Stretch Mark Mama

Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The February 7, 2015 Edition

2015-02-07T03:00:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like a little winter weather to get some reading done. Of course, by "winter weather," I mean "rain." But at least with rain, there is no plowing or scraping to be done, which leaves more time for reading.

Carry On, Warrior: The Power of Embracing Your Messy, Beautiful Life :: I started following Glennon on Facebook for her humor, but ended up sticking around for her kindness. She has a great heart for others--including herself. The world needs more grace and I am glad she puts "words on paper" to do just that.

How We Learn: The Surprising Truth About When, Where, and Why It Happens :: I listened to this on audio once the Christmas music season was done and I had a huge void in my world. And I've got to say, for the psychology-majoring, education-immersive person that I am, this book was GREAT. I'd call it a "must read" for anyone who loves to teach or loves to learn. The book was filled with little tidbits of wisdom and -- isn't this meta -- I learned a lot from it's discussion on learning.

Food: A Love Story :: Jim Gaffigan has long been one of my favorite comedians. Maybe it's because his humor is so "white guy from the midwest," who knows. So I've heard all his schticks a number of times and yet--I still laughed out loud throughout his book. The best chapter, hands down, was "Seabugland," where he wrote about eating bugs from the sea. Tears, people. I laughed tears. (And by that I mean, I cried tears while laughing. No actual tears came out my mouth. Though that would've been something.)

Me, Myself, and Us: The Science of Personality and the Art of Well-Being :: Personality Science is my kind of science, you see. I'm always mulling and conversing on this topic, and this book gave me more fodder to work with. A related book I made my way clear through, thank you jury duty, was The Art of SpeedReading People: How to Size People Up and Speak Their Language. If you've always wanted to get a handle on the Myers-Briggs, this author explains it thoroughly and clearly, and not in an over-your-head kind of way (which is often typical of personality type books).

Cleaning House: A Mom's Twelve-Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement :: Firstly. The title of this book is fantastic. Really, all I needed from this book was to have it sitting around my house giving me permission to make my kids work. The author has plenty of good suggestions for how to get this done, of course. Since I'm such a systems person, I rarely need to be told how to do something; however, I did need a kick in the pants to get a system started. You'd be surprised how much I do for my kids--yes, those same kids who are home with me all. day. long. But for months now, my Inner Zelda has been working herself up to a frenzy, and this book was the impetus for making a plan. I can happily say that my kids are now sharing in more of the work at home. Ahhhhhh...

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 7

2014-11-04T10:15:00.000-08:00

Back when I had kids ages five, three, and one--I used to wonder how I could be home all day and yet get nothing done. Of course, that "nothing" meant anything outside of keeping three little humans alive. I watch parents in that stage now and wonder HOW IN THE HONKY-TONK I didn't just LOSE MY EVER-LOVING MIND. Caring for kids (and a house) is absolutely a full-time job, even if it doesn't seem very productive or you know, PAY.

So I carried this skewed perspective right on into my life of homeschooling--that of still being home with three kids (ages 13, 10, 8) and educating them at the same time. On paper, it seems like my schedule should allow for at least an hour or two of "free time" a day, right?!

BWAH HA HA HA HA!!!

Okay, so I get like a ten-minute break each day. Progress, people. This week I talk about the full-time "mindset" that homeschooling requires. Thanks for listening!

Homeschooling Is A Full-Time Job

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 6

2014-10-22T10:00:00.000-07:00

One rookie mistake I see homeschoolers make is thinking the key to "success" is in the curriculum. Now don't get me wrong, some programs do work better than others and it's worth the time to pick something good. HOWEVER. You can have the perfect workbook and the perfect schedule and the perfect schoolroom but guess what? YOU AND YOUR KIDS AIN'T PERFECT, and this is why "school" tends to break down. This is the hard work of homeschooling, and what I talk about in episode six of my series.

Academics are Easy Compared to Character Development

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Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The October 18, 2014 Edition

2014-10-18T19:51:00.001-07:00

To quote Lemony Snicket, "Keep anyone with whom you can read in silence." Isn't that the truth, especially for the introverts among us? Here are some books currently on my shelf.

I Work At A Public Library: A Collection of Crazy Stories from the Stacks :: Since I spend so much time at the library, I felt it was my civic duty to read this book. It took no more than an hour to read, as it's filled with little anecdotes about life at the library. My own eyes and ears (AND NOSE) tell me that the public library contains the fuuuullllll spectrum of humanity within its walls. This book has given me a new appreciation for my library and the librarians I love!

Parenting Without Power Struggles: Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm, and Connected :: I heard about this book (and author) through Momastery's Facebook Page -- and I'm telling you, she is worth a follow. I truly respect her humor and grace. So this book (not her's, by the way--just one she highly recommends) falls into the small pile of parenting books I can read without gagging. That's saying something, you know. She understands what makes kids (and their parents) "tick," and shares ways to parent that are neither too authoritarian nor too permissive. Let's hear it for balance, you know?

Your Left-Handed Child: Making Things Easy for Left-handers in a Right-handed World :: I have one lefty amongst four righties in my family. And my lefty has always shown a strong preference for being left-handed--even as a baby she'd eat with her left hand, grab with her left hand, and turn pages with her left hand--working her way from the back to the front of every book. It's been a steep learning curve for me as I realize, little by little, that our world is overwhelmingly geared towards right-handers (test layouts, workbook layouts, kitchen gadgets, a computer mouse, etc.). This book has been helpful in giving me more ideas for how to make my girl's world seem less backwards. I will say--my favorite story in the book was about a left-handed musician who had a piano created especially for him--one that was a mirror-image of a regular piano. The high notes started at the left, which meant the pianist could play the melody line with his left hand versus his right hand--which made the whole thing 'click' with his brain. Isn't that crazy?!

Will It Waffle?: 53 Irresistible and Unexpected Recipes to Make in a Waffle Iron :: Who can resist a book with a title like that? Not me, apparently. I bookmarked about five or ten recipes to try on my very own waffle maker. I bought my waffle iron at Goodwill a couple of years ago (seriously, go to your local thrift store and I guarantee there will be at least two waffle makers there) (right beside the fondue pots, which I also happen to own, just so you know). I don't use it very often, seeing as it's a total unitasker. But this has inspired me. Did you know you can cook homemade hash browns in a waffle maker? OH YES YOU CAN. AND I FULLY PLAN TO.

Common Core Basics Core Subject Module Writing :: I grabbed this book and the other four books (social studies, reading, mathematics, science) in the series. As an educator, I do my best to keep up with what people are saying about Common Core. Granted, I've not seen one positive opinion but I'm sure there's one out there. Regardless, I feel it's my duty to figure out what Common Core is actually about--and do this outside of thoughts posted on the world wide web, see also, Facebook. I think what most people have a beef about is the curriculum used to teach Common Core. I've looked through all these books, which are the high school standards, and so far nothing has frightened me. Honestly, the standards look too low--my seventh-grade homeschooler could meet most of the learning requirements by the end of his eighth grade year.

And those books are just a few of the roughly two hundred we currently have home from the library. Remember--many of the books I read out loud to my kids end up being posted on my Facebook page--so "like" me over there if that's your thing!

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 5

2014-10-14T20:14:00.002-07:00

My youngest child is now eight. I remember when my oldest child was eight, and I couldn't believe how "grown up" he was as compared to his preschool years. Oh, parents of infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. THIS TOO SHALL PASS. The days are slow, but the years are fast -- how true that is.

So now that I've had three eight-year-olds in the house (not at the same time, my goodness), I know just a wee bit about them. And that's what I yak about in this podcast. Enjoy!

Age 8 Is A Big Year

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10 More At-Home Lunch Ideas Besides PB&J

2014-10-13T20:34:00.000-07:00

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici
FreeDigitalPhotos.net

You know the old saying, "There are two things that are certain in life--death and taxes?" Well, I hereby rewrite that quote to say, "There are THREE things that are certain in life--death, taxes, and MEALTIMES." Every day, three times a day, those doggone mealtimes show up whether I want them to or not.

Now don't get me wrong -- I like ~~surviving~~ eating, and cooking. What I don't like is the derailment of my day -- just when we all get in a groove, oh look -- it's time to plan food and fix food and eat food and clean up the food.

I was talking to my kids' pediatrician, and she said the best part of having an empty nest is that she could go home and eat CEREAL for dinner. YES. Now THAT is a good word from a doctor!

In the meantime, I have three kids (and myself) to cook for each midday meal during the week. I'm always looking for something quick that still resembles food. Oh, don't worry--I had my years where lunch was either mac-n-cheese or chicken nuggets, and we all turned out fine. But eventually, my kids matured and I could offer them a little more variety for meals. Hallelujah.

My main survival tips for lunchtimes are these:

cook only the main dish
serve raw veggies
serve fresh fruit
serve a small portion of cheese or Greek yogurt

And for those days when I have to resort to PB&J or lunchmeat sandwiches--I serve chips because CHIPS MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER. Lays lightly-salted ones, especially.

Last year, I posted the first of my ten lunch-time ideas. Here are ten more. Hopefully this gives you some help in an area we all need a personal chef more help in!

**10 More At-Home Lunch Ideas Besides PB&J**

1. Barbecued Meat Sandwiches
I love those days where I cook a beef roast, pork loin, or chicken drumsticks in the crockpot for dinner. And when I'm really on top of things, I cook twice as much and have enough meat for the next day's lunch. I put the leftover shredded meat in a saucepan with some water, and warm it up on the stove. (I find this is just as fast as using the microwave, plus the meat doesn't turn to rubber.) Then I drain the water off the meat and add a few squirts of my favorite barbecue sauce and heat until warm. Serve this over a slice of bread and voila--I've got a yummy, open-faced sandwich.

2. Fresh Pasta
Our grocery store (and likely yours, too) carries some really great fresh pasta. I find the ravioli I like in the same aisle as the deli meat and cheeses. The best thing about this fresh pasta is that it cooks in minutes--like four at the most--once the water is at a boil. I often buy the Buitoni brand, and as odd as it sounds, the butternut squash agnolotti (good ol' agnolotti!) is my fave. For whatever reason, having fresh pasta for lunch always feels like a special treat.

3. Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and Tomato Soup
Oh, sure, you could make grilled cheese sandwiches with just bread and cheese slices, that's fine. Or you could go OVER THE TOP and make the ULTIMATE GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH and think you've died and gone to heaven. On cold winter days, I like to serve this alongside tomato soup-- from a can, of course, because not everything can be fancy-schmancy.

4. Smoked Sausage Sandwiches
My mom used to make this aaalllll the time for our family. I take one package of smoked turkey sausage and cut it into four segments. I then "butterfly" each segment so I have a flat, inner side to fry--plus this makes the meat easier to eat in a sandwich. Cook in a skillet with a little water until warmed and slightly browned on each side. Serve with mustard and say hello to 1987!

5. Grilled Chicken Caesar Salad
I love my grilled chicken recipe. What I do is buy a bag of frozen chicken breasts, and add the marinade shtuff right to the bag once I get home from the store. As the chicken thaws (in the fridge, of course), it marinates and is ready to grill in a couple of days. If I've planned ahead, I will grill enough chicken for two meals--meat and veggies for dinner at night and sliced breast over salad the next day. I have finally waved the white flag and buy mostly bagged salad kits now. The Caesar kits make this a quick and easy lunch to put together!

6. Breakfast Burritos
There's usually about one day a week I lose track of the morning and then suddenly it's HOLY COW WE HAVE TWENTY MINUTES TO FIX AND EAT LUNCH AND GET OUT THE DOOR. The kids know this inevitably means eggs are on the menu. I get a whole bunch scrambled and cooking in a skillet, and then maybe toss some ham and cheese on top of that. Once cooked, I dole out the eggs in a long line of flour tortillas and BAM!! Lunch is served.

7. Tortilla Club
I'm telling you--soft tortillas are great to keep on hand. I buy the plain, smaller ones that come in a pack of thirty or so. We tend to get tired of lunchmeat sandwiches, as that's what I pack whenever we're out and about during lunchtime. But I've found that if I layer similar ingredients (condiments, meat, cheese, and thinly sliced red peppers) in a tortilla and wrap it up--lunch feels whimsical and exciting again. Who knew we were so easy to please?

8. Hot Dogs
Oh don't you judge! I try to buy hot dogs that have the fewest and most-recognizable ingredients, does that make it better?! There's something to be said for having lunch on the table in less than ten minutes--and that's what this meal is to me. I use either my George Foreman grill or cook the hotdogs in a skillet on the stove. Sometimes I pair this with a can of baked beans because I am FAINCY like that.

9. Greek Yogurt Pancakes
I found The Pioneer Woman's Sour Cream Pancake recipe a year or so ago, and loved it. However, I make one big-ol' change: I use plain Greek yogurt in place of the sour cream. First of all, my lactose-intolerant child can digest the yogurt. Secondly, the plain Greek yogurt has a lot more protein than sour cream or regular yogurt. It's important to me, especially when serving up pancakes, that I don't send my kids into a carb-coma after lunch. I usually pair these pancakes with scrambled eggs to make sure we're fueled up for the afternoon. To serve the four of us, I have to double the pancake recipe as shown on Ree's site. I keep a big tub of plain Chobani yogurt in the fridge just for this.

10. Pepper Steak Sandwiches
Think of this like a quick-and-easy Philly Steak Sandwich. The original recipe is a good one, but I usually just slop a little Italian dressing in a skillet and cook the deli roast beef in that. I then top with some mozzarella I've (hopefully) got hiding in the back of my freezer. On a good day, I'd sauté a pepper or onion as well, but let's not get carried away.

And there you have it. Ten more ideas for meals you can make for lunch at home. Let me know what ideas you can add!

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 4

2014-10-07T15:50:00.001-07:00

One of the best tips I have about handwriting is that it's more like art and less like a language art. And like any artistic skill, some kids have a more natural bent towards drawing the letters just like they're supposed to be drawn, and others need more practice to get the "pictures" copied correctly. Having watched the progression of three kids over the course of eight years, I have lots more thoughts about handwriting--all contained in this week's episode of my podcast. Enjoy!

Handwriting Matters

PS: The two resources I've used and found success with are Letters and Numbers for Me (which teaches printing) and Cursive Handwriting, from the same publisher.

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 3

2014-09-30T20:31:00.001-07:00

Math has always been one of my favorite subjects. You too, right?! Okay, I really am being serious. It's so satisfying, what with its "one answer" that works out so neatly in the end. I often look at my kids' math assignments and think, "Wow, I wouldn't mind doing that page myself." I know. I should really get that part of me checked out.

Even though math is a strong subject for me, I'm still learning the ins and outs of teaching it to others. Here's my main math tip which applies especially to the grade school years, but greatly affects the middle school years (and beyond). Enjoy!

Math Facts Matter

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What Curriculum I'm Using - Middle School

2014-09-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

Each spring, I get all restless and ready to be d-o-n-e with the current school year, and excited about the next one. And because I love to research and plan, I spend a solid two months with a spiral notebook and the internet--combing and sorting it all out. I then take bits and pieces of the summer getting each child's subjects sorted into 36 weeks worth of work. Not everyone does it this way, but it works for me.

We are now a few weeks into the 2014-15 school year, so I thought it was time to ~~bore~~ inform you of what curriculum I'm using for my middle schoolers. I'll blog about my grade schooler next, because I know my audience, and I know what my audience wants: LONG, DETAILED POSTS FOR THE WIN!!!!!

It's time to get things started...

Math

I made a big change this year for my seventh grader -- I switched him from Math-U-See over to Saxon. I have always loved Math-U-See (and continue to use it with my sixth grader and third grader), but I felt my comp-sci sort of boy needed the extra "oomph" that Saxon could provide. He's about twenty lessons in to the book, and so far, so good. I also purchased the DVD lessons, which include the visualization of every single problem in the book. Clearly we don't need to see every problem, but when we do need help, it's nice to have this available.

Critical Thinking

My seventh-grader is getting a break from critical thinking this year. During his eight years of official schooling, he's already completed four labor-intensive workbooks on this topic (one, two, three, and four). I did buy a logic and reasoning book for this school year, but I soon realized it was high school level and would work better with group discussion, i.e., when his brother is older as well. I do have my sixth-grader working his way through the Building Thinking Skills - Verbal book, which has great word-centric exercises for the brain. Man, I love this subject because I am so! stinkin'! logical!

History

I'm so happy we've cycled back to American History this year. It always feels so much simpler and more interesting to me, but hey, maybe that's the ethnocentric side of me talking. Over the years, I've found that buying one main history book (our "spine") and borrowing stacks of supplementary library books makes for a good homemade curriculum. I'm really pleased with this year's spine: Children's Encyclopedia of American History. It's straightforward, readable, and it splits the span of history into manageable chunks. You have no idea how much time I spend trying to find a resource that makes sense to me! (And this one does!)

Geography

Usually, I piece together my geography curriculum from internet freebies and library books. But this year I wanted my middle schoolers to have something a little deeper -- so I got them each a copy of Discovering the World of Geography. This workbook combines a quality overview of map terms along with an overview of American History. I really appreciate the exercises that connect events of the past to places the kids have to find on a map.

Language Arts

This is my fifth year using Easy Grammar and Daily Grams for all three of my kids. Oh sure, the books are a bit repetitive and boring, but boy are they effective. And I am determined, LO UNSHAKABLY RESOLVED, that we will never again misuse the forms of "lay/lie" or "sit/set."

Both of my middle schoolers are completing two Vocabulary From Classical Roots books this year. I have them do the fill-in-the-blank and multiple-choice exercises, but I also make them write unique sentences for each word in the lesson. In addition, I use this as a way for them to practice their handwriting--both manuscript and cursive. Books A-E are the ones I've picked for the middle school years, and I'm telling you, I find myself wrestling with the words myself!

My seventh-grader is 'done' with spelling--this I decreed. And my sixth-grader and I are half-heartedly working our way through another level of Sequential Spelling. My boys are both naturally good spellers, so this subject has always been a fluff one for us anyway.

Writing

For the past two years, both of my boys have worked their way through the beginning level of Institute for Excellence in Writing (IEW). This curriculum has always been good, but it was definitely overwhelming at first. I finally had a little talk with myself about expecting adult-level, skillfully crafted paragraphs with every child's assignment. (What?! Me? A PERFECTIONIST?!) That alone has made this year's writing assignments much easier on everyone. Since we're studying American History, I chose the course that supports that topic and helps reinforce the stories of history. Starting in the middle school years, I decided to put a heavy emphasis on writing, and IEW has been the right tool for us.

Science

Do you have any idea what you learned during middle school science? For me? 206 bones in the body--there's one thing. How babies are made--that's another. Other than that--I GOT NUTHIN'. Now grade school science with my kids was so easy--we simply read books on all sorts of topics and did the dorky experiments. (Colored celery, anyone?) As for high school science -- okay, that's chemistry and biology and physics and schtuff like that. But what goes on in between?! I have no answers, but I did settle on what to do with both my sixth- and seventh-grader this year. I picked another quality spine (again, it took me hooooooouuuuurrrrrrrrs to search out and select a text I liked) called Science: The Definitive Visual Guide. The reading level is definitely for 6th-8th graders, but the pages aren't so crammed and "busy" as to make the book painful to read. (I have a real pet peeve against books that assault my eyes.) What I love about this book is that it takes a historical look at science, covering all kinds of interesting topics from the dawn of science to the information age. I give my boys simple assignments with each reading, but that's a topic for another post!

Read-Alouds

This is one part of our school day that I love the most. We take about 30-60 minutes and I read a mix of historical non-fiction, historical fiction, poetry, or simply great fiction that is appropriate for my audience. I won't put a full list of what I plan to read aloud here--it's a huge list and I'm always tweaking it based on what's available at the library and what actually ends up working as a read-aloud. I imagine I'll put any favorites in my bloggy book lists or talk about it on Facebook.

Foreign Language

Over the years, we've tried learning the Spanish language using multiple methods--all with varying degrees of failure. I imagine we'll revisit Spanish during the high school years when it can actually 'count' for something. Meanwhile, I asked my twelve-year-old what language he wanted to learn and he said, "Latin." Of course. My speciality. "My specialty" meaning, "my speciality is knowing nothing about Latin." He is working his way through First Form Latin while I struggle along with him. His brother, the sixth grader, is taking a year off from learning a second language, mostly because *I* have only enough brain power for one second language at a time.

Music

I continue to be the piano teacher for all three of my kids. Now listen. This is not my favorite thing in the world, as I feel they're not being challenged enough by me. They get an official lesson in about every other week (if we're lucky). I mean, we are making progress and it's not horrible. But I still can't stomach paying another person $100 - $150 a week for private lessons when I can do them myself. Ugh, how does anyone manage this?!

On the instrumental side, both boys are participating in our local school's band program. One plays the alto sax and the other plays the clarinet. This makes for a busy week (with someone having band every day the school doors are open), but my kids enjoy being at a "real" school and seeing the same kids day after day. They also have a great teacher and a well-supported music program, which is refreshing to be a part of.

Art

For the second year in a row, I picked twelve projects from Discovering Great Artists and we'll do them as time permits. We did complete all twelve projects last year, but there was a looooot of cramming there towards the end.

Well, here ends the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational post I've ever written. Comments and questions are welcome from any of you grumptastic men (or women) sitting in the stage left balcony box!

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 2

2014-09-23T20:22:00.004-07:00

This is one of those things that took me about seven years to learn. Somehow I had in my mind that every homeschooling family sat around and peacefully did school at one table and it was bliss with a side dish of bliss. Here's hoping this week's tip frees someone else from a rather unrealistic expectation. And if you happen to have kids who can sit at the same table and work productively---I do NOT need to hear about it.

Sincerely,

My Sanity

Two Or More Kids Working Happily At One Table Is A MYTH

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We Googled It: The September 20, 2014 Edition

2014-09-20T00:30:00.000-07:00

I've come to the conclusion that Google tells us all sorts of things we'd like to know, and even more things we could've gone a lifetime knowing nothing about. So yaaaaay, Digital Age! Here's what we've looked up over the past several weeks.

How do you say 'Volkswagen' in German? We were reading about good ol' Brother Andrew, and once we got to the part about his Volkswagen, we suddenly had to know how to pronounce it in German. LIKE HAD TO KNOW AND HAD TO KNOW NOW. And forever more I will say it like the good German that I am. FOLKS-VAHGGIN.

What does Seurat's pointillism look like up-close? This came out of an art exercise about pointillism, where we were painting dots of one color right on top of (dried) dots of another color. Let's just say our dots did not look nearly as good as Seurat's. In other news, I still haven't taken my kids to the Art Institute of Chicago to see Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte, so bucket list schmucket list.

Does a leopard's roar sound like a cough? In drafting a report about leopards, my ten-year-old and I came across this factoid. And so we had to youtube it to be sure.

How did the Jivaros Indians shrink heads? I know. I KNOW. I can't believe I looked this up, read about it, and then SEARCHED GOOGLE FOR IMAGES. It all came about while reading the story of Jim Elliot, a missionary to Ecuador. That book casually mentioned a neighboring tribe, the Jivaros, who would shrink the heads of their (decapitated, duh) enemies and then wear these heads around their bodies. So I had to know. I JUST HAD TO KNOW HOW IT WAS DONE. In the process, I managed to gross all of us out. I mean, seriously. THIS STUFF REALLY HAPPENED.

What is the difference between a nation and a country? I was asked this while driving. On the interstate. In the dark. Yes. I often wonder if my kids sit around and think of impossible questions for me to answer--just to throw me off. No surprise, I had to come home and look this up and explain it while not behind the wheel. Is this something you could define right off-hand? If so, YOU ARE A BETTER PERSON THAN ME.

What happens when a person is struck by lightning? Here again I give you Exhibit A of what it's like to live with kids. They wanna know! They wanna see PICTURES! (don't worry, we skipped that part) So two of my kids (the boys) were endlessly entertained by Humans As Lightning Rods, and the third (the girl) is now convinced we're all going down in Flames of Death by Lightning. Isn't learning something new FANTASTIC?!

How does a drawing salve work? My ten-year-old got a big 'ol splinter in his hand, and after much screeching and howling we collectively decided to put the tweezers back where the sun don't shine. So off I went to google this problem, and VOILA, who knew there a thing called "drawing salve?" It's apparently used to draw out (HENCE THE NAME) all kinds of negative things from the skin. Did it work for us, you ask?! Well, it took a week for the splinter to come out, which is about how long it would have taken on its own. Harumph.

Can you kill a Webkinz pet? The only explanation I have for this is "tweenage boys." And I was surprising entertained by the answer myself. Oh, we are in a special category, people. SPECIAL CATEGORY.

How do traffic lights work? We spend a lot of time tootling around the city, sitting at traffic lights. Hence this question. My tween says he used to think that actual people watched the traffic at each intersection, and flipped a switch to make the lights turn. Sounds good to me. The more I think about the sheer magnitude of what it takes to program and run the lights of a city, the more impressed I get. This video is great for understanding ("understanding") the actual mechanics of a traffic light. And this link now has me looking for loops in the roadways. Who knew?

What tune is the Star Spangled Banner based on? While making my kids memorize the lyrics to our national anthem, we discovered it's based off a British song entitled "The Anacreontic Song." And the poem it is based on was written exactly 200 years ago, so voila! More trivia to cheer to make us stand up and salute!

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8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 1

2014-09-16T21:09:00.000-07:00

I mentioned in my previous post that this fall begins my ninth year of homeschooling. I decided that made me ~~a know-it-all~~ someone who might have a tip or two to share with those who are just starting out. Though it's been several years since my newbie days, I still remember how overwhelming it was figuring out the whats and whys and hows of schooling at home. That prompted me to make a list of what I've learned -- not a comprehensive list (you're welcome), but a quick, in-no-particular-order, list. And to make it more interesting, I decided to put all this great wisdom and knowledge (INSERT SARCASM) in audible form, i.e., a podcast. Well, a podcast of sorts. It's a recording of my voice. Eight recordings, actually. And each one is about three to five minutes long.

I'll publish a new one each week... about midweek. Sound good? (SOUND good?! Ha ha, so punny!) Here's episode one!

Operating Like A One-Room Schoolhouse Is Key

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First Week Of School Pictures

2014-09-10T19:23:00.000-07:00

Right after Labor Day, we officially started our new school year. This is my *ninth* year of homeschooling, which shocks me because it feels like my ~~ninetieth~~ fifth. Where has all the time gone?! I still have fond memories of cozying on the couch with my preschoolers and reading the day away. Granted, I've forgotten how wiggly and busy and LOUD they were at that age, but still. The memories are primarily good.

Here's a group shot of my kids on the first school day I made them all shower and wear nice shorts and non-graphic tees. Ahhh, they do clean up well.

My oldest, nearly 13, is starting seventh grade this year. I'm guessing he's grown at least four inches since the last time I looked his direction. He continues to be my Man On A Mission, working hard to get his school done so he can goof off or work at the computer. Every day I'm thankful he finally gets the concept of working independently and efficiently. He's naturally wired this way, and he's older, but whooooo-eeey! There were several years there where every assignment began and ended with the Gnashing Of Teeth. Speaking of teeth, doesn't he have a nice smile?

My ten-year-old is in both fifth and sixth grades this year. I know. THOSE CRAZY HOMESCHOOLERS. I mean, it's all so subjective anyway. Since the get-go, he's been doing several subjects with his older brother, and it just made sense to make their grade levels a little closer. So he will be doing a little catch-up (just in math) this year, and by next year he'll be just one grade ahead of his peers and one grade behind his brother. Doubt that makes sense, but anyway, this boy is my Lover Of All Things Natural And Snuggly:

And then there's the Sparkly One. My third child exuuuuuuuudes verbal and physical energy the entire livelong day. All day. The whole day. "Pick a little, talk a little, pick a little, talk a little, cheep cheep cheep, talk a lot, pick a little more..." I tell myself that I have just as many thoughts as she has -- I just happen to keep them inside my head. Every day is a little bit of Extrovert Meets Introvert, and WHOZA GONNA WIN. Her favorite subject is music and she could spend all day singing (if we'd let her). Introducing, the third grader:

And then there's me, the forty-year-old Ma'am-Sir. Not much to say, because really, this blog is essentially THE SOUND OF ME TALKING.

But I can't forget to introduce you to our cat, who's truly yet another member in our classroom. I have thought many times how much fun it is to have a pet around while doing school at home. There's just something soothing about a soft, ridiculous ball of fur who is undoubtedly part of our family.

And with that, we're off to a good start to our ninth (seventh) (fifth) year of homeschool. Let the games begin!

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What I Learned By Doing My Forty Before Forty List

2014-09-05T16:16:00.005-07:00

Just when you thought I was done talking about that blasted forty before forty list, I hit you with another stinkin' blog post! Bwah ha ha, suckers!!!

Okay. That's enough of that. Now on to the business at hand!

I created my list of forty (or so) things right around my 39th birthday, not knowing if I'd be able to complete the items or not. I specifically filled the list with things I truly wanted to do, and thought could be done in a year. I looked at a lot of other people's lists before making my own, and I saw a lot of BIG ITEMS and HUGE DREAMS but rarely were all the things accomplished in a year. I didn't want that to happen to me--I'm a "finishing" sort of person versus a "dream the big dreams" and "go skydiving" and "use clichéd slogans" type of gal.

As I talked to my real-world peeps about the things on my list, inevitably they'd chime in with things they'd put on their own lists, or things they'd take off of mine. Some days I'd look at my list and curse the dumb thing, seeing it as a silly reflection of my own, small life. But on my better days, especially as the year went on--I began to see the list as a perfect reflection of ME.

The hard thing about staying at home with my kids is that with each passing year, I lose a little bit more of myself. Oh sure, I have gained so much and would choose this way again--but some days I just want to BE ME and to KNOW ME. I eventually realized my list was made of forty things that celebrated ME, and I was CONTENT with each one. Hello, age forty, you are kind.

Because organization is what I do in my spare time, I soon noticed that my list was made up of four main categories:

There were fun things that connected me with my past, like playing Pac-Man, getting a ping-pong table, going putt-putt, accompanying, and square dancing.

There were events that attached me to the present, like watching hot air balloons, seeing Mt. St. Helens, going on a bike ride, playing board games, picnicking at the ocean, and hiking in the gorge.

There were steps that propelled me towards the future, like recording a video, test-driving a car, figuring out my enneagram, planting a tree, and growing strawberries.

And then there were items done simply to relax, to take it easy and celebrate forty years on this globe. Things like getting a pedicure, retreating to the coast, reading an old classic, eating ice cream, and watching The Hobbit.

Several have asked me if I'm going to do a "forty-one before forty-one" list, and the answer to that is, HECK NO. While I enjoyed this past year, I won't miss having a list of forty things nagging at me to get. them. done.

HOWEVER. It's amazing how motivating it was to publish a list of specific, measurable goals knowing that The Great Webiverse was holding me accountable. I got things done! Forty things! So I'll definitely be considering what this means for my personal growth and blogging topics for the future.

Anyway. Thanks for following along with me during my fortieth year. It was a good one!

**PS: The picture is of me, standing on Mount Hood, right before my fortieth birthday. And YES, I did something FUN that was NOT on my list. Will wonders never cease?!

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In Which I Find A New Way To Bore You To Tears

2014-08-21T21:14:00.000-07:00

I've never done a video of myself. A video of just myself. Merely me, myself, and I talking to the screen. But I realized that there were units, lo, tens of you who've read my blog but have never heard my voice. Surely that needed to be fixed.

Now listen. I am not a talkative person by nature, and truly loathe a long monologue. It took me weeks to come up with anything to say that I thought you good people might want to hear. And then when I finally got some notes scratched on paper, I had to work up the nerve to take on... The Cam-e-ra.

I started off using a webcam and ended up staring at my face for an hour. Not kidding. An hour. Oh, I'd practice talking to myself, but every time I made a dorky facial expression, I'd react to the dorky facial expression and get derailed and my goodness I could not press that "record" button. After much fussing and putzing around, I ended up recording on my phone with the screen not faced my way. Ahhhh, relief.

And then I thought to myself, goodness, if *I* can't stand to look at Yours Truly, then how are my blessed readers going to manage it? More power to ya, my friends.

My ten-year-old watched the draft of the video and was all taken aback at "Professional Marm." I guess they know me in only one capacity--as the MA'AM-SIR. Huh. I wanted to be lighthearted and charming on the video, but hey. Consider the source. Plus, it's awfully hard to be funny when you're sequestered in your room talking to a phone that's sitting atop a pile of books. A stand-up comedienne I am not.

---ALL THAT TO SAY---

I wanted to do a video for several reasons. One, so you could hear my voice. Two, to prove to myself that I could do it (see: forty before forty list). Three, to add a little variety to my blog. And four, to complete a project with my techie tween. He did all of the editing of this video in Adobe Premiere Pro and I was pretty amazed at his abilities with that software. Kids these days. Wow.

Okay, so here it is. I wanted it to be about one minute long, so as to not waste your precious time. I see that maybe I am a little bit talkative when given the floor. Hopefully you enjoy whatever small portion you choose to watch, or just enjoy skipping the whole thing. See? Such freedom.

PS: Don't overanalyze my choice of words. I was not speaking from a script, as I wanted it to feel more like "natural conversation" and less like "teleprompter." So... any attempts I made at humor sound more like obnoxiousness and isn't that just wonderful. So yes. This is my voice.

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Cello? Is It You I'm Looking For?

2014-08-17T12:12:00.000-07:00

There was a brief period in my life where I was an adult who had free time and disposable income and you know what I chose to do with it? I bought a cello. And I took lessons for a year or two, up until I had my first baby and subsequently had zero free time and what free time I did have (naptime) was certainly not spent squawking away on some strings.

I held on to my cello for a while after that, but then came the toddler stage and my instrument feared for its life. I eventually sold my beloved buddy (the cello, not the child) and moved fully into Motherhood. I did not regret selling my cello as we ended up moving four times in about the same number of years and cellos do not travel well.

But then we settled into a house, and my kids got past the "whirling dervish" stage, and I actually had five minutes a day to think about me. And I would think about ye olde cello days and how good it would be for the kids to have a string instrument in the house. Always for the kids, you know.

I put "buy a cello" on my forty before forty list, and then spent an entire year mulling it over and looking at prices and never really got around to DOING THE DEED. Fortunately, my husband knows my frugalness too well, and determined I needed a cello for my birthday present. I couldn't argue with that, you know. He let me pick it out, because he also knows how fussy and particular I am and already had in mind what I'd get.

So here I am, with my new best friend:

It took a few days for the cobwebs to clear away in order for me to recall what I'd learned over thirteen years ago in lessons. But it's all coming back to me and I am back to playing what is simply the loveliest string instrument there is. I'm not saying my playing is lovely, but I figure after 10,000 hours (roughly 54 years if I practice a half-hour a day) I'll be an expert. So if I'm still blogging when I'm 94, I'll post a video worth posting.

Meanwhile, if you want to hear some fantastic cello playing, here's my favorite piece from The Piano Guys, and my favorite performance from Yo-Yo Ma. Enjoy!

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I Turned Forty

2014-08-15T10:43:00.000-07:00

I made it to age forty, yes ma'am I did. And the question all inquiring minds (two) have asked is, BUT DID YOU FINISH YOUR LIST?!?!?!

The answer to that is...

YES.

And I did it before my fortieth birthday, because I'm a bit uptight about deadlines and commitments (even made-up ones) and therefore IT IS FINISHED. I've had company in town for the past couple of weeks, so I'm a bit behind in updating the blog, but never fear. I'll give you the nitty-gritty of the last few items I completed on my "forty before forty" list.

Meanwhile, here I am on my birthday:

I did share that enormous piece of cake, in case you were also wondering that. Happy fortieth to me!!

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Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The July 26, 2014 Edition

2014-07-26T11:06:00.001-07:00

Here's what I'm doing this summer (besides finishing my "forty before forty" list). Reading! And reading!

Portland Food Cart Stories: Behind the Scenes With the City's Culinary Entrepreneurs :: Nothing says "Portland" like "food carts." And coffee. And rain. Oh, and books. But back to the food carts. I LURVE me some food from a cart, and time after time I'm impressed with the amazing cuisine that comes from a tiny little kitchen parked by the street. Since I have a full-time job making zero-thousand dollars, I have to live vicariously through the author of this book. He regularly visits, samples, and writes about the food carts of Portland--now how cool is that?

College Without High School: A Teenager's Guide to Skipping High School and Going to College :: This. This is the type of book I love. It takes all my preconceived notions about high school and college and SWEEPS THEM ASIDE. It excites me to think about teenagers taking charge of their futures earlier rather than later in the educational process. I already plan to re-read this another time or two when my kids start "high school" (at home).

The Education of Millionaires: Everything You Won't Learn in College About How to Be Successful :: Okay, so I'm on a bit of a theme these days. It took me days, lo, about two weeks, to read this book because it had that much gold to mine out of it. (Usually I can skim a typical book in a couple of hours.) You guys know how I'm all about learning that is practical and relevant, and how academic navel-gazing makes me cray-cray. Well, this guy gives one example after another of people who made their own path to success--outside of higher education. He's convinced (and I am, too) that that the higher education bubble is about to pop, and getting a Bachelors will not automatically equate to getting a job. I feel this book is a must-read for parents raising the next generation of workers.

Glitter and Glue: A Memoir :: I'm not sure who recommended this book to me but WOW. I read it in one sitting, stopping every now and again to pat dry a tear. Oh, it's not a tearjerker--it's quite heartwarming and insightful and perfectly captures what it's like to have a mother. I always marvel when an author can write with such eloquence, and capture details from yeeeears ago as if they just happened today. I read this book not only as a daughter, but as a mother with a rather complex relationship with her own daughter. As someone who is consistently trying to figure out who *I* am apart from the whole wife-mom thing, I truly appreciated this memoir.

Congratulations, by the way: Some Thoughts on Kindness :: This is a short graduation speech put into book format, but you know what? Sometime a person can say more in a short speech than in twenty long-winded chapters. That is the case with this book. The one bit of wisdom contained in sixty short pages is solid. And if each person took the words in his speech to heart, wow, what a better world we would live in.

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May The Books Be Ever In My Favor

2014-07-21T12:03:00.000-07:00

It's not hard for me to sit down and read. I make it through a ton of books--most of them non-fiction. I like to skim and pick and delve and discuss and meditate on every little bit I'm LEARNING. My ISTJ-ness looooves an ever-increasing pot of KNOWLEDGE. But when it comes to fiction, I always feel a bit guilty, as if reading for pleasure somehow doesn't count as "getting something done." Now don't misunderstand, I love an excellent novel and it's fiction I turn to when I want to relax. However, that relaxing is often so successful that I end up asleep with a book propped up on my chest.

Regardless. I love that feeling (gah! feelings!) of fully immersing myself in someone else's story. It's one of the few things that can "unhinge" me from my busy, anxious mind. So I put it on my list and made it a priority to read fiction. In The Daytime. Scandalous--amirite?

I read Pride and Prejudice first, thus giving me bonus points for tackling a classic. But then I needed to up my "coolness score," so Hunger Games it was. Gotta keep up with the times, you know. Besides, I wanted to preview the trilogy to see if it was appropriate for my tweens. So yes, I was doing something frivolous but I was also DOING SOMETHING PRACTICAL. So take that, re-lax-a-thon!!!

I read all three books in about two weeks. I was shocked at how much The Hunger Games and Catching Fire matched up with their movies (one and two). It almost felt like the books were written after the movies. I enjoyed the books, but it wasn't a case of OH MY WORD THE BOOKS ARE BETTER THAN THE MOVIES, OH YES THEY ARE.

Mockingjay ended up being my favorite, probably because I didn't know the plot in advance. Page after quick-turning page I wanted to know how it all worked out for dear Katniss. I mean Gale! Peeta! WHICH ONE DID SHE CHOOSE?!?!? Of course by now I know the ending, which means I get to spend the next eighteen gazillions months KEEPING IT TO MYSELF to avoid spoiling it for my husband.

The third book is being made into two movies, because the entertainment industry wants to see me go mad. Maybe President Snow is behind it all, who knows. But from now until six months after November 2015 (as we'll wait for the DVD, of course) I'll be playing my own little game of Let's Not Blurt Out The Ending. Who knows if I'll succeed, but may the odds be ever in my favor.

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Veni, Vidi, Volcano

2014-07-18T09:46:00.000-07:00

You know how you can live just a couple of hours from something but never go see it? Well that's how it's been between me and St. Helen. I mean, I see her* a lot from my van, when I'm out driving around. There she sits just north of me, all flat-topped and snow-capped.

After seven years of living in the Pacific Northwest, I decided it was time to see the old girl up close. Now, you would think it would be easy to make a two-hour road trip straight north and east of where I live. HOWEVER. One does not simply go to Mt. St. Helens on a cloudy or gray day, as there'd be nothing to see. And in case you've not heard about the Pacific Northwest, it KNOWS how to be CLOUDY and GRAY. So for months I have watched the weather forecast, looking for a completely clear day where all five of us could head out.

That day came this week. This is the view about an hour or so from home (at Elk Rock Viewpoint):

NOT A CLOUD IN THE SKY, PEOPLE.

We stopped by Coldwater Lake, a lake formed about thirty-four years ago when the eruption of Mt. St. Helens clogged up a creek. There's a nice little walk around the lake, with views of the mountain here and there:

That area is teeming with old burned-up gray stumps, which you can see dotting the hill behind my tween:

But there is new life sprouting everywhere as well, like these awesome bell-shaped wildflowers, which undoubtedly have a name:

Ahhh.... so serene:

We drove on, up and around, and finally reached the Johnston Ridge Observatory to see this:

Huh. That crater is HUGE, and I mean, ONE MILE ACROSS huge. It was fantastic to see. We decided it looks like some giant took an enormous bite out of his colossal ice cream cone. Not that I am always thinking about ice cream, of course.

Totally worth the two-hour drive. Especially on a clear day.

There's a visitor's center up at Johnston Ridge Observatory, complete with a couple of (old 1990s-style) films. It's worth the money through, but we actually preferred the visitor center we stopped by about halfway home. That place had a more informative video, and lots of educational displays that "scratched where it itched." But Johnston Ridge is where to go for the view. Wow.

I'm so glad I put this on my forty before forty list and made it happen. Veni, vidi, volcano: I came, I saw, I ERUPTED! (with delight!)

*Historical note: Mt. St. Helens was named after Lord St. Helens, a man. However, the mountain always feels like a woman to me, what with her blowing her top and all that.

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We Climbed Beacon Rock

2014-07-12T15:01:00.002-07:00

I don't like to get out much, and neither do my two of my (three) kids. There's just something so comforting about reading, staring at a screen, standing in the backyard, wash, rinse, and repeat. I have a pretty low tolerance for risk. Oh sure, I can think up all sorts of fun outings to do, but then my overactive brain follows it up with: "That would be fun, as long as we don't _____," with that blank being filled with "drown, fall to our deaths, get bitten by a snake, lose a bunch of sleep, get a raging sunburn, or have to deal with hordes of humanity." See? "Adventure" might not be my middle name.

But alas. I try hard to do things here and there that are outside my comfort zone. Test-driving a car, for instance. Taking a day trip with just me and the kids, for another example. I added that to my list, and I spent hours scouring out a place that was at least an hour from home. Fortunately, Portland is a gold mine for this sort of thing--within one to two hours in any direction is a full list of outdoorsy things to do.

I had a hike to a waterfall all picked out, to a place called "Butte Creek Falls," of all things. I even had my jokes all lined up for the walk. However, during the same week of our planned trip--a man drowned in those falls. Now maybe those with a stronger mental state could've gotten past that, but not me. No way, no how. That whole hike would have been a class entitled "Fending Off A Panic Attack, 101."

So back to the drawing board I went. I ended up picking a hike in the Columbia Gorge, on the Washington side of the river. Beacon Rock is this huge 800' monolith just waiting to be climbed. The hike description seemed challenging enough, and the weather forecast was 90-something degrees, so off we went on an adventure!

But before I bore you with pictures, I need to mention that Beacon Rock was named by Lewis and Clark themselves during their 1805 Voyage of Discovery to the West. And you know how I love me some Lewis and Clark.

This first picture shows what Beacon Rock looks like from a distance. I couldn't get a shot like this myself, seeing as I was DRIVING A VEHICLE when I might have gotten the shot. So here's the Wikipedia image, in all its blandness:

As you can see, it's a big rock, HENCE THE NAME. Long ago someone built a whole trail system up the side and now people climb to the top BECAUSE THEY CAN. AND WE DID. Here are my pictures showing proof.

At the start of the trail:

The view from about halfway up:

I told my kids we needed to stop about every five minutes to "take in the beauty." What they didn't know is that their Old Marm needed to catch her breath.

Mostly because of this:

Fifty-one switchbacks on that trail, people. And it was hot. Here's my daughter, at one "rest stop" along the way:

This is the view close to the top. Loved the "toy train" down on the ground. (I called it a "toy train" to my poor gullible child and she still wants to know who sets it up and starts it each day. Bless her heart.)

Some kind man (who was older than me) (and in better shape than me) (and who beat us to the top) got a shot of all four of us:

And here's my middle child, who never complained or ran out of breath, my goodness, I miss my youth:

I tried not to think about heights on the way up or down the rock. But I think this picture does a good job of showing what the trail looked like:

And here's my smiley boy who likely could've jogged up the rock if it weren't for his Marm slowing him down. He was happy to get outside for the day, as I promised him Subway sandwiches after the hike. Best way to a tween's heart...

Once we'd jellied our legs from that hike, I took the kids to the nearby day-use area of Beacon Rock State Park. It was just a wide-open grassy area by the Columbia River--and most importantly--DEVOID OF PEOPLE. It was so refreshing to see my kids frolic outdoors and make up games with carrot sticks and real sticks and when did my boys become bodies with sticks for arms and legs?!

No day trip is complete (in my mind) unless ice cream is involved. We stopped by a Dairy Queen for dipped cones, which was a staple from my own childhood. Here's my girl with a vanilla cone dipped in cherry shell stuff. It didn't taste that great to her but it was PINK and THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERED.

And that was our day trip where we left the state and took a hike. And it's with a great sense of satisfaction that every time I pass that spot in the future I can say to myself, "WE CLIMBED BEACON ROCK." Yes we did.

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I Went Whole-Hog Vegetarian For A Week

2014-07-09T09:56:00.000-07:00

I'm at a culinary place in life where most of my meat dishes end up as dry, bland, gristly, or inedible. In addition to that, I have a very active imagination which makes me think of Babe, Bessie, or Henrietta while I'm eating said meat. I'm that person who squashes any talk of "which animal does this come from" at the table. I like to keep it to safe topics, like how the kids should not even look at each other, let alone speak to one another. Happy mealtime memories, you see.

I also think the price of meat is out-RA-geous, and that's not even for the grass-fed, antibiotic-free, humanely-treated, individually-named, locally-raised animals. And while I'm on an optimistic roll (seriously, how do you guys put up with me?!), I'm not going to go all "Food Network" and undercook my meat to make it "tastier." I figure if I'm nearly forty and can't stomach raw or somewhat raw meats, this old dog ain't learnin' new tricks during the next forty years.

SO AS I WAS SAYING.

I've gradually been eating smaller and smaller portions of meat as I age. So it made sense during this "year of celebrating me" that I'd try a week of eating no meat. Why not, right?

I just finished that week and it was surprisingly a happy one. I thought for sure I'd be starving and lethargic by Day Two, but I felt no such thing. I personally happen to enjoy a big plate of sautéed veggies, a side salad, and some fruit. I also like beans of all shapes and sizes, and eggs. I really like eggs (as long as I don't think about them too much, ha ha, welcome to my world).

I also worked hard this week to make it more vegetarian than carb-etarian, i.e., gain-weight-etarian. A friend asked me if I was having a vegetarian week, or a vegan week--and it was clearly a vegetarian week. Who could possibly give up butter, cheese, eggs, and the like?! That's a dish of crazysauce right there.

Would I consider being mostly vegetarian in the future? I would. That's what I figured out about myself this week. For social and family reasons, it's not something I can do whole-hog right now. But in the future when I'm making meals for just one or two? Yeah, I could see that happening.

This TED talk just came across my desk, and I love it because of its short length, the speaker with great hair, and balanced message. It's worth a watch if you've considered cutting back on your meat intake as well!

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I Cured My Peds

2014-07-08T11:58:00.000-07:00

Hi, my name is Lisa and I've never had a pedicure. ("Hi Lisa.")

I guess the whole "pay a chunk of money for relaxation and/or beauty" simply doesn't fit with my streamlined, cheapskate self. To quote my ten-year-old boy, "Can't you just paint your nails at home for a buck?" The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, I suppose.

However. Since pedicures are a "thing" that most women like to do, I decided to get one myself. I went with a friend, which was a smart choice. It was nice to have someone to chat with and I didn't have to make small talk with a stranger who happened to be scraping and filing at my feet.

Did I enjoy myself? Overall, yes. The pedicure was relaxing and the finished result will give me little bits of happiness over the next couple of months. I picked a salon that got great reviews on yelp, and while it was fine, I doubt I'll go back. I went in expecting to pay $25 for a basic pedicure, and left paying $36 because of upsells and hidden fees and a little sign saying "we expect tips in cash." Remember my love for salesWOMEN? Yeah, that. Not a big fan. I don't like to feel guilted into getting all the extras and MY WORD THE STRESS and also I AM WEAK.

On a related note, I bought some black Teva wedge sandal / flip-flop things at the beginning of summer (at Fred Meyer, no less!) and aren't. they. darling?

I will say getting a pedicure was worth it, for the simple fact that the gal cleaned up my toes (the nails, the skin, whathaveyou) and the polish is not a sloppy mess which is usually what I crank out. And now that I know what all the fuss is about, I'd consider getting another pedicure (at another place) during the summer when my toes can actually be seen.

Well. Since you've seen actual photography of my feet now, I feel like this blog can go nowhere but up. But won't my toes look lovely while I'm finishing up my list? Yes. Yes they will.

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I Entered A Dealership And Drove A Car

2014-07-05T20:38:00.003-07:00

You know how most people fear public speaking? Wild boars? Large pits of lava? Well that's how much I fear salesmen. YES. SALESMEN. It has nothing to do with the actual person himself, and everything to do with being backed into a corner with a slick spiel and a "just sign here." SO YES. IT'S A CONTROL THING. AND I AM WEAK.

I put on my "Forty Before Forty" list to test drive something other than a Honda. I did this for two reasons: I already own two Hondas (which I adore) and I wanted to branch out to something ~~totally different~~ quite similar. (More on that later.) Secondly, I wanted to put on my Big Girl Pants and Face A Salesman--ALL BY MYSELF. I know, right? No husband or dad there to say, "Thanks, but not buying today, yada yada yada, goodbye."

You can tell by how long I waited to check this item off my list how much I dreaded it. I mean, dreaded it to the point I should have worn stronger deodorant, dreaded it. And you betchyer boots I waited for a day where my hair looked nice and I wasn't feeling particularly stabby. You know what I mean. A "good" day, with confidence on my side.

I entered the Toyota dealership on a holiday weekend, and I'm not kidding you, there had to have been twenty male salesmen all buzzing around that place. I'm not gonna lie--I made a beeline straight through the showroom and into the service area, just to give myself some time to adjust. "Ohhh, just here with my imaginary car getting an imaginary oil change... don't mind me," I thought to myself.

I finally got up the nerve to ask for a salesman and soon enough I was explaining to this man (bless his heart) the exact reason why I was there. I blurted out my age (always classy) and asked if I could test drive a car for the first time in my life. Soon enough I was buzzing around town in a 2014 tricked-out Camry Hybrid. I had that model picked out in advance, of course. A girl knows what she likes, and a Camry seemed just enough like my beloved Hondas, only fancier.

And how was the ride, you ask? Well. Besides having a co-pilot that felt oddly like driver's ed, it was nice. Quite nice. That Camry was a smooth, sweet ride. And in my wildest imaginations, I picture buying such a car when my old Honda gets passed down to the teen. FORTY-FIVE BEFORE FORTY-FIVE, PEOPLE! WRITIN' IT DOWN!

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I Lived Socially, Whatever That Means

2014-07-03T21:11:00.000-07:00

I've been combing the emails from Groupon and Living Social for a few months now. That's an adventure in itself. I had no idea how many things could be tweaked and tucked and treated, all for about 50% off. But I added to my list the goal of buying something on impulse--you know, something fun and frivolous and not available at my local Fred Meyer.

Wanna know what I bought? I doubt it. But here goes.

I bought a massage. This will be the second professional massage I've had in my forty years of life. I know, right? I'm worth it.

I'm going to report in advance how it went.

IT WENT GREAT. I LOVED IT. I WANT TO MAKE THE MASSEUSE MY NEIGHBOR AND GET A MASSAGE EVERY DAY.

I've already got my time booked for right near my birthday, so HAPPY FIFTY-FIVE MINUTES OF ~~SLIGHTLY AWKWARD~~ RE-LAX-A-TION to MEEEEEEEEE!!

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Stretch Mark Mama

Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The February 7, 2015 Edition

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 7

Homeschooling Is A Full-Time Job

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 6

Academics are Easy Compared to Character Development

Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The October 18, 2014 Edition

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 5

Age 8 Is A Big Year

10 More At-Home Lunch Ideas Besides PB&J

Last year, I posted the first of my ten lunch-time ideas. Here are ten more. Hopefully this gives you some help in an area we all need a personal chef more help in!

10 *More* At-Home Lunch Ideas Besides PB&J

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 4

Handwriting Matters

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 3

Math Facts Matter

What Curriculum I'm Using - Middle School

Math

Critical Thinking

History

Geography

Language Arts

Writing

Science

Read-Alouds

Foreign Language

Music

Art

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 2

Two Or More Kids Working Happily At One Table Is A MYTH

We Googled It: The September 20, 2014 Edition

8 In 8 - Eight Things I've Learned In Eight Years Of Homeschooling - Episode 1

Operating Like A One-Room Schoolhouse Is Key

First Week Of School Pictures

What I Learned By Doing My Forty Before Forty List

In Which I Find A New Way To Bore You To Tears

Cello? Is It You I'm Looking For?

I Turned Forty

Books I'm Hogging From The Library: The July 26, 2014 Edition

May The Books Be Ever In My Favor

Veni, Vidi, Volcano

We Climbed Beacon Rock

I Went Whole-Hog Vegetarian For A Week

I Cured My Peds

I Entered A Dealership And Drove A Car

I Lived Socially, Whatever That Means

**10 More At-Home Lunch Ideas Besides PB&J**