needs to be able to tell a great story. It might be for a presentation you give at work. Or for a paper you need to write. Maybe you’re just hanging out with your buddies swapping stories. Or you’re tucking your kids into bed, and a nighttime tale is demanded. No matter the scenario, it takes a certain amount of skill to tell a story in a way that captivates an audience.

The most important part of storytelling, though, is simply having the experiences that make for good tales. What stories of your life will you have to tell your grandkids? Start making those memories now by learning as many of these skills as you can. The more know-how you gain, the more places you can go, things you can do, and people you can converse with; in short, the more skills you master, the more adventures you can have!

With our archives now 4,000+ articles deep, we’ve decided to republish a classic piece each Sunday to help our newer readers discover some of the best, evergreen gems from the past. This article was originally published in September 2019.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

YouTube Update Video. While I used to regularly make videos for YouTube, I stopped ten years ago because I don’t like making videos. But I thought I’d check in on that platform to announce the new website redesign and catch subscribers up on what else AoM has been doing this past decade. Plus, I know people parasocially want to know what I look like these days. Answer: A lot grayer.

Also be sure to watch this other video we made in conjunction with the redesign that captures the ethos of McKay Inc. 

The Only Plane in the Sky: An Oral History of 9/11 by Garrett Graff. This week marks 25 years since the September 11 attacks. I had author Garrett Graff on the podcast to talk about When the Sea Came Alive, his oral history of D-Day, and was impressed with his storytelling method. He gathers hundreds of firsthand accounts and weaves them into a single hour-by-hour narrative, so you experience the day as it unfolded for people in the thick of it instead of as history summarized after the fact. He used the same approach in this earlier book on 9/11, drawing on the voices of air traffic controllers, firefighters, office workers in the towers, and the staffers aboard Air Force One, which, after American airspace was shut down that morning, was the only plane in the sky (hence the title of the book). Even if you think you know the story of 9/11, the book gives you a fresh, visceral, and incredibly compelling perspective on the day. Despite the page count, the oral narrative format makes it a quick read — something you can knock out over the weekend. 

Flint and Tinder Bone Button Western Shirt. Ever since high school, I’ve had a pearl snap western shirt in my wardrobe. It’s a classic piece of casual menswear, and a versatile one. You can wear it buttoned up on its own or as an overshirt thrown over a tee. It’s a piece that invariably looks good with the sleeves rolled up. For the past several years, the western shirt in my rotation has been this rendition from Flint and Tinder, which trades the traditional pearl snaps for burnt cow bone snaps. Made in the USA to boot. I have it in the medium wash. Easy and handsome. 

“The Fire of Drift-Wood” by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. I’ve always loved the poetry of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. He’s got some real bangers, which is why we included three of his poems in our book Manvotionals: “The Builders,” “The Light of Stars,” and “The Village Blacksmith.” But I had never read “The Fire of Drift-Wood” until Kate shared it with me this week after Dying Breed reader Kyle P. shared it with her. I really enjoyed it. The poem finds two reunited friends talking by a fire, reminiscing about what once was, and what might have been had their lives not gone in different directions. As the literal and metaphorical driftwood — parts of the past that have been broken up and carried away by time — burn, old memories and yearnings spark up again. It’s a melancholy poem, but a beautiful one.

On our Dying Breed newsletter, we published My 8 Highest ROI Habits and Sunday Firesides: The $30,000 Sofa.

Quote of the Week

Never put yourself in a position, no matter what the inducement — whether a big salary or other financial reward, or the promise of position or influence — where you cannot act the part of a man. Let no consideration tie your tongue or purchase your opinion. Regard your independence as your inalienable right, with which you will never part for any consideration.

—Orison Swett Marden

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

Launching the redesign of the Art of Manliness has gotten me thinking about our history, and how my understanding of manliness has evolved, deepened, and changed over that nearly two-decade-long span.

The idea for the Art of Manliness came to me in a Borders (RIP) bookstore. As I browsed their selection of men’s magazines, I thought about how they all generally had the same kind of articles: a highlight of the hot babe of the month, a feature on a $10,000 watch, a profile of a celebrity I didn’t care about. Not a lot of it resonated with me as an average guy, a married law student on a budget, and it felt like there was more to a man’s life that wasn’t being covered.

So I decided to start the kind of men’s lifestyle magazine I’d want to read. Something more practical, useful, and edifying. I’ve never been particularly interested in gender, so I had no intention of using my soon-to-be-launched blog as a place to examine maleness from a sociological or anthropological perspective, or to hash out debates between the sexes. I started AoM to be another men’s lifestyle magazine like Esquire, GQ, or Men’s Health — just scaled down into a smaller-time publication. It set out to be a blog that covered the principles and skills, in every area of life from health to finance to character, that make for a fulfilling, mature, and successful adulthood — aimed at men.

And that’s what we’ve been doing ever since: on AoM you’ll find articles on everything from how to throw a punch to how to make polite conversation to how to establish healthy habits. It operates in the spirit of Marcus Aurelius’ mantra: “Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.”

That being said, I have seen the value of occasionally delving into the important question of what makes for a good man, or for a man, period. AoM offers advice on things men are, on average, interested in and should be well versed in, and it’s helpful to have some context on just why men are drawn to those things and should be proficient in them.

So from time to time, we’ve dived deeper into the question of what manliness is, anyway.

In the early days of AoM, my idea of manliness was very centered on its more philosophical — and ancient — definition.

In his Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle set out a code of ethics for men to live by. For the philosopher and many of the ancient Greeks, manliness meant living a life filled with eudaimonia — human flourishing. Aristotle believed that man’s purpose was to take actions guided by rational thought that would lead to excellence in every aspect of his life.

For the ancient Romans, manliness meant living a life of virtue. In fact, the English word “virtue” comes from the Latin word virtus, which meant manliness or masculine strength. The Romans believed that to be manly, a man had to cultivate virtues like courage, temperance, industry, and dutifulness.

For Aristotle and the Romans, manliness centered on striving for excellence and virtue in all areas of your life, fulfilling your potential as a man, and being the best brother, friend, husband, father, and citizen possible. And this remained the dominant definition of manliness in the West up through the 19th century.

Someone may question this definition of manliness by saying, “Wait, shouldn’t women be striving for this kind of virtue and excellence as well?”

Of course.

With this definition of manliness, manhood is the opposite of boyhood rather than womanhood. It’s something you achieve as you progress past childhood to maturity. A child is self-centered, fearful, and dependent. A man is bold, courageous, respectful, independent, and of service to others. Thus a man becomes a man when he matures and leaves behind childish things. Likewise, a woman becomes a woman when she matures into real adulthood.

Both sexes are capable of and should strive for virtuous, human excellence. You could say that when a woman lives the virtues, that is womanliness, and when a man lives the virtues, that is manliness.

This is not to say that the sexes are identical. In The Code of Man, Dr. Waller Newell argues:

We need to aim for the highest fulfillment of which all people are capable—moral and intellectual virtues that are the same for men and women at their peaks—while recognizing the diverse qualities that men and women contribute to this common human endeavor for excellence. We need a sympathetic reengagement with traditional teachings that stress that while men and women share a capacity for the highest virtues, their passions, temperaments, and sentiments can differ, resulting in different paths to those common pinnacles.

Which is to say that women and men strive for the same virtues, but often attain them and express them in different ways. The virtues are lived and manifested differently in the lives of sisters, mothers, and wives than in brothers, husbands, and fathers. Two different musical instruments, playing the exact same notes, will produce two different sounds. The difference in the sounds is one of those ineffable things that’s hard to describe with words, but easy to discern. Neither instrument is better than the other; in the hands of the diligent and dedicated, each instrument plays music that fills the spirit and adds beauty to the world.

The idea that manliness = virtue remains the primary ethos that undergirds AoM and the fundamental way I answer the question “What is manliness?”

But there came a time when I got curious about another question: what exactly lends men and women their distinct temperaments? What is it that shapes the male and female “instruments” in different ways, resulting in the distinct music they make?

So back in 2014, we took a really deep dive into finding out. Around this time, the media was going through one of its periodic cycles in which there’s a lot of handwringing about the state of men. Various media outlets and public personalities were putting out commentary and think pieces on the nature of masculinity and what was the matter with men. A lot of this had a negative slant on the nature of men, and little of it was very incisive or helpful. So we decided to add our own, hopefully sound, balanced, and illuminating voice to the mix.

The result was a book-length series on the biological influences and evolutionary pressures that shaped the nature of masculinity and the universal cultural imperatives that grew out of it. The research and writing of that series really enhanced my understanding of the reality of that nature and the significance of its repercussions. If you haven’t read it, I recommend it; I think it’s both interesting and accessible, and it ends with how to integrate the knowledge of the biological/anthropological/evolutionary nature of masculinity into living a fulfilling life as a modern man:

• Part I: The 3 P’s of Manhood — Protect
• Part II – The 3 P’s of Manhood — Procreate
• Part III – The 3 P’s of Manhood — Provide
• Part IV – The 3 P’s of Manhood in Review
• Part V – What is the Core of Masculinity?
• Part VI – Where Does Manhood Come From?
• Part VII – Why Are We So Conflicted About Manhood?
• Part VIII – The Dead End Roads to Manhood
• Part IX – Semper Virilis — A Roadmap to Manhood in the 21st Century

What emerged from that series doesn’t contradict the idea of manliness as virtue; rather, it casts light on why men are drawn to and defined by certain qualities more than others, especially by what The Way of Men calls the four tactical virtues: courage, strength, mastery, and honor. (By the way, we’ve done an incredibly in-depth series on honor as well, which is also available as an ebook).

Today, my definition of manliness consists of a synergy of two things: manhood (virtue) and masculinity (the biological/anthropological forces that have shaped the male nature). I think manliness comes down to the combination espoused by the people of Crete: being a good man, and being good at being a man.

I think there are objective standards for masculinity and manhood — they don’t just mean whatever you want them to mean — and an individual man can be closer or further from them. But I don’t think there’s just one way to embody those standards — one exact way to be a man. And I still don’t have an abiding interest in gender stuff or debates and recriminations between the sexes. I’m still just trying to put out a fun little men’s magazine.

I think the average guy is like that. He’s not thinking a ton about gender differences. He just wants to be himself, do valuable work in the world, feel confident and competent, and be a worthy husband, father, and friend.

Grasping the background context of manliness can help you better understand yourself as a man. And then once you’ve got that understanding, you just keep going on trying to live a good life. Just get skilled. Just become excellent. Just be cool, man.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

As I’m sure you’ve noticed, we just launched the latest of these designs. Allow us to walk you through it, and share where AoM’s been, where it’s at, and where it’s going.

Where We’ve Been

When I launched AoM back in 2008, I built the site myself, using rudimentary, self-taught HTML, PHP, and Photoshop. At this time in the cultural zeitgeist, there was a sense that the skills of manhood were no longer being passed down from generation to generation, that the art of being a man was disappearing. AoM was founded to help address this and revive the lost art of manliness, and so the first design had a distinctly vintage vibe, with a parchment-colored background and two John L. Sullivans gracing the masthead. It was crude, but got the job done.

In 2013, we were generating enough revenue from the site that I could hire a designer to make it look more professional, adding a wood-paneled background and a gentleman to the masthead to denote the balance of refined and rugged attributes that define true manliness. It still had that vintage, masculine vibe that conjured up a bygone era worth recapturing.

Around 2018 or so, this old-timey design started to feel dated. The whole artisanal, heritage-brand, mustache-everything trend had worked its way through the culture and begun to feel cartoonish and stale. At the same time, the internet had exploded in size and the amount of content out there had reached firehose-esque proportions. Guys had plenty of information on how to be a man, but there was a lack of emphasis on actually implementing it. We wanted to put an emphasis on taking action and getting stuff done.

So in 2019, we stripped the site down, got more minimal, and built everything around a new tagline — Get Action — which I lifted from a journal entry the young Teddy Roosevelt once scrawled to himself. The look went ’70s, which matched my mood of desiring less navel gazing and more just being cool and doing stuff.

Where We Are

Well, last year, we got the itch to redecorate the site again.

It’s 2026. AoM turned eighteen this year. We wanted a design that reflected AoM in its mature “adulthood” — something that synthesized our past, present, and future.

We had never been entirely happy with our previous designs (hence their turnover) and wanted something that felt more classic and could go a longer distance with us. And we wanted something that really reflected what we’re all about.

The other thing we wanted the new design to do is to highlight the fact that over the past eighteen years, AoM has grown into more than just AoM. Other prongs have grown out of it.

There’s The Strenuous Life, which a lot of you have joined. It’s basically a scouting program for grown men — an online/offline structure for putting the things we talk about on AoM into practice.

And there’s Dying Breed, the Substack newsletter Kate and I started last year for the more personal, more philosophical pieces that don’t quite fit here on AoM.

Each of these three projects forward our overall mission: helping individuals practice timeless virtues through thought, word, and deed. Dying Breed is the thought; Art of Manliness is the word; Strenuous Life is the deed.

Taken together, it’s an ecosystem of projects we’ve taken to calling McKay Inc, and we wanted the redesign to tie all of them together into one cohesive umbrella and provide entry points to them here on AoM.

We worked with a studio called Mythic Proportions to nail these desires. They didn’t just revamp our branding; they dug into our history and the people and ideas that have inspired AoM over the years to figure out what we’re all about. Then they did an awesome job distilling our mission and helping us create something that feels new, while also getting us back to our roots. Costel Tudose then coded it; he was absolutely indefatigable in patiently executing every little adjustment we wanted. 

We’re really happy with how the site turned out. It feels fun, and the internet could use some more personality. It also feels like coming home.

We brought back the wood paneling (view the site on a desktop/laptop for the full look). We brought back the parchment paper background. We brought back John L. Sullivan in his original Currier and Ives glory. And we kept the “Get Action” energy by animating him. If you click around the different categories, you’ll notice him in motion in different setups.

We’ve also updated the AoM logo. It harkens to old-school boxing gear. We think it looks pretty dang spiffy.

Our hope is that the design gives a nod to the past, both AoM’s and in general, while also looking fresh and modern. Because that’s what AoM is all about. It’s not a call to return to bygone eras, but to preserve what is good across time. We look back to move forward; we are committed to reviving and strengthening enduring principles. (Read more about our ethos on our About page.)

The new AoM website feels like the kind of classic design I’ve been reaching for for almost twenty years, and I think it will finally endure longer than five.

Where We’re Going, Or, Why Invest So Much in a Website in 2026???

Now, you might be asking why we’d pour this much into a website in this current moment of the digital age. “Blogging” is dead. No one visits websites anymore. Everyone is on YouTube, Instagram, and TikTok. Websites are so 2010. People can just ask ChatGPT half of the content we publish and get an answer in three seconds.

Well, AoM’s ethos has always been philosophically contrarian. And maybe this is an extension of that contrarian impulse.

I know a lot of people don’t really surf the internet anymore. I get it. The world has changed. But I still like to surf the web. I still like to visit websites. I like the finitude of it. When you’re done reading the thing, you move on to something else without having more slop shoveled into your mind gullet via the stream.

I like the serendipity of websites, too. With ChatGPT, you’ve got to already know what you’re after. You’re not surprised with LLMs. But with websites, you might stumble upon something you didn’t even know you were looking for. You learn something you didn’t know you wanted to know.

I think there’s still a place on the internet for serendipity, surprise, and content that makes your brain feel good instead of gross.

I want AoM to feel like an oasis from the cacophony of the infinite feed. It’s a place you visit the way you’d visit your favorite coffee shop or a used bookstore that’s always been there. Somewhere you can sit down, relax, browse around, and walk out feeling a little better than when you came in.

Rather than being something you have to have a certain app or a question formulated to visit, I want AoM to be a place you can wander into on your browser of choice, poke around, and find something you didn’t know you needed, or get reminded of something you used to do, but stopped doing, but should maybe start doing again.

So stop by AoM whenever you want. We’ll have a chair, along with some conversation and refreshments, waiting for you.

While I have you here now, I want to say a big thank you to everyone who’s been here since the start. A lot of you found AoM back in 2008 and have basically grown up alongside me. Some of you have been reading AoM since high school and now have kids of your own. Thank you for the emails and the letters and the kind words over the years. Thank you for sharing a podcast episode or an article with a friend, or your dad, or your brother-in-law. Even in a world of algorithmically-driven virality, word of mouth is still the best way for things to spread. That word of mouth means everything to us. It’s the best compliment we can get.

We’re looking forward to this next chapter. As long as we’ve got things we want to write about, we’ll be keeping the lights on here at our little hangout off the world wide web’s beaten path. We’re going to keep on doing our thing, because we like doing our thing. Thanks for supporting this thing.

Get Some Free AoM Stickers!

To celebrate the launch of our redesign, we’re giving away a set of three stickers with our new AoM logo. To claim yours, all you have to do is subscribe to our free newsletter. We got a daily option or a weekly option. Whatever works for you.

After you sign up, you’ll get an email asking for your address. Just enter it and we’ll send the stickers to you (make sure to input your address correctly!) completely free of charge. The offer is open to both international and domestic readers. The stickers will take several weeks to get to you as it will take time for the McKay children (got to put those kids to work!) to stuff and label envelopes.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

Back then, Mark was an Army major and cavalry officer with two young sons. His unit would be out in front of the main force, and during an intelligence briefing, he was told it could suffer casualties as high as 50 percent. Mark realized there was a real chance he might not come home. So he began writing down what he was experiencing, along with the lessons about life, leadership, and character that he wanted his boys to know if he wasn’t there to teach them himself.

Mark did come home, and went on to serve 38 years in the Army, including as an assistant division commander in Baghdad and later commander of the 1st Armored Division in Iraq during the 2007–2008 surge, before finishing his career as commander of U.S. Army Europe.

Decades later, that wartime journal became the basis for his new book, If I Don’t Return. Today on the show, retired three-star General Mark Hertling and I talk about the reflections it contains on making every day count, planning for friction, marriage and friendship, handwritten notes, casual profanity, the moral weight of war, and what it means to build a man.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

Harakiri. My latest Zone 2-watching, trying-to-become-a-film-buff movie was this 1962 Japanese samurai film directed by Masaki Kobayashi. It’s one of the best movies I’ve ever seen. The cinematography is amazing; nearly every scene could be a photo you could hang up in your house. But the story and acting are what make this film great. Harakiri is set in 17th-century Japan, during an era of peace that had left thousands of samurai without masters or livelihoods, and it explores how those warriors dealt with decline, along with the sometimes brittle nature of honor culture. There’s a scene where a young ronin is forced to commit seppuku with a bamboo sword. I’m still thinking about it. Absolutely brutal. 

“Pray Without Ceasing” by Wendell Berry. Wendell Berry died this week at his farm in Port Royal, Kentucky, at age 92. He was one of my favorite writers. Jayber Crow is my favorite of his novels (I’ve recommended it before), and I’ve also enjoyed his poetry and his non-fiction about agrarian living, the importance of community, and not letting money and technology overtake our lives and dictate our values. One of my favorite short stories of his is “Pray Without Ceasing,” which appears in Fidelity: Five Stories. It takes place in Berry’s fictional town of Port William, the setting for a lot of his fiction. The story is about a guy who was shot and killed by his friend, who was drunk and despairing after mortgaging away his farm to cover his son’s debts. When a crowd gathers to avenge the murder…well, I’ll let you read it to see what happens. The story inspired one of my favorite songs, “Decent Man” by James McMurtry, son of Lonesome Dove author Larry McMurtry. Give the story a read and pick up some other works by Berry while you’re at it. You won’t regret it.

Osprey Atmos AG 65. Fall is here, and with it, prime backpacking season. My go-to backpack for the past several years has been the Osprey Aether Go AG (the AG stands for “anti-gravity”). The anti-gravity system is a tensioned mesh panel that suspends the pack away from your back, which keeps you nice and cool and just feels nice to wear. It’s comfortable. Osprey discontinued the AG suspension in the Aether line, but they still use it in their Atmos packs. If my Aether ever gives out, the Atmos AG 65 is what I’ll probably replace it with. If you’re looking to get into backpacking, check out our guide on how to take your first backpacking trip. Backpacking is certifiably the best form of outdoor recreation (while car camping is the worst!).

Ordinary Abundance. This fun, interactive website takes you on a scrolling tour through a modern apartment, stopping at everyday objects (a lamp, a fridge, the washing machine) to show you what people said about these things before they were invented or when they were brand new. In 1888, Edward Bellamy imagined that being able to queue up whatever music you were in the mood for, on demand, would represent the attainment of “the limit of human felicity.” An observer who was around for the advent of the telegraph called it a “perpetual miracle, which no familiarity can render commonplace.” Modern comforts and innovations now seem so ordinary that we take them for granted and walk past them without giving them a second thought. This site really puts things into perspective about how fortunate we are to be living in 2026.

On our Dying Breed newsletter, we published 16 Pieces of Practical Life Advice From William James.

Quote of the Week

No true man can live a half life when he has genuinely learned that it is only a half life. The other half, the higher half, must haunt him.

—Phillips Brooks

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

Americans love hamburgers, and few foods have been interpreted in as many different ways. From Connecticut to Southern California and everywhere in between, cooks and grillmasters have developed their own regional takes, each with a particular ingredient or preparation methodology that sets it apart.

Regional burgers are perhaps a little less rigid than you might expect (especially when compared to regional hot dogs). While some styles have strong traditions around their toppings, most are defined less by a strict list of ingredients than by one key cooking method or signature ingredient: cheese sealed between the patties, peanut butter melted over the patty, or a pile of hot pastrami, for example.

In most cases, what matters is nailing the element that gives the burger its regional identity. Consider this a guide to the essential character of each style rather than a set of hard-and-fast rules. 

The only thing left is to either embark on the great American road trip to test them out or simply do some experimenting in your own kitchen or backyard. Dig in! 

Illustrated by Ted Slampyak

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

Today on the show, Angela, whose latest book is Situated: Find the People and Places That Bring Out Your Best, shares how our environments play a much bigger role in shaping us than we realize. She explains the three-box model of behavior, why relying on willpower is a fallible strategy for altering your habits, and why the most effective way to change yourself is to change what’s around you. We discuss how different situations bring out different versions of ourselves and how to shape your surroundings to encourage good habits, mitigate bad ones, and become who you want to be — whether that means rearranging what’s on your desk or moving across the country.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

On a recent episode of the AoM podcast, I talked with Jordan Grumet, a hospice doctor and the author of The Purpose Code.

In our interview, Jordan drew a distinction between what he calls “big P purpose” and “little p purpose.” While the former focuses on your why, the latter is about your what.

Big P purpose is the singular, change-the-world project many people feel they’re supposed to discover and build their lives around — the thing they were meant to do. The problem with big P purpose, Jordan says, is that a lot of people can never figure out what their overarching thing is. They spin their wheels for years searching and searching for their one true calling in life. Some even start feeling bad that they haven’t found it and experience an angst psychologists call “purpose anxiety.”

But when researchers define purpose, they’re just looking at things that give someone a sense of action, direction, and goals, and those are qualities that can be had in a much smaller, less existentially fraught form.

Little p purposes are any activities you enjoy doing for their own sake. You’d do them even if they didn’t come with pay or accolades. They’re intrinsically pleasurable pursuits that just light you up. A little p purpose could be fixing old motorcycles, collecting baseball cards, running half-marathons, or volunteering at a soup kitchen on the weekends.

You can have more than one little p purpose, and even though they’re small pursuits, they can add up to significant meaning and a lasting legacy.

When Jordan was describing little p purposes on the podcast, I kept thinking of one person who exemplified the truth of just how life-enriching they can be: my grandpa, William “Bill” Hurst.

Bill Hurst, Little P Purpose Stacker

I’ve talked about my grandpa, Bill Hurst, before on the site. I published the eulogy I gave at his funeral ten years ago. He’s a big inspiration behind AoM.

Bill was a third-generation forester who worked for the U.S. Forest Service for nearly 40 years, finishing his career as Regional Forester of the Southwestern Region, where he managed the national forests and grasslands of New Mexico, Arizona, Texas, and Oklahoma.

On paper, his Forest Service career looks like it was a big P purpose for Grandpa. And I’m sure it was. Bill was very proud of his work and his family’s legacy in helping to manage federal land and its natural resources.

But his Forest Service career wasn’t the only iron he had in the purpose fire. Outside work — and especially after retirement — Grandpa stacked together a bunch of interests for himself: hobbies, clubs, service projects, and causes.

To inspire your own pursuit of little p purposes, I’m going to walk you through those my grandpa cultivated from his 40s into his 90s.

Restoring Antique Horse-Drawn Buggies

An article the Albuquerque Journal did about my grandpa in 1972.

When he was in his 40s, Grandpa started collecting and restoring horse-drawn buggies from the 1880s to the 1910s.

Why the interest in buggies? Well, Bill grew up riding and driving a horse and buggy in Southern Utah. As he told an Albuquerque Journal reporter who did a story about him and his hobbies, “[the buggy] was the only transportation we had until I was 16 or 17, and even after Dad got a Model T, we still had the buggy.” In his early work as a forester, he’d often use a horse and buggy to get around places. So there was a nostalgia factor that drew him to this hobby.

Grandpa not only enjoyed fixing up buggies, but chasing after the parts that made the restorations possible. Restoring 19th-century buggies in the 1950s and 60s — before the advent of the internet — required a lot of on-the-ground sleuthing.

Grandpa posing with a charcoal buggy heater. You’d put charcoal in the heater, light it up, and keep it by your feet when you were driving your buggy in the cold.

If he couldn’t find a part or replacement that fit exactly, he’d have to machine something or tweak modern materials to make them work. This was another appeal of buggy restoration: the improvisation. Grandpa credited his career in the Forest Service for instilling this ability to alter and jerry-rig: “In the Forest Service you have to be self-reliant and build things yourself, so I don’t have any trouble with a piece of work,” Grandpa said in his Albuquerque Journal interview.

Restoring Phonograph Players

Grandpa with one of the phonographs he restored. He carved that ornate panel with nothing but a pocket knife.

Besides restoring antique buggies and surreys, Bill also developed a passion for restoring phonograph players. I’m sure there was a nostalgia factor with this hobby, too, but what specifically kickstarted the interest was inheriting a broken 1920s Sonora player from his grandmother. When he couldn’t find anyone to repair its broken spring, he decided to do it himself.

After plenty of old-school gumshoe work to find a replacement part, an Arizona antique dealer connected Grandpa with a parts dealer out of Richmond, VA who went by “A. Nugent.” Grandpa wrote Nugent, Nugent mailed back the spring with an invoice, and Bill got the Sonora working again. Nugent became Grandpa’s source for parts, and he was soon restoring other phonographs too.

Just as with the buggies, Grandpa often had to improvise during his phonograph restorations. For one cabinet player, the scrollwork panel that covers the horn where the sound comes out was broken, so Grandpa carved a duplicate with just his trusty pocket knife. How’s that for handy!

Several of the phonograph players Grandpa restored are still in the family. My mom has one, along with a large collection of records. I’ll be fighting my siblings for it. I want that thing!

Horse Pack Trips

When retirement came, Grandpa continued his buggy and phonograph restoration, but he also developed other little p purposes to fill his newly acquired free time.

He’d go on regular horse and mule pack trips through the mountains of the West, from New Mexico to Oregon, well into old age. He’d often go with his son or with a group called the Wilderness Trail Riders. Sometimes he went on these pack trips by himself.

Reading through his memoirs, it looks like Grandpa didn’t hang up the reins on his last pack trip until he was in his early 80s. He loved his horses and being out in nature.

Clubs and Service

In the 19th and early 20th centuries, there was an American male archetype called “the clubman.” This was a guy whose wallet was stuffed with membership cards to all sorts of clubs and fraternal organizations. Grandpa Hurst was definitely a clubman. Like a lot of Greatest Generation men, he was a joiner.

Grandpa belonged to the Rotary Club, the Lions Club, the Society of American Foresters, and the Society for Range Management and earned awards from all of those organizations for his service. Grandpa was also active in Scouting as an adult leader and was awarded the Silver Beaver for his years of distinguished service.

Through his involvement in these groups, Grandpa was able to scratch his itch to serve and be useful. It also provided a social outlet for his affable temperament.

Through the Rotary Club, Grandpa got involved with Meals on Wheels as a food deliverer. I remember visiting him in New Mexico as a kid and watching him go out for his deliveries. He was probably in his 80s when he was doing this, and I remember thinking, “Shouldn’t you be the one getting food delivered to you? You’re the old guy.” But Grandpa was spry and liked to be helpful. He understood being old often meant being lonely, so he thought it was important to spend time with his elderly, less mobile peers.

Staying Connected to Conservation

Even after retiring from the Forest Service, Grandpa stayed in the conservation game. He was a charter member and past president of the Society for Range Management. He continued writing papers to help influence policy on the state and federal level. He’d regularly meet with congressmen and governors about forest and land issues. He spent several decades of his retirement organizing his papers and diaries about his Forest Service work so they could be donated to Utah State University. 

Protecting the Kaibab Squirrel

When my grandpa was in his late 90s, he started an advocacy group for a squirrel.

When Bill was nine years old, he encountered a Kaibab squirrel, a subspecies of the tassel-eared Abert’s squirrel found on the Kaibab Plateau in Northern Arizona and nowhere else on earth. He took a keen interest in the critter from then on and looked out for it during his years as Regional Forester.

As he approached his 100th birthday, he rounded up some friends and family and formed the Friends of the Kaibab Squirrel, a group dedicated to educating government agencies and citizens about the animal so its population wouldn’t decline. It’s still going. You can buy a lapel pin to support the organization.

Grandpa Hurst’s Little P Purposes Left an Outsized Legacy

One of Jordan’s arguments for pursuing little p purposes (besides being intrinsically enjoyable) is that they’re one of the best ways to find and foster community — and that community is one of the best ways to find joy and meaning.

When you pursue something that lights you up, other people take notice. People want to mentor you and learn from you and collaborate with you. Little p purposes attract others and bring people into your life.

That was Grandpa’s life exactly. When his buggy restoring pastime got write-ups in a farming magazine and the Albuquerque Journal, strangers started calling to offer him buggies. It connected him to an Oklahoma City craftsman who restored buggies for the Cowboy Hall of Fame and to collectors all over New Mexico and Utah. His phonograph restoration hobby turned that mysterious parts dealer in Richmond, “A. Nugent,” into a pen pal and made Grandpa the guy the local paper’s help hotline sent its phonograph questions to. His range society work had him rubbing shoulders with everyone from ranchers to U.S. senators. His Meals on Wheels volunteering kept him in regular contact with other seniors in his area.

What’s more, my grandfather’s life affirms the argument Jordan also makes that pursuing your little p purposes often creates the legacy many people are looking to leave when they search for their big P purpose.

The small contributions Bill continued to make to conservation during retirement definitely left a mark. And watching Grandpa tinker and volunteer and squirrel-advocate his way through four decades of retirement shaped how I and the rest of his grandkids think about what a good life looks like. He kept himself busy being useful and being curious about the world and other people for all of his life. When I grow up, I want to be like my Grandpa Hurst.

Small Purposes Add Up

If you’ve spent years trying to figure out your life’s purpose and keep coming up empty, my grandpa’s example points to a different way to go about it. Quit hunting for the one big thing you were meant to do and start pursuing some little things instead.

If you’re wondering where to start looking for your little p purposes, Jordan suggests thinking back to what lit you up as a kid. If you look at my grandpa’s little p purposes, most of them were sparked in his childhood. He grew up with buggies and phonograph players and found an itch to restore them. He met a rare squirrel when he was nine, and it inspired him to start an advocacy group for it when he was 100.

Bill Hurst’s life shows that when you follow your small interests, you can create a big, meaningful life for yourself.

Be sure to listen to my podcast with Jordan Grumet about how to find your little p purposes:

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.

In the two-way dance of social interactions, there’s plenty you can do to act smoothly yourself — from smiling and giving good eye contact, to asking good questions and demonstrating genuine interest.

But there are also ways to make things as easy as possible for the other person to execute their end of the exchange. Instead of making them feel awkward and really sweat to get to know you, you facilitate their social prowess. This not only enhances their “performance,” but makes the mutual interaction more enjoyable and successful for the both of you.

Here’s how to give a new acquaintance a helping hand:

Wear a Conversation Piece

One of the things people struggle with most is simply initiating conversation in the first place. They don’t know what to say to break the ice.

You can make it easier for folks to approach you by wearing something that naturally elicits a compliment or question. Not something cheesy or kitschy — while people may notice an outright novelty item and ask you about it, they’ll have already formed an impression of you as a bit of a clown. Rather, display something like a watch, tie, or lapel pin that’s subtly different or interesting, or a t-shirt emblazoned with a band, team, or place someone may also have an affinity for or want to know more about. From experience, I can also say that having a mustache is a can’t-miss conversation starter.

Make Your Name Easy to Remember

Exchanging names is typically Act I in meeting someone new. Yet we all know from experience how easy it is to forget someone’s name literally 10 seconds after they say it. Once this happens to someone, the realization will nag at the back of their mind, distracting them from the conversation. They will also be more hesitant to say your name again and will feel less confident about interacting the next time they run into you.

It’s so easy to forget a name because the stress of small talk blocks it from being absorbed. The following tips work against this phenomenon, and can help your new acquaintance more readily remember your name:

Say it clearly. This seems like common sense, but when you tell others your name, do they often respond with “Huh?” or “What’s that?” If so, you need to articulate better (watch the mumbling), and maybe slow down some. If you’re in a noisy place, make sure you say your name with sufficient volume.

If your name is foreign or unusual, you’ll want to say it even more slowly and deliberately. Communication expert Carol Fleming recommends prefacing your offering of it with “My name is quite difficult for most people.” Since “you’ve warned them about your name, they’ll put extra effort into listening to it.”

If your name rhymes with something, pairing it with that can help too. “My name is Gower, which rhymes with tower.”

Say “My name is . . .” rather than “I’m . . .”. Fleming recommends the former phrasing because it “gives the additional information that a name is coming, so the other person can be ready to receive it. The latter could go in any direction: I’m leaving now, I’m glad to meet you, I’m excited about the food, and so on.”

Add something about yourself. Part of the reason names are hard for people to remember is that they don’t yet have context to situate them in; there’s no mental scaffolding on which to hang the identifier. Therefore, Fleming advises, whenever someone asks you what your name is, also offer something about yourself. For example:

• “My name is Sam Lewis. My family just moved here from Toledo, and we’re looking for a new church to attend.”
• “My name is Jeff Jackson, and I was formerly in the accounting department but have been transferred here temporarily to work on the Acme Co. project.”

Adding a piece of information to your introduction not only makes your name more memorable, but it also gives the other person something to ask you about (“What prompted the move?”), helping them continue the conversation.

Give Expansive, Specifics-Filled Answers to People’s Questions 

Coming up with questions during conversation is a function of the information the other person shares. You tell me you’re from California, and I ask which part. You tell me you work in marketing, and I ask how you got into that field.

The less information you give when answering other people’s questions, therefore, the harder you make it for them to generate a good follow-up question, and the more likely it is that things will descend into awkward silence.

It would be nice if we lived in a world where everyone knew how to ask the kind of open-ended questions that elicit more expansive, information-filled answers, rather than close-ended questions that elicit just a single word reply, but alas, we do not.

Instead, chances are that a person you strike up a conversation with will primarily ask you the latter type: “Are you liking this class?” “Are you new here?” If you take the conversational bait and answer with a single word — “Yeah” — they’ll be lost as to what to ask you next.  

So give people a helping hand by offering more expansive, detail-rich answers, even if they ask you a closed-ended question. Don’t prattle on, mind you, but move beyond “Yes” or “No” to offer a full sentence or two. And pepper your responses with specifics on names, places, etc., as generalities give the other person little to latch onto.

• “Yeah, this class has been great. I was a history major, but taking Philosophy 101 convinced me to switch, and I’m really glad I did.”
• “No, you just haven’t seen me around because I just got back from doing a sabbatical in Germany.”

Hopefully, you’ve given them enough fodder to easily ask a follow-up question: “Who did you have for Philosophy 101?” “What did you do in Germany?”

Describe Your Job in Terms People Can Understand

Just as giving one-word answers throws a roadblock into the conversation, so does describing your job in a vague, confusing, or technical way. Asking what someone does is usually done very early in the conversation, and if the other person doesn’t know how to respond to your answer, the nascent exchange can grind to a halt.

For example, instead of just saying “I’m in finance” or explaining your job in venture capital with lots of insider buzz words, say: “I’m in the finance/investing world. I work for a venture capital firm that, instead of looking for “sexy” tech startups, finds family-owned companies in ‘boring’ industries like HVAC or billboards and helps the company to expand or the owners to retire. I’m the one who looks for companies that might be the right fit for us to invest in or buy.”

When you explain your job, it helps to supply the answers to three questions: What do you do? For whom? And how? In conveying this information, the other person will understand more about your work, and will be able to more easily ask you follow-up questions about it — keeping the good vibes of your convo rolling.

With our archives now 4,000+ articles deep, we’ve decided to republish a classic piece each Sunday to help our newer readers discover some of the best, evergreen gems from the past. This article was originally published in August 2019.

This article was originally published on The Art of Manliness.