Today is later. Today the death certificates came. I’m the “informant”. “Daughter” it says. On the death certificate of my father.  The fact I’m old enough to be in some official capacity on someone’s death certificate is something of an alarm. One of those rites of passage. Of the aging process. Something that only happens to those of us blessed enough to have outlived a loved one I guess.

My biological father, a man whose memory has been firmly, neatly, summarily slammed the door on, died on August 13.  Did I think he’d never die? Did I think I wouldn’t know? Or that I wouldn’t care? I can’t say now what I thought before August 13, but whatever it was, was wrong on all counts.

Making ice cream with my father

“Father” is to be distinguished from a Daddy. Well you already know that. They are often one and the same. But maybe just as often, to give a nod to all those who’ve raised children not of their own blood line, not. Thankfully I still have a Daddy. He came into my life simultaneously with the cessation of my father hearing my 9 or 10 year old voice call him “Dad.”  My Daddy is the first love of my life.  All the respect, admiration, love that I can muster is his. And he knows it.  He mourns with me, expected my confusion upon this event, and prays for my grief to be relieved.

I’m shocked by the emotional fallout. Unanticipated, unplanned, unprepared. Pretty much everything falling in the “un” category.  With the exception of distraught, stunned, brought to my knees, and as my mother puts it “the gut wrenching emotions that you could have only experienced at his death and not a moment before”.

As my father became an old, withered man, I became a vibrant, full grown woman. And I failed to realize that. My memories of him, set in the unchanging past, did not progress true to life.  Reality failed me. The tables turned my friends at a point I neglected to observe. The caregiver/parent became the needy and the needy/child became the caregiver. It is the cycle of life.  A cycle of life I regretfully missed.

There are times we recognize we really messed up. We missed the mark. Times of mistake and regret and longing that can never be reconciled between those of flesh and blood. I find myself against one of those. In the end, my father and I are both guilty of the same thing – abandonment;  the degree and timing of which is now suddenly and irrevocably irrelevant.

There’s a price to pay for turning the other cheek and never bothering to swivel back to check the direction from which you turned.

The tears will dry over time.  But I’ll be left with this for the rest of my days: while I may have had no need for a Daddy for the last 40 years of my life, I now sadly know there was always room in my life for one more person.

Sundown. Salt Plains National Wildlife Refuge.

A day hot enough to create mirages on the searing highway provides a vivid imagination the creative force to visualize the sea that once flooded the Great Plains. The tangible remains of the sea are now an expanse of salt flats. The only place in the world where chocolate brown selenite crystals with hourglass sand inclusions are found.  Beats me why the state of Oklahoma hasn’t pounded home that travel destination highlight.

A shallow sea covered western Oklahoma during the Permian Period (200+ million years ago). The mountains worn down, sand and mud eroded from land in the eastern half of the state and were carried by rivers flowing westward. The climate becoming warm and dry resulted in deposits of gypsum and salt from the evaporating sea water. The salt layers still underlie much of the area, but at the Salt Plains National Wildlife Refuge they’re dissolved by natural ground-water flow, the resultant brines drying and crusting on the surface.

One of nine National Wildlife Refuges in Oklahoma, the refuge is designated as the “largest such saline flat in the central lowlands of North America”. As well as being habitat for over 300 species of birds, the refuge has been designated a Globally Important Bird Area, a Member of the Western Hemisphere Shorebird Reserve Network and critical habitat for the endangered whooping crane. Hourglass sand inclusions and whooping cranes. I believe that noteworthy.

A certain area of the 10,000 acre salt flats at the refuge still has gypsum concentrations high enough to continually grow the selenite crystals. From April to October, rotating designated areas allow a free-for-all dig, with a few restrictions on what amount of crystals can be removed. Bring your shovel, sun screen, and plan to get dirty.

The gate leading into the crystal digging area is located six miles west of Jet, Oklahoma on US 64, then north on a dirt road for three miles, then east one mile. Don’t get lost.

Robert Rhoads, a 38-year resident and Fayetteville’s Commissioner of Advertising & Promotion says “the town has grown into a most remarkable city that never fails to shock newcomers and visitors alike.”  He adds, “I’ve heard repeatedly over the years the defining and universal comment, “it’s nothing like I expected!”".

Standing in Fayetteville on a sunny Saturday, I can echo that sentiment. I’m struck by how similar the multitude of colorful images is to the childhood experience of traveling via my red Viewmaster.  By loading a round reel of photographic images into the slot, a new scene flashed with every click of the lever.

Had Fayetteville made its way to a Viewmaster reel, you’d see Osage Indians, the Butterfield Overland Mail stagecoach route, Civil War battles, New Orleans’ French Quarter influences, signs of Italian heritage, Arkansas’ largest performing arts center, a $23 million public library that’s been cited by The New York Times’ travel section, and a remarkable 8,000 pound bronze sphere shouting messages of peace in over 100 languages.

Fayetteville was founded in 1828 (eight years before Arkansas’ statehood) on land previously set aside for the western Cherokee nation. Its original town patent was issued by President Andrew Jackson.

The town’s name was chosen because two of the original city commissioners hailed from Fayetteville, Tennessee. Census data indicates Fayetteville flourished until early 1862 when Confederate forces were ordered to torch it. From that initial burning to the end of the war in 1865, the town was at the center of numerous engagements between the Confederacy and the Union and you’ll see proof of this in the cemeteries and historical markers scattered about. Progress returned when the first regularly scheduled passenger train of the St. Louis & San Francisco Railway arrived from Pierce City, Missouri in 1882.

Italian settlers came to the area in the 1680′s. One of the earliest and most noteworthy, Henri de Tonti is sometimes referred to as the “Father of Arkansas.” A soldier, explorer, and fur trader, de Tonti sailed under the French flag accompanying René-Robert Cavelier on his explorations of the Mississippi River.  In 1686 de Tonti established a trading post that became Arkansas Post (Arkansas County), the state’s first permanent Euro-American settlement. Tontitown, was named for de Tonti.

Today the city in Northwest Arkansas, south of Springdale and north of the Boston Mountains, has a permanent population approximating 69,000 and is home to the University of Arkansas’ Razorbacks.  In March 2010, Forbes Magazine ranked it 7^th on their list for Top College Sports Towns and 4^th in their 2009 list of Best Places for Business and Careers. In 2009, Kiplinger Magazine ranked the city 7^th on their Best Places to Live, Work and Play list; Builder Magazine placed it #9 on their list of Healthiest Housing Markets, and Business Week placed the city on its list of Best Small Cities for Startups and named it the Best City in Arkansas.

Go see it for yourself. Leave the Viewmaster at home.

Fayetteville Little Black Book:

Where to stay. What to do. Where to eat.

Sightseeing & Events:

• The Billgrimage Tour starts here in the house where a two-term United States President and the current Secretary of State married and began their life before entering the public eye. 930 California Blvd.; 479-444-0066; www.clintonhousemuseum.org
• Not interested in the Billgrimage Tour but you love history? Stop by the Visitor’s Center on the historic town square, 21 S. Block Avenue and pick up the Historic Walking Tour brochure.  www.experiencefayetteville.com
• Dickson Street: Fayetteville’s social center of activity.  www.dicksonst.com
• The Walton Arts Center anchors Dickson Street’s multi-cultural vibe. Through an unusual partnership between public and private sectors and a shared vision, the facility opened, debt free, on April 26, 1992. The center serves as the university’s and the community’s performing arts center, is home to the North Arkansas Symphony and hosts the annual Wal-Mart shareholder’s meetings.  495 West Dickson Street; 479-443-5600. www.waltonartscenter.org.
• Fayetteville Public Library:  88,000 square feet of an over-the-top learning experience.  In June 2005 the library won the coveted national Library of the Year award sponsored by Library Journal and Thompson/Gale Publishers. In 2006 the library was named an American Landmark Library by TravelSmart newsletter. 410 W. Mountain Street. www.faylib.org
• Bikes, Blues & Barbeque: Motorcycles, Blues Music and world class barbeque. It takes place this year from September 29 – October 2. www.bikesbluesandbbq.org
• Arkansas & Missouri Express Train: The Arkansas and Missouri Railroad is one of the few commercial lines left in the United States that operates both freight and passenger service. Enjoy a leisurely ride from a by-gone era through the scenic Boston Mountains and into the historic Arkansas River Basin. All passengers travel in refurbished antique passenger cars or the first class parlor coach. 800-687-8600; www.arkansasmissouri-rr.com
• World Peace Prayer Fountain, the “Peace Ball”: Located in front of Town Center, this is a beautiful piece of public art. Ten feet in diameter and 8,000 pounds of bronze inscribed in over 100 languages with “May Peace Prevail on Earth”, water spills continually over the top and into a pool below. The sculpture took Fayetteville sculptor Hank Kaminsky 16 months to construct.
• Chi Omega Greek Theatre: Built in 1930, added to the National Register of Historic Places in 1992, this outdoor theatre on the University of Arkansas campus is a replica of the Theatre of Dionysus at the foot of the Acropolis in Greece.

Dining:

www.dineinfayetteville.com

• Hugo’s: Have the beer cheese soup, a blue moon burger (blue cheese on great beef), a basket of fries, and anything else you think you can handle. It’s all good.  25 ½ N. Block Ave.; www.hugosfayetteville.com

• Theo’s American Kitchen & Cocktail Lounge: Part Greenwich Village, part New Orleans. The bar is a destination all its own. Renowned for their martinis. 318 N. Campbell Avenue, just off Dickson Street; 479.527.0086; www.theosfayetteville.com
• The Common Grounds bills themselves as a gourmet espresso bar. But they’re so much more. They have the requisite selection of coffee, lattes, cappuccinos, and hot chocolate. It gets interesting though when you move past that. Their bakery case offerings are decedent. They offer a full breakfast, lunch and dinner menu, a full bar, and a selection of cigars. Oh, and ice cream. 412 W. Dickson Street; 479-442-3515; www.commongroundsar.com
• Hog Haus Brewing Company is the only operating brewery in the Northwest Arkansas area. Located in a building reminiscent of New Orlean’s balconied perches. 430 W. Dickson Street; 479-521-2739; www.hoghaus.com
• The Flying Burrito: Burrito bar extraordinaire. White queso dip worth the trip over. 503 W. Spring St. #220; 479-521-3000; www.flyingburritoco.com
• AQ Chicken:  A fried chicken institution since 1947.  Pan fried chicken with a subtle lemon pepper bite enrobed in the perfect crust.  If you don’t have time to go in, sit down and enjoy it properly, make a dash through the Express drive-through and bring some back to Tulsa.  Highway 71B; 479-473-7555; www.aqchickenhouse.net
• Bordinos Italian Restaurant: 310 W. Dickson St.; 479-527-6795; www.bordinos.com
• Emelia’s Mediterranean Kitchen: Known for their Saturday/Sunday brunch and the salmon omelet (available anytime). 479-527-9800. 309 Suite 2, W. Dickson St.; www.emeliaskitchen.com
• Herman’s Ribhouse:   2901 North College Avenue; 479-442-9671; www.hermansribhouse.com
• Powerhouse Restaurant: 112 North University Avenue; 479-442-8300; www.powerhouseseafoodandgrill.com
• Pesto Italian Café: 1830 North College Avenue; 479-582-3330; www.pestocafe.com

Shopping

• McLellan’s Fly Shop: A full-service fly shop offering top quality fly fishing gear and advice for fishing the White River. 18 W. Sunbridge Dr.; www.mcflyshop.com
• Corazon Interiors.  Wander into the store for no particular reason. The art glass and colorful décor will make you smile. On the square. 155 Block Avenue; 479-587-9294
• French Quarter Antiques: Named one of the “Top 200 Places to Shop in the South” by Southern Living Magazine. 11 North Block Avenue; 479-443-3355; www.french-quarters.com
• French Metro Antiques: Recently voted “Best Antique Shop in Northwest Arkansas ” by Citiscapes Metro Monthly magazine for the fourth year in a row. 200 West Dickson Street; 479-587-0804; www.frenchmetro.com
• Maude Clothing Boutique: A combination of funky vintage furniture and fun unique clothes that make it into a cozy bedroom-like boutique; an eclectic mix of clothing, shoes, purses, jewelry, and accessories. 704 N. College Ave.; 479-935-4700
• Lola:  A contemporary women’s boutique that specializes in luxury basics, premium denim and one of a kind event pieces. 339 Northwest Ave.; 479-443-5535; www.lolaboutique.com
• Something Urban: Trendy clothing and accessories; 643 West Dickson St.; 479-442-0140
• Town & Country Clothing; Women’s specialty store featuring weekend casuals, career suiting, mother-of-the-bride dresses, coats and unique accessories. 9 South Block Avenue; 479-442-5561; www.townandcountryshop.com

Lodging

• Dickson Street Inn: Location, location, location. Boutique hotel with a veranda wine bar overlooking the stirrings on Dickson Street. Lots of character, beautifully restored, and well maintained. 301 W. Dickson Street; 479.695.2100; www.dicksonstreetinn.com

• Inn at Carnall Hall: Campus of the University of Arkansas. On the National Register for Historic Places, the Board of Trustees in 2001 approved to turn the structure into a historic hotel and restaurant at a cost of $6.9 million. 465 Arkansas Avenue; 479-582-0400; www.innatcarnallhall.com

• Pratt Place Inn: AAA Four Diamond. A unique retreat on Sassafras Hill of which the third generation of the Pratt family is preserving. 2231 W. Markham Road; 479-966-4441; www.prattplaceinn.com

Pratt Place Inn; Courtesy

Just For the Vibe

• Anywhere on Dickson Street; www.dicksonst.com
• The veranda at Hog Haus Brewing Company; 430 W. Dickson Street; 479-521-2739; www.hoghaus.com
• The Common Grounds; 412 W. Dickson Street; 479-442-3515; www.commongroundsar.com
• George’s Majestic Lounge. Live music. 519 West Dickson Street; 479-442-4226; www.georgesmajesticlounge.com
• The deck at Theo’s American Kitchen; 318 N. Campbell Avenue, just off Dickson Street; 479.527.0086; www.theosfayetteville.com
• The bar in Bordino’s Restaurant. Wine Spectator 2009 Award of Excellence; 310 W. Dickson St.; 479-527-6795; www.bordinos.com

With my free time I will continue plundering flower beds for a bit longer. Then I return to the keyboard with clean fingernails, whiter and shinier against the bit of tan on skin.

THIS is temptation.  THIS signifies a certain head toss to the grinding pressure of today’s world, a ballsy show of throwing caution to the wind.  If you look at it with just the right tilt of your head, you’ll get the same glint in your eyes.  Selling everything I own would enable the purchase of a few acres in any number of states, on which I could move or build a small house, delivering my bobbling head into town once a week for provisions in THIS.

I don’t succumb. Others in my life would highly disapprove and I highly value these others.  I photograph the Ford and pull back onto the road with a slow-mo melodrama moving frame by frame through my brain. It conveniently loops from the part that shows me walking up to the house, knocking on the door, engaging the owner in negotiations, taking the keys from them and driving away into the sunset in that truck.  My melodramas never include the pragmatic part about what I’d do with all my crap in the Yukon, the Yukon, the exchange of titles, discussing what oil the Ford uses, insurance, etc.

Not many of us ever throw this degree of caution to the wind. But who among us hasn’t entertained the thought of running away from home, even if it’s for a mere few harmless days?  It’s a bit risque and for the first time in my long history of SRTs I see it for that. You’re out there by the droves sending me emails  about the longing to get out there. I fully understand the longing. Few things in our lives are as liberating, empowering, and rejuvenating as a solo road trip.

So I ask all of you with latent and repressed open road wanderlust sitting at home fantasizing about the cloak of anonymity, arm draped over the wheel, or resting lightly on handle bars, aren’t you late, for nowhere in particular?