NaNoWriMo Author Profile:
http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/43421

NaNoWriMo Novel-in-Progress:
QUEENS OF THE CATTAILS
Click here to begin at Chapter 1.

For me, managing a family of seven is challenging on any given day.  When disaster strikes, it’s all too easy for me to succumb to the stresses — both internal and external — and the house is in constant danger of falling apart.

My Giant, Animal Lovers Guide of Acadiana, November/December 2009

…the thought of someone lurking in the shadows made me very nervous; Piko sensed this.  He trotted ahead of me, ears perked, prepared to warn me if anything was amiss.  My little dog isn’t a foot tall, but walking with him in the dark was like walking with a giant, and I felt safe.

We moved to Jones Street because it seemed friendly and safe.  In the six years we’d lived there, we’d never felt threatened by anyone or anything.  In a matter of seconds, a little mail-out notice shattered my confidence.  The only thing I could think about was protecting my children, even if it meant moving away.

Children are no different from their parents in needing a quiet, comfortable, gratifying workspace.

The Spirit That Never Leaves, Houston Hula School Ka Nu Hou newsletter, Vol. 2, Issue 1, September 2009

A single thread I’ve seen woven through the heart of every individual who has lived the way of hula at some point in life…the spirit never leaves you.

The Amazing Dog Park (Click to read .pdf file), Animal Lovers Guide of Acadiana, September/October 2009

When Lafayette opened the community dog park on St. Julien, I wanted more than anything to take my pooch to frolic in the green grasses with all the other happy dogs.  Observing his aggressive behavior at home, however, I thought lawsuits are best avoided.  The dog park would have to wait.

“Hula Holoku” (painting), Houston Hula School Ka Nu Hou newsletter, Vol. 2, Issue 1, September 2009

I’ve mistakenly thought our hearts were relatively safe if we successfully kept bad words out of the home…It never occurred to me, however, that an acidic tone of voice can be just as injurious as four-letter words.

Learning to Love, Animal Lovers Guide of Acadiana, August 2009

I discovered, all these years, I’ve never really known my pets.  I’ve been a pet owner — not a pet parent.

Divorce can really bring out the ugly side in people.  It’s one of the worst kinds of pain there is.  I never thought I’d survive my parents’ divorce…So many marriages end up that way, but that doesn’t mean yours has to.

Every day on the Internet, another formerly anonymous citizen finds fame on film after starring in a school campus brawl or a wild animal attack.  Altercation and violence are entertaining…Somehow, the wide acceptance of edgy home recordings filtered down to my daughter.

Crayons, Comic Strips, & Creative Writing, Magnolia Home Educators Free SPIRIT Newsletter, June 2009

Through the course of my parent advisement sessions, a common complaint is, “My child is so imaginative but says she hates writing. She won’t do more than the minimum required for a passing grade!”  I believe the root of the problem is, many children never learn to enjoy writing.

Since we didn’t have black-eyed peas, we used what we did have: rice.  We didn’t have pillar candles, so I used the votives I keep stocked (Mary’s Candles in Monroe, Louisiana has the richest, yummiest candles in the world. My favorite is “creme brulee.”).

Prissy and Bunny went scavenging in the yard and in the neighborhood for “natural decorations,” since we didn’t have the pomegranate and artichokes shown in the magazine.

The girls did an outstanding job.  They brought back rosebuds, tiny oranges, and cuts of holly from a discarded holly branch.

We put all the elements together in our own wooden bowl, and we couldn’t have been happier with the results.  Now, we have a beautiful wreath arrangement for Advent, a gorgeous centerpiece, and it was 100% free.

• 30% Endeavors - Creative pursuits, business ventures, community involvements, memberships.
• 20% Finances - Budgeting, bill paying, planned purchases.
• 20% Writing - Goals, works-in-progress, pending submissions, planned projects.
• 15% Kids - Care, education, attention, extracurricular provisions, handling conflicts.
• 10% House - Cleaning, organization, maintenance (excludes “decorating”).
• 5% Spouse - Care, affection, attention, joint interests, handling conflicts.

I can compare this data to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.  Granted…

For the most part, physiological and safety needs are reasonably well satisfied in the “First World”. The obvious exceptions, of course, are people outside the mainstream — the poor and the disadvantaged. If frustration has not led to apathy and weakness, such people still struggle to satisfy the basic physiological and safety needs. They are primarily concerned with survival: obtaining adequate food, clothing, shelter, and seeking justice from the dominant societal groups.

Safety and Security needs include:

• Personal security from crime
• Financial security
• Health and well-being
• Safety net against accidents/illness and the adverse impacts

Yes, I’d agree: my bottom-tier needs are “reasonably well satisfied,” but I’m focusing on how my personal stress influences the way I interpret “need” and impacts my ability to survive, thrive, and ensure my kids survive and thrive.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

• Physiological Needs - Satisfied.
• Safety Needs - Heavily stressed.  Financial stress would fall into this category, as well as stresses related to raising kids.  “Safety of morality,” which I also interpret as “safety of values,” is one of my highest priorities as a mother.  Whether or not I send out into the world compassionate, free-thinking, proactive people reflects whether or not I’ll feel I’ve succeeded or failed in offering my family all the things in the “Safety” tier, since I believe health, property, resources, etc. will follow those qualities I aim to nurture in my kids.
• Love/Belonging - Well Satisfied.  I believe this is why “Kids” and “Spouse” share smaller percentages in the Stress Chart.
• Esteem - Severely Stressed.  “Writing” and “Endeavors” make up a large part of my stress.  As it fits into the Maslow pyramid, I’m absolutely unsurprised.
  

  All humans have a need to be respected, to have self-esteem, self-respect, and to respect others. People need to engage themselves to gain recognition and have an activity or activities that give the person a sense of contribution, to feel accepted and self-valued, be it in a profession or hobby. Imbalances at this level can result in low self-esteem or an inferiority complex. People with low self-esteem need respect from others. They may seek fame or glory, which again depends on others. It may be noted, however, that many people with low self-esteem will not be able to improve their view of themselves simply by receiving fame, respect, and glory externally, but must first accept themselves internally. Psychological imbalances such as depression can also prevent one from obtaining self-esteem on both levels.

• Self-Actualization - My North Star.  Will always be there to guide my motivations, but will remain eternally beyond grasp.  Why?  Because I don’t believe I’ll ever self-actualize.  Perfectionists of my grade should avoid spending too much time “perfecting” the concept of what it might actually mean to attain self-actualization.  And I write that only half-joking.

—

What’s bugging me is the question, How does/will an imbalance in the “Esteem” and “Self-Actualization” tiers impact the lower tiers?

The imbalance does, has, and will impact my lower tiers, and intuitively, I know why.  I believe I could trace the cycle if I spent enough time pondering it.  If I decode that, I might be able to pinpoint that crucial “turning point” that allows the cycle to continue.

Update: If you’re here looking for ideas on making a mouse costume, here are a couple photos of the finished product, followed by basic instructions.  More details on the process are included in the journal entry below; you just have to read through till you come across them.

If you have specific questions, you can email me: alaranang(at)gmail(dot)com.  Good luck!

MOUSE COSTUME

Top & Pantaloons (worn over a leotard for warmth): McCall’s Pattern 4505 (photo of envelope further below)

—

Ears:

• craft foam
• blush & blush brush
• hot glue
• hair clamps, barrettes, or ribbons

1. Cut two ovals from foam (can be bought at any fabric store), and cover with cloth.

2. Add pink accent to inner ear with blush and blush brush, stroking from base of ear toward the outer edge.

3. Cinch together bottom edges to create a concave shape, and sew or hot glue in place.

4. Hot glue ears onto hair clamps, barrettes, ribbons, or whatever is easiest for you to secure to hair. (I tied Squeak’s hair into two buns to give the clamps a good anchor.)

—

Tail:

• 1/2 yard ribbon, or more if you want the tail longer (white or pink)
• 1.5 yards pink yarn, or more

1. Knot together the strand of ribbon (near the end of the ribbon) and longer yarn (about 1/3 up the length of the yarn).  The ribbon serves as your tail structure, and the shorter length of yarn will be pulled later to give the tail the distinct “curl.”

2. Wrap the longer yarn strand tightly around the length of ribbon AND the shorter yarn piece until the ribbon is covered completely.

3. Knot together at the finished end.  Gently pull the length of pink yarn inside the wrapping.  The tail will curl and hold its shape instead of falling flat.  You can manipulate the shape, too, so that it’s neatly spiral or kinked like a cartoon.

4. Safety pin the tail to the seat of mouse’s pants.  I pinned the tail to the elastic band of Squeak’s tights and threaded it through a hole in the back of her pantaloons so it wouldn’t sag.

—

Shoes: WalMart has some satin slippers in black or white for only $3 or so. They’re perfectly comfortable and have a sueded sole, for protection when trick-or-treating.

Makeup: Don’t forget to draw on whiskers and a nose! I blushed Squeak’s cheeks and nose bright pink before drawing on the details.

————-

(Written August 18, 2007)

Oh my goodness…. “Best Laid Plans” - The joke of the century.

The house is an honest wreck. It’s 12:37 AM, just after midnight, and I’m just now winding down. We didn’t get back from the performance until after 10, and by the time the kids were fed, changed, cleaned up and tucked in, it was well after 11.

I really need to sleep, but I’m wired, faced with the whirlwind day and all the things I need to do…. Makes me ill just thinking about it. And all the while, dealing with an unusual amount of stress because it’s been pointed out to me oh-so-well within the past 72 hours that I am lacking.

I sewed through the night last night. After play practice, the director decided to cast Pipsqueak in the play, as (guess what)–a mouse! I was tickled pink about that. She was four years old earlier in the summer, during the auditions. She was so precocious, she decided she’d sing for the audition, though I’d already made the call not to include her, because she was just too young to focus enough to endure those weeks and weeks of practices.

But she went with me to just about every practice, entertaining herself on the sidelines for hours on end. She learned all the songs by heart. Over the past week, I let her leave my side and go stand with the cast during voice warm-ups to sing with everyone else, since she knew all the lyrics. She enjoyed that and interacted with everyone so well.

I let her continue to mingle, and last night, the director proposed to let her participate. I was so happy for her about that, but apprehensive. She’s sung with everyone else during warm-ups, but there was no telling how she’d react in front of an audience, and she didn’t have an opportunity to do even a dry run before being up there on stage.

I told the director I’d talk with her, make her a costume, and we’d just have to see how it panned out. If she got out there under the lights, saw the audience, and freaked out, then at least she’d have a cute costume for Halloween or dress-up.

We got home from practice last night around 10. I sent the kids off to bed and took some time to brainstorm a costume. Lacking material, my first idea was to fashion a unitard-type suit out of one of M.’s old t-shirts. Pipsqueak cried and squirmed while I pinned the stretchy fabric from neck to toe. I knew it would be a challenge, working with jersey knit. In theory, it would be only a few seams, but since I wouldn’t have her there for the night to check the fit, I tossed the t-shirt idea.

Instead, I decided to build on some pieces we already had and make the rest from the patterns I already have. I knew it would have to be simple, but dramatic for the stage.

No gray material to speak of, so all I had left was some white muslin remnants left over from hula. Pipsqueak already had a pair of pantaloons Mom made last year, and since pantaloons speak of times past, no matter what era, it was perfect.

She had no white leotard or top, so the main piece I had to make was that. I chose an undershirt pattern from McCall’s (M4505). Since the mouse is the fairy godmother’s “royal page” or sorts, and a child, I thought something kind of “pajama”-like would be appropriate. The fairy godmother does visit Cinderella late at night, after all, when children–mouse or not–should be in bed, so it seemed fitting.

Of course, since it’s a play–and a fairytale at that–embellishments were in order.

The rat-turned-coachmen wear tuxedos in the play, so I decided to mimic the ruffle-tucks along the front shirt panel. I sewed a length of wide pink satin ribbon down the center, bordered on either side by two rows of delicate lace. And I trimmed the collar and bottom hem with wide eyelet lace.

For the ears, I wanted to do something a little more eloquent than the usual felt circles attached to a headband. Instead, I covered circles of foam with fabric and pinched the bottoms to make them a little concave, the way mouse ears should be. I had no fabric paint or pink remnants to detail the insides of the ears, so instead, I used blush. I never would’ve thought blush would actually be even better than any alternative! Blush is a perfect shade of pink, because it’s meant to be flesh-colored. And since blush is a powder, I could blend it–heavy at the base of the inside of the ear, then lighter toward the edges.

To secure the ears to Pipsqueak’s head, I hot-glued the foam ears to little clear hairclips I’ve used in the past for flowers. This way, the ears wouldn’t have to be flat, facing the audience. With the clips, I can position the ears individually on either side of her head and place them at a much more natural angle.

I was so pleased with the end result! The ears look like they’re sprouting out of her head, instead of the tired ol’ headband thing. And the blush gives the perfect impression of realism.

For the tail…. I wanted to depart from the same old ribbon/fabric pinned to the back of the pants, or attached to elastic at the waist. I wanted the tail to have some shape and movement.

When making yarn leis for hula, I discovered a long time ago that if I wind the ribbon/yarn too tight, it makes the lei stiff so that it doesn’t hang naturally, but instead holds whatever shape it’s put in. For leis, that’s a bad thing, but for a mouse tail…it’s ideal!

Miraculously, I had some leftover pink yarn that I used in learning to knit–just enough for a mouse tail. I dragged out my lei-making contraption and wound the yarn very tight around a long, rolled strip of fabric–thicker at one end, then tapering toward the other. I wove the ends back up into the tail, and just as I expected, the tail holds whatever shape I choose! I curled the end a bit, put kinks here and there, just as mouse tails are in drawings and cartoons.

To finish it all off, Pipsqueak wore white tights and satin houseshoes. I twisted her hair up into two buns to give me an anchor for the ear clips. I made up her cheeks to be deep pink and drew on very fine whiskers, dabbed on a little eyeliner on the tip of her nose.

Oh, her costume was just adorable. (Photo after next performance.) I didn’t finish until after the sun was already coming up, but even then, I couldn’t go right to sleep. I had the whole ensemble hanging up in the kitchen, and I stood there for a quite a long time surveying my work and chuckling to myself at the tidbits of humor I successfully infused into the whole outfit.

I’ll never know if anyone else will notice the funny little things I set out to do, but I think, in a way, that’s part of the reward in sewing costumes. Costume design–as I’ve discovered–is an art. There is so much room for self-expression, so many opportunities to create something tangible from personal thoughts and feelings.

The director and the cast just loved the new little mouse, as if the self-satisfaction weren’t enough. The feeling I’ve carried away is the same feeling I experience after performing hula to an appreciative audience, or when I’ve completed a portrait and I’m satisfied with the likeness.

I find it’s becoming easier and easier to accomplish those many complicated sewing techniques I never quite understood or successfully pulled off in the past. And I’m gaining so much confidence in myself. I no longer panic when I think of sewing something with tons of details and embellishments, and I don’t feel overwhelmed when faced with several projects that need to be done stat.

Success, however, can be dangerous. The more I learn and accomplish, the more I want to learn and accomplish, which will soon lead to biting off more than I can chew, which will lead right back to feeling bad that I procrastinate and/or fail to find the time/energy to do what I say I’m going to do.

I’ve already started brainstorming the girls’ fall wardrobes, and I’m feeling very apprehensive about that. I’ve got tons of brown corduroy from last fall, which will make great skirts or jumpers, so at least I have a starting point, and I don’t have to stress about spending a fat dollar on fabric.

—

Dean is in the Gulf, and I’m expecting M. home early–possibly Sunday or Monday. Caught unprepared with the house in shambles, and I’ll have to somehow pull it all together, get the house tidy and comfy for his return, while dealing with the final performances of the play. (Fie on’t, Dean! Fie!)

And I’m still not done with lesson plans.

The organization book I’m reading has now brought me to “goal setting.” In homeschooling, this is not something I’ve done very conscientiously in the past. And certainly not in great detail. I’ve had a general idea of what all I want us to accomplish by the end of the year, like “Earth Science,” or “American History.” But I have never broken it down by more specific subjects, and I certainly have never planned the material for the year, months, weeks, in advance.

I’ve begun to do just that. Not setting deadlines, but “targets.” For instance, I plan for us to get through Ancient Rome by the end of the second week in October. The kids will all read a novel and do a book report by the end of September. We’ll get through Addition fact families by the second week in September. Among other things.

It’s a lot of work and braining to plan the structure this way, but I think this is a breakthrough for us. I’ve always known planning the year is one of those things teachers just “do,” but I didn’t think it was necessary for our family. Now, I have a change of heart, and I believe the year plan is exactly what we need.

—

It feels so good to write all these things out. A way of affirming to myself I’m making progress, accomplishing things, doing more than just washing clothes, stressing about errands, cooking meals, and feeling bad about all I haven’t done yet. It feels so good, I am tempted to just go on and on and on, indulging in typing out all the happy little details of each thing on my plate.

But I know I’ve got four more scope-and-sequence books I have to get through before I’m done with lesson plans. And the time I spend typing about it, I could spend actually working on it.

—

I’m so glad I’m writing something pleasant. Nearly made myself sick with worry last night dealing with pressure and conflict. I asked God to help me through that, and He did. And Pipsqueak has a painfully cute costume to show for it. Amen.