With school picking up for the summer, it’s been great to have B’s grandma in town. Since she works from home, she is available to take B for the day so I can hit the books.

Now, packing to leave your baby for a day is difficult in my opinion, until you get it down to a science. The problem I had was figuring how much, and of what to take. She provides diapers, wipes, and a few of the bigger toys so I don’t have to worry about that. I pack all of the above into the Jonathan Adler diaper bag from Skip Hop and it all fits perfectly.

Here’s what we can’t leave without:

• Hat and sunscreen: B is bald. still. And, hello! It’s summer. But babies should still protect their little heads and skin even if it is the fall or winter. (Hat: Babies R Us, sunscreen: Neutrogena for Baby)
• Fabric touch-and-feel book: He loves to just wave this around and put it in his mouth. We found this one at a yard sale when B was starting to feel things for their textures. Unfortunately he is less interested in the textures in the book, more on the fact that he can shove the corner in his mouth.
• Fresh-and-clean outfit: Blow-outs and spit-up. Nuff said.
• Burp Cloth and bib
• 5-6 bottles with water pre-measured for formula: I never know exactly when I’ll get him or how hungry he will be. He usually goes through about half of these but I’d rather be prepared!
• Deep in the Jungle CD his grandma got him: We take it with us so he can have it there and here. I have yet to upload it to my computer or phone. Whoops.
• His ball and the oh-so-amazing Sophie the Giraffe: We don’t leave the house PERIOD without these two. Now that he’s figured out that he can take his binky out and drop it with his hand, the days of binkies appear to be over. That’s where Sophie is great — He can play with it AND chew /suck on her butt! The ball attaches to the links, which attach to anything and he can’t drop it.

This is a great guideline to what I take with me anywhere, but specifically when he spends the day with grandma. And now that  week, I’ll we are at Daycare, I’ve got the daycare packing list down pat and will (of course, why not?) share with you!

This is a story of integrity — a story I hope one day my son will learn from.

In fifth grade, I cheated on my history test. I got detention. I missed recess. I learned from my mistakes. I learn from my mistakes.

I value integrity. Telling lies doesn’t get you anywhere, not forward anyway. When people lie, and get away with it, it makes my blood boil. When they are given the chance to fix a wrong and they don’t, I can’t stand it.

You may or may not know about B’s dad, Matt. I was embarrassed, and didn’t want to write about it. I’ve changed my mind.

He knowingly lied on his enlistment form, denying having dependents (B), just so he could go into the Air Force. He left his son, willingly risked a relationship with his son, and on a daily basis disgraces everything our military has fought and stands for. They honor integrity, just as I do.

I don’t blame him alone. I blame his recruiter who fed him lie after lie so she could meet a quota.

All he had to do was leave himself off the birth certificate. That would give him “plausible deniability,” he could tell them I cheated on him and the child may or may not have been his. He was told he would get a station wherever he wanted, which he did, but that comes later in this story. This was his plan — lie, get away with it for two months, get on the birth certificate with another lie,  and that’s that. Four years later he could be there for his son.

I would like to add, and this is verbatim because I have heard it countless times: “I’m doing this for B; I’m doing this for you.  It’s the only way to provide for you and my son.”

He lied once, and didn’t suffer from any consequences except not being around the awesome child that he chose to leave in the first place. He didn’t learn from his mistakes like I did.

He claims that he wants to Skype with B, but has made no effort. He rarely asks about the child. He rarely even talks to me, who he proposed to after we hadn’t spoken for 2 months and claims he wants to work on the relationship.

He was assigned to be stationed in Japan, one of the five locations he chose that he would like to be stationed. Four, including Japan, were overseas. One was in the U.S.

I don’t know how you develop a relationship with a child when you are on the other side of the world and are on different time schedules and can’t talk. He said he could trade locations, but a mutual friend told me he seemed really excited about Japan. (Why wouldn’t you be if that’s somewhere you’ve always wanted to go?)

He also was about to lie to them again, and try to come home (a 14 hour drive) when he can only go 300 miles away from base. Telling them you’ll be in one place and going to another is a lie. I was able to talk him out of that one.

He’s trying to get on the birth certificate. He told them he didn’t know about the baby until after B was born, after Matt had entered the Air Force.  That, is a lie. And I have plenty of emails to prove it.

My point is, he is all talk. He is a liar.

This is who we are trusting to protect our country, even if he is just behind a computer desk. He is a part of our military.

I, the person who can’t stand people who don’t do the right thing, has to do something. I can’t have my son seeing his dad lying to the military and getting away with it. That would teach him that he can lie and not get in trouble for it. I want my son to be a honorable man when he grows up. I want him to be respectful. I want him to take  responsibility for his actions and face consequences.

Matt didn’t fully understand what he was doing and the consequences that would result. He heard what he wanted to hear — that he could get away with it.

I can’t let this happen. I can’t let him get away with it. He is 24 years old. It’s time he acts like an adult. I don’t know how this ends, but I know they need to know the truth about this, regardless of who tells them. What they decide to do with the information is up to them.

I’m a lover of BBQ.  And now I’m a lover of Q.

Helps that everything is decorated in piggy noses.

From the napkin holders to the table lighting.  Ambiance piggy style.

We’ve tried the pulled chicken (pictured above with greens and hush puppies (or should they be hush PIGGIES?) and my favorite, the pulled pork with SA-WEET sauce.

When you are finished you can head over to our favorite stomping grounds, BABIES ‘R US!

Enjoy your BBQ and let me know what you think!

One song comes to mind, belt it out with me:
WOOOOAAHH WE’RE HALF WAY THERE

Ok, glad we got that out. B IS 6 MONTHS OLD. That definitely deserves a “woah.”

To celebrate his half-birthday, we took him out to breakfast at the Silver Diner. I think he enjoyed himself.

Life with a 6 month old? How do I put this…fantastic?

Since I last wrote to you all, B is sitting up — all on his own! He’s eating more fruits and vegetables, and he has started daycare so I can go to school and be studious and what-not.

He wakes up at the crack of dawn, we nurse and get ready to go. I can tell he loves it, his teacher, and his new “girlfriends.”

My favorite part of my day is picking him up and getting his day-sheet that tells me what they did that day. They sing songs, have lots of tummy-time, play outside and he shares toys with kids! Yes, he SHARES. Sharing is caring, after all!

Remember when he was 4-months-old and I said he was teething? Well we don’t have anything yet. I think he was playing tricks on the doctor and me.

Bebe Stats:

Age: 6 months

Weight: 15.3 pounds

Length: 26.5 inches

Sleep: all night with the exception of our sick nights :(

Feeding: Breast milk when he is with me every 2 hours, formula every 3 hours when he is at daycare. B is starting a mid-afternoon snack, which at the moment is apples. He isn’t a big fan of bananas, but I think we’ll try those again in a few days. His favorite vegetable is still squash or sweet potatoes.

Favorites: This toy that plays music ( I don’t really know what to call it, but here’s a picture) that we got at a yard sale for $4. He still loves sweet potatoes and squash the most!

Medical: Beck got a bad cold this past week since being at daycare (the daycare-bugs claimed yet another victim) which resulted in pink eye. He is back on the Zantac for reflux.

Development: Beck sits up by himself! He is starting to get higher and higher to get on his knees He is saying things like “dada” and “guh-guh” or a combination of the two. We also learned that my boy is a sharer – that’s right — he “shared a toy car with Khloe”. What. a. flirt.

I took a few hours to myself today and went to the pool.  That’s not a metaphor or anything but it probably could be.  Water makes me happy.  As the happy came out, I came to a few realizations.  

My life right now is Maggie and Beck and work.  That’s it.

Part of that is out of necessity.  Maggie’s life is school and Beck.  And on many days, you can add me to her list of responsibilities.  I wish she had time to spend with friends, but that is limited.  I wish I had time to spend with my friends.  But right now I pretty much suck at being anyone’s friend.

The life. The day to day.  We take the baby on a walk.  We talk about where to send him to daycare.  We decide what’s for dinner tonight.  We search for yard sales and we look for baby clothes and gear.  That’s all great and collaborative.

I’m mentally and physically exhausted.

And I’ve lost sight of me.

Actually I’m not sure when there was a me.  *flashy overhead lightbulb*

I do have aspirations.  I do however live in the moment.   When it comes to being tactical, well it’s what I do – both at work and home.  I’m used to putting on bandaids and swatting flies.  When it comes to the big picture and where do we go from here, I struggle.

That’s a lot to make you go through to get to the point of the story.

I’m sorry and thank you for sticking around.  But there is a point to this. Here we go.

I need to learn to set boundaries.  I don’t ever want to become so burned out that I become resentful of my situation and my life right now.

My grandmother watched me after school and during many of the summers while my mom worked.  While she probably wouldn’t have done anything with her life besides “sit on the yellow couch”-  in quotes because that’s what we used to say – I always felt she resented having to take care of me all the time.  She loved me.  Ah-dored me.  And I know it wasn’t about my mom or me doing this to her.  It was about her situation and her pain.

This is where I am.  I could be mad at Beck’s dad for running away.  I could be mad at his family for allowing him to run away.  Many days I am, don’t get me wrong. But it’s not because of what they did.  It’s because of my situation and my pain.  I’m tired.  Maggie is tired.  We’re tired of being tired.  And I want someone to blame so that it makes sense.  It needs to make sense because right now it’s a hot mess and not getting better.  But blaming isn’t the answer.  It’s the bandaid.  It’s the fly swatter.  But it’s not the big picture.

Boundaries.  Pools. Bandaids on flies. I’m going to work on a metaphor for these.

Product received for review:

We’re huge fans of SKIP HOP baby toys and gear.  This print by Jonathan Adler Diaper Bag really matches our lifestyle. But the real story is the bag.  I’ll let you take a look at the pretty……

When zipped the top folds in for a sleeker look.  But we usually have it so full of stuffs that we don’t quite get to the zipping.  Maggie uses it as his daily bag.  Here t’s packed and ready to go to his other Grandma’s (who he visits a lot these days because hey! One can never spend too much time with Grandmas I always say)

It holds a ton and has lots of extras like pockets on the outside for phone and binkys and other essentials,  and a back pocket for a diaper changing pad.  And the straps you see at the top make it the perfect bag to hang on the stroller.  I mean you need easy access to Sophie Giraffe for emergencies, right?

More about the bag…..

• Insulated front bottle pockets hold 2 bottles
• Hangs neatly on shoulder and can be worn over shoulder
• Lightweight laminated fabric wipes clean
• Eight pockets and zip-top closure (fits most laptops)
• Cotton tote straps; faux leather trim
• BPA-free, Phthalate-free
• Size: (inches) 18w x 14h x 6d

This bag is Grandma approved.   Follow them on Twitter, Pinterest and Facebook!

Thank you Skip Hop!

What teachers need:

Happy kids

More pay

Perfect weather for the summer

Sharpened pencils

Paper for the copier

Tissues and wipes

More pay

Parking close to the building

Comfortable shoes

More pay

and last of all

Chocolate.  They need chocolate.

Give Merci chocolates to your favorite teachers this year.  They deserve it!  And they deserve the best.  I love the different flavors of Merci Chocolate.  And I love that they are found at Walmart.  In case you are out looking.

And I’m giving some away.  You just have to comment below to have some sent to YOUR favorite teacher.

Giveaway ends June 13, 2013 at midnight.

Huevos Rancheros with Bison - …the only part I can pronounce without getting tongue tied is the Bison.  Five years of French will do that to you.

“Crispy multigrain tortillas, chorizo and bison hash, farm fresh over easy eggs, peppers, salsa roja, scallions, cilantro, goat cheese, chunky avocado.”

We ate breakfast for Beck’s 6 month birthday at The Silver Diner in Glen Allen.   “Look Granny, I’m eating at the table!”  He wanted the pancakes.  Instead he got his baby oatmeal. He’s such a big boy.

It’s a go-to for our weekend breakfasts, and while I love their ginormous bowls of grits, this HR w/ Bison is my favorite and takes care of me for the rest of the day.  We love that there are no fewer than 5 babies within view in booster seats when we go.  Definitely a family friendly restaurant.  And ask for your drink to go.

And don’t discount the pancakes.  They are delish. I finished Maggie’s for her.  Don’t judge.

Like any good bacon eater she’s not afraid to dip her bacon in the syrup.  Again, don’t judge – you know you do it too.

 Happy Sunday!

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The Blackberry Z10 may be easier to navigate (once you get past the learning curve) for some because it has similarities to a desktop.  I just found the Search Function.  It wasn’t hard to find, I just wasn’t looking for it.

It’s pretty comprehensive in that I’m not just limited to my apps or calendar.  I have them all at my disposal.  Once I launch the Search, I can choose “All” or choose the category – Apps, Contacts, Calendar, etc…

So a Search for “F” auto-populates my apps, contacts, etc that match that query.  Just like my computer.

It’s one more thing that’s making my previously “forgettable” Z10 a little easier to remember!

A while back my sister took us to this great place in downtown Richmond, Alamo BBQ. Right there, nestled in by 22nd street, in a place where I don’t really know, is the best darn barbecue place I have ever been.

“Alamo,” as we call it, has outdoor seating. You walk up, place your order and receive your buzzer. Then, go get your yummy food and enjoy the view. Ok, it’s not much of a view, but it is up hill and you can kind of see the city.

Now, about the food…

My name is Maggie. And I am a cornbread lover.

There’s something about this cornbread with honey-butter.

Maybe it’s just pretty?

I ordered the Pulled Pork with Slaw sandwich, which is about $5.

Simple, juicy and delicious!

I love Alamo, and I will be going back plenty this summer since I’ll be downtown for school. The food isn’t super expensive so it is college student friendly if you can get there. Maybe we will take a trip up there for Memorial Day!

What are your Memorial Day plans? I hope barbecue is involved!