Thar Shaddin

Re: LEVIATHAN

Ika — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:17:11 -0500

Ika, of course, had already been technically signed on long before she had even entered Corezo, hired by some high-class individual of the Eyropan empire who had heard rumor of her talents. Else, she would have had no reason to have come here. She certainly wasn't here to sight-see or buy property. People here spoke with accents and in strange languages that she had never heard before, or maybe it was just a single language that she was incapable of picking up on. Whatever the case, it was strange that a bunch of individuals were here to sign up for the hunt. She didn't know if it was coincidental or not.

She stood up straight from leaning over the table and began finishing off a second otter while trying to figure out what it was they were all saying. Two new men entered the inn, one with pale skin like he had long ago drowned and another she could have speared in the throat without much hesitation. Something about Scrap's eyes bothered her. She couldn't place what it was.

They spoke quickly, too quickly for her to catch, and with an attitude that made it sound like they were tripping over their own tongues and flicking them like snakes. Something about "fire" and then "names." Ika blinked.

"Ika," her face was pricelessly bemused, not a hint of understanding in her eyes.

Just because

Drayel — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 10:19:43 -0500

Availability: Open to anybody but please PM me first.

Posting Speed: Hopefully once a day but once every 3 days is okay too.

Characters Involved: Drayel

Location: In the city of Marn

Summary: Drayel is doing his regular rounds when his day starts going wierd. Through out the day he keeps having one problem to another all the while trying to keep his sanity.

Other Notes: More a humor thread then anything but I'm trying to help develop connections with characters.

Re: A Trip to the Country

Breda Dreaughan — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:21:15 -0500

In the sunny clearing, away from the threatening shadows, the sounds and smells of nature felt enjoyable, even comforting. Small birds approached the two women cautiously, apparently attracted by the bread crumbles. Breda watched them, smiling. They were quite more attractive lunch company than rats.

Licking the grease off her fingers, she nodded in response to Aura's comments. "Really nice. I'm starting to appreciate the forest." She tossed a piece of crust to the birds. Maybe one of them is a shapeshifter.

"Are you okay with the backpack?" She asked, slightly embarrassed that the other woman was doing all the carrying. At least they had eaten some of the weight.

Re: A Most Devious Deception

Fusha — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 23:57:42 -0500

NP I will in the morning or later tonight... dont be ashamed

Re: Zelos Shadow Strider

Frug — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 22:29:31 -0500

This is a rare occasion that a rule is being invoked. He's asked for a second opinion. http://www.tharshaddin.com/rules-staff.html

I've unlocked this and will handle reviewing it when it's been edited.

Re: Meeting of the Minds

Navarre — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 21:23:20 -0500

Navarre slowly lowered herself into a nearby chair, wincing as a familiar pain shot up her legs. Slowly but surely, her body was beginning to fail her: the aches came more frequently, each visit worse than the last; and even the most mundane tasks were becoming frustratingly difficult. As much as she enjoyed the prestige that came with her old age, she could do without the rest of the baggage. Fortunately, she would find herself renewed in the coming weeks, with a host of allies at her side, ready and willing to serve her.

The tension soon began to lift from her withered body. Once she became comfortable, she glanced up at Derin, who was busy with one of the many books the bloated fool had recommended. Although she felt obligated to help her ally, this graveyard business was becoming a thorn in her side. Just what was so special about that damned graveyard? Oh, she'd heard the rumors like everyone else, but nothing that warranted serious academic study. If Derin wished to chase after fairy tales, that was her own business. Still, it upset her to see her fellow immortal wasting her time on such frivolities.

She paused, frowning slightly. Was she being too dismissive of the graveyard's supposed magic? After all, few would have believed that her worthless husband's old scrolls contained the secret to eternal life. Dark magic lurked in the most unexpected of places, and rewarded those capable of seeking it out and mastering it. Perhaps she would look into Shim's graveyard with Derin, but only once her plan was in motion, and her soul was in a younger body. With such power flowing through her body, she doubted she'd have to worry about aches and pains.

"I'm still quite curious about this graveyard of yours, dear," Navarre spoke up after a while, seamlessly slipping into her kind persona. "If Modestine is correct, then there may be forces there that would best be left undisturbed. It's your decision, of course, but I only wonder what you stand to gain by investigating such a cursed land. The last thing I want is to lose my newest friend to some restless spirits."

Re: Zelos Shadow Strider

Saruna — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:48:24 -0500

This application is denied.

We appreciate your willingness to try to learn and grow as a writer, but we feel that at this time Thar is not the place in your personal evolution. You were game and enduring in chat when we were bringing up points about your character -- and I salute you for that -- but overall I get the sense from your edited character sheet that Thar is not, in the end, where your rp bent would be suited.

I suggest you take a peek over at our community & links section for other sites to try. One place we recommend in particular is here. It's a good intermediary, a place that has a more free-form setting while still encouraging character development and plot development. I wish you luck and perseverance as you continue to evolve your writing. If after you've had more experience with the world of writing you wish to try here again, we'll be here.

Best,

Kat

Re: Zelos Shadow Strider

Saruna — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 11:54:32 -0500

Though the vagaries of fashion are of course ever changing, I think perhaps a cowbow hat is not something that would be found in the Eurasian continent. Traditionally the herding cultures of Eurasia used tall, pointed hats (without brims -- they had the triangular eyefold that helped with the sun's glare), and as our North America never got settled by Europeans, they would not have given us the western style that produced cowboy hats.

The reason why we get so particular about stuff like this is due to the fact that certain words evoke very specific feels, and can rip people out of the setting.

A tip for you reguarding apostrophes: they are used to denote possessive words, measurements and contractions. You've got some scattered about your app that do nothing.

Your weaknesses do not balance out your strength. Zelos has no issue whatsoever with shifting, and he is essentially stronger than any given human. Essentially all that can hurt him is silver and his senses being overloaded, for which people do not typically carry silver on them and I'm not even sure how a sensory overload can be accomplished. Please go back through your weaknesses and explain 2, 4, and 7. As well, I would like to know exactly what sort of shadow magic he is capable of, and what it would take for him to be able to use it.

Please explain what happens when he goes into a rage.

A throwing knife has to be exquisitely balanced, and as such making one out of stone is a lost cause. Far more likely for a culture trapped in a stone age would be slings and simply throwing stones. Please replace the throwing knives with something more likely to be found within a culture who only use stone, animal parts and wood. Here's a good page on throwing sticks, slings and bolas: http://www.woodcraftwanderings.org/hunting.html

How did Zelos even find out he had magic? How did it express itself?

Using a bola to capture a bounty might not be the best idea, as they are capable of breaking bones.

Please leave a reply here or let me know in chat when you have made edits so I can reexamine your app.

Re: A Most Devious Deception

Fayane — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 09:36:51 -0500

Now I know I should have bookmarked it, but I can't find the dude who's history we're gonna kidnap Or...really the plan behind it as I was 3/4 dead when it was brought up. Mind running it by me real fast? -ashamed-

Re: Civic Opportunity

Anther — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 20:51:57 -0500

They didn't move Anther and Talion under the sun. But the moon was still welcome, still dazzling. Anther reached for it, blinking, and there was a hand on the back of his neck that collared him back to reality. He didn't like the feeling of skin on his own, and he jerked and stumbled as the hard fingers flexed. He was corralled. Pent up, cursed for a doom he hadn't agreed on.

It wasn't my fault!

Had he told that to the strange grasping human-daimons who'd gabbled and smirked in their knowing sick way? He'd meant to. Did it matter? When it came to the soul. . .

"I hate magic," he muttered. "Theogios -- "
"Shut up."

They shook him, and the world spun. Anther felt his lips part in a sloppy smile, his eyes jangling blurred colors and lines until everything settled and he was walking forward on his leash of flesh and bone.

"Want to dance?" He asked, but no one heard him.

They walked. Anther tried not to gawk at the normal buildings arranged just so on the normal streets, but their shadows spoke volumes, dark and dirty, and Anther tried not to step on them. He was tugged back onto the invisible line, marching forward. Was his soul tainted? Was he really and truly cursed? His heart rate sped, and he reached out to touch one of the shadows to see if it would take him, but he wasn't really brave. It didn't really occur to him until he'd been yanked out of reach, and he was giggling to himself when their escort presented him in front of a door.

The door was unremarkable in its strangeness. It didn't promise anything foul, but Anther knew that appearances were deceiving, oh yes. . .

It opened, and light at once brighter and softer than the moon's spilled out.

"No, I've no want t'fuck. Stop touchin' me," he said, loud and crude. A moment later he was cuffed on the back of the head, and he stumbled down to his knees still all jumbled and dizzy from lack of sleep. His head lolled back on his neck, and he spread his lips from his teeth in a grimace that was supposed to match the grin he'd given to his mates, long ago.

"Hullo."

Re: Hunted

Saruna — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 20:15:20 -0500

Okay, so this is the point where either Ran's followers come in or we combine threads with Fayane, Jerial and the doctor whose name I can never remember. Thoughts?

Re: A Trip to the Country

Aura Thesin — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:48:28 -0500

Aura glanced up at Breda's question. It was past time for lunch, according to the sun, so she nodded and led the shorter woman up the path another few moments. Off to one side was a small clearing, covered by a canopy of leaves, with large logs, obviously cut by saws, laying around a small pit.

Aura gestured to the logs, then seated herself, letting her pack slip off her back with a relieved sigh. She grinned at Breda, then began digging through her pack, pulling out a few pieces of bread, a large chunk of cheese, and small bit of ham. She handed two slices of bread with half the cheese and ham to Breda, keeping the other slices and rest of the cheese and ham for herself.

They ate slowly, in silence, as they both enjoyed the sound of nature around them. Birds chirped, and the wind could be heard moving through the trees. It was a welcome change from the bustle of Marn, and one of the major reasons Aura came out to the cabin.

Aura looked over at Breda as they ate. "It's nice out here, isn't it?"

Re: Hunted

Ran Azshmatha — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:24:37 -0500

In truth, Ran was too distraught to be surprised to Saruna's embrace, too lost in the thick of his emotions to protest. The comfort the old woman offered was close to maternal as Ran remembered, and though he did actively embrace her back, he allowed them to remain as they were until he was able enough to return, gently, to his own seat away from Saruna.

He drew a long, shallow breath, and let out a cathartic sigh. When Saruna assured him that he'd be able to return to the land of his birth, his own reaction surprised him; he had often assured himself of the same thing in the past, in moments of exquisite pain, loneliness, and passion. Yet the same statement, now expressed by the woman in front of him, felt far away and foreign. Ran pushed these thoughts to a corner of his mind, to consider later. He had been selfish long enough.

"Yes, I'd love to," he replied with the best smile he could manage.

Re: Death, the Dance, and Destruction of Humanity

Chezak D'Maroe — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:10:52 -0500

The first night after Amm was injured, Chezak found them a different spot to camp. It wasn't far from town, but it was a small, comfortable clearing, again near running water. He left Amm to rest as he prepared the camp and dinner again, and they all dropped off to sleep. It was early morning when they set out again.

Days went by, and the three companions settled into a quiet rhythm, although an uneasy one. There was little strife between the three, but there was also little communication. Amm made it clear that she led, and the other two followed, but other than keeping them with her, and having Chez explain various workings of humanity to her, she showed almost no interest in them beyond that.

Chez was a light sleeper, a natural prerequisite to an exile, living on the road and often surrounded by the dangers of nature, as well as the more vicious humanoids. He often woke at the same time Amm did, at her first movements. He watched her on occasion as she went about her morning salutation to the sun, as he began to refer to it. He never let her know, barely shifting, eyes slitted to watch her through his eyelashes.

It was one such morning, with Chez lying on his side watching Amm's graceful movements, that the morning sky lit brighter than simple sunlight could account for. He sat up, feeling the magic use wash over him, causing gooseflesh on his exposed arms and chest. A shiver coursed through him, violent, bordering on a shudder, at the feel of so much magic used. He glanced to Amm, who was staring in the same direction, then to Arusa. He stood, slipping into his shirt, and immediately began breaking camp.

Chez didn't want to be around when whatever had caused that magic came closer, if it did. And he didn't want to stay around to find out if it would come to them. And somehow, he had the feeling Amm would want to go see what had caused it.

Re: A Trip to the Country

Saruna — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 15:31:45 -0500

Also, there is currently the wreckage of a carriage on the path from Shim to Marn, leftover from another thread. There could be someone inspecting it, separate from the Guard, or spying on it waiting to see what the Guard is doing (could even be one of the reporters from the Paragon).