Slurping Lifehttp://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/because life is too yummy to sipenFri, 13 Nov 2009 06:00:00 PSTTypePad http://www.typepad.com/Kids & FamilyHealth/Fitness & NutritionSociety & Culture/Personal JournalsMusicComedynoA mom by birth and adoption shares - through photography, writing and humor - parenting boys who live with autism, ADHD, bipolar disorder, cerebral palsy, fetal alcohol spectrum disorder and more. Reminding everyone that children with special needs are kihttp://slurpinglife.typepad.com/http://www.feedburner.com/fb/images/pub/fb_pwrd.gifSlurpingLifehttp://feedburner.google.comSubscribe with My Yahoo!Subscribe with BloglinesSubscribe with NetvibesSubscribe with GoogleSubscribe with Bitty BrowserSubscribe with Live.comSubscribe with Excite MIXSubscribe with WebwagSubscribe with Daily RotationSubscribe with FeedLoungeA Baby on the Wayhttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SlurpingLife/~3/zIUy-LypiCI/a-baby-on-the-way.htmlAdoptionBipolar DisorderDailydepressionParentingbipolar disorderinspirationparentingMelodyThu, 12 Nov 2009 21:12:04 PSTtag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341bfadf53ef0120a631398f970c-1-49It's not now or never 

It's not black & it's not white 

Anything worth anything 

takes more than a few days 

& a long, long night

~Deb Talan

The words above were recently discovered and led me to these lyrics...

Every one of us an orphan

Our bodies born from dust of the stars.

We can comfort each other in this place

I can look into your eyes 

And see my own face.

~~Deb Talan

Heartfelt gratitude for each of you, my friends, who during recent months have shared words, prayers, hugs and love in comments and emails.

~~~

I will be back here soon.

There is so much to tell you

about

struggle

despair

almost giving up

survival of a family

and

a baby on the way.

First, I just need a little sleep.

ox❤

Melody

]]>It's not now or never It's not black & it's not white Anything worth anything takes more than a few days & a long, long night ~Deb Talan The words above were recently discovered and led me to these lyrics... Every one of us an orphan Our bodies born from dust of the stars. We can comfort each other in this place I can look into your eyes And see my own face. ~~Deb Talan Heartfelt gratitude for each of you, my friends, who during recent months have shared words, prayers, hugs and love in comments and emails. ~~~ I...http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/11/a-baby-on-the-way.htmlBoy to Your Lefthttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SlurpingLife/~3/875USz0TjGU/boy-to-your-left.htmlAdoptionBipolar DisorderDailyFetal Alcohol Spectrum DisorderParentingbipolar disorderchildhood mental illnessparentingpoetryMelodyMon, 05 Oct 2009 19:56:00 PDTtag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341bfadf53ef0120a5ba772a970b-1-14

Appearances

You appear in

This world

Like a seed

Taking in the

Experiences

Of the material

Body

Which you later

Have to present

To the world

As a certificate

Of worth

But nobody

Knows the 

Certificate of the

Soul

The muscle of

The soul

Whether

Weak or strong

Has to swim

And nobody

Knows

How easy or hard

It is for you

And in your best

You are judged

And pushed

And ripped

Forgetting

How difficult

Or easy

It is for this person

In the soul

Of experiences

Not in the appearances

~~Moeze Lalji


]]>Appearances You appear in This world Like a seed Taking in the Experiences Of the material Body Which you later Have to present To the world As a certificate Of worth But nobody Knows the Certificate of the Soul The muscle of The soul Whether Weak or strong Has to swim And nobody Knows How easy or hard It is for you And in your best You are judged And pushed And ripped Forgetting How difficult Or easy It is for this person In the soul Of experiences Not in the appearances ~~Moeze Laljihttp://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/10/boy-to-your-left.htmlLiving Under Waterhttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SlurpingLife/~3/v3u3ZSN1FCk/living-under-water.htmlAdoptionBipolar DisorderDailydepressionFetal Alcohol Spectrum DisorderParentingbipolar disorderjournalmental illnessparentingMelodyMon, 05 Oct 2009 20:37:46 PDTtag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341bfadf53ef0120a6112571970c

-1-42

I’m living under water. Everything seems slow and far away. I know there’s a world up there, a sunlit quick world where time runs like dry sand through an hourglass, but down here, where I am, air and sound and time and feeling are thick and dense.

~~Audrey Niffenegger, The Time Traveler’s Wife

~~~

needing to journal

yet having no words

i borrow words

~~~

I am reading your comments and emails.

"thank you"

♥

]]>I’m living under water. Everything seems slow and far away. I know there’s a world up there, a sunlit quick world where time runs like dry sand through an hourglass, but down here, where I am, air and sound and time and feeling are thick and dense. ~~Audrey Niffenegger, The Time Traveler’s Wife ~~~ needing to journal yet having no words i borrow words ~~~ I am reading your comments and emails. "thank you" ♥http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/10/living-under-water.htmlDays of Letting Gohttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SlurpingLife/~3/YOnTKsFyVUs/days-of-letting-go.htmlAdoptionBipolar DisorderDailyFetal Alcohol Spectrum DisorderParentingbipolar disordermental illnessmood disorderparentingMelodySun, 04 Oct 2009 23:11:22 PDTtag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341bfadf53ef0120a606b055970c"We are discharging him today. We have never had a child whose chemistry is as resistive to any and all medications as is his. We have never worked with a child who is completely unresponsive to all therapeutic interventions as he is. Our best wishes and prayers go with you."

As I prepare to let go of our family as we know it...I am hanging on for dear life, fists clenched in a white knuckle grip.

Heartbreak. Loss. Devastation.

What does a parent do when the doctors, therapists and medications of last resort fail?

I will never be the same.

We will never be the same.

He will never be the same.

God, how does a mother find the strength to make the decision to let go?

How will my child survive?

My mother recently told me that the best decision is not always the easiest one. Doing what is necessary to help someone [who lives with mental illness] that you love with all you have within your heart and soul can be death to your own soul. That this is worse that physical death because in the end...at some point...physical death brings resolve, eventually peace. Mental illness often finds neither.

She has lived this...the impossible decision and the death. She has hurt.

I must trust her words.

I must trust God.

Still.

I can't do it.

My beautiful child should not have to live this.

My fists are clinched in a white knuckle grip...

...not able to let go...

...not able to hold on.

~~~

Away.

]]>"We are discharging him today. We have never had a child whose chemistry is as resistive to any and all medications as is his. We have never worked with a child who is completely unresponsive to all therapeutic interventions as he is. Our best wishes and prayers go with you." As I prepare to let go of our family as we know it...I am hanging on for dear life, fists clenched in a white knuckle grip. Heartbreak. Loss. Devastation. What does a parent do when the doctors, therapists and medications of last resort fail? I will never be the same....http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/10/days-of-letting-go.htmlLose the Inhibitionshttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SlurpingLife/~3/rGTABSon-lM/lose-the-inhibitions.htmlDailyMy Thoughts and PoemsPhotographyBest Shot MondayBSMphoto sharingphotographyMelodySun, 27 Sep 2009 21:52:49 PDTtag:typepad.com,2003:post-6a00d8341bfadf53ef0120a5a2fd08970b

-1-32

Watching as this diverse group of women stood by waiting to go onstage and perform a belly dance, my thoughts were...

How brave and self-assured these women are...mothers, sisters, daughters, women...preparing to go onstage before hundreds of people for a belly dancing performance. 

I felt it...what they have...and I want it...

...that umph go for it spirit...that this is for me do not care what anyone else thinks spirit.

Yeah, that's it. 

It is within me...within you.

Let's go for our dreams. Lose the inhibitions. Drop the excuses.

We have what it takes to achieve our dreams...be our best

Yes, we do.

Can I get a comment high five?

]]>Watching as this diverse group of women stood by waiting to go onstage and perform a belly dance, my thoughts were... How brave and self-assured these women are...mothers, sisters, daughters, women...preparing to go onstage before hundreds of people for a belly dancing performance. I felt it...what they have...and I want it... ...that umph go for it spirit...that this is for me do not care what anyone else thinks spirit. Yeah, that's it. It is within me...within you. Let's go for our dreams. Lose the inhibitions. Drop the excuses. We have what it takes to achieve our dreams...be our best Yes,...http://slurpinglife.typepad.com/slurping_life/2009/09/lose-the-inhibitions.htmlnonadult