Square-Peg Reflections

Winston Churchill's Black Dog (plus a giveaway)

2013-05-14T09:53:12-04:00

Here's a little (5 minute) video in which I talk about Winston Churchill's black dog (depression) and some things I've learned about dealing with that damn dog.

Toward the end I tell you how to enter the drawing for a Square-Peg package giveaway (it's easy).

The giveaway contest ends 11:59 pm Eastern - Friday, May 17. Two names will be chosen - and the winner announced Saturday, May 18th.

Watch now!

Jessica and Lori, your names were picked from a hat (by my lovely li'l granddaughter, who's visiting this weekend). Yea Lori and Jessica! Thanks everyone who entered the contest!!

Interview with Alana Sheeren

2013-05-07T21:06:10-04:00

"Emotional Alchemist and Deep Conversation Catalyst"

I met Alana online and had been following her blog (enjoying her writing and her presence) when, almost 3 years ago, I read something she wrote and gasped.

Tears rolled down my face as I read that Alana's son Benjamin had been stillborn - and I gasped when I read that she was going to put her coaching blog on hold and share her grief journey with her readers. What open-ness, what vulnerability!

Alana shared her journey (and that of her family) in the blog Life After Benjamin. Later she wrote a beautiful guide Picking Up the Pieces: Thoughts on grief and growth and appeared at a TedX event (which I can almost guarantee will cause YOU to gasp due to Alana's connective onstage presence and her open-ness).

She has called herself a "grief alchemist" and speaks beautifully (I am using the word beautifully quite consciously here) - heart-openingly beautifully about grief and its transforming power!

And she still causes me to gasp! As Alana began answering the question "What is Your Favorite Square-Peg Trait?" my head was bopping up and down in agreement when she mentioned her ability to laugh. Then I literally gasped (I had to stop for a minute and take a breath) when Alana spoke her new favorite trait! Read on, you'll see.

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How Do You See Yourself as a Square-Peg?

You know, I think it's really common with people who are highly sensitive, or creative, or artistic - to feel an otherness growing up. I definitely felt like I didn't quite fit in for a lot of my life.

As a grown up I feel lucky to have built a community that really feels good - a couple communities actually, to satisfy different parts of my life.

I think that where I'm feeling really Square-Peggish right now is in my business. I'm trying to learn business skills so I can earn money, yet I'm overwhelmed by this desire to lead with my heart and soul.

So I'm feeling this: Hmmm - ok, so how do I take this information, this: "You have to do X, Y and Z to be a successful entrepreneur!", and really make it work for me?

It's scary sometimes to follow our own intuition and our own voice when everybody's saying: "Do it this way! Do it this way! Do it this way!" Especially when the results aren't immediately apparent.

So I don't know, I feel like there are a couple different ways I feel like a Square-Peg. As a human being - a lot of the time! Growing up I didn't quite feel like I fit in - and now, as an adult, making choices that make me feel good about me but don't always fit with what people want from me in my life.

I spent a lot of my life where my priority was figuring out what people wanted from me and giving it to them.

It's been a really big (but gradual) switch - and of course it's not completely over.

How Do You Maintain Your Square-Pegness (in a round-hole world)?

Hmmm, it takes a a lot of internal commitment and strength. To me it's really about taking the time to listen to myself and to get clear about where I'm getting pulled and where I'm initiating action.

I'm really learning to live in trust, like: "Ok, this feels important to me, this feels right to me. I don't know where this is taking me, but I'm going to take the step and as long as it feels good I'll continue to move in this direction."

But also giving myself permission to change my mind and turn left when I thought I was going right.

For me that practice started a long time ago. I remember a real clarity when I was going back to get my Masters in Clinical Psychology. I said: "I don't know if this is the right direction for me, but I'll continue to move in this direction as long as it feels good and right."

And that feeling took me through my masters degree - and then when it came time to get an intern number, and get my hours - to become a therapist, it was like: "I don't want to do this!

I just spent $30,000 on a degree - but at the same time it's not like it's wasted time - I've learned so much, I've changed so much, but I don't want to be a therapist!"

"Ok", I thought, "I was going to turn right here, but I'm going to turn left."

And of course it's all been perfect. Incredibly challenging, but perfect.

{I asked Alana when this took place}

I went back to school in 2005. I had been living in Los Angeles as an actor, met my husband and we got married in 2004. Then, 5 months into our marriage, it fell apart and we separated for awhile.

The process of rebuilding our marriage made me want to go back to school to become a therapist. It was life changing for me. As hard as it was I'm incredibly grateful for it - I also think it was preparation for what was to come!

Did Benjamin's stillbirth contribute to your Square-Peg feeling?

You know, it's actually very interesting that you asked that question - because it does. A couple things are coming to mind here:

One, having a stillbirth makes most people feel like they're different because it's still such a hidden loss. It's not talked about even though the statistics are staggering.

There's that feeling of walking around with a mark on your soul that makes you feel - that makes me feel different.

The other thing that's a part of that is that I'm now (even though I've had four pregnancies) the parent of an only child. That was never part of my self-concept!

For awhile I didn't know if I would have children, but when I decided to have children it was like: "Well, of course I'll have two or three."

So I think there's a certain Square-Pegness about choosing to have an only child. And though I feel like the universe made my choice for me, technically I could get pregnant again. But I'm choosing not to because my life was put in danger with Benjamin's still birth - and they don't know that it won't happen again.

I am choosing not to risk my life because I have one child and I want to be there for her.

So there is a sense of being a Square-Peg for me and for many people when they have a stillbirth.

When people say: "How many children do you have?" or "Is she an only child?" I have to stop and think about my answer. Am I going to tell them "No, she's not my only child - but she's my only living child." or am I going to, in a sense, lie because it's easier to say "Yes, she's my only child."

Most people, unless they've either experienced a stillbirth or death of a child, don't have to stop and think about that.

What's Been the Hardest for You as a Square-Peg?

Two things come to mind:

One, growing up I really felt like I was always standing on slightly shifting ground - like the ground was always shifting underneath my feet.

A lot of that had to do with friendships, really formative relationships as a young girl and into my teens, where I would show up at school one day and my friends had decided not to speak to me that day. That could go on for days and I would always be like: "I love you! I don't understand why you are doing this to me."

And I would always take them back into my life when they decided to speak to me again.

What that really played into for me was this fear that who I am is not lovable, so it's interesting because that comes up again and again.

I've made changes recently where I've stopped drinking and eating many things for health reasons, and also for my own personal and spiritual growth.

I don't do gluten, I don't eat dairy, I don't eat sugar, I don't eat meat. These felt like the right decisions to make, but they've also distanced me from certain friends.

So there's a part of me that gets hooked into "who I am is not lovable" because the closer I get to being who I feel like I truly am inside - and the more the outside mirrors that - the more people I lose.

That's a perception, and it's not really true because I've also gained so many more people. But there's a sense over the last decade that with some of my closest friends we're not as close anymore because of some of those changes.

So I think one of the hardest things is hooking into that deeply held feeling of not being worthy, not being lovable for who I am. I don't know where it comes from and it doesn't matter because it's not true.

That's a big one - that's been a challenge for me. And I think the other one is about finding my own way and trusting myself.

There's a part of me that goes: "Ohmygod, I'm 3 days away from being 41 and what have I done? What have I accomplished in the traditional trajectory of: go to school, get a degree, get a job, work at your job, make money, buy a house - all of those things? I don't feel like I can tick off a lot of those."

So part of it for me is not being able to identify with the visible, outward signs of traditional success. What I do to counteract that is sit down and say to myself: "What do I have, what have I done, who am I in the world and how am I bringing good to the world?"

I'm hearing that you talk with yourself when things are bothering you - would you tell us what other kinds of things you do for yourself?

What things do I do? I have a lot of them. I think that my fundamental one is to really stay connected with my body and the information that I get in my body about whether something feels good or right - or it doesn't.

I have a couple of practices that just help me move back into a place of trust. And really, for me that's the crux of it: do I trust myself, do I trust the universe?

I do a lot of yoga, walking, dancing. That really helps me when I want to pull myself out of one of those emotional or thought spirals where I feel like I'm kind of spinning - which happens for good reasons and bad reasons.

It can be the comparison thing, it can be feeling like I'm less than or unlovable or any of those old childhood things that get triggered.

Or it happened to me the first time someone offered to pay me my full fee - I went into this incredible spiral like: "Ohmygosh, do I deserve this?" I am definitely able to talk to myself, to talk through some of those old voices. I recognize them because I've worked with them for so many years now!

The ocean! Getting outside and sitting on the beach is one of my big healers. We live 50 yards from the beach! I'm so lucky, this was a childhood dream of mine - and it took me 37 years to get here. It's amazing!

Sometimes I need to journal to get that out. I'll do that a lot. I did that a lot after Benjamin died, just to get the information out - and then just slowing my world down and giving myself the time and space to be silent and still so that I can then hear whatever is happening.

It's a bit magical and miraculous to me when I do create the time and space and I have a question or a concern - the answers that come are just amazing.

What's Your Favorite Square-Peg Trait?

I used to say it was my ability to laugh, but I think now I would say it's my ability to love.

I feel as though I'm willing to meet people with open arms and open heart. It doesn't matter what they look like, what they're dressed like, who they are or what their background is, I just want to - I really live to see the good in people.

To see that they are, they were, born beautiful - I don't know what happened in their lives, but that's worth knowing: that they are worthy of love.

What Are Your Favorite Books?

Part of what's happened to me with these practices of living in the moment is that my memory is not as good as it used to be, so you could ask me this tomorrow and my answer might be different.

Right now I don't do a lot of reading of fiction because I just don't feel that I have a lot of space in my life for that. What I do love is having a collection of books around me that I can just pick up and go to for answers or inspiration or just a breath.

I really like the Channel Series by Sanaya Roman. Opening to Channel: How to Connect with Your Guide; Living with Joy; Personal Power Through Awareness; and Soul Love - those are good resources for me.

The Artist's Way, The Right to Write, Rumi, Hafiz. I have my animal medicine cards.

I really love - well, I have to say one of my favorite books in the world is Half the Sky by Nicholas D. Kristof. Reading that book changed me, and I think it should be required reading! It's such an eye opener!

Basically, it goes through the plight of women around the world - mostly in non-Westernized countries. Wow, the horrors that women endure! What they do {in the book} is describe the situation so that it breaks your heart, and then they tell you about these women who are in the middle of the situation and changing it.

It's so well researched and so well written, so deeply loving and inspiring - it's become a real movement.

So that book, any book that really touches my heart, that makes me feel like we are connected - because we are!

I just have to say, because it was such a life changer for me back when I was a teenager, The Mists of Avalon was the first book I ever read that was told from a female point of view - where the protagonist, all the way through, was a woman!

Visit Alana at Alana Sheeren: Journey to a Luminous You

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Eric Maisel, Get a Grip

2013-05-03T09:43:22-04:00

Wait! That post title is probably confusing.

I've got no gripe with Eric Maisel - as a matter of fact I want to share an excerpt with you (entitled Get a Grip on Your Mind) from his new book Making Your Creative Mark (thanks to the generosity of his publisher, New World Library).

Whether you think you're a creative - or not (and everyone IS a creative, just sayin') you'll find much helpful (and practical) information in Eric Maisel's book for working with your mind, for getting things done, for encouraging yourself!

Before sharing the excerpt I want to point out that Eric Maisel and I use very different words around dealing with our inner voices. Maisel uses militant language at times (i.e.: "actively combat", "You must battle", "fight the thought tooth and nail"), but we're both talking about noticing and listening to those inner thoughts and voices.

And about allowing your thoughts - all of them! In Maisel's tip #3, called Listen to what you say to yourself , he writes about (what else?) listening to yourself - how you can't work with your thoughts if you're not aware of them. So blinking true!

In I Hear Voices I wrote about The Guest House Approach to connecting with our inner voices, but I didn't write about dealing with them.

Making Your Creative Mark opened my eyes to the idea of setting boundaries for our thoughts/inner voices, particularly the ones (to use a Maisel phrase) "that don't serve you".

Like every book of Eric Maisel's that I've read, there are many practical ideas that you can put to work for yourself right away (I love, Love, LOVE practical ideas, being - you know - less than practical minded myself these are like magic to me).

I'll leave you now to read an excerpt from Eric Maisel's wonderful new book, Making Your Creative Mark - where you'll find some great tools for working with your mind!

Here 'tis - enjoy!

Get a Grip on Your Mind

An Excerpt from Making Your Creative Mark by Eric Maisel

Creating depends on having a mind quiet enough to allow ideas to bubble up. Living a successful, healthy life as an artist requires that your self-talk align with your goals and your aspirations. Your job is to quiet your mind and extinguish negative self-talk. These are your two most important tasks if you want a shot at your best life in the arts. Here are some handy tips:

1. Recognize that you are the only one who can get a grip on your mind. There is no pill to take. There is no one to consult. There is nothing to read. You must mind your mind. You can let your thoughts do whatever they want and go off in any direction, or you can say, “No, that thought doesn’t serve me.” Only you can do that work.

2. Recognize that you do not have to accept, tolerate, or countenance a thought just because you thought it. You may have the thought, “Wow, John really made me angry at work today!” Then it is your choice whether to brood about John or whether to get on with your novel. It may be easier to brood about John than to write your novel, so you may have powerful reasons to stay angry. It’s your choice.

When we say something to ourselves like “My novel stinks” or “I won’t play well tonight,” we believe that thought just because we thought it. But many of our thoughts are simply not true, and even if they are true, they may not serve us.

3. Listen to what you say to yourself. If you can’t hear your own thoughts, you can’t get rid of the ones that aren’t serving you. If you can’t admit to yourself that you are constantly thinking that life is a cheat, that you’ve badly disappointed yourself by wasting so much time, or that you hate to be criticized, you won’t be able to dispute and extinguish those thoughts. Yes, it can be extremely painful to admit to them, but it is better to grapple with them than to let them cycle endlessly.

4. Decide if what you are telling yourself serves you. You are not looking at the truth or falsity of a thought but rather at whether the thought is or isn’t serving you. Countless true thoughts do not serve us. All the following may be true thoughts that nevertheless do not serve you to think: “I might have written ten books by now”; “Writing a novel is hard”; “Selling a novel is hard”; “I’m not sure I have it in me either to write a novel or to sell a novel.” None of those thoughts, even if true, serve you. The only thought that serves you, if you want to write a novel, is “I am off to my novel!”

5. When you decide that a thought doesn’t serve you, dispute it and dismiss it. It can seem very strange at first to dispute your own thoughts. Yet dispute them you must. Get in the habit of saying to yourself, “That was an interesting thought. Does it serve me?” If you know or suspect that it doesn’t, dismiss it out of hand. Do not linger over it! This sounds like “That thought doesn’t serve me and I am dismissing it!” Mean it when you say it!

6. When a thought that doesn’t serve you lingers, actively combat it. Some thoughts just won’t go away. Maybe it’s “No one wanted my first novel, and my second novel is an even more difficult sell, so why in heaven’s name am I writing it?” You may not be able to get rid of this thought simply by snapping your fingers. Then do more than snap your fingers — fight the thought tooth and nail. Maybe you’ll have to write out the ten reasons why this book may be wanted. Maybe you’ll have to chat seriously with yourself about self-publishing. You must battle brooding, clinging, disabling thoughts — or else you will be thinking them regularly.

7. After you’ve disputed and dismissed a thought, think a thought that does serve you. Creating thought substitutes is an important part of the process. These substitutes can be tailored to the situation, or they can be simple global affirmations that you create once and use over and over again, such as “I’m perfectly fine,” “Back to work,” “Right here, right now,” or “Process.” Because for so many of us the default way of thinking is negative, self-critical, and injurious, we want to create and use thought substitutes that help prevent our brain from conjuring up its usual distortions and distractions.

8. Get in the smart habit of extinguishing unproductive self-talk even before it arises. Often we know when a thought is coming. Maybe you’ve been waiting to hear from an editor who said she would call on Tuesday, and now it’s Friday. You know that if she doesn’t call today, you are certain to begin thinking thoughts like “She’s never going to call,” “She’s about to reject my work,” and “I can’t stand all this waiting.” You know these thoughts are coming. So extinguish them now and replace them with “I’m spending the weekend working on my new pet project! And I won’t think about that editor until Monday!” How many times have you known that a thought that doesn’t serve you is coming and let yourself think it anyway? It’s time to stop doing that.

9. Engage in active cognitive support. This means creating the thoughts that you want to be thinking and then thinking them. These thoughts might include all of the following: “I paint every single morning”; “I’m going to succeed”; “I know how to make meaning”; “I’m lavishing my love and attention on my current painting”; “I’m not afraid of process”; “I show up”; “I take the risks that I need to take, with my work and in the marketplace”; “I am creating a body of work”; “I am a painter.” You can think thoughts like these if you choose to think them.

You may never have thought about the possibility of getting a grip on your mind. I hope that you’ll seriously consider it now.

Eric Maisel is the author of Making Your Creative Mark and twenty other creativity titles including Mastering Creative Anxiety, Brainstorm, Creativity for Life, and Coaching the Artist Within. America’s foremost creativity coach, he is widely known as a creativity expert who coaches individuals and trains creativity coaches through workshops and keynotes nationally and internationally. He has blogs on the Huffington Post and Psychology Today and writes a column for Professional Artist Magazine. Visit him online at http://www.ericmaisel.com.

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A Day of Nothing

2013-04-30T13:24:32-04:00

A Day of Nothing sounds easy, right?

Well, it sounded easy to me. As easy as that Teaching Math to Elementary School Students class sounded when, as an undergrad, I learned that it would satisfy some of my required Math credits (hmmm, maybe that should've put up some red flags).

Kylie Bellard leads A Day of Nothing* monthly (if you haven't met Kylie, please come on over to her Square-Peg People Interview and say "Hi!"). I attended the April 2013 gathering.

I'm not a Type-A personality - hardly! I'm laid back, sometimes to the extreme (the word lazy was thrown at me a LOT when I was a kid). I kinda rock sitting - and doing nothing. Or so I thought.

It's amazing how much we do when we don't think we're doing much - and how much we need rest. REAL rest, mind as well as body. I say this as though it applies to you as much as it does to me because I bet it does!

It's hard to do nothing! Not that Kylie's Day of Nothing involved forcing ourselves to do nothing - it didn't! She encouraged non-doing in the gentlest way, and in whatever form we chose (less of this, more of that - whatevva).

I was surprised by the amount of planning doing nothing took - the amount of things to think about. If Kylie hadn't worked this stuff into the process I would not have thought about most of it until it was nearly up my nose (so to speak).

What about my daily self-care stuff - yoga and facial acupressure and my gratitude journal and and and??? What about the little things I do for my home-folk in a normal day? Do I do them? Do I drop them for a day? Set them up the night before? What about meals?

What about the weeds (and me with a new weed wacker)? The weeds were like a jungle outside my house. But weren't they close to the same the day before (ok, maybe a few inches shorter - but still)? And wouldn't they be pretty much the same the next day (adding in that 4 or 5 inches they'd grow through the night what with the rain we were supposed to get)?

I decided YES to my daily self-care stuff, YES to a few little things I do for my home-folk, and NO to internet, writing related to work, laundry and those weeds.

{Aside: Ok, that NO to the weeds might have been a mistake - my Nothing Day was probably the best day to whack. It's rained since then - and more is promised. So I'll probably need a 10 person crew with scythes (and maybe a helicopter) by the time I get to head out there. But I didn't know about all that - and I'm glad I didn't. Aside ended}

It's so easy to do one more thing. And one more. And even easier to think about one more thing, then another and another. Turns out that planning and expediting non-doing is a great way to become very conscious of what you do, your default settings. A way to seriously notice priorities, and (of course) mostly to relax.

Most interesting thing that happened during my Day of Doing Nothing: I went to take a nap (I've been taking naps lately as a self-care kind of thing) and realized I didn't want a nap - and further realized that the naps had been a kind of default-mode way to deal with being overwhelmed. Good to know!

I highly recommend a day of nothing - a whole day of nothing - a planned day of nothing (which I found is sooo different from just taking a day off - which is why I also recommend Kylie's A Day of Nothing*)

Doing nothing - it's not just for overachievers! Who knew?

*I'm not an affiliate, just sharing some love

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Psst, check out our two new packages (e-guide + MP3's) at the links below & you can hear a couple sample stories (MP3)!

Square-Peg Celebrtion: Stories of Acceptance & Grace

Community Is An Inside Job: Support & Connection From the Inside Out

I'm SO Exciting!

2013-04-25T12:08:43-04:00

I mentioned in the last post that Little Princess, my granddaughter, used to utter the phrase "I'm so exciting!" when she was super excited.

She doesn't say it anymore, but it's almost the first thing I think of (or else The Pointer Sisters' song) whenever I'm so exciting excited.

Today I'm thinking of the phrase AND hearing The Pointer Sisters - because I am uber excited!

The two themed packages that Slightly-Brit and I compiled are READY!

We searched through over 500 blog posts to pull together 2 collections that really speak to Square-Pegs, that talk about the things we face daily in the round-hole world. Words (and audio - we've got recordings!!) that encourage and inspire, not ass-kick or point out what's wrong with you.

You can read about both of them (and our other e-guides) on the Square-Peg Shop , or

You can read about Square-Peg Celebration: Stories of Acceptance & Grace here.

And you can read about Community Is An Inside Job: Support & Connection From The Inside Out here.

Each of the pages linked above has a sample (MP3) featuring one of the essays from that package. Come on over and have a listen!

Hellooooo

2013-04-21T23:11:34-04:00

I've been working nose-to-the-grindstone (ouch) and though I have about a zillion things I want to tell you I haven't been able to get over here to tell you - sigh.

When I saw this quote I told myself: "Self, seriously - you gotta stop and share this - pair it with one of Slightly-Brit's gorgeous photos from the Philly Flower Show!" so I listened to myself and here we are:

This will be our reply to violence: to make music more intensely, more beautifully, more devotedly than ever before. - Leonard Bernstein

P.S. As my granddaughter used to say while jumping up and down in anticipation of something wonderFULL: "I'm so exciting!" : )

Tomorrow's (4/23) issue of The Encourager will have a sample from one of our soon-to-be-released themed-packages. Sign up to be on the list!

Did You Know?

2013-04-11T14:42:32-04:00

Did you know that Slightly-British Daughter has a blog? And that it features her gorgeous photos??

Well - she does. It's called Paper Helen, and it's chockFULL of her photographs. One of the things I love most about Slightly-Brit's photos is how (just like she does in the rest of her life), she really sees the details!

The thing about that is: when she points out the details that I miss (coz I miss the details a LOT) - she points them out with such love, such adoration, that I not only see them, but 'get' them. I fall in love with those details.

Makes me think of the great (I only had a few, but wow - what a difference those few made!) teachers I've had, whose love of what they taught/saw was contagious. Go visit her and say "Hi!" Well, I mean - if the idea appeals to you (feeling bossy - sigh).

Did you further know that Andrea Mauer invited me to do a guest post on her site while she was on vacation?

Well, she did - and since she asked me to write a post for her Daily Love Letters feature I wrote about self-love/self-care. Come visit me at Andrea's (giggling now as I get into this being bossy thing!)

And one last "Did you know?". Did you know that The Encourager went out yesterday (that's Square-Peg People's newsletter virtual tea party)?

Well, it did! And in it there was a picture of me, GarageBand and the laundry basket that assisted me in my recording (mentioned earlier in the post Improv).

You might want to jump up there (top, right) to our Encourager sign-up button - because you don't wanna miss things like that picture ; ) <-evil, yet adorable, grin.

Two Birds, One Stone

2013-04-09T15:43:51-04:00

Not to worry - no birds were killed! What happened was:

I was outside a couple hours ago, doing some (much needed!) yard work. I was also pondering what I might share with you here on the blog.

Lately I've been spending a lot of time finalizing the two packages Slightly-Brit and I are putting together (signature packages, I'd say - except I won't say because I'm trying to stick to ONE topic - ahem) and so I haven't shared here as often as I'd like.

So...out in the back yard, using a power tool on some tall grasses, I was reminded of a fight I had with one of those grasses a couple/few years ago.

And I remembered that I wrote a post about it called Move Your Grass - describing the misadventures we had attempting to move a ridiculously large tall grass to a new spot.

All the fun of a very uncoordinated woman (that'd be me) attempting to move something that probably shouldn't have been moved, working with a wheelbarrow that had other plans, while tossing rocks at loved ones (ok, one rock).

There you go - two birds (and there's even a stone involved - if you count the rock I threw): 1. I figured out that I could (re) share the Move Your Grass story with you and 2. I got some yard work done.

Actually, there's a third bird here. I also figured out why, despite putting in some new raised bed boxes, and discussing loads of great garden ideas, we haven't really done anything with the gardens for a couple years - I think Slightly-Brit and Manchild are afraid to go out there with me now!

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

2013-04-03T15:14:06-04:00

I've been misreading and mishearing things lately. Lots of things. And often mentioning what I've misread or misheard before I realize I heard or read wrong.

Maybe I'll get my Mrs. Malaprop badge soon.

{Aside: doesn't designing and creating badges for Square-Peg traits and characteristics, and then displaying them somewhere - like a Girl Scout sash - sound all kinds of wonderful?}

Sooooo - Slightly-British Daughter was telling me about a playlist she put together. She knows that there are a few of her favorite things that are NOT my favorite things.

She also knows I'm looking forward to hearing her new playlist (she picks the best music!), so she wanted to warn me that the song These Are a Few of My Favorite Things (by McCoy Tyner) was going to be on the list.

I am not a fan of the song These Are a Few of My Favorite Things.

Probably the #1 reason I'm not a fan is how the #!$&-ing thing sticks in my mind. I can't hear it and be done with it - bits of it crop up uninvited much later - and again - and again - and again.

Case in point - I walked away from talking with Slightly-Brit about her playlist and was whistling that damn tune before I even got 20 feet away! (2nd aside: I'm an inveterate whistler, and SBD claims you can judge my mood by my whistling - I'm not so sure).

Anyway, there I was whistling These Are a Few of My Favorite Things even though it's not (one of my favorite things).

Then the lyrics started prancing thru my mind while I whistled. Argh - the tune's not enough?!

...when the dog bites, when the bee stings...

on and on.

Until, at one point, I was mystified. I could not remember all the words to one of the stanzas.

I was still whistling - and pondering the words to one particular phrase - when I crossed paths with SBD.

At first I didn't ask - I just sang out what I knew, humming when I got to the words that I couldn't remember.

No response.

I did it again and got a quizzical glance and the remark: "What the hell?"

Taking that as an invitation I hum~sang again:

"hmmm, hmmmm Wild beasts that hmmm with the moon on their wing hmmm hmmm hmmm"

SBD's next response: "Whaaaaaaaaaaat?"

I stopped singing and asked: "The words to that song - I can't remember all of them, what are they?"

"What song?" (What song? Is she deaf? I'd been whistling, humming and struggling with the words right in front of her for 5 minutes!).

I calmly replied: "These Are A Few of My Favorite Things." I hum~sang again:

"hmmmm, hmmm

Wild beasts that hmmmm with the moon on their wing hmmm hmmm hmmm"

SBD looked like she was in pain, but she was actually clutching her tummy and bending in because she was laughing. Hmmph!

"You were close", she corrected, "it's wild geese".

Yeah, that makes more sense. I want my badge now.

Mud-luscious

2013-03-30T14:37:26-04:00

I got up crazy late today and then sat around a crazy long amount of time just staring (appreciatively) at the sun, the trees, even the weeds.

I knew exactly what I wanted to come over here to say to you about today, about Spring (but I had to borrow a word from e.e. cummings to do it): mud-luscious...

it's just so mud-luscious outside my house today. I want to invite you over to make mudpies - and maybe find a couple puddles to jump in!

So I hunted around the interwebs for e.e. cummings' poem, to make sure I was spelling mud-luscious correctly (you never know). And then hunted some more, because I wanted to share a couple lines from i thank you God for most this amazing day, another cummings' poem - and one that plays through my head often in Spring...

I found a YouTube video of e.e. himself, reading i thank you God for most this amazing day (linked in case you want to go listen - it's audio with a picture of e.e.) -

and then, because of what I saw on the place where I found that video, I fell even more in love - with today, with Spring, with music.

The place where I found the e.e. cummings' YouTube video was on composer, conductor Eric Whitacre's site, which led me to Eric Whitacre's TED Talk. Oh!

Oh! OH! OHHHHH!

This TED Talk is heart-opening past words. Find time to watch it! P.S. I just read somewhere, and now can't find the place, that Eric Whitacre's was the first TED Talk complete standing ovation.

(around 11 ~ 11 1/2 minutes in he talks about noticing "actual connection" in what he's seen and been part of through the internet. I've seen and been part of those kinds of connections, too - and it made my heart smile and nod in agreement (which felt good because there are more than a few naysayers stating that online connection is all fake, not the real thing).