Partnership Coaching

Are You Using Your Third Ear?

2010-03-05T17:01:29Z

By DOUG EMERSON

A truly effective coach not only hears what his/her coachee is saying, they also hear what the person is not saying. Spoken words in a coaching conversation communicate information; but unspoken messages can provide deeper insight into issues, emotions, and motives.
Being a great listener in a face-to-face coaching situation is difficult enough. But in today’s virtual environment of instant communication, what does one have to do differently to be a great listener and achieve real communication? The key is learning how to listen with your third ear.

Only 7% of Communication Relies on the Words Themselves
Research tells us that the overall effectiveness of communications is based

only 7% on the words used
38% on the tone of voice and sounds
and a whopping 55% on body language!

Listen To What They Are NOT Saying

Virtual communication requires focusing on the 38%, because, when you are not physically with a person, you must rely on non-visual cues to provide increased understanding. Your intuition will serve you well here, and you activate it when you begin to listen with your third ear. Use the third ear to listen between the words you hear by focusing on:

Pauses
Sighs or hesitations
Tone of voice and inflection
Pace of speech
Energy level and animation in the voice
Level of commitment to taking action

So What Should You Do?
Pay attention to your own intuitive hunches. If your third ear is collecting impressions about something you think might be important to your coachee, try saying something like, “I don’t know where this is coming from, but I sense a lot of apprehension in your voice. Are you feeling afraid?”
Practice sensing non-verbal cues and exercising your intuition as much as possible. Validate the accuracy of your hunches by checking them out with others and asking for feedback.
For a coach, trusting your ‘third ear’ is one of the most important steps you can take to develop your virtual listening skills and become a truly great listener.

Is Your Vision 20/10?

2010-01-19T19:27:33Z

Happy 2010! I am already optimistic about our New Year. In terms of eyesight, 20/10 signifies “better than normal vision.” So what better year to start improving your leadership vision? Having this skill is critical, and it is often the trickiest part of leadership to get right.

Vision is about possibility. It is about seeing what could be where others can only see what is, or sometimes worse, what was. Human beings have a tendency to project into the future more of what has happened in the past. To be a great leader, you have to be able to help your people to see what is possible, and help them to move towards that image.

So how do you develop a vision? A good way to start is by asking yourself, “What do my people need that only I can give them?” Really consider this point. By the nature of your job, you have access to more information than they do. You have studied industry trends more than many of them have. You have a more holistic view of the organization. You have (hopefully) listened to the perspectives of customers, colleagues, and employees. You are the leader for a variety of reasons. What are those reasons? What is that you can see that they can’t necessarily see…yet?

Now ask, does your vision motivate you? If not, start over.

Of course it is not all about you. Once you have your vision, it’s time to start having conversations with others. Powerful conversations are the secret weapon of many a great leader. Talk to your boss, if you have one—or a mentor or a coach—and run it by some trusted colleagues. Have powerful conversations, and the vision gets better.

I have a Sr. VP client who did just this. He developed a compelling, inspiring vision for his organization of 800 people in just five words. After some powerful conversations with his CEO, he reduced it to an even more powerful four words. These words capture exactly what this executive wants to convey about the future for his company. And they are loaded with possibility.

So here’s a quick recap:

Recognize that you need a vision, and even more importantly, your people need you to have one.
At first…it’s all about you and your unique perspective.
Then you quickly realize…It’s not just about you.
Talk about it, refine it, be willing to fine tune it.
Then give it away: communicate like crazy and watch the changes that happen…watch your people rise to the challenge of a better future.

Visionaries are by necessity optimists. Who wants to spend time and energy imagining a worse future?

"The essence of optimism is that it takes no account of the present, but it is a source of inspiration, of vitality and hope where others have resigned. It enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not to abandon it to his enemy."

Detrick Bonhoeffer, German Theologian

2010. It is time for better vision. It is time for you to lead with possibility. Your people need and deserve it…and if you think about it, you may realize that you are exactly the person who can help them to see.

Patty Keenan

www.keenaninsights.com

Extra! Extra! Read All About It! Cox Enterprises Wins Prestigious Georgia Coaches Association PRISM Award!

2009-05-17T12:44:56Z

On April 29, 2009, The Atlanta Coaches Group sponsored the fourth annual Prism Awards. Nominees for this prestigious award must demonstrate that they believe passionately in the power of coaching as a transformational force in organizations and its positive impact on bottom line results through:

• Development of leadership skills that support business strategies
• Maximized productivity, teamwork, and collaboration
• Higher levels of key talent retention
• Inspired employee engagement

The 2009 finalists were:

• American Cancer Society
• Cox Enterprises
• GE Energy
• ibm.com
• Thomas Kauffman, DDS, PC

The winners were Cox Enterprises and Dr. Thomas Kaufmann (for small business).

Robert Cahn, Director of Leadership Development, Diversity and Training for Cox Enterprises, presented the case study describing the fifteen year coaching journey Cox has taken. Over 1000 leaders have been coached by external executive coaches as part of their leadership development. The success of the program is measured in terms of participant feedback, pre- and post- 360 assessment data, boss and direct report feedback, outcomes of significant business projects, and career progression.

Perhaps the most significant indicator of the value of coaching at Cox is that no one has mentioned cutting the budget for executive coaching during the current economic downturn. The reason—the leaders making budget decisions are the very leaders who have benefited from having an executive coach.

While Cox has a multi-faceted approach to leadership development, year after year the participants vote their executive coaching experience as number two only behind attending a four-day Outward Bound outdoor leadership challenge.

Congratulations to Cox for making a long term commitment to its leaders through coaching!

Inquiry:

What is your organization’s commitment to coaching?
What could you do to influence your organization to up the ante on the investment in coaching?
What could your organization do to increase the impact of coaching?