Not Another Top 10 List!

Top 10 TV Shows My Dad Watched in the 80’s

2010-03-12T09:41:00.016-05:00

Yes it is all fun and games when you watch The Cosby Show or Thundercats growing up. However, when the lights are low and it is time for some serious TV, the 80’s really provided a medley of dramas. My parents watched all kinds of “programs”. That is the term my father used and I remember them. So here is my 10 TV Shows that My Dad Watched!

10. Hunter

Sgt. Rick Hunter (Fred Dryer)and Sgt Dee Dee McCall (Stephanie Kramer)are on duty in the drama Hunter.

9. Highway To Heaven

Starring the late great Michael Landon. The premise of this show was that Michael’s character Jonathan Smith was send down by the big man upstairs to help mortals overcome their issues and get back on track.

8. Magnum P.I.

Another Crime drama starring Tom Selleck as a cop named Thomas Magnum. The series takes place in Hawaii and really I think this great show was the inspiration for Dog The Bounty hunter to work in bail bonds.

7. Beauty And The Beast

Ok I will level with you that my dad didn’t watch this but I remember it so vividly like I bought the DVDs for myself last year and waited for the romance to ensue. Ron Perlman is Vincent the gentle but hideous beast that falls in love with Catherin who is played by the lovely Linda Hamilton. There is also some cop drama that goes on here as well.

6. Coach

The ABC television series that portrayed what it was like to pretty much be a gym teacher, I mean Football Coach. Craig T. Nelson stared as Hayden Fox a Coach that works for the same university as his daughter is attending. I guess the guy had a hard time coming to terms that his little girl was growing up which was the basis for most of the plot line.

5. T.J. Hooker

A crime drama that stared William Shatner who played a 15-year veteran of the force named T.J. Hooker. Another mega star included Heather Locklear as Officer Stacy Sheridan.

4. Knight Rider

David Hasselhoff is Michael Knight who works for a secret organization that gave him a really sweet car. K.I.T.T. Pretty much all Michael Knight does is sit in the car and let K.I.T.T. do all the work for him.

3. Golden Girls

Ok I believe in my heart that my dad just sat through The Golden Girls because my mom wanted to watch it. We have Blanche (Rue McClanahan), Sophia (Estelle Getty), Dorothy (Bea Arthur), and Rose (Betty White) who are golden agers living together. Enough said.

2. Matlock

Oh my goodness this brings back memories, right now all I can hear is the horn and piano intro! Ben Matlock (Andy Griffth) is a gray suit wearing man of fairness. Him and his team are always out to find out the truth.

1. MacGyver

I know this isn’t a surprise but my dad really loved this show. I mean Richard Dean Anderson played a guy who could do anything because his analytical sense was out of this world. MacGyver has really left it’s mark on the world being referenced in The Simpsons and many other cultural refinances.

Top 10 Most Memorable Venture Brother’s Moments!!!!

2010-03-08T13:46:00.006-05:00

I love The Venture Brothers, and I originally was going to make this "Top 10 Best Venture Brothers Moments" but I realized that there is no way in heck I can do that. I don't know if I can pick the 10 best, maybe if my list was longer and had 20. So I decided to make this "The Top 10 Most Memorable Venture Brothers Moments". I hope you will agree with me on these!

10. Boots On

Season 2 episode "Assassinanny 911". Brock is forced to hunt down his mentor Hunter, and kill him. Through the episode Brock has flashbacks of everything Hunter has taught him through the years and apparently attempting to get it on with Molotov.

9. I Hate You

Season 3 "Home Is Where the Hate Is". 24 had a rough season 3, here he is in sick bay because the Moppets knifed him. Thankfully 21 is a thoughtful friend and brought someone to visit.

8. Who Was That?

From Season 4 "Perchance to Dean". Dr. Venture aborted one of the many clones of Dean he had, which eventually became a Phantom of The Opera Character haunting the Venture Compound. D-19, dreams of being accepted by his father finally come true at the end of the episode.

7. Deaths Of Hank and Dean

Season 2 "Powerless in the Face of Death". Dr. Orpheus feels guilty about the boys deaths in the conclusion of season 1. However, Dr. Venture and Brock openly discuss the various deaths of Hank And Dean to a troubled necromancer. ***Montage Warning***

6. Brock Sampson Vs Lightsaber

Season 1 "Tag Sale – You're It!". The Ventures need to make some much needed cash to pay off some bills. Dr. Venture sells 21 a "working" lightsaber; which, he cannot wait to use on Brock Sampson.

5. Evil Legs

Season 3 "Shadowman 9: In the Cradle of Destiny". Doctor Girlfriend is forced to remember how her arching career got started with Phantom Limb.

4. The Return Of Colonel Gentleman

Season 3 "Now Museum-Now You Don't". I love Mallow Cups and so does Colonel Gentleman when he is upset. Episodes earlier the boys went looking for Colonel Gentleman and thought he was dead but we find out he was just in a diabetic coma. The man is an ox!

3. Fake Sex On Graph Paper

Season 1 "Past Tense". This whole episode kind of marks the future writing styles of Doc Hammer and Jackson Publick with story lines messing together. Here we find Rusty, Peter White, Barron Underbite, and Mike Sorayama playing some D&D and Rusty decides to have his character have sex with Mike's "Leslie Golem"

2. The Venture Bros on Sexually Transmitted Disease

Season 4 "Self-Medication". Action Johnny leads a group of ex-Boy Adventures to a seedy bar to find out who killed their therapist with a Vietnamese Two-Step Viper. What Johnny says to the villain before the fight breaks out was probably my most talked about moment from Season 4 thus far.

1. 24 We Miss You

Season 2 Powerless in the Face of Death". Although 24 is gone but not forgotten the sequence with him and 21 getting ready to start henching again for the Monarch is the best moment ever!

Find all of the Venture Bros. Season at DVD Empire

Top 10 DVDs In Need Of A Double Dip

2009-03-23T14:11:00.012-04:00

We all hate it when we buy the latest blockbuster movie on DVD or Blu-ray, only to have a better version released just a few months later with more extras, sound options, and toys, the infamous “double dip.” But even worse is when a great film is released with with practically no extras and you end up waiting ten years for the must own version (Blade Runner, anyone?). Here are ten movies in desperate need of an upgrade.

10. Waiting For Guffman

Admittedly, the original release does have some noteworthy extras, like commentary by Director/Co-Writer/Actor Christopher Guest and Co-Writer/Actor Eugene Levy and a handful of deleted scenes with commentary, but those few deleted scenes are just as good as the stuff they left in, and it’s a well known fact that there are hours of improve footage that never saw the screen. It’s time we finally got to see the best of what was left out, not to mention a look back from the cast at what has held its place as Guest’s best post-This Is Spinal Tap work.

9. Grosse Pointe Blank

Grosse Pointe Blank is so old, it still has the “Wide Screen Digitally Mastered” banner on the cover that adorned every Disney / Buena Vista DVD when words like that still excited consumers. This film may not have made much of an impact when it was first released, getting lost amidst a sea of quirky hitmen in the wake of Pulp Fiction, but the John Cusack comedy has gained quite a cult following over the years, and could definitely benefit from a commentary track, some deleted scenes, and a featurette on the killer soundtrack.

8. Borat

Much like Waiting For Guffman, you know there are hours and hours of footage that could’ve been added to this disc, but all we get is a few deleted scenes, a press tour, and a music infomercial, all entertaining but this could’ve been so much more. Sacha Baron Cohen did some great commentary tracks for both seasons of Da Ali G Show…hell, he even did an in character commentary for Ali G Indahouse! Doesn’t the beloved Borat deserve the same?

7. To Die For

Here’s a perfect candidate for a Criterion upgrade. A prophetic, sexy dark comedy from a director who’s no stranger to the Collection (with Criterion editions of Gus Van Sant’s Mala Noche and My Own Private Idaho already available). Get some new interviews with Nicole Kidman (never sexier than she is here), Van Sant, Matt Dillon, Buck Henry, and Joaquin Phoenix (good luck), throw in a commentary, some deleted scenes, and the novel by Joyce Maynard and you got a package that’s…yeah, I can’t resist…to die for.

6. Sex, Lies, And Videotape

While the Steven Soderbergh commentary was definitely appreciated, Sex, Lies, And Videotape deserves a bit more. We’re talking about one of the most important independent films ever made, and while it may not have started the movement, it certainly lit the fire. A nice retrospective with interviews with all the major players and a look at the films influence would be welcomed supplemental features.

5. Ghost World

Okay, the deleted scenes already included on the existing version are pretty great, and the inclusion of the “Jaan Pehechaan Ho” video is definitely a nice touch. But who wouldn’t love a commentary track with Creator/Co-writer Daniel Clowes and Director/Co-writer Terry Zwigoff? Admittedly though, this is a very selfish entry. I just really want a double dip of Ghost World because I feel like too many people have forgotten this film, easily one of the best comedies of the decade.

4. The Dark Knight

“But there’s already a Dark Knight special edition” you may be saying as you read this. And you’re right, but ask yourself this: Is it really all that “special?” A bunch of featurettes that were ran on cable to promote the theatrical release might be okay for any regular blockbuster, but this movie was an obsession for many people. We’d all seen these featurettes again and again. Yes, it would’ve been even worse had they not been included, but we certainly could’ve used something new. This is the second biggest movie of all time though, so expect triple, even quadruple dips.

3. Annie Hall

At the very least, it’d be nice to get an anamorphic transfer of one of Director Woody Allen’s greatest films. Even better would be to at least see some extra features aside from the theatrical trailer. I’ve read that Allen himself requested that the release of Annie Hall only include the trailer, and if that’s the case, I can’t argue with the man’s wishes. And while I’m not expecting a full commentary from Allen, it’d be nice to see reflections from people like Tony Roberts, Carol Kane, Christopher Walken, and of course the woman who made neck ties on females hot, Diane Keaton.

2. South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Maybe it was the fact that it was one of Paramount’s earlier DVD releases or maybe it had more to do with its underwhelming box office, but South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut remains a single dip disc, with only three trailers provided as extras. Certainly creators Trey Parker & Matt Stone could work up full length commentary for what remains of South Park's greatest achievements. There are rumors of Blu-ray release on the horizons, so hopefully we can expect an upgrade on both formats.

1. Dick Tracy

The PG-13 cut! Where is it?! Warren Beatty’s underrated visual masterpiece was given the shaft when it was released in 2002 (although it was given the courtesy of a DTS track). Around the time of its original DVD release, there were rumors of a planned Vista Series release, but that line seems to have been halted altogether. Dick Tracy is a movie that would look absolutely gorgeous on Blu-ray, so hopefully when it gets called up to the high def majors, a much needed upgrade will see the light of day.

Not Another Most Anticipated Films Of 2009 List

2008-12-31T14:38:00.018-05:00

Two is always better than one, so we're giving you another perspective on what we'll all be watching and, in some cases, lining up for at midnight for throughout the year. Some of you may think there are some glaring omissions on my list, such as Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen, Terminator: Salvation, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but recent images and trailers from those films have deflated my expectations. And while it's unlikely that 2009 will be able to top the massive box office that hits like The Dark Knight and Iron Man helped bring in, names like Tarantino, Cameron, Apatow, and Snyder are set to make sure you don't decide to start using that library card this year.

10. Public Enemies
I can't pretend for a second that I enjoyed 2006's boring and overly-moody Miami Vice, a film that sucked all the fun out of the '80s hit TV series. But I am a Michael Mann's man, and the with Johnny Depp as legendary bank robber John Dillinger and the always reliable Christian Bale as Melvin Purvis, the G-man out to stop him, this has little chance of disappointing.

Countdown to: July 1st 2009

9. Whatever Works
While I don't remember ever highly anticipating a Woody Allen film, I have counted the days before every season of Larry David's hilarious HBO series Curb Your Enthusiasm. David seems to be stepping in as Woody's alter ego, a crumudggeon who somehow attracts a beautiful young woman, Evan Rachel Wood this time around. Woody's track record has improved greatly since a pretty rocky patch of late '90s/early 2000 films, and with these two comedy greats collaborating, we'll either see a comedy classic or heads exploding in theaters due to neurotic overload.

Countdown to: TBA

8. Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
Oringinally scheduled for release this past November, Warner Bros. pushed the release of the sixth potter film to July 2009 to bulk up their less than impressive summer slate. Since Azkaban, the Potter films have entered a darker realm, increasing their appeal to a mass audience with each film. Plus, you can finally check out Emma Watson without feeling like a total perv...although you should still feel like a bit of a perv.

Countdown to: July 17th 2009

7. Up
I know very little about this film other than a trailer that features balloons, a flying house, and a grumpy old man. And it's Pixar. I'd watch Pixar animating the phone book, so I'm sold.

Countdown to: May 29th 2009

6. Bruno
Thankfully I greatly overrestimated the size of Borat-fever in 2006, and didn't have to put up with nearly as many morons saying "Very nice" over and over again (although somehow I still hear the occasional "Yeah baby!" from Austin Powers). Sacha Baron Cohen's undercover antics as Bruno have gained much more coverage in the press than he did while making Borat, possibly ruining the surprise for both the patsies and the audience. And although Bruno may be Cohen's least popular creation, I still have a feeling he'll have us all saying "Vassup" by summer's end.

Countdown to: May 15th 2009

5. Funny People
After once reading an interview where Judd Apatow described The 40-Year-Old Virgin as a James L. Brooks movie on anphetamines, I assumed it was only a matter of time before he tried his hand at an actual James L. Brooks movie. He's even bringing along Spanglish star Adam Sandler, not to mention tons of other funny people like Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Aziz Ansari, and the previously only funny in Australia, Eric Bana. Let's just hope this turns out as a Judd Apatow movie with Adam Sandler in it instead of a Adam Sanlder movie that happens to be directed by Judd Apatow.

Countdown to: July 31st 2009

4. Star Trek
Although it's being written off by some Trekkies as Star Trek: 90210, the action-packed (and yes, sexy) trailer gives us a glimpse at a Trek that might go where no Trek film has gone before: mass appeal. And while I completely understand the anger die-hard Trek fans may have over the selling out of the franchise (not to mention questionable choices that contradict the established cannon), I implore the frustrated to take a wait and see approach. At least Scott Bakula's nowhere in sight.

Countdown to: May 8th 2009

3. Inglorious Basterds
I've read about it since not long after the release of 1997's Jackie Brown, but it looks like 2009 is going to be the year that we finally get to see Quentin Tarantino's WWII film. The cast list has been a revolving door almost since the beginning, with names as diverse as Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, Tim Roth, and Adam Sandler all being tossed around at various stages. Tarantino's settled on a Nazi-killing platoon that includes Hostel director Eli Roth, The Office's BJ Novak, and Freaks & Geeks Samm Levine, all headed up by Brad Pitt as Lt. Aldo Raine.

Countdown to: August 21st, 2009

2. Watchmen
As long as Fox doesn't stop it's release, we only have to wait a short 3 months for what's almost guaranteed to be the first blockbuster of 2009. Zack Snyder may have polarized critics with the testosterone-filled 300, but this time around he's got Alan Moore's classic graphic novel as source material, which Time Magazine called one of the best novels of the 20th century.

Countdown to: March 6th 2009 (Fingers crossed)

1. Avatar
Sorry Nickelodeon fans, I'm not talking about The Last Airbender. I'm talking about James Cameron's long awaited follow-up to Titanic. Very little is known about the film (I'm not even sure if that alien is legit), but we do know it's about a group of humans clashing with a humanoid species on their planet, it's being shot in a revolutionary 3D mix of computer animation and live action, and Sigourney Weaver's in it. Last time Weaver and Cameron worked together, the result was Aliens, so yeah, stakes is high.

Countdown to: December 18th, 2009

Disagree with the picks on either of our lists? Submit your own in the comments section!

Top Ten Movies I Can't Wait To See In 2009

2008-12-31T13:59:00.038-05:00

2009 is less than 10 hours away, and I am super excited because it means that the movies I'm looking forward to seeing the most are even closer to being released!

Many of these movies are sequels to films or adaptations of books (some just look like they'll be a great time) that I love and treasure, so listing these films in order from the ones I want to see a lot to the ones I want to see even more is pretty difficult. Without real organization or thought to placement, here they are:

10. Angels & Demons - Release Date: May 15, 2009

I liked the book Angels & Demons better than The Da Vinci Code, and with added star power of Ewan McGregor, this movie has potential to be better than the first one. (Which is odd, because, technically, Angels & Demons should have been the first because it was published first.)

9. The Year One - Release Date: June 19, 2009

(There aren't any real pictures for The Year One yet, so a picture of Olivia Wilde, who plays a princess in the film, is going to have to suffice.) Jack Black and Michael Cera play two men who, when exiled from their primitive tribe, travel the globe and meet famous Biblical figures in this Monty Python-esque movie.

8. Adventureland - Release Date: March 27, 2009

Adventureland, like Zach & Miri Make A Porno, was filmed in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I like seeing movies that were filmed in the area where I live because it makes the mental escape the movies provide much more realistic. In fact, I know exactly where those two actors in that scene are standing. How cool is that?!

7. Youth In Revolt - Release Date: April 3, 2009

(Also, no pictures yet for Youth In Revolt, so please accept this photo of Michael Cera, the lead in the movie, from a different movie as a substitute.) I read Youth In Revolt several years ago, and the book found a place in my heart. I'm interested in seeing Michael Cera in the role of Nick Twisp, seeing as the only parts I've seen Cera play have been sweet and somewhat socially awkward males. Either way, it'll be entertaining!

6. Brüno - Release Date: May 15, 2009

Sacha Baron Cohen is back as Bruno, the gay Austrian fashion/gossip reporter who can't help but offend just as many people as Borat did! As a fan of Da Ali G Show and its spin-offs, I can't wait to see what Bruno does in this movie!

5. Up - Release Date: May 29, 2009

Before the most recent children's movie I saw, the preview for Up played, and I was immediately hooked. Was the old, curmudgeonly man who just wanted to get away, or was it the terrified Boy Scout clinging to the house being lifted higher into the air by balloons? I can't say for sure, but I know I need to see this!

4. Star Trek - Release Date: May 8, 2009

Although I wasn't the biggest fan of the original Star Trek series or the movies (I personally love Star Trek 4...so what if there are whales in it?), but I'm still interested in seeing the story about how the original (original meaning Star Trek, not Star Trek: Enterprise) crew of the Enterprise came together.

3. Land of the Lost - Release Date: June 5, 2009

My childhood was full of great television shows, such as Land of the Lost, so when I heard they were remaking one of my most favorite childhood shows into a movie starring Will Ferrell, I knew that the powers-that-be had the right combination for a great movie!

2. Terminator: Salvation - Release Date: May 22, 2009

I have always enjoyed the Terminator franchise (in ALL of its forms!), and I can't imagine that this sequel will change that fact!

1. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince - Release Date: July 17, 2009

It's weird to think that the first Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone was published when I was just 13 years old. Now I'm almost 25, and the thought that I'm too old for these movies has never crossed my mind. The Harry Potter series has never disappointed me, either in print or on film, and although I'll be one of the first in line to see this, I do recognize that I'm too old to dress up in "wizarding" costumes. (Fact: I have never dressed up in a costume to go see a movie.)

Top Ten Music Cues From Freaks And Geeks

2008-12-11T01:08:00.022-05:00

This won't be a list where I lament the premature cancellation of one of the greatest shows ever televised. No, this is a time to rejoice thanks to the recent Shout Factory release of Freaks And Geeks: The Complete Series - Yearbook Edition, previously only available directly from the Freaks And Geeks website. With 2 extra bonus discs and an 80 page year book packed with rare photos and more, it's a must own for any Freaks And Geeks fan. But don't worry budget conscious consumer, the also excellent 6 disc Complete Series is available. So here now are my picks for the best music cues of the series, no easy task when dealing with a soundtrack this eclectic and expansive.

10. "Let The Good Times Roll" by The Cars from the episode The Garage Door
After finding a mysterious garage door opener in his father's car, Neil sets out to find the door it belongs to, with the help of the always reliable geeks Sam and Bill. As the trio rolls around aimlessly, Neil pointing the clicker at every garage they pass, it becomes clear that the good times will be less frequent for the Schweiber's.

9. "You're Nobody 'Til Somebody Loves You" by Dean Martin from the episode Noshing And Moshing
A rare, out of period music selection for the series, Dean Martin's timeless crooning plays over a montage featuring Daniel, bruised and partially pierced, returning to Kim's open arms, Neil temporarily coming to terms with his father's infidelity, a tense moment between the Schweiber's, and the hilariously drunk Weir's stumbling home.

8. "Look Sharp" by Joe Jackson from the episode Looks And Books
In a desperate attempt to impress his dream girl Cindy Sanders, super stud Sam Weir struts into school feeling confident in his brand new duds...but confidence never lasts long for the geeks.

7. "Love Reign O'er Me" by The Who from Dead Dogs And Gym Teachers
While happily enjoying a bowl of Count Chocula, Bill is confronted with the uncomfortable reality that gym teacher Mr. Fredricks has spent the night at his house. Perhaps no other band conveys the kind of teenage angst that The Who found second nature (okay, The Kinks, but that's really Wes Anderson territory), which is why this is their first of two appearances on this list.

6. "Ripple" by The Grateful Dead from the episode Discos And Dragons
The final song of the series, the bittersweet Grateful Dead tune from the Mr. Rosso approved American Beauty album plays as Lindsay waves goodbye to her family and says hello to her new Deadhead friends.

5. "Come Sail Away" by Styx from the episode Pilot
After Sam works up the nerve to ask Cindy Sanders for the dance she promised, the two slowly navigate the dance floor look for a spot, but before you know it, the song begins "to carry on..." and Sam's first slow dance with a girl becomes his first fast dance with a girl. Also going on, Lindsay making ammends with Eli and rocking out in her green army jacket.

4. "You'll Accomp'ny Me" by Bob Seger from the episode Smooching And Mooching
Bill enjoys 7 minutes in heaven with Vicki Appleby after charming the pants off of her with lines from The Jerk (what woman could resist?), while Sam finds out that Cindy Sanders is not quite as delicate as she looks.

3. "Spirit Of The Radio" by Rush from the episode I'm With The Band
Nothing conveys the awesome feeling of playing the drums (poorly) better than Nick Andopolis banging along with Neal Peart on "Spirit Of The Radio."

2. "Rosalinda's Eyes" by Billy Joel from the episode Carded And Discarded
As the geeks spend the afternoon shooting off rockets with the new girl Maureen, the mood is set by the sounds of the king of suburban romance, Billy Joel.

1. "I'm One" by The Who from the episode Dead Dogs And Gym Teachers
There has never been a more perfect depiction of the type of bliss associated with after school relaxation than Bill kicking back with a grilled cheese sandwich and chocolate cake as he toasts Garry Shandling stand-up with a glass of milk as the Quadrophenia classic plays.

Bonus:

"Lady L" by Jason Segel from the episode Dead Dogs And Gym Teachers
No words necessary. Just watch.

----------------
Now playing: The Who - I'm One
via FoxyTunes

Legends Of The Fall

2008-10-03T10:24:00.017-04:00

Fall movie season is here, and with it comes a slew of Oscar bait and "important" films. But don't worry action and comedy fans, we've got you covered too. Here are our top 10 must see movies this fall.

10. Valkyrie

Generally speaking, movies that have switched release dates as many times as Valkyrie has don't inspire confidence. But after positive test screenings, United Artists gained a new found confidence in the film and decided it was worthy of an award's season release. Add to that a riveting trailer (despite a somewhat dodgy German accent from Tom Cruise...or lack thereof), and you've got a film that could put Cruise back on top.

Opens: December 26th

9. Australia

Admittedly I'm not the biggest Baz Luhrmann fan, but even I can't deny the extraordinary images found in the trailer for Australia. Plus, no singing, no anachronisms...Luhrmann may have just made a movie I can sit through.

Opens: November 26th, December 5th (Wide)

8. Milk

Sean Penn playing gay politician Harvey Milk, in a film directed by Gus Van Sant. I wonder if this will get Oscar nominations?

Opens: November 26th (Limited)

7. Changeling

Clint Eastwood's been on a directing hot streak recently, so I'll go see pretty much anything with his name on it...like say, a period drama about a mother (Angelina Jolie) whose son is kidnapped and returned - only she doesn't believe it's her son.

Opens: October 24th (Limited), October 31st (Wide)

6. Revolutionary Road

If you were a teenage girl in 1997, you've probably been waiting for the reunion of Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet longer than baby boomers had to wait for Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan to reunite in You've Got Mail. Thankfully, Revolutionary Road looks like it has a bit more substance and very little chance of turning into a two hour commercial for AOL.

Opens: December 26th (Limited)

5. W.

Too soon? W. looks to either be the most entertaining film ever made about a U.S. President or a giant trainwreck. Director Oliver Stone has said the film is not a "hatchet job" on the legacy of our 43rd President, but the teaser poster filled with "Bush-ims" suggests otherwise.

Opens: October 17th (Limited)

4. Zack & Miri Make A Porno

Two in a row for Elizabeth Banks (also in W.), who co-stars with Seth Rogen in Zack & Miri Make A Porno, in which the titular slackers are forced to make a skin flick to come up with rent money. Early word says it's writer/director Kevin Smith's best in years.

Opens: October 31st

3. The Road

Author Cormac McCarthy's No Country For Old Men won last year's Best Picture Academy Award. This year, McCarthy invades cinemas with Oprah Book Club favorite The Road, starring Viggo Mortensen as a father navigating a post-apocalyptic wasteland with his son. Director John Hilcoat (The Proposition) may not be able to top the Coen Brothers' masterpiece, but he should at least be able to wash the bad taste of the I Am Legend climax out of our mouths.

Opens: November 14th (Limited), November 26th (Wide) - POSTPONED FOR RELEASE IN 2009

2. Quantum Of Solace

After a much needed revamp in Casino Royale, Daniel Craig brings his no nonsense Bond back for revenge in Quantum Of Solace. Questionable title aside, the most recent trailer for the film looks absolutely amazing, and with a 106 minute running time (the shortest of any Bond film), this looks like it could be the most action packed Bond yet.

Opens: November 14th

1. The Wrestler

Considering that there hasn't even been an official trailer for The Wrestler yet, I only have early word of mouth to go by on this one. That early word of mouth consists of across the board praise for the film, the best reviews Mickey Rourke's gotten in years, and the Golden Lion at The Venice Film Festival. So you could say the word of mouth is not to shabby on this one.

Opens: December 19th

Top 10 Double Dips

2008-09-04T11:25:00.017-04:00

Double dips. As DVD collector's, we have a love/hate relationship with them. On the plus side, you're getting all new bonus materials, possibly a new a/v transfer, and all sorts of other goodies. On the downside, you're probably paying for a movie you already purchased once. So what's worth your double dip dollar? Here are ten double dips we think are worth the upgrade.

10. Pulp Fiction

Original Release Date: May 20th, 1998

Double Dip Date: August 20th, 2002

Originally released as a bare bones single disc, die-hards new there was way more bonus material to be had, and some of us were able to patiently wait for a release worthy of the Criterion laserdisc. Even if you did purchase the original, there's not doubt you traded up thanks to handsome packaging, two discs loaded with bonus materials, and a Jack Rabbit Slim's menu included as the insert. A must upgrade for any Tarantino devotee.

9. Dogma

Original Release Date: May 2nd, 2000

Double Dip date: June 26th, 2001

Even in the format's infancy, Kevin Smith established himself as a huge supporter of supplimental material on his discs, with stellar releases of Chasing Amy and Mallrats. So when word came that his controversial 1999 film Dogma was being released with no special features, it came as a bit of a head scratcher. Thankfully, Smith's fantastic relationship with his fanbase made it clear that a special edition was in the works, so those of us in the know saved our hard earned dollar and the faithfull were duly rewarded with two of Smith's infamous commentary tracks, deleted scenes, and more, not to mention sweet Indiana Jones-esque cover art. DVD collectors can probably guess which Smith title we'll be seeing later on in the list.

8. Close Encounters Of The Third Kind

Original Release Date: May 29th, 2001

Double Dip Date: November 13th, 2007

Any double dip with multiple versions of the same film is always going to be an easy second purchase. The 30th Anniversary Edition of Close Encoutners Of The Third Kind collected all three versions of the film (theatrical, special edition, and director's cut), a collector's book, comparison poster, and more. The Blu-Ray edition is of course the preferred choice, but either way you'll be getting the most complete Close Encounters package you'll ever need.

7. Seven Samurai

Original Release Date: March 16th, 1999

Double Dip Date: September 5th, 2006

It's not often that Criterion feels the need to go back and add suppliments to their already loaded releases, but as the company's second DVD release, Seven Samurai was a little lite on the features. Due to it's 203 minute running time, it only included an audio commentary with Japanese film expert Michael Jeck and a theatrical trailer, all on the dreaded flipper disc. The 2006 release (our #1 DVD of that year) made right that wrong, spreading the film onto two discs, and threw in a bonus third disc of suppliments, including the Seven Samurai segment of Akira Kurosawa: It Is Wonderful To Create, a now standard bonus feature on almost all of Criterion's Kurosawa releases.

6. Superman: The Movie

Original Release Date: May 1st, 2001

Double Dip Date: November 28th, 2006

If the idea of owning Superman III and Superman IV: The Quest For Peace kept you from purchasing the stunning Superman Ultimate Collector's Edition, you still owe it to yourself to pick up the 4 disc special edition. Featuring both the theatrical cut and the 2000 expanded edition, this double dip includes hours of features, such as featurettes covering all aspects of production, 9 Fleischer Superman cartoons, and the 1951 George Reeves movie Superman And The Mole Men.

5. Sin City: Unrated, Recut & Extended

Original Release Date: August 16th, 2005

Double Dip Date: December 13th, 2005

Here's a double dip we all saw coming. Director Robert Rodriguez has never been one to skimp on extra features, so when Sin City arrived in August of 2006 with just a behind-the-scenes featurette, it was clear more was to come. Rodriquez didn't dissapoint, giving Unrated, Recut & Extended buyers the option of watching the original theatrical cut, or watching each story seperately (with extra gore), as they were originally published by creator Frank Miller. You also get commentaries by Rodriguez, Miller and guest director Quentin Tarantino, featurettes, and the graphic novel version of The Hard Goodbye. Sadly, there's still no deleted Jessica Alba - Alexis Bledel make-out scene...I know it exists, it has to!

4. Zodiac: Director's Cut

Original Release Date: July 24th, 2007

Double Dip Date: January 8th, 2008

David Fincher's 2007 masterpiece Zodiac was one of the most intensely thorough prodedural thrillers released in recent memory, so when the bare bones DVD arrived in July of 2007, many fans smelled a rat. Turns out the smell was coming from the insert included in the DVD case, which announced the coming 2 disc Director's cut. Paramount delievered the goods though, putting out a set so filled with suppliments on every aspect of filming and more importantly, the actual Zodiac killings, that it's possibly the closest any studio has ever come to touching what Criterion does best.

3. Clerks X

Original Release Date: June 29th, 1999

Double Dip Date: September 7th, 2004

Kevin Smith's second appearance on our countdown is the tenth anniversary of his classic debut Clerks, Clerks X, a set that upgraded an already decent Collector's Edition (that virtually mirrored the laserdisc release) with a massive 3 discs. The theatrical cut and the original version of the film are included, with two commentaries, one being a video commentary for the original cut. The audio and video has been cleaned up, and highlights include an animated "Lost Scene" featuring Joey Lauren Adams, and the feature length documentary "Snowball Effect: The Making Of Clerks."

2. The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring - New Line Platinum Series

Original Release Date: August 6th, 2002

Double Dip Date: November 12th, 2002

Without question, The Lord Of The Rings films set the gold standard with the release of the extended version of The Fellowship Of The Ring. Not only did Peter Jackson add 30 minutes to the theatrical cut, he did the right thing and spread the film across two discs, to make space for a beautiful transfer, DTS ES and Dolby Digital EX audio options, and an audio commentary track with over 30 participants. The other two discs include several production featurettes, all beautiful laid out in a branching menu scheme. To top it all off, all three came packaged gorgeously, more at home in a library than on a DVD shelf.

1. Blade Runner: 5 Disc Ultimate Edition

Original Relase Date: March 26th, 1997

Double Dip Date: December 18th, 2007

Possibly one of the greatest DVDs ever released, the 5 disc Ultimate Edition of Blade Runner upgrades the previously released Director's Cut, one of the first titles released on the DVD format. This is as complete a package any die hard fan could ask for, including the final cut, the director's cut, the theatrical version, the European cut and the ultra rare workprint version that arguably started the public's fascination with the manly incarnations of Blade Runner. While Blu-Ray and HD-DVD owners could obtain the workprint with the standard or briefcase releases, DVD owners were forced to purchase the briefcase if they wanted the workprint. But oh what a set it is, with an oragami unicorn, die-cast toy Spinner, a motion film clip, hours of special features and more. To paraphrase Roy Batty, "Time to buy."

Men Amongst Men: Top Ten Badasses On Film

2008-07-07T12:30:00.004-04:00

Everyday people come up to me and ask "Allan, you're so unbelievably intimidating and irresistible to women, how can I be more like you?" The answer is you can't. But I'm here from downtown, I'm here on a mission of mercy, and by studying these ten shining examples of masculinity, you'll be one step closer.

10. John Bender - The Breakfast Club

9. Richie - Over The Edge

8. Ordell Robbie - Jackie Brown

7. John McClane - Die Hard

6. Frank T.J. Mackey - Magnolia

5. Travis Bickle - Taxi Driver

4. Harry Callahan - Dirty Harry

3. Bud White - L.A. Confidential

2. Francis Begbie - Trainspotting

1. Blake - Glengarry Glen Ross

My Top Ten Favorite Movies To Watch On July 4th

2008-07-03T09:54:00.019-04:00

The Fourth of July is upon us, and in the spirit of the holiday, I have decided to share the 10 movies that I like to watch on this day. These are the movies that remind me what it means to be an American, as well as what difficulties were endured to create the United States of America that we know and love today. They may not all be based on real events, but they all capture the strength and rebelliousness of the American spirit.

And in no particular order:

1. The Patriot

Best Quote: Benjamin Martin (Mel Gibson): "Before this war is over, I'm going to kill you."

2. Glory

Best Quote: Col. Robert G. Shaw (Matthew Broderick): "If you men will take no pay, then none of us will."

3. Independence Day

Best Quote (tied!):

Capt. Steve Hiller (Will Smith): "Welcome to Earth!"

President Thomas Whitmore (Bill Pullman): "Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!"

4. Forrest Gump

Best Quote: Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks): "Mama always said life was like a box a chocolates, never know what you're gonna get."

5. The Last Castle

Best Quote: Lt. Gen. Eugene Irwin (Robert Redford): "Colonel. I'm taking command of your prison"

6. Band of Brothers

Best Quote: Maj. Richard D. Winters (Damien Lewis): "We're not lost, Private... we're in Normandy."

7. Saving Private Ryan

Best Quote: Capt. John H. Miller (Tom Hanks): "Earn this."

8. Serenity

Best Quote: Capt. Malcolm Reynolds (Nathan Fillion): "Sure as I know anything, I know this - they will try again. Maybe on another world, maybe on this very ground swept clean. A year from now, ten? They'll swing back to the belief that they can make people... better. And I do not hold to that. So no more runnin'. I aim to misbehave. "

9. Behind Enemy Lines

Best Quote: Admiral Leslie McMahon Reigart (Gene Hackman): "Zero-six, you've been shot down, life is tough. You're a combat aviator, start acting like one. Remember your training, put some angles between you and your pursuers. Evade and survive, and we will bring you home. You got that? We will bring you home"

10. Black Hawk Down

Best Quote: Eversmann (Josh Hartnett): "Nobody asks to be a hero, it just sometimes turns out that way. "

Have a safe and happy Fourth of July!

Top Ten Valentines I Hope To Receive In February 2009

2008-05-19T14:15:00.033-04:00

Yeah, yeah, I know that Valentine's Day is more than half a year away, but a girl can dream, can't she?

Cheesy or not, here are the top ten Valentine's Day cards I hope to receive next Valentine's Day:

(Valentine's Day card creators: take note!)

1. Iron Man/Robert Downey, Jr.

2. The Dark Knight/Christian Bale

3. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull/Harrison Ford & Shia LaBeouf

4. The Happening/Mark Wahlberg

5. The Incredible Hulk/Edward Norton

6. Tropic Thunder/Ben Stiller with a bonus Robert Downey, Jr.!

7. Wall*E/Wall*E

8. What Happens In Vegas/Ashton Kutcher

9. The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian/Ben Barnes

10. Get Smart/Steve Carell

Ten Directors On The Verge Of Greatness

2008-03-28T13:59:00.024-04:00

Every great director has at least one film that makes the world take notice. For Quentin Tarantino it was Pulp Fiction, for Paul Thomas Anderson it was Boogie Nights (although one could arguably swap that moment for There Will Be Blood). That elusive classic doesn't just happen though. Some filmmakers seem destined for greatness with only a few films under their belt, while some may take a lifetime to achieve immortality. Here are ten directors in a heated race for glory.

10. Noah Baumbach
After his impressive 1995 directorial debut Kicking And Screaming, Noah Baumbach seemed to disappear off the radar. 2005's The Squid And The Whale, a painfully hilarious semi-autobiographical tale about divorce, became a critical darling and brought Baumbach back into the limelight. His 2007 film Margot At The Wedding only confirmed his talents for capturing ugliness in a humorous context. While his films often draw comparison to those of Wes Anderson (possibly due to their collaboration of The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou), Baumbach's films take place in the real world, as opposed to Anderson's exaggerated literary fantasy worlds. This may be why Baumbach has not obtained the cult following that Anderson enjoys, as his settings may seem too familiar for comfort. His talents are obvious though; it's not Baumbach who needs to strive for his great film...the audience needs to be ready for it.

9. Greg Mottola
Greg Mottola's directorial debut, the completely enjoyable comedy The Daytrippers, was a hit at Sundance in a year when there were too many hits at Sundance, and therefore got lost in the shuffle. He spent the next ten years of his career working in television, on quality shows such as Undeclared and Arrested Development. His Judd Apatow connection on Undeclared helped him land the 2007 sleeper hit Superbad, which carried the blessing and curse of being an Apatow production (guaranteed talent and quality, little recognition for Mottola as director). Mottola's next film, Adventureland, could be a Superbad-style sleeper hit, hopefully with praise being rightfully given to Mottola's direction this time around.

8. Allen Coulter
Give a quick glimpse at Allen Coulter's resume and you'll notice he's directed a lot of television. Upon closer inspection, you'll notice 27 episodes of The Sopranos, including some of the series' best, such as "The Test Dream," "College," and my personal favorite, the extremely brutal "University." It's clear Coulter has already made his mark on the world of television, and his well crafted feature debut Hollywoodland proved that Coulter is someone you can expect great things from in the future.

7. Doug Liman
Doug Liman made his directorial debut in 1994 with Getting In, but everyone took notice two years later when he directed the film that launched the careers of Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn, Swingers. To some, Swingers may not seem like a directorial tour de force, but when you take into consideration that the film was made for a meager $200,000, thanks to Liman's ability to shoot technically complicated shots on the cheap, you might change your mind. After Swingers came Go, a highly underrated comedy that too many critics wrote off as Pulp Fiction for teens. Recently Liman's shifted his focus to action, having helmed The Bourne Identity, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and Jumper in the past decade.

6. Mary Harron
Mary Harron started her career as a journalist for Punk magazine in the 1970's (she was the first person to interview The Sex Pistols for an American publication), and didn't make her directorial debut until 1996 with I Shot Andy Warhol. She followed Warhol in 2000 with the extremely controversial American Psycho, based on the equally controversial novel by Bret Easton Ellis. The film received mixed reviews, and Harron didn't return to features until 2005's Bettie Page biopic, The Notorious Bettie Page, which many saw as a triumphant return to form. It would seem as if Harron's talents lie in period pieces, which leads one to wonder if her great film is possibly set in the 1970's punk scene she's so familiar with...or if that subject is too close for comfort?

5. Robert Rodriguez
Some of you may think this pick is completely unjustified and that Robert Rodriguez has already made his mark on the world of cinema, and some of you may believe that immortality isn't even within his reach. My opinion of Rodriguez lies somewhere in the middle. He certainly knows how to make kick ass genre pics (Desperado), he's a technological pioneer (Sin City), and he's even made a great family film (Spy Kids). Still, for all the bang his films provide, there's not much substance. Perhaps he's guilty of stretching himself too thin. Rodriguez multi-tasks on all his films by directing, writing, shooting, editing, and often composing. The fact that his most successful outing, Sin City, was based on source material by Frank Miller, may suggest that he hand over the writing duties to someone else next time, so he can focus his attentions on the things he does best...although it should be noted that he did not receive a writing credit for The Faculty (that honor(?) goes to Dawson's Creek creator Kevin Williamson).

4. Peter Berg
An accomplished actor before he turned his attentions behind the camera, Peter Berg began his directing career with the 1998 dark (extremely dark) comedy, Very Bad Things, an insanely divisive film that audiences either applauded for its mix of no holds barred violence and tasteless humor or reviled for the very same reasons. Still, he seemed like just another unnecessary actor turned director until his 2004 adaptation of the H.G. Bissinger novel, Friday Night Lights, which was a refreshingly realistic (I'm looking at you, Varsity Blues) look at a small Texas town and its obsession with high school football. The film also spawned an even better TV show, developed by Berg. Personally, the moment I started to suspect Berg had more up his sleeve was during the climatic shootout in The Kingdom, one of the most riveting action sequences I've seen in years in an otherwise mediocre film. Berg's next movie, the Will Smith vehicle Hancock, should be his first major box office hit, but my money says 2010's Dune will make or break Berg as a serious filmmaker.

3. Craig Brewer
2005's Hustle & Flow established Craig Brewer as the current king of southern fried cinema, capturing the desperate poverty of south without ever coming off as heavy handed or losing its soul. Brewer's follow-up, Black Snake Moan, was a brilliant spin on the sexploitation genre that never found the audience it deserved, possibly due to sensationalist marketing. With the south mostly relegated to outdated stereotypes or inaccurate nostalgia on film, Brewer seems poised to be the man to bring us an accurate portrayal of one of the most poorly represented regions of this country on film.

2. Darren Aronofsky
Darren Aronofsky exploded into the film world at the 1998 Sundance Film Festival with his feature-length debut Pi, where he won the award for Best Director. He followed Pi with Requiem For A Dream, which some may consider his "great film," but let's face it: the film doesn't retain the mindf*@k it gives the viewer on the initial viewing (how could it?). His last film, The Fountain, was regarded by most as extremely ambitious, but somewhat of a mess. Early shots from Aronofsky's next film, The Wrestler, look extremely promising, and if that doesn't work out, the similarly-themed The Fighter follows.

1. Tony Scott
With a filmography that anyone would be lucky to achieve, it may seem odd to find Tony Scott in the number one position. But let's face it, with all the ground he's covered, not one film in his career screams "classic." There are the blockbusters (Top Gun, Crimson Tide), the cult favorites (True Romance, Revenge) and the just god-awful (Beverly Hills Cop II, The Fan). The man is clearly a technical master, and in recent years his films have adopted a very grainy, overexposed look (Domino, Man On Fire), that you either love or hate. There's no doubt he has a great film within him. Still, with remakes of The Taking Of Pelham 123 and The Warriors on the horizon, I don't see it happening anytime soon.

Top Ten Guiltiest Movie And Television Pleasures

2008-03-26T16:21:00.043-04:00

When it comes to movies and television, we act hip and cool to the trends, but deep down inside, there are those certain movies and television shows that we hold dear to our hearts, regardless of what others may say or think about them. They are our guilty pleasures, and fear not - there isn't any real guilt that goes along with liking them, just an increased feeling of defensiveness when other people poke fun at them.

Without further ado, I present the movies and television shows that I have seen numerous times and still cause me to adhere to the couch for hours, even if I just said I'd come bail you out of jail in 20 minutes. (Oh hush, you're not going anywhere!)

10. The Emperor's New Groove

I think I spent a good 2 or 3 years watching and re-watching this fantastic animated movie about a spoiled Aztec emperor (David Spade - Awesome!) who gets turned into a llama and must depend on a peasant (John Goodman - Equally awesome!) to help him return to his former self. Throw in Patrick Warburton as the evil adviser's right hand man, and you've got a classic on your hands!

9. French Kiss

Maybe it was because I was taking French in high school at the time, or maybe it was the way Meg Ryan delivered her lines with that characteristic gusto, but my worn-out VHS copy of French Kiss can attest to the fact that I watched America's #1 sweetheart (at the time) over and over again as she tried to win back her ex-fiance's heart with the help of a French criminal/con man.

8. Much Ado About Nothing

I suppose I was a big fan of Shakespeare adaptations when I was younger, but none of them compared to Kenneth Branagh's film version of Shakespeare's comedy Much Ado About Nothing. Michael Keaton's performance, although small, is reason alone to watch this film! The Elizabethan language can be hard to understand, but subtitles should help you get around that.

7. Fiddler On The Roof

TRADITION!! It sounds weird, but I'm really interested in all things Judaism, so it's no surprise that Fiddler On The Roof is one of my favorite films to sit and watch all day. There's love, laughter, and lessons that anyone can relate to, as well as amazing musical numbers!

6. Elf

I don't know what it is about this movie. Maybe it's the large amounts of sugar that Buddy the Elf eats. Maybe it's his elf-out-of-North-Pole ways. Maybe it's in the way he says, "SANTA! I KNOW HIM!" It could be any number of things, but one thing's for certain: I love watching this movie anytime of the year!

5. Pride & Prejudice

There have been countless times I have had to sit and watch the A & E version of this beloved Jane Austen novel. These viewings, which I can only estimate as a bajillion hours a piece, never quite stuck with me because when doing a book report on the novel, I reported that all the sisters got married. (Spoiler alert! Not all of them do!) However, there's something about the Pride & Prejudice version starring Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfadyen that's magical and easy to comprehend, but I feel it is the compactness of the story that endears this movie to me.

4. Pitch Black

For as long as I knew he existed, I had a bit of a vendetta against Vin Diesel. Blame The Fast and The Furious, but I thought he was an awful actor in a movie about cars. Enter Pitch Black, and I discover that Vin Diesel is an awesome action star with a great range of talents and abilities. Pitch Black is the type of movie that people who know me would be surprised to know I love. It's creepy, crawly, and peppered with just the right amount of goriness!

3. Band of Brothers

It doesn't matter how many times I see this fantastic mini-series, I always want to see it again. Unlike Saving Private Ryan, where I fast forward through the parts that make me feel sad, I watch each and every moment of this series. If there's a military holiday coming up, I know to start checking The History Channel for Band of Brothers so I can get my fix!

2. Buffy The Vampire Slayer/Angel

These two television series go hand-in-hand with each other, so they share the same spot. Joss Whedon took everyday problems that young adults deal with and put a supernatural twist on them. I started watching Buffy around my sophomore year in high school, so it was relevant to my life - except the vampires, werewolves, and apocalypses - oh my! I've seen every episode of Buffy (and almost every episode of Angel), and my extensive knowledge of each separate episode and season propels me indefinitely to the status of geek.

1. Firefly

Another Joss Whedon creation! This series never made it past its first season, but that didn't stop its massive fan base from bringing it back from the television graveyard to life on the silver screen in the form of Serenity! I can't get enough of this series, and I own it on DVD, but I'll also watch it on TV because that is the only way you get to hear the special intros to each episode that aren't on the DVDs! For those who have never watched it, Firefly is best described as a western set in outer space. Sounds strange at first, but the story and the world it's set in will grab you and sit you in your chair until it's done entertaining you.

Well, there you have it! I've shown you my guilty pleasures, now let's see yours!

Top Ten Most Confusing Films

2008-03-14T14:48:00.014-04:00

There are the films that we see and we get instantaneously, but then there are the films that are listed below. They don't just serve as entertainment - they encourage discussions about morality and philosophy, but if audiences don't see that second purpose, they'll be lost and confused.

After some research, I came up with a list of the top ten films that many people find confusing and try to give a small explanation about what concept is being examined, as well as maybe a hint or two that will help with understanding the film as well.

Be forewarned, if you have not seen any of these movies yet, there may be spoilers.

(Anything I do give away, with the possible exception of Fight Club, doesn't ruin the movie. I just try to ruin the confusion you feel after watching these movies.)

10. Memento

At the top (bottom?) of our list, we find Memento. Directed by Christopher Nolan, it follows the difficulties a man, Leonard Shelby (Guy Pearce), with short term memory loss experiences while investigating the murder of his wife. Viewers watching this movie will see events play out from different points in time, in either reverse chronological order or chronological order. A second (or third!) viewing can help the audience solve the mysteries of this mystery.

9. A Clockwork Orange

Set in the futuristic 1995 (It was filmed in 1971 by the late Stanley Kubrick.), A Clockwork Orange follows the extremely delinquent Alex DeLarge as he leads his gang of friends on ultra-violent adventures, which include beating up old men, raping women, and basically anything horrible that you could imagine someone doing to another being. After being convicted of murder, he is sentenced to 14 years in prison, but after a couple years, he makes a deal that will get him on parole. He agrees to take part in experimental aversion therapy that the government believes will help neuter criminals, but will the future of that society be better when the government dictates what morality is to the citizens within it and enforces their version of morality?

8. Fight Club

Many people say "Well, I read the book, and when I saw the movie, I wasn't confused at all!" Well, that's because you read the book before you saw the movie based on the book, while others only saw the movie based on the book. Most of the confusion this movie creates is solved by the end, except for the very end, which is hard to understand because of how the dark the scenes are, as well as the massive head wound Edward Norton's character, a man suffering from a split-personality disorder, inflicts upon himself with a gun. By physically pulling the trigger, he mentally exterminated his second personality. He survives because he shoots himself through the cheek, avoiding any important organs or veins.

7. The Matrix\Matrix Reloaded\Matrix Revolutions

The Matrix, starring Keanu Reeves as Neo, introduced the world's audiences to the idea that maybe what we see everyday is just a virtual reality created for us by advanced machines that keep us imprisoned in pods and harvest our energy for their use. Ok, simple enough, I suppose, but then what are we supposed to make of the two sequels, Matrix Reloaded and Matrix Revolutions? It seems to have turned into an exploration of philosophy too dense for the majority of viewers, but if you watch with the idea in mind that it is more a journey or quest, it becomes much easier to understand.

6. Donnie Darko

When Donnie Darko, your average high school student, walks outside his house the night of October 2, he starts experiencing a very strange and realistic hallucination of Frank,a being who wears a grotesque bunny costume. Frank tells Donnie things about the world ending and persuades him to do things, such as burning down a motivational speaker's house. Donnie starts investigating time travel and the opinions surrounding it. By avoiding an event that was predestined to happen, an alternate timeline branches off the main timeline, but eventually, the alternate timeline will not be able to sustain itself and must close or risk destroying the main timeline, and with that, the universe as we know it.

5. Vanilla Sky

David Aames has it all: money, women, fame, etc., etc. However, he loses it all when a jealous lover tries to kill him (The old "If I can't have you, nobody will!" routine), and although he survives, he is horribly disfigured and finds it difficult to return to his life as the way it was. There is no one answer to what this movie is about, but instead, questions are answered with more questions about what it all means. (Which, in my opinion, is way more frustrating than just being unsure of what is going on.) It's a question that has puzzled scientists for decades: what happens to us when we are in a coma or cryogenically frozen? And more specifically, what goes on inside our brain during that time? Do we dream? Or is there just blackness behind our eyes?

4. Revolver

Jake Green is released from prison, and begins to use a formula he and his solitary confinement neighbors developed to win at all types of gambling ventures. He becomes well-known for his "luck", and begins to take his revenge on the man who put him in prison when two men come to him and tell him he has 3 days to live, and they'll protect him (the revenge business is dangerous business!) so long as he gives them all their money. This film is amazing once you remember that everyone is in their own prison and remember that the mind, just like in Fight Club, is a powerful weapon.

3. I Heart Huckabees

The philosophies that are central to the plot in I Heart Huckabees are existentialism and nihilism and absurdism. Existentialists believe that the only meaning in human existence is to exist, so they embrace their existences and create their own meanings for their lives. Nihilists believe that there is no meaning to existence, and any attempt to create meaning is also meaningless because there is no meaning. Absurdists believe that there may be meaning, but humans will never be able to know it, so it's a 50/50 chance that trying to create your own meaning in your life is worth it. Even if you don't understand these philosophies, the movie is still extremely entertaining - just remember that human existence connects everyone, and we are living the lives that we created for ourselves.

2.(Tied for #1) 2001: A Space Odyssey

I, personally, do not get this movie, but I understand that it's about the history of mankind, its present, and its distant future, and the monoliths are the triggers for the changes in mankind's evolution, such as the ape using the old bone as a tool and a weapon. The meaning of this film is up to you and your own personal interpretation, and like me, there will be many people out there who will still be confused even after thinking about it for a long time.

1. Insert Any David Lynch Film That Confuses You Here.

Talk about complicated! Some of his films will give you a hint or a clue to what the meaning behind the movie is by the end, but for some of his films, including INLAND EMPIRE, there is no discernible meaning for the movie's meaning, not to mention the very existence of it. When it comes to David Lynch, I can't help you, so you're on your own. Sorry!

Top Ten Ladies Of The Evening

2008-03-14T10:14:00.025-04:00

The world's oldest profession is making quite a lot of noise these days. To honor the working girls of the world, we've decided to pick our top ten women of ill repute in film. Sorry disgraced politicians, these ladies don't have MySpace pages.

10. The Happy Hooker Trilogy
A hooker so nice, they filmed her thrice! Based on the best selling novel, Xaviera (the Happy Hooker) was portrayed by Lynn Redgrave, Joey Heatherton, and Martine Beswicke.

9. Sin City
Rory Gilmore walking the mean streets of Basin City...what would Lorelai think? Hopefully she'd join her...at least, that's how my fan fiction always ends.

9. Crimes Of Passion
Kathleen Turner may have earned her sex symbol status in Body Heat, but she entered the Hall of Fame as China Blue in Ken Russell's steamy Crimes Of Passion.

7. Working Girls
Call girls for the art house set. Lizzie Borden's 1986 film is a realistic, sometimes comical look at the world of NYC prostitutes, a cinematic world probably closest to what Governor Spitzer was used to.

6. Pretty Woman
The classic Cinderella story...that is if Cinderella was turning tricks on Hollywood Boulevard instead of cleaning up for ungrateful step sisters.

5.Mighty Aphrodite
Mira Sorvino won an Oscar for her portrayal of a squeaky-voiced hooker whose son is adopted by Woody Allen and Helena Bonham Carter. Miraculously, her character never hooks up with Woody, somehow resisting the famous Allen charm.

4. Leaving Las Vegas
Going far beyond the call of duty, Elisabeth Shue stays by her john (Nicolas Cage) as he drinks himself to death. That kind of commitment's gotta look good on a resume.

3. L.A. Confidential
Pierce Patchett can offer you a call girl that looks like any celebrity you desire...including the lovely Kim Basinger as Veronica Lake. Strictly on the hush hush, of course.

2. True Romance
Any hooker than can take a beating from James Gandolfini and still have enough strength to stick him with corkscrew is a keeper in my book.

1. Risky Business
If all you think of is Tom Cruise dancing in his underwear when you think of Risky Business, you haven't seen the movie. The steamy subway sex scene alone is worth the price of admission. Rebecca De Mornay should receive a commission every time a kid from the suburbs hires a call girl.

Totally Crushin'! Top 10 TV Crushes (Men's Choice)

2008-03-07T13:48:00.000-05:00

10. Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) - 30 Rock
Liz makes the list because, as TGS secretary Cerie (more on her later) once said, she makes smart sexy. She also makes glasses sexy, her hair is always messy hot, and the wardrobe department at 30 Rock clearly knows how to take advantage of the padded bra. Added points for Liz's infinite Star Wars knowledge, giving her massive nerd appeal.

9. Margene Heffman (Ginnifer Goodwin) - Big Love
The hottest and youngest of Bill Henrickson's three wives, Margene definitely makes a strong case for polygamy. Bill's not the only one with eyes for Margene though, as his oldest son Ben is often caught lusting after his third mommy (yeah, kind of creepy). Still, who can blame him, when you've got a cutie like Margene strutting around the house in short shorts, always looking for a good tickle fight.

8. Dee Reynolds (Kaitlin Olson) - It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia
Amongst everyone's favorite gang of social misfits from Philly, at least one of them is easy on the eyes. Kaitlin caught our attention as Cheryl's religious, Larry-hating sister on Curb Your Enthusiasm, but she stole our hearts as Sweet Dee, the petty, bitter alcoholic on It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

7. Tami Taylor (Connie Britton) - Friday Night Lights
With so many hot high school girls to choose from, it may seem a little odd to go with the MILF, but here's our reasoning: Go watch an episode of Spin City from about 10 years ago, and see how Britton has transformed from frumpy red head to fiery vixen in the past decade. Like a fine wine, Britton has come into her own creatively and physically as loving mother and wife, Tami Taylor.

6. Kate Austen (Evangeline Lilly) - Lost
For all the bad luck to fall on the survivor's of Oceanic 815, they should at least be counting their lucky stars to have been stranded with such a good looking group of people. Chief among these genetic masterpieces is Kate Austen, never shy to go for a swim in her skivvies, or even a little afternoon delight with Sawyer in a cage.

5. Amanda Tanen (Becki Newton) - Ugly Betty
If there were any justice in this world, Betty would be kicked to the curb somewhere on Corona and the name of the show would be changed to Pretty Amanda. Oh cruel world, why do ugly people get all the breaks in life? Okay, of course Ugly Betty wouldn't be as good without the sweet, naive Betty in the lead, but a little more screen time for Amanda wouldn't hurt either.

4. Christine Campbell (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) - The New Adventures Of Old Christine
Finally, my love of Julia Louis-Dreyfus has found a new home, Monday's at 9:30 on CBS. And somehow, almost ten years after Seinfeld ended, she looks better than ever. Christine's mixture of physical comedy and desperate horniness comes together to create the sexiest middle aged woman on television.

3. Claire Bennet (Hayden Panettiere) - Heroes
While some of us found Heroes to be groundbreaking television in 2006, others thought it was a complete snorefest, with boring characters and weak sci-fi cliches. One thing we can all agree on though is the now legal Hayden Panettiere's superpower is always looking superhot. Another thing we can all agree on: Milo Ventimiglia = creepy.

2. Cerie (Katrina Bowden) - 30 Rock
One spot on the list is just not enough for the ladies of 30 Rock (Sorry, Jane Krakowski, you almost made it). The higher honor goes to the receptionist at TGS, Cerie. Cerie may not be great at general administrative assistant duties, like putting pages in numeric order, but she's got what counts: an insanely skimpy wardrobe, great hair, and gravity defying breasts. And after her glowing endorsement of Diet Snapple, it's all I've been drinking. So far it's only got me a date with Wendy the Snapple lady, but it's a start!

1. Pam Beesly (Jenna Fischer) - The Office
Pam Beesly has firmly established her spot as pin-up girl for the Dilbert set. She's the ultimate girl next door, always barely made up, and revealing very little of what's under that sweater. With Pam, the less you get, the more you want. Which is why Toby, Ryan, Kevin, and even Michael continue to want. Damn you, Halpert!