One in ten joggers said that they have sex at least once a day and three per cent of joggers said they have sex twice a day.

Amongst non-runners one in four (25 per cent) said they had sex once a month or less.

The survey, which questioned 1,000 runners and 1,000 non-runners, also found that one in ten male runners confessed to thinking about sex while exercising.

In comparison, only five per cent of woman said they think about sex while running and almost half spend their time thinking about how the exercise is benefitting them.

The poll, carried out for healthcare charity Sue Ryder Care, also found that a quarter of joggers admitted going running to help them flirt with the opposite sex in a trend branded ‘flunning’.

More than a third said they have managed to strike up a conversation with someone of the opposite sex while running.

The survey sponsor said there are almost 600,000 “flunners” in the UK and ”It’s a great opportunity for single runners to get out there and find their lovematch.”

I’m Single-Task Bob. The only thing I can think about while running is running. I’m guessing those who flirt while running aren’t very good at either. And will my man card be revoked if I suggest you just let the poor women run? If I catch you flunning with my wife I will flun you up, big time.

I did learn, however, that three percent of joggers are lying.

In honor of the first annual Global Warming, My Ass! 6.66 Mile Run (which I will be running on Sunday), here is a group of kindred spirits pretending it’s summer on the track:

LetsRun.com wants you to know they’ve figured out how to use iTunes. And I can’t think of a less-desired use of technology than the Adidas miCoach, which verbally nags you while you run. Yippee!

On the other hand, screaming back at your miCoach might help you with a common running problem: boredom.

Deciding which running accessories you need is getting more complicated every day. Here’s one article telling you what you can’t do without, and another telling you what you can do without.

Now it’s time for this week’s Running Photos You Don’t Want to See. First up is the errant snot rocket…

…followed by Andrew Hall running a trail race in a lime-green mankini…

Yikes.

The University of Iowa Nearly Naked Mile didn’t show anywhere near as much skin.

And one coach has a slightly creepy way to tell if young male runners are serious about the sport.

I have the perfect rebuttal to all these lectures about the need to cross-train. I. Don’t. Want. To.

A columnist for the Hong Kong Standard describes marathon running this way: “This bizarre Western craze has four stages: 1) You run. 2) You have a heart attack. 3) You die and are buried. 4) You get this really cool medal bearing the word ‘failed.’”

But a columnist in New Zealand found peace with running after first thinking it was “marginally less fun than waterboarding.”

Awesome Old Dude of the Week is 53-year-old Gary Allen, who has run sub-three-hour marathons in the 1970s, 80s, 90s and 00s, and last Saturday did it in the 10s with a 2:51:03 at the Snickers Marathon in Albany, Georgia.

I made the mistake of thinking the Boston Herald’s The Inside Track was about track. No, it’s a gossip column, but it managed a bit of a crossover by interviewing Valerie Bertinelli about her upcoming Boston Marathon run.

This week’s linky love goes out to triathletes Rock Star Tri and Fish, Bike, Run, from someone who thinks a peloton is a Japanese anime villain.

That’s all for this week, friends. Thirty-three years ago today, scientists discovered rings around Uranus. This is the one day each year you are allowed to snicker. Submit your posts to carnival@runningisfunny.com. Until next time, run away!

2) Young runners: Party all night, can run a mile for each beer consumed. Old runners: Asleep by 10, can run a mile for each porta potty stop.

3) Young runners: Get hurt while doing things. Old runners: Get hurt lying in bed.

4) Young runners: Hate being geezered. Old runners: Can’t be geezered.

5) Young runners: Look forward to getting faster. Old runners: Look forward to new age group.

Unfortunately, by that time Maltese runner Jonathan Balzan and Dutch runner Neals Strik had lost contact with the car and the Moroccans, and were left running alone, off course. When the two men failed to find a water station, they realized they were lost and abandoned the race. Here you can see a greatly agitated Balzan explaining the situation to race officials and reporters (in Maltese, but you’ll get the drift). Strik, who was the race favorite, also chimes in (in English).

El Barouki and El Felhi, despite running an additional 3k, finished first and second, respectively. Race organizers confirmed the results, and Balzan was offered compensation so he could run another marathon. No word on whether any accommodation was offered to Striks.

The Olympics ended on Sunday, but that is hardly the pinnacle of human athletic achievement. For my money, it’s the Burrito Mile, which, as you may have guessed, involves eating a burrito then running a mile. The entire event was recorded, of course, but most of the videos are reaaaalllly long, so I’ve posted this one of the reading of the rules:

The men’s record is 6:15.7, while the women’s record is 7:21.7. But these records pale in comparison to the one set by Greg Wagner. He ran the 4×8urrito Relay by himself in an amazing 51:12. The relay usually consists of four runners, the first of whom consumes a one-pound burrito, then takes a second burrito as a baton and runs 800 meters, passing it to the second runner, who consumes it and repeats the pattern. Wagner not only ran the race alone, but ate all four burritos himself. He turned down a complimentary fifth burrito as a prize.

If you can stomach it, you can watch Wagner’s entire race, including the tension-filled eating of the fourth burrito (and subsequent yak).

Headline of the Week goes to this press release.

The Guernsey Hash House Harriers put on a Mud ‘n’ Fun Run, which included some participants in “fancy dress.”

Yet another vertical race, this time in Omaha, and the Orange County Register profiles a stair racer.

It appears the best master runners were late to the sport of running. There’s hope for me yet. Even better, it helps if you expect the worst. And if the worst happens, you can always sue.

If you don’t know anything about the amazing Ed Whitlock, this Running Times interview has it all.

I remember how rough my first half-marathon was, but at least I wasn’t passed by a turkey and a chef.

If you have any women readers at all, you can’t go wrong with a story about running bras. Here’s the latest review of the Shock Absorber Run Bra. I guess if you have wings, you might as well have shock absorbers, too. And what about undies?

In this week’s celebrity running news, New Orleans mayor-elect Mitch Landrieu ran a 2:14 in his first half-marathon, while the world’s most famous athlete took a break from running around to run around.

This week’s linky love goes out to Badger Runner and Run Bitches Run, who regales us with tales of the world’s worst yoga class. Check them out!

That’s all for this week, friends. Happy Hinamatsuri! Submit your posts to carnival@runningisfunny.com. Until next time, run away!