The Adventures of Pirate Bendy

Relays be tough when ye only have one leg

2010-09-21T07:17:00.000-07:00

Aye, I got talked into (hijacked fer) another relay.

It be Hood t' Coast time agin 'n me team needed me assistance. Luckily it be me navigation skills an' not me runn'n talent they needed. 197 miles on a peg leg be no fun.

Obviously since I be in charge o' navigation I got th' best seat in th' van. Not just fer th' view, but also upwind from th' smelly runners.

Cap'n Marauder Mike - stay t' th' starboard here.

Seriously, th' relay be a lot o' fun (mostly on accoun' o' I wasn`t running).

Th' accomodations could have b'n better though. I like th' trips whar we stay in th' fancy hotels much better.

Back off ye landlubber! - Cap'n Marauder Mike be still in here.

By th' end o' th' weekend tho Cap`n Marauder Mike be a wee bit cranky. Arr he thought he knew whar he was goin' 'n' didn't appreciate me navigation assistance any more.

Wait till he finds out I set th' voice on his GPS t' "Swashbuckler".

"Hard-a-port Matey, in one half mile! Arrrr!"

The Legacy of Pirate Bob

2010-08-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

Poor ol' Pirate Bob. He was actually a big fat chicken 'n th' thought 'o sailin' on th' ocean scared th' bejeezus out 'o him.

This creek was th' only place whar he was brave to set sail.

Run Fer Yer Lives !!!

2010-08-05T06:45:00.000-07:00

Giant seagulls be attackin' from outer space !!!

Finally the rest of me voyage to Mexico

2010-07-09T06:50:00.000-07:00

Sorry I didn't get back sooner to be tellin' more 'bout me trip to Mexico, but I`ve been out huntin' th' elusive Pacific Northwest Summer. Someone stole it 'n I had to find it. 'tis now arrived 'n made a late but grand entrance so I'll get back to th' tale 'o me trip to Mexico.

As I said before, 'tis trip was not all a ruckas 'n games. thar was adventure ('tis BE th' "Adventures 'o Pirate Bendy" after all) 'n dangers to be faced.

It all looks so peaceful 'n relaxin', but be careful whar ye be off swimmin'.

Crocodiles tend to be fond 'o a pirate midday meal special.

And a simple stroll into town seems innocent enough. Th' coconut palms be pretty an' a nice coconut could be handy if a buccanneer be thirsty fer a pina colada.

But then, th' coconut palms attack without warnin'.

I had a headache fer days.

I wanted to sleep it off, but th' "one size fits all" hammock was a wee bit problematic.

'Twas Work Related Travel

2010-05-11T16:04:00.000-07:00

Why did I go t' Mexico ye ask? 'Twas work related travel.

It wasn't all fun 'an games. Although ye don't often get th' chance t' watch Flamingos play golf.

OK so part 'o it be fun an' games (an' grog).

I really went thar fer a couple o' reasons.

I had t' scout some new spots t' hide loot.

Most importantly, tho I needed t' restock th' cannonball supply room.

Ya scurvy dog!

Ships? We don't need no stinkin' ships!

2010-04-08T06:45:00.000-07:00

Fer me last trip, me crew convinced me t' try a different form o' transportation.

I thought th' captains quarters be pretty nice, but First Class pretty much rocks.

Th' view be pretty good from up here.

Mexico in February definitely has better weather than Oregon.

Whaddya mean th' return ticket t'ain't `exactly` first class??

Ya horn swogglin' landlubberss!

Shore Leave be over. Time to plan a voyage.

2010-02-22T11:19:00.000-08:00

Avast me hearties, me long shore leave be about t' come t' an end. Enough wit' th' lollygaggin' around fer th' winter. 'tis time t' hit th' road fer more adventures.

Th' question be where? I consulted a few mateys.

CowDog didn' really care as long as he gets t' go along.

Don't be tellin' CowDog, but I be not sure he's goin' along on accoun' o' when he gets wet,

well . . . lets say thar`s not room fer a barn sized cowdoghouse on me ship.

Howie thought pretty much anyplace would be fun. Howie thinks everythin' be fun.

Phoebe's response was I don't care where ye go jus' go 'n take Howie wit' ye. Th' sooner th' better. 'n don't even get me started about that dog.

So I still haven't decided where I be headed, but I'll be settin' sail soon.

Happy New Year from Pirate Bendy and CowDog

2010-01-01T07:30:00.000-08:00

So, I decided I needed I sidekick. I thought a dog would be nice. I found ou' I could grow me own.

Th' only problem be that th' more this dog grows, th' more he looks like a cow.

So anyway . . . Happy New Year from Pirate Bendy an' CowDog.

Escape From Canada (or "Never Trust the Bear in a Kilt")

2009-12-21T09:07:00.001-08:00

Sorry 'tis been a while since I posted an update, but I've been in hidin' from th' Mounties.

Th' Invasion o' Canada was goin' so well.

I snuck in on a ferry so they wouldn't be knowin' I was comin'.

I practiced fer me formal photos fer after I commandeered th' government.

I even tried t' recruit some locals. I thought this scallywag could be useful,

but I reckon he jus' turned around 'n leaked me plans

t' this scallywag..

So sneakin' back o'er th' border became a necessity.

Unfortunately it bacame clear that th' Mounties be onto me 'n they gave chase.

I considered lootin' an alternate getaway, but then decided . . . nah, not gonna happen.

I barely managed t' avoid bein' tossed into a Canadian prison, but I've added a new rule t' me handbook.

Never trust a bear in a kilt.

Thanksgiving 2009? BTDT already

2009-11-23T09:08:00.000-08:00

The best part about scheduling my invasion of Canada in October?

Arrrr Thanksgiving Dinner !!

The worst part about Thanksgiving in Canada?

Convincing some of the dinner guests to wait until dinner is ready.

Hamish . . . . put the pirate down, please.

I invaded Canada again

2009-10-27T08:24:00.000-07:00

Apparently me invasion o' Canada didn' make th' news. Perhaps I should 'ave floated o'er th' border in a helium balloon in order t' get me own reality show.

Th' first part o' th' invasion was delayed by several hours due t' an out o' service ferry. I knew I should 'ave brought me own ship.

They thought I was jus' hangin' around th' ferry terminal patiently. I was really jus' plottin' me revenge.

Whoa! 8 lanes o' cars be just a wee bit bigger than me ship.

Th' crew nattered me into this invasion 'cause they wanted t' do some sort o' race. I only came along on accoun' o' I be promised Thanksgivin' grub afterwards.

While they be ou' racin', I found an appropriate alternative.

Me next voyage

2009-10-08T07:17:00.000-07:00

`Tis about time fer me t' weigh anchor 'n head out on a voyage.

Sometimes 'tis hard t' decide which direction t' go.

Don't be tellin' anyone, but I be invadin' Canada this weekend.

I've been busy - haven't fergotten ye!

2009-10-04T11:07:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've checked in here. It's been a busy summer. I always stop to thank the lighthousekeepers.

blah blah blah Captain Cook blah blah blah. He's such a publicity hound.

Oh I almost forgot - now THAT was a fun party.

Time to make some plans fer me next voyage.

More about that later this week ye scurvy dogs!

Where does a Pirate Go on Vacation?

2009-08-30T14:19:00.000-07:00

T' th' coast, o' course.

Th' crew an' I tookst some time off t' jus' relax.

We did a wee bit sightseein' in Newport.

And spent a pleasant afternoon at th' pub. When ye`re namin' a grog, thar be some choices that be jus' a bit questionable.

Who is responsible

2009-08-02T07:07:00.001-07:00

for giving the lawn guy a week off??

How a Pirate Spends His Summer

2009-07-21T17:27:00.000-07:00

I've been busy

I did a little huntin'.

I did a little fishin'.

I did a bit o' recrutin'. Diego says he`ll be happy t' take care o' th' mice in th' hold.

I`ve also been practicin' fer me role in ths summers production o' Oklahoma.

♫♫ All th' world`ll fly in a flurry

When I takes ye ou' in th' surrey,

When I takes ye ou' in th' surrey wi' th' fringe on top!

Ya horn swogglin' bilge rat! ♫♫

It be a Mighty Tempest

2009-07-06T17:49:00.001-07:00

Th' waves be crashin' o'er th' bow. Hgher than I'd ever seen them.

It be so dark an' rainy we could hardly be seein' oer th' yardarm in th' middle o' th' afternoon.

It finally started gettin' lighter.

Eventually we sailed out o' th' storm.

At least th' ship be a lot cleaner now.

Happy Independence Day

2009-07-04T11:12:00.000-07:00

Avast ye rebellious bunch and Happy Independence Day!!

They're late for the solstice

2009-06-29T07:57:00.003-07:00

but I think the neighbors are building Stonehenge

I ran a relay in Utah last weekend.

2009-06-23T13:49:00.000-07:00

So - me crew said "let's run another relay".

I said, "will thar be grog?"
They said, "Sure!! 'n donuts!"

Then I found out it was in Utah. Utah? arrr no ocean, can't sail me ship thar 'n ye want me to run in mountains??

Thar had better be a lot 'o grog.

Some jolly lookin' women wouldn't hurt either.

This be th' before picture 'o me crew. Thar aren't any after pictures because after runnin' 188 miles in th' altitude, no one had th' strength left to hold th' camera.
I be a wee worried about th' one on th' far port thar. "Relay Start" an' "Rockettes Tryouts" aren`t easily confused, but ye never be knowin'.

About that guy in th' pank skirt? I`ll only say that thar be bets made an' some swabbies lost.

An important part o' a race like this be dressin' appropriately. They only had t' bring th' one extra shoe fer me.
Beads be a good accessory.
So 'tis be what me trusty parrot feels like.

They even let me navigate.

I reckon we'll leave plenty 'o room fer that van to be off first.
Finally, I got me grog.Ya horn swogglin' bilge rats!

Road Trip - A Pirate goes Wine Tasting

2009-06-14T15:12:00.000-07:00

Road trip time

Me crew said tis Wine Tastin' Time. I thought about if fer about a nanosecond an' decided. Arrrr. I be in.

I called shotgun!

Forgot me sunglasses, though.

Lucky fer me, Pirates don't 'ave t' pay th' tastin' fee.

See, I be willin' t' drink somethin' besides ale.

I be feelin' a bit tipsy, though.

Stand Back! I'm going to try Science!!

2009-05-17T20:00:00.000-07:00

So one o' me crew claims t' be a `scientist`*

* code for choosing a career path that leads to playing with expensive toys and the occasional opportunity to blow stuff up.

I decided to try out this science stuff.

He told me Scientists dasn't take baths, they submerge themselves in beakers. Th' lab version o' a jacuzzi. I'm not sure I believe him.

Oops lost me footin'. Do ye 'ave any idea how hard 'tis t' swim wit' a hook fer a hand 'n a stump where ye attach yer wooden leg?
Rinsin' th' soap off be important.

Keelhauling the 'Science Officer' may be next.

More of the Mexico Voyage (before Swine Flu)

2009-05-02T08:45:00.001-07:00

So I didn't drink beer the whole time I was in Mexico - I had water for breakfast but it still came in a beer bucket.

Th' jungle be . . . dark

Luckily thar was plenty 'o shade available. But i reckon th' crew put me up here to keep me away from th' beer.

Silly crew - beer is for pirates.

I think these be a hot seller on Wall Street last voyage.

One good thin' about livin' on a Pirate Ship - ye dasn't be havin' t' pay th' landscape company.

aye I be thar - look close.

Mexico be nice, I`ll probably invade again sometime after th' flu has run its course.

Arrr . . . Mexico

2009-04-07T19:00:00.000-07:00

Arrr . . . Mexico

There be nice harbors
There be nice beaches
There be ale
There be . . .

GOLF CAMP!!

Next time I wants t' go t' Golf Camp!

Relaxin' in Mexico

2009-03-22T07:30:00.000-07:00

Arrr . . . so, Mexico was a nice relaxin' trip.

I had time t' relax on th' beach,

take care o' th' important stuff,

'n I found a great sale on cannonballs. Perfect timin' too, on accoun' o' I be runnin' low.