Scientific Nature of the Whammy

Thursday Thirteen: Animation Edition

2009-11-12T00:34:00.000-08:00

Obviously, having a 3 year old in the house means LOTS of cartoons. Whether it's movies or shows, there are always ones that are more entertaining than others. We were watching "Over the Hedge" the other day and I got to thinking about who my favorite animated characters are. So, I decided to make a list because... well, why not?

Thirteen Favorite Animated Characters

Denis Leary as Diego in the "Ice Age" movies.
William Shatner & Avril Lavign as the opossums Ozzie & Heather in "Over the Hedge."
Patrick Warburton as in "Bee Movie."
James Earl Jones as Mufasa in "The Lion King."
Bob Peterson as Dug in "Up."
Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots in the "Shrek" movies.
Danny Elfman as Jack Skellington in "The Nightmare Before Christmas."
Norm MacDonald as Norm the Genie in "The Fairly Odd-Parents."
Tracy Grandstaff as Daria in "Daria."
John Goodman as Sulley in "Monsters Inc."
Pamela Adlon as Bobby Hill in "King of the Hill."
Robin Williams as Genie in "Aladdin."
Richard White as Gaston in "Beauty and the Beast."

I'm sure I'm missing some, and I'll probably remember them as soon as I hit 'publish', but there are some of my favorites none the less! Who are your favorite animated characters?

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others’ comments. It’s easy, and fun!

Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

TV: Because really, what else is there?

2009-11-10T00:34:00.000-08:00

You know how I have been lax on posting? I've been so tired that when I get free time at night when Sam's in bed, all I want to do is relax and when I relax? I enjoy me some TV! Here are some of my thoughts on some new/favorite shows so far this year (sorry Kori! :-)

Supernatural - This is probably my absolute favorite show. I love it so much. This season has not disappointed. I am totally freakd out by Jacob from LOST being Satan, and I just can't... agh! Satan wants Sam! Honestly, I can't believe that this show has gotten so crazy - the apocolypse? One brother who Satan wants as a vessel, and the other searching for God with an ousten angel? That is some crazy shit right there, but somehow they make it work. Swoon.

Flash Forward - LOVED the first episode. I do feel like this one has slowed down some though. Where is the new stuff? I was listening to the radio this morning and they were talking about how Ralph Fiennes is the most whiny leading man ever. He is kinda whiny. And John Cho doesn't want to do anything because why bother, he's going to die anyhow. UGH! Just man up and live whatever life is left! Anyhow, I still like it, but I kind of wonder if it's going to last if it keeps going at this pace.

Eastwick - I really wasn't sure about this one at first, but I find something compelling about it. What is it? I dunno. Maybe it's partly watching the town square scenes and thinking they are in Star's Hollow because it's the same set. There's just something about the whole story that keeps me coming back. Obviously, it's a totally girly show, it's fun to watch the friendship between the three main characters.

Cougar Town - This is the only new sitcom I kept watching. I like it, it's funny! I think Courtney Cox is pretty great. And I seriously love Ian Gomez as the neighbor/best friend's husband. He's hilarious! It's just a great cast, and I think it's well written.

Glee - My absolute favorite new show! It's got heartbreak, romance, humor and MUSIC! It's just awesome. If you haven't been watching it, give it a try. Jane Lynch is hysterical, as usual, and the kids in the Glee club are talented. It's just FUN to watch, but at the same time it has serious plots and breaks your heart a little. Just the way I like it. Joss Whedon's going to direct an episode later and I absolutely CAN'T WAIT!

Desperate Housewives - Can I just say I am SO GLAD that Mike chose Susan? Plus it left room for the crazy ex storyline, which I have been enjoying. I think this season has been pretty good so far.

The Office - Jim and Pam's wedding? Great. The horror of Michael & Pam's mom? Awesomely awful. Kevin accidentally getting Jim's credit card cancelled? Hysterical! It's great as always!

The Vampire Diaries - A new vampire show, of course I'm watching it! It's a little slow moving, and I AM left with the 'why spend your life in high school if you're immortal' question. Other than that, I am enjoying it. It's a campy, angsty teen vampire show.

The Cleveland Show - I wasn't sure if I was going to like it, but I think it's pretty funny. Also, the theme song is really catchy and I periodically find myself singing it around the house.

V - Watched the premiere of V and thought it was good! I didn't know that this was a remake. I was surprised at how much they gave away in the first episode, and I was so sad during the credits to see Alan Tudyk as a guest star because I was super happy to see him (love him! If you haven't seen 'Death at a Funeral', rent it immediately) and I knew he was not going to stick around. It'll be interesting to see if they can keep this momentum going. It's a total bummer they're only showing 4 episodes and then it's not back until spring, and I wonder if that's a wise choice.

Castle - I seriously love Castle. I seriously love Nathan Fillion. And this?

One of the best things I've seen on TV in a long time.

Those are just some of the shows I'm enjoying this season.

Along with the good came the not good enough. I watched one or two episodes of the following shows and decided they weren't worth it: Modern Family, Community, Mercy, Trauma.

What shows are your favorites? Which ones have you given up on?

Teen Angst

2009-11-09T00:34:00.001-08:00

Remember when I started that new series, Teen Angst, back in August? Then I didn't ever post again? Well, the baby sickness is calming down (thank the Lord!) and I'm back. So, here we go...

11-27-98 (18 years old)

I wanted to be alone. Actually my real feeling was that I desperately needed to be alone and I couldn't help that feeling. Stuarts* seemed like a good place to be alone. I'm sad. I don't know I guess it could be the holiday season upon us once again and I guess I can't help recalling how I was feeling last year at Christmastime. Right now I can feel that my self esteem is low and that I do not feel like my usual happy, giving self. It's like the best way to describe it is bummed but oh it seems much more profound** than just that. I've been having dreams about someone holding me in his arms. So, I've grown used to this gnawing loneliness that I've carried for so long but it seems that in the past couple of days it just can't stay down and it is gnawing at me. I want to cry so much I feel all bottled up inside and I'm not sure why. I feel awful about the whole situation with Garrett*** which perhaps in the future will seem trivial, but at this moment I only feel that what I did was wrong. Then there's Dad. I seriously am doubting that I'll be able to get time off to go back to Philly for Christmas. I don't' know how I feel about that. And no matter how much deep seeded anger I have in me for Dad, I still miss him and especially if I don't' go for Christmas that will be the longest time I've gone without seeing him. I can't help wising that he cared more.**** I guess that's all I ever wanted and it's just never happened. Is that so much to ask? I don't want to deal with anything and suddenly I feel I have to deal with everything all at once. I don't even see why all this matters, because what do our lives amount to if we are not happy? We just end up moping around taking up everybody else's space for no good reason. I don't really know what my motivation is right now. Don't get me wrong, this certainly isn't any kind of suicidal feeling. It's just some kind of profound unhappiness. I feel I'm just going through the motions and can't be sure where they're taking me next. Maybe I don't even care either. Okay, so let's be honest here. I know that the real reason I cam to Stuart's was because I was hoping I'd run into Garrett here. I mean, it is true I just wanted to be alone (or more accurately, left alone), but when he wasn't home when I called this morning all I could think about was seeing him. It's all I've been able to think about at least since yesterday morning. I don't even know if he's worth all of this thought or not. I almost wish I hadn't come on Monday night and hadn't seen K hanging all over him. I almost wish that I hadn't left that message on his answering machine. But wishing never got me anywhere, did it? If there was a god, if I knew what I believed, I would ask him to give me strength now, I'd rather not spend my time feeling this way or feeling that all I want more than anything is a sweet caress, is to be held and that my strong want (need) for this makes the joy of anything else acquired much dimmer in my heart. So where will I end up? Maybe I'll end up an unhappy overweight addicted to nicotine lonely single old woman. What do you think? I share my every thought with you, wish you were able to give me an answer, I am sure that you would know what would make me happy. And I am sure you would know how I could make myself a better person and to improve my life and the lives of those around me. I play the fool, falling too hard too soon, able to over analyze every situation I get into, every move that is made, every person I meet and every breath of air and word spoken by said person. Able to see life as a silhouette of happiness. Wishing for the shadows of my doubt to disappear. And when I look back at this journal entry will it just be one long cliche to me***** will I have been writing in clips and phrases of what I have already experienced? Or will I have been profound and poetic without even trying in this caffeine heightened state of awareness as my mind outruns my hand and I try to keep up my words turning into unintelligible scrawls? Remembering that writing is a rush for me, the adrenaline flowing through my veins tells me that I feel the words I put down and that there is nothing, nothing in this world that I would trade for a life of being able to write down my thoughts, my feelings and anything to evoke emotion and response in another person****** That there is no praise greater to me than to be praised for my writing as I say thank you with a cramp in my hand and a smile on my face. That there is no better feeling than to page through a book of my work and to know that these are my accomplishments and they belong to no one else but may be shared by all. And that I must let no negative thoughts, no negative feelings, no rejections and no reflections turn me away from this art that they call poetry or prose or some people call shit but I would never agree because these are my sentiments. And that this exercise of my mind has got my heart pounding, my blood flowing hot and my breath coming short as adrenaline pulls pulls pulls feelings and emotions from deep within me flowing down my tired arm into the ink that I guide onto the paper. Thinking of a famous authors thoughts on writing and wondering one day these will too be published on an anthology called authors of the 20th century discuss the art of writing******* or some such thing. And wondering if anyone in this friendly, awake coffee house has noticed my frantic scrawling and the change of my demeanor from sad to nothing but emotional flow a hard concentration and the movement of my lips to the words I am now writing. And if someone was to notice these things or the way I pause to take the knots out of my cramped hand would they wonder what I was writing about?

And that's how I feel.

* Stuart's was an amazingly awesome coffee shop that used to be in downtown Bellingham. It still exists in a different form in our Public Market, but it's not the same. It was my second home when I was 16-19, I hung out there constantly.

** Profound? Really? I like how many times I wrote profound in this entry.

*** Garrett was the guy who ran the weekly poetry night at Stuart's. I had a brief and strange sort of flingish relationship with him. It ended with us talking and me saying 'you play games', his reply 'i know', and my retort 'don't play games with me, or I won't be your friend'. I know he wouldn't mind me using his name here because he'd probably think this was pretty hysterical. I think I'm friends with him on My Space now.

**** I had a lot of issues with my relationship with my Dad, I rest assured now that he totally did care and I love him a lot.

***** Um, probably the cliche thing. Yeah.

****** I wanted to be a writer then, and I still do. If I could make a living off writing, it would be a dream for me.

******* Seriously? This drivel in some kind of anthology about thoughts on writing? No. Just. No.

I chose this one for several reasons. It's almost a perfect sample of something written at that time in my life. I wrote this 4 days after my 18th birthday. I love the embarrassing cliche of it (my favorites are in red), but I also love that even re-typing this I could feel that rush I used to get from writing. I write here because I still love the feeling I get when I am putting words down and something comes to me and makes me feel. I still share my writing because I want it to mean something, and I still want to write a book someday. I wrote this sitting in my favorite coffee shop, I used to go there several times a week and write in my journal, write poetry, and mingle with the other regulars. That was my culture then, it was me. I also see looking back many journal entries where I talk about being sad - I wish I'd known then about depression and that it didn't have to be that way. But I also love what I see here - this outlet I had where I started writing down and in true 'teen angst' and ended on a high, invigorated and ready to go on.

Pieces I Left Behind; Part 1

2009-11-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

9 years later, I awake one morning to memories of the heartbreakingly real dream you just appeared in.

It's so mysterious to me the way the mind works. I am happy and have a wonderful life. Yet in my dreams and sometimes in waking I see ghosts and I know that somewhere out there, lives go on without me, pieces of my heart I left behind trailing unnoticed in their shadows.

To say I miss you wouldn't be quite accurate. I Loved the time we spent together. The way you made me feel, the friendship and security and honesty of it all. I suppose my heart thinks it might somehow regain those feelings. But my mind knows that the likelihood of there being any place for you in my life now is slim.

You are a vagabond, perpetually moving and society's standards fit you like a wooly, uncomfortable cloak, trying to hang on and failing. I am a pregnant homemaker with a family and a certain future. If we met on the street as I've imagined time and time again, what would you even see in me aside from an overweight breeder you used to know when we were young? In the midst of my probably unrequited fondness for you, what would we even say?

But despite all this, I still dream about you. In my slumber I break your heart in an unavoidable choice between our friendship and my husband, who I know is my almost perfect mate. How arrogant to dream that I have broken you.

I still look, having glanced and seen you twice this year, my eyes scan for you every time I drive downtown. I look, despite knowing that if I saw you I wouldn't stop.

9 years later I carry you with me because I don't know how to let go, my subconscious holds on without explanation and I dream.

Best Laid Plans

2009-11-05T14:25:00.000-08:00

Should've and could've are words we don't use,
they only depress us and give us the blues.

My mom used to say that to me, and really? It bugged the crap out of me. It's cutesly and rhymes and it's a little annoying.

But...

Like many annoying things in life, it's also true. Part of the reason it's annoying if someone says it to you is because they're right about the fact that you'e holding on to something you should let go of. Regret isn't something I'm very fond of. I think it's a waste of time and that energy is much better spent looking forward, not back.

I had my second appointment with my midwife yesterday and it didn't exactly go as I had planned. She got my records from my endocrinologist and whatever was contained therein indicated to her that I have had high blood sugar levels. And if I have high blood sugars and/or am at isk for gestational diabetes, she can't treat me. If I have high sugars, I have to have a doctor and a hospital birth.

ARGH! First off, I have NOT had high sugars. I have been diagnosed with insulin resistance, but they've never had me monitor my sugars until now. I passed my glucose tolerance test during my last pregnancy without even having to do the 3 hour, and passed again when not pregnant. I specifically asked my endocrinologist after my bloodwok whethere I was at risk for diabetes because it was something I was really concerned about and one of my reasons for wanting to lose weight. She said that I'm not prediabetic or high risk for diabetes. As fa as I am/was aware, I was put on Metformin ONLY to treat PCOS and my irregular cycles, and it had nothing to do with my insulin levels. But it doesn't seem like that fact was noted in my chart.

At my last appointment at the endocrinologist, I met with her ARNP, and she is a diabetes specialist. I thought I was going in for a followup on my bloodwork and instead I was met with a plethora of information about gestational diabetes, a blood sugar monitor, and the distinct feeling that I was being told I was going to GET gestational diabetes for sure. It was fairly upsetting for me, I was unhappy because I didn't feel like it was a positive way to look at things, and I was fine through my last pregnancy. However, she never told me anything about how high my risk was for getting GD or why. Thinking about that, and after my appointment with the midwife yesterday, I find myself wondering if she even knew what that appointment was for, and whether the nurse and the endocrinologist are even talking, and whether I am misunderstanding something about my being teated with Metformin. I'm wondering what my chart says and if it's correct.

I hate being confused about my own medical care, and I think I deserve to have correct information about my treatment and what is happening to my body.

In the end, we scheduled another appointment for 2 weeks and my midwife is giong to call and clarify things with the endocrinologist and my primary care doctor. For now, I've started taking my sugars every morning, but I'm worried. The TARGET level for pregnancy is 95 fasting, ie when you first wake up in the morning. But the normal acceptable range is large, from about 80 to 130 depending on where you look. This morning I tested at 104. So... higher than the target, but not super high. It just sucks that even if my levels are OK, if they're not PERFECT my whole pregnancy and birth plan could change.

She also told me that it would be good if I didn't gain any weight. I've lost 10 pounds since I got pregnant, so it's okay to gain that back, but I'm worried that I'll gain too much weight and that will suck especially since I just lost 30 pounds. I would like to not gain that back during the pregnancy, but I'm already feeling stressed out about monitoring my diet carefully and trying to eat right when food aversions and cravings come and go.

I broke down after the appointment yesterday and cried. I feel betrayed and I found myself almost wishing I'd never been diagnosed with insulin resistance. Of course I realize that without all my diagnoses and treatment I probably would not have even gotten pregnant in the first place. But I'm annoyed that my body can't just cooperate. I've had myself really excited about how this birth experience would be and it's really hard thinking about never getting to experience the birth I really wanted.

Today it still sucks. But I know whatever happens, it will turn out okay and as long ast he baby is healthy that's what is really important. I'm trying to prepare myself for the possibility of letting go fo this particular dream and moving on to just loving and looking forward to my new little son or daughter. For now, it's just 'we'll see.'

P.S. Unisom? Best thing ever. I am still not feeling 100% but in the last week things have GREATLY improved and I've been throwing up once a day or NOT AT ALL! Woo! I'm still tired, but things are definitely improving.

P.P.S. The baby is doing fine, we heard the heartbeat. I can't wait to feel him/her moving around.

Reality Roundup: SYTYCD is back!

2009-10-28T11:37:00.000-07:00

Top Chef

After Restaurant Wars, Laurine was eliminated. Eh. Not too much of an opinion from me on this one. It was interesting watching a RW show where they didn't have to do decor or anything. I thought the fighting between Michael and Robyn was a little crazy. He is so intense. I am still rooting for Kevin all the way, I just love him!

Project Runway

SO glad Nikolas is GONE. I just could not stand him. I thought Milla Jovovich was such a fun guest judge! She gave actual useful critiques and then at the end when she said something to the judges about how she couldn't imagine doing that every week? Pretty cool to watch. Also, props for Michael & Nina back on the panel. Hopefully they'll be there more often.

So You Think You Can Dance

Adam Shankman breaking down during Billy's last solo? Hilariously awesome. Also, I always like the guys who basicay dance their solos in diapers. I'm bummed because I did read the news that Mia Michaels will not be choreographing for the show any longer. It's a bummer, her routines have been some of my favorites.

First thoughts on the top 20? What happened to Mia's hair. That was my first thought. Seriously. Whatever, she's the kind of person who does that. So. 3 tappers? Interesting. Early favorites? Nathan, Russell, Billy, Ellenore, Bianca, and Mollee.

I liked the showcase hour, especially the hip hop routine. First competition episode? What the hell Billy Bell is gone?! That is crazy and it sucks. And Noelle is out for this week and has to heal by next week? It just sucks, especially for Billy.

Quick thoughts on performances...

Channing and Phillip's Jive was okay. I like Jive, and loved her costume, but it wasn't that memorable for me.
Ashleigh & Jacob's broadway routine was good. I was more impressed with him than I was with her. Despite her sparkly dress, I felt like he caught the eye on this one.
Ariana & Peter pulled hip hop for their first week. I do love me some Italians from Philly. Loved the concept. Props to Peter on the head slide. The dance was pretty good, although I felt like their synchronization was off. Adam said they 'weren't dancing like each other' and I totally agree with that.
Russell & Noelle. I love Russell, he's one of my favorites. Russell danced his Fox Trot with Melanie Lapatin since Noelle was injured. I thought Russell was excellent!
Bianca & Victor pulled contemporary and Travis Wall is back as a choreographer. Love him. It was a great routine, but I wish the music had been different. The lyrics fit, but the song itself didn't do much for me.
Karen & Kevin get a ChaCha, nice for Karen. How FREAKING AWESOME was it that they canced to the version of Push It from Glee?! LOVE it! Karen looked great, Kevin? not so memorable.
Ellenore & Ryan puled contemporary jazz. I liked it much more than I thought I would! They danced so well, made it look easy and beautiful. It was pretty great.
Brandon & Pauline pull Smooth Waltz. Good luck... Brandon took Billy's place since his illness knocked him from the competition. And... it was beautiful. I was surprised. The judges were not so excited about it.
Legacy & Kathryn got Hip Hop. I thought they were really good! I totaly enjoyed it!
Mollee & Nathan were last with Disco. Interesting the two really youngin's got paired up. Hm. GREAT way to end teh performances! They were awesome. They looked great. The tricks were incredible. Loved it!

My favorite performances from the first show? As a couple, Mollee & Nathan and Legacy & Kathryn. Individually, Jacob, Russell and Karen. Least favorite? Bianca and Victor and Ariana and Peter.

I totally love Adam Shankman, and am thrilled that he's a regular judge now! Ariana, Brandon, Pauline and Russell ended up dancing for their lives. I was very disappointed about Russell. I love watching him dance, I have come to discover that I totaly love watching people Krump. Funny huh? In the end, the judges eliminated Ariana and Brandon were eliminated. What an emotional roller coaster for him. You're out, you're in, you're out. But, in the end I'm so glad Russell is still around. I need to see him do more.

Sick and Tired

2009-10-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

I thought maybe I'd get back on track with posting last week. Obviously, not so much...

The truth is, I sort of hate my life right now. Don't get me wrong - the big picture stuff is fine. The house is fine, we are all healthy, we're looking forward to the new baby. I can't wait until I can feel it move for the first time.

But...

Day to day? I am SO TIRED of being sick. Indescribably tired. At the end of last week I thought maybe things were starting to get better, but I had a fairly miserable weekend. I just felt like crap Saturday evening, and all day Sunday.

I've been throwing up a lot. I'm sure it could be worse, but for me finding myself hunched over the toilet three or four times a day is depressing. I constantly have this feeling in the back of my throat like I need to spit something out, but even hurling doesn't help.

I'm tired too. Physical activity makes me nauseous. I feel like a crappy mom because most days Sam and I just stay in the house and he doesn't get to play with other kids or go to the playground or anything that would be more fun for him. We watch way too much TV and spend way too much time playing computer games, because that's all I can handle right now.

Last night after throwing up for the fourth time and still feeling like crap, I sat on the couch and couldn't help crying. I feel so overwhelmed. I don't know how much longer I can take this. All I want to do is lie here, all I want to do is sleep, all I want to do is not have so much responsibility. All I want is to feel NORMAL again. I just don't want to be sick anymore.

My house is a mess, my kid isn't getting enough exercise, I'm having people over on Thursday to say goodbye to a friend that's moving and I don't know how I'm going to manage to get ready on time. Things are a little out of control, and I don't even have control over my own body and how I'm feeling. Even normal things like grocery shopping are somewhat of an ordeal, walking around the store with a cart for 30 or 45 minutes is enough to exhaust me and send me into the bathroom to vomit again. It's kind of depressing.

It was easier when I was pregnant with Sam, I didn't need to worry about the state of the house so much since we lived in a one bedroom condo and never had people over anyhow. I went to work, came home, rested, and went to bed early. I didn't have another person depending on me every day, and it's hard.

I know I'll get through it. Already I know that things have improved slightly from last week, and the week before. If I'm lucky, they'll continue to improve at a little bit faster pace. I'm 12 weeks now, and usually getting out of the first trimester means some improvement. I just wish that I could see the end or something. I wish I wasn't thinking about the fact that with Sam I was sick for 5 months.

So basically, I haven't been posting because this is all I have it in me to say. I am a sniveling, sick, whining, pathetic, tired, pregnant mess. Hopefully soon I'll have the energy to say something more interesting and worthwhile. In the meantime, I'm finally getting caught up on my reader and I am still here... just not so interesting for the time being.

It's Aliiiiiiiive!!

2009-10-22T19:27:00.000-07:00

Um, you guys? I am having a BABY!

Okay, I realize that I told you that a month and a half ago. But for some reason, this pregnancy has been weirdly different than the first. I have been acutely conscious of the fact that I'm pregnant. After all, the morning sickness was acutely real, and fairly crippling for the first month or so. But somehow, it just hasn't seemed real that I'm growing a baby.

This morning? I had my first real ultrasound. As in, the first ultrasound where we could see anything more than a little dot. And do you know what I saw? A BABY!

A baby. With hands. And feet. And a face. And a brain. And a tiny, beautiful, quickly beating heart. Moving, rolling, waving and kicking. I don't remember crying at any of my ultrasounds with my last pregnancy, but when I saw that baby in me today, saw it moving around like a real, living baby? Tears. I controlled it fine, though I'm sure if I'd given in and burst into tears the ultrasound tech wouldn't have blinked an eye. It must happen all the time. I didn't expect it, but I think this is the start of it being real.

So, meet Baby Heiner...

In case you need some help...S/he still looks a little like an alien...

And according to the baby sites, who are very fond of fruit analogies, baby is about the size of a fig.

They measured the little bean, and I'm now 11 weeks 4 days pregnant. My due date (plus/minus 2 days) is May 9. Mothers Day, 2010.

Amazing.

I went to Target today to buy another pair of comfy stretchy pants. Because somehow, even though you can't see any change yet, my jeans are too uncomfortable already. And... I just couldn't help myself, and this somehow came home with me...

Fig photo by The Scootabaker. Photo linked to source (Flickr).

The Blahs

2009-10-11T21:53:00.000-07:00

Hi. Yeah, I am still here. Sorry I haven't been around much lately, but it seems kind of depressing and boring to log on and write about how sick I've been and how much this part of pregnancy sucks. I have been so tired and nauseous and just felt bad a lot of the time, I haven't been getting time to get online, and by the time Sam's in bed at night I kind of want to be in MY bed! The good news is that this week was better than last week. Still somewhat miserable, but it comes and goes a little more - I've had several hours where I almost felt normal. So, I'm hoping that this time will be better than last time, and I won't be sick until after Christmas. I had my first midwife appointment and have an ultrasound on the 22nd at which they should finally be able to measure the bean and figure out a due date (I'm guessing around May 13).

Life has gone on and I have tons of stuff bouncing around in my head that would be great to write about. Sam and I are flying to New Jersey for 9 days tomorrow to visit my stepmom and little sis, maybe I'll get more time to write while I'm there.

Sorry for the unannounced hiatus, but trust me, you don't want to hear about much of what's been going on with me! Hope to be around more this week.

Lift them Up

2009-10-01T12:24:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I totally know today is not Friday yet, but this is going to be up until the weekend at least, and as I've sat here and wrote it, I realized I couldn't wait until tomorrow to put it up.

We all have struggles
in life, sometimes they seem to
have no end, no out

Lately I have had
some of my own, found myself
wishing for... something

Then I reach out, I
take in words and I wonder
how can it all be?

Now I try so hard,
my hardest, to push aside
thoughts of myself

I will sit, I will
pray, I will send anything
I think will help you

I will think of you,
I will spread the word, the world
needs love, needs it now

If you have a prayer
a positive thought, a bit
of good energy

If you have karma
to spare, virtual hugs to
send, now is the time

Now is the time, we
lift each other up, across
the miles we join

Wishing we could do
more, but hoping for now we
make some difference

I've been struggling lately. Between the swine flu invading my household, the ridiculous decision to try and adopt a 9 month old puppy (yeah, say I told you so, the adoption was never official & we couldn't handle him), morning sickness that has reacquainted me with the toilet in a forgotten way, not being able to eat, a house I'm too tired to clean, and pregnancy hormones making me slightly crazy? It's been... interesting. I've cried. I've sobbed. I've snapped at Sam. I've gotten to the end of my rope and wondered where there was to go.

But, I'm surviving. At the end of the day, Sam always falls asleep and watching him like that I can't help falling back in love with him no matter what happened that day. I can get through one day at a time and some days I feel a little better than others. My life has become a question to me. I don't know how we'll do this, I don't know how I'll get through the next 5 months if this sickness sticks around. I don't know how I'm going to handle an infant and a 4 year old. But I'll figure it out. I have my family, and I can't wait until the day I get to feel our new little baby move inside me! We have our ups and downs, but my heart is intact, in fact most days it swells with love and pride and wonder at least once.

I've been behind on my reading around the blogosphere, but I'm getting caught up. Unfortunately, as I catch up, I see that there are other women out there who are struggling too. Is it something in the air? I don't know. All I know is that I am moved to tears and find myself wishing there was something, anything, I could do to help ease their pain. I want to hold them in my arms, tell them that it's so hard right now, but I know it will eventually be okay. I want to cry with them, tell them that I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for what they're going through right now.

In this weird online world, we meet people without meeting them. Some of these women probably don't even know who I am. I read their blogs, I've been looking into their lives for a couple of years. I've laughed with them, I've cried with them. Some of them know me, and have reached out to me in my times of need. Some of them I admire for their strength, their humor, their writing, or their hearts. Sometimes it is hard to care so much about people you've never met. To be allowed into their pain in a way you're not allowed into people's lives sometimes.

With all of that though, the tears I've shed, the pain I feel for them... I wouldn't give it up. I love them. I love the support I've found. I love that there is a world where we can share these innermost scary thoughts, that we can purge ourselves. I love that we can share ourselves and know that we can find support. Today, I want you to support these women. I want you to click, to visit, to tell them anything. Whether it's a prayer you can offer, positive energy you can send their way, a virtual hug, or a word or two of comfort, it matters. They need you, in the same way that I've needed you and you've been there for me.

Audrey ~ If you've been around here, you've heard about Audrey before. She's one of my closest online friends, and an amazing and awesome woman. She has her struggles, but she has a big heart, and she's always been there for me. Auds has actually been having some more up times lately, but there are still struggles. Like Facebook jerks. Seriously people? In any case, she can use your love.

Janet ~ I think Janet is strong. If you read through her archives, you'll see the trials she's gone through, and she almost always handles it with a smile or a joke. She is funny, and she is fiercely in love with her kids. Her pride in them is pretty awesome. Well, sometimes things just get overwhelming. It happens to us all, right?

Mama Bee ~ Mama Bee is hilarious. She is one of the most hilarious women I read, and also somehow manages to title every blog post with a song title. So not something I can do. She's been sick. Real sick. Like me, except without the baby. Which is a whole second reason she should be lifted up. See, she wants another baby. But it hasn't been in the cards (yet). I know how hard that is, I remember the anger and the frustration and the want. So, just love her up, kay?

Adam ~ All right, so it might be true that Adam is not a lady. It also might be true that his life is going all right at this point. However, Adam has friends. Friends he loves fiercely who happen to be having some hard times. So, why is he on this list? Because in reading his post today, I was reminded that sometimes, supports need supports too. Because I think you should read his blog. At first, you'll probably be impressed because it's kinda funny and witty and if you're like me, sarcasm is alwaysa plus. Then after a while, you'll realize that this guy is kinda awesome, and that the kind of friendship he offers to those he cares about is pretty cool, and maybe you'll be happy he's a part of our community and want to tell him so.

Casey ~ I love Casey. She probably doesn't know me, but she is one of my favorite lady bloggers. She is adorable, she is faithful, she is an amazing photographer and she's funny. I hope that I'll be able to meet her one day. Right now, she's going through hard times. I don't know all the details, but I know she is struggling. I know that she is amazing and supportive, and right now she needs to be lifted up.

Britt ~ Britt is the one who really inspired this post. Just read this. It will absolutely take your breath away, and if you don't want to just sweep Britt away and hug her tight and take away her pain, I will eat my shirt. She is a strong woman, she is amazing, but right now she is going through something unthinkable. Even without the details, I cry when I think of her. I know that right now, it's hard for her to see the future, it's hard for her to see that there will be light and love and wonder and things will be okay, someday. So, we need to keep reminding her that she's not alone, that there is love out here, and that she will make it.

That's all for now. Do you know someone who needs a lift? Leave it in the comments. Even if it's you. And thanks for being part of this weird, wonderful little world inside my computer.

Bits & Pieces: Project Runway and Top Chef

2009-09-25T17:43:00.000-07:00

So, I basically decided to stop writing my PR & TC full recaps. Why? Because there are people out there who write them better, and I just can't wait to watch the shows until I feel like sitting and taking notes - I NEEDS MY FIX. So, here are some thoughts on the last couple episodes, because I can't just give it up all together.

Project Runway: Costume Challenge

I LOVED this challenge, so much fun! My absolute favorite design was Epperson's western look. It totally reminded me of Firefly/Serenity. I have not always liked his designs, but loved this one. I was a bit bummed that Nicolas won because I just can't stand him, and he now has immunity for next week. He just grates on my nerves! I have been disappointed about Gordana because her garments the past couple weeks have been amazingly put together and well made, but she's just not reaching that place she needs to be in. I hope she can step it up to avoid being eliminated. I was really sad that Ramon got eliminated. It just sucks that he got sent home on a mistake like this, I would have liked to see more of him. I guess that's just the way the fabric flutters.

Project Runway: Newspaper Challenge

Obviously. I mean, really? When they all thought it would have something to do with b&w film it's kine of like... have you SEEN this show? I LOVED Christopher's dress, the feather skirt was absolutely awesome. I was definitely not sad to see Johnny go, I just wasn't getting much from him. I thought Gordana's dress was really pretty, like they said you wouldn't have known it was paper. I was disappointed that they knocked it for being "too wearable" because I feel like that could have just been part of the challenge.

Top Chef: Deconstruction Challenge

I am just gonna go right ahead and say it - I think deconstructed food's a little weird. Whatevs. I was surprised when Robin won the quickfire challenge, her dish was very simple, but I suppose it was good. Mike's Caesar Salad was brilliant - it looked just like something that you'd see in a fine dining restaurant, and I thought it was beautifully presented. I thought it was hilarious that Jennifer was so not confident, and then ended up in the top three. I am totally rooting for Kevin though, I was happy to see him win and he's my favorite at this point. I was sad to see Ron go, this seemed to be the second time that he really maybe didn't quite grasp the point of the challenge, I feel like maybe he didn't reallly understand what 'deconstructed' meant or something. At the same time, the other chefs were trying to help him and it just didn't work out. By the way, if your'e a Top Chef fan, I would ABSOLUTELY recommend going to the Bravo website and reading Tom Colicchio's blog. He writes his own explanation and behind-the-scenes after ever episode and it's awesome to read his thoughts and have him break down the dishes from behind the judges table.

Top Chef: Ranch Challenge

I have NEVER seen Tom Colicchio spit out food, it was horrifying and awesome all at the same time. I can't believe Robin served bad prawns, but Mattin was sent home for mediocre food. Oh well.

So, those are my thoughts. I'll post little things like this weekly most likely so I can get out the big juicy stuff I need to say! How have you been enjoying this season? Who are your favorites?

Defeat

2009-09-24T11:22:00.001-07:00

"You should just go up and lie down. He'll freak out, but I'll take care of him."

It is 11:00 on Thursday morning, four days in to the swine flu breakout in our household. In a way today has been the worst even though Sam doesn't have a fever like he did before, he's out of sorts to the extreme, whining and clinging and not really knowing what he needs or wants.

"It's not going to help, I just feel sick but it's not flu..."

"I know," he says, "but Sam has been clinging to you for three days. Take the laptop and go rest, I'll deal with Sam."

I sit and think. Sam is lying on my chest with his head on my shoulder. He wants me to pick him up, but between the nausea and how big he's gotten, I just can't carry him around like I used to. I sit on the floor as I channel surf, trying to find SOMETHING that he'll be happy with, but to every channel he just says 'no, not this.'

As my husband urges me to go, I feel tears come to my eyes. I know he's right, but I feel weak. I should be able to take care of my son. I should be able to handle this 'morning' sickness, it could be worse. I should be able to give Sam what he needs. I feel tears slipping out and I feel like a baby.

Sam whines, and I accept defeat. I set him on the floor gently as he protests, I pick up the laptop and cord and head for the stairs as he starts to whine. I crawl into bed and feel it all overwhelm me. As I turn towards the wall and cry, I can hear him crying downstairs. I know he is asking for me. I hear Justin tell him that he knows he wants me, but it's just not going to happen right now.

As I sit up to write, to try and purge myself of some of this wrenching doubt, my tears are alone. Just like Justin said, Sam is not crying. I know that he can take care of him, but what mother doesn't feel an overwhelming need to give, give, give, especially when their child is sick?

I don't know how to do this. Last time I was pregnant, I felt bad for almost 5 months. But I didn't have to do anything. I dragged myself to work, ate saltines all day, went home for a few hours and slept a lot. There were not other committments. This time, I found myself hoping that I was sick with the flu and that this wasn't just the onset of morning sickness. After a few days of no other symptoms, I have to face it. This may be how I feel for the next several months, and I just don't know how to be okay with that. How am I going to be a good Mom to Sam when all I want to do is lie on the couch eating saltines and Cheerios and drifting in and out of sleep? How am I going to be able to attend playdates and play at playgrounds when too much physical activity just makes it that much worse?

Beyond any of this, how is it going to be for Sam when the baby comes? I know that in the end, it will be great. Siblings are wonderful, and I hope they'll grow to love each other with the amazing power that only exists between sisters and brothers. But it's going to be hard at first, Iknow that. He's not going to understand, and I worry about making sure he doesn't feel left out, that we still set aside Sam time for him.

Justin is right. Sam has been clinging to me for the past three days. I've barely had a moment to myself. He has slept next to me, napped on top of me, eaten in my lap. I haven't had a shower. I slept on the floor for two nights because Sam was in and out of sleep and then throwing up and I didn't want him in the bed. He's fallen asleep with his arms around my neck as I try to position myself so that his touch on my throat didn't make me want to vomit. He loves me fiercely, but sometimes I need it to subside.

For now, I sit. I hear him babbling downstairs, and I know I need to work, I have articles to write. But what can I do but let myself rest, just for a moment? I know that I need to let these tears fall, unbottle my fears and let the unsurety wash over me. I know it's okay. But somehow, knowing isn't enough, and I feel right now like I'm lost.

I WILL be okay. Eventually...

Seriously

2009-09-22T20:40:00.000-07:00

Dear Dad at Playground,

I am sorry I told my son to let "him" have a turn in reference to your daughter. I do not know if it upset her. Perhaps you should consider NOT letting your six year old girl with a very short haircut run around a playground with no shoes or shirt and only black pants. I didn't realize she was a girl until I later saw her pink sparkly shoes by the edge of the playground. Actually, in addition, perhaps just don't let your five and six year old girls run around the playground without shirts. It's just weird.

Thanks,
A Mom who thinks clothes in public are important

*****

Dear "banal,"

I hate you. You are one of the worst words I have ever heard. I hope that you and "chutney" jump off a cliff and die.

Sincerely,
Lover of "plethora"

*****

Dear Tyra,

I love ANTM as much as the next guy, okay? In fact, I look forward to it every season. But it's empty fluff, you do realize that right? I get that you are trying to do something different by having only models under 5'7" this season, but I seriously hope that you are not so delusional you really think you are going to "revolutionize the modeling industry" somehow. Have any of the previous winners made any impact on the modeling industry? I doubt it. It pretty much just adds "girls my height don't get the opportunity" blah blah blah. Here's an idea. How about you do a season with girls over size 14? That might actually make some kind of impression... at least on the tweens who are watching.

Sincerely,
I love you - but, really?

*****

Dear Swine Flu,

I HATE YOU. I REALLY HATE YOU. I hate the sound of my husband coughing up your phlegm. I also hate the 104 degree fever you have burning up my son, because I REALLY hate holding him down to force medicine down his throat. You totally suck. Please leave.

Sincerely,
Hoping I'm not next

*****

Dear Tiny Baby,

Dude. I know you are only 7 weeks old, but I think maybe you are starting to make me sick. I totally love you, but I have spent the last several days wondering if I am sick like the rest of my family (see above) or if this is that start of a horrifyingly miserable 5 months. Please don't be offended if I say something mean to you about how I wish you would stop making me sick. I love you, and I don't mean it. All will be forgotten.

Love,
Yo Mama

*****

Dear Strider/Puckett,

Oh, I see how it is. Now that you have been here for a week you are feeling comfortable enough to get a tuna can off the counter and lick it and pee on my bed. That better never happen again. Seriously. I am not afraid to use the crate. You are lucky you're cute. And new.

Seriously,
Yo Mama

Supernatural is Back!

2009-09-16T12:58:00.000-07:00

SPOILERS

How happy am I that Supernatural is one of the first shows to come back?! Ahhhhh! The Dean. The Sam. The happy Rachael. I quite enjoyed the scene at Chuck's house where Dean proceded to call Zachariah an ass-hat, told him to "stuff it with walnuts" then called him a "two-faced douche." Soon thereafter he asked Sam "you jonesin' for a bit of bitch blood or what?" LOL.

I hated hearing Bobby tell Sam it was all his fault and that if they pulled it off he basically never wanted to see/talk to him again. You know what I hated even more? Flipping DEMON BOBBY. No. Just... no. But how freaking awesome was it that he overcame the demon? And I'm so glad he didn't die. Later, hearing Dean talk about how much Sam let him down. Worse. Like, tearworthy worse.

And Oh my God, that scene with the man and the crib and the blood? How fucking horrible was that? I don't know if it's my pregnant hormones or what, but I swear I almost cried like five times during this episode. Then... Dean IS the sword of Michael the Archangel? I absolutely love the mythology of this show.

Final thought: Why is Jacob from LOST Lucifer? And does that sort of blow anyone else's mind?

Fall TV - What I'm Watching

2009-09-16T00:34:00.000-07:00

So, I'm way too tired tonight to write anything about my opinions or which new shows I'm most excited about, but I just finished my ~~obsessive compulsive~~ awesome chart(s) of what I'll be watching this fall. First I've got it by day of the week, then by premiere date so I can make sure I'm catching them for the DVR as they premiere. Yes, I am crazy. It adds up to about 37 hours of TV a week. I know some people may consider that a life sucking enormous waste of time, but we love TV, and we love our shows. I still get outside a lot, I still read, I still volunteer, I still walk the dog (well, soon anyway!). So who gives a rip? I would like to also mention here Mama Bee and her blog Tivo Junkie. Why? Because she is just about the only other person I know who watches as much TV as I do. Also, I totally don't watch The Bachelor or The Bachelorette but I like to read Bee's recaps because they are funnier than hell.

Anyhow, here is a quick peek at what I will be watching - more info/opinions etc. to come later!

Good Afternoon! Care for a bullet point?

2009-09-15T12:24:00.000-07:00

I have about 3000 things floating around in my head right now, and I need to get some of them out! I am hoping to get back into the swing of things and should be posting more regularly from here on, we've had a busy couple weeks but things are calming down now and I see free time in my future (what??). So, here is some.... stuff...

We met a dog! His name is Strider and he's a Rottweiler/Lab/Setter mix. He has Rotty coloring, lab size, and setter hair. He's really pretty. He is only 9 months old, which is a little younger than I was thinking of, but he's got some good obedience foundations already, and I think he'll make a really good family dog. He'll be coming to our house sometime this week to stay for a couple of days and see how he does. Hopefully, he'll do well and we'll be able to adopt. If not, the Alternative Humane Society has some other very nice dogs we can look into.
Tomorrow I'm meeting a midwife! I'm so excited, her name is Winni and she has been practicing in Bellingham since 1980. I have heard good things about her and am very excited because I'm really looking forward to making this birth experience everything I know it can be. I am scared, but at the same time super excited about experiencing things I didn't last time.
I also have an appointment tomorrow with my doctor for another ultrasound. If everything is as it should be, I will be about 6.5 weeks and we'll be able to see the little flicker of the baby in there. I'm hoping we'll also see that the fluid that was in there last week is gone, I think it's been working it's way out and it's tapered off, so fingers crossed!
My Dad has been in town since Saturday night and today we're going to go walk around Bellingham and go out to dinner at La Fiamma for pizza. It's been really great, and Sam is having tons of fun with his Grandpa Bill! It's wonderful because they have not spent that much time together, but Sam thinks he is great anyhow. It's been so fun watching them interact.
Sam has an appointment on October 2 for a screening for Mt. Baker Preschool. We'll see how that goes and then if they want to they'll schedule an assessment for Sam to see if he qualifies for their preschool program. If that doesn't work out, there is a really good preschool right around teh corner from my Mom's house that I'm hoping to get him into. Either way, some sort of preschool is in his very near future!
This weekend is the Portland Pirate Festival, so we'll probably head down there to participate in the festivities as we do every year. We usually go to the zoo as well, and I'm hoping to squeeze in a short visit to see my friend Xotchil, who is extremely pregnant and may even have a baby by then!
I got to do a little bit of writing last week. I was doing a fair amount of ghostwriting for a while there, but business has slowed down a lot. I'm hoping maybe towards the holidays things will pick up more and I'll be able to do more writing. I had a good time getting back into it and writing a couple articles last week, and it's nice to be able to earn some money doing something I really like!
I can't believe fall TV shows are starting up, and I'm not even ready with my list of premiere dates - agh! Tomorrow Sam will be at the babysitter so I'll finally have time to read through one of my favorite EW issues of the year - FALL TV PREVIEW! I'll be sure to post about what I'm looking forward to most!
I'm hoping to fly to New Jersey next month with Sam and my sister to visit our stepmom and little sister, but I have to wait until Justin gets paid again to buy the tickets. It will be really nice to see them, and I can't wait for them to hear how much Sam talks now!

Well, it sounds like Dad is out of the shower, so I'm gonna go get ready to go so we can explore the town a little bit. It's turned out to be a nice day for a walk, so we should have a good time!

I'm a little behind on my feed reader, but trying to catch up. How was your weekend?

Top Chef Las Vegas - Week 4: Singing for the Beatles

2009-09-10T12:04:00.000-07:00

The show starts out with Mike the Man still talking about how he shouldn't have been in the bottom and thinks there is only one step to the top. Robin want the girls to step it up and rock it!

The chefs head off to Daniel Boulud's restaurant at a hotel. Eli calls him a "bad motherfucker" and Tom pulls out a snail. Jennifer says "I think that whoever thought that a snail looked good to eat had to be really fucking hungry." I have to agree there!

Quickfire Challenge

Create a dish using escargot as the main protein in 45 minutes.

Daniel Boulud says he expects something he has not had before, and Tom announces it's a high stakes quickfire, and that the loser of this quickfire will be eliminated. Jennifer is nervous, but the good news is that I would guess that many of the chefs don't have much experience cooking with snails, so they will be in the same boat.

The chefs are understandably nervous, cooking French food for one of the best chefs in the industry today. Mike theMan does have experience cooking with snails. Kevin points out that one challenge with snails is they don't tase like much, so you have to figure out how to give them good flavor. Mattin definitely has an advantage with this dish since he's from France. It's also pressure though, if his dish isn't good, he has less of an excuse.

The judges say nothing about Ron's dish, say Jennifer's is good, and call Jesse's "interesting." They like Laurine's dish, Hector's presentation was very pretty, but no feedback, and Robin's seems to pass. Nothing about Mattin's, Ashley's is also called "interesting" and Kevin's seems fairly well received. Bryan's dish looks very pretty with the red wine risotto and Michael V's dish is also "interesting" as is Mike the Man's. It was very hard to tell what they liked!

Tom seemed impressed by the chefs creations, and Daniel announces the favorites - Mike the Man, Kevin, and Jennifer. Kevin wins the challenge with his bacon jam! At this point, Kevin is definitely one of my favorites, and I'm rooting for him. The three weakest were Jesse, Ashley & Robin. Instead of eliminating them right off, they get a second chance by cooking head to head.

Sudden Death Quickfire: Jesse, Ashley & Robin have 20 minutes to make one amuse bouche from anything in the kitchen to save themselves from elimination. One will be eliminated.

Ashley is not feeling confident, Robin doesn't have much experience actually cooking amuse bouche and Jesse seems fairly confident. They present their dishes to the judges, Robin did an avocado soup with crab, Jesse did a tuna tartare and Ashley presents foie gras with pineapple. All three dishes were good, but in the end Jesse's one bite sends her home. I was a little sad to see her go because I feel like she really struggled to show herself and her potential.

Elimination

Chefs will work in teams of two to create a six course meal using the proteins and sauces they drew on their knives.

The chefs draw knives, except for Kevin. The knives have the names of either a classic French sauce or a traditional French protein. Mike the Man is stressed by the French food. Mattin feels that he has an advantage, which he probably does. They will be serving food to some of the best French chefs in the world. These are very famous chefs, mentors to the judges, and Michael V says this could be the most important dish of his career.

Since Kevin won the quickfire, not only will he not be cooking, he will be joining the amazing chefs for dinner. What an awesome prize! If nothing else, this makes being on the show worth it no matter what happens to Kevin after this.

The chefs talk and pair up, Jennifer & Michael V pair up, and I'm rooting for them. Ashley scores and gets paired with Mattin. Ashley is definitely following his lead. In the grocery store, it was already obvious that Ron and Robin may have some issues working together.

The chefs return to the Top Chef kitchen to prep for 2 hours, they'll have 1 hour the next day to cook their dishes. Ron has lots of experience with frog legs, so he was lucky to draw that. Ron is quiet and Robin is just talking, talking, talking. Ron says she is all over the place, but thinks maybe they make a good pair since he's so quiet.

The chefs are tense, as Kevin says, "You're literally serving your life's work to the people who inspired it from the beginning." They head to the MGM Grand to Joel Robuchon to cook their dishes. This is overwhelming celebrity. Eli is excited to see Chef Robuchon since he "was pretty much under the impression that he didn't actually exist, and that he might be a unicorn."

Ron starts to get freaked out because Robin is making the sauce and putting together a salad at the same time and he's worried she may lose track of the sauce. Michael V says "cooking for these guys is like a singer having to sing for the Beatles."

hector's steak is not heating to the temerature it needs to be, with only 15 minutes to go. The chefs appear and sit around the table and Kevin looks dashing in his light suit. Robin and Ron's greens are wilting under the heat lamps.

Padma looks gorgeous in her light yellow dress as she introduces the diners for the evening: guest judge Daniel Boulud, Hubert Keller chef and owner of Fleur De Lys, Jean Joho chef and proprieter of Everest & Eiffel Tower restaurants, Laurent Tourondel chef and owner of BLT restaurants, Tom, Gail, Kevin, Emmanuel (translator) and Joel Robuchon billed only as chef of the century.

Ron & Robin introduce their Frog Legs Meuniere as the first course. Mike the Man and Bryan are up next with Trout and a deconstructed Bearnaise. Mike is convinced they are going to win, and the chefs like it - simple but sophisticated. Robuchon liked it a lot. Eli and Laurine are next with lobster and sauce americaine. Unfortunately Laurien's fears come to pass when the lobster is a little tough. Mattin and Ashley present their chicken with sauce veloute. Robuchon calls the sauce bland and another chef says they worked really hard for not a good result. The bacon overpowered the flavor, and Tom says that this is the exception to the rule that "everything is better with bacon." Jennifer and Michael are next with their rabbit chasseur. The rabbit is cooked perfectly, and the chefs enjoy it. Hector and Ash are last with their steak. Ash is not confident because there is not enough sauce ont he plates. Their dish is steak with chateaubriand and potatoes. The chefs notice the lack of sauce right away, which is a problem since that is one main element of the dish. The steak is cooked unevenly. Gail's meat is overcooked and the cut job looks like "it's been hacked with an axe."

Overall, Robuchon is impressed by the cooking of these young chefs. Gail points out that these chefs were able to do this dinner before they ever would have been able to at this point in another season.

Judges Table

Kevin enters the "waiting room" and gets questioned. He doesn't want to answer about favorites, but says that the chefs were happy with the end results. Padma appears and calls out Bryan, Mike the Man, Michael & Jennifer. Padma congratulates them for having the top two dishes at the meal. The chefs are full of compliments for each other, and Daniel announces that the winner is Bryan. As the winner, he gets to go to Robuchon's Vegas restaurant and work for a week.

They winners return and send back Mattin, Ashley, Hector & Ash. Poor Mattin. It sucks to be in the bottom, but for him to be in the bottom for this particular challenge must have felt pretty crappy. They thought the sauce was gravy like and that there was too much bacon, Mattin says he didn't shoot down the asparagus sauce, but he really did when they were in the store. Padma asks Hector & Ash were the sauce was. The steak not being done was the main issue for them, it caused the quick cutting and the sauce issue.

In the end, Hector's steak gets him sent home.

Next week: Cookin' in the desert, and Tom spits someone's food out (bad!).

Pregnancy: Allowing Women to Finally Have a Sac

2009-09-09T00:34:00.000-07:00

Quick update...

Well, I'm no longer the only person in my house who doesn't have a sac. Ha. Went to the doc today and had an ultrasound and bloodwork. I am a little less than 6 weeks, so we could see the sac but no baby yet. There is some fluid in my uterus, which could explain the spotting. She said it will either make it's way out or be absorbed into my body again. I have an appointment next Wed to go back for another ultrasound, and by that time if everything is progressing as it should be, we'll be able to see that little tiny flickering baby bean!

I also had blood drawn and go back Thurs for a second HCG level, basically it's supposed to double over a certain amount of time, so if today's numbers are all right, then the numbers on Thurs double it, all is well. If the levels decrease, it's not good news.

I feel nothing but optimistic at this point, and maybe it's starting to sink in. But not really. I think that after I get my bloodwork numbers back and then have the 2nd ultrasound it will really be REAL and exciting for me.

On another note, I've noticed that physical activity makes me nauseous. It's like a fat person's dream haha. Kind of. Except you can't eat. Hm. In any case, I've had coming and going bouts of nausea, and am expecting more of the same. Thanks so much to everyone for the well wishes and congratulations! I'm off to watch some TV before I pass out for the night!

P.S. It's 9/9/09. That's kinda cool.

Project Runway LA - Week 3: "Ladies & Gentlemen, capital W.T.F.?"

2009-09-08T20:40:00.000-07:00

This week, the show starts out with Ra'mon talking about how one decision being the factor that can send him home is scary. Mitchell is frustrated he was in the bottom three again and says he needs to keep working. I'd say that's a valid assessment.

The designers are told they'll be going on another field trip and they should not "forget their sunscreen." Christopher is seeing the ocean for the first time (!) and Tim Gunn is on the beach in flip flops and a blazer. Pretty funny.

Challenge: Create a fun and fashionable surfwear look.

I think this will be an interesting challenge because there is a potential here for someone to REALLY not get it, and get way off the mark. Tim then announces they'll be working in teams of two. Since she won last week, Shirin is allowed to choose first, but half the people are eliminated as they become team leaders. Shirin chooses to work with Carol Hannah, Logan & Christopher pair up, then Nicolas & Gordana, Mitchell & Ra'mon, Althea & Louise, Qristyl & Epperson and Jonny and Irina.

They are given 20 minutes to plan and choose a model between their two. Louise points out that the surfer girls like functionality over fashion. Ra'mon is not too happy that Mitchell chose him, he feels like he needs to take over the team to save them basically. Qristyl is bristling at Epperson acting like a teacher to her student when she's the team leader. I can tell already this is going to be fun...

They are only given 15 minutes to shop in Mood - collective GASP! Epperson & Qristyl clash in the fabric store and the designers are running around like headless chickens. Mitchell straight up calls Ra'mon's choices ugly and makes a grimace at the camera.

Irina and Jonny are going for "bohemian chic," and Nicolas & Gordana are doing something strange with strips of fabric. Huh? Hombre of Macrame? I don't even know what he was talking about. Epperson doesn't like Qristyl's fabric and thinks there is tension because they are "fearful of what may happen."

Mitchell actually says to Ra'mon: "In our relationship, I can't always tell you that you're perfect." WTF? Are they designing something or moving in together?? Clash-tastic.

Surprise Challenge: Tim comes in and lets the designers know they are raising the stakes - each team must create a SECOND LOOK. Ra'mon says: "Ladies and Gentlemen, capital W.T.F." The second look must be an avante garde look that corresponds to the California surfwear inspired design.

They get a $200 additional budget, but Tim says only one team member is allowed to go to Mood while the other works. Qristyl still doesn't feel like the captain and feels personally insulted by Epperson trying to take over the team.

I was surprised to see Ra'mon at the store, and Epperson. Perhaps because the others didn't trust them to stay behind and work? I dunno. Back at the design space, Mitchell admits that he has big ideas but is technically in trouble. What else is new anyhow? I feel like Mitchell just can't last.

Honestly? I would not have wanted to be working with Epperson. Ugh. He just rubbed me the wrong way with his sort of hippy talk about how they needed to understand each other.

Tim reappears and tells Carol Hannah that her model is not going to be there for the fitting, and asks if she wants to stay with the model or not. Carol Hannah can't deal and decides to switch models, so Carol's original model will be going home. Oh well, too bad for her. She chose to do a commercial opportunity instead.

The models come in for their fittings. Gordana seems totally not on board with the avante garde risque look that Nicolas has designed. Mitchell and Ra'mon are still not getting along. I hate to choose sides, but Mitchell is annoying me right now, and I like Ra'mon. That Garnier guy plugs some 'wonder waves' product then Tim comes to check in.

Jonny thinks avante garde means "as out of control as possible" and I wonder how that will work out for them. Tim loves their idea in theory, so we'll see how it goes. Tim did not like the peel off of Qristyl's look and tells Shirin they have a lot of work to do. Tim points at Mitchell & Ra'mon's avante garde look and says "What. Is. That.?" and he doesn't get it, nor does he get how the two looks relate. Doesn't look good for Mitchell & Ra'mon this week.

Mitchell & Ra'mon decide in the eleventh hour that they need to scrap the jumpsuit thing. Mitchell doesn't really get what Ra'mon is doing. Epperson & Qristyl argue some more.

A new day dawns, and Mitchell continues to annoy me. Urgh. Qristyl is nervous because she thinks two people are going to be eliminated. Ra'mon thinks it's unfair that he's doing so much work and trying to keep Mitchell focused. It really isn't fair - he drew a bad straw. I hope he can pull it together.

With 35 minutes left, Ra'mon is trying to dye some fabric. Ra'mon is struggling to get something together so they aren't disqualified for not having both models looks done. How frustrating.

The time has come, and Qristyl and Epperson are both ready to throw each other under the bus and "save themselves." Finally, it's the runway and guest judge Max Azria is in for Michael Kok, Rachel Bilson is the other guest judge.

We first see Qristyl and Epperson's beach look. I think it's really pretty. Their avante garde look I didn't get. And the models butt was totally hanging out. Irina & Jonny's first outfit comes out and I just didn't really get it. The avante garde look was okay, but really I didn't like the pair. Mitchell & Ra'mon's beachwear look is very pretty and flowy. The avante garde piece, I wasn't sure about. It's hard for me to judge those ones and well because sometimes avante garde can be so weird and I'm just not sure HOW I'm supposed to judge it, on what criteria. Definitely not on whether I'd wear it. Shirin and Carol Hannah's bathing suit coverup combo was gorgeous, and I thought their avante garde look was very pretty and it looked like something you'd see on the runway. I absolutely loved the colors. Althea & Lousie are next, their surfwear look definitely looks cute and beacy. Their avante garde look is really fun and looks well made. Nicolas and Gordana's outfit comes out and I hate the wraparound pants. Their avante garde look? Ew. It looked like some sort of weird futuristic alien thing. Logan & Christopher's surfwear look looks old to me. Or cheap. Whatever, I can't see a surfer girl wearing it. Their avante gard look was not bad, definitely looked like effort was put into it.

The low scoring teams are Gordana & Nicolas and Epperson & Qristyl. Jonny & Irina are in the top two teams. Their project was centered around macrame. Their surfwear look was Rachel's favorite. Mitchell & Ra'mon are also in the top two. Ra'mon begins to talk about how he was inspired by beautiful seaweed washing up on the beach, and Heidi totally thinks the same thing I do - "wait, is Mitchell the team leader here?" Mitchell has to admit that Ra'mon did most of the work. Mitchell says he did the swimsuit, and Ra'mon confesses that he was working on both pieces at the end. Mitchell admits that Ra'mon did pretty much all the work. Despite the fact they were in the top two, I wish that Mitchell could be sent home here.

Qristyl and Epperson come back, and Qristyl says that she thinks Epperson took the lead. Epperson talks to Qristyl instead of the judges and they begin to argue on the runway. RAWR. Heidi is clearly impressed. As are the other designers. Nina says of their avante garde look "what IS this?" Nicolas and Gordana are next. Heidi thinks the macrame is pretty but the bottom is really messy. As for the avante garde look, Heidi says "it isn't classy" and Nina says it's too sexy. Max says this work is not good.

Max says that Qristyl is weak and Epperson took advantage.

In the end, the win goes to Ra'mon. Mitchell stands there looking sad. They send Ramon, Jonny & Irina off, but keep Mitchell there with Qristyl and Epperson. Scary! They announce that Epperson is in, and Qristyl and Mitchell are left standing there. In the end, it's "three strikes and you're out" for Mitchell.

Next week: Prom?

The Story

2009-09-08T00:34:00.000-07:00

So, when we were trying to get pregnant with Sam, it took 2 years. 18 months of Clomid, lots of ovulation predictor kits, shots, four artificial inseminations and giving up. That's right, when I finally got pregnant with Sam I was SURE I was NEVER going to get pregnant - we had started saving up for adoption.

We started trying to have another one when Sam was about 18 months. My PCOS was incredibly over-stimulated by drugs, which knocked us out of the game for a few months because my ovaries were having a giant party, and not in a good way. We did one round of IUI right before Justin was diagnosed with Celiac. After that, we had to take a break for him to get healthy and we didn't have the money to do anything having to do with fertility treatments.

At the end of last year, I finally saw a new doctor an endocrinologist, and was diagnosed with a myriad of things. I got put on thyroid meds, and in February I started Weight Watchers. Justin and I talked about it and decided that I would focus on my health for a while. Living in our old house, we started to wonder if we'd have another one at all. I always wanted two, but I was starting to think about what it would be like to just have one. I came to the conclusion that if I got pregnant (we haven't used protection in over 5 years) it would be okay, but we weren't going to try and it would be okay if we just had Sam.

About 3 months ago, I went to the endocrinologist again and told her I wanted to do Metformin to treat the PCOS. The main reason I wanted to do it was to regulate my cycles (sorry dudes, but it's a part of the story), because well, they can be a freaking pain when they are out of whack. The doctor reminded me that Metformin can affect fertility. I came home and told Justin that in the next 6 weeks we would have to make some kind of decision about whether we were going to use birth control. We never really made a decision.

When we moved to the new house at the beginning of July, I realized howmuch more relaxed I felt and how stressed I'd felt living at the other house. I started to feel like I did want another baby. It was not the same as the first time, no longings, no desperation, just a small feeling that maybe it would be nice. We talked about it a few weeks later, and decided we wouldn't try - no ovulation predictor kits, no temperature charting, but we'd continue to 'not prevent' and whatever happened would happen.

On Saturday, we were down in Seattle at my friend Violet's. I'd gone to the Pacific Science Center with her and some other friends Friday and it had exhausted me SO much. Saturday afternoon I passed out cold on her couch. In the middle of the day. With four kids playing around me. I thought that was pretty weird. By the time we got back up to Bellingham, I had decided I wanted to take a pregnancy test. Not because I thought I was pregnant, but rather to remind myself that I was NOT pregnant so I could just stop thinking about it. I fell asleep that night at 10, so I didn't take the test until the next morning.

It IMMEDIATELY turned positive. I just sat there and stared at it. I did not expect that in any way! Really? It was that easy? I guess it is a good testament to the fact that I am healthier now! And it reaffirms our plan for Justin to get the snippy-snippy after this one, because now we know we CAN get pregnant on our own! So funny how things work out, isn't it?

I am so excited, although tonight I've had a few bouts of nausea and I think it's probably just the beginning. Looks like I'll probably be back on the "I don't eat except some crackers and whatever I eat goes directly to the baby but it's not enough so it also eats my fat" weight loss plan. I lost 50 lbs when I was pregnant with Sam, and he grew just fine, when you start out overweight you've got room. As for now, I'm mostly just tired, and no food really sounds good to me even when I know I'm hungry.

I can't wait though. For all of it. I'm calling the doctor tomorrow and between a little spotting and my wonky hormone history, I'm hoping to go in ASAP for some bloodwork and MAYBE an early ultrasound if I'm lucky.

I'll try not to let this turn into a pregnancy fest here, but I can't promise I won't write about it often!

Top Chef Las Vegas - Week 3: "I was pretty much in tears, y'know what I'm sayin'?"

2009-09-07T20:35:00.000-07:00

Last week on Top Chef: All the contestants bitched about the challenge. Blah blah blah. Tom Coliccio had something to say about it on the Top Chef Blog, and he said it better than me, so go check it out.

Episode 3 starts out with the girls in bed moping. Laurine says she feels intimidated by the other contestants because she was trained so long ago and the others are so talented. They head off to the resort and...

Quickfire Challenge

Create an "out of this world" dish featuring potatoes.

POTATOES! Lots of 'em. All colors and sizes. Preeeeeety. When they say "out of this world," I wonder if any of the contestants will decide to take it to the "alien" level somehow. They only have 45 minutes to cook their potatoes.

I almost fall in love with Ron when he says that what music was to Bob Marley, food is to him - peace and love. Peace and love on a plate!

Ashley decides to do a potato gnocchi even though it's going to be a really tight squeeze to pull off in the amount of time they're given. The problem with these types of decisions is they are either really impressive or end up REALLY badly. Then there is a dramatic mixup with Preeti using Ashley's water totally by mistake, Ashley was pretty pissed and it put her even further behind with her gnocchi.

Ash's chilled sweet potato custard turned out not too bad. Bryan did a soup, and Preeti went for poached potatoes, her dish was gorgeously colorful. Mike V did tuna and potatoes for a winning balance and Jennifer did potatoes three ways, which the judges thought was nice. Robin used three kinds of potatoes with pancetta and an egg, and Hector did another potatoes three ways dish. His purple potatoes and ham looked so pretty! Laurine made a veggie potato burger with a portobello bun. Uck. Mattin made cod with potato puree, and Kevin made a bacon braised yam which sounded yummy. Mike I did a potato risotto, which came out a little salty but I agreed with Padma that it was a cool idea. Ashley's gnocchi didn't get any terrible comments off the bat, and Eli made a Yam puree with pistachios and bruleed whipped maple... MMMM. Except for that shell that snuck it's way in there. Ron made a sweet potato crusted yellowtail, and they liked his side better than his main dish. Jesee did a sweet potato soup, which the judges thought was quite spicy.

Eli's yam dish was apparently too sweet, so send it over here. Seriously? Sounded delicious. Ron & Jesse are also in the bottom three. Jennifer's mussels, Ash's custard and Ashley's gnocchi made it to the top three. Mark chooses Jennifer as the winner, giving her immunity and Mike the Man calls it favoritism? WTH? I don't get what he meant by that.

Elimination Challenge

A man in dress blues walks into the kitchen. He is an Air Force Colonel and give them some orders.

Chefs must report to Nellis Air Force Base, home of the famous Thunderbirds, to prepare a meal for 300 airmen.

The Colonel points out that these people have had many types of foods and also have nutritional requirements. The chefs are told they will know nothing about their ingredients or cooking supplies until they show up on site.

Back at the house, the chefs meet and discuss the challenge. They decide to put Jennifer in charge since she cannot be eliminated if people go wrong. The chefs then divide themselves into team of two, who will each prepare a dish with an American theme. At the end, Jesse and Ron are left with each other.

When the chefs arrive at the kitchen on base, they find cans and cans and packages and packages of food. There are no stoves or pots. They have to serve 300 airmen in a less than ideal (for them) kitchen. This is an industrial kitchen, not a restaurant kitchen. Kevin has cooked in a facility like this before in ROTC, which is definitely an advantage. Jennifer takes teh best idea from each team and writes it down, and they start to prep.

All of the chefs are excited about cooking for the men and women who have been serving our country. Preeti talks about how the defining moment she wanted to be a chef was 9/11 and that it affected everyone differently, and that's how she felt it and then she went to culinary school a few years later. Huh? Um, okay...

Mike the Man decides to do a cold shrimp salad "just for the hell of it." I secretly hope it goes horribly wrong so I don't have to listen to him anymore. There is a lot of braising going on in the kitchen, Kevin's southern meat sounds really good. Ron wants to make chowder, he's won at a chowder festival before. I fear that something will go wrong. Ashley and Ash are making a chocolate brioche bread pudding and NOM NOM I WANTS.

There is only one skillet in the kitchen, everyone is having trouble because there are no burners or pots and pans, and they have to figure out timing and how to cook all of the food in what order etc. Jennifer does as good job of keeping people organized and keeping the cooking areas labelled so that everyone knows when it's their turn and who is using what. The situation could have been just AWFUL and she managed it very well to help everyone get their dishes done.

The chefs all finish their dishes on time without any major problems. Ash, Ashley & Jennifer are going to be the 'helpers,' there to refill make sure things run smoothly and basically be gofers. They start judging each other's dishes, Eli doesn't think that the clam chowder was the best idea, and Laurine doesn't feel confident about the pasta salad.

Padma is wearing a crazy dress with leopard print and a belt thing. It seems almost too sexy for the occasion. The braised pork shoulder with potato salad looked very good. I thought Kevin and Eli really hit the mark because they were really going for providing something from home for the soldiers. When he started talking about his family, I started to get a little teary eyed.

The judges were impressed with what the chefs came up with considering the ingredients they had. Well, except the pasta salad. They definitely weren't impressed with that. I don't understand why the chili was okay for a hot day but the clam chowder wasn't. Gail thought maybe because itw as creamy/heavy it wasn't as appetizing in the heat. The judges and airmen loved teh potato salad. They loved the pork belly taco things, but did not like the greek salad that came with it.

Aside from the gnocchi water incident, there was quite a large lack of drama and mistakes in this episode. When the Colonel was thanking the chefs I just couldn't hold it together. If I'd been one of those chefs? I would have been freaking bawling. What an awesome opportunity. Even though drama makes for a more fun show to watch, I guess I'm glad they didn't eff this one up. Ron sums it up - "I was pretty much in tears, y'know what I'm sayin'?"

Judges Table

The judges call Mike, Michael, Eli & Kevin first. The judges loved the BBQ Pulled Pork and the bacon dish, but they didn't have much good to say about the salad. In the end, Michael V won the challenge for his pork/bacon taco things.

Preeti, Laurine, and Mike get called back. Mike the Man is LIVID that he was in the winners bracket for his team, but called back on his own for possible elimination. I hope that he goes, I actually can barely stand him. Mike pointed out that he "didn't have to" do that dish (the salad) and the guest judge pointed out that his salad was bland, and he was responsible for it. They split up the work, went their own ways (they admitted that in the previous judging) and Mike's dish was not strong enough. Tom was determined to find out who said "let's make pasta salad," and they wouldn't or couldn't say. They said they thought their dish was flavorful. Laurine says during judging "to be honest with you, I think I honestly forgot about the competition." Dude, why would you say that during judging?!

It was a pretty harsh judging between the bottom three this time. It seemed like this was a pretty hard decision for the judges. They were really going at it at the table! Laurine and Preeti didn't understand why they were there, or what they were supposed to be doing, and Mike put forth a flavorless, unappealing throwaway dish.

In the end, it is Preeti who must pack her knives and go.

Next week, the chefs face the French.

Guess what?

2009-09-07T11:27:00.000-07:00

I have something to tell you. Here are some clues. First person to guess gets a homemade jar of delicious applesauce made from trees in my yard, and a good book to read (title tbd).

Clues:

1. Sesame Seed

2. Six

3. Naps

4. Happy Labor Day!

Cryptic? Maybe. If it's too hard, I'll just tell you. Let's see what happens.

UPDATE: okay, so obviously it wasn't too hard! Yep. I am 6 weeks pregnant with a sesame seed sized baby that is due may 6 2010. Four days after Sam turns four! And it is making me want to take a LOT of naps. I need to call the doctor tomorrow to make an appt to go in and assure all is well. I will post tonight about the whole story but I am on my way to the playground with Sam so for now I will just say that yes, we are very happy!

Thursday Thirteen: Praying for Change

2009-09-03T00:34:00.000-07:00

In the past couple of weeks, I've felt a little bit weighed down. Not by things happening to me, but by events happening in my world that can sort of pull apart and break my heart a little bit each time I think about them. We went to church weekend before last after not having been in a while, and I remembered why it's so important to me, and why I enjoy going. We're starting to get back into the swing of things, and will hopefully start attending more regularly, but in the meantime I've continued to pray on my own time. I know that not everyone out there is religious, but we all have something to offer to those in need. I truly believe that whether you pray to a god or goddess, meditate, or just offer positive thoughts and energy to those who need it, you are making a difference. This week for my Thursday Thirteen, I've got 13 prayer requests.

Thirteen Updates This Thursday

Jillian & Mona - Jillian is one of the momma's in my Mom's Meetup group. She has an adorable little daughter named Mona. Her husband, Henri, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in January, and around the 13th, they made the difficult decision for him to start hospice care at home. Last Saturday, August 29, Henri passed away comfortable surrounded by his family. I haven't been that close with Jillian during this difficult year, but I know that she and her family could really use our thoughts and prayers right now. Please pray for peace for them, and for them to remember the happy memories they had with him.
Carol - Carol is my... well, it's complicated! She is my brother-in-law's wife's mother. So basically, we're not really related. We've been blessed to have an honorary set of grandparents for Sam in her and her husband Bill. They are wonderful people who we've enjoyed having as part of the family and in our lives over the years. Carol was diagnosed recently with colon cancer. She is currently seeking natural courses of treatment. Please pray for her and for her to discover the right treatment path, whatever that may be, and for her to heal.
Harold - My father in law has been having increasing issues with his Parkinson's Disease and his health. He is a great man and has not found retirement to be an easy thing. We've been privledged to move into the house he built, and to spend a little more time with him lately as he loves being out here. I'm so happy for Sam to get to know his Grandpa better, but I need guidance in how to make things easier for him. There is a fine line between helping him stay healthy and safe and making him feel like he's having everything taken away from him. Please pray for his health, his well being, and for us to all find the right ways to interact with each other and protect each other.
Audrey - My friend Audrey, aka Auds, from Barking Mad has been facing some very difficult times lately. She wrote recently about her struggles with bulimia, she's got her son living with her now who she had not seen in a long time, and last week her beautiful daughter Meg was in a bad car accident. She is okay, but she is no doubt shaken up, and one of the passengers in her car had to have some surgery. Audrey is a dear friend to me, and reading about her pain often brings me to tears, I just love her to pieces. Please pray for her to find her way, to find the strength to get healthy again and see what a wonderful woman she is. Also please pray for Meg to forgive herself for the accident and allow herself to heal mentally & physically.
Kori & Hannah - Kori of See Kori Rant is another one of my dearest and closest bloggy friends. She is an amazing, strong woman who has been through a whole hell of a lot in life. Earlier this year her daughter Hannah was molested by a man in their community that they thought was a friend. He did a plea bargain and his sentencing is imminent. Unfortunately Hannah has not been doing too well since this incident, and she could really use our prayers and positive thoughts right now. Please pray for strength and happiness for Kori, Hannah & their whole families.
Brie - My good friend Brie is pregnant with her third child, due later this month. The pregnancy has been wonderful so far, and she's excited about adding another child to their busy bustling family. Please keep her in your thoughts and pray for an easy, non-eventful delivery!
Jaci - Jaci writes at Ravings of a Mad Housewife, and has been one of my favorite bloggers. She's been through tough times lately, and after announcing a hiatus, she is back... and pregnant! Please pray for a happy & healthy nine months for Jaci. She's REALLY getting a new beginning, and hopefully it will be a wonderful change and addition to her family.
The Unnamed Women - I don't have faces, I don't have names. But I'd like to ask for prayers and positive thoughts for the women we serve through our volunteer work at Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Services. We see sad things, things that make us angry, and things that just make us desperately want to help in some way. Unfortunately, we can't always do that. I pray every time that every woman out there who is assaulted has the strength and self-worth to get out, to value themselves, and to heal from the things that have held them down.
Rachael - Okay, yeah, I do feel like it's a little narcissistic to include myself in this list, but I've been having a hard time lately with one aspect of my life and could use some positivity and encouragement. I've been really struggling lately with my weight loss journey. For the last 6 weeks, I've been hovering and yo-yoing VERY close to the -30 lbs mark. But during those six weeks, I've lost, gained, and lost for a grand total of -1.2 lbs. I've been really struggling with my relationship with food, with exercise, with everything. While in my head I know that 30 lbs is a lot - I've almost lost one of my three year old - in the dark side of my heart, I know it's only 1/4 of what I need to do. I know that to reach my goal and be really healthy, I have to do it 3 more times, and that is something I've really been struggling with lately. Please pray that I can find strength in myself and find my path again.
M, M & M - One of my friends is going through a messy divorce and becoming a single father to his 3 & 5 year old daughters. Please pray for their new family situation to work smoothly, for them to grow up strong, and for their father to find happiness.
Rowenna - My friend Rowenna from my Mom's Meetup group is an amazing woman. She has 3 small children - 3 year old twins, and a 1 year old son. They are the most adorable kids, and so well behaved. Yesterday I went to her house to drop something off, and helped her pack up a ridiculous amount of food she had made for Jillian and her family during their hard time. She made a dozen casseroles and a dozen homemade soups as well as some quiche and baked goods. She is also without her husband right now, as he's away for 5 months attending Border Patrol training. That's right, you heard me, she is taking care of her children BY HERSELF for 5 months. At the end of that time, she and her family will be moving to a small town in Texas for 14 months. I will miss her dearly, she's one of the pillars of my 'mom community.' Maybe she doesn't need it, but please pray for the next couple of months to go by quickly for her, so she can have her husband back, and for everything to go smoothly with his transition to Border Patrol.
Jonah Williams - Jonah is an adorable little guy, and you can read about him at the Williams Family Blog. Jonah is six months old and was born with a skin condition called Epidermolysis Bullosa. It's a rare skin condition characterized by extremely fragile skin and blisters resulting from the most minor trauma or friction. Please pray that research will lead to a cure for Jonah, and that in the meantime he'll continue to be as happy and healthy as possible.
Ezra - Ezra is an adorable curly headed 2 year old blondie that was diagnosed with Leukemia earlier this year. You can read all about him at For Ezra. He's currently going through treatment, and some days are very hard. Please pray for Ezra to be healthy and for strength and peace for his family as they juggle everyday life with this battle.

As always, I want to hear your prayer requests too. Please leave any of them in the comments, along with links if there's a website involved, and thanks in advance for your prayers, positive energy, and thoughts.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others’ comments. It’s easy, and fun!

Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Project Runway LA - Week 2: Bowling Ball Bags, Chicken Eggs & Lingerie

2009-08-31T17:21:00.000-07:00

This episode made me laugh right from the get-go, I thought it was funny when Althea called it a 'wake up call' that Ari was gone, and said she didn't really expect her to go home. Did she SEE her 'dress'? I am certainly glad Mitchell didn't go home, I do think that he deserved to stay because if his measurements for his model hadn't been so off, I think his dress would have been very cool and shown a lot of workmanship.

Heidi appeared and announced that they would be designing for a real supermodel, who also has a TV show and then reveals that it is a very pregnant Rebecca Romijn. The idea of designing maternity wear seemed like a pretty big shock for a few of the designers.

Challenge: Create a form fitting maternity outfit for any type of event for Rebecca Romijn.

The designers headed up to meet Tim, and they discovered that there were fake pregnant bellies for their models. Ha. So funny. The contestants didn't even seem to know where to attach the prosthetic bellies to their design dummies. They were given a budget of $100 and 2 days to create their looks.

Logan, 25, said he is scared by babies. Then they went shopping. Shirin decided to make a dress and coat, and hoped that she'd stand out since most of the others were making just dresses. I immediately wondered if she'd be able to get it all done.

Althea's idea of a ribbon bodice with a jersey bottom sounded good and I hoped she would be able to pull it off. I also thought that Louise's 1920s style dress design looked like it could be cute. Malvin decided to make some sort of egg dress. That certainly sounded... interesting.

When Mitchell started walking around with his enormous shorts, it was pretty hilarious. I love when we get to see into those silly moments that must inevitably happen when a dozen people are working long hours in a confined space.

Ra'mon seemed to be having a lot of confidence issues. He needed to be a little more sure of himself. When Tim came up to check in on the dresses, he clearly didn't enjoy Malvin's egg dress. He called it interesting. All I know is that when my husband says that, it means he thinks it's ugly. Then Mitchell told Ra'mon that his dress looks like a bowling bag. This episode had me cracking up.

When the models came in for the fitting, they all thought the prosthetic bellies were pretty hilarious. I would assume most of them did not have any experience with being pregnant, as far as we heard only one of them had a child. I noticed that Jonny was strangely absent until they showed his hideous flowered white jacket, or as Qristyl said, "Rebecca Romijn isn't going to wear that, she wouldn't even dust with that."

On the second morning Malvin revealed that he was having a few doubts about his freaky egg dress. Mitchell is having some problems with his giant shorts. Ra'mon seemed to thinkn everyone else in the whole place was playing it safe except for him. When Mitchell put the shorts on his model they didn't look too great.

Everyone seemed to be coming down to it on time for this challenge. They were all still doing a lot of work on the second day, and a lot of them seemed to still be working when he called them out to the runway.

Monique Lhuillier was filling in for Michael Kors on this episode. Nina and Heidi were there of course, and of course Rebecca was a judge.

Logan's look was okay, Shirin's was beautiful. The coat was really cool, loved the lining. Nicolas's dress was all right. Christopher's outfit was really pretty, could be versatile for different events. Mitchell's outfit was actually cute, it looked like skorts though. Qristyl's dress was pretty, Epperson's outfit? My first thought: Eh. Then the coat came off, and just no. No. It wasn't bad enough to land him in the bottom three, but I can't imagine seeing anyone wearing it. Louise's dress was very cute, the layering definitely added to it and made it look more like a dress. Gordana's shirt and pants were cute. Jonny's dress turned out very pretty & sophisticated. Malvin's? No. Where would she wear that? Nowhere I think. Ra'Mon's dress didn't do anything for me either, that dark stripe down the front was not flattering in any way. Carol Hannah's dress was okay, I didn't care for the jacket, but liked the draping on the dress. Althea's dress sounded better conceptually for me. Irina's dress was cute, kind of plain, but looked like the perfect thing to wear to a baby shower.

I was happy to see that Jonny's ugly ass coat did not go down the runway, I think that was definitely a good decision on his part. I predicted the bottom three correctly - Ra'mon came first with sloppy looking construction and a confusing look. Rebecca totally said it looked like a bowling ball bag, exactly what Mitchell said! Malvin was the second to be in the bottom three with his 'mother hen and egg' outfit. Nina found the sling part disturbing. They agreed the outfit looked like she'd already had the baby & was carrying it. The judges thought Malvin's outfit was bizarre. Mitchell's outfit was conceptually good, but they definitely noticed teh shorts problem. They could see the belly band, the shorts were too short, and teh shirt was too tight. His problem was totally execution. Rebecca said she would wear it if the shorts were well done she'd wear them, and Heidi said they looked like she'd sewn them herself - and she doesn't sew.

Louise was the first in the top three with her tiered skirt. Her dress was good because it would be able to adjust as the belly and body grew and changed. It was also very well executed and didn't look like it had just been made over a day and a half. Althea was in the top three as well, her tailoring was clean and it was elegant. Shirin's dress was in the top three, absolutely gorgeous. I loved the coat, and she did a very cool stitch on the waistband, unique and simple. They all agreed that Shirin's outfit was the most wearable. You can see all of this week's runway looks at Lifetime.com here.

In the end, Shirin won the challenge with her dress & coat combination,

and Malvin was sent home for his egg creation.

Heidi said that truthfully, it was just 'too bizarre.'

Next week, the designers tackle working in pairs.

Top Chef Las Vegas: Week 2 - Tofu Gazpacho?

2009-08-28T14:13:00.000-07:00

The show starts out with the people who were in the bottom. Eve says she's not sure whether she should try to appease the judges or just cook her own style & hope for the best. Really? The judges DECIDE YOUR FATE. So I'd say you should probably take them into consideration.

When they enter the kitchen, there is Todd English and a craps table.

Quickfire Challenge

Roll the dice & create a dish with the same number of ingredients (salt, pepper & oil are freebies).

Cool. Again, whoever wins gets the nice little bonus of $15,000. Man, I'd be happy to go on the show just to get that! Ha. Kevin rolls a 10 and doesn't seem too happy about it. Laurine rolls a 3, the lowest number.

I was happy that Jesse was smart enough to realize butter in the pan would have been an extra ingredient, I've seen that kind of mistake before and it sucks. Unfortunately, she was still in the bottom of the challenge, he said they needed a sear on the scallops. Eve and Bryan also ended up in the bottom.

Michael's crazy cooked gazpacho ended up in the top, as did Jennifer & Kevin! I was glad that Kevin was in the top since he was so unsure about cooking with so many ingredients. In the end, Michael won the quickfire.

Elimination Challenge

Battle of the Sexes: Women will cater a bachelor party, and the men will cater for the bachelorette party.

No one on the winning team will be eligible for elimination. One of the contestants said that she was annoyed by the 'battle of the sexes' concept. I don't know why. The teams and pairing are always random/arbitrary, so what does it matter that for this time they did boys vs. girls? I don't get it.

Each team has to make at least 2 dishes to match up with each of the couple's favorite shots, so a minimum of six.

Hector decides to make a dish with Tofu and Ashley decides that she has time to make a second dish, and chooses to do a sweet dish.

Ashley is pissed off because they're doing a wedding themed challenge when at least three of the contestants are not allowed to participate in that institution. I get it. I get that it sucks, but as a chef this is the kind of thing you might have to do. You're also most likely going to have to cook meat if you're a vegetarian. I understand that it's upsetting to her, but I also wonder if she refuses to attend wedding of her friends etc. She was just letting her feelings get too out of control when she needed to focus on the challenge. I am totally for gay marriage, I don't see why it's any different. But I also think there is nothing wrong with people getting married who are currently able to.

They have an hour to set up poolside, what a great location. Eve starts having trouble with her dish lacking flavor during set up/prep. Laurine says she thinks the boys' food is "contrived" and that the girls have stayed with more familiar flavors. Ashley is still talking about how being gay is making this challenge hard.

The judges notice Eve's ceviche right away - too fishy, no flavor. But the guys love the octopus. They didn't like Ashley's weird bay leaf panna cotta either. In fact, it didn't seem the girl's dishes were all that successful overall.

The guys dishes seemed to pass a little bitter, perhaps they got the pairing part better than the girls did? They thought the tofu ceviche was actually good, which is great because I wasn't sure about that one. They liked the meringue. In the end I felt the guys definitely did better, but not all of their dishes were winners either.

Then the guys all jumped in the pool, which I thought was a little weird because... itw as in the middle of a party? That wasn't for them? It was just odd.

Judges Table

The judges call in four chefs from the guys team first. They announce that the boys won the challenge, and Eli, Bryan, Hector & Michael are competing for the win. They kept calling Bryan's meringue a macaroon, which totally annoyed me. Those are REALLY different things. In the end, brothers Michael and Bryan came head to head, and Bryan won.

Padma asks them to send back Eve, Jesse, Preeti & Ashley. Jesse's dish was wattery and not gingery enough. Eve's said she wanted to do Mexican spice & flavors, but her dish failed because the salsa was too strong, and the shrimp didn't taste like anything. Preeti was happy with her dish, but Tom said it was overcured. They asked her why she included the shiso leaves when they were pretty much wilting immediately. Ashley made it sound like the team made the decision to make a second dish, when in reality she decided to do it on her own. Unfortunately they actually liked her watermelon dish, but not the panna cotta.

The judges talked about how Eve just didn't seem to know what she was doing or where she was going - seemed like she was just throwing things together and hoping it would work out, which sort of goes along with her comments at the beginning of the show about not knowing which direction to go.

In the end, it's Eve who has to pack her knives and go.